#I'm feeling like shit rn

[rei-comfort-zone]

Guys, I'm feeling like shit rn, idk what to do, I literally just made a Twitter/X account to search on Evan Dorkin's profile about Ironjaw's info [I didn't find anything, I was kinda happy and hyped] but not now since well, I saw someone, an account telling that I draw Josh skinny-... like I only draw him mostly 3/4 times? Once [and first time only the FACE headcanon of my detailed artstyle that I already forgotten nowdays and the most recents are the silly doodle style that is literally miniature and quick content [just no thoughts just silly drawings] that I don't think a lot about it

I thought I was doing a good job

So yeah I feel shitty, I didn't knew someone would think bad about it or idk make some assumptions, maybe I didn't draw him as it should(? Well that's what my head is saying to me, I'm just gonna leave this account for some days maybe(?

De paso,habló español por si no sabías o si te tengo que avisar dato extra y ahora que encontré ese post te pido que por favor lo borres, es lo mínimo, no espero disculpas ni que me hables solo eso nomas, y yo se que vas a ver este post mío cualquier día porque el segundo screenshot es de dibujos recientes y te pido perdón si pensaste que lo estaba haciendo flaco [aunque el segundo screenshot fue de un dibujo que hice en la madrugada que nisiquiera estaba enfocado en Josh sino en Jerry con un glaive que de colmo era un primer pedido que hice apurado, yo solo hago contenido enfocado en mis ocs, mi vida, Ironjaw y Jerry más que nada]

#welcome to eltingville #the eltingville club #twitter #any advice? #I'm feeling like shit rn #idk what to do too #idk #mae estoy hecho mierda ahora que me puse a sobrepensar #josh levy

[littlnymp]

So scared of showering because I'm gonna see myself naked 😭😭

#laziness or depression? #I'm feeling like shit rn

[the-punforgiven]

Hey, I'm really sorry to have to ask y'all, but my family and I are being evicted from our home and we can't really afford to live anywhere else.

We've been saving up for a while and we've found a place we can almost afford, but we're still short about $4,400. So like, if you have anything you can do to help I'd greatly appreciate it, but like, I get that times are tough all around so I totally understand if you don't

Here's a link to my paypal, but like, please only donate if you've got the cash to spare, I don't want anyone to go hungry on my account

#I'm sorry to have to do this y'all ;-; #Idk what else to even do though #like this shabby little trailer we're looking at is like the second cheapest place in the entire town #we're getting kicked out of the first #the rent was dirt cheap due to the asbestos and ghosts and even then we could barely afford it lol #I wish I could offer emergency commissions or something but I've been so paralyzed by the stress of this whole situation #it's hard to do shit like draw and I'm afraid if I do the emergency commissions thing the stress'll just crush me #as if it hasn't been already lol #and I feel bad because there's like #so much more important shit in the world going on rn #and more important voices that need to be heard than mine #but also like #we need a place to live #y'know? #sorry for this again ;-; #pun's text posts #help

[greenbergsays]

YOU LOST YOUR AIRPODS IN THE CHIP AISLE???? Was it like a momentary loss? Noticed they were gone, went back, found them? Or did they disappear from the chip aisle never to be seen again?

I lost them in the chip aisle twice.

So, like. The story is this: I kept my AirPods in the outside pocket of my old bag. That pocket, incidentally, is also the place where I kept my work keys for my old job, so more often than not I forgot to zip it back.

My brother and I had gone to the store to get stuff for sandwiches & chips and when I bent over to get a variety pack of chips, the AirPod case slipped out of the unzipped pocket, fell on the floor, and the AirPods went flying in two different directions

That first time, I was only able to recover one earbud, even though we spent like 30 minutes in that aisle looking for it. I rectified that situation with my credit card, which might be a little irresponsible but I justified it to myself because I worked in an open office at my old job and needed wireless, noise-cancelling headphones to drown everyone else out so I could focus and I wasn't allowed over-the-ear ones.

For a few weeks, I got really good about double-checking that the zipper to that little pocket was closed. But I got distracted one day like two months later, I didn't check, and it happened again.

The same aisle of the same exact grocery store, the same bend-over-AirPod-case-falls-out scenario. That time, we were able to recover both of them, and thank God for that, because I wouldn't have been able to justify another replacement to myself. I felt guilty enough about the first time.

Ever since the second time, my brother won't let me get out of the car with my AirPods anywhere on my person and even when he knows I left them in the car, he won't let me go down the chip aisle.

It's so bad that if his kids accompany us to the store and I go near the chips, they're like, "Ohhh, Aunt [Dessie], you know you're not supposed to be on this aisle! I'm telling!"

I'm not gonna say that it's unwarranted or that I'm undeserving of it, but two years without an incident should mean something

#nani asks #greenberg replies #rl shit #i'm at least 98% sure there's a post somewhere on my blog of when it happened but i don't feel like looking for it rn #so a quick rehash it is

[justarandomlambblog]

Most of this is messy and rushed but I had fun with that single panel with a detailed pumpkin

(Part One Here)

Anyway what a sheltered world where some person starts following you around town so you just lead them home and invite them to dinner (and make them carry the heavy item your sister added to the list when your back was turned) I'm sure this kindness and trust Narinder has in the world around him won't come back to bite his entire family in the ass

Lamb: I think the Bishops might be back The Bishops: Lamb: shocked pikachu face Crown: Why are we gasping? We already knew this.

Leshy without his bandages is cursed yet also adorable. Look at that bush worm. He has eyes! He's still blind but he has eyeballs!

#cult of the lamb #justa arts #sketch #narinder cotl #the lamb cotl #baal cotl #aym cotl #Leshy cotl #yellow cat cotl #Heket cotl #Shamura cotl #Kallamar cotl #Leshycat #all my art skills were used up on p1 #but I really wanted to draw a p2 #anyway Narinder is calm and collected rn just like toww was when you first meet him #but oh my gods later he is gonna lose his SHIT and it's gonna be great #an angry Narinder is not a Narinder you want to mess with #I'm having too much fun with this AU #too much opportunity for angst and comedy than I can resist #reincarnation au #I will think of a snappy name certainly #also the crown being a bird feels strangely fitting

[vermillioncrown]

i can't talk about specifics bc too detailed, but tldr:

everyone started off w saying the presentation was good

my advisor actually called my presentation "immaculate"

answered every question to the point we had off-the-books (not for corrections, but for curiosity) discussion

holy fucking shit i was standing for three hours straight (1 h 50 m non-stop verm infodump lmao, then 1 h of closed questioning, and then another 10-20 m of committee deliberation)

(to put into scope: defense presentations should aim to be 60-75 mins at most and 15 min questions)

(everyone agreed it actually needed the whole time bc of the sheer scale of the work)

the committee all agreed that the work is a very big contribution w immense practicality to the field

i just need to finish the document, add their suggested corrections, and that's fucking it 😎😎😎😎😎

=====

what does that mean for fanfic?

well. i need to prioritize my corrections bc uh lol my job deadline is by the end of the month

but i think i'll have enough bandwidth to be creative again, so likely i'll be writing and noodling as i make those corrections, so no promises but we'll see if anything gets posted

#academic jerky #redglyphs #i have my Preferred/Precise Hill to Die on 🎺🎺🎺🎺 #last night i felt like i was going to fucking die from anxiety #i see it really depends on the person bc i know some ppl (a lot of my friends) felt so dead afterwards #i feel like i could fight a god and rip their dick off rn #like holy shit. holy fucking shit i made it! #no one has to call me dr verm tho...i'm just some guy (affectionate) to you all and i like it that way

[utilitycaster]

I've gotten a couple replies of "and that's terrifying" on this post about the more stable members of Bells Hells, and, to be honest, hate that, so let's talk about it.

There's a couple reasons. The first that I still don't know who the fuck thought the Issylra half of the party split would be Team Levelheaded and not Team Abandonment Issues, because, well, it's the latter. The second is that there's been a near constant undercurrent from quite early in the campaign of "oh Orym...he's going to break...he's a powder keg" and while he's decidedly not a powder keg, we did get him finally breaking a bit, and suddenly everyone's like "HORRIFYING that the guy I kept claiming was uniquely angsty is now having a harder time with the party split than the other characters whose equally tragic backstories I've consistently ignored, diminished, and dismissed."

All three of the Bells Hells characters in Team Issylra have issues related to loneliness and being left behind, which is a common thread through the party, but notably, Fearne, FCG, and Chetney being more stable should not be surprising nor scary. Resilience isn't tied to whether or not you're somewhat chaotic, or have mechanically-induced loss of control, and that's what we're talking about here. The reason why Team Issylra is having a rough time of it - and specifically why Laudna and Orym are falling apart whereas Ashton is doing comparatively well - is because they've been constantly pretending things are okay. Chetney, meanwhile, genuinely does think the worst thing that happened to him fucking rules, and has the age and perspective and sheer survival instincts to pull through; FCG has, within the story, had to face some horrifying realizations about himself and so has some tools for this kind of situation; and Fearne is to be honest still learning that consequences are a thing that happens, but she has dealt with a few profound disappointments and is sitting with them - she openly admitted she's not terribly impressed by her parents.

On the other hand, I think Orym has worked through the earlier stages of grief, to be sure, but he's put a brave face on over it and tried to look at the bright side. Which isn't the worst idea, but it means when the things he's built that idea of a bright side upon - Keyleth's infallibility, his relationships within the Crown Keepers - are nowhere to be found, he doesn't have anything to take hold of. He adjusted to one devastating change by clinging to the constants, and now that many of the constants are gone too, he has no mechanism to process the change in their absence.

And this is Laudna's whole deal, right? I do in fact agree that her initial death was still the worst thing that's happened to her so far, but that doesn't mean she can't still be incredibly upset by major events. It's comforting to know you've survived worse, but it doesn't necessarily help you actually get through a slightly less terrible (but still pretty terrible) situation. She says she can't stop compartmentalizing or she'll cry - but like, she'd probably feel better if she'd just spent the second watch crying. Like Orym, Laudna's developed this idea that she can will things into being okay, and in the end, she can't. Leaning into the "Today SUCKS" attitude would, honestly, help her, and I'm hoping she does so.

Ashton meanwhile doesn't have healthy coping mechanisms, but they do have coping mechanisms that work in this situation (namely, drinking and hitting things). He also, more importantly, has no investment in pretending things are okay. Ashton thinks the world is full of utter bullshit that will fuck you over, and the point is to get through it, and sure, it's a very cynical mindset, but there's a reason why toxic positivity is, well, toxic.

As a sidebar, I also think that Ashton has, fascinatingly and despite their drunken talk with Laudna on the skyship, put their abandonment issues into perspective. Ashton is able to handle the current situation because, logically, they were teleported to a random location beyond their control and with no capacity to contact other people, so it's reasonable to assume the other half of the party is in the same position. No one abandoned anyone. To quote Ashton themself, actually, from episode 25, "Sometimes shit's just fucked up, and the only thing you can do because you didn't do anything fucking wrong, is get the fuck back up and do the exact same thing all over again knowing that there was nothing to learn." On the other hand, the fact that Milo saved Ashton makes that particular situation worse. If Ashton had been left to die in the street and a random uninvolved stranger picked him up? Then you can at least imagine the Nobodies had to leave, or couldn't pick them up for whatever reason, or even perished themselves. The fact that Milo was able to make this choice means the Nobodies also had the ability to make a choice, and the choice was to leave them behind, and that's what stings, and that's the unique loneliness, and that's why this situation isn't comparable.

So anyway, in summary, it's unsurprising the two people who have handled grief and tragedy by trying to quietly (in Orym's case) and not-so-quietly (in Laudna's) smooth it over are finding themselves completely unable to do so and barely holding together, whereas the people who allow themselves to be upset or, frankly, just go apeshit, are doing much better.

#critical role #critical role spoilers #bells hells #Ashton (and Deni$e) are honestly reminding me of the Yasha pit fight in C2 rn #like was that a healthy coping mechanism no but Yasha honestly did feel much better after it and her recovery trajectory went up from there #and ashton has the other dimension of like. he has chronic pain. it's unfair and serves no purpose. shit happens. #it's very they should invent a way out that isn't through but unfortunately they didn't so fuck it i'm smashing the wall #i mean barbarian rage as catharsis isn't a new idea by any stretch but. the thing about a reckless attack is it feels good as hell

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

Just to minimize my chances of being genuinely misunderstood OR deliberately misinterpreted, and crucified for something I don't think, How Dare You Say We Piss on the Poor website etc...I'm gonna say this right up top. I absolutely understand why people don't like Thessaly as a character, if anyone does completely unironically stan her as some kind of feminist hero who Did Nothing Wrong uwu, I personally see it as a bit of a red flag. I don't like terfs real or fictional. In a vacuum, I could even completely sympathize and agree with the people who want her cut.

HOWEVER.

It's really something to me to see people clamoring for her to be cut, because she carries and expressed an ugly indefensible prejudice (transphobia) in words towards (1) person. Meanwhile Hob fucking Gadling enacted one of the most violent forms of antiblack racism I can even think of against thousands no, millions of people, the ripple effects of which still affect billions more today. Just a little light idk, profiting off the fucking slave trade and had to be told by someone else that it was bad...and he's a fan favorite.

People are saying Thessally being Dream's love interest reflects badly on him or is somehow endorsement by the narrative (?!?!?!?!?!? Didn't she (SPOILER ALERT AS IF IT MATTERS BY NOW) help participate in his extended assisted suicide? She's not painted as a great person to me just another character what are y'all SMOKING whatever fine. It's fine this is fine.) But shipping Dream with Mr. Former Slaver is not only not verboten or frowned on widely in the fandom but its THEE most popular pairing by far. So...why the difference?

Like where are the same fans who are saying Thessaly shouldn't just be more clearly shown to be wrong, she shouldn't even be in the show at all when it comes to Hobert's crimes??? Yes, transphobia is indefensible. Isn't racism?

And I hear the cries of "it's fiction!!!" Already rallying (if anyone who needs to hear this even sees it lol) to which I say:

HORSESHIT. I KNOW you don't, deep down, really agree because if you did, why get upset about Thessaly being included??? Why does what she said to one person matter if it's Just Fiction You Guyze. Fictional characters are allowed to do bad things and fiction isn't reality sweaty....except when you only apply that standard to fictional racists you like and simp for, but fictional transphobes you don't are SO HARMFUL they shouldn't even be portrayed in fiction.

Like. Give me a big fat BREAK. This looks like bullshit, no? I'm sorry, but I'd love for someone to try and give any other explanation besides one personally offended you or hit home for you, and the other doesn't.

And if that bothers you or you feel like it says something negative about you...idk what you want me to say??? You can't control how other people perceive you and that's how people outside this majority-of-the-fandom bubble see it. You don't need to respond, I just wish and genuinely hope this gives you a moment to think about why fans who ARE bothered by both (and not just paying lip service to being bothered by the one but railing against the other) are so frustrated with people saying everyone is welcome but in practice only bending over backwards for the comfort and emotions of themselves, and people they can easily relate to.

You don't have to like Thessaly (I don't. I find her an interesting antagonist, I don't stan her. And frankly that's not the point of her character) but you'll pardon me for feeling more than a bit cynical and side eying people's motivations for what seems a...pretty obvious double standard, on what fictional crimes related to real world issues matter to y'all, and which clearly don't. Either actually bring the same energy to the table for fictional people who committed atrocities, even if against a group you're not part of and thus don't feel the need to empathize with, or just carry on, but accept that you don't have the SLIGHTEST room to talk about cutting characters who do immoral things. And you also need to accept that you look like a hypocrite when you do.

#thessaly #wanda the sandman #hob gadling #I could've cried sexism!!! Problematic Male vs Female Characters except 1) I don't actually think that's the main reason *here* #2) there are WAY better examples of that particular double standard in this fandom #also i can admit when I'm a bit of a hypocrite or was. #i used to dip my toes into the dreamling stuff too early on #but idk. It just got too sour seeing ppl whitewash (lol I know I'm a comedian) #what he did over and over. And I genuinely had started to wonder #if the show hadn't included that particular crime and I'd just imagined it from the comics because #my memory is shit sometimes and I guess I was naive. I *wanted* to believe someone would talk aboutit #if it had made it in. but ultimately i went back and checked and no #and seeing how the whole fandom behaving affected my non-white mutuals some of whom... #like these are my friends man or ppl I just respect and I can't just. Ignore their feelings and their pov #and act like they werent making points or it doesn't matter #like it's all just fun and games for everyone on the same terms. And seeing how easy it was #for everyone to ignore was so unsettling. I couldn't keep pretending it was just fiction and didn't affect anyone real #Call me a bully a t3rf apologist (fuck you and for the record. no) #a puritan or a Fancop (actually stop comparing #people disagreeing with you online to what cops do. For fucks sake you just make it look like nothing is really real to you outside fandom) #whatever man. Whatever helps you sleep. I'm just gonna block you #if you're clearly sticking your fingers in your ears. engaging with you is a waste of time and energy then #Hell I have sympathy for anyone who doesn't like thessaly #especially trans fans. Especially rn. But lbr that sympathy for a lot of the white trans/queer fans only goes one way!!! #never gets extended to anyone else's issues. Like THATSthe issue. And it's shitty! #(sorry this post is not about me in the confessional lol that's why I put this at the bottom #I just had feelings to get out and yes its my blog but i didn't want to clog the airways)

[bootyful-seventeen]

Oh gosh okay so I went back to marinating more on long haired Jihoon, but specifically long haired Jihoon getting pegged has me chewing on the bars of my enclosure to get out

Like just think of how pretty he'd look when he's on all fours and your fucking into him!! His chest blushed and heaving from how needy he is for you and the way your touch just feels so good and electric running along your skin! Your fingers then threading through his hair to pull his head up to see his thoroughly fucked out and flushed face in the mirror you placed in front of the bed. His eyes rolling back into his skull as cute little whimpers and cries slip from his lips when you brush your lips along his shoulder and licking up his neck before nibbling on his earlobe. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh and even the louder moans he'd make if you gripped his cheeks in your hands and pounded him into the mattress, his back arching so nicely that you can't help but run a hand up his spine and wrap his long hair around your fist while he trembled underneath you whimpering about how he's gonna cum. Your eyes dropping down to watch his slick hole swallowing your strap on with ease from being played with for so long before getting bent over. Jihoon's whines getting louder from hand slipping between his thighs to jerk off his leaky cock until he's releasing spurts onto the sheets under him. Tears springing from his eyes as you fuck him at a harder and faster pace until he was left gasping for air, his thighs shaking from keeping his ass up when your strap slips out of his trembling hole and a relieved smile on his face as you cooed about how good he was for you, and how he looks so pretty all fucked out like this between kisses along his spine

#seventeen smut #woozi smut #jihoon smut #i'm sorry i'm back in my geto jihoon thoughts of him with some long hair. like long ass hair like him and this started cuz #i saw a post on ig from the alley saying that they'll have more jjk merch coming soon and i really wanna get the keychains #especially since my slutty little toji is included too like oh my god #but yeah i think i might be good enough to try writing again but bit by bit #mostly cuz the ways i've been coping with stress and anxiety hasn't been as effective but writing this has helped me calm down a bit #and get me focused on something else cuz i've had too many peer reviews that i think i should probably get assessed by a doctor soon #but yee ya girl sammy is making baby steps of a return rn since writing this didn't feel draining at all and it made me so happy!!! #this shit has me feeling like austin powers when he got his mojo back lmaooooo #m:jihoon

[akuma-tenshi]

this is my truth

#feeling real soft and nostalgic rn so i might as well post this #confession: skylanders was the first fandom i ever interacted with #but the only game i ever cared about was trap team #i latched onto stampy's playthrough when i was like ten and it has been my comfort letsplay ever since #i'm rewatching his playthrough and every time wolfgang is onscreen i still kinda lose my shit a little #i stand by this btw. the only way you could make me enjoy these four more is if they were women #am i biased?? yes. i'm a lesbian leave me alone #also three of them are villains i think that says a lot about me and my taste in characters #rambling #skylanders #skylanders trap team #how the FUCK do i tag these characters #i'm just not gonna. fuck you

[scn-thedog]

ACTUALLY n and uzi don't kiss because they're both asexual and don't like kissing, so fuck you *everyone in the room explodes*

#murder drones #//;VERY /J !!!!! #uzi doorman #serial designation n #nuzi #biscuitbites #//;no actually i'm half joking i don't want them ro kiss because i feel like everyone wants them to kiss to prove they're legitimate #//;and that leaves a baf taste in my mouth but i'm probably making shit up rn

[moonliithe]

Shoving everything currently going on with MHA in a box for just a moment, I just want to put it out there that I still need want to know how the Captain Hero manga fucking ended

#afo #all for one #yoichi shigaraki #ofa #shigaraki brothers #like i'm not even asking about hisashi anymore (for now) #what was in those other volumes #crumbs of information on the shigaraki brothers' psychology through the vehicle of shitty manga come to me pls #like i know they are evaporating and shit but it's imperative i know as much as possible of what made Yoichi like _that_ #mha spoilers #not really but just in case #i'm sure nobody else is thinking abt this specific part of lore rn with all going on lmao but i can't help ittt #feral shigaraki bros aka AFO AND OFA based their mha world shaping/changing dreams on that bitch ass manga #so i feel like its relevant ok #captain hero manga

[stuckinapril]

i really am the kind of bitch who loves reading textbooks huh

#not to be obnoxious but i totally do #i keep saying i don't have time for recreational reading but my biochem textbook? organic chem? physics? psych? chem???? #i WILL get burned out eventually. i will. but rn i'm having sm fun w my full study days. #absolutely salivating to start sarah bakewell's at the existentialist cafe soon #a stack is sitting in my bookcase waiting to be read. i miss reading like i used to. i miss it sm #but i just got done w an intense study session and so. much. serotonin #i've just been studying and working out and taking walks and applying my lip balm and spritzing on a yummy perfume and vibing to music #and. as always. minding my own fucking business #studying and consuming knowledge is actually part of my self care routine. if i don't i feel like utter shit #someone talk science w me i would literally fall in love w u #p

[hjartasalt]

You really do just shave your face one time and suddenly you're stuck in an endless cycle of shaving your face for the rest of your life huh

#I don't feel like shaving rn #but I also didn't shave yesterday cause I was lazy and now I have visible stubble and I know I'll feel better afterwards #see on one hand I'm happy cause gender euphoria #but on the other hand it's so little it looks like shit if I don't shave it

[rapidhighway]

if i could stop relying on food for regulating my emotional state that would be so awesome man

#struggling rn #im very bad idk im just upset rn but I'm trying to unlearn it but i also know i would feel so much better if i ate something sweet #but i will feel like shit later so ughh #food mention #food cw #im doing much much better than before anyway but still like every week or two weeks i have to fight myself and for whahhttt

[pmatga]

so here's my latest pmatga idea

bitter exes: old man edition™

#sir cumference #buttler #delbert heinbech #<- my hc name for butler #pmatga #pac man and the ghostly adventures #my art #btw this is supposed to take place during 'seems like old times' when sir c's being held captive in betrayus' throne room #bc (if i'm remembering correctly) that's the only time these two are ever in the same location together in the show #also bc i don't think i've ever mentioned it before: i personally hc sir c's first name as clarence #bc clarence cumference sounds funny to me #also also look. there's just something Very Funny to me abt *these two* in particular + #+ having a 'dated decades ago; had an incredibly messy break-up; have hated each other ever since' dynamic with each other #the friendliest old guy on pacworld & the most conflict-averse old guy in the netherworld have relationship drama that's old enough to drin #not even over the war or anything either; it's just normal break-up shit #also also also yea dr b & betrayus are (technically) here too. i just. didn't feel like drawing them rn lmao #just pretend they're in the background somewhere having a Live Slug Reaction moment