#@ everyone telling me that that isn’t the terf flag the terfs are literally defending it in my notes and calling the inclusive one bad&ugly | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

atinyhours · 4 years

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reaction: ateez s/o being nonbinary

anon: maybe ateez reaction to their s/o being pan and defining themselves as nonbinary (yes okay i literally just described myself)

note: you also described me so!!! uwu anyways a gift bc im avoiding studying for finals. *reminder that this is just my opinion* also ateez doesn’t support terfs, truscum, or transmedicalists :) also this lowkey just turned into ateez as trans rights activists 👉👈

Hongjoong:

he seems like a pretty open guy, spent time learnign about gender and sexuality and sex and the differences

literally doesn’t matter to him what gender you are, as long as you still love him you’re all good

when you tell him he lets you speak before asking any question

prefaces every question with “i don’t want to make you uncomfortable so you don’t have to answer”

if you decide to change your pronouns or name he’s 100% on board

askes you who he can tell and correct when they misgender you bc he doesn’t want to out you or create any dangerous situations

buys you lots of new gender affirming clothes and celebrates small victories with you, like getting correctly gendered in public

he’s your number one hype man

Seonghwa:

he is confused at first

like wtf is a nonbinary, but then you answer his questions and he googles the ones he’s too embarrassed about and BAM everything’s good

honestly as long as you’re still his baby he’s happy

is very aware of the gendered pet names he called you in the past and works very hard to find gender neutral alternatives

starts with normal ones like honey, or little one, but it slowly descends into madness

“hey sweet pancakes” “my lovely cloud” “my favorite cutie patootie booty”

spends time educating the boys so they know how to address you now

he makes sure everyone respects the absolute hell outta you

no misgendering or mean comments here

or seonghwa will beat them up

Yunho:

this boy is the absolute sweetest thing in the entire world

when you come out he’s 100% supportive and ready to help you do whatever he can to help you feel gender euphoric

really just an angel

starts reading up more on trans identities and how he can support the community as a whole

buys trans flags/ nonbinary flags to hang up

he’s just really excited to be there for you and be the best ally he can be

is calm when helping you explain it to others and when you get frustrated he is there to educate when it gets exhausting

the kinda person to then question his own gender and question gender as a social construct entirely and start getting angry at baby gender reveals and color associations and fights back real hard

Yeosang:

we all know yeosang shy, but he’s confrontational

someone fucks up your pronouns, this boy is THERE AND ready to calmy educate as long as people are trying, but fight if they’re disrespectful

obviously gives you all his clothes to wear if you decide you’d like a more masc look, but will take you shopping to buy you a new wardrobe if you decide you want to change the way you present

is always telling people “just bc my s/o looks like *insert sex here* doesn’t mean they’re not nonbinary” “clothing has no gender”

loves you with his whole heart and knows that the boys have his back always if they have to defend you

the kind of person to recommend resources that he can spread to help educate other people

kind smart boy trying to save the world

San:

very loud about your gender and pronouns

not in a dangerous way, he always knows who is around but screaming about how proud he is of you

always has the best intentions but some times gets caught up on things

“but if you don’t believe gender is like a real thing why are you so worried about wearing men’s clothes?”

you have to explain that even though you don’t like gender, the world does and presentation, although it is an individuals choice, you are attempting to appear more *insert gender here* in order to be perceived a certain way

this boy always has questions and criticisms of gender

ready to fight terfs, truscum and transmedicalists

gets in comment fights on the internet and attaches sources to back him up, san is serious as hell about this

Mingi:

confused to start

gender is super confusing anyways but the fact you can be neither/both really sends him overboard

switches name/pronouns right away and works real hard not to slip up

asks lot of questions all the time

“so if gender isn’t on a spectrum, how does it work? like it is a pool of ducks and your gender is a duck just swimming along, no correlation to the other ducks?”

watches a lot of trans youtube videos to further understand

seeing other peoples experience really helps understand you and gender as a concept

king of gender neutral terms and pet names

you’re his royalty and nothing less

Wooyoung:

sweet boy

a sweet lil boy who listens so well and tries his best

buys you things that he knows will make you feel gender euphoric

loves u more than anything in the world

he just really is proud of you for being vocal about your gender and standing up for yourself and educating people

absolute angel boy who has your back

if your relationship with him goes public he makes sure to always talk about your pronouns so its clear what they are

gets angry when the media misgenders you

so vocal about how trans rigths are human rights

always finding new ways to educated himself and the people around him

Jongho:

like san he’s ready to fight anyone who tries to fuck with you

YOU GET A TRANS FLAG ! yOU GET A TRANS FLAG ! THE KITCHEN ! THE LVIINGROOM ! EVERYTHING IS TRANS AND GAY NOW!!

no but really tries his best to show you how supportive he is of you bc he wants you to know that who you are isn’t wrong

he knows the worlds a shitty place, and wants to make you feel safe at home with him

reads up on lgbtq+ rights and things to get a better understanding

uses his public platform to make sure lgbtq+ atinys know they are loved and always safe with ateez

a vocal ally !

he’s just the best boy i am soft now imaging jongho at a pride parade smiling and waving flags and :((((((( my boy

#ateez reaction #ateez #ateez fluff #ateez writing

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zolaliz · 6 years

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Trans v terf discourse:

Hey so I wanted to make a post of my own about the whole terf discourse thing I stumbled upon yesterday and the post I made out of spite today (which I took down, because it was a mistake, and if you saw it I truly, genuinely apologize) and explain a little bit more calmly about the whole thing, about where I'm coming from

Basically I happened upon the account belonging to @/redkatherinee and saw some art that really.. had me shaken up, I guess. It was disturbing, and i felt sick in a way I haven't in a long time. Now I myself am not trans. But I'm going to come out and say that I support trans women, because 1.) I am not ashamed of this, and would never be, and 2.) it's gonna be kinda vital to my whole conversation here. If you are a terf, (trans exclusionary radical feminist for anyone who doesn't know) you might read the sentence before this one and immediately think of my opinion as invalid. You're might (or might not, I don't know) not even bother to read the rest of this. You might start gearing up counter arguments before I even start with my point. That's okay. I am not looking for a fight here. I just want to explain my point of view. If you don't want to listen, if you don't care, if you think I'm wrong, I'm going to politely ask that you don't let me know about it. If you're looking to talk, I'm going to be cautiously open to that. But keep in mind I know the difference between the approaches of someone looking to talk and someone looking to fight. So if you want to send hate or anything else, please refrain. Just as I am going to try to refrain from insulting anybody with this post. Because that's not my intention here. And if I do, I'm sorry.

I'm going to talk about two of @/redkatherinee's art pieces in particular. One displays a witch with a cauldron, with hands reaching out of the boiling liquid, with trans flag bracelets on their wrists. The other displays a women holding a bloodied pie, with eye balls inside it, and a caption that says "terfs literally eat transwomen". Both are drawn in satire. I do believe they were drawn for the purpose of satire, and upon further reading, found out they were drawn because the artist wanted to illustrate how trans supporters and trans people view terfs. Even if they were drawn for satirical purposes, it does not make these images okay. Far from it.

I've always disagreed with terf's stance on transwomen, how they treat them and view them, but I've never seen this hate so openly displayed. Because it wasn't the images that disturbed me, not exactly. It was how I imagined a transwoman stumbling upon them. Maybe this isn't something a terf can empathize with, as some terfs don't see trans women as worthy of empathy, but please try.

If I were a trans woman I would feel beyond despised, I'd feel scared and panicked over how much hatred someone could have to construct those images. To put time and effort into them. The whole thing feels wildly out of hand, but if I had stumbled across those posts as a trans woman, especially without any context provided in the captions, without any context of why the artist drew those (and honestly, even with the context), I'd feel like hiding. I'd feel scared of how someone could have so much hatred towards me. I'd feel angry and start hating in return.

Terfs argue that not all transwomen are good people, and therefore should not be supported. But the truth of this is people can be bad, regardless of sexual orientation, identity, background, opinion. Not all people are good, but that shouldn't mean we stop supporting the ones that are.

For those who say that terfs get hatred and death and rape threats, I am here to say that none of that is okay. Your beliefs do not give others the excuse to be nasty to you. Me included. But you must understand that when you tell others you believe transwomen are rapists and murderers and horrible people, people that don't deserve respect, their first instinct is to lash out (as was mine). It doesn't excuse the behavior, merely explains it.

But you have to understand that this behavior is provoked by someone telling them that their existence is invalid, that it automatically makes them something they may not be. And telling a trans person that they shouldn't exist, that they are wrong, that they are something they aren't- that behavior is inexcusable too.The same way you may feel about people hating terfs, sending them death threats, rape threats, and worse- is what others feel like when they see you excluding trans people and telling people that they don't deserve to exist in the gender they identify with, that they are pedophiles and rapists and murderers themselves. It makes them angry and defensive and scared. It makes them sick and cruel and irrational. It continues the cycle of hate.

But you see the biggest difference between the hate terfs receive and the hate trans people receive is that terfs receive hate because of their beliefs, while trans people receive hate because of their identity. You can change one's beliefs, but no one can change who they are . Trans women are hated because of who they are, their existence, and by excluding them, by targeting them and discriminating against them, you receive hate for your beliefs. Because your beliefs harm others.

Please understand, if you are a terf, in the same way you most likely cannot change your opinions of trans women, these women also can't change who they are. That's right, these women can not change who they are. They aren't men in skirts. They aren't monsters. Because monsters can be monsters regardless of identity or gender, so saying that they are a monster because they are trans is absurd. I wouldn't insult a whole religion for the few who use it to promote hate and ignorance. The actions of some don't speak for the actions for everybody. Everyone, in their own way, is only trying to get by. To live their life as they identify.

Now to people who violently hate on terfs, I was you about six hours ago. Through writing this and after writing this I realized hate isn't the way to approach this. Hate should never be a way to approach anything. Because how on earth do you expect people to even consider your opinion if you approach it with hate? So the telling them to kill themselves and jump off a bridge and die and all that horrible shit, that needs to stop. These are humans, no matter how different their opinions are. No matter how harmful their opinions are. Hurting them back won't help, even if that's your first instinct (as it was mine.)(to be clear though I've never sent a terf a death threat or anything similar). I get it, okay, I really do, but that's not the right way to go about this. This isn't saying that terfs are in the right, or that the hate they receive is anything compared to the decades of discrimination, violence, and worse that trans women have received, but sending them hate won't make the situation any better.

It's exhausting going about it this way and anger and anonymous hate is easier and quicker and makes you feel better- but it won't solve anything.

So to everyone, trans supporters and terfs and trans people themselves- we're all so eager to go at each other's throats, but to take a step back and talk, that could accomplish a lot more. Terfs; maybe a trans woman won't ever be a woman to you, but the least you can do is try and remember that they are a human being. That they aren't defined by anyone else's actions except their own. Trans supporters; you aren't doing the trans people you support any favors by telling terfs to go kill themselves, by calling them disgusting. It comes off badly on the people you're trying to defend. And trans women; I know it's difficult, and I know some terfs won't even give you the time of day- or worse, they do, and they target and harass you. They hate you for your existence, which isn't something you can change (or ever should have to change). So I'm not going to tell you you have to be understanding of people who want you gone, who don't respect you. Talk to them as you see fit, and if they can't talk to you like you're a human, that's on them, and I'm sorry that it being on them doesn't mend the damage done to you by talking to them or being targeted by them.

Respect goes a long way on either end. Stop the death threats, rape threats, suggestions of suicide, exclusion, targeting, and worse.

Hate really doesn't give anyone the high ground. But talking? Talking can help some people reach a middle ground.

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