#OHANA MEANS FAMILY........ I gotta go lie down

[thecursedson]

What is your favorite thing about each of Bae's romantic ships?

     Hello, Nonnie! I am so glad that you asked because I love each of them for different reasons! Baelfire has six {6} romantic ships on my blog. None of them is canon, but one of them could have been if Bae didn’t get taken from the Enchanted Forest because he fell down the portal.  Not that it matters, really, but only one is with a girl and the rest are all boys {the same one that could have been canon if he didn’t get hurled into another dimension}. These are listed in no particular order just so you are aware! It’s also quite long of an answer which is why it is going under a read more! That being said, let’s jump right into this.

However big, however small, let me be part of it all – share your dreams with me.

     I’m going to start with Morraine and Baelfire. My favorite thing about this ship is how genuinely pure it is and how they were best friends first before turning into more. They are always there for each other and have been since they were kids. They are so happy together, and Morraine is the only person in the entire Enchanted Forest who didn’t run away from Baelfire because of who his father is. My second favorite thing about this ship is that I and the mun have compared their relationship to Cory and Topanga from Boy Meets World.  In a way, she challenges him like Topanga does, and it certainly does send Baelfire in a spin because he’s liked her for ages and doesn’t know how to handle it. Hand holding as they walk, shy smiles by the creek, and everlasting friendship… Their ship name is,  “You and I Belong Together.” This is the only ship on this list that ever had the potential to be canon in the OUAT fandom. { @morrxine } 

Hand in my hand and we promised to never let go.

     Next up, we have Astyne and Ellis. Also known in Ohana as Astellibae. Tell me that name doesn’t sound like a constellation? Fitting, given that it is a ship in Baelfire’s Star Trek verse. That being said, my favorite thing about this ship is how, despite every bit of Hell that they have been dragged through, they find Heaven within each other.  They always find comfort in one another, find a place of love and warmth when one of them is talking to them. They shower each other with compliments,  look out for one another. In a way, those three have become the family that they all needed when they all had no one. Side note, my other favorite thing is how seamlessly they went from just Astyne and Bae to Astyne, Bae and Ellis. It was effortless and easy… Now they’re their own sanctuary. Dogpile cuddle sessions, surprise visits at work, kisses to stop tears, and a lot of love… Their ship name is, “The Death of Me.” { @jrlixutxnant & @worseturns }

All the stars we steal from the night sky will never be enough.

      With this next ship, I’m gonna say that my favorite thing is that it is unexpected in the most beautiful way. Sometimes muses just find each other – friends, lovers, enemies, etc. In the case of Bae and Wil they found each other as friends first then slowly transitioned into something more.  They fell for each other in the most raw, unfiltered way. They were themselves. Unapologetically themselves and it worked in their favor.  Them being unapologetically themselves made their feelings even stronger, to the point now that they are hardly ever apart. Even if they are apart, they still feel each other’s presence and feel connected to one another. My second favorite thing? They are completely free together. They create beautiful works of art together, painting masterpieces all famous artists are envious of. Smeared canvasses, sunsets by the ocean, and nature’s magic running through their souls… Their ship name is, “The Artist and His Painting.” { @tinypaintedthings }

Don’t you wanna get away from the same old part you gotta play?

     Alright, onto the ship that happened gradually and over the many years that I have played Baelfire and that is Peter Pan and Bae. This is not the post where I go into specifics with it – I have a different post about why this is a thing on Bae’s blog. Anyway, my favorite thing about this ship… Is that how hard it is. Love isn’t easy. Love is sacrifice, it’s messy, it’s crying and screaming, it’s comfort while also storny…These two are anything but classic lovey-dovey. They never started out that way and they aren’t that way now.  They are a slow-burn ship. Very, very slow-burning.  There are times these two are as sweet as can be and others that they are at each other’s throats. It’s a little all over the place, but that’s what makes it so mesmerizing – it keeps you guessing.  I have two {2} Panfire ships, each one is different than the other in a lot of ways, but there are a few things that are similar which I’ve talked about throughout this paragraph. Soft words by the fire, moonlit walks under the stars, and a little dangerous love… Their ship name is, “The King and His Pup.” and “The Pan to My Fire” { @wickedlilsprite & @pueraeternuspan  }

It feels impossible. Is it impossible? Say that it’s possible.

     Last, but certainly not least, we come to the last romantic ship on Baelfire’s blog which is the one between Jace and Bae. My favorite thing about the two of them is that they work even if they don’t seem like they would. At first, these two hardly got along, not enemies, but just didn’t …Mesh. They naturally melded and found each other. Baelfire is the sweet to Jace’s salty. They compliment each other, which is another one of my favorite things. I mean the kind of compliment where they complete one another, not the kind where they get all romantic and suchies – even though they do that as well.  Jace brings out Baelfire little desire to be a bit… Rebellious and not always do what ‘Daddy says’.  Baelfire brings out Jace’s caring, protective nature.  They are blue eyes, black jeans, sugar and smoke rings… Their ship name is, “Strawberries and Cigarettes”. { @mcrgensternsandwarlcks }

     All of these ships have one of my favorite things in common which is that not one of them is plotted because I don’t do ships based on plots, I do them based on chemistry. Which meant, each one of them Baelfire picked on his own without my help. They all happened naturally, just muse to muse. This is what makes them each magical and memorable in their own way – as well as what makes Baelfire feel so strongly for each of the people he has a ship with. 

     I’m not going to lie, this was a hard message to write because I have a laundry list of favorite things about all of Baelfire’s romantic ships.  I could write you pages on each of them but I tried to pick one to two maximum. I hope that this answers your question! As always, you are more than welcome to ask more if you have any others you want to ask, or if I didn’t answer it well enough! Have a lovely night! ^-^ 

#Anonymous #{otp things} #{otp:You and I Belong Together} #{otp:The King and His Pup} #{otp:the pan to my fire} #{otp:the artist and his painting} #{otp:strawberries and cigarettes} #{otp:the death of me} #tinypaintedthings #wickedlilsprite #worseturns #jrlixutxnant #mcrgensternsandwarlcks #morrxine #{answered} #{mun answered}

[rawrmeansmemes]

DISNEY QUOTES MEME

send a   🏰  and I’ll generate a number, 1-166 and post the sentence as a starter. 

Ah, yes. Now what are you, and who are you doin' here?

Now, I'm warnin' ya. Don't let nobody or nothin' in the house.

I'm so ashamed of the fuss I made.

A lie keeps growing and growing until it's as plain as the nose on your face.

Well... guess he won't need me anymore. What does an actor want with a conscience, anyway?

You buttered your bread. Now sleep in it!

All we gotta do is build an act. Make ya a star. A headliner! 

Gab, gab, gab. They're always gossipin'.

If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all.

You know, just the other day, I was talking to myself about you, and we were wondering what had become of you.

So this is love. So this is what makes life divine. I'm all aglow...

Oh, that clock! Old killjoy. I hear you. "Come on, get up," you say, "Time to start another day."

I can't believe. Not anymore. There's nothing left to believe in. Nothing.

Oh, I wasn't... I mean, I do, but-but don't you think my dress...

Why, it's like a dream. A wonderful dream come true.

Oh, I understand, but... it's more than I ever hoped for.

Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction.

It would be so nice if something would make sense for a change.

Ah, that's just it. If you don't think, then you shouldn't talk.

if I lose my temper, you lose your head! Understand?

Curiosity often leads to trouble.

Better look first, for if one drinks much from a bottle marked "Poison", it's almost certain to disagree with you sooner or later.

Of course not. This is an unbirthday party.

Mustard! Yes, mu- MUSTARD? Don't let's be silly! Lemon, that's different...

Of all the silly nonsense, this is the stupidest tea party I've ever been to in all my life.

Goodness gracious, whatever shall we do?

It's... It's just that I never thought about it before. Say, that's it! You think of a wonderful thought.

Don't you understand, _____? You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!

Just a cute little bundle... of trouble!

You know, sometimes I don't think she's really very happy.

Well, I'm really not supposed to speak to strangers, but we've met before.

Well, *that* would make me happy.

But don't you remember? We've met before.

I'm awfully sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you.

Oh... I just love happy endings.

I'm so hungry I could eat  a whole elephant.

You idiots! You fools! You imbeciles!

I'm not sleepy. I'm hungry.

I'd like to tear his gizzard out.

Sounds like someone's sick. How lovely. I do hope it's serious. Something dreadful.

When he stays out all night, he's always grumpy the next morning.

This will take brains, not brawn.

I was just wonderin', are we good guys or bad guys? You know, I mean, uh? Our robbin' the rich to feed the poor.

Rob? Tsk tsk tsk. That's a naughty word. We never rob. We just sort of borrow a bit from those who can afford it.

Oh, he's so handsome, just like his reward posters.

Wowee! I'm tip-top, alright, but I'm not as good as he is.

Look, why don't you stop moonin' and mopin' around? - Just - Just marry the girl.

Ladies don't start fights, but they can finish them!

Why, your eyes are like sapphires sparkling so bright. They make the morning radiant and light.

Wait a minute. I'm the leader! I'm the one that says when we go.

You FORCE them to like you, idiot!

You get down there and find the big diamond, or you will never see the teddy a - gain!

We're still friends, right?

Don't worry, old fellow. It's not *entirely* hopeless.

There's no evil scheme he wouldn't concoct! No depravity he wouldn't commit.

Now, you will remember to smile for the camera, won't you? Say "Cheese".

I'm afraid that you've gone and upset me. You know what happens when someone upsets me.

Hey, man, if this is torture, chain me to the wall.

Isn't it rather dangerous to use ones entire vocabulary in a single sentence?

Hey, man, you're ugly! And you're uglier than him! And you're Ugly, Part Three! Hey, you're Revenge of the Ugly!

Ooh, I think she likes me, man!

Hm. Teenagers. They think they know everything. You give them an inch, they swim all over you.

My nerves are shot. This is a catastrophe!

Have I ever been wrong? I mean when it's important!

I just don't see how a world that makes such wonderful things could be bad.

You'll have your looks. Your pretty face and don't underestimate the importance of "body language." Ha!

This has got to be, without a doubt, the single most humiliating day of my life!

I didn't make it all the way through third grade for nothing.

Well, there's the usual things. Flowers, chocolates, promises you don't intend to keep.

How can you read this? There's no pictures!

This is yet another example of the late neoclassic Baroque period. And, as I always say, "If it's not Baroque, don't fix it!".

Oh dear. That didn't go very well at all, did it?

Couldn't keep quiet, could we? Just had to invite him to stay, didn't we?

I'd like to thank you all for coming to my wedding. But first I'd better go in there and uh, propose to the girl!

All right, Sparky, here's the deal. If you wanna court the little lady, you gotta be a straight shooter. Do ya got it?

No, really. On a scale of one to ten, you are an eleven.

How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?

Arrrgh! This is the *stupidest* vacation! You drag me from home, jam me into this dumb car, drive me a million miles away to see some stupid rat show!

Oh yes, the past can hurt. But from the way I see it, you can either run from it, or... learn from it.

I'm surrounded by idiots...

I laugh in the face of danger

Being brave doesn’t mean you go looking for trouble

For what? This? I've gotten out of worse scrapes than this. Can't think of anything right now, but.

I'd rather die tomorrow than live a hundred years without knowing you.

Is this bottomless pit a friend of yours?

You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.

You uncultured swine! What're you lookin' at, ya hockey puck?

I've set my laser from stun to kill.

Oh, great. If anyone attacks we can blink em' to death.

Candlelight, privacy, music. Can't think of a better place for hand-to-hand combat.

Speaking of trouble, we should have run into some by now.

Why is it, whenever we meet, I end up bleeding?

You leave town for a couple of decades and they change everything.

I'm a damsel, I'm in distress, I can handle this. Have a nice day.

You know, wh-when I was a kid, I-I would have given anything to be exactly like everybody else.

Fabulous party. You know, I haven't seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself.

Would you like to stay forever?

My little baby, off to destroy people.

Ooh, I think my bunny slippers just ran for cover. Come on, scare me, girl!

They popped out of the snow, like daisies!

First rule of leadership: Everything is your fault.

You listen to me, my boy. I've made a living out of being a failure, and you, sir, are not a failure.

Do I look stupid to you? 

I was saved! I was saved by a flying wild man in a loincloth.

Are you sure this water's sanitary? It looks questionable to me!

Um, okay, but it won't be the same coming from me.

But I don't wanna use my head!

I may not be a smart dog, but I know what roadkill is.

Don't tell me. We're about to go over a huge waterfall.

It's called a "cruel irony", like my dependence on you.

Why do we even *have* that lever?

Break it down? Are ya kidding me? This is hand-carved mahogany.

That is the last time we take directions from a squirrel.

Oh, he's doing his own theme music? Big, dumb and tone deaf. 

Is there anything on this menu that is not swimming in gravy?

We done a lot of things we're not proud of. Robbing graves, eh, plundering tombs, double parking. But, nobody got hurt. Well, maybe somebody got hurt, but nobody we knew.

Hey, look, I made a bridge. It only took me like, what? Ten seconds? Eleven, tops.

Well, as far as me goes, I just like to blow things up.

C'mon, fight that plaque! Fight that plaque! Scary monsters don't have plaque!'

Now, put that thing back where it came from, or so help me...!

Ha, ha, ha. You've been jealous of my good looks since the fourth grade, pal.

You know, like on the street, with the honk-honk and the vroom-vroom, and the no walking involved?

Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind, or forgotten.

My friends need to be punished.

Leave me alone to diiieee...

This is you, and this is your badness level. It's unusually high for someone your size.

You'll like it, 'cause it's stinky, LIKE YOU! 

"Oh, look at me, I'm a flippy little dolphin, let me flip for you! Ain't I something?"

Well, you never really know you know, but when they know, you'll know, ya know?

There he is. Ha ha! Come here, loverboy.

I mean, who wants the pressure of being super all the time?

You know?! For a little bit. I feel like the maid: "I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for, for 10 minutes?! Please?!"

Now, I'll tell you what we're not gonna do. We're not gonna panic, we're not gonna die.

I never look back, darling. It distracts from the now.

Boy, I'm pretty good at this lawyerin' stuff!

You and me... we're in a club now.

Swear you'll take us there. Cross your heart! Cross it! Cross your heart!

I know this may seem boring, but I think the boring stuff is what I remember the most.

I was hiding under your porch because I love you.

There is no way I am kissing a frog and eating a bug on the same day.

If I can mince, you can dance.

I was beginning to think wishing on stars was just for babies and crazy people...

Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. This is bad. This is very, very bad. This is really bad'! 

Stay calm. It can probably smell fear.

I've always wanted to go out with a bang!

Yeah, this one we caught sticking his bumper where it didn't belong!

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

I don't wanna be the bad guy anymore.

Well, this place just got interesting.

Tut tut! As your merciful princess, I hereby decree that everyone who was ever mean to me shall be… executed.

They get away with murder! I can never get away with anything!

I'm gonna wipe the floor with that little know-it-all.

Wait, what am I looking at right now? Why are you hanging off the earth like a bat?

I've always wanted a nose! So cute; it's like little baby unicorn!

Oh, look at that. I've been impaled.

On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?

Hey, kid? If you're pullin' my leg, I'm gonna eat yours.

I'm doing the happy dance, I'm not wearing any pants!

Crying helps me slow down and obsess over the weight of life's problems.

Well, he was right about one thing; I don't know when to quit!

Never let them see that they get to you.

It's called a hustle, sweetheart.

Life isn't some cartoon musical where you sing a little song and all your insipid dreams magically come true! So let...it...go.

I'm sorry. I gotta blink. How do you hold your eyes open that long?

You trust her. Becky's eating a cup.

When you use a bird to write with, it's called tweeting.

#rp meme #rp memes #starter sentences #rp generator meme #generator meme

[nickireadstfc]

The Foxhole Court, Chapter 14 – Ohana Means Family (And Family Means No One Gets Left Behind Or Murd– Oh).

In which we are treated to part 2 of Fun Suspicious Club Times, Andreil has Important Moments™, Nicky has thoughts on family, and I have all the feels. Guest starring: Murder!

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read – and finish – The Foxhole Court.

This is it, you guys. We’ve reached the last chapter of The Foxhole Court – or, as I like to call it by now, The Exposition Court. Lots of things have been shown, explained and introduced, and while that has been very fun and all, not much has actually happened. Now, however, exposition is done, and with this chapter I can practically smell the plot lingering just around the corner.

Let’s finish this, shall we?

We’re kicking things off with yet another #iconic Andreil bit:

           “Oh, he made it,” Andrew said. “That’s interesting.”

           He pressed two fingers to Neil’s throat, checking his pulse. When Neil tried to bat him away, Andrew caught his wrist with his free hand. His smile was small and fierce as he leaned forward into Neil’s space.

           “Remember this feeling. This is the moment you stop being the rabbit.”

GOOD SHIT.

If I had a euro for every time I saw this quote on a pastel/b&w grunge edit I’d have enough money to buy those two a honeymoon vacation.

Honorary mention, because I feel like this is a detail that usually gets left out of those edits:

           Neil was too startled to answer (…).

I love me some Neil ‘Andrew Is Not Being Horrible To Me, What Is This Feeling, Send Help’ Josten.

           Movement two doors down gave Neil a reason to look away from Andrew again. Five strangers were knocking on his suite door. She stepped out to greet them, slapping back and high-fiving as he moved into their ranks. Allison wasn’t far behind them. She pressed against Seth’s back and slid her hands down his sides to his pants. Neil watched as she systematically dug through all of his pockets.

She’s searching him for drugs, that much I got when reading it first. I didn’t think much of it then.

Oh boy. I’ll regret not thinking about this detail in 9 pages’ time.

           “Renee should be back with drinks any second. She said she’ll get something non-alcoholic for the two of you.”

           “Oh, what a waste,” Andrew said. “I’m buying Neil’s drinks tonight.”

           It took them a couple second to catch on. When they did, Dan lurched out of the doorway with a hard, “You’re joking.”

Oh, yeah, by the way, did I forget to mention that? They’re fucking going back to Columbia for yet another night of Suspicious And Problematic Debauchery.

WHY. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING. DID YOU NOT LEARN FROM LAST TIME.

Thankfully, Dan and Matt share my concerns:

           “He is not going out with you again. He’ll probably wind up dead this time.”

           “Jesus, Dan,” Nicky said. “When you say things like that it makes me think you don’t trust us.”

           “No one trusts you,” Matt said.

Oh shit, Tall Billie Joe, where did you get your sass from?? I like.

In response to that, Andrew speaks German to Neil, which a) Neil is Totally Not On Board With, and b) triggers yet another Andreil Moment™ because this chapter is just dishing those out left and right.

           Andrew was daring him to cross a line, to give up a little more of the lie that was Neil Josten. It went against everything Neil knew to give in, but he’d chose his path. He’d chosen Andrew. He buried his fear as deep as he could and answered in German.

Lasst mich hier zum Sterben, bitte.

We don’t have much time to ponder on the feels, though, as everyone’s favourite comic relief swoops in again, providing us with one of my favourite exchanges of this chapter:

           “Oh shit,” Nicky said, switching languages in a heartbeat. “Since when do you speak German? Andrew, you knew about this? Why didn’t you tell us?”

           “Boring,” Andrew said. “Figure things out for yourself once in a while.”

Bhahahaha. Andrew has zero time for anyone’s shit and I am loving it.

           Nicky waggled a hand at Aaron. “Quick. Have we said anything totally incriminating these past few months?”

           “Aside from your endless inappropriate comments about what you’d like to do to him, I don’t think so. Looks like you’ve managed to completely embarrass yourself in both languages.”

Ahahapfpfhfggdhfhdf ME. Seriously, print that last sentence on the coffin my akward bilingual ass will one day be buried in.

           Aaron looked at Neil. “When were you going to tell us?”

           “I wasn’t,” Neil said. “After everything I’ve put up with from you this year I figured I didn’t owe you any favours.”

Sassmaster Josten strikes again. <3 Also, he’s got a point.

The others are, understandably, a bit stunned at that exchange. And they didn’t even get the whole sass fest that went down. Pity.

           Matt was the first to get his tongue back, but the best he came up with was, “I thought you spoke French. That was French this morning, right? At Kathy’s?”

Precious Cinnamon Roll Discovers That Some People May Speak More Than Two Languages, Too Good For This World, Too Pure.

They leave, they drive to Columbia, bla bla bla.

As the monster squad (feat. Neil) arrives in their favourite ice cream-and-drugs joint, Neil is once again presented with his mortal enemy: New clothes.

           “This is new,” Neil said.

           “It’d be tacky to let your wear the same thing twice, wouldn’t it?” Nicky asked.

Uhm, no, it fucking wouldn’t? If an outfit’s cute I’ll wear it more than once, thank you very fucking much. And from what I’ve gathered, Neil’s outfit from last time was on point.

What kind of capitalist elitist bullshit is this, Hemmick.

           “How to say this?” Nicky thought it over for a second, then gave up on tact. “You could obviously use the money more than he could right now. Let Andrew give you things if he wants to. He’s not normally the gifting type, so it’s kind of fun.”

Just………… Andrew……… who never gives gifts………. buying his boyfriend clothes…….. t w i c e………… I’m fine :’)))))

           “I have my own money,” Neil said. “I don’t need handouts.”

           “Really?” Nicky asked, sending Neil’s clothes a meaningful look.

           Neil stared at him. He knew Andrew hadn’t told the others about his fluency in German, but he hadn’t realized Andrew kept quiet about his money, too. (…) But Andrew had found Neil’s money before their truce in Wymack’s living room. He hadn’t had a reason to protect Neil then, so why had he stayed quiet?

LISTEN……….. I’M…………. FINE…………. :’))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I thought we were going to be done here. Clothes handed out, banter shared, fun times, now let Neil change and get on with your dumb drug night.

I was wrong.

Nicky and Neil settle down for some Real Talk that makes up for like, so many things that the monsters fucked up in the past.

            “You do know what you’re doing out with us tonight, right? Andrew squeezed some sort of explanation in to his usual crazy nonsense?”

           “Sort of,” Neil said. “He said he’d have answers for me later.”

           “You’ve got to be kidding me.” Nicky looked pained. “This means Andrew is keeping you, same as he kept Kevin. It means you’re part of the family now.”

ASGKLKGJDGNLNFGFFFHFHGG.

FAMILY.

I AM YELLING. I CANNOT STOP YELLING. HOW IS THIS HAPPENING.

This is huge, you guys. From all we’re told later, this is not a word Andrew throws around easily.

FAMILY.

Leave me here to DIE.

           Nicky made air quotes with his fingers. As soon as he spoke Neil knew whose words he was echoing, but Neil doubted Andrew sounded so tired when he first said it: “Being related doesn’t make us family.

(…) I know why Andrew feels that way, and I understand why he and Aaron can’t stand each other, but I’m not willing to give up on them yet. I want to fix this and show them they’re wrong.”

Shit, dude. That’s... unexpectedly serious and deep coming from you?

You know something’s important when even the comic relief is serious about it.

           “Family means something different with us because it has to. It’s not about blood. It’s not even about who we like. It’s about who Andrew is willing to protect.”

Give me the Minyard-Hemmick’s backstory, and give it to me now.

           Neil’s stomach twisted with another chilly what-if. “And he’s including me because of this morning?”

           “Partly,” Nicky said. “But partly because you’re the reason Kevin’s going to stay on our team. Andrew’s got Kevin’s back, but you’ve got Kevin’s attention.”

Meaning Kevin is stuck in a beautiful Andrew and Neil sandwich. <3

Also “a chilly what-if” is such a great expression, what the fuck, 10/10.

Before this Real Talk can end, Nicky has one last thing to say, which is specifically something I am very happy about:

           “Look, I know we screwed up last time. Please believe me when I say Andrew was just looking out for the rest of us. He didn’t want to take any chances. But things are different now. You’re one of us, which means we’ll never push you further than you’re willing to go. Okay?”

You go, Nicky, for realizing you fucked up and wanting to put things right between you and Neil.

But also, you go, Neil, for not immediately accepting his excuse, because shit, that crap was still not okay and you gotta apologize a bit more than that.

Plus, it would be kind of nice to have someone other than Nicky come apologize some time – lookin’ @ you, Twinyards and Big Deal Day.

Also, consent only matters with people you like, is that what you’re telling me? Deep sigh.

Ah, remember how I was “fine :’)))))” earlier?

           Neil pulled out his contacts and flicked them into the trash. When he looked up at the mirror, bright blue eyes stared back. Neil couldn’t be himself, but maybe he could be the Neil he’d given Andrew in Wymack’s living room.

:’)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) fine.

They leave Sweetie’s and they go to the club, where I experience some heavy déjà-vu, and not the funny kind – more the ‘Oh hey this is the place where you got date-drugged, date-kiss-raped and date-interrogated, haha fun times amirite’ kind.

There is one bit of interesting information that stuck out to me in the midst of Andrew and Neil’s usual ‘Hey welcome to the club, hey fucker did you know that drugs are bad’ dialogue:

            “We got into dust for Aaron’s sake. He needed something safe to get on when he was coming off everything his mother gave him.”

His mother gave him drugs?? The hell?? These could be either actual drugs – like, cocaine and shit – or we could be going down the old ‘medication you’re not taking voluntarily is bad for you’ trip and she’s given him antidepressants or something similar.

I’m not loving either option, although – if the latter thing is true – it would be interesting to find out whether Aaron has the same mental health problems as Andrew does, with them being identical twins and all.

Did you have enough Andreil Moments™ today?

           “Here’s some honesty,” Neil said. “I don’t like you, and I don’t trust you.”

           “It’s mutual,” Andrew said.

Honestly, when will they stop being the literal embodiment of the enemies to lovers trope.

Time for the indisputably most #iconic bit of this entire chapter:

           A group of people shouldered their way up to the bar counter at Neil’s back, pushing him into Andrew. Andrew didn’t budge beneath his weight. He was something solid to lean against, something violent and fierce and unmoving. Neil couldn’t remember what it felt like to have someone hold him up. It was terrifying and liberating all at once. His life was out of his control now; he was giving it to Andrew and hoping Andrew would keep it safe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH

Neil, bby, if this is your way of showing how much you don’t like and don’t trust him, you’re doing a pretty, pretty shit job of it.

Sadly, the gay comes to an end and they return to the rest, who are enjoying one of their favourite pastimes: Getting the fuck wasted.

And just as I was beginning to wonder whether that was going to be it or whether the book was going to go out with a bang, and if so what exactly that bang would entail and when it was finally gonna appear – this shit happens.

           “What do you want?” Andrew asked, and listened as Wymack explained it all over again. “Overdosed like how?”

           “Again?” Nicky said incredulously. “That stupid bastard.”

           “Never again,” Andrew said over his shoulder. “He’s dead.”

WHAT.

WHAT.

WHAT.

           “Seth.” Andrew hung up and tapped the phone against his thigh. “Someone found him face-down in the bathroom at Bacchus where he drowned in his own puke. It’s exactly how I warned him he was going to clock out, not that he ever listened to me.”

Are you SHITTING me.

I like to joke about murder and death and shit, but this is ACTUAL DEATH happening, and WITHIN THE FIRST BOOK.

WHAT THE SHIT.

           Neil looked at him, surprised at how hard Nicky and Aaron were taking it. He wondered if he was supposed to feel something besides shock, but a mental health check came back clean. He’d grown up around death. It was nothing to him now but ice in his veins and a reminder to keep moving. Seth should have been an exception, since Neil had been living with him for months, but Neil had never liked him.

Stone Cold Bitch Neil Jostens strikes again. <3

And his BF isn’t much better, either:

           “What about the line-up?” Kevin asked.

           Nicky winced. “Kevin, the man is dead. Like, permanently.”

           “It’s not a major loss,” Kevin said.

WHY IS THIS SUCH A KEVIN MOVE. A dude dies and all you can think about is the impact on Exy.

Although, having thought about it for a bit, I have to say: I’m not super sad Seth is dead, either. I view his death as an important plot element (as it triggers future events and is important to demonstrate the cruelty of the Moriyamas) and I feel sad because characters I like will feel sad, but nothing more.

I didn’t like him when he was alive, and I’m not going to start pretending to like him now. I think it’s hypocritical to pretend to mourn the death of a person you disliked just because it is socially expected of you to be sad.

This does not invalidate the pain felt by others who mourn this person, of course. But I myself will not pretend to be sad if I am not, I feel like it would dishonour their memory if I would.

(Do come talk to me about this in my ask box if you’ve got something to add or if you disagree. I think this is an interesting subject and I’d love to hear different opinions.)

           “Is that why you drink?” Neil asked. “You don’t want to feel?”

           Andrew turned to face him. Neil wasn’t expecting it and almost ran into him. Andrew dugs his fingertip into the hollow of Neil’s throat in warning. This close Neil could smell the alcohol and cigarettes on him. It made him think of his mother burning to ashes on the beach.

I’m sorry, I know it’s supposed to be all dramatic and angsty here, but I can never take the phrase “X reminded them of their mother” seriously, or any variations of it. Even when it’s fitting, it just sounds so pretentious.

           He reached out without thinking and took Andrew’s cigarette away. For some reason Andrew let him keep it.

           “I don’t feel for anyone or anything,” Andrew said. “Don’t forget that.”

           “So Kevin’s just a hobby for you?”

I would like to point out here that Andrew immediately changes subjects after that, after Neil confronted him with the possibility that he could maybe, maybe feel something more than absolute indifference to Kevin. I’m just……….. putting that out there.

           “If [Seth] didn’t have his pills on him, how did he overdose?”

           “Not by choice,” Andrew said. “My theory says Riko won this round.”

WHAT. Are you telling me this is not only actual death happening, but ACTUAL MURDER??????

           Neil stared at him. “You don’t really think Riko did this.”

           “I think the timing’s too convenient for it to be an accident,” Andrew said. “Riko broke Kevin’s hand for being better. He crossed districts because Kevin picked up a racquet and got back on the court. What do you think he’s willing to do to you for calling him useless on national TV?”

Y E L L I N G.

WHAT THE SHITS.

Oh boy. Oh boy. This is shaping up to be a great next book. Did I complain about there being little plot so far? Well, shit. HERE’S YA FECKIN PLOT.

Fancy a dash of Feelings™ before we leave this show?

           Andrew hooked his fingers in the collar of Neil’s shirt and tugged just enough for Neil to feel it. “I know what I’m doing. I knew what I was agreeing to when I took Kevin’s side. I knew what it could cost us and how far I’d have to go. Understand? You aren’t going anywhere. You’re staying here.”

:’))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) andrewiloveyoupleaseneverleavepleaseprotectus

           Neil looked down at the key in his hand. “Home,” he whispered, needing to hear it aloud. It was a foreign concept to him, an impossible dream. It was frightening and wonderful all at once, and it set his heart racing so fast he thought it’d drum out of his chest. “Welcome home, Neil.”

………………………………………………. I’m dead.

Goodbye, The Foxhole Court.

Hello, The Raven King.

((Side note: But Nicki, What’s Happening Now??

I’ll be reading the other two books as well, obviously. As if I could stop now.

I won’t continue straight this Sunday, instead I’ll be doing something else, a bit of an experiment: I’m doing a review of the whole first book, hopefully with a bit more thought and depth than what I’ve rambled so far. Think of it as both an interlude and a summary. If I like it (and you do as well), I’ll do one of those after every book.

I’ll skip the Wednesday upload to take a bit of a breather and I will continue reading The Raven King the Sunday after that, that’s the 30th of April. More sportsball! More feels! More murder! Yay!

Also, I won’t rename this blog. I know TFC is just the first book and the whole thing is called All For The Game, so it should be ‘nickireadsaftg’, but I also don’t give a shit. I’ve gotten used to this now and y’all will just have to suck it up and deal with it. I put a lil note in my bio saying what book I’m on, that should be enough.

Lastly: Thank you all for sticking with me so far. Your endless messages, comments and funny tags mean the world to me, and you all are the reason my motivation stuck around till this point. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I’ll see you Sunday. Lots of love.))

#tfc #the foxhole court #aftg #all for the game #nora sakavic #nicki reads tfc #yall........................ im proper emotional okay come freak out with me #I CANT BELIEVE ITS FINISHED WHATTTTTTTTTTTT #this went so quickly