GAME OF THE YEAR ("GOTY") (as they call it) 20222
Fellas!!!!! Howsit going Tumblr, felt like writing about video game again because my brain loves video games! I like thinking about video games more than actually playing them! There’s plenty of us out there who watched a baker’s million video essays in their adolescence and have been poisoned (PLAGUED... even) with gaming knowledge and insights. And I’m one of them!!!!!!!!!!! So here it is, Y'INZ... my top 300 games of christian year 2022.
And just to preface before one of you FREAKS gets any funny ideas, I think basing your GOTY lists on just what released in a given calendar year is bogus! If you do this, GET OUT OF HERE! If you only play the newest games on your PS5 and don't even look at anything released before 2018, everyone at the lunch table thinks you smell weird. So put on some antiperspirant and play freaking Halo Combat Evolved for pete's sake! (EDITOR'S NOTE: Despite this joke, Richard has not yet completed Halo: Combat Evolved despite owning it.)
HONORABLEST MENTION
Sometimes you have a list that has honorable mentions. me too!
Mario Kart 8 Booster Course Pass (Nintendo Switch)
This is actually not very good since it's just cheap mobile game levels imported into the MK8 engine. Unfortunately I love giving Nintendo money AND happen to think that playing Mario Kart after a hard day at the mine shaft is pretty relaxing. So even if they imported levels from like Forza Motorsport I think I would like that.
Sonic Origins (Nintendo Switch)
Is this even really a game to rank on a list like this? 30 year old Genesis remakes shoddily copy pasted into the Hedgehog Engine for some reason? With extra content really not worth engaging with? Ehhhh whatever man, this guy has Sonic 3 in it. You ever play Sonic 3 before? If not go do that instead and come back ONLY IF you've completed at least Flying Battery Zone. I would go further but I'd totally understand if you stop playing after pushing the Sandopolis blocks.
WWE 2K22 (PS5)
Regrettably, the newest outing from 2K Sports and WWE is probably my second most played game on this list. Not that this game is even bad, I mean it is probably the best WWE game in the last 10 years. Tons of modes, good visuals, cool roster. I played the banana slamma outta this game for like a month. But then I realized I was having more fun assigning championships to created guys on my roster to match the week-to-week championship histories of modern WWE and AEW rather than, you know, actually playing it. So I haven't touched this in about seven months. Something about the moment-to-moment gameplay of 2K just doesn't engage me at all, feels too slow but also not impactful enough to match how wrestling actually feels to watch. Feels faker than the real thing, believe it or not.
Ship of Harkinian (PC)
This only didn't make the list since, I mean like it's Ocarina of Time from 1998 which I first played in 2010 and have replayed approximately 8 times. But I've been waiting for something like this since the Ocarina of Time source code was 100% decompiled late last year, and the fellas over on the King's ship have given me everything I wanted. 60 FPS gameplay, tons of tweaks to improve on OOT's core features, support for nearly every device under God's watchful glare, controller remapping AND analog camera. Still doesn't look as good as the 3DS version but if you choose to play Nintendo Switch Online version rather than this you are under arrest.
OK THIS IS THE LIST EVERYTHING BEFORE WAS NOT REAL
16. Super Kiwi 64 (PC)
I remember picking up this game while being stressed out about going to a social function. The sales pitch for me was simple: it plays like an N64 platformer AND you can beat it in an hour.
As someone who has more games in his backlog than iPhone chargers in his plastic bag of chargers (pictured), it feels good sometimes to just... crank one out y'know? One session of non-stop platforming and you never have to worry about it again. Pure dopamine to your chrome dome.
It helps that SK64 is a pretty fun time too. With controls so fluid that I don't think I messed up one of my thousands of jumps, levels which are just the right about of expansive as to not be too imposing or restrictive, and a story which makes me grin to the edge of my cheek bone but not further, this is an easy recommend for people of my age range and taste in gaming.
15. Astro's Playroom (PS5)
That's right gaming public, PROOF that I own a PS5. I purchased that white block of solid matter in January after realizing the sheer amount of gaming experiences I was missing by not being in the PlayStation ecosystem. Of course, directly after making the plunge, one of my main PS holdouts I thought would never release on PC (Spider-Man (2018)), well, did. So I haven't really used my PS5 as much as I probably should have for a $500 investment. My fault, of course, for being bad with money.
But for the brief three hours that I was playing Astro's Playroom, I was not thinking these things. Not that I was absolutely head over heels in love, just that I thought, "hey! this little (big) ps5 system ain't so bad! it has this cute little robot game where I can be surrounded by playstation propaganda and murder the dinosaur from the ps1 tech demo!"
I put this game right above Kiwi since they are both pretty short but the sheer effort put into Astro's presentation just notches it a little ahead. You can tell the devs of this loved making it and, hey, I loved playing it too. A little bit. Not $500 love but maybe $10 over the course of 50 years love.
14. Mario's Super Picross (SNES) (by way of Switch Online)
Much like Kiwi, I played the majority of Picross this year while being stressed out over a social arrangement. But while the social arrangement surrounding Kiwi's purchase and playtime was honestly not that bad and I was just being an anxious little bear, the social arrangement surrounding Picross was a wedding. A wedding I had no friends to go there with, taking place 6 hours away with a crowd full of people who went to Liberty University. Needless to say I was dreading the days leading up to this thing. I distinctly remember sitting there, in my rented Airbnb quite literally just in someone's house, thinking to myself, "why the fuck am I here in someone's house for a wedding I will not have fun at?"
So instead of thinking that, I got lost in Picross. While a game I've certainly heard plenty about, Picross seemed to me like it would be confusing to learn and not super fun for me to play. But all it took was a friend explaining the basics to this Japanese-language-only game for me to figure it out. The game started with easy 5x5 puzzles to get my feet wet with the idea of breaking blocks to match the numbers on each row and column. But before I knew it, I was staring down the barrel of a 25x20 board with 30 minutes to figure everything out. And the cool part was that I didn't necessarily feel overwhelmed by that point. The concept had seeped itself into my head that much.
I'll definitely be playing more of this game in the future. I don't think I've even completed a quarter of this game's gargantuan list of puzzles. I kind of don't want to complete this one because I know if I do I'll be sent down the rabbit's hell of Picross games. That puzzle debt is too great for me at the moment.
13. Sonic Frontiers (PC)
Nearly two years ago, I wrote a bunch of words about Sonic on this very blog that ended with this pretentious garbage:
I don’t want SEGA to half ass [the next Sonic game]. I want them to boldly step into that abyss with a vision of Sonic that appeals to the heart of the fandom. Because, even if it’s been down recently, that heart is still beating, and after the abuse it’s already taken, it’s going to take a hell of a lot to get it to stop. And if SEGA can get this heart pumping to its full extreme as it had in years past, we may have something legendary to look forward to.
And, uhh, that kind of happened? Sonic fans seemingly across the board (or as much across the board of lavishly online Sonic nerds as you can get) are utterly in love with Sonic Frontiers for appealing straight into the heart of early 2000s Sonic fandom.
There's plenty about this game that I can look at and say with certainty that I absolutely love. These main four hedgehog et al characters have never been written this well in a mainline title of the series. At its best, Sonic running around the open world is a straight up good time. And the three titan boss themes have been permanently stuck in my headphones and may be some of my favorite songs of the past several years.
So its a shame then that Sonic Frontiers doesn't quite come together very well. The gameplay loop just feels kind of... random to me in a way that no other game in the series has ever been. In a four hour Sonic Frontiers review podcast (*shudder*) JebTube calls some of the challenges that open the map up "Among Us tasks" which may have just ruined that part of the game for me. More than anything, though, the controls just don't quite stick the landing for me. You feel pretty magnetized to the ground even when running off a ledge, which feels pretty strange when the very foundation of this series is based on being launched up a vertical slope into the air.
Still, it's hard not to respect what SEGA was able to accomplish with this one. Harping on potential is often a fool's errand but sometimes, with a media property that has spat you into the dirt more often than not, its hard not to cling onto that potential so that hope isn't totally lost.
12. Sonic Triple Trouble 16-Bit (PC)
Thankfully, even if the mainline Sonic releases are spotty, fanmade content has kept the spirit alive and beating. And this title, made entirely by one guy (Noah Copeland of bearded twitter PFP fame), is the latest in the Sonic fandom's absolute service to older games in the series. From the Retro Engine decomp releases to mods that force games like Adventure DX and Heroes kicking and screaming to the operating table, Sonic fans love improving on older games. Because we love those games. And preserving the core of what made those games so special while improving on the many objective flaws they may have it's the highest tribute you could possibly make to it.
Triple Trouble 16-Bit may be the shining example of this phenomenon. The base of this remake is in an already decent Game Gear game released in 1994, at the height of Sonic's popularity. But it's just too hard to play those Game Gear games in the modern day. There's a certain retro crappiness that comes with playing a game like that, with cropped aspect ratios and 3rd rate visuals bringing down a decent concept. With a fresh Genesis inspired coat of paint and enough tweaks to the overall package that make things way better to actually play, Copeland's project is pretty clearly the only way to play that game right now.
Seeing this game given such love and care makes me yearn for this treatment for other older Sonic games. Like, hear me out OK? Sonic Rush. 16:9 widescreen. No screen switching weirdness to make it easy for modern screens. CD quality soundtrack. Turn down the trick SFX. And tweak the level design to not be so unforgiving. I would do that but I'm a talentless hack!
11. Spider-Man Remastered (PS5)
When I purchased my PS5 earlier this year, I had two games in mind to play on it. One of them was Spider-Man, which has been taunting me for the last five years since its unveiling at one of those old E3 shows. Swinging around like the red guy is just one of those innately fun ideas, I think. Kids think it when looking outside the car window. Adults think it when looking outside their office's window. I want to jump out of here and swing around monkey-style!
Really, Spider-Man only needed to do that right and, shocker, it does do the swinging right. It doesn't even really matter that the open world is in New York, the pinnacle of urban homogeneity and therefore not an incredibly fun world to look around in. New York City skyscrapers were tailor-made for web swinging and video games have been trying to capture that magic for 40 years. You can argue that the 2004 Spider-Man 2 game has a bit more depth to it, but 2018's version is just so smooth and effortless. Really makes me feel like Sp-
Of course there's a story and structure to this game too. Which were both fine. Both serviceable, both doing exactly what they needed to and nothing more. Which probably is bad if you like Spider-Man more for its narrative. But also you don't exist, I had just made up a guy in my head.
10. Dark Souls II (PC)
The end of 2021 revealed to me one crucial detail - I like Dark Souls and Soulslike games after years of failed attempts. This realization occurring conveniently before the release of FromSoftware's next behemoth Elden Ring. So the race was on - how many Soulsborne games developed by FromSoftware could I complete before getting to Elden Ring?
In January, all eyes turned to Dark Souls II as the immediate next step after slaying Lord Gwyn. I've heard a lot about it, not all positive of course. There's a lot of annoying little things about this one. The controls feel a little weird. The health bar is constantly going down. The levels feel kind of samey and lack a ton of level-to-level cohesion. The bosses are truly all over the place.
But, like, Dark Souls 1 had a lot of problems too. So why did I not love this one as much? The gameplay loop involved in tackling monumental challenge is still as fun as ever, and none of the areas are truly repulsive in quality or anything. Maybe it's the fact that I can't really remember much about the experience that says it all here. Still, I had a good time messing around with this one, and even from the bit I experimented with it looks like replaying DSII is definitely worth it.
9. Risk of Rain 2 (PC)
Gamer confession time - I do not care for Roguelikes. I've tried, believe me I've tried. Isaac, Gungeon, Necrodancer, Spelunky, none of these ever did anything for me. So what were these missing? At risk of going on too much of a tangent, let's just keep it simple. They didn't have multiplayer.
Risk of Rain 2, has multiplayer. And just by nature of that one addition, I'm sold on the idea of randomly generated runs of similar content. What can I say? Reacting to the different events in every run is a lot more fun when there's people to react with. Tackling the challenge of getting to the end of a 90 minute run is a lot more satisfying when it's a group effort. And learning the game's mechanics and intricacies by asking a question to a human is a lot more engaging than doing so to a Fandom page.
You know what else Risk of Rain 2 has? Loader. Gosh damped Loader is in this game. Loader has a grapple hook that can fling her across the level AND can uppercut small critters. I want to be her when I'm robotic and dead.
8. Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order (PC)
Star Wars is kind of exhausting to engage with. Thankfully, beyond being another piece of the Disney media machine, Jedi Fallen Order is a pretty fun game as well.
I had this game on my backlog for about two years and I'm glad I finally got to it. The main make or break for me, the Metroid-enjoyer of my friend circle, is how the levels would be laid out to incentivize exploration and finding essential movement-based items along the way to facilitate progress. And while not as good as, say, Metroid Prime in that regard, Jedi Fallen Order hits a lot of those beats. I didn't even think there'd be a double jump in this game (for some reason) but when I got one it immediately made me think of all the new areas I could explore with that new ability. Combat is pretty fun here as well, with a slew of abilities both involving your saber and your force hands to obliterate the white menace (Stormtroopers) and all rats that come from the dirt.
Taken as just a game, it's a good time, albeit one that feels like a mashup of a lot of other successful game ideas and mechanics. But when all these mechanics and features are wrapped in a cozy Star Wars shaped wrapping paper along with a gift card to "Actually Tells an Interesting Story of Regret and Acceptance Without Relying Too Heavily on Star Wars Tropes And Areas," maybe it comes together better than the sum of its parts.
7. Splatoon 3 (Nintendo Switch)
Boy howdy, do I love giving money to Nintendo. One of my favorite pastimes, that and sitting. I'll be honest though, I wasn't too keen on engaging with Splatoon 3 up to launch. Nothing really grabbed me as someone who only liked Splatoon 1 and 2. To be honest, I was more of a fan of the single player modes of those earlier games. So if anything, I would just get it for the campaign. Which would have been fine, Splat 3's story takes the best of Octo Expansion's creative level ideas into a wild story that ends with a cool boss fight, like expected.
What I didn't expect was for one of Splatoon 3's multiplayer modes to make a believer out of me, which did end up happening. Not turf war though, at least not really. Still only think that mode is alright at best and infuriating at worst. Or Ranked/Anarchy, sweating in Splatoon feels like a recipe for a brain tumor. Splatoon 3's biggest win is the new Salmon Run. Well, "new" isn't really accurate since its mostly the same thing as Splatoon 2's mode. However, Splatoon 3 surprised millions and soared above the competition with just one innovative tweak and trick - throwing golden eggs with the A button.
And with that, Salmon Run can be played far more offensively, letting you run around all over the place with your Tri-Slosher while throwing eggs into the net from the lower level of the map. And my golly, when I nail a buzzer beater where the last second egg throw into the net just meets the quota to move onto the next level, I felt more comfortable with parting $20 a year for Nintendo Online than I ever have. Until the next communication error, of course.
6. Dark Souls III (PC)
Dark Souls III, the fifth Demon's Souls game and the fourth game on my Soulsborne list, was made for me by the Abyss Watchers. My experience with those guys is what these games are all about. A brutal challenge which I throw myself at time and time again, originally feeling so hopeless and beaten but gradually growing in both skill and confidence to conquer your fears and goals. Dark Souls III is also made by the Dancer of the Boreal Valley, a beautiful fight befitting of its name in which your rolls and R1 presses must fit in tandem with the bosses enveloping swings and spins. When judging Soulsborne boss fights, DSIII is easily my favorite in the series.
And on the quality of those bosses DSIII sits here on my list. Because the rest of the game is kind of forgettable. Maybe it was just Souls fatigue that did this to me but I really don't remember a whole lot beyond the bosses from this game. I remember the one terrible swamp area that felt like dragging my foot through a... mud... puddle. And I remember the area that was kind of black and white that looped back around on itself. That's about it though, and this Souls fatigue kind of bleeds into the overarching themes of the game, it seems like. This world needed to die, leaving it all in the past to chart new territory. Dark Souls is over, but it's spirit will continually revive into greater things.
5. Cuphead: Delicious Last Course (PC)
I have only played Cuphead as a multiplayer experience. Over the summer of 2019, my roommate and I gorged ourselves in Cuphead's challenge and aesthetic. He would wake me up at around 11am, staring with loving yet needy eyes which told me to get my ass up and back at the setup. Much like Risk of Rain 2, the joy of accomplishment feels all the sweeter when shared, and the journey to get there all the more fun. We even learned the Cuphead barbershop quartet jingle, singing it on the way to Frenchi's to the bereavement of passers by.
At the end of our journey, I distinctly remember feeling excited for the new DLC level to release, as at that point it was scheduled to drop later that year. Less than a year turned into three, and by the time the Cuphead DLC launched for a measly $8, I knew we needed to get together again to experience the heights of beating the piss out of bees and carrots yet again.
Cuphead's Delectable Lone Continuation is, put simply, more Cuphead. It didn't necessarily set to light the world ablaze like last time, but as a fun revisit of the mechanics and aesthetic, DLC was everything I could have wanted. We certainly didn't find it as hard as the end of the base game, given we beat everything within two sessions and five hours. But perhaps we have simply grown as gamers, and as men, since our last time at cartoon town.
4. Spark the Electric Jester 3 (PC)
Spark hit the big time this year, notable since it was the first time the Yellow Lanky Brown-Coated Hat Wearing Clown Man has ever hit my purview. Taken on its own, Spark 3 is an impressive feat for a single developer, as high speed 3D platformers are a tough mix to develop for. You have to simultaneously create large, sprawling landscapes for the characters to traverse through, while being keenly aware that the world is often going to be breezed by in a matter of seconds.
But taken as a culmination of developer Lake Feperd's body of work over the past decade, forged in the fangame scene before tackling the challenges and expectations of original IP, Spark 3 rises ever higher. Comparing footage of the game's two predecessors reveals a steady forming of confidence in how to make games that feel and, more importantly, flow like this. With controls that propel the titular character seamlessly to impressive speed, and level design that facilitates such high speed without becoming too much of a straight line. Developers with higher budgets have been treading this line for years, and often fail to hit the peaks of this wondrous adventure.
High speed doesn't define Spark though, as a character and as a game. There's a lot of thought put into how each level fits into the overarching world. You're not just running through levels for the fun of it, these are genuine places that are inhabited by people. If you stray off the linear path to collect any of the colored coins scattered through each level, you'll find each area is fleshed out beyond the point of necessity. The story is surprisingly deep and moving for a game of this style, with twists and turns that call into question the world you've just blazed through. More than anything, Spark feels like a labor of love, and hopefully that love is reciprocated.
3. The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords Adventures (Dolphin)
It's easy to take for granted the emulation paradise we're currently experiencing. Nearly every console ever developed has at least some group of passionate hobbyists working to preserve that hardware and software library therein to players and developers for years to come. Even modern consoles like the Switch and PS4 have impressive emulation solutions right now, with undoubtedly more progress to be made in the coming years.
Most impressively, though, is Dolphin. A combined emulator of the GameCube and Wii consoles, Dolphin has been polished to a mirror's shine. Nearly every game worth playing on these two systems have been made fully compatible, with remaining loose ends being closed every day. If Dolphin closed up shop five years ago, it would still be among the most feature complete emulators to this day, but the continued progress is nothing short of inspiring.
No emulation experience has left me in awe more than when me and three other friends played Four Swords Adventures earlier this year. By linking Dolphin and another GBA emulator (mGBA), utilizing the built in Netplay features in Dolphin to connect to each other, and remapping our controls to better suit modern pads, we were able to play one of the most chaotic, insane, well paced, and ultimately fun co-op experiences Nintendo has ever made. While the original game was hampered by insane accessibility concerns (four GBAs for crying out loud!) and has not been ported officially to anything since, this emulation solution has blown the door open for future players to experience this multiplayer masterpiece well into the future.
2. Elden Ring (PC)
There was no doubt FromSoftware's latest game would hit this list, as it has and will do for the lists of thousands of gaming-obsessed wannabe writers over these past and future months. It's very concept left people in want - an open world Dark Souls game with the highest production values and development time in the Soulsborne semi-franchise. These games' following has progressed far beyond cult, as Elden Ring and its impact caused these games to hit the mainstream. Reverberations of which caused me and my friends to embark on our Souls experience in the preceding months. Along the journey, we fell in love with what was on offer - the world, the design, the challenge, the community, and the sense of achievement, specifically on my end, of finally putting a series that I always knew I would love solidly into one of my favorites.
All roads lead to May, when everyone I knew was either already playing or had just started playing Elden Ring. The experience of early Limgrave is something really special, and it remains my favorite part of the game. Truly no path in this early area is the wrong path. Each story and journey embarked is entirely unique to each of the millions of players. Open world games rarely get this unique part of their appeal; playing games like Spider-Man this year only reinforced this perspective. While each player is bounded to come across some of the same things, the pure scale and density of the world is something to behold, and to experience everything requires commitment and time.
But often, when beholding the monolith of something seemingly insurmountable, motivation is fleeting. Admittedly, after getting through Leyndell and conquering Morgott, I simply ran out of gas. It should have come as no surprise, given I had been gorging myself in Souls content for the preceding months and that Elden Ring on average takes around three times the hours to complete compared to the preceding titles. I took a three month long break from completing its remaining areas, in which even when I got there, I was struck by the quality difference between the early and end game. This is to take nothing away from what Elden Ring achieved, though, and the experience I had playing it. Ultimately, it's an experience I'm glad I had, particularly at the end of my Souls journey. But as the months went on, my experience with Elden Ring was not what stuck with me as the peak of my gaming year.
1. Bloodborne (PS4)
I bought a PS5 to play this game. I've owned Bloodborne for many years, with my first experience occurring in 2015. My time with the game was short, as very soon afterward I was whisked off to college without a PS4 to play with. But much like how the experience of trekking through the Undead Burg and Parish is still baked into my skull even years after first attempting it, I will never forget my first run through Central Yharnam. That packed alleyway full of damned locals wielding nothing but their bare fists and torches to light the way, dimly lit and dankly produced with the pronounced, overwhelming horror of a gothic town gone mad with sickness and death, remains the most striking opening to a Souls game FromSoft has ever made.
I didn't get much further than the Father Gascoigne fight before I stopped playing that first time, but something about those early hours kept drawing me back to Bloodborne. Even when I was pitch broke and jobless in college, I would frequently check for the price of PS4 Slims on Facebook Marketplace to see if I could get one for close to $100. While the PS4 has a great library, with tons of quality titles that I would like to play at some point, only one made me eventually pull the trigger when money was right.
And here I was, March of 2022, having bested Dark Souls 1 and 2 and becoming innately familiar with the Souls series, finally sitting in front of my obnoxiously high latency television that was stating the Bloodborne title screen. At last, I was ready to give this experience another crack. And of course, a master at gaming and gameplay that I am, I still got rocked at this same Central Yharnam graveyard. As I soon learned, knowledge of previous Souls games actually isn't that much of an advantage. You don't play Bloodborne like Dark Souls, a fact I was harshly reminded of going straight from DSII to BB to DSIII. It's been repeated to the point of chronic eye pain at this point, but the lack of shields in Bloodborne really makes a difference in how you trudge through it. This lack of instant defensive options combined with the regain system of getting back health upon hitting an enemy, the insane number of quality trick weapons at your disposal, and the complete lack of things like slow rolling and armor upgrades forces players to approach combat scenarios not so much as a studious, opportunistic Dark Souls player but as a ravenous hound, thirsty for carnage and blood vials.
Which, even in context of the game world, makes sense. You aren't a cursed undead trying to escape a rotten world by resetting the cycle of anguish, escaping this cruel engagement through wits rather than brawn. You're coming here. To this ruinous city on its most vile, violent occasion. The utter definition of eldritch, cosmic horror which unravels slowly and grotesquely as the game progresses. You, in your pride, come here to cure illness. And in your attempt, you find yourself adapting to match the furor and intensity of the beasts you fight in your path. Even if a cure can be found here (it can't), the sickness you receive in return can't be worth the trouble. Beasts all over the shop...
I usually don't think of games like this. I have what my goofy favorite YouTuber NakeyJakey calls goopy goblin gamer brain, a sickness which makes you compare every video game to Super Mario. Gameplay comes first and foremost; it doesn't really matter how it all comes together as long as the core is solid. So perhaps its because Bloodborne quite simply can't get out of my head months after completing it that puts it at the top of my list. The more I think about the experience in its totality, the more in awe I feel of it. Games like Bloodborne are not created by pure artistic competency or raw man hours put in. There needs to be a certain alignment of the moon and amygdala to have something so horrific and beautiful exist on our revolving hellfire.
My "New Year's Rockin' Wish" is for Bloodborne to release on PC, if for no other reason than for my friends to play it. They helped me get over the hurdles needed for me to enjoy this series, so they more than deserve to experience what I believe to be the crowning achievement of the FromSoftware catalog. But if Mark Sony hates God and mocks death as much as I think he does, he will continue restricting access of Bloodborne to a sub-30 FPS experience even on my $500 white rectangle. And for this, my gamer brainiacs, he will go to, and burn in, hell.
Thanks!!!!!!!!!!!
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