#I don’t hate the 2015 show for the record

[alexisntedgy]

rewatching the muppets (2015) is so funny because I’ll be like “oh I remember there are some rlly funny bits actually!! it had so much potential!” and then I watch it and just go

“gonzo has. gonzo has parents? what is this universe because that would solve a lot of questions and character points that I actually don’t want to be solved”

“aw yeah no walter :( he’d be so sad he wasn’t in this”

“pls don’t be a misogynist like that *character I love*”

“I HAD ALMOST MANAGED TO BLOCK OUT THE FACT THEY TRIED TO STRAIGHTIFY SCOOTER”

“sAM AND J A N I C E ?!”

#the whole show feels like a tug of war between writers and concepts to me #like some people knew these characters and some people didn’t and just wanted drama for the abc viewers #*sigh* american television #I don’t hate the 2015 show for the record #like it is funny and gave piggy so many cool character moments that she needed #and it was made during a time when lgbt characters were just starting to be prioritised on television #so bunsen and beaker could just exist and be gay a bit more bluntly #scooter could gay panic. pepe could be bi #but they messed up on a few levels #can u tell I have thoughts #but this is mostly a ghosts blog so I’ll hush now #the muppets #the muppets 2015 #the muppets abc #muppets

[siryouarebeingmocked]

Carter and Lovecraft, by Jonathan L. Howard (2015)

I really wanted to like this book.

I've read a few Lovecraft novels and stories, and I liked them. So when I saw this on my friend's bookshelf, I borrowed it, and read it.

Tried to.

The first real fly in the ointment? NYPD protag sees his partner take a 9mm retirement in front of him on a creepy case, and becomes a private detective. Mysterious lawyer shows up at his office one day and says there was a bookstore owner in Providence, Rhode Island, who has been missing and just declared dead.

The protag gets the bookshop. He's not sure why.

Protag goes to the bookshop. Owner's niece, Emily, is there. She's been running the shop alone since the owner vanished, and she co-ran it when he was alive. Also, she's biracial. Would be played by Zoe Kravitz in the movie, he thinks.

Her name is Lovecraft.

As in, she's a descendant of ol' Howard Philips.

She notes the irony; a black-ish "mulatto" descendant of an anti-black racist.

"Okay," I think, as I checked the publication date. "You've gotten that token bit out of the way. Now, can we move on?"

Apparently not.

As protag starts looking into the disappearance and other weird stuff, he decides he needs to get his eye in. So he goes to a gun range, where he needs to sign up for the NRA first

and ends the session by "re-engaging the safety" on his Glock.

Fun fact: stock Glocks don't have manual safeties, AFAIK.

In the next chapter, protag thinks about how he used the gun. He hates the NRA and the whole "gun fetish" thing, but he needs the iron, just in case.

Two strikes. Three if you count the safety thing.

Yes, I know an NYPD cop might be a bit bigoted about the issue, especially considering how his partner died. But it really feels like the writer's opinion.

In fact, let me just-

Yep. The writer is British. This sounds awfully familiar.

It was about this time that I realized something. The protagonist has no traits that aren't directly related to being a cop or detective. Absolutely none.

I don't think we know what he does in his off hours. No friends. Nothing but the job.

Heck, Miss Lovecraft has more personality than him, and she takes up a lot less screen time.

Protag decides to give Lovecraft half the business, so he can become a silent partner. People start dying in physically impossible ways - like the dude who drowned in his dry car in a parking lot - our hero looks into it.

He also ends up learning about a local family, the Waites. Rich, keep to themselves on their own land, been around since before the area was officially settled, apparently.

The local who tells him about all this says the younger ones are oddly attractive. The family has distinctive big eyes.

Anyone remotely familiar with HP Lovecraft just went "Oh, right, they're fishmen. Got it." I've seen this trope done better before, like in the comic Shadowgirls.

Hero looks into the archives, finds records of a racist Town Council rant by an early Waite, back when they were still into trading. Including slaves. Specifically, patriarch Newton Waite went to a council meeting and said black people should serve others, and shouldn't have self-determination.

The archivist intern says it's was "a different time", and that's just how people were back then.

Of course, he adds "People who talk like that now - no pass for them."

End scene.

Like this extremely mainstream, boring opinion is some kind of

In the next scene, protag chats about the fit he had near the Waite place. Learns about another mysterious death. When he chats about it with Emily, he suddenly realizes she's hot.

Then the narration tells us that he was a racist bigot in his teens, though he thought he was being sensible at the time. He now knows he was wrong, but he still feels sparks of it when he reads about some black kid doing some stereotypically black thing, which gives certain white people "a hard-on of righteousness".

And, of course, his time spent walking away from "instinctive racism" means his dating pool opened up. Like Emily Lovecraft, for example.

The most stereotypically black thing would probably be crime. Or being a single mom or deadbeat dad.

 Sadly, I know of plenty of black people - from my black majority home country - who fall into one of those categories. Or two. Three if you include "poverty", but we're Developing, so that barely even counts.

Also, this basically came out of nowhere. Not Emily being hot - I mean, look at Zoe Kravitz - but his unsolicited thoughts on racism.

All of these issues have also been issues for many concerned black people. For decades. The 'stereotypically black things' might be bad themselves, not because they make racist white people feel smug.

This is precisely where I closed the book for good. I would've put away the bookmarks, but I needed the page so I could write this rant.

Honestly, writing all this made me realize that I should've given up long before I made it halfway through the book. But I just kept hoping it would get better.

Doing the same well-worn cliches in a modern setting doesn't really make them interesting. Neither do the little 'racism is bad, mmmkay?' bits.

#books #personal #lovecraft #long

[magxit]

Just dropped: https://twitter.com/rollingstone/status/1663660316817780745?s=46&t=Jv7EvC8oVb-dKk_gHc29yQ

I haven’t read the full thing. But kinda sad when the media gets it more so than her own fans…

We Wouldn’t Be Having This Conversation If Taylor Swift Was a Man

Publicity stunt or not, Swift can have a sleazeball summer if she damn well pleases.

ON THE FINAL night of Taylor Swift’s MetLife shows this weekend, 80,000 Swifties screamed in the swamps of New Jersey for over three hours. They wore outfits from every era — tinsel fringe dresses, serpent arm cuffs, and heart-shaped sunglasses. I saw countless faces in cowboy hats similar to the emoji — only these cowboys were sobbing uncontrollably while eating foot-long hotdogs. And the bracelets! They were all wearing beaded bracelets coded in Swiftian lyrics, trading them in the parking lot like Deadheads swapping grilled cheeses. (Take my advice: do not try to pay for the bracelets. They will look at you like you’re from outer space.) 

It’s hard to believe that while this magical Eras tour is happening — and while Swift is somehow reaching previously-unimaginable heights of popularity, surpassing even the ludicrous highs of 2015 — she is also experiencing a backlash from some corners of the Swiftie community over her supposed new boyfriend, the 1975’s Matt Healy. 

Their sentiments were best summed up in an open letter on Twitter using the hashtag #SpeakUpNow (named after Swift’s upcoming re-recording of her 2010 album), which states that Healy’s many controversies “deeply trouble” them. “From engaging in racist remarks, making offensive jokes, and admitting to watching degrading pornography in which people of color are being humiliated and assaulted, his actions contribute to the perpetuation of hate, stereotypes, and objectification, which targets and hurts some people from the Jewish, Black, Chinese, Hawaiian, Inuit, LGBTQ+ communities, as well as women.”

The statement refers to the derogatory comments Healy made about the rapper Ice Spice on The Adam Friedland Show podcast in February and the questionable apology he delivered onstage last month. Fans raised eyebrows when Swift recruited the rapper for her “Karma” remix last week, and on Monday, Healy finally addressed the controversy in a New Yorker profile that only exacerbated the issue. He explained that the whole thing “doesn’t actually matter” and that the backlash he received was merely virtue signaling: “It’s just people going, ‘Oh, there’s a bad thing over there, let me get as close to it as possible so you can see how good I am,’” he said. “And I kind of want them to do that, because they’re demonstrating something so base level.”

If you didn’t catch this quote aggregated on the internet about 137 times (you probably had better things to do than scroll Twitter and hustle children for their handmade bracelets), you aren’t missing much. This is all part of Healy’s artistry: an intricate, tangled web of bits intended to rile you up and piss you off. This is the guy who eats raw meat onstage, gives Nazi salutes, and delivers intelligent observations like, “I’m obsessed with my dick for some reason.” Stupid Shit is his brand. Are we really supposed to take anything he says seriously? 

I’m not here to answer that, but I am here to tell you that none of it is Taylor’s problem. For the last 17 years, we’ve held this woman responsible for the actions of men she chooses to spend time with, and it’s time to stop. It would be fair to criticize her for walking out of Electric Lady with the ghost of Pol Pot or wondering why her dad and Matt Lauer are grooving out to her performance of “22.” But this is just a hot sleazeball who wants Oasis back together (I don’t know about you, but I’ve dated a lot of guys who fit that description), and it’s up to Taylor to spend her time as she pleases.

[beautifulpersonpeach]

I know you hate that discourse but I was hoping you'd talk more about vocals scandals happening lately BPP.

***

I’ve got four asks sitting in my inbox about it that annoy me every time I see them. The only reason I’ve not deleted them yet is because two writers aren’t anonymous, and they clearly took time to write it so I’ll eventually respond after I figure out how to say what I want to say succinctly and with as little attitude as possible.

The one thing I’ll say about that discourse now, is that the fact it’s encore performances - encores that only happen after idols have spent 12 to 16 hours shooting comeback stages back to back, sometimes for a solid week, and so is most gruelling for performance-focused groups - that it’s encore stages that k-pop stans have decided is the benchmark of vocal ability, this in itself is one reason why I simply cannot take k-pop stans and this discourse seriously.

And this is aside the fact that any performance is scrutinized as though there’s a conspiracy to ‘trick’ fans about live singing. I mean, if BTS’s 2015 cover of Perfect Man happened in the current k-pop climate, there would be several posts on all social media platforms about how HYBE is ‘secretly post-editing’ their performance to give the impression they are live singing… when in reality it’s just a pre-recorded live vocal performance, something that’s standard for *any* music show stage.

Like, it’s only in the mind of a k-pop stan that this discourse has any legs to stand on.

But yeah, when I say k-pop stans literally have no idea what they’re talking about and that the people most eager to engage in ‘discourse’ over any group are people who already don’t like the subject, the vocals discourse is one of the best cases in point.

I’ll eventually answer those questions when I’m more in the mood to deal with them.

#kpop #kpop vocals #quick asks #le sserafim #BTS #kpop discourse

[jencsi]

A broody D.B Russell is a mood-

Straightened hair, it's been this way for months, even before we got here, I wondered why you did it, is it for him? Were you bored of the curls? You look better with them. 

The doctors keep telling me it's not wise to have two people wasting away here. I disagree. 

We messed up Jules, I messed up. 

I don’t think you hate me, I know you hate me.

Julie Finlay, born March 20th, 1968, in Philadelphia Pennsylvania. “In west Philadelphia born and raised...” Okay I’m sorry, I know you hate that song.

Blue eyes, blonde hair, 5’3, a mirror image of Catherine Willows no less. 

Thirty-five bruises, twenty two percent blood loss, a dozen staples, fifteen stitches, two transfusions, one scar across your forehead, the chunk of skull they fixed won’t show, so they say, drains, tubes, breathing on your own is a good thing, they can shock hearts, why not brains back to life?

Monthly charge- $2500. Interest- $800. Paid in full- March 15th 2015. Invoice complete. Receipt sent to Diebenkorn Russell. Card ending in 4879. 

I met Jules in May of 1994, Charlie wasn’t even born yet, can you believe that kiddo? 

Your eyes responded to light today, I could have swore your arm moved when they did it but the nurse didn’t see it. She must think I’m crazy. 

Power of attorney file, client confidentiality, password protect, BloodGirl528, crap, no, it’s Agnes, there we go, please advise, December 2014, in the event of a life-threatening injury, please refer all medical decisions to one Diebenkorn Russell and his wife Barbara, Las Vegas Nevada. You knew before I did Jules. 

“Baby if I could, change the world” You are the sunlight in my universe” damn this Clapton guy. 

Las Vegas reached a near record high of 95 today. That high pressure system will remain in place for the rest of the week. Folks, be sure to stay hydrated out there. 

Grandpa, when is Aunt Julie coming back from her trip? I need to tell her a secret.

Invoice complete. Payment received April 15th 2015. Card ending in 4879. 

A fever, you spiked a fever today, low grade, 100.1. April 20th 2015. Could be nothing, could be something. 

They had a funeral for Dan up in Seattle. I felt bad because none of us could be there for him but Kerri’s still healing, you’re here, I’m here…

One of the nurses had a birthday, they got pizza for her, I figured if you could smell it from down the hall, maybe you would wake up. 

She wouldn’t want to stay like this forever. How do you know what she wants? Me? What about you? What makes you so sure? Do you think you know her better than you know me? 

We are gathered here today, no that sounds like a wedding speech, damn, none of us want to gather for this….

Stop. 

D.B, you have a phone call, it's Ely State, they want to talk to you about the court date for Winthrop’s trial. “I’m not taking the stand Conrad, and we’re not presenting a single shred of our evidence unless Jules is with us, make the bastard wait in state pen a little while longer.”

“Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones” Proverbs 16:24. 

“I guess I can put two and two together. "Sometimes the answer's four," I said, "and sometimes it's twenty-two...” 

Stan’s Floral’s. Sunset Blvd. 702-...... 

The judge isn’t going to extend the waiting period any longer, he says I need to be ready to present my findings by May twentieth with or without a blood spatter expert. 

“I’ll be ready,” she rasps to him jokingly, eyes bright, smile meek but present "four days, that’s plenty of time.”

“Coma notwithstanding,” he bites back, soul on fire, fingers on her wrist, feeling her pulse, needing to be sure she was palpable, alive. 

Boy did he miss this. 

#db russell #julie finlay #just thoughts I can't get out into a full fic #ramblings #post coma things #csi cbs #writing #its getting better #but still not where I want it to be

[gemmajcmes]

Listen to the This is Gemma playlist.

Gemma Whitney James, also known by her mononymous stage name Gemma, is an American singer, songwriter, producer, and actress. Born July 1, 1998 in Atlanta, Georgia to Kimberly and Derek James - the CEO and founders of Kingdom Records. While she is most known for her successful music career, in the sister duo and later as a solo artist, she also has some acting experience under her belt. Her upcoming fourth studio album is set to be released march 31, 2023... // @nepofminspo

DISCOGRAPHY - genre: r&b, pop

APPEARS ON

Mistaken - Libianca ft. Oxlade & Gemma

Honey - BJ The Chicago Kid ft. Gemma

Princess Cut - Offset ft. Gemma

Woman of the Year - Calvin Harris (with Stefflon Don, Gemma & Coi Leray)

you & me - Gunna, Gemma

Hello - Fivio Foreign ft. Gemma & KayCyy

Leak It - Ari Lennox ft. Gemma

SINGLES & EPS

gemma x winnie

Do It - remix

Who Knew (for “Grown-ish”)

Thinking Bout Me (for “Grown-ish”)

Grown (”Grown-ish” theme)

Insecure (for “Insecure” soundtrack)

Warrior (for “A Wrinkle In Time” soundtrack)

Shine Bright (for “Trolls” soundtrack)

Georgia On My Mind (cover)

solo

Deeper

LMK

Have Mercy

Treat Me

Surprise

For The Night

Freak Like Me (spotify singles cover)

Feeling Good (cover)

One of Them Days

Cancelled

Movin

Forfeit

No Takebacks

Labels

Can I

Bouncin’

Heavy

If You Hate Me

None For You

ALBUMS

IN PIECES (march 2023)

Someone’s Calling (Gemma)

Pray It Away - lead single

Body Do

I Don’t Mind

Worried

Fallin 4 U

How Does It Feel

Feel Me Cry

Make It Look Easy

Looze U

Told Ya (feat. Missy Elliot)

Cheatback (feat. Future)

Heart On My Sleeve

In Pieces 

THE OTHER SIDE (2021)

Bodies - Intro

Pick Up Your Feelings

Put It Down

Lost One

The Other Side

Girl Like Me

Fairplay

Mad At Me

Get In The Way

Wicked Games

Ex

Show Love

Shame

Take It All

Tragic - deluxe track

Hurt Me So Good - deluxe track

Roster - deluxe track

Selfish - deluxe track

UNGODLY HOUR (gemma x winnie, 2019)

Intro

Forgive Me

Baby Girl

Tipsy

Do It

Ungodly Hour

Busy Boy

Catch Up

Overwhelmed

Lonely

Don’t Make It Harder On Me

Wonder What She Thinks Of Me

ROYL

Hazy - deluxe chrome edition

80/20 - deluxe chrome edition

THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT (debut album, gemma x winnie, 2015)

The Kids Are Alright

Hi Lo

Everywhere

Falala - interlude

Fake

Baptize

Down

Galaxy

Happy Without Me

Baby Bird

Cool People

If God Spoke

Drop

Fall

-----------------------------------------------------

FILMOGRAPHY CREDITS

Swarm (2023) as Marissa Jackson, 5 episodes

Amazon Prime limited series

A young woman’s obsessed with a pop star takes a dark turn.

Praise This (2023) as Sam

Peacock original movie

Youth choirs gather together for a music competition

Grown-ish (2018 - 2021) as Jazz Forster, seasons 1 - 3

2x Emmy nominated for Outstanding Cinematography for Single-Camera Series

3x NAACP Image Award nominated for Outstanding Comedy Series

Last Holiday (2006) as Angie

8 years old

Fighting Temptations (2003) as Little Lily

first acting role at 5 years old

APPEARANCES AS HERSELF

That’s My Jam s2, ep6 (2023)

competition of musical games

The Hair Tales s1, ep 6 “deeply rooted” (2022)

Documentary. About Black women, beauty and identity through the distinctive lens of Black hair.

NAACP Image Award nominated for Outstanding News/Information (Series or Special)

SNL (2019, 2021)

as musical guest

#𝐖𝐇𝐘 𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐁𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐈 𝐃𝐎┇career

[niamflopped]

By Neil McCormick, Music Critic, The Daily Telegraph

9 November 2022

“Do you mind if I smoke?” asks Louis Tomlinson, tapping cigarette ash into an empty Coke bottle. “The modern man smokes a vape, apparently. But I still smoke ciggies. I’m a judgemental fucker, and I hate vapers.”

The former One Direction boyband star certainly does like a cigarette, getting through half a dozen during an hour-long encounter in a hotel boardroom that reeks of stale tobacco.  “Maybe I drink too much for a singer. Maybe I smoke too much for a singer. But it can be quite demanding, this life. So, for me to have those little vices, it’s important.”

Scruffily unshaven, in gym wear and trainers, the 30-year-old hops up to open a window, while chatting away in a friendly and engaged manner. “I never really chose this life,” he insists, with a strong Doncaster accent (though he lives in Hertfordshire now). “I auditioned for X Factor and crossed me fingers. And now, here I am.”

In 2010, at the age of 18, Tomlinson and four other young hopefuls (Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Liam Payne and Zayn Malik) were assembled into a boyband mentored by entertainment impresario Simon Cowell. Although they didn’t win the talent show, their impish appeal saw them rise to become the most successful manufactured group of the modern era, achieving levels of fan mania comparable to the early days of The Beatles.

Together for five frenzied years, 1D have scored four number one albums, sold more than 200 million records worldwide, notched up over 21 billion streams, won seven BRIT awards and their final tour in 2015 grossed over $200  million (£173 million) in revenue. For a time, Tomlinson’s floppy fringe adorned teenage bedrooms all over the planet. There was considerable hysteria when 1D said they were taking a “hiatus”, citing exhaustion.

Tomlinson was the oldest member (two years Styles’s senior) with the shakiest voice but adored by fans for his genuine smile, wacky fashions and undisguised pleasure at being part of the gang.

Styles had a cheeky swagger, Malik was the sensuous R&B singer, Horan the folkie-next-door, whilst Payne was a cocky Jack the lad (whose solo career has been a bit of a washout). As time went by, Tomlinson shed insecurities to get more involved in songwriting, helping push 1D’s pop rock side.

His second solo album, Faith in the Future (out on Friday) dials up the guitars, building on his chart-topping 2020 solo debut album Walls, inspired by Britpop and indie, the music of his pre-fame youth. It is not a sound you would particularly associate with 1D. “I don’t relate to right-down-the-middle pop,” he admits. “But I wouldn’t say that was dumbed down in One Direction. Maybe I dumbed it down myself. Maybe I assumed I couldn’t be exactly who I was.”

Tomlinson was the last of the five members to release an album, and reveals that he was a reluctant solo artist, upset by the band’s decision to separate at the height of their world-beating success in 2016. “It was a bit daunting. I’d just got to a stage where I really started to feel like I found my rhythm, I was enjoying songwriting, I felt like I finally worked out where I am in that band. And then it’s like: ‘Okay, well, now we’re going on a break.’ So there was a bit of petulance from my end, I was frustrated.”

He admits that he has felt competitive with his former bandmates and been jealous of Styles’s enormous solo success. “I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me at first. Only ’cos I didn’t know where to place myself, and really my only point of reference was other members of the band. But it’s not surprising to me that Harry's the most commercially successful because he really fits the mould of a modern star. He’s not just doing music, he’s got film as well, and the (stadium) tour he’s done is unbelievable. It took me a while to work out where I stand. But I look on Harry like a brother, man. I have a lot of pride for what he’s doing.”

He says band members are quietly supportive of each other. “I’m sure the lads will text me when the album comes out, we check in on each other, we’re good like that. I bumped into Niall (Horan) at Glastonbury, and even though we hadn’t spoken all year, it was like absolutely no time had passed. Because we've lived through such experiences together in One Direction, this bond that we have is for life.”

Tomlinson has had other issues to focus on. In 2016, his mother Johannah Deakin, a midwife, died from leukaemia, aged 43. His parents separated when he was a child, and Tomlinson is estranged from his father, a hotel manager.

He has seven younger half-siblings, one of whom, Félicité Tomlinson, died of an accidental drug overdose in 2019. “I’m coping good, man,” he says. “I’m a glass half-full person because what’s the alternative? I’m not saying that there have not been some dark days, because there have. But I had a really lovely upbringing, and my mum was as good as gold.

“Even though she’s not here anymore, I wouldn’t want her to feel guilty for what happened. She wouldn’t want that to define my life and my happiness.”

He also feels a sense of responsibility to his family. “I’m the oldest of all my siblings, and I knew that I had to put on a brave face.”

Nonetheless, Tomlinson, who is also father to a five-year-old son, whom he shares with his ex-girlfriend, confesses wariness when it comes to talking about it. “It carries its own weight emotionally and I’m wanting to escape that because I don’t want people f-----g feeling sorry for me.”

There have been some exceedingly odd aspects to being a boyband superstar. A strand of online fan fiction imagined a passionate affair between Tomlinson and Styles, which was subsequently depicted in a graphic, animated sequence on hit HBO series Euphoria.

Another piece of 1D fanfiction is being adapted for forthcoming movie The Idea of You, starring Anne Hathaway as an older woman having an affair with a boyband star. “It’s weird, all that s---,” tuts Tomlinson, disapprovingly. “But there’s not much you can do about it. I’d rather they didn’t, like, but it is what it is. I won’t be watching it.”

******

Same old, same old

Smokes heavily in interview ✅

Defends and dismisses his smoking and his alcohol consumption, and displays no awareness of their impact on his vocals or general health ✅

Demonstrates jealousy of Harry ✅

Makes sure Larries know he disapproves of them and thinks of Harry as a 'brother', not a boyfriend ✅

Shades Harry, this time by saying he's had 'the most commercial success' when Harry has also had far and away the most critical acclaim too. ✅

Swears heavily ✅

Looks scruffy, dressed in a tracksuit ✅

Asserts that he's Mr Optimism✅

States that he wants a 1d reunion ✅

Doesn't talk in depth about his writing & recording process because other people do that for him ✅

Says he was upset when 1d went on hiatus ✅

New for 9/11/22:

Describes Briana as his ex girlfriend!

#louis tomlinson telegraph #louis tomlinson #harry styles #niall horan #lt2 #zayn #silver tongues #1d reunion #faith in the future

[josiebelladonna]

okay, i officially hate art contests.

you know how yesterday i was saying that ai has cheapened art on pretty much every level possible? well, art contests play a role in that, too. probably a bigger role, tbh, and ai is merely writing its obituary.

i just think of all the contests i’ve ever entered, starting with the science fair in elementary school where my dad and i built a trebuchet together and we all thought that was going to be a slam dunk. our catapult lost out to your stereotypical volcano eruption of cola and mentos. A CATAPULT!

then there was an art contest in middle school, when i entered a cartoon in—i don’t remember what it was exactly but i had drawn a picture full of people in my cartoon style, fresh off the press from the winter before. i lost to the crappiest drawing you’ve ever seen, and i knew there was some favoritism going on there.

then there was soundgarden’s fan art contest in 2016. i entered a drawing of soundgarden themselves into it and i had absolutely no hope for it just from my past experiences. get this: it actually won… but no one on my facebook cared. i think one person liked it, but that was it (this was 2016, too, way before ai came about and ruined everything). the other girl who won got support out the nose. i also hated the prize, too, so figure i distanced myself from the whole thing. what, we put our hard work into this shit and you can’t even be bothered to do better than vinyl records?

then there was chalk on the walk the year before and in 2018. i drew a koi pond in 2015. got bupkis, not even a “thank you”. i drew chris with my heavy metal flowers in 2018. got a bunch of people stopping and taking pictures and asking me questions, but i didn’t even get an honorable mention. i don’t even know who won either year, i don’t even remember them.

i entered my beatles drawings into the state fair in 2018, all four of which i spent hours on. got nothing: i lost to the shittiest drawing of edgar allen poe i had ever seen in my entire life, and i wish i took a picture to show you guys because it really was that godawful.

now here we are with mermay. did all my stuff this year by hand and i’m starting to wonder what the hell is even the point now when it’s obvious they like the clean, digital, disney-ish stuff better. the month isn’t even done yet and i’m starting to feel like a complete idiot for even bothering with it. really, i feel genuinely embarrassed for even attempting it in the first place. i’m just gonna post the remaining ones and then just be done with it, i’m not gonna give a shit about the winners (plus, i’ve been on ig four years now and you’d think, logically, my account has grown by now. fuck me, right?)

i’m thinking of participating in a fashion one for edward gorey’s foundation later this year just to try something different but… now that i write this out, i really, really don’t know and i’m starting to regret even considering it. i have the worst track record with these things and my so-called family and so-called friends wouldn’t give a shit if my life depended on it. i can just see their reactions towards it, too, like “oh, great, here we go again… another contest, another forgone conclusion… get a real job, sweetie”. the people who claim to care about me don’t care at this point. they didn’t care in 2016, and they really don’t care now.

I don’t win contests. i never can, either, simply because of the whole unspoken act of favoritism. you put your heart and soul into a portrait of your dead friend or into four of the four lads from liverpool and you fucking lose to cheapness and amateurness in the worst way possible taken to its dumbest conclusion. they also shortchange artists, too, like the prizes for the chalk on the walk competitions were like gift cards. the soundgarden one had fucking vinyl, not meeting the guys or having a say in the art for the next album or anything awesome like that. just: “here. vinyl”. (worse, they didn’t even tell us what it was until after the fact, so yeah, figure i totally felt used and it left a bad taste in my mouth). because of this, they are very limiting. you can only get away with so much for the sake of the dumbest conclusion you can possibly think of.

art contests are complete bullshit. don’t bother with them if you respect yourself.

#art #art woes #art world #support artists #support a small artist #support the artist #rants #text #art contest

[louisupdates]

Louis Tomlinson on his new album, struggling with fame and a One Direction reunion

The boyband star on his love of rock music, finding his own voice outside of One Direction, losing close family and fame's strangest moments

BY NEIL MCCORMICK (9.11.22)

“Do you mind if I smoke?” asks Louis Tomlinson, tapping cigarette ash into an empty Coke bottle. “The modern man smokes a vape, apparently. But I still smoke ciggies. I’m a judgemental f---er, and I hate vapers.”

He's kidding, but the former One Direction boyband star certainly does like a cigarette, getting through half a dozen during an hour-long encounter in a hotel boardroom that reeks of stale tobacco. “Maybe I drink too much for a singer. Maybe I smoke too much for a singer. But it can be quite demanding, this life. So, for me to have those little vices, it’s important.”

Tomlinson is getting ready for the release this week of his second solo album, Faith in The Future. He seems both nervous and excited. “The lows are lower in a solo career, but the highs are higher,” he suggests. “Because you are not one of 4 or 5 anymore, you have to take full responsibility for everything, so it hits you at both ends.”

Scruffily unshaven, in gym wear and trainers, the 30-year-old hops up to open a window, while chatting away in a friendly and engaged manner. “I never really chose this life,” he insists, with a strong Doncaster accent (though he lives in Hertfordshire now). “I auditioned for X Factor and crossed me fingers. And now, here I am.”

In 2010, at the age of 18, Tomlinson and four other young hopefuls (Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Liam Payne and Zayn Malik) were assembled into a boyband mentored by entertainment impresario Simon Cowell. Although they didn’t win the talent show, their impish appeal saw them rise to become the most successful manufactured group of the modern era, achieving levels of fan mania comparable to the early days of The Beatles.

Together for five frenzied years, 1D have scored four number one albums, sold more than 200 million records worldwide, notched up over 21 billion streams, won seven BRIT awards and their final tour in 2015 grossed over $200  million (£173 million) in revenue. For a time, Tomlinson’s floppy fringe adorned teenage bedrooms all over the planet. There was considerable hysteria when 1D said they were taking a “hiatus”, citing exhaustion.

Tomlinson was the oldest member (two years Styles’s senior) with the shakiest voice but adored by fans for his genuine smile, wacky fashions and undisguised pleasure at being part of the gang. Styles had a cheeky swagger, Malik was the sensuous R&B singer, Horan the folkie-next-door, whilst Payne was a cocky Jack the Lad (whose solo career has been a bit of a washout). As time went by, Tomlinson shed insecurities to get more involved in songwriting, helping push 1D’s pop rock side.

Faith in the Future (out on Friday) dials up the guitars, building on his chart-topping 2020 solo debut album Walls, inspired by Britpop and indie, the music of his pre-fame youth. “I used to spend all my Friday nights in this place called Priory, it was f---ing unbelievable: £10 all you can drink! That’s been banned now. It was in that bar where I fell in love with guitar music.” 

Although he retains a fondness for a big chorus, it is not a sound you would particularly associate with 1D. “I don’t relate to right-down-the-middle pop,” he admits. “But I wouldn’t say that was dumbed down in One Direction. Maybe I dumbed it down myself. Maybe I assumed I couldn’t be exactly who I was.”

Tomlinson was the last of the five members to release an album, and reveals that he was a reluctant solo artist, upset by the band’s decision to separate at the height of their world-beating success in 2016. 

“It was a bit daunting. I’d just got to a stage where I really started to feel like I found my rhythm, I was enjoying songwriting, I felt like I finally worked out where I am in that band. And then it’s like: ‘Okay, well, now we’re going on a break.’ So there was a bit of petulance from my end, I was frustrated.”

He admits that he has felt competitive with his former bandmates and been jealous of Styles’s enormous solo success. 

“I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me at first. Only ’cos I didn’t know where to place myself, and really my only point of reference was other members of the band. But it’s not surprising to me that Harry's the most commercially successful because he really fits the mould of a modern star. 

"He’s not just doing music, he’s got film as well, and the (stadium) tour he’s done is unbelievable. It took me a while to work out where I stand. But I look on Harry like a brother, man. I have a lot of pride for what he’s doing.”

He says band members are quietly supportive of each other. “I’m sure the lads will text me when the album comes out, we check in on each other, we’re good like that. I bumped into Niall (Horan) at Glastonbury, and even though we hadn’t spoken all year, it was like absolutely no time had passed. Because we've lived through such experiences together in One Direction, this bond that we have is for life.”

Tomlinson has had other issues to focus on. In 2016, his mother Johannah Deakin, a midwife, died from leukaemia, aged 43. His parents separated when he was a child, and Tomlinson is estranged from his father, a hotel manager. He has seven younger half-siblings, one of whom, Félicité Tomlinson, died of an accidental drug overdose in 2019. 

“I’m coping good, man,” he says. “I’m a glass half-full person because what’s the alternative? I’m not saying that there have not been some dark days, because there have. But I had a really lovely upbringing, and my mum was as good as gold.

“Even though she’s not here anymore, I wouldn’t want her to feel guilty for what happened. She wouldn’t want that to define my life and my happiness.”

He also feels a sense of responsibility to his family. “I’m the oldest of all my siblings, and I knew that I had to put on a brave face.” Nonetheless, Tomlinson, who is also father to a five-year-old son, whom he shares with his ex-girlfriend, confesses wariness when it comes to talking about it. “It carries its own weight emotionally and I’m wanting to escape that because I don’t want people f-----g feeling sorry for me.”

He addressed grief on 2019 single Two of Us, but has consciously sought out more upbeat subject matter for Faith in the Future, on songs including The Greatest, Lucky Again, Out of My System and mercurial indie rocker Silver Tongues. 

“I have become a bit of a soundboard for people’s grief, so I’m kind of stuck between a rock and a hard place. Because if I can help other people just from a little conversation about my own individual experience, that’s great, I really want to be there to help. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a burden.”

Tomlinson has been thoroughly enjoying being back on the road. “Performing live was always my favourite thing. I’ve had to build it back up, because I’ve never toured on my own, I had to relearn my craft and what the show needed. So it’s not as if I went into small theatres and thought, I used to play Wembley stadium, I’ve f---ing failed! I was having too much fun.”

He jokes about not even noticing if there has been any change in the level of luxury as he has shifted from one of the biggest bands in the world to a solo artist determined to prove himself. 

“Hotel rooms can be kind of lonely when you’re moving all the time, so it doesn’t matter how luxurious it is. I sleep on the tourbus, cause that’s where my band are, so its really social. It’s a f---ing lovely tourbus!” Next year he will be back onboard, touring Britain’s arenas. “It’s all going the right way, and I’m thankful to be here, doing what I love. It doesn’t feel as manic as it did in One Direction, but I still get recognised everywhere I go, so not much has changed.”

Like many stars, he’s conflicted about fame. “It’s something I have struggled to deal with over the years. If I go to the pub with me mates and we’re having a drink and being social, it doesn’t matter if just one person stops and is like, ‘Oh it’s Louis, can we have a picture?’ It takes me outside of that normality. Just one photo can kind of bug me for the next half hour. But I’m still ambitious, and if that means raising the temperature (of fame) again, it’s a little bit daunting, but that’s the life.”

There have been some exceedingly odd aspects to being a boyband superstar. A strand of online fan fiction imagined a passionate affair between Tomlinson and Styles, which was subsequently depicted in a graphic, animated sequence on hit HBO series Euphoria. Another piece of 1D fanfiction is being adapted for forthcoming movie The Idea of You, starring Anne Hathaway as an older woman having an affair with a boyband star. 

“It’s weird, all that s---,” tuts Tomlinson, disapprovingly. “But there’s not much you can do about it. I’d rather they didn’t, like, but it is what it is. I won’t be watching it.”

Tomlinson is excited about his new music, raving “I can imagine some of these songs being on albums by bands I would have listened to as a kid. It took me a second to find my feet after One Direction, and realise I need to be brave enough to embrace what I love.” 

He says he thinks about success differently now. “Its all about musical fulfilment. When you’re one of four or five, it's hard to express yourself as an individual. This music is who I am.”

He still expects One Direction to eventually reunite. “When you look at it on paper, it’s like, ‘How the f---’s it all gonna fit back together?’ We’re all making very different music, doing our own thing, all busy all the time. So I don’t see anything happening for at least another 10 years, but you never know. It looks pretty jumbled. But I think there is a world where it all kind of fits together.”

Full article

#louis press #telegraph #neil mccormick #9 november 2022 #sorry just catching up

[alexi-01]

tagged by miss @f1-birb 🫶🏻

name - lexi IS a nickname but it’s used more then my actual name at this point lmao

sign - aquaruis ♒️

last movie - i forced my mum to watch saw because she’s never seen it (she hates horror and now hates me)

last show - the wolf on bbc one

when i created this blog - i think this one was created in 2015 and i had one before that i just forgot the details for 💀

other blogs - i do have side blogs but i don’t actually ever use them because idc about what’s on my main anymore lmao if you follow me you WILL see my interests

do i get asks - yes i do and i love them!! honestly i get so many and i may not answer all of them but just know they’re appreciated 🫶🏻

followers - way more then i should honestly why do people follow me ( love you all 🥰)

average sleeping hours - non existent next question

instruments - none at all, unless a recorder counts.

what i’m wearing - my fave baggy jeans and a black crop top

dream job - photography, either in motorsport or concerts

dream trip - i would love to go NZ or aus, japan but also i really want to go back to barcelona

fave song atm - i have baddadan by chase & status on repeat so i would say that

i’m not tagging anyone, y’all be free in doing this and you can tag me if you want 🫶🏻

#tag game

[potentiallypotter]

Marauders Band Au (Positions + Songs)

James (Lead Vocals + Bassist) — Classically trained in several string instruments such as cello and violin. Originally was going to be a second guitarist but decided against it.

Sirius (Vocals + Drummer) — Says he loves the ‘Boom boom bang’ of the drums. Also a classically trained pianist. Was going to be on keyboard but he hates anything related to pianos.

Remus (Guitarist + Songwriter) — Owned an acoustic for years and wrote poems that turned into songs. Writes most but not all their songs.

Peter (Keyboard + Guitarist) — Probably plays the most instruments out of everyone, some of these include piano, guitar, french horn, tuba, and a two or three more. Band kid at heart.

Songs + Progress

They started off as a cover band that played small gigs at parties, night clubs, and pubs. The song they played that got them some buzz was ‘I Believe in a Thing Called Love’ by The Darkness, this was Sirius’ favorite band at the time. After that, more people started showing up to see them and they got a bit of a fan base. The first original song they ever performed was written by Remus and called ‘Dead or Alive’ They started uploading a mixture of covers and original songs to a YouTube page they created entitled ‘The Marauders’. James believed they had potential to go big and the internet was a great way to get started. Their content wasn’t limited to the band, sometimes they posted small videos of them just chatting, answering questions, individual singing/playing, and complete randomness. They were discovered by opening for a more popular band at a nightclub and began to slowly fade away from covers and only record original content. Songwriting became a group effort instead of being left solely to Remus though he wasn’t complaining. They continued to post some content on YouTube when they had time but only covers and talking videos. It was a creative decision that lead them to using their childhood nicknames as stage names and have it be their “thing”. Their debut album was simply titled ‘The Marauders’ despite major pushback from James and Sirius who claimed it to be unoriginal and unlike them. This album included 10 songs plus and intro, the cover art was a recreated picture of them from their days at Hogwarts with the original hanging behind them. As of now they have 2 albums, 4 singles, and a total of 27 songs (16 written by Remus, 5 written by James, 4 written by Peter, and 2 written by Sirius) Their albums and songs are listed below.

‘The Marauders’ (2015)

1. ‘Intro’ (57 Secs)

2. ‘What Lies Under The Bed’ (2:31, Written by Remus Lupin)

3. ‘House of Mirrors’ (2:43, Written by Remus Lupin)

4. ‘Dead or Alive’ (2:17, Written by Remus Lupin)

5. ‘Finish Him’ (3:12, Written by Remus Lupin)

6. ‘The Ticket [Hope’s Song] (4:19, Written by Remus Lupin)

7. ‘Astroid Heart’ (2:33, Written by Peter Pettigrew)

8. ‘Red Walls’ (3:14, Written by Remus Lupin)

9. ‘Crush’ (2:19, Written by James Potter)

10. ‘Friendly Flame’ (3:10, Written by James Potter)

11. ‘Written’ (2:57, Written by Sirius Black)

Total — 30:12

‘Rocket Science’ (2015 Single)

1. ‘Rocket Science’ (4:12, Written by Sirius Black)

‘Coffin Ready’ (2016 Single)

1. ‘Coffin Ready’ (3:42, Written by Peter Pettigrew)

‘Cabinet of Fools’ (2017)

1. ‘Invitation’ (2:13, Written by Peter Pettigrew)

2. ‘In The Nude’ (3:17, Written by James Potter)

3. ‘The Long Tragic Story Of A Teddy Bear’ (5:36, Written by Remus Lupin)

4. ‘Can You Fly’ (4:22, Written by Peter Pettigrew)

5. ‘Classic’ (3:20, Written by Remus Lupin)

6. ‘I Don’t Have. A Title For This’ (2:55, Written by James Potter)

7. ‘PMO’ (3:46, Written by Remus Lupin)

8. ‘My Name’ (4:06, Written by Remus Lupin)

9. ‘Soldier’s Lament’ (5:36, Written by Remus Lupin)

10. ‘Speak Of The Devil’ (2:43, Written by Remus Lupin)

11. ‘Kill The Party’ (3:04, Written by Remus Lupin)

12. ‘It Shall Appear’ (3:18, Written by Remus Lupin)

13. ‘Sorry (Translates to Fuck You)’ (3:09, Written by Remus Lupin)

Total — 47:25

‘Lion’s Heart’ (2019 Single)

1. ‘Lion’s Heart’ (5:32, Written by James Potter)

Unreleased (2022 Single)

‘Unreleased’ (3:47, Written by Remus Lupin)

[28whitepeonies]

Louis Tomlinson on his new album, struggling with fame and a One Direction reunion

The boyband star on his love of rock music, finding his own voice outside of One Direction, losing close family and fame's strangest moments. (By Neil McCormick @ The Telegraph)

“Do you mind if I smoke?” asks Louis Tomlinson, tapping cigarette ash into an empty Coke bottle. “The modern man smokes a vape, apparently. But I still smoke ciggies. I’m a judgemental fucker, and I hate vapers.”

He'd kidding, but the former One Direction boyband star certainly does like a cigarette, getting through half a dozen during an hour-long encounter in a hotel boardroom that reeks of stale tobacco. “Maybe I drink too much for a singer. Maybe I smoke too much for a singer. But it can be quite demanding, this life. So, for me to have those little vices, it’s important.”

Tomlinson is getting ready for the release this week of his second solo album, Faith in The Future. He seems both nervous and excited. “The lows are lower in a solo career, but the highs are higher,” he suggests. “Because you are not one of 4 or 5 anymore, you have to take full responsibility for everything, so it hits you at both ends.”

Scruffily unshaven, in gym wear and trainers, the 30-year-old hops up to open a window, while chatting away in a friendly and engaged manner. “I never really chose this life,” he insists, with a strong Doncaster accent (though he lives in Hertfordshire now). “I auditioned for X Factor and crossed me fingers. And now, here I am.”

In 2010, at the age of 18, Tomlinson and four other young hopefuls (Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Liam Payne and Zayn Malik) were assembled into a boyband mentored by entertainment impresario Simon Cowell. Although they didn’t win the talent show, their impish appeal saw them rise to become the most successful manufactured group of the modern era, achieving levels of fan mania comparable to the early days of The Beatles.

Together for five frenzied years, 1D have scored four number one albums, sold more than 200 million records worldwide, notched up over 21 billion streams, won seven BRIT awards and their final tour in 2015 grossed over $200  million (£173 million) in revenue. For a time, Tomlinson’s floppy fringe adorned teenage bedrooms all over the planet. There was considerable hysteria when 1D said they were taking a “hiatus”, citing exhaustion.

A reluctant solo artist: Louis Tomlinson (centre) was upset with One Direction's decision to separate in 2016

Tomlinson was the oldest member (two years Styles’s senior) with the shakiest voice but adored by fans for his genuine smile, wacky fashions and undisguised pleasure at being part of the gang. Styles had a cheeky swagger, Malik was the sensuous R&B singer, Horan the folkie-next-door, whilst Payne was a cocky Jack the lad (whose solo career has been a bit of a washout). As time went by, Tomlinson shed insecurities to get more involved in songwriting, helping push 1D’s pop rock side.

Faith in the Future (out on Friday) dials up the guitars, building on his chart-topping 2020 solo debut album Walls, inspired by Britpop and indie, the music of his pre-fame youth. “I used to spend all my Friday nights in this place called Priory, it was fucking unbelievable: £10 all you can drink! That’s been banned now. It was in that bar where I fell in love with guitar music.”

Although he retains a fondness for a big chorus, it is not a sound you would particularly associate with 1D. “I don’t relate to right-down-the-middle pop,” he admits. “But I wouldn’t say that was dumbed down in One Direction. Maybe I dumbed it down myself. Maybe I assumed I couldn’t be exactly who I was.”

Tomlinson was the last of the five members to release an album, and reveals that he was a reluctant solo artist, upset by the band’s decision to separate at the height of their world-beating success in 2016.

“It was a bit daunting. I’d just got to a stage where I really started to feel like I found my rhythm, I was enjoying songwriting, I felt like I finally worked out where I am in that band. And then it’s like: ‘Okay, well, now we’re going on a break.’ So there was a bit of petulance from my end, I was frustrated.”

He admits that he has felt competitive with his former bandmates and been jealous of Styles’s enormous solo success.

“I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me at first. Only ’cos I didn’t know where to place myself, and really my only point of reference was other members of the band. But it’s not surprising to me that Harry's the most commercially successful because he really fits the mould of a modern star.

"He’s not just doing music, he’s got film as well, and the (stadium) tour he’s done is unbelievable. It took me a while to work out where I stand. But I look on Harry like a brother, man. I have a lot of pride for what he’s doing.”

He says band members are quietly supportive of each other. “I’m sure the lads will text me when the album comes out, we check in on each other, we’re good like that. I bumped into Niall (Horan) at Glastonbury, and even though we hadn’t spoken all year, it was like absolutely no time had passed. Because we've lived through such experiences together in One Direction, this bond that we have is for life.”

Louis Tomlinson with his mother Johannah Deakin who died of leukaemia in 2016

Tomlinson has had other issues to focus on. In 2016, his mother Johannah Deakin, a midwife, died from leukaemia, aged 43. His parents separated when he was a child, and Tomlinson is estranged from his father, a hotel manager. He has seven younger half-siblings, one of whom, Félicité Tomlinson, died of an accidental drug overdose in 2019.

“I’m coping good, man,” he says. “I’m a glass half-full person because what’s the alternative? I’m not saying that there have not been some dark days, because there have. But I had a really lovely upbringing, and my mum was as good as gold.

“Even though she’s not here anymore, I wouldn’t want her to feel guilty for what happened. She wouldn’t want that to define my life and my happiness.”

He also feels a sense of responsibility to his family. “I’m the oldest of all my siblings, and I knew that I had to put on a brave face.” Nonetheless, Tomlinson, who is also father to a five-year-old son, whom he shares with his ex-girlfriend, confesses wariness when it comes to talking about it. “It carries its own weight emotionally and I’m wanting to escape that because I don’t want people fucking feeling sorry for me.”

He addressed grief on 2019 single Two of Us, but has consciously sought out more upbeat subject matter for Faith in the Future, on songs including The Greatest, Lucky Again, Out of My System and mercurial indie rocker Silver Tongues.

“I have become a bit of a soundboard for people’s grief, so I’m kind of stuck between a rock and a hard place. Because if I can help other people just from a little conversation about my own individual experience, that’s great, I really want to be there to help. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a burden.”

Tomlinson has been thoroughly enjoying being back on the road. “Performing live was always my favourite thing. I’ve had to build it back up, because I’ve never toured on my own, I had to relearn my craft and what the show needed. So it’s not as if I went into small theatres and thought, I used to play Wembley stadium, I’ve fucking failed! I was having too much fun.”

He jokes about not even noticing if there has been any change in the level of luxury as he has shifted from one of the biggest bands in the world to a solo artist determined to prove himself.

“Hotel rooms can be kind of lonely when you’re moving all the time, so it doesn’t matter how luxurious it is. I sleep on the tourbus, cause that’s where my band are, so its really social. It’s a fucking lovely tourbus!” Next year he will be back onboard, touring Britain’s arenas. “It’s all going the right way, and I’m thankful to be here, doing what I love. It doesn’t feel as manic as it did in One Direction, but I still get recognised everywhere I go, so not much has changed.”

Like many stars, he’s conflicted about fame. “It’s something I have struggled to deal with over the years. If I go to the pub with me mates and we’re having a drink and being social, it doesn’t matter if just one person stops and is like, ‘Oh it’s Louis, can we have a picture?’ It takes me outside of that normality. Just one photo can kind of bug me for the next half hour. But I’m still ambitious, and if that means raising the temperature (of fame) again, it’s a little bit daunting, but that’s the life.”

There have been some exceedingly odd aspects to being a boyband superstar. A strand of online fan fiction imagined a passionate affair between Tomlinson and Styles, which was subsequently depicted in a graphic, animated sequence on hit HBO series Euphoria. Another piece of 1D fanfiction is being adapted for forthcoming movie The Idea of You, starring Anne Hathaway as an older woman having an affair with a boyband star.

“It’s weird, all that shit,” tuts Tomlinson, disapprovingly. “But there’s not much you can do about it. I’d rather they didn’t, like, but it is what it is. I won’t be watching it.”

Tomlinson is excited about his new music, raving “I can imagine some of these songs being on albums by bands I would have listened to as a kid. It took me a second to find my feet after One Direction, and realise I need to be brave enough to embrace what I love.”

He says he thinks about success differently now. “Its all about musical fulfilment. When you’re one of four or five, it's hard to express yourself as an individual. This music is who I am.”

He still expects One Direction to eventually reunite. “When you look at it on paper, it’s like, ‘How the fuck’s it all gonna fit back together?’ We’re all making very different music, doing our own thing, all busy all the time. So I don’t see anything happening for at least another 10 years, but you never know. It looks pretty jumbled. But I think there is a world where it all kind of fits together.”

#here it is #the full article #for obvious reasons I’m not providing a link #no edits obv #well that’s not true #I have now edited the swear words back in #because the censoring was driving me demented #Louis Tomlinson #I’m posting this mainly because it’s from #the telegraph #and I’d like to do as much as possible to stop people posting that paper #it’s quite long #faith in the future #09 November 2022 #Neil McCormick

[baladric]

(this is long and rambly so cut after the first paragraph)

re: analogies about getting ADHD diagnosed and medicated at the very end of one’s 20s, i’m struck with the memory of when i played the entirety of bastion with a file i had no idea was corrupted.

the game’s ground textures were entirely missing, and if you’ve played bastion, you know that falling off the edge of the world is a big component of the game, as the walkable paths rise up as you traverse each level and are notably very rickety because, you know, the world has ended in huge cataclysm. with the ground textures missing, i had no way of seeing where the edges were—so understandably, i died a lot. the game was fucking hard.

i didn’t find out this was a game error until about a month after i beat the it, when my brother and i were talking about it and i said, “it was really good but i don’t understand the design decision to make the ground invisible??” to which he said “what?”

i showed him my game file and he was fucking gobsmacked that i’d made it past the first level, let alone beat the whole-ass game, and sent an email to supergiant for me to tell them his younger sibling had just become the best gamer alive by beating a corrupted-ass download of their game (a funny statement to me that he meant in all seriousness because what the fuck), at which point i was sent a fresh download key and a lot of Very confused and adulatory emails asking for screenshots. i vaguely remember them adding a steam achievement for beating the game with that glitch.

i replayed the game, and i immediately felt like i’d been ripped off. it had taken me about a month to beat the game without ground textures; it took me four days to beat it with them. all that hard work and frustration and, honestly, full-on weeping, and it had been a machine error the entire time. it did not have to be as hard as it was. it was not intended to be as hard as it was.

i’ve been on a non-stimulant ADHD medication for almost 7 months, and once again, i feel so fucking cheated. for 29 years, the simplest tasks defeated me. my GPA never once peaked above a 2.9 because i just couldn’t do the work from the first moment i started elementary school until i eventually got kicked out of graduate school. i hated myself every single day for being unable to muster the wherewithal to do any of the things that other people did daily with seeming ease—and i hated all the mental health professionals who told me i just lacked work ethic, that things were hard for everyone, that i just had to take it one step at a time and power through. i saw so many fucking therapists and psychiatrists and art therapists and fucking ayurvedic practitioners, and nothing helped.

i had never finished a significant project in my life without the threat of extrenal repercussions, but three months after starting the new meds, i wrote and finished two stories, one clocking in just shy of 20,000 words, the other 40,000.

seven months in, and i have blossomed as an artist on a level i couldn’t even dream of before this, because i now have the seemingly simple ability to sit down and work. i’ve made so much art i love that i’ve had to open a new drive account to store it all. i’ve written at least another 40,000 words since finishing Sweet Hope, including the 20,000+ words of pirate au. i’m learning how to record audiobooks, i’m getting into proper singing shape for the first time since i graduated in 2015, i’m forming invaluable new, collaborative friendships and deepening my long-term relationships to untold levels.

i wake up at 9 every day of my own accord, and going to sleep past 1 am feels horrible. my thoughts are clear more often than not, and in this vivid, present space, i’ve come to understand myself on such an intrinsic and intimate level that all the clawing and fighting and internal screaming i’d been doing about my gender identity for years has gone quiet like the flip of a switch. i’ve found ways to not care if people don’t like me, to speak my mind, to permit people to see me how they are going to see me, regardless of the actual truth of their perceptions.

literally every part of me has not just changed, but condensed down into a solidity i never, ever thought i would achieve. people think i’m funny now, i keep getting invited to parties and being sought after as a friend, music opporunities are cropping up, unsought, like fucking dandelions, and i've had multiple job offers from incredible theatrical creators. something huge has shifted in me, something that’s visible from the outside, something that’s good. i’m not exaggerating when i say that i love who i am now, when before i was honestly lucky to live through some days, so deep and ingrained was my self-hatred.

i jokingly attribute this frankly fucking astonishing and sudden leveling out of my entire existence to the mystical magic of turning 30, but honestly? it’s the meds. it’s the fucking meds, and the knowledge that this is all it would have taken the entire time makes me so unspeakably sad for my past self—because it literally did not have to be as hard as it was. not once.

#if you're struggling just know it's not your fault #adhd #personal #self-hatred mention

[tmisaccidentreportbook]

MAG033, Boatswain’s Call

Case #0110201, Carlita Sloane Release date: August 18, 2016 First listen: 6th November, walking into work, remember crossing the overflow car park

The Big Boy Man, Oh Lord, He Cometh. Our first look at Peter Lukas, the other Sad Sea Dad of Rusty Quill.

- TIMOTHY STOKER! THE STONKER! MY BOY! MY SWEET CHEESE! MY ROTTEN LIL’ SOLDIER BOY!

- Reasons I love Tim: He gives me ‘bi guy who uses finger guns’ energy, he is not above weaponising his charms, and he’s also concerned about hoW SOME SHIT DOESN’T ADD UP JONNY!

- I’m being overly critical and harsh, and God knows, if I’d been putting a project like this together, I’d need a warehouse for all the wall space my cork boards would need to take up, but I’m grateful that they are addressing some of this in universe.

- I feel sorry for Jon and Jonny both. For Jon, he got yeeted into this position with no warning, he’s trying his best but he doesn’t quite know what he’s doing so he’s clinging to professionalism and academia like his life depends on it. These mistakes must be hugely embarrassing for him, eating away at him. And if these mistakes are just honest writing slips, then I feel for Jonny. It’s a new, big project, the early days were fucking chaos because of a perfect storm of issues, mistakes get made. But I love how it’s handled in universe.

- ‘Oh, and don’t get me started on the other case numbers around the Hill Top hauntings, they’re a mess…’ BIG MOOD.

- Please tell me Josh Cole and Samantha Emery were listeners who heard the inconsistencies and got in touch. Also, what sort of degrees are these guys doing, because I want in on that.

Supplemental: THEY WERE! Oh I love that! Heck yeah!

- Tim’s trying to be so kind about it and making it out to be no big deal, even using it as an opportunity to introduce Jon to some other people around the institute, and Jon is snapping and snarling like a cornered, wounded animal.

- Tim being the audience surrogate to give us a clear explanation of the file numbering system, thank you sweet child. Also possible that he does in fact know the system, and it pitching a soft ball at Jon to rebuild his confidence a little.

- Tim is like the office emotional support golden retriever and I love him but that role can take its toll on a person and my boy’s got hidden depths. I think he can just see Jon struggling and it trying to throw him a line.

- ‘Martin keeps showing me his tongue and asking if it ‘looks infested’.’ You can hear the ‘bi panic’ in that uncomfortable laugh because you KNOW my boy Martin is a snacc.

- Jon just sounds so beaten down and tired. I don’t suppose any of them have been sleeping terribly well of late, between Sasha’s encounter with The Distortion and Martin’s encounter with The Flesh Hive. The Institute probably isn’t the most welcoming or homiest of bolt holds.

- Straight out the gate, needed to google where Porto do Itaqui was because I had next to no idea. Also, Brazil if flipping huge and its’ shore line is a lot wigglier than I gave it credit for.

- The Tundra, what a name for a ship. Ugh, it’s brilliant, I hate it. The world’s Arctic Tundra is estimated to have a population of 4 million. That’s 0.05% of the world’s population for about 10% of the world’s land mass.

- ‘A lot of people don’t think shipping is a job for women. Hell, a lot of people who work on ships don’t think it is.’ The 2021 BIMCO/ICS Seafarer Workforce Report records women making up 1.2% of the global seafarer workforce, and that’s a 45.8% increase compared with the 2015 report. Carlita has has to fight for her place and I bloody respect her for that. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had, indeed, made men bled for it.

- ‘…at that point I was starting to get a bit desperate’, and that’s just how they get you isn’t it. The Entities have a wonderful knack of rolling in when all the other doors are closing and you believe that the alternative for what you reaching for has to be worse. I wasn’t sure what ‘workaway’ meant, as far as I understand it, she’d be working for passage and food.

- Peter Lukas. The Big Boy Man himself. Wonder if the lil bit of pepper Jon is putting on the name is the result of a few jigsaw pieces falling into place?

- ‘He sat there at a small table, completely alone, drinking a cup of black coffee.’ There is zero joy in this man. Just none.

- The way Carlita describes it, with the feeling of a door closing, it almost feels like Lukas is maintaining a little pocket of the lonely in this seedy bar, one that Carlita unwitting steps into, leaving the rest of the world behind.

- ‘We have one space.’ Well… isn’t that fucking convenient.

- The lack of activity and the shipping containers already in situ, I’m trying to remember, does Carlita discover that they’re empty?

- I looked up a boatswain’s call whistle and played a few mp3, shrill little things. Got a lot of different calls to relay different messages over the noise of work and the sea, but my favourite thing I learned is that in Star Trek, the boatswain's call can be heard before anytime Kirk speaks to the crew over the comms.

- Not sure what the pay difference is between ordinary and able seaman, but the ranking system was introduced in1652. I think it is just a case of experience at sea.

- Must have been a quick cast off and she must have been desperate if she didn’t have time to discover the bearing until they were already out of port. One advantage to being OS as opposed to an AS I suppose is a drop in responsibilities. In theory, she just needed to pull her weight and get home.

- ‘Hell, not being too comfortable around people is a damn fine reason to go to sea.’ Big mood. But you can’t really take that with you an apply it to the crew that same way. Not when you’re working on the sea and need to work together for survival in so many instances. As well as the isolation, there’s the added threat of isolation in a hostile environment. Also kudos to her for not going insane, I really like my own company, but I’m not a fan of extended silence. Don’t like the thoughts getting in, so I turn to podcasts, and podcasts lead to these sort of fucking things…

- Kinda feel for Lukas a lil, even on your own boat, you’re hiding from folks.

- What was it about Sean Kelly that made him scared? Had he been a recent addition to the crew? Fresh enough to not be hardened to it but there long enough to know what’s happening? Also, making him a quasi countryman to Carlita, there was a foothold for camaraderie there, but it never happened.

- Containers rusted in place, never moved on or off of the Tundra, only painted and repainted. The cargo isn’t in the containers. There may have been worries about Carlita’s previous ship possibly trafficking people, but I think this vessel is of more concern.

- I appreciate that she’s smart and savvy enough to not go poking around when she first sees something amiss. We’ve had some idiots, and Ms Sloane is not one of them.

- Gotta love a woman with a pair of steelies.

- EMPTY CONTAINERS! CALLED IT!

- The boatswain's call, the ‘old-fashioned boat, with oars and a winch’, there’s something archaic about The Lonely. Something very old, or rather, behind the times.

- Yup, Sean Kelly’s the sacrificial lamb and the whistle is the dinner bell. It’s a little bit of a take on the ‘Appease the Volcano God’ trope, swapping heat and lava for cold and fog.

- ‘…it “hadn’t been an easy choice”.’ Yeah I would have stuck to myself after that too.

- ‘…twenty-five thousand pounds. For barely two weeks work. I don’t mind telling you, it was almost enough to tempt me back. Almost.’ So that’s why folks stay. For the pay. I wonder how many folks on that vessel were desperate enough that they chose to roll the dice and keep sailing?

- ‘…here does not appear to have been anything explicitly supernatural occurring in this statement.’ Jon’s right, from the outside it just appears real weird and probably a murder was committed.

- ‘…the Tundra is a currently-active cargo ship operating for Solus Shipping PLC, a company founded and majority-owned by Nathaniel Lukas.’ Solus… solo… urgh. Also, where in the line of Jonah’s Lukas sugar daddies does Nathaniel fall? Actually, that’s a present tense. Is that Elias’ ex-to-the-power-of-twelve brother-in-law or something?

- ‘It doesn’t look like I’m going to be able to do any further investigations into this.’ Proceeds to list off a shopping list of hinky shit that warrants a lot of digging getting more salty and rabid with each word. Starting to see a little bit of season 2 Jon come through there.

#MAG033 #the magnus archives #The Lonely

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Finished the four David O’Doherty albums. It’s been a while since I’ve gone through all of someone’s stand-up recordings in chronological order, and I forgot how much I enjoy doing that. I enjoy watching someone’s style evolve over time – usually you can see where it’s going in the early ones, and see them get better and better at what they were always going for in later ones. Also I just find it kind of fun to listen to their personal stories change, from “I’m single and here’s why that’ll never change” to “Here’s why married life annoys me” to “Let me tell you about my kids”. Though DO’D doesn’t get that personal and I don’t think he’s married at all, so the primary change of that sort was going from “I recently turned 35 and I hate that that happened because it feels too old” to “I’m 44 and it feels weird to be that age and still playing plastic keyboards, but actually I don’t mind being mid-forties.”

The other thing that happens, when you go through someone’s work chronologically, is there’s often a sharp change in tone right around 2016. I’ve done this with enough people now to see a pattern. Comedians who were known for being light and purely fun in earlier years come out for their first recorded show post-Brexit and Trump, and they’re different. We were all different after that, not just from the direct consequences. As a Canadian I was lucky to not be subject to direct consequences of either (though indirect consequences, of Trump at least, definitely hit Canada, from tariffs to the rhetoric drifting up here to one of my friends had a friend die on the plane that blew up because of the tensions Trump escalated with Iran), but aside from any direct consequences, everyone had our eyes opened to how many people out there believe in shit like that. And after learning that, it’s hard to come back and do a straightforward observational set without at least a little acknowledgement of the darkness that it was easier to ignore before the US and UK both did actual surveys of all their people and the results said, “There’s a lot more darkness here than people thought.”

There are some exceptions to this, of course. You can see some changes as you watch all Frankie Boyle’s DVDs – he gets more specific and political as they go along – but it’s tough for him to get much bleaker or darker than the way he started. And some comedians have material so separate from politics or the world at large that they can keep it that way through anything. But a bunch of the ones I’ve seen have had at least a small change in tone.

But a lot of them change at least a bit, and DO’D was no exception. His albums skip straight from 2015 to 2020, so 2016 and COVID changed things since we last heard from him. He recorded his 2020 album on his phone, while sitting in a car in the middle of the night at the top of a hill on Achill Island, just off the West coast of Ireland, during a storm. Which is pretty fucking cool. The storm audibly picks up throughout the album – at the beginning he says you might hear the storm but I don’t notice it, and by the end I can clearly hear the wind and the rain outside. That’s a solid way to capture 2020. I mean, obviously the pandemic alone did not create that. The pandemic meant he had to record the album by himself instead of with an audience – it didn’t mean he had to drive to the top of a hill during a storm in the middle of the night and record it on his phone. DO’D just chose to do that because he’s more punk than the Sex Pistols, actually.

It's hard to pick a favourite, especially as I’ve just listened to them all within a couple of days and with things like this you only know your favourite once some time has passed and you see which one you go back to. But I think the third one was the best. By then, he’d gotten more confident in what he’d been doing more hesitantly in the first two. His use of music got more deliberate, I think. I mean obviously it was always deliberate, but on the third album it felt easier to see a way the keyboard added to the story every time he used it, while in his first album I think he sometimes used it just because he wasn’t sure the story would be funny enough otherwise, when in fact it would be fine on its own.

The fourth one is different – he has all the performance skills of the third album and more, but he’s also sitting in a car in the middle of the night. That one is good because of those circumstances. I like hearing the storm pick up, I like hearing him sound genuinely confused about the future as he tries to guess where this will go, I like the sense that most of this has not been tried much on audiences and it’s just what came into his head. But on a technical level the third is probably stronger - I guess there is in fact a reason why comedians usually try stuff out on audiences a lot before recording it.

Overall, I think my favourite track is a story about Lance Armstrong off the third album.

Anyway, I’m really glad I listened to all that. For some reason, I thought David O’Doherty lived in England. Possibly just because I know Dara O’Briain and Ed Byrne live in England, so I just assumed that’s what Irish comedians do when they’re famous. But it sounds like DO’D never left Ireland. So adding him to my Britcom list would be both a misnomer and a technically statement of support for the subjugation of Ireland, suggesting that albums by a guy who was born in Ireland and still lives in Ireland count as British comedy (as opposed to putting someone like Desiree Burch or Katherine Ryan on there, who have done much of their comedy work in Britain even if that’s not where they started). I mean, I’ve added it to the list anyway. I’m sorry, David. Does it help at all if I decide that the “Brit” in “Britcom” is short for “British Isles”? Probably not. What if I decide it’s “Brit-ish” like Just For Laughs did in their Britcom show that was hosted by Dara O’Briain? Actually that’s probably worse, the “-ish” suffix means “sort of” and I’m fairly sure Irish people don’t want to be called “sort of British”. What if I say it’s just because he performs in Britain a lot? By that logic I should put Alice Fraser on the list, which I haven’t done because she’s Australian, but maybe she should be there. These are the things I think far too much about, given that it’s a spreadsheet on my own computer and Google Drive account that does not do or affect anything.

I’ve also noticed that while I’ve seen other people call him “DOD” and I got in the habit of doing that because it’s faster and it’s a bit funny and I know people will understand what I mean, on his own website, he signs his posts “DO’D”. Probably because that’s just what he does and it has no real meaning, but possibly as a way to make a point in response to people who try to de-Irish-ize a name by taking out its punctuation (one of his albums does have a story about how he’s been asked to fill out his last name in an online form that won’t let him use characters that aren’t letters). I’m aware that anglicizing Irish names is something I do anyway on this blog, just because I don’t take the time to put in the Ó character every time I want to write a name that should actually be spelled as Dara Ó Briain. But I think I’ll start putting the apostrophe into DO’D at least, because whether or not he does it to make a serious point, I generally believe in referring to people the way they’ve indicated they want to be referred to.

That last bit was a tangent. The point is that they’re good albums. I really like his perspective. The way he looks at things and the way he approaches talking about things. The way he plays with tension, which I wrote about after his second album but he definitely keeps that up in the third and fourth. The way he’s so straightforward and... the term “raw” is generally not associated with the type of music he does, but I’ve already called him more punk than the Sex Pistols, so I think I can say that too. Everything sounds genuine and direct.

Also I know he had a whole album before all these so technically I should be talking about these as his second through fifth albums, but the first one is not on Bandcamp and I can’t find it elsewhere online. So what I mean are the first, second, third, and fourth albums on his Bandcamp page. Which can be found here, if anyone else wants them.

[pashterlengkap]

Mike Johnson “applauds” efforts to make gay marriage & sodomy illegal again

Anti-LGBTQ+ House Speaker Mike Johnson (R-LA) didn’t just agree with Justice Clarence Thomas’ suggestion that the Supreme Court should revisit its 2015 decision legalizing same-sex marriage — he applauded it. The court’s 2022 decision in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization struck down Roe v. Wade, ending the constitutional right to abortion in the U.S. In his concurring opinion, Thomas included a footnote asserting that by striking down the legal basis for Roe, the court had called into question every other decision using the same reasoning. Related: Mike Johnson says his pals would use trans laws to spy on naked girls He argued that trans people shouldn’t have rights because his friends were peeping Toms. Thomas went so far as to specifically name the Supreme Court’s decisions in Obergefell v. Hodges and Lawrence v. Texas, the cases that established the legal right to same-sex marriage nationally and struck down anti-sodomy laws, respectively. Get the Daily Brief The news you care about, reported on by the people who care about you: Subscribe to our Newsletter The same day that the court released its Dobbs decision in June 2022, Johnson cheered Thomas’s footnote on conservative pundit Todd Starnes’s radio show. In an audio recording resurfaced by CNN this week, Johnson touted his years of experience fighting against same-sex marriage, same-sex adoption, and same-sex marital benefits as a senior attorney for anti-LGBTQ+ hate group Alliance Defending Freedom (ADF) prior to being elected to public office. “We’ve been sort of working against these activist courts for years,” Johnson said. “I was in those courts for 20 years, in federal court litigating these big cases, religious freedom, pro-life cases before I got elected to Congress in 2016.” “There’s been some really bad law made,” Johnson continued. “They’ve made a mess of our jurisprudence in this country for the last, you know, several decades, and maybe some of that needs to be cleaned up.” “What Justice Thomas is calling for is not radical,” he added. “In fact, it’s the opposite of that, you know? We finally have a majority of originalists on the court, and all that means is that they want to fairly interpret and apply the Constitution as it’s written, as the framers of the Constitution intended. That’s the basis of our whole system of government, and we have to get back to that. And that’s what he stands for, and we applaud that.” Since taking the speakership late last month after weeks of Republican infighting, Johnson’s anti-LGBTQ+ beliefs and extensive history of opposing LGBTQ+ rights have come under scrutiny alongside his key role in efforts to overturn the results of the 2020 election. In addition to his work for the ADF, which included work for a now-defunct anti-LGBTQ+ Christian group that promoted so-called “conversion therapy,” he wrote several editorials in the early 2000s criticizing the Supreme Court for striking down anti-sodomy laws. His editorials also opposed same-sex marriage and argued against non-discrimination protections for LGBTQ+ people. More recently, as a member of Congress, Johnson introduced a federal version of Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” law, falsely accused President Joe Biden of breaking federal law by displaying the Progress Pride flag outside the White House, and claimed that parents do not have the right to provide their children with access to gender-affirming healthcare. Johnson still sits on the board of a conservative Christian publishing company that says MPOX is the “appropriate penalty” for being gay. His wife, Kelly, runs a Christian counseling service that compared LGBTQ+ identities to bestiality on its website. In an October 3 call with the World Prayer Network, Johnson said that America is “dark and depraved” because there are too many LGBTQ+ people. http://dlvr.it/SzJ7G7