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kairoscoachingsblog · 3 months

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Website: https://www.kairoscoaching.com.au

Address: Brisbane, Australia

Kairos Coaching, led by Debbie Wullschleger, specializes in trauma counseling and high-performance coaching. Utilizing the TRTP™ Process, Kairos Coaching adeptly addresses issues like anxiety, stress, PTSD, and burnout. Their services, available both online and in-person, are designed to empower individuals, helping them thrive and achieve their full potential. With a focus on healing and personal growth, Kairos Coaching offers a path to improved well-being and high performance in life and work.

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/debbie.wullschleger/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kairoshealthcoaching/

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tmstherapytreatment · 6 months

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At TMS Hubb, we strive to provide unique and evidence-based therapy to all individuals to maintain their physical fitness and physical activity. Our primary objective is to provide TMS treatment to those suffering from depression. Our experienced professionals assess your condition and prescribe the most suitable medication for your individual needs. Our services are particularly suitable for those with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), or Depersonalisation Disorder (DPD). As a health center in Australia, we prioritize patient safety above all else. Please do not hesitate to contact us by telephone at 7 2140 2500.

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ndis-therapy-brisbane · 3 years

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What is Smiling Depression?

WHAT IS SMILING DEPRESSION?

Millions of people in the United States struggle with depression. Whether genetics, circumstances or a little of both are the main cause, depression is a normal part of life for many. While some may say they sought help from a support system or professional when they thought they might have depression, for others it is not so easy. In fact, many find themselves pretending not to have it. They smile through the pain and force themselves to hide it from those around them. This phenomenon is known by the name of "smiling depression".

WHAT IS SMILING DEPRESSION?

While you won't find smiling depression in the DSM, it is still a branch of clinical depression that many find themselves struggling with. "Smiling depression" refers to someone struggling with a major depressive disorder (MDD) that masks their symptoms. He is often referred to by the phrase "hiding behind a smile". An individual could be dealing with this if they are trying to convince others that they are okay even though they are not.

Signs and symptoms:

People who struggle with smiling depression (also known as high-functioning major depressive disorder) will find themselves dealing with the classic signs of major depressive disorder. This includes feelings of sadness, hopelessness, anger, or irritability. It could also include loss of interest, tiredness, poor sleep patterns, reduced appetite, overeating, anxiety, and much more.

You may be dealing with smiling depression if you are experiencing these symptoms, but are still high functioning, keeping up with certain life demands like your work and a social calendar that people most weakened by their depression couldn't. People with high-functioning MDD may also find a cheerful or positive attitude. They often feel the need to hide their depressive symptoms.

Why are they hiding it?

There are a number of reasons why a person with high-functioning MDD might hide their symptoms. Some common reasons are included below.

Feel like a burden

Many people who struggle with depression often feel like a burden to those around them. To lessen this feeling, people can try to hide their symptoms.

Shame

While much work has been done to end the stigma of mental illness, it still exists. Some may try to hide their symptoms if they feel embarrassed or embarrassed about it.

Denial

Accepting that you may need help with your mental health is a big step for many people. People can hide their symptoms by denying their existence or not wanting them to be real instead of seeking help for depression.

Maintaining appearances

If someone is used to having a certain role in their life, they can hide their symptoms to keep up appearances. This can be a form of denial or trying to control your situation and yourself.

THE GREATEST RISK OF SMILING DEPRESSION

Those who suffer from severe depression can often be at risk of suicide. Symptoms of depression can make a person think about death. Those who suffer from smiling depression are often at higher risk for suicide because they don't get the help they need. Due to its ability to function at a high level, fewer people notice what they are experiencing. Those with smiling depression are more likely to commit suicide than those with low-functioning MDD.

Getting help

If you think you may be struggling with high-functioning depressive disorder, it is vital that you seek the attention of mental health professional. Working with a therapist close to you can help you navigate your depression and find the help you need to feel better.

How to help others

If you think someone you know is struggling with depression by smiling, share your concerns with them. It's important to open up that the conversation so they know they have someone to trust in their corner. Listen to them and try to connect them with a mental health professional. Use the fact that you are concerned about a friend's mental health as a springboard for action: move toward them, not away. Realizing that something is wrong and talking can be the encouragement they need to seek help.

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autism-diagnosis-brisbane1-blog · 5 years

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5 benefits of EMDR therapy for everyone ?

5 benefits of EMDR therapy for everyone

Eye movement to remove allergies and reprocessing ( EMDR ) is a valuable tool that has helped countless people remove trauma from their lives. This eight-stage process targets the patient's beliefs about his past, present, future and negative experiences.

EMDR has long been used to treat people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), anxiety and depression, but has shown to have benefits for all people. Here are some ways that EMDR treatment can help you.

Transform your beliefs

Many of us unconscious holds self-limiting beliefs based on unhappy experiences in our past. The refusal of childhood may have made you feel as if you were obliged to be around you, so try to take up a little less space on the bus seats and share opinions only if asked directly. Beliefs of the need to be perfect or not worthy of love can be traced to incidents such as childhood trauma or difficult collapse.

EMDR therapy helps to get rid of these negative beliefs, and shows you that they are just an explanation for an event, and that there are other healthier and positive explanations available.

Recovers from trauma

Psychologists recommend the use of EMDR for patients with PTSD, where it has proven extremely effective in treating all types of trauma. Through bilateral stimulation, both sides of the brain are involved in reprocessing painful memories. EMDR has shown that it helps in depression, anxiety, nightmares, sadness, divorce, bullying, abuse and many other trauma.

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Fast track of results

EMDR therapy takes a different approach from speaking therapy, and the issues that patients have tried to talk about

During years can be resolved in a few sessions. You also don't have to disclose all the details of your memories in EMDR, which is very useful if you're having trouble pronouncing.

Helps you manage some stress before it grows

Daily stress can cause losses over time if not handled and can lead to complete fatigue. You don't have to wait until you feel overwhelmed to do something about it. An occasional EMDR treatment session can help you overburden yourself from all the stress you are experiencing.

Continuous self-improvement

EMDR treatment is useful for everyone, not only for people with consciousness. Transforming negative beliefs can improve your relationships, work performance, creativity, health, and more. By calming the sound that says "I can't" or "Why bother", you can unlock your true potential.

Learn more about EMDR therapy

The Brisbane Consulting Center has used the EMDR program to help people for more than two decades. If you want to explore EMDR for anxiety, PTSD or any other problems related to you, visit the EMDR page or contact one of our specialists.

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truehopeworld · 4 years

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TrueHope Psychology and Counselling | Depression Treatment in Brisbane

Do you need help with depression and anxiety? True Hope Psychology provide counselling and psychotherapy to treat depression, anxiety, PTSD, and more. We service the Wynnum, Manly, Cannon Hill, East Brisbane, and Bayside areas. Our counsellors are registered psychologists. Medicare and Private Health rebates available. TrueHope are experienced psychologists who support you to find real relief from distress and find genuine hope. They are experts at helping you to find inner strengths that you didn’t know that you had, and connecting with you in an authentic, empathic, and non-judgemental way. They are all registered psychologists with a minimum of six years of university training and experience. Contact us for a free introductory chat to help us find the best fit for you. Call us at: 0434 794 524

Depression Treatment in Brisbane

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sscottstewart · 5 years

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7.37am 26 July 2017: “You’re drugs have fucked up your attention to detail” This is a typical statement made by my AVH’s. This may well be true, or may not be, but what I get out of it is that this is just more criticism. 02nd August 2017 2039: ?FM: is anyone getting hurt s: no, not as far as I know FM?: why is this happening s: because for once, and probably the first time, I would not do as you demand PW: you think we don’t exist don’t you s: yes, I think you don’t exist PW: You will find out that we do S: well won’t that

At approximately 3am on the 13th Sept 2016, Pam was being raped and assaulted, so I drove there at approx 100km per hour in each street and sat out front of her house. Immediately as I turned the engine off, 3 cars arrived.

One pulled into a driveway 35m down the street the house number was 121 or 123 pam’s street (for some reason my note said TA 121/123). I know this because it sat in the driveway for a while, and after I sat for about an hour or an hour and a half, I drove down to get its rego, and it had gone in/up the driveway behind fence gates and parked, so I couldn’t get the rego. I think it was a morone red Corolla hatch.

The car that arrived immediately as I turned my engine off was a white Hyundia hatch/wagon BX66PD. The third car went 120m dfown the street and I couldn’t see it properly

17th August 2018 0057 hours Entered the Muriel St car park of Hornsby Westfield, and there were two vehicles parked in the southern bays opposite Extreme clean. One was a large SUV type white station wagon CHR047, possibly Nissan or Toyota, the other I didn’t see properly, other than it being a two door sporty looking car, white also I think (but am unsure). My suspicion was aroused because they both left the parking bays and exited onto Muriel street as I was collecting my ticket from the machine to enter the car park (going to Hobbysew to collect cigarette buts). The larger white SUV looked similar to a car that boxed me in last Sunday 12th when I was visiting the adult shop to return 2 DVD’s as I stated I was going to (to try and get a result). The driver looked similar as well. Tall in thwe seat, very short balding hair, clean chaven, around 47 – 50 years old.

I have no problem with this if this is the bikies, and caused no problem the previous Sunday. But if I am supposed to behave in a requisite manner, thenI would wish that they don’t leave butt flag me down and say what I am supposed to comply with, or whatever purpose they have in being ahead of me and knowing where and when I will arrive at any particular location.

from:

Scott Stewart <[email protected]> to: [email protected], Alexandra Tintner <[email protected]>, [email protected], [email protected] date: 19 Jun 2019, 01:46 subject: Times Up – Future Violence In Normanhurst mailed-by: gmail.com

Righty right Boys.

It’s me again – Scott James Stewart – serial number 008, maturbator and schizophrenic.

I’m fucking sick of hearing about you in my mind (through you associate I am led to believe)

IF YOU DON’T SHOW UP AND FUCKING FIGHT, i’M GOING TO DESTROY YOUR REPUTATION, AND HOPEFULLY SOME OF YOUR FRIENDS.

Unit 5

29 Denman Parade,

Normanhurst, nsw, 2076

Or you can just reply to this email, or better still, if you have any balls at all, call me on

(02) 9989 8752. But you fucking wont, on the basis of some junkie like excuse.

If you attempt to get me sectioned, I will call the cops, and a few others, and exploit a weakness I have discovered in your organisation. Please check the addresses at the header of this email.

https://freemason-absolute-leader-declared.webnode.com/

http://be-careful-what-you-wish-for.strikingly.com

Gutless Ghost loving Freemason Cuntrs.

250719 0842

All fm? On the train going to tafe founfation skills workshop after peoole going on down the rear units and david recording me from outside my door

Scott did u log out No Well what r u goong to do about yr venterlinm paymemts Theres notng i can do Ur wrong I disagree How long will it take to prpve yr right I already jave que a bit of wvidemve to prove im right What do u think of farah I think so highly of her, that i believe yr earlier claims. Out of this world nice What should i do abouf julia Mot what u said u r doing to me. Ask the bandidos. U just lost. M u did S: well at least ots not for the earleir behaiour error made Actually it is Well whata that got to do h farah? J: Im not daying anymore S: ok . Bet u do Fm: what is going on scott is that garah will mot talk to u anymore S shame Fm: what dou think of that S there can only b 2 reasona for that M: theyr right S > i couldnt hear them? Fm: did u take drugs this morning S unfortunately yes, i did GMA : wjat do u think about drugs S they destroy lives Fm: female scotty stewart. What did mark kelly think S i have no idea. (They do!!) Fm: what do u think farah thinks I wouldnt have a clue (they do!!!) Scott – why wont anybody tell i the truth Becaise they camt know id whateber its is the truth. They camt know if its a lie…. wwhatever u r refering to 0906 M: what will happen to farah S she wiil get eaten M she already has —– ? Class cleague: do u like me? S i like everyone ? Cc u wont

ReplyForward

[email protected] bcc:[email protected], [email protected], [email protected] date:3 January 2018 at 21:38

A Humble Request From A Challenged Person

mailed-by:gmail.com

Good evening,

Sorry to bother you. My name is Scott James Stewart, and I you will recall my apologies for contacting previously. As you will recall from some of those emails, I am schizophrenic, and astoundingly, your club has become involved the maintenance of my continued good health .

I have developed a very effective psychosocial treatment of my phenomenological symptoms, that provides me with great relief. It involves quotations (what I call 1st person transcripts), of the Auditory Verbal Hallucinations (AVH’s) I experience irregulalrly, that are a common feature of the condition.

It really is the most amazing thing. All I have to do in order to maintain my good health is when the voices start talking (as they do occasionally) is undertake to write down the time and date, and as much of the exact first person quotations of what I hear as is comfortable, and things improve.

Inexplicably to me, they consistently include your clubs name, and allege to be some of your members who are also Freemasons.

I thought that since I publish this material, it would be ethical, to inform you of the work so that you may respond to the statements and request omissions if you choose.

https://evidenceortruth.wordpress.com/

amazingschizophreniavoices10.wordpress.com

(I am in the process of organising investigative health research in collaboration with Sydney University (Francesca Coniglio) and The Palmerston Clinic (Hornsby Hospital – BGr Dinah Bennet), and will soon be expanding the knowledge of this efficacious treatment approach to other individuals who are subject to AVH’s).

Regards,

Scott”

********************************************************************************************************************************

5) I discovered the hacking of one of the blogs within two hours and so deactivated both before they would have read them, so they also received inactive links as you did.

6) I wrote an brief introduction of my full name name and an ezpression of respect on the Rebels MC 1% Motorcylist Facebook page: (https://www.facebook.com/onepercenterbikers/)

******************************************************************************

(13:56)

My name is Scott James Stewart. I spent at least 13 minutes trying to find a less public way of introducing myself, and I apologise, but this was my result. I am a respectful, and honest individual, who may or may not come to your attention, perhaps again, nd congruent with my integrity efforts, I wanted to introduce myself to your esteemed club (despite the fact that the Police I talk to recommend that I should not do so). Having said this, I offer my introduction to you with special recognition of your affinity with those men whose PTSD you effectively treat through your strong and reliable friendship. Great men in my opinion. Should we ever meet or talk by chance or fate one day, I would be pleased to be able to immediately state, that I introduced myself to you on the 17 January 2018 on a Facebook page (though in gossipy world, others might say 16 January 2018 at approximately 7.30pm. No matter. My respect never changes).

**********************************************************************************************************

6) I have over the past year quite a few hacks on several duplicate blogs publishing the same Auditory Hallucinations statements. I did not even expect anyone would read them. I am compiling some substantiated evidence to facilitate an authoreatitive investigation that can indisputably attribute causality. I should disclose that I have unreliable suspicions of individuals, so maybe that might correlate with anything you discover if you have time to look into any of this. I am not requesting that you do. I am not scared, despite the reputation of the organisations involved. So thank you.

7) I plan to repeat this process of publishing two comparable blogs in the future, but the date of which I am ‘playing by ear’.

8) I need to also add (surprisingly) that my original crime stoppers report was to attempt to get your available resources if possible directed towards the mysterious and carefully checked disappearance of another individual who is featured in the blogs more than anyone. His name is Ron (Ronald) Thiessen, and he deserves the right to oversee the published material, but he is definately missing, he is famous and I have contacted his famous friends, and volunteer clubs etc, and the material in the blog leads me to serious concern for his safety because what is in the blog is damming and defamatory in my opinion. I have talked to your counter staff about him being missing, and read your website, but I cannot meet your seven pieces of documentation necessary to establish a formal missing person report. I can provide you with a document detailing the steps I have taken to locate him, if you are able to look into this. The most important and salient fact of this matter, is his membership of Freemasonry, which coincidentally is what links the two outlaw motorcycle clubs to the blogs, in addition to the members named, and the serious allegations made by my hallucinations against them.

My home phone is 9989 8752

My mobile (which I think has also been hacked) isa currently 0403 996 187 (probably change v. soon – I’ll let you know)

My address is

Gunyah

Unit 5

29 Denman Parade

Normanhurst, 2076.

Thank Gods for the cops

The Police Know 7.37am 26 July 2017: “You’re drugs have fucked up your attention to detail” This is a typical statement made by my AVH’s.

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thatsnotcanonpodcasts · 5 years

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Self-talk with Johanna Lyon

Self-talk is probably one of the most intimate and important things we can master for our own good. The way we talk to ourselves links to the way we see ourselves, and the way we interact with the world. It’s an aspect of our communication skills that we never get enough time on in school. This week I talk to the marvellous Johanna Lyon about self-talk, within a special context. In this bumper special, you get to listen to the first ever recording of Stumble Through. A recording I held back on releasing because of my own self-talk around it. I am really excited to show it to you, and of course to introduce Jo (that will be funny after you’ve listened).

Jo is a young artist passionate about laughing with others. Jo is most interested in discussing and unpacking why humans do what we do in areas of life regarding love, childhood and discrimination, among other things. She aims to achieve connection between strangers within her work. She is a truly marvellous human being that I am so lucky to call my friend. I am really glad I get to share this, and her, with you this week. Don’t forget to get tickets to her Short and Sweet show this weekend! They’re pretty cheap, and it’s an excellent excuse to take a trip to the Gold Coast.

Keep well,

-Paula

EPISODE NOTES:

Things We Mentioned

.....

Here are those definitions again, courtesy of Merriam-Webster

Self-talk

talk or thoughts directed at oneself

Self-esteem

a confidence and satisfaction in oneself: SELF-RESPECT

Synonyms: ego, pride, pridefulness, self-regard, self-respect

Self confidence

confidence in oneself and in one's powers and abilities

Synonyms: aplomb, assurance, confidence, self-assurance, self-assuredness, self-esteem, self-trust

Self-worth

a sense of one's own value as a human being: SELF-ESTEEM

Self-efficacy (this one came from the Cambridge Dictionary)

a person's belief that they can be successful when carrying out a particular task: Perceived self-efficacy refers to people's beliefs about their capabilities to exercise control over their own activities.

.....

Immersion therapy, also known as exposure therapy, is cognitive behavioural therapy technique usually used to treat anxiety disorders. The American Psychology association defines it as “Exposure therapy is a psychological treatment that was developed to help people confront their fears… a psychologist might recommend a program of exposure therapy in order to help break the pattern of avoidance and fear. In this form of therapy, psychologists create a safe environment in which to “expose” individuals to the things they fear and avoid. The exposure to the feared objects, activities or situations in a safe environment helps reduce fear and decrease avoidance.“

Read more about it here: https://www.apa.org/ptsd-guideline/patients-and-families/exposure-therapy

And recently, immersion therapy has taken on a new meaning. Immersion therapy is now also a technique in which people with some disabilities (mostly movement related) and injury can gain access to movement by being immersed in water. Read all about it here:

https://mycarespace.com.au/resources/immersion-therapy-what-is-it-and-how-can-it-help

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Self-perception theory So I got this one totally wrong. I said it was this thing where people believed that they were good by default, nuh uh. Self-perception theory was developed by Dr Daryl Bem, and “describes the process in which people, lacking initial attitudes or emotional responses, develop them by observing their own behavior and coming to conclusions as to what attitudes must have driven that behavior.” For more info, have a little read of this quick summary here: https://www.learning-theories.com/self-perception-theory-bem.html

I don’t know what I was thinking of, but let me know if you do!

.....

Our brilliant friend Peta Berghofer is a ceramic artist with really beautiful and tender work which is SOLD OUT. Keep an eye on her website here https://www.petaberghofer.com/about

and her Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/petaberghofer/

to make sure you don’t miss out when she gets new stock up.

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Robogals is a student run NFP which runs engineering and technology workshops in local communities. This is an amazing initiative which focuses on primary and secondary school students, check out their website here:https://robogals.org/

Steph Piper is probably the coolest and smartest person I know. She is a scientist, 3D printing engineer, and an amazing human being. Check out her amazing 3D printing skills, teacher resources, and learn more about her here: http://www.piper3dp.com/

Check out her amazing start up Spark Girlz which is a Toowoomba based company getting girls involved and excited about STEM. Learn more about them here: https://sparkgirlz.com/about-spark-girlz/

.....

Cluedo! Has closed unfortunately, but mark your calendars for next year! This is a night where you can dress up, eat good food and have excellent drink, while solving a murder with none of the nasty bits. The show is run by Brisbane Immersive Ensemble, who create amazing experience that you can hire out for corporate functions. Find them here: https://www.brisbaneimmersive.com/

.....

You can find Jo here:

Catch Jo in the brilliantly funny show The Coco Clan at Short and Sweet Festival this weekend at HOTA! Book your tickets here: https://hota.com.au/theatre/short-sweet-theatre/

Or at Sydney fringe here: https://sydneyfringe.com/browse-the-guide-2019

You can find her serving looks and lols on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/johannamate/

Had a chuckle? Feeling less alone? Don’t forget to rate and review the podcast! It tells the algorithm to suggest us to other people.

If you’ve stumbled upon us, you can join the community on Instagram as stumblethroughpod here: https://www.instagram.com/stumblethroughpod/

And on Facebook as Stumble Through Podcast here: https://www.facebook.com/Stumble-Through-Podcast-269167640447282/

Produced by That’s Not Canon Productions. Graphics by Claudia Piggott. Music by Jessica Fletcher.

Subscribe to us on ITUNES, STITCHER, SPOTIFY, RADIOPUBLIC or your podcatcher of choice.

Find us on FACEBOOK or INSTAGRAM.

#podcast #20s #worklifebalance #acting

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pikapepikachuu · 5 years

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'Centres of Excellence needed' to treat Australian veteran mental health

The committee has recommended assigning clear responsibility for transition to Defence and providing for a professional case management approach to support the transition process, Senator Molan said. Loading It is also important to recognise that those people close to transitioning ADF members may be on that journey with them and are often also the first line of support. For this reason, the committee supports making transition training and support services more broadly available to the families of transitioning ADF members and providing this access beyond the ADF members formal separation. A Defence spokesman said the government was reviewing the report's recommendations. The inquiry held hearings across the country, listening to evidence from individuals, support organisations such as Mates4Mates and the RSL, and research groups such as the Gallipoli Medical Research Foundation. In total, the final report made 11 detailed recommendations covering all aspects of the transition into civilian life, from mental health management to better support for families. It recommended Defence hire qualified professional case managers to help veterans who needed to contact the Department of Veterans Affairs and other agencies. A senior officer within Defence should also be assigned to oversee each veterans transition, the report said. The Defence spokesman said all members leaving the ADF are given transition support services delivered by transition coaches across 13 ADF Transition Centres nationally. As well as creating networked Centres of Treatment Excellence for mental health support and research, the report also recommended a sustained funding model for veterans health research and education, and a coordinated strategy to improve treatment for PTSD. "The first twelve months after separation are critical for mental health," the report said. "There is a need for the departments of Defence and Veterans Affairs to work closely together, as well as for an holistic and tailored approach to transition." Loading The report also recommended the government commission a study into the issues facing female veterans and their families to "better understand the issues facing women members of the ADF and women veterans" to "ensure that women have the best chance of achieving a successful transition from military to civilian life". The government was urged to establish a womens sexual trauma team within the military and develop a dedicated website for female veterans health needs. For the families of veterans making the transition, the report recommended a "full suite" of transition training seminars. Full medical records should also be made available to people leaving the military. For those seeking work outside the ADF, the report recommended study assistance and scholarships to help veterans find work outside the military. "The government is committed to ensuring that transitioned ADF members and their families have access to services and support to help them in post-service life, including rehabilitation, treatment, compensation and income support," the Defence spokesman said. "Securing civilian employment or meaningful engagement is an important enabler for the success of many ADF members who are transitioning from the ADF." The full report is available online. Lucy is the urban affairs reporter for the Brisbane Times, with a special interest in Brisbane City Council. Most Viewed in National Loading https://www.smh.com.au/national/queensland/centres-of-excellence-needed-to-treat-australian-veteran-mental-health-20190405-p51b7a.html?ref=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_source=rss_feed

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margarettesimpso-blog · 6 years

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youwillbearwitness · 7 years

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Brain discovery could lead to therapy for depression and PTSD Article by Sarah Wiedersehn of Brisbane Times Australian scientists have made an "exciting" discovery about the human brain that they say could lead to new treatments for numerous mental health conditions such as depression and post-traumatic stress disorder.

#Complex PTSD #Depression #ptsd

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ndis-therapy-brisbane · 3 years

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4 Tips for Connecting with your Teen

Connecting with your teen

Let's face it: adolescence is tough. They are riddled with hormones, physical and emotional changes, increased stress, and much more. For many families, this time becomes a period of disconnection between parents and teenage children. And this makes sense to some extent because as our children grow older, we want them to become more autonomous so that they can successfully launch themselves into the world. However, adolescence is the most important time to make an effort to stay connected with our children.

THE VALUE OF THE CONNECTION

Why? Well, the connection is the foundation of all relationships. The connection acts as an anchor that allows someone to venture safely into the world. For teens, a strong connection with parents translates into confidence, inner strength, and growing independence - all the things we want our teens to develop as they prepare to pitch. This anchor also allows us to safely weather relationship storms. When we feel connected to someone, we can stay afloat even when the relationship is unstable.

The connection also allows us to be receptive to comments. If we don't feel connected to someone, we are unlikely to listen and be open to any advice, guidance, or direction from them. As parents, our job is to provide support and guidance to our teens as they grow and learn. If we are disconnected, they are likely to ignore or rebel against our attempts to parent.

4 TIPS FOR CONNECTING WITH YOUR TEEN

Unlike when our children are younger and eager to spend time with us, it can be a bit more difficult to find ways to connect with our teens. We have to be aware of connecting daily and being creative. Here are some tips to get you started.

1. Show them that you care about what they care about.

As your teen grows older, she is likely to develop a variety of interests and passions. You may like and understand some of these interests, but others may seem totally alien to you. It is natural to show interest in our children when they are excited about the ideas and activities that we appreciate. But it is equally, if not more, important to show interest in those activities that do not align with our natural preferences.

Connect by showing genuine curiosity about what your teen likes. Ask them to show you the things they like. Try to participate in the activity or engage in their interest if possible. Connecting with your teen around his passions will help him feel that you care about him because of your effort to care about what is important to him.

2. Emphasize what you like about your teen.

When I work with teens in therapy, they often share that they don't think their parents like them. While I know this is not true, sometimes I can see how they might feel that way. As teens get older, the connection between them and their parents can feel more and more transactional: do this; Do not do that; why haven't you ... you get the idea. If you have a teenager, I bet you feel like you are constantly scolding them. As a result, teens can begin to internalize negativity in the relationship, often drawing closer to it and downplaying the positivity.

Therefore, it is crucial that you emphasize all the things that you like, admire, and appreciate about them, and remember to tell them these things regularly. This can also be helpful for parents who are starting to get stuck thinking their teens are disrespectful, lazy, and mean - you fill in the blank. Focusing on our teen's strengths is really good for both parties and fosters a more positive connection. Take a moment right now to write down 3-5 things you like about your teenager. Then be sure to tell them the next day.

3. Validate their feelings and experiences.

Oh, teens. To a teen, everything feels like the end of the world. For parents, it can be really easy to fall into the habit of belittling their experiences and feelings - because, sometimes, their problems are so small compared to what we know people can face every day. But for our teens, at that moment, their problem is likely to be insurmountable. And we don't help them feel better when we say things like, "It's not a big problem," "It's going to be okay," or my favorite, "You're just my drama." In fact, using these empathy busters will make them feel bad and it will go a long way in making them feel vulnerable and detached from you.

So instead, work to validate your teen's feelings and experiences - no matter how small you think the problem is. Try saying things like, "This sounds real hard," "I can figure out what's bothering you," or "tell me more."

4. Spending time together.

Well, I know this sounds hard. I mean, how many teens want to spend time with their parents? It's like their job to act like we're embarrassed, upset, and it's inappropriate to be around, right? The answer is tough, but I promise they still want to spend time with you. They likely aren't the ones to ask for it so don't take that as a sign that they don't want to hang out with you. Take the initiative and invite them to do things with you or ask to share with them the things you know they love. Make these times as stress-free as possible. Don't talk about things that you know cause conflict or discomfort. There is plenty of time to talk about the school and their to-do list. Protect this time until you both feel positive. Take this opportunity to observe them and commit to all of their incredible strengths. These positive interactions will enrich your relationship with your teen and build trust and communication between the two of you.

Prepare for a strong parent-child relationship

These are just a few ways to communicate with your teen. Remember, the connection is a fulcrum that will help your relationship overcome fickle teenage waters. Take every opportunity to strengthen this anchor so that when you step out from the other side, you will be able to pull the anchor and sail into the wonderful adult relationship with your child.

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