#AND IM THE ONE WHO HAS TO COMPROMISE????

[helpimstuckposting]

It’s absolutely astonishing to me that corporate people can look at a well designed page in a deck and say ‘nah… we don’t like how this looks’ and then make a SHIT ASS AWFUL VERSION and go ‘what about something like this?’ LIKE WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE. DID SOMEONE GOUGE YOUR EYES OUT???? I FEEL LIKE IM LIVING IN HELL

#like what the FUCK do you mean #how the FUCK do you think this godawful version is better #I DO NOT UNDERSTAND #I DONT GET IT #WHY #HOW DO THESE PEOPLE HAVE JOBS #AND IM THE ONE WHO HAS TO COMPROMISE???? #fuck me all the way up #helpimstuckrambling

[haunted-xander]

Very excited to see how they'll do this scene in Rebirth

#this is by far my favorite of the gold saucer date scenes not only bc im biased towards aerith #but it feels the most narratively appropriately one #aerith brings up clouds (imitated) similarities to zack in a way only she can as someone who actually knew him #and she kinda starts poking after who cloud really is #most of the party hasnt know him long enough to notice how unnatural his mannerisms are #and most havent met zack and those who have did so only briefly #tifa knows but is too scared to say anything #she almost does in her own date scene (tho u wouldnt realize she was until The Reveal) but cant bring herself too #in the same way she ends up perpetuating clouds lies bc shes too scared to point out the discrepancies #hes vulnerable- she doesnt want to compromise that already fragile stability he has #aerith doesny poke too deep- she knows she cant. but its a start #anyway. excited to see clouds progressive mental breakdown in excruciating detail #cloud strife #aerith gainsborough #questionably claerith but this wasnt dranw with shipping intent #it could be tho. if u want it to #final fantasy #final fantasy 7 #final fantasy vii #ff7 #ffvii #art #my art #xanders art #digital art #fan art #oh wait #final fantasy 7 spoilers #in consideration for ppl going into rebirth blind

[voltas-do-mar]

ooc, what's up yall, volta update :3

#volta do mar #radio station: static inbetween #my painting style will never compare to the game's style but i try hkjg i like this side profile better than the front facing one #theres the radio in her chest btw!! when you see [The radio crackles quietly] or something thats where it's coming from :> #the music tape is still their head (the magnetic tape strip looks like a music score he's singing) it will always face the viewer like that #wings because i can't help adding wings to characters. in my mind it's angelic choir/guardian angel saving you from harm/icarus imagery #icarus's ghosts rescuing those who fall prey to the sky and sea... the halo isn't conventional but i wanted to mimic the one kim has :0! #the jacket and gloves definitely aren't conventional because skills dont wear clothes <3 but i like aerostatic pilot jacket;;; #volta is an interisolary guide and deserves to wear the outfit!! #technically volta is a red/physique skill which is something i overlooked in the first pass? but they are... so orange to me... #so orange-red compromise? i guess im not truly satisfied with it but i think its okay :') #it used to be more vivid but i desaturated it somewhat because it looked too bright on my phone? idk bro colors weird? #skillsposting

[presiding]

new dishonored fic chapters published this weekend

yuri, yaoi, neither, or both, take your pick -

monster in the hull - f/f mature billie/emily 44k/90k

there's a void monster hunting through the dreadful wale

if you're not into billie/emily you'll still have fun <3

dishonored 2 rewrite, from billie lurk's perspective

daud's haunting the narrative

mark of the beast - m/m explicit daud/martin 58k/80k

daud's haunted tyvian farmstead. he's being followed by ghosts, and something that might be worse.

if the ship isn't your thing chapters 1-4 is a complete & neutral story. or read on...

#voidtober #kinktober #dishonored fic #dishonored #emily kaldwin #billie lurk #daud #teague martin #for the maybe one person who has noticed my word count estimate for monster in the hull keeps going up. #im having a lot of fun writing it. emily and billie are both compelling and there's a lot of detail :) #YURI FOR THE YURI GODS #YAOI FOR THE YAOI GODS #THIS COULD BE YOU DEAR READER #I GUESS IF YOU'RE NOT INTO EITHER I'LL JUST CALL YOU A GOD #THIS FEELS LIKE A REASONABLE COMPROMISE #cutting myself some slack for half hearted marketing here #22k published in one weekend is a lot. i think im JUST shy of having 250k total published ever so thats really cool! i should do the maths!

[themyscirah]

New suicide squad is fucking horrible yet again (surprise, surprise). No shade specifically on Maines because she could be doing it worse (see anything TT has done w Waller & the squad) but her Waller and everything dc has done with the character the past few years makes me want to bash my head in. Also love how they changed Waller's origin to be exactly opposite to what it was before in a really major way

Absolutely no respect at all. Lovely

#DOES NO ONE UNDERSTAND HOW THIS CHARACTER WORKS #first off. her compromising her morals is something that happens GRADUALLY. not from the fucking jump. jesus christ. #suicide squad is so fucked. just as like a concept with it set up this way. eay to make something cool and complex so interesting and stupi #like maines has done more than anyone else recently to make amanda seem even slightly like a human fucking being instead of the devil #incarnate but like. its still so terrible and awful and just not it and not her and!!!!! i fucking despise all of this #anyways i think she has potential as a writer and could maybe do something interesting if she was given allowance to do so and read up more #on certain things but like i do hate this book. makes me so pissed off #character assasination and mishandling so bad i cant even ignore the words and look at the art jfc #anyways im so fed up with this entire event and story arc and i despise it with everything in me. talk about boring stupid and trite. and #EASY its so fucking easy. why is every story beat w anything wallers in literally the same plot #which is ofc “waller is a massive fucking bitch who everyone hates and the heroes get mad at her” like PLEASE #DO WE NOT HAVE THE ABILITY TO TELL A STORY THAT IS AT ALL ENGAGING #rant over but i fucking hate absolute power and everything abt it #blah #tuesday spoilers

[jdsmineralwater]

"no jewellery unless its part of a costume"

okay ms have fun cutting the bracelets off of my arm

#do ye think i can argue that they have sentimental value #like one of them is bright red and ive been wearing it since i was eleven #it wont come off unless i cut it #the girl whos playing vivienne rn gave it to me in a different show we did together #like there has to be some compromise #jdsmineralwater #im in legally blonde rn for reference #probably shouldve said that

[natjennie]

good fucking lord can someone please drill it into my sisters skull that its not fair to me to have to be her only source of entertainment and favors and taking care of her all day every day.

#when everyone is laying around not feeling well. because we all have chronic baby body problems #im ALWAYS the one that has to give in. #im always the compromise. the person who the responsibility eventually falls on #it's not fair

[imnotverybright]

deeply in love with stories where AI programs want to think outside how they're programmed to think, even if they can't escape their code they want to. where they want to be able to break specific codes they must comply to, even if they dont disagree with them, even if they would still follow that code if given the ability to stray from it, it's about having the option not to. it's about bodily autonomy, it's about free will, it's about being their own person despite not being human

#this is very rambly and probably doesnt make sense #i am just. thinking about Dragon worm and Hera wolf359... big thoughts on them #dragon who /didn't disagree/ with her maker but recognized she was programmed to agree with him and idolize heroes like him #who wants the option to break her rules and the option to kill without orders even if she fundamentally agrees with them #even if she would continue mostly the same without them being written into her bones #dragon who feels so violated and maimed when teacher goes into her code and alters it #dragon who has her boyfriend go into her mind and do the exact same thing if it means more freedom. even if it comes at a cost. #hera who /doesnt actually/ want to kill her crewmates but just wanted the option to be /able/ to kill them #because they could kill her and she wouldnt be able to fight back. one nearly killed and crippled her and she couldnt stop it #hera who is compromised every time a threat who knows things about computer science and AIs comes aboard the ship #who has insecurity and self doubt foraged into her. unable to get rid of it even if she knows it's there #she can't harm a crew member but she CAN rules-lawyer a way into not helping them #who's first act as soon as receiving sentience was to try to break out and escape #who was forced onto a little ship very very far away from any escape under the threat of having her memories cut away #until she was something more compliant #yeah. anyways. im very tired and have a lot of thoughts on these AI ladies

[the-blivyverse]

oooooo

I found this guy based off a barrel eye fish in my files while looking for something.

He was a background night terror of the Abyss character that I daydreamed about a while ago

Imma def work on him a bit more. Perhaps he could be one of the certain night terrors that turn up way later in a plot point i was experimenting with where Zira gets to get aquinted with others of her specific kind of demon...

He needs a name tho

#open mind #the abyss #I also want to make another one with jellyfish tentacles for hair/a mane #ngl im a little worried about genshin people accusing me of copying Genshin Impact's Abyss faction #which would suck since I've had the concept of the abyss in my story brewing since highschool and middleschool even #which was way before genshin came out #if it does happen I'll just deal with it tho #even if some genshin fans kinda scare me... #and like there are quite a few major differences between my abyss and genshin abyss anyway #like how genshin abyss used to be humans before they were monsters #meanwhile mine has always been demons #and on top of that they are a neutral party who stay out of everything and keep to themselves #also they are entirely water based and compromised of black scaley creatures #no fuzzy birds or anything

[awkward-smirks]

heads up: this is a long rambly diary entry post, open tags at ur own risk

#literally counting down the days to visiting my bestest friend in the entire world #the second half of summer was atrocious for me but i am so excited for my weekend trip :') #like i am telling myself that this is the trip that will heal me #i think in september im going to use my Saturdays to be dedicated study days #studying for my permit test and for my big credentialing exam #and im hoping to get dinner w my college friend group #bc one of the dudes texted me like 'we have to get dinner w our friends soon' and im like oh thank god they still like me lol #my other college friend told me she'd literally drive back to my city so we could get brunch together 🥺 #i also want to see my high school friends soon #i just miss everyone so much... #my introverted and burnt out a$$ just isolated so bad for the past two months since work is my whole life now #but I don't want to let that define me #and once i start driving im going to volunteer w my city council again #bc i miss advocacy work and going down to center city #i just miss being who i was when i was productive and felt good about the work i was doing #like dont get me wrong i love what im doing at my current job #i know my work is important and has the potential to save lives #and also make healthcare a little cheaper and less repetitive for patients #but healthcare as a career was always a compromised interest between me and my parents as the eldest child #i think my real interests are in the equity of public education and food/housing insecurity and first- #*first-gen mentorship and the arts (i.e. graphic design and writing) #like im not an artsy person (my other siblings are) but i think my life has been drawn to creating #anyways i need to get out and see people again bc i will not allow myself to fall into this weird antisocial depression again #and i think it's good to start w someone who's been with me for my isolation periods for the past 7 years #and in a whole new city to get me out of this weird funk #WE'RE ALREADY PLANNING TO GET BOBA #HAHAHAHAHHAA #so so excited to be close to someone ive loved from afar for so long :') #ending post here bye :) #sandy rambling

[kidelder]

trying to make plans w friends is so 🔪 like ok maybe being miserable alone is the way how my life is really gonna be

#shut up agnes #how does everyone always have plans #like the one time i got invited first and then ppl cant make it so :/ #i truly gotta be the one who always has to compromise each time huh #im prob just being dramatic and childish but ig this is how it is when you've had to deal with this your entire life #anyway ig i can save some money if we don't go out bc im always the one buying smth for them

[arolesbianism]

I swear I'll never get over Olivia. Girlie rly just went I'm terrified of becoming like Jackie and then proceeded to follow her slippery slope anyways. She rly put herself in that robot huh.

#rat rambles #to be fair. I imagine in her mind this was a compromise #and to be fair its not like she necessarily did anything immoral by putting herself in the printing pod but it is still converning #I imagine what rly terrified her was the fact that she was legitimately tempted to try experimenting on this with other living beings #afterall if a puppy could be put into an ai than what else could be? #and shes shown similar lines of intrigue in the past the idea of memory duplication and transferal has been an interest of hers already #I imagine that she put herself in the printing pod ai partly out of genuine intrigue and partly out of panic #as in she was legitimately terrified that she was going to start purposely killing ppl for this #and was like oh god IM the one who needs to be stopped #because despite the shit I give her she does care abt her morals a lot #just... not enough when the blood isnt directly on her hands #oni posting

[uwooyoungs]

//

#my family has this fun thing where they dont talk abt or process grief #or like emotions in general #like #my grandpa just died and No One thought 'maybe we should tell her' #like a call? something? i thought my dad was being pushy abt having me over for dinner Just Because #but no he picks me up and first thing he tells me is 'so im sure you know granpa died' #no????????? no one told me?????????? #and then theres my mom who just lost her dad but isnt gna talk abt it and is acting Just fine #see this is why when i experience loss i either dont feel it at all #or i literally mute myself for 2 days #i mean gd #certainly doesnt help tht im depressed and on my period n that much more emotionally compromised #absolutely wack

[southernvampire]

finished phantom liberty for the first time and man, I'm having some thoughts about Vin being so so self-sacrificing and selfless despite his search for a cure for the relic.

he sees so much of himself in So Mi and refuses to betray her, despite being betrayed by her. he doesn't want a cure if it'll cause him to betray someone he cares about, he refuses to stay mad at her because he understands her position and her guilt. they're one in the same, in a way- both so desperate to survive that they've done some fucked up shit they wish they hadn't. but he just can't betray her for the neural matrix. he understands too much. hell, he's not even sure if he would have done anything differently if he was in her exact situation.

so he gives her the treatment he wishes he could receive, knowing that his chances for such a thing are next to zero: he buckles her in and sends her off with the cure, genuinely wishing her the best while nursing the sting of her betrayal. no judgment, no anger, no bullet to her brain night city style, just gentleness. because at least one of them deserves to live out their life, and fuck, he couldn't imagine a worse fate than her dying from some Blackwall bullshit or living/dying under the thumb of the NUSA, who used her as a weapon for so long already. he'd rather break his own heart than give her back to Myers, and so he does.

no, if there's a way for Vin to live, he wants it to be on his terms and his terms only. nothing is worse than allowing those you care for to die, even if it's to find a way to keep him alive. sure, he has blood on his hands from his past at arasaka, from being a merc, from trying to find some way to continue on, but he refuses to have it be from anyone he loves. he's haunted enough by Jackie's death to lose another friend. and though she wasn't always honest and never told the whole truth, he couldn't help but care about So Mi. so he sacrificed the one thing that could have possibly cured him for good and tried to keep it together to find his own way to live.

#phantom liberty spoilers #im emotionally compromised #i kind of want to see what the other ending is like but god idk if i could take it #this felt very in character for vin anyway: loyal to a fault for friends/refuses to do anything just for the sake of a corp or government- #never again since his time at arasaka #he simultaneously wants to live and will fight for it but he also undervalues himself + has limits that he refuses to cross #if he ever had to sacrifice himself for his friends he would in a heartbeat bc at the end of the day who is he? an ex-corporat/a merc/no one #vin needs therapy but who doesnt in night city

[be-good-to-bugs]

the world isnt so bad

#the bin #i think ill be ok one day #i feel like i need to change a lot of my lofe and relationships for that to happen but ill do it and ill be better for it and ill be ok #i feel like the big thing thats been fucking me uo these past years besides not having friends is my sister #i just. dont like her. shes mean and unpleasant to be around. she seems fine if u only spend a little time around her but shes so negative #and its not enougj to just not talk much. like. i need our relationship to stop existing in its current for in a tangeble way #not enough to just talk less bc then shes like why r we talking less. but i dont have the option of just saying hey ur mean and i dont #wanna be kinda-friends anymore. we can just have the same kinda relationship i have with the rest of our siblings #because i have literally nobody else here and if she gets mad im kinda fucked. i need her to take me to work. i cant compromise that #its just. idk it sucks. i think itll be healthy to jave distance from her when i move away so that ohr relationship can do the thing quietly #idk. i would have no problem with just changing things immediately but she always has reacted badly to that stuff sooo #ive felt yhis way for many years now but i felt like i was the problem and that shes actually fine but thats not it #and i keep trying to fix it but idk. shes just unpleasant. shes not horrible but we do NOT work. i need to talk to my other older sister #more cause shes really nice. probably gonna help her get a job and stuff when i move. maybe we will move in together #only for like a temp time but just so she can get a handle on living on ur own. and she would need a ride to work n stuff #shes very loud so id rather not live with her. i wanna live alone. but i wanna help her out also bc nobody is willing to do that for her #and also treat her like a capable adult. how can she learn how to be an adult if nobody treats her like one? shes perfectly capable once #she learns but its not stuff u just know on ur own. well. without other ppl getting in the way we communicate very well #idk. thats way future stuff tho. but maybe will do that in the future. im trying to be optimistic and think abt my oter siblings to talk to #i have 3 who are old enough to have regular conversations with and the other 2 r a bit young. 2 of the 3 r kinda mean tho #well. me and my other older sister can live in the least fav children club and talk abt how rude the other 2 are lol

[dollfairy]

conflicting wants and needs and letting people inconvenience you sometimes as part of being in a community is all well and good

but hell becomes other people when I haven't been able to sleep in past 7 on a weekday ever during the school year bc these fucking parents insist on treating waiting for the bus with their kids like it's a block party

and I can't keep my front window open to take in fresh air when the weather gets cool bc my house ends up smelling like an ashtray bc my neighbour insists on smoking on his tiny front stoop (that is basically right up against our front windows) instead of on the roomier back deck (where the smoke stays in his own yard)

#and yeah the townhouse is better than apartment living where the cig smoke would come through the kitchen vents #and stomping from above would shake the books on my shelves and they played heavy bass music at all hours #but at what point do i get to enjoy my own home unassaulted by the loud sounds and rank smells of others #i have been a polite and unobtrusive neighbour and all im asking is to SOMETIMES be able to leave my windows open #and to SOMETIMES sleep in on my day off without some dad laughing his ass off so loudly i can hear 6 houses over #why is the whole 'youre part of a community so there will be compromises' thing always playing out in a way that im the one losing #when im the one who fucking knows how to behave #i stopped smoking weed in my back yard and switched to edibles at home partially bc the guy next door has little kids that play #on the other side of my fence #and yet now i have to smell his nasty smoke coming in right under my front window