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#First time ive ever admitted i dont actually WANT to do anything lmao... Every offical person and even my mom i just say i guess i want to
mrfoox · 3 years
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'so what would you like to do (as work)? If you could get to do anything, without anything holding you back?'
Me, sweating bc I haven't dreamt of a job since I was 7 and wanted to be a dentist: haha
#miranda talking shit#My therapist really is trying but honey... I havent decided if i want to be alive yet....#'uh... Nothing ... My solve reason id ever work would be from guilt and necessity. I have nothing id want to do. I dont WANT to finish#High school but it is basically an requirement for any low paying job here so its basically a given... I myself have no want or drive to#Work or study (: (i can barely force myself to do things i enjoy and struggle greatly with basic things like food exercise and balance irl)'#First time ive ever admitted i dont actually WANT to do anything lmao... Every offical person and even my mom i just say i guess i want to#Finish high school.... Just so they get some answer and think a little more of me lol#The older i get the more honest im becoming and the more depressing my existence is....#'miranda you have on paper by doctors that you are depressed and too sick to work and is allowed to be home . Its not something you should#Be ashamed for. Youre not doing anything wrong its just how it is right now. You have the right to do that ' haha... Ok but we both know im#Hogging tax payers money and should have been eliminated long ago but okay haha#Mentioned like... Another type of therapy where one goes out to do things they want to do and then will be able to get energy to do things#They dont want to do (chores etc etc) and im like... Uh... Ok but i feel too guilty to even play video games which is my hobby and when i do#I kinda just feel guilty instead of enjoying it uh... But ...... Uh.... Yeah#Everything just tires me. Like the idea of some kind of work or even just events to go out of the house just sounds exhausting#Like that would be like the school environment which i have always struggled with! Even if school had no grades and was all just a place kid#Went to hang out I'd not want to go. Id be uncomfortable and still feel like shit. Less like shit but still shit?#And its hard to explain to people bc theyre like ah yes you struggle with the expectations set on you only i see#Like naw dawg i have to perform socially and be in an uncomfortable environment for 6+ hours and have to be on guard every minute#Among 95% of people i dont like or want to be around AND THEN forced to work and concentrate and shit#The situation in itself is just . .. Awful. I never did great in school but i still passed with at least E-D in all subjects... And that#I did without like... Doing any research or homework one need to 'study' for... Because i tried it for one period and none of my teachers#Seemed to notice it and i didn't do better so like... Why spend 90% more of your mental energy if the end results is still the same as when#You just swing it? Im not smart and im sure i could 'do better' and manage something if i actually wanted to do it or someone helped me#But like that ship has sailed. I got way off track and lost my point but uh i just ... Hate the social aspect of school and since our sociey#Is mostly built in that way unless you work at some small business or such its uh... I cant see myself ever enjoying working...#Negative
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strayology · 5 years
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About me tag ~
Rules : Answer the questions and tag 10 people
tagged by my fave kachuuuu thank youuuuu
(yeah i haven’t been on for a while,, i’ve been busy with school and i’ve been kinda feeling sick being on social medias but oh well what else can i do for past time?)
1. How tall are you?
I stand a wholly 162cm or 5′3″ (yeah i have always thought I was 5′4″ but I remeasured and I was 5′3″ ;-;)
2. What color are your eyes?
black like the deep dark abyss of a black hole :’)
3. What color and style is your hair?
black,, it’s straight and I style it a couple of ways depending on my mood or outfit. most of the time I wear it down or in a ponytail
4. Do you wear glasses?
yep i do,, sometimes I wear my prescriptions color contacts because my outfit looks better without glasses lol
5. Do you have braces?
nope never did, but surprisingly my teeth are really straight??
6. What’s your fashion sense?
I usually go for more of a sporty or girl crush style. I like wearing loose fitting clothes that are baggy and long (especially on the arm but my arms are so long so sometimes its hard to find stuff that are normal length for the body and long sleeves for my arms) but once in a while i wanna feel cute so i wear a dress or skirt or something, but I feel like i can’t move freely in those lol
and I do tend to dress more in a korean style (apparently that’s the reason why a lot of people have mistaken me as korean)
7. Full name?
ummmmmm... I guess this is the first time i’m admitting on here that my real name isn’t yumi...??????
but it’s,, Yumi Yee
8. When were you born?
October 24th, 2001
9. Where are you from and where do you live?
I was born in the US but I grew up in China and i currently reside in the US 
10. What school(s) do you go to?
As of right now i’m in a 4-year high school, but I also go to a career and tech school for my computer science classes
11. What kind of student are you?
ehhhhh the one that procrastinates but still tries to get work in on time. i mean i dont really like doing my school work for any classes i dont like, and I would procrastinate as long as possible and still meet the deadline. but for classes i like i will try my best to do work right away and perfect it (which usually make people call me a try hard lol)
12. Do you like school?
i mean i like it when i get to see my friends and learn about subjects that actually interest me and let me have fun in
13. Fav subject?
math, chemistry, foreign language (I took spanish), and computer science
14. Fav TV shows?
I don't watch a lot of shows but I watched The Office couple months ago and I love that
15. Fav books?
The Percy Jackson series (although I haven’t finished it oOps), the Paisley Hanover series, and i like quite a lot of poetries (I’m still reading some from these books I bought a while ago, but once I finish i will see if I wanna recommend or not)
16. Fav pastimes?
cooking/baking, reading chinese comics (I recently got into them and they are sooooo good), listening to music, watch youtube, online shopping, editing (sometimes), mess around with the html codes on my blog, and sleeping
17. Do you have any regrets?
bwahahah way too many,, but if those events never happened in my life I probably wouldn't be who I am today
18. Dream job?
being a translator or any jobs dealing with computer science (mainly web designer)
19. Would you ever like to be married?
i mean yeah, but I have never imagined my own wedding or anything but I do know I wanna get married at 28???
20. Would you like to have children?
yeah,, again i’ve never really thought about this because all ive been thinking about is what kind of job i want or how i’m gonna live with my friends or s/o after college
21. If so, how many?
maybe 1 or 2
22. Do you like shopping?
OHHHHHHH HECK YEAAAAAAAAAH,, i seriously think I have an addiction because i always wanna go shopping and I constantly want new clothes or go to the mall in general. and even if I dont get anything at the mall I like to try on different outfits and take pictures in them
23. What countries have you visited?
Well I didn’t really visit these countries but I did live in them,, China and the US
24. Scariest nightmare you’ve ever had?
literally every one of my dreams I remember is a nightmare lmao
I mean this dream isn’t really scary because it didn’t scare me that much,,
(BUT IM GONNA PUT A WARNING RIGHT HERE BECAUSE I DID TALK ABOUT BLOOD SO IF YOURE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT SCROLL PAST THIS PART NOW)
it was around when I was 8 years old. it was in my old house, and I was sleeping in my room and I woke up alone on my giant king size bed (yeah I used to sleep with my mom for a while because our room arrangements got messed up) nobody was home because I didn’t hear any sounds, but i saw on the wall that was next to me was starting to drip blood. I wanted to go out of my room to see what was going on, so I stepped out and saw the house was empty, and all i heard was loud dog barking noises. I was terribly afraid of dogs so i ran back into my room and yeah the blood was still dripping but i woke up right then
25. Any enemies?
oOps I have too many of them. I’m the kind of person who kinda knows what I want from a friendship, and also knows what I don’t want. So if I see anyone who has any of those traits I dont want I end my friendship with them right then and there. and if someone who i see is being rude, then I just remember who they are and never try to be around them ever
26. Do you have a significant other?
nope and probably never will :’)))))
27. Do you get along with your family?
for the most part yeah, I mean my parents and I argue once in a while over something stupid and I'll just avoid them for like 2 days to a week. but my siblings and I are super well now especially because they all posted something about us on national siblings day when I thought they wouldn't lmao
28. Do you believe in miracles?
I think I do,, I am a huge believer on luck and stuff. so yes I do believe in miracles and I think miracles do happen
29. How are you?
well today is easter and I was supposed to go on a date, but it got canceled last minutes and I’m kinda upset about it since I was dressed and all. but I feel bad for being about upset because the other person might be actually in medical danger so I tried not to think too much about it by doing photoshoots outside my backyard and i think I may or may not have a potential for stay selca day 👀 (I haven’t done a selca day since maybe october/november of 2017,, and it was an igot7selcaday)
tagging: @jxsng @hwangwhatjin @hwanginthere @sunflowerseungmin @honey-innie @jinniesmeow @wangjyunhao @ughh-m @fluffylix @hjsracha 
Of course youre not obligated to do this if you dont want to !!
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s3venpounds · 5 years
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1-64. 65 What is the worst thing you have ever done to a friend?
65 questionsssssssssss yeeeeeeeeee boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii letsss fucking goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo thanks for the ask btw! also sorry for late reply
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?
honestly sometimes, the whole “ life is a simulation” got me kinda scared ya never know
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?
1. because im not afraid of the dark im afraid of what can be in it that im not aware of
3. The person you would never want to meet?
idk. cuz if i say someone i hate then i can’t physically meet them to punch them
4. What is your favorite word?
love
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?
idk whichever lives for millions of years i wanna be like those giant ass trees that you see in animes that are like whole cities wide
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?
should i finally cut my hair? or do i perservere
7. What shirt are you wearing?
my ed sheeran concert shirt
8. What do you label yourself as?
someone with the capacity of good but chooses to be an asshole
9. Bright room or dark room?
bright room
10. What were you doing at midnight last night?
seeing if my new friends were playing games so i can join
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?
21
12. Who told you they loved you last?
off the top of my head? my mom pretty sure. 
13. Your worst enemy?
myself, my fears, hesitation and past mistakes?
14. What is your current desktop picture?
its a picture of hinata shoyo from Haikyuu!! doing a spike with wings on his back!
15. Do you like someone?
yes.
16. The last song you listened to?
Jacob Lee Slip
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
trump
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
trump. and i want like brass knuckles when i punch. 
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?
probably a volleyball coach/ trainer or a professional volleyball player to just drill basics into me and make me a better player. (that or just gal gadot to like help me clean up my life and give me life advice)
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)
i guess my energy? its a fucking mess though cuz sometimes i get tired after like 4 minutes of activity but then sometimes i get like a second wind and i just go for hours 
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?
i mean there was that snapchat trend of every guy making a female version of themselves so i guess theres that. i would definitely try anything i could. periods, cramps, catcalls, masturbating anything i could so i truly understand what women have to go through every day of their lives
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?
im a very open person so most of my obscure talents are known but i am kinda proud of how i can name pokemon by just hearing their cries limited to like the first 3 generations tho lmao
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?
what happens after we die
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.
i wanna make the most bougie sandwich in the world. I want abelone, puffin, black truffle, caviar, just all that super high end shit
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?
save it. im going on a trip somewhere out of the city and i could use the extra pocket money
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?
venice italy. no question.
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?
oh shit booze! i love me some booze! i guess it would have to be like smirnoff kissed caramel vodka, or this one whiskey i saw a video of irish people drinking american whiskeys
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? 
dont be a fucking dickhead idk. i can’t make concrete rules cuz theres loopholes
29. What is your favorite expletive?
definitely fuck just because i say it more than actual normal words
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?
haha “loved ones” lmao. oh uhhh my letters from D.O when we were kids. that or my journal
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
my dads abuse. oh wait no then thats free forgiveness for him lmao no uhhh one of my past relationships. it was a mess and i still struggle a little with it
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!
Venice italy. that or greece or rome idk. i really like their aesthetic with small white houses, small walkways and all that
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
Steve irwin or Robin williams. or just to make a couple people near me happy, Kyle Fundytus
34. What was your last dream about?
uhhh I kissed the person I’m currently interested in. not just a normal dream too I felt everything. it was crazy. Felt, their hands, warmth, lips, body against mine and even their skin it was just magical.
35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?
boyfriend? honestly? idk. i’d like to think that i am but from what I know apparently im not
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?
yes and no? i guess? i had one of those shots you give to enfants when their family is moving to a new country and i still have the scar so possibly? i mean technically any baby born in a hospital has been admitted to one lmao
37. Have you ever built a snowman?
YES AND SOME OLDER KIDS BROKE IT DOWN AND USED IT AS A BENCH . I fought them and got sent tot he principals office
38. What is the color of your socks?
im not wearing any.... but i do have a favourite pair of green ones that have a print of pringles sour cream n onion on it!
39. What type of music do you like?
Jazz, big band, kpop, RNB, rap, rock, swing music, electro...? sort of?
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
i can’t choose, I love both and have fond memories of both
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?
Vanilaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa maybe some caramel in it
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)
uhh i dont know much about football but i can say i would support my local team edmonton eskimos
43. Do you have any scars?
a ton! i love em! its like the sentimental stuff i keep in my closet but on my body and i always trace my finger over them whenever im just in the mood to reminisce
44. What do you want to be when you graduate?
im not currently taking the courses i need to get my dream job but i’d love to be a power ranger either the stunt double or the cheesy actor. that or a school councilor
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
how dependant i am on others. i hate it. if i was alone i dont think i’d survive. i need other people
46. Are you reliable?
I like to think that i am though again, you’d have to ask my friends
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
Did you find her?
48. Do you hold grudges?
hell.yes. if you couldnt tell i reallllllllllly hate my dad. like really.
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?
whatever animals it takes to make dragons a thing again
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?
I would have to say when this random stranger came up to me to complain about the transit system because the one in vancouver was so much better apparently. dude went on a 20 minute rant and i just drowned him out with music and pretended to “pause” my music while nodding like i understood
51. Are you a good liar?
not sure. I think i am considering my parents dont know half the shit i did AHEHEHEHE
52. How long could you go without talking?
couple days. long as i got my music.
53. What has been you worst haircut/style?
god there was this one christmas where my parents gave me like a stereotypical suburban kid hair cut where the whole head is like flattened with hair gel the at the forehead its just a tall wall of spiked hair. BUT HERES THE KICKER. they dyed half the wall red and half green for christmas. god it was awful
54. Have you ever baked your own cake?
does cheesecake cupcakes count?
55. Can you do any accents other than your own?
ive been told i can do a good russian one, chinese too
56. What do you like on your toast?
nutella omg. fresh toast with gooey nutella? god its so good
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?
uhmmm some secret stuff for a friends personal project
58. What would be you dream car?
Dodge Viper
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.
I love singing in the shower when no ones home. I can only sing when no ones home cuz the walls in this house are thin AS FUCK. 
60. Do you believe in aliens?
i believe we’re not the only ones out here but due to how we’re literally killing our own kind and planet for no good reason they choose to ignore us
61. Do you often read your horoscope?
yep! all the time! whenever i get my hands on the local paper i read my horoscope while i wait on the train or if theres a horoscope thing on tumblr!
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?
X idk x is just cool
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?
dragons are you kidding me? dragons are dinosaurs that can fly. AND BREATHE FIRE
64. What do you think about babies?
I dont think im a good father figure but spending time with kids is a pretty okay time for me long as its not long term lmao 
65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.
What is the worst thing you have ever done to a friend?
I punched them full force in the stomach for calling me emo. it was a bad day but lo and behold that person became my best friend loooooooooooool
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