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#(are you fkn kidding me did i really just delete all the tags i just wrote...)
skitskatdacat63 · 1 year
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I exist only to post pics where I think Seb looks small
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realcube · 3 years
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BABYSITTING WITH HIM
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characters ♡ oikawa, tendou & sakusa
tw ♡ children, cursing & mentions of arson
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TŌRU OIKAWA
♡ he is pretty much a professional babysitter, or so he thought
♡ which is why he accepted when you asked if he could help you take care of your nieces/nephews for the weekend
♡ i mean, he takes care of his nephew all the time so how hard could babysitting possibly be? it was basically a free pass to spend the day with you 
♡ however, he began to regret his decision as he sat on your couch and realised that he wouldn’t be able to get even somewhat intimate with you when there was constantly an annoying little boy clinging to his arm, asking him if he had any games on his phone
♡ “sorry, kid.” oikawa smiled, clenching his jaw to hide the rage but it wasn’t very effective, “i’ve not got any games. maybe you could go play with your toys or something.” 
♡ he let out a sigh, making the mistake of thinking that would be the end of their interaction
♡ “can’t you just download some?” the boy retaliated
♡ you snickered, watching as the energy visibly drained from oikawa, yet he still wore his frighteningly bright grin
♡ “i’ve not got any storage.” 
♡ “then delete some of your apps or photos.” the boy said with a shrug, then proceeded to point at oikawa’s home screen, which happened to be a picture of him and you in front of an ethereal sunset, “start with that one. you both look like dorks.”
♡ you and oikawa’s unified gasps of offence were enough to show the boy that he was able to do exactly what he intended; piss y’all off
♡ hence, with a final mischievous snicker, he dashed off
♡ “i hate kids.” oikawa muttered, inspecting his homescreen to see if he really did look like a ‘dork’, “what is his problem?”
♡ “what if our kids turn out like that?” you joked 
♡ his eyes widened momentarily, turning to look at you with an uncharacteristically sheepish expression, “our w--”
♡ “mr kawa!” a cry could be heard from the kitchen so without hesitation, you both hopped to your feet and rushed over there as quick as you could 
♡ once you both reached the area the yell came from, you were fortunately not greeted by anything gruesome 
♡ instead, you both got to behold two children trying to reach the top shelf with the power on friendship; the taller boy was standing on a chair, while the toddler held it still 
♡ however, his grip on the jar of the Nutella must’ve loosened at some point as it now lay dejectedly on the ground, half spilled across the tiles and the other half drenching the toddler, not that they seemed to mind though 
♡ in fact, it looked like they were having the time of their — albeit, short — life
♡ the container was only plastic, hence you didn’t have to worry about shards when you darted over to the poor, chocolate-covered baby and scooped them up into your arms, “are you guys, okay?!”
♡ “yeah.” the boy chuckled, noticing that holding the toddler was transferring the chocolate onto you too
♡ “if you wanted nutella, you could’ve just asked.” oikawa sighed, helping the boy get down safely from the chair before putting the object back at it’s intended spot at the dinner table 
♡ “you could have gotten seriously hurt! i thought you would know better than to do something like this.” you scolded, becoming even more furious as the baby continued to playfully slap your face with their grimy hands, “please don’t do that again.”
♡ before they boy got the chance to do anything besides murmur a vague apology, oikawa interjected, “they won’t get the chance.”
♡ and he was right
♡ after cleaning everything up (including the child, which took forever), you didn’t let either of the rascals out of your sight until your duties as babysitters were complete 
♡ “i think we handled that pretty well.” oikawa mused, gathering his stuff along with you as you both got ready to leave
♡ “yeah, maybe we should do this again sometime.” you suggested, but it was followed by a few second was complete silence
♡ until you both burst out laughing 
♡ “yeah, never again.” you agreed
♡ “the kids can take care of themselves.” oikawa said with shrug, offering his hand to you, before you both strutted out of the disaster house
♡ ever since then, it was a common inside joke between you to, when in the vicinity of a kid causing mayhem or being a nuisance, whisper to each or exchange a look that says, ‘it’s a great day to not be babysitting.’  
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SATORI TENDŌ
♡ at first, you thought that asking tendou for help babysitting would be a bad idea bc he is just as hyperactive as the damn kids sometimes so he’d probably not be the best influence 
♡ and you knew this bc one time you happened to run into him while out in the park with the kids and you asked him to watch them for literally a minute so you could run to the bathroom but when you came back all you almost had a heart attack because tendou was teaching them fkn tricks on the monkey bars 
♡ however, you then realised that if the kids were busy committing arson with uncle tendou, then they wouldn’t be bothering you 
♡ so here you are, playing monopoly with your boyfriend, a seven year-old and a one year-old
♡ well, it was less like monopoly and more like debate class since none of you could agree on the rules
♡ “well, uncle ten,” the older sibling began, in a very matter-of-factly tone, “if i burn your property down, then i  don’t have to pay you for landing on it.”
♡ “but then you also go to jail.” you pointed out
♡ “not if the police don’t catch me.”
♡ you burst out laughing, meanwhile tendou kept his business face on, “good point, but watch this.” tendou spoke as he rolled the dice, though no matter what if he got a number between four and seven, he would end up landing on somebody’s property
♡ he got a four
♡ picking up his piece, he moved it across each square individually and once he was due to land on your property, he knocked his piece over
♡ “whoops, i slipped.” he chuckled, though his friendly aura immediately dropped as he looked you dead in the eye and said, “i’m suing.”
♡ “you can’t sue me because you tripped!” you yelled 
♡ “i guess i just fell for you.” he said, resulting in the kids both making gagging noises before he stuck out his hand, “100 monopoly dollars, please.”
♡ “like i said,” you tried your best to stay strong and not laugh at his shitting pickup line, “i’m not giving you any money, you fell!”
♡ “i guess we’ll have to take this matter to court then.” tendou said, tapping the shoulder of the one year-old who was currently chewing on a 500 bill which you quickly had to confiscate 
♡ “judge, do you think (y/n) owes me 100 monopoly dollars for poor health and safety conduct?”
♡ “yes.”
♡ “that is the only word they know how to say!” you cried, begrudgingly handing over the money 
♡ “thank you, angel.” tendou cooed, adding your singular bill to the pile he had already stored up; the winner of the game had already been decided 
♡ and although you and the seven year-old kid both cried later after getting your asses kicked in monopoly (the one year-old cried too but they were just hungry), you all went out to get food and actually had a pretty good time
♡ it became a routine for tendou to help you babysit whenever he got the chance and y’all would always play table top games
♡ also when tendou got accepted into culinary school, he’d teach/show the kids what dishes he has learned to prepare and let them help by stirring the pot, adding spices etc etc
♡ and even when he moved to Paris, on special occasions, a box of chocolates would suddenly appear at the kids’ door and all the little pieces would be shaped and moulded into some of their favourite characters or made out of their favourite flavours 
♡ and at one point the kids even insisted that you teach them how to make chocolates so they can send some back to uncle tendou <33
♡ they weren’t the best, but when tendou received the misshapen, slightly stale chocolates at his apartment, addressed from you and the children, he cried
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KIYOOMI SAKUSA
♡ his first response when you asked if he could help you babysit was ofc ‘ew no 🤢’
♡ needless to say it took a lot mansplain manipulate malewifing to convince him to come over 
♡ but once he did, obviously he was in his full protective gear; there was no way in hell he was going to catch whatever germs the little goblins have
♡ honestly he almost sprayed a chid in the face with hand sanitizer when they came running up to him with open arms, trying to give him a hug 
♡ which was unusual because the kids don’t tend to be overly friendly with new people, but you just brushed it off and figured that sakusa must’ve been an exception
♡ during his time babysitting, sakusa spend most of his energy trying to avoid the children at all costs that it basically became a game of tag, with you helping the child try to reach sakusa, and him hiding
♡ but honestly you couldn’t complain since the whole time the child was playing, they were safe with you rather than playing with fire 
♡ until later you were reminded of their odd fondness for sakusa when they insisted that sakusa carry them to their bedroom when it was their nap time
♡ and as you were shifting through the books, looking for a story to read, it hit you why they seemed to be so familiar with sakusa
♡ it’s because he looked exactly like the prince in one of their favourite story books; same hair, both tall and they even had similar moles to each other
♡ upon noticing this, you immediately showed sakusa and was quite amused
♡ in fact, he found it so cute that he gave both you and the toddler a lil’ kiss on the cheek, as a parting gift — mask off and everything
♡ he ended up reading the story and the kid fell into deep slumber by the time he reached the second page
♡ letting out a sigh of relief, sakusa slumped onto the ground, allowing his own eyes to flutter shut for a moment, “what a day.”
♡ you shuffled over to you could lay down beside him, “indeed it was, prince sakusa.”
♡ “shut up.” he teased, poking your rib slightly before absently intertwining his fingers with your own
♡ next thing you knew, you were both awakened by the sound of a grumpy toddler...
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