swan1974-blog

[swan1974-blog]

can you write a romantic story about swan and my oc ? uwu

What kind of story You may ask

#swan 1974 #talks #writing

[swan1974-blog]

Swan special needs

In 1984, when Swan was 44 years old, he drove his extremely pregnant wife Sonya to the hospital. She screamed at him the whole time, making threats and throwing profanity. "If you make me drop these babies on this car seat, I will make you not see the light of another day!" she snapped. "We're there, honey," a very nerve-racked Swan said, parking at the hospital. She was taken in, and he was asked to wait in the waiting room. Swan alerted everyone he knew on his cell phone that Sonya was in labor. He got many prayers and congratulations. He accidentally texted Sonya that she was in labor, and she texted back, "I know, dummy, I'm pretty darn aware." He daydreamed what his life would be like with his children. He knew Sonya was mostly a terrible person, and wondered if he would be forced to raise them himself, not that he would be surprised. The doctor came and said, "They are all doing well. Your son is big and strong. Your daughter is small and well. You have handsome/beautiful children. Your wife is fine, but she told me to stay away, not to touch her again. Anyway, I looked on your record, and it has been brought to my attention that you are special needs. You know you can't properly care for a child, much less two, according to the National Council on Disability? You are having your parental rights removed." Swan's jaw dropped. "No, what if my wife dies or something?" he cried. "Your children will be removed to a foster care home," the doctor said. "I'm sorry." "Can I at least see them, damn it?" Swan snapped irritably. "Sure," the doctor said, nodding. Swan saw the babies in the room, Sonya cuddling Logan against her breasts. "Who's my baby boy? Yes, you are! Mommy loves you," she cooed. Sam was in her crib, and she started to wail. Sonya ignored her. "Sonya! Are you going to do something with her?" Swan snapped. "No," Sonya said bluntly. "That's your child." Swan went to pick up the baby from the crib, but the doctor took the baby, saying, "Allow me." "That's my daughter!" Swan snapped, on the verge of tears. The doctor ignored him. Swan went out in the hallway, and he called Falcon. Emotionally breaking down in sobs, he said, "The doctor said I don't have parental rights since I'm disabled. Sonya obviously favors Logan more than Sam, and the doctor won't even let me save her from neglect!" "Hold on," Falcon said. "I'll be there in a few to give that lousy doctor a piece of my mind!" When Falcon came, she saw the helpless baby Sam in the doctor's arms. She went up to the doctor and said, "Excuse me, since when did you put it upon yourself to deny parental rights to my brother?" "Your brother?" the doctor asked. "Yes, hand me over my niece," Falcon snapped. The doctor handed her Sam, and the baby finally stopped crying as Falcon gently rocked her in her arms. "Look, moron, my brother is just as capable as you are," she said in a calmer tone, yet still condescendingly. "Prove it," the doctor said, crossing his arms. "I know what you're thinking, what does this chick know? I know a lot. I've known my brother my whole life, you've only known him for a day," she said. The doctor nodded. "I can't deny that," he said. "He is a doctor as well. Did you not catch that? Not a maternity doctor, think more like a neurology or cardiology surgeon. Yes, he has delivered babies before, but he has also saved lives of stroke and heart attack victims. As long as he has his glasses and hearing aids, he's good to go," Falcon said. "But he has attended to adults more so than children, am I right?" the doctor asked. "That is irrelevant. When you think of children as small adults, there's not much difference. An infant receiving CPR is just as vulnerable to death as an adult," Falcon said. "Who told you that?" the doctor asked. "He did," Falcon replied. "He's right," the doctor marveled. "Yeah, he is right 99% of the time," Falcon said. "He wouldn't be a good doctor if he wasn't. Now we have confirmed he is able to save lives, what makes you think he can't raise a child?" "He is special needs," the doctor said. "Again, irrelevant. I will call a lawyer if you don't stop saying that," Falcon threatened. "He can walk, talk, feed, clothe himself without any assistance. If he couldn't do that, you might as well take his rights as father away. But since he can, you have no rights, and I have a lawyer on speed dial." The doctor gulped. "Nope, I'm not being sued for malpractice," he said. "Then give my brother parental rights," Falcon said. "Okay, okay, I will, geez," the doctor said. Falcon handed Sam to Swan. Swan cooed at the baby. "Hey, my little princess," he said. "Daddy will take good care of you." He bottled fed her and changed her diaper. The doctor looked on, marveled. "I never seen this thing before, a disabled parent completely able to care for a child. From now on, as long as the disabled parent is capable of caring for themselves, they can keep their parental rights," he said. Falcon smiled.

#special needs #paul williams #phantom of the paradise #deafness #disabilties #disabled #parenting #discrimination

[swan1974-blog]

Swan special needs

Swan Got A Flashback. Swan's Childhood Self Was Round Cheeks, Almond Shaped Eyes, Round Nose Tip, Small, Thin Lips, Slightly Pointy Chin,Blond, Wavy Hair, Straight Bangs That Cover The Forehead, Hair Hanging To Shoulders Slightly Curly At Ends. He Wore A Satin Purple Girls Shirt With Hot Pink Jeans "Hey, Girl, Wanna Play Dollies With Us?" Teased A Little Boy. "That's A Boy," Another Boy Replied. They Both Laughed. "Hey, Four Eyes," Boy One Hollered. He Covered His Mouth And Yelled Muffled Inaudible Words. The Second Boy Cracked Up. "What?" Swan Asked, A Look Of Confusion About Him. "Oh, You Retard," The Boys Said. "Leave Me Alone!" Swan Cried As The Boys Shoved Him Backwards Until He Fell On The Ground. They Kicked Him As He Struggled To Get Up. The Boys Started Laughing So Much They Had To Stop, And Swan Made His Getaway. He Ran Towards The Tree. Seven Year Old Swan Was Sitting In The Same Tree Like He Did Everyday During Recess. He Was Sobbing His Eyes Out After His Classmates All Shunned Him, Calling Him A Sissy And Asked If He Was A Girl, Asked What Girl Things He Did, And Made Fun Of Him For It. He Was Crying Softly In The Tree Alone. Suddenly, He Heard Someone Whisper, "Swan." Feeling Like He Was Hearing Things, He Ignored It. "Swan," The Whisper Got A Little Louder, But Still Gentle. Who Would Be Calling Him By His Real Name On The Playground And Not Some Crude Nicknames? "Swan," The Gentle Whisper Said Again. This Time It Was No Shout Of Doubt Someone Actually Called Him By His Real Name. He Felt Someone's Breath Hit His Ear. He Looked Up Slowly. It Was His Sister Falcon. "I Came To See You. I Have Been Really Worried About You Sitting In This Tree All Alone," She Said. "I'm Okay," Swan Said, Looking Down. She Lifted Up His Chin With One Hand, Wiped The Tears With The Other, And Said, "I Know You're Not Okay." "Never Mind That," Swan Said, Slapping Her Hands Away. "Who Are They?" Falcon Asked. "Who?" He Asked, Then It Dawned On Him. "I Don't Know Their Names. We're Not Friends." "Oh, Though Lame Excuses Of Friends Need To Learn A Lesson Or Two, I Will Show Them," Falcon Said. "They Are Losers, Swan, Don't Listen To Them. If They Actually Got The Time To Know You, They Would Kick Themselves For Treating You Poorly." Swan Smiled Weakly. "If Someone Mistreats You, Call Me, And I'll Go All Momma Bear On Them, Grr," Falcon Said. "I Love You." "I Love You," Swan Said. They Hugged, And They Got Down From The Tree. Swan Pointed To All Those Who Were Bullying Him, And She Gave Them A Piece Of Her Mind. Some Of Them Ran From Her Screaming And Crying. Swan Felt Falcon Restored His Faith In Humanity, And He Thanked Her.

#swan #phantom of the paradise #paul williams #falcon #special needs #deafness #deaftalent #bullying #special bullying

[swan1974-blog]

Blazing Saddles (1974) dir. Mel Brooks

#awsome #movies #they don't have this type of humor anymore

[swan1974-blog]

Swan and falcon

Falcon and Willy were alone, the candy maker looked at Falcon. Willy says,I assume you didn't expect me here. Now then, it’s more than obvious that you are angry about me and perhaps you are angry that I have decided to come back here in the wake of your emotional outbursts. Falcon said nothing, instead she just stared at the man in the same manner that she had done that night they broke up . Willy sat down on the couch and looked at Falcon. He says,I'm not going to play dumb and pretend I don't know why you're angry. You have decided to hate me haven’t you? I personally don't blame you. Instead of speaking,Falcon turned away and said nothing. The chocolatier glanced over towards Swan. Willy says,I see you have spent a lot of time with Swan. I can imagine that helping swan with his special needs is probably hard. Wouldn't you admit? Falcon turned around, her gaze coming to rest on the man seated by her. Willy asked openly,Will you speak to me? Falcon says,Y-yeah... Falcon's resolve to not speak to Willy seemed to be faltering and she turned and faced him. The light from inside the room now cast shadows across his face and for a split second the man reminded her of an angel instead of just a disheveled candy maker. Willy said, his next words emerging in an exhalation of breath, You may remember clearly exactly all I said that night. You may recite them in your nightmares. I just am an utter fool! Falcon said sullenly,I know you are, and you just realized that? Willy says sternly,You could have acted out of jealousy, but you seem to not have any problems with that, not wanting me to suffer your wrath. You heavily avoided me. Somehow, I think you did this because you have so much anger and sadness built up inside of you that you had no idea what to do with it. You are bottling up all your deep emotions and dark secrets inside. All you know is that if you don’t find an outlet for it, you will explode. Maybe that’s why you came across me today. Falcon looked at the chocolatier, but no words emerged. Instead, Willy continued to speak, his words simple. Willy says,Well, I guess I deserve for making you feel bad. Well, falcon, you want to get that anger out, here I am. You have my permission, no joke. You can push me around, hit me, scream or yell all you want. I will not fight back, I will not hit you. I know I may look a little intimidating. The cane is at the factory so I have no means of protecting myself. I don't even have a spare to bring with me. The only thing is I will not let you do is shed blood, break my bones, and kill me. So, let’s get this behind us, shall we? Let's settle this once and for all. Falcon whispered with anger,You don't even know what you've said. I don't understand, why would you have said those things to me on that night? Without saying so much as another word, Willy stood up and came down off the couch, his body now standing out in the open. Willy says,Come on, don't be shy. It’s very simple, you want a punching bag, you’ve got one. You should let your anger out somehow, one way or another. You has been put through enough because of your hostility toward me, and I am deserving of your wrath. The chocolatier remained standing unmoving, but watched as Falcon started to walk over to where he stood. Falcon's hands clenched into fists and it looked as though she was going to try and throw several hard gut retching punches. When it suddenly happened, Willy was taken aback as the breath was forced from him. He could feel that falcon's strong masculine strength was more intense than he had anticipated. He could do nothing except prepare himself for the second, third, or even a fourth blow from the angry Falcon. As he felt the painful hits against his chest, he backed away only to fall over swan. Falcon came even closer to him, and when he saw the shadow of her over him, Willy closed his eyes wondering all the while if his actions had helped matters or succeeded in making them worse. Falcon says with anger,Didn't see that coming, did you? Willy says,No, no I did not. Falcon says while her mouth became a thin line,the anger bursting forth,You better be sorry! Willy says,I am, I am! Falcon says,You wanna know why I didn't talk to you? Willy says,W-why? Falcon says,Stop playing dumb, I think you already know. Swan came over to them. Swan says to falcon,Aren't you getting a little out of hand? Falcon screamed at Willy,Did you hear that, Willy? Weren't you getting a little out of hand that night we broke up? Swan says,I was talking to you, Falcon. He sees falcon crying and screaming at Willy. Swan says to Willy with a frown,Are you going to let her throw you around like this? Willy says,I'm trying to understand her pain. Swan was getting frustrated at willy's ignorance of falcon, All she ever wanted to do was love you, and you shot her in the heart with a bullet, metaphorically? Willy says,I never said I was sorry or showed any sign of remorse. Swan screamed at Willy,Maybe that is the problem! Willy says,I had no idea... Swan says,Come on, you need some help reconciling with her, and you are too chicken to ask for it? Swan got three chairs. He put the chairs in one row on foot between each other. He was in the middle, Willy on the left, and Falcon on the right. Falcon had her arms crossed, pouting and slouching in the chair. Willy sat straight and tall, twiddling his thumbs and stared at his tapping feet on the floor. Swan was unusually calm. "Let's not get into any sort of physical fights. Let's settle this in a civil manner." Swan said. "Willy, tell me your side of the story." Falcon started to screamed, but Swan immediately shushed her by waving his hand in her face. "I was really busy at my desk, working on papers. She came in. I was in a really grumpy mood. She proposed to me, no surprise there, I knew she would eventually. She opened the ring, and I just smacked the box into her face, shattering the ring. I told her that I didn't really love her. That she wasn't replacing Erin. I vowed never to marry again because losing Erin hurt so bad." Swan nodded, thanking Willy, and turned to Falcon. "Is all he said true?" he asked. Falcon nodded. Swan asked Willy, "When Falcon was helping you raise Quinn, did you love her then?" Willy said, "I loved her long before I met Erin. I changed into a different man after Erin died. I turned irritable, impatient, and a bit rude, not with my children, but Falcon and others. Falcon deserves the gold medal for being with me the longest after Erin died." "Oh, you tell me I deserve something other than being Quinn's replacement mommy?" Falcon fumed. "Is that what this was all about? You were using me?" "Tone it down," Swan warned. "I'm deeply sorry, and my actions haunt me to this day. If there is anything I can do for you," Willy said. "I can never repay you no matter how hard I tried. Falcon began to cry. "I didn't want to talk to you. I knew you weren't kidding when you said you weren't the same man you were. You and Swan are quite alike, turning bad after a serious loss then turning good again when someone comes along to set you straight. I forgive you. I don't see a reason in staying angry with you," she said. Willy got up from his chair, and walked to Falcon, kneeling in front of her and said in a gentle voice, "I'm not mad at you, I am mad at myself for how I treated you." He gave her a hug that squeezed excess tears from her eyes. She smiled weakly, maintaining eye contact with him. "I stared at that shattered ring for who knows how long that night. I didn't think it would shatter like that, but I also didn't think my heart would shatter the day Quinn was born, the same day Erin died. I felt just as awful that night as I felt when Erin died. I fought for so long for those feelings not to resurface, but they came back to haunt me," he said. "Apology accepted," Falcon said. Willy smiled. "I love you," he said. "I love you, too," Falcon replied.

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise

[swan1974-blog]

#cyclia

[swan1974-blog]

CYCLIA is pure theater in a revolutionary new form: A perfectly controlled, unified environment of movement, images and sound. CYCLIA is an experience both powerful and exquisite, poetically simple and brilliantly abstract. It is cyclonic tornadoes of color, exploding images and torrents of flashing impressions. CYCLIA is a sensational glimpse into the inner contents of our times – a vital, living, expanding experience that consumes its audience. It is total involvement, total communication. CYCLIA is the entertainment experience of the future – theater of the year 2017

#cyclia #60's #pychedelic #design #nightclub

[swan1974-blog]

Poem

A Little Bird Somewhere way up in the sky Lost high up in the air Is a little bird that cannot fly The way the others dare. The little bird is all alone When the others begin to play. The little bird sits with thoughts unknown Of truths it will not say. It doesn't chirp the same old song That the others learned to sing Instead its lyrics all are wrong... It's such a tragic thing. No one wants a little bird Who can't seem to get along. No one has the kindest word For the one who is so wrong. And yet the bird, it longs to fly The way the others do And yet the bird, it cannot try To see the hidden cues. In the middle of the dark of night When the other birds perch asleep, The little bird cries out its plight With a song of pain so deep That every melodious chirp rings With such horrid, tearful sound... And every single lyric brings Saddened tears upon the ground. Somewhere out there is a little bird That sits upon a perch alone. And it's without a single spoken word That the pain remains unknown.

#poetry #disabled

[swan1974-blog]

Swan is deaf and blind

Swan Says,Yes. I Was Always Dealing With Deafness And Blindness And Having To Lip Read Ever Since I Was Born. How I Dealt With It Was I Got Glasses And Hearing Aids. I Often Rely On Other Sensory Clues To Figure Out With Whom Im Are Interacting. Look At My Hearing Aids. Swan Pulls His Hair Back To Let Falcon See His 2 Hearing Aids Molds On Both Ears Which Were Red And Black Swirls With The Battery Door Is Red And Tubing Is Black. Falcon Says,I Like Them. I Remember And Seen How You Wanted To Hide Them So People Won't Question You. Do You Still Remember To Take Them Off When You Went To Bed And Put Them On Every Day. I Don't Really Want To Remind You Because I Don't Want To Seem Pushy Or Bossy. Swan Says,It's Okay, You're Not Pushy Or Bossy. I Was Always Hiding My Hearing Aids In Both Ears In My Long Hair To Look Normal. Lip Reading Can Only Help Me Understand So Much What Someone Is Saying. How Would You Help Me With My Difficulties With Lip Reading, If You Can? Not Minding That I Ask For You To Repeat What You Said If I Always Don't Get It. Is That Okay? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,You May Already Know I Am Extremely Introverted. I Don't Really Understand The Situation When I Get Out Of Public And Being More Vulnerable Position Using My Disabitity Because It Is Harder For Me To Understand What Is Going On Around Me. I Always Hating The Loud Sounds And Noises And The Like Because Too Much Noise Leads To Confusion. I Hate Being Discriminated Of My Disabitity Because It Is Not Right. I Am Human, Too. Me Taken Advantage Of Because Of My Deaf And Blind Disability By My Non Disabled Partners Like Soyna For Example. She Thought I Was Too Dumb To Make My Own Intellectual Decisions. I'm Defidently Be More Vulnerable, Possibly Not Sure Where The Next Attack Is Coming From Sonya When She Abused Me And Sam. Oh Gosh, That Woman Was Unpredictable! Sam Even Used Sign And Let Me Lip Read Her To Help Me Describe What's Happening To Me And Her, And Most Importantly Why. Falcon Says,How Would You Support People Who Are Also Deaf Blind? Swan Says,Good Question. I Would Pressure The Nick Network To Have A Deaf And Blind Character In Icarly Because It Is Hard To Find A Character Like That. I'm A Deaf And Blind Activist By The Way. What Do You Think? Falcon Says,Deaf Blind Individuals Can Watch And Relate To The Character. Swan Says,That's Right. I Didn't Have My Hearing Aids On In The Morning When I Sleep, Because I Can't Sleep With Them On. They Make A High Pitched Squealing Sound When I Lay My Head On The Pillow. How Would You Wake Me Up If I Couldn't Hear You. What Would You Do? Falcon Says,Shake You Awake? Swan Says,Yes, Gently, Of Course. Falcon Says,How About Throwing A Bucket Of Cold Water On You? Swan Says,Brrrr, Don't Be Surprised If I Dump A Bucket Of Cold Water On You Later! Falcon Says,Okay, Onto A More Serious Note. How Would You Let Me Know To Speak Louder If The Cyclia Kaleidoscope Room Is Too Loud For You To Hear Me? Can You Turn The Music Off? You Having A Hard Time Listening To Me While Hearing Loud Music. I Know You Try To Listen To Understand. Trying Hard To Read My Lips. Reading Lips Is 90% Affective. Swan Explained,I Can Read Lips Really Well, Actually, And You Can Talk Loudly In My Ear. Falcon Says,Okay, Gotcha! Swan Says While Hearing His Right Hearing Aid Died Off Not Able To Hear Falcon, Thanks A Lot, My Hearing Aid Battery Is Making A Strange Noise. Knowing That She Heard Swan's Hearing Feedback Died Off, Falcon Signs Him What Is It Swan Can You Hear Me? Swan Was Offended And Politely Explained,My Hearing Aid Battery Died. I'm Verbal And Never Learned To Sign Because I Never Felt The Need For It. I Can Read Your Lips, Not Sign Language. I Should Ask You To Be Louder And Clear If I Would Hear You While Lip Reading. Will You Do That, Please? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,Thank You. Falcon Goes In Her Purse To Give Swan His Package Of Hearing Aid Batteries. Swan Says While Putting The Battery In His Hearing Aid,Thanks For Keeping Spare Batteries For Me. He Puts It Back On His Ear. Falcon Says,Can You Hear Me Now? Swan Says,Yes. I Still Need You To Get Me And Make Large Print Copies Of Screenplays I Get From The Mail About Icarly. It Really Helps Me To Read And Not Strain My Eyes. A Closed Captioned Phone Because I Can See The Words That Are Being Said In The Screen, In Case I Don't Understand What's Being Said, Causing Less Frustration For Me, And Less Frustration To The Person I'm Talking To. To Suit My Disability Needs What Do You Think? Falcon Said,Sounds Good To Me Whatever Helps. What About Closed Captioning On Icarly And Zoey 101? Just For You Because The Same Reason You Use Close Captioned Phones. I Always Do That For You If You Stop Pestering Me About Where They Are At! Don't You Know You Pester Me? Swan Says,No Idea. Falcon Says,Just Kidding. You Can't Even Hear Everything I Say Coming Out Of My Mouth. It Is Really Important For You To Maintain Eye Contact. It Sometimes Really Frustrates Me If You Say I Can Hear You When You're Not Hearing Me Correctly. Would You Do That? Swan Groaned And Says,I Don't Have To Look At You To Hear You. Falcon Says,Yes You Do! Don't Get Stubborn With Me! Swan, I Have Been Too Kind To You. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,It's Like You Don't Want To Listen To Me. Just Give Me The Hearing Aid Clip On Microphone So You Can Hear Me Better, Or Else I Won't Talk To You. Lip Reading Doesn't Always Help You Even You Miss What I'm Saying. You Hear Me? Swan Protested,No. Falcon Says,Swan, Please. I'm Not Asking You To Stand On Your Head And Spin Around Singing The Abc's. I Even Notice You Always Stare Off In Space When I Try To Talk To You, You're Not Fooling Me. It Means You Can't Really Hear Me Because You Won't Look In My Direction. Swan Says,I Can Hear You. Falcon Says,I Can't Tell! Swan Says,Well, Trust Me I Can. Falcon Says,You Need To Respond Correctly. Swan Sighed And Gives Her The Clip On Microphone From His Pocket, Falcon Puts It In Her Pocket And Clips It On Her Shirt Near Her Mouth. Falcon Says,Thank You, Swan. Do You Hear Me Now? Tell Me. Swan Lied,No. Falcon Was Frustrated And Says,You Can't Even Respond No If You Couldn't Hear Me. Do You Have Your Mic Setting On Your Hearing Aids On? Do You? Do You? Do You? Swan Grumbled And Says,Stop Pestering Me. Falcon Says,I Wouldn't Pester Me If You'd Stop Being Stubborn. If You Don't Understand Or Get Something I Say, Let Me Know. Don't Be Afraid To Say Can You Repeat It Or Make It Simple So I Can Understand You Well. Do You Comprehend? Swan Says,Yes? Falcon Says,Thank You. Swan Says,I Don't Like This Thing. Falcon Says,Why? Swan Puts On The Mic Setting On His Hearing Aids And Hears Falcon Better. Falcon Says,Why? Swan Says,It Looks Funny. Falcon Says,I Had A Friend Who Used One In School, People Just Assumed She Was Allowed To Listen To Her Ipod In School. She Had To Explain It Wasn't An Ipod. Swan Says,Oh, Cool, Good To Know. I Assume People Think That I'm Mentally Handicapped Or Retarded Because I Can't Hear Well. Falcon Says,That Is Nonsense. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,Then Stop Thinking That! Falcon Says,I'm Just Going To Be Very Honest And Upfront, Not Sugar Coat A Single Thing. I Hate To Deal With You Don't Want To Do Anything But Using Your Disabitity As A Excuse To Not Do Anything Via Thinking You Want Or Receive Special Treatment For Being An Special Needs Disability. Why Do I Say That When Someone Tells You To Do Something You Say You Can't. Swan Says,I Can Do Stuff. Falcon Says,I Know You Can. Sam Or Me Are Not Your Caretaker Making Us More Frustrated That You Is Still Depending On Us To Do Everything For You, I Know You Are Capable Of Doing Things For Yourself. So Why Don't You? We Are Really Frustrated And Angry At You Because You Are Not Completely Helpless. Swan Says,I Like Being Taken Care Of. Falcon Says,Oh, I Can Tell. We Are Like George And Lenny From Mice And Men Because Lenny Does Not Know His Own Strength, Defenseless And Totally Dependent On George. You Are Lenny And I Am George. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,I Have A Question. Did Sam Always Do/Replicate I Did To Help You,Care Of Your Special Needs? I Know Sam Loved You, And So Do I. But You Are Worth A Little Extra Effort For Her And Me Hopefully It Won't Be With Me Around. She Was Young, You Are An Old Man In A Young Man's Body. She Told Me It Was Always Very Emotionally And Physically Exhausting For Her When She Grew Up Because It Was Very Hard On Her. Wouldn't You Do Anything For Her In Return? Swan Explained,What Kind Of Question Is That? Yes. Of Course. It Was A Burden On Her, And She Was So Strong. I Would've Gave Up At He Age. Me Being Special Needs Because I Could Barely Take Care Of Myself At Sam's Age. I Felt Bad For Sam, Really. She Felt Like She Didn't Good Enough Because She Thought She Was Trying Too Hard To Be Like You Because You Were Her Female Role Model. Falcon Says,I See. So When She Was Growing Up, You Wanted Her To Be Me, Knowing I Would Be A Better Influence On Her Than Sonya. So You Depended On Her All Her Life Making It Very Hard And Difficult On Her Because She Was Young And Had Her Own Difficulties. The Stress And Worrying Took A Toll On Her Because She Felt She Could Never Do Good Enough. She Always Asked For My Help Through Phone Contact And Private Face To Face Meetings Between Me And Her All Her Life While Keeping In Touch Because She Would Ask Me For Advice. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,You Know? She Has Been Jealous That I Came Back In Your Life And Spending Time Together Because She Wishes She Was With Her. Swan Says,I Want Her To Be Here Too. She Always Thought She Was You Because She Acted A Lot Like You. She Said She Was A Spitting Image Of You. She Always Tried To Do Everything For Me Like You Did. Sonya Didn't Do Much For Me. It Didn't Feel The Same With Her But I Deeply Wished You Were There To Help Me And Could've Lived With Me When I Got Married With Soyna Because You Could've Protected Me From Her Awful Blows. Soyna Hated You When She First Met You Because You Are My Sister. She Tried To Force Me To Not Seeing You And It Hurt When I Felt I Needed You Badly Because I Didn't Have Your Support. She Would Always Hit Me When I Always Mentioned You Every Day, For No Reason, Actually. I Even Tried To Escape From Her To Just See You, But She Caught Me. She Wouldn't Let Me Because She Said You Didn't Want To See Me, And I Told Her That Was Bull Hockey, And Make Contact With You Because I Love You And Want You And Need You. I Felt So Lost And Afraid Without You When I Had Sam, Missing My Body Guard You. I'm Really Glad You Always Kept In Touch With Sam And Letting Her How To Replicate What You Did For Me When You Were Not There In Me And Sam's Abuse Because She Turned Out To Be Very Strong Because Of You. My Wife Was Very Mantipuative, She Would Make Stuff Up Like You Didn't Care About Me. It Did Really Hurt Me When She Said That About You,I Knew It Wasn't True. And I Wanted To Be With You And Made You Come To Live With Me Because I Wanted To Divorce Sonya So Bad. My Wife Banned Me From Seeing You All My Married Life Because She Was So Selfish. It Did Really Hurt Me That I Was Forbidden To Not See You. She Was Evil. Falcon Says,I Agree. Swan Says,Sonya's Gone Now, No More Tormenting Me, Yay! Swan Looks At Falcon Silently. Catching Her Eyes Staring Into His, His Voice Squeaked, "Don't Let Me Go!" His Face Was Turning Red As The Tears Poured Down His Face. Hyperventilating, He Said In A Voice Of A Scared Child Over And Over, "I Love You." "I Love You Too," Falcon Said. "I Love You, I Love You, I Love You, I Love You!" Swan Cried. "I Won't Let You Go, Babe," Falcon Said Sweetly. Swan Says,I React Overemotionally Because I Was Overwhelmed With Love For You. As You Saw Me Break Down, I Seemed So Emotionally Pained And Traumatized Right At That Moment, I Will Actually Do This Every Time If We Get Intimate, Just So You Know. Desperation For You To Hold Me Tightly In Your Arms, And Not To Let Me Go. And Begging You To Not Let Go Like A Child's Voice. Begging For You Like A Scared Lost Child Would Looking For His Mother In The Sea Of Strangers. Always Being Vulnerable And Overwhelmed Around You, My Vulnerability Has To Be From The Heart. I'm Not Being Fake At All. It Has To Be Raw And Real When I See You Feeling Love And Connection Deepened Even Further. I Hope You Understand Being Emotionally Vulnerable. I Cry Easily. I See Myself As A Weak Man Who's Showing How Weak And Overly Sensitive He Is I Can Express A Much Higher Degree Of Sadness And Express Sadness More Often. It Means That I Trust You In A Deep Way To Be That Extremely Vulnerable In Front Of You I'm Super Emotional All The Time. Needless To Say, I Do Have A Strong Desire For Greater Need For Belonging And Connection. Needing More Connection, More Deeply And Consistently From You. I Love You Too. Falcon Says,You Don't Have To Be Scared To Cry In Front Of Me. I Won't Judge You. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,Openly Crying Isn't A Weakness, It's A Strength. Swan Says,Thanks. Falcon Says,Bottling Up Emotions Isn't Healthy At All, Even For Men. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,I Won't Let You Go. Swan Says,Thank You For Always Being Here For Me. Falcon Says,No Problem, My Pleasure.

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise #deafness #deaf #blindness #brother and sister #special needs #disabilties #disabled

[swan1974-blog]

Deaf and blind love

Swan sat down and sighed. Swan typed up what was on the computer, She – She awoke to blackness, a blackness that never ceased. A mirror hung on a wall in her room but she might not have noticed it least of all care that it is there. She could only imagine what her reflection might be. She had no clue that her azure eyes held miles of ocean. She could barely remember that her auburn hair curled gently as it trailed down her back. Some days she’d get dressed only to find herself being told that her socks didn’t match, that the shirt she was wearing was inside out and that her ponytail was crooked.

He – He awoke to silence, eternal and endless silence. His once beloved music collection lay in the corner forgotten. Dust seeped onto the records of Jim Morrison, onto the cassettes of Cream and Led Zeppelin, and onto the now brittle CD cases of Jefferson Airplane. His guitar stood in the corner also, preserved like an artifact from a museum. Occasionally he would sit, zoning out into some alternate world and never realize that someone was trying to get his attention.

She – Her parents tried to lift the darkness and occasionally she would get a reprieve. But it was artificial. The blackness never took a vacation; she could only pretend – pretend and dream. But she had to come to realize that this was the way it was. And she did. She managed to ignore the pity aimed in her direction. She reached out to those who treated her like everyone else and somehow she made friends. But no one really understood. They could feel compassion but not know, not know just how it felt.

He – He almost convinced himself to ignore the silence. To pretend that he could hear the lyrics of the music on the radio and that he could converse in a normal conversation without worrying that his voice would fail him. But it couldn’t last. Nothing so artificial could. So he convinced himself of the truth and somehow managed to continue without or with little self-pitying despair. No one understood the silence, the lack of laughter and noise, the absence of banter and arguments. No one understood what it was like to be a man of few words and not by choice but due to unfortunate circumstances.

She – Was it through her parents friends that she met him? She couldn’t really remember as she had to rely only on her spoken memory and had no faces to match to names. But she remembered him. He had this voice, a voice which sounded somewhat choppy – kind of like a person who had one too many daiquiris. At first his voice seemed rough and hard to understand at times. But then it became habitual, something familiar and comforting. She might not be able to tell anyone his hair color or the clothes he wore but she could tell them about his voice. She could tell people about his ideas, about how he carried a conversation, about his personality.

He – She was nothing he ever expected. Truthfully, he hadn’t expected anything. He rarely expected anything anymore for he always seemed to end up disappointed. But she was something which he couldn’t define, something special, something out of the norm. She was graceful even though half the time she narrowly stops herself from walking into walls. She was elegant even though her clothes never matched and her hair seemed to have a life of its own. And she was beautiful. He had thought it was a pity that someone so beautiful couldn’t even see it to enjoy it. But that was before he realized that that was part of the beauty. She didn’t have the vanity that usually followed such beauty. She didn’t realize how pretty she was – and she didn’t even seem to care.

She – It was difficult to hold a conversation at first – if you could call it that even. There she was, typing out her words. And there he was, having to wait patiently for her response every other sentence. It was awkward, having such an obvious disadvantage just in the simple action of ‘talking’ to each other. So she learned to talk with her hands. It wasn’t easy, but yet neither was almost everything else. She imprinted each letter in her memory so that it soon became second nature. She wanted them to have a normal conversation, at least as normal of a conversation as people like them could have.

He – “I missed you.” Those were her first words to him. The first words that weren’t typed, that weren’t scrawled messily on a scrap of paper. He had stared at her. Of course, she didn’t know that but even so he felt himself blush in embarrassment. He asked her when she learned sign language. She smiled, happily telling him that now they could have a normal conversation. He winced. “I’m sorry I’m a burden,” he began to apologize and suddenly her smile was wiped off her face. “You’re not a burden,” she signed. “Neither of us are.” Somehow, he knew those words weren’t limited to just this discussion but to everything in general. And somehow he knew that those words weren’t to reassure him as they were to reassure herself. “I know what you mean,” he told her, those words meaning more that anyone else could ever know.

She – She was understood. Being understood is an imaginable feeling. To just have someone know what you’re talking about, to just feel that you aren’t insane or imagining things. Just to know that you really aren’t alone. It’s like you’re finally able to relax and be able to breathe again.

He – One day he asked her about music. She froze, almost uncertain on how to respond. But he coaxed the answer out of her and she showed him her music collection. It was mostly pop and other girly stuff. But even so it made him smile; it was familiar and sadly it was something he could never have. She picked up the guitar that stood in the corner of his room and held it in her lap. He told her about how he used to play. “I never learned to play an instrument. Kind of too late now,” She told him almost regretfully. It was then that he found himself showing her the strings, the order of which they were played for a certain cord. And she played. He could tell from the way she played that it would have sounded like a mess of sounds. But he didn’t care. To him, it sounded beautiful.

She – She told him about the books she used to read, all of which were now reduced to simple recordings or to complicated dots on a page. She used to read all the time, go through books as quickly as if she were inhaling them. And now reading (if it could even be called that) took an excessive amount of time, no longer a simple pastime. They exchanged favorite authors, favorite novels, poems, and short stories. She also shared her dream – she wanted to write. Write what? Something… anything.

He –He had a surprise for her. It was a book, a book of poems by one of her favorite authors to be exact. When he saw her he opened the book and read out one of the poems. She listened intently, and then slowly her lips curved into a smile. “Emily Dickinson,” she told him. “Yes, it is.” She sighed and told him to read her another one.

She – She found the paint in her room and she found some paper and then she began to paint. She didn’t know what colours she was using, she didn’t know how anything would turn out – and it’s not like she’d ever know. “What are you painting?” He asked her. “It’s a sunset,” she replied even though she knew that whatever was on the paper in no shape or form would ever resemble a sunset. But it was the thought that counts, right?

He – It looked like a pile of colours. But somehow, somewhere, he could see the sun. It was a green blob surrounded by lines of orange, red, white, and black. Truthfully, it was more of a sunset than anything anyone else could ever come up with. He took the paintbrush from her and set it down on the table. Taking her hand, he led her outside. Over a nearby hill the sun was slowly descending. And he showed it to her. He told her about the yellow thing so bright it was almost white. He told her about the soft hue of red and orange surrounding it. He told her about the white spots of cloud. And suddenly she was no longer hearing a description but she was seeing it.

She – He was her eyes. She could see, in an obscure nontraditional sort of way. “I don’t know what I would do without you,” She told him, before pulling him into a hug. He didn’t say anything for a moment, then: “I don’t know what I would do without you either.” Swan looks at the computer and sees falcon,smiling. Falcon says,I really liked it. Swan was speaking,Thank you for reading over my shoulder Falcon signs I love you to swan, Swan signs back I love you.

#deaf #blindness #love #disabled #swan #paul williams

[swan1974-blog]

Swan dr phibes circumcision story

Swan gets a tape and watched the tape with falcon. The tape was 6 years old Swan and dr phibes,John go to a hospital, Swan has on a skin tone jockstrap cleverly hiding his intact penis,with a fake looking realistic Penis in the front, Dr phibes and swan go to a circumcision room, Dr phibes invented a circumcision restraint table but it has a hidden trapdoor for swan to escape easily. Swan is strapped in the restraints and says,let's get them hell Dr phibes smiled and gives a evil grin,hiding in darkness,his long black cloak covering him,giving him the appearance of a shadow. He sees the doctors coming in to try to cut swan, Swan chuckled and sees the fake blood coming out of the fake penis. Dr phibes sees swan acting out screaming in pain and pushes the button where the trapdoor cleverly hid swan in the table where the doctors turned around to get the tools. A Cloth Soaked In Chloroform Is Clapped Over The doctors Mouth By Dr phibes Black-Gloved Hand, Dr Phibes As Though Taking A Hammer From A Naughty Child Takes The Scalpel From the doctor's Trembling Hand,Disapprovingly Shaking His Head And Crushes It. Dropping What's Left Of The scalpel, Dr Phibes Lifts The doctor With One Hand And Carries Him To A Chair Facing The Pedestal Now Holding The Covered Object. Swan and Dr Phibes Tie Him To The Chair With Silk Cords, Dr Phibes Said In A Threating Scary Tone,You Remain To Slow Delivery Of Our Pain. You Deter Us. You Must Die for all the men who have suffered from circumcision. "Do you desire to circumcise?", "You want that fixed?" and other such questions (like the ones you've given), is a warning sign of your fucking ignorance. Ignorance breeds bigotry. The prejudice against an anatomically correct male genitalia needs to STOP! I get justice for every guy and to all those of you ignorant bastards that tried to convince ant poor mother into cutting her baby, fuck you all to hell!!! I hope I will live long enough to see the end of this monstrous practice, and the best would be to see it made totally illegal as FGM is now. One of my best friends killed himself because he was so disturbed by being circumcised because of you. I still cringe at the humiliation and shame you brought upon on me. I had a mixture of feelings come over me: anger, depression, resentment, hatred, among a number of other things. The doctor gulped and says,but it is a birth defect. Dr phibes says,says who Chicken Shit for brains! Shame on you doctors for catering to the shallow sexual insecurities of parents, and for remaining willfully ignorant about the sexual virtues of the intact penis. My wife and I are pro circumcision activists, And had kept our twin sons fully intact. I'm a real doctor than you are. I know everything about the intact functions etc But you are one shitty doctor. I Have an article about a baby who ruptured his stomach, from screaming during circumcision. You are one sick bastard. My feelings about you who circumcised me as a child are too violent to describe,that I'm going to put you in. You knew the rage that I have for you being my mutilator runs so deep that I would willingly "return the favor to you" in the way you did me you might change your mind. To hell where you belong. and i can not put into words how very pissed i am at you. After a long pause, Dr phibes Slowly Closes His Eyes, He Opens Them. These Eyes Are Truly Evil. Cold. Dark. Demonic. Then The Worst Happens,He was glaring daggers at the doctor. He had a evil glare,narrowing at the doctor. The doctor gulped with guilt. He Sees A Dark Black Shadowy Figure Hidden Away In The Fog,He Can See Only His Eyes. From Out The Wall Of Darkness,The doctor Could See The Silhouette Of Dr Phibes Walking Ever So Slowly And Menacingly Towards Him. Years Of Experience Gave The doctor The Guess That This Guy Was Savoring The Moment And Playing With Him Like A Cat Would To A Mouse. He Looked Up To See The Grimacing Face Of The Phantom-Like Figure Dr phibes Staring Into His Eyes Very Uncomfortable. His Face Was Like A Stormy Sea,Violent And Cold. The doctor Lowered His Head In Shame,Trying To Break The Looming Figure's Gaze That Drilled Through Him. Dr phibes Suddenly Grabbed The doctors Chin And Pulled It Upward To his Face,Almost Ready To Break Him Into Two. He Continued His Eerie Stare. Dr Phibes Pops Up In Front Of Him and Smiling Madly,Malicious. He Just Leered At Him Intently,The Fear Consuming The doctor As Tears Fan Down His Face Once More In Terror, His Silence Was Intense Making His Presence Even More Uncomfortable Than It Was Before. Dr phibes evilly chuckled and gets a device, He gets a round vacuum thing from his doctor bag and attached to the doctors groin, It has 100 very sharp knifes in it ready to hurt the doctor, Dr phibes turns it on and sees the doctor screaming in pain, Seeing the never ending blood coming out of the device,into a large pool of blood. It also Rips The Testes Out Of The Body. It Is Filled With Dark Blood all over the floor. Dr phibes and swan are pleased to see the doctor in pain, The doctor's Face Was Turning Blue - Not Bright Blue Like His Eyes, But Greyish-Blue, The Colour Of Death, And Dr phibes Could See The Blood Vessels Beginning To Rupture In The White Of His Eyes, Little Streaks Of Red Spreading Out Beneath And Around The Lids. The doctor falls into the floor and dies. Swan and dr phibes go home, Dr Phibes Is Engaged In A Ritual Much Where He Blow-Torched Busts Of His Victims One By One. However Now He Has Set Up Seven Figures Of Wax Representing His Seven Victims. They Are Rather Like Voodoo Dolls Each Labeled With A Name And Hanging By Nooses Of Thread Over Miniature Tanks Filled With Liquid. With A Grave Ceremoniousness,Dr Phibes Picks Up A Pair Of Gold Shears Encrusted With Jewels And Uses These To Cut The Thread Suspending The First Of The Figures. The Figure Falls Into The Liquid Which Hisses And Bubbles (Obviously Some Kind Of Acid). After Several Seconds,A Tiny Skeleton Floats To Surface, Grinning Its Miniature Death-Grimace. Dr phibes smashes the tank in anger. The tape ends as swan sees falcon. Falcon feel hatred towards the doctor.

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise #dr phibes #vincent price

[swan1974-blog]

Swan and falcon

Several Framed Photographs Hung Sturdily On The Wall, Some Of Them Dating Back To The 1970'S. Falcon Had Time To Look Through Them As She Walked, Yet She Noticed An Young Paul Williams Recurrently Appear In The Older Color Pictures. She Thought It Was Swan But It Says In The Frames Paul Williams Etc 1970S. She Caught A Glimpse Of The Photos On The Walls Again, Still Perplexed About Paul, Whom She Now Noticed Was Fair-Haired And Wearing Dark Glasses On His Slightly Pudgy Face. Opening The Drawer Below The Desk,Swan Sorted Through Them And Thought About Which One He Was Going To Pick. Finding A Good One, He Grinned As He Pulled It Out. As He Flipped It Over On The Desk, Falcon Caught Sight Of The Image On The Cover. It Was Paul Williams She'd Seen In Those Old Photographs. Falcon Took The Opportunity To Ask, Pointing To The Album,That Is Paul, Right? Swan Pretended To Sound Surprised As He Slipped The Record Out, Placing It On The Platter And Says,Oh, That Old Guy? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,Nah. That's Me On The Cover,You Really Think That Was Paul? I Know We Are Twins. He Was Really Shy To Take Pictures So He Had Me To Do It For Him. Do You Believe Me? Falcon Says,I'm Skeptical. Swan Says,Be Skeptical All You Want, I'm Telling The Truth. Are You Implying I'm Famous Enough To Be Paul That Everyone Should Know What He Have Been Looked Like? Thanks. Falcon Says,Are You Serious? Swan Says,Nah. Relax, I Was Joking. But Really, Haven't You've Ever Looked Paul's Name Up? My Younger Self's Face Is Literally On The First Results Page. Seriously. Falcon Says,I Believe You. I Wouldn't Waste My Time On The Internet, Especially Not For Paul. The Invention Of The Computer Has Dumbened This Pathetic Generation. I Know That Makes Me Old Fashioned In A Sense. Swan Says,You Do Sound Old. Have You've Forgotten You're Part Of This Generation? Wouldn't You Also Be Implying That You, Too, Are Just Like Everyone Else In This Generation? Falcon Didn't Respond To That, Fearing Anything She Tried To Shoot Back Would Just Leave Her Even More Embarrassed. Swan Adjusted The Tonearm, Cautiously Lowering The Needle In Place. The Sound That Followed Was, Well, A Little Too Cheery. Particularly For Falcon Who Wanted To Just Cover Her Ears And Smash The Record Player In Pieces. But As She Listened Closely, Beneath The Upbeat Singing And The Out Of Place Instruments (Were Those Kazoos He Was Hearing?), That The Lyrics And General Composition Weren't Even That Bad. As The Next Song Came On, It Fortunately Had A Slower Tempo. The Singing Was Moodier To The Point That It Sounded... Seductive? Falcon Tried To Brush It Off, Focusing On The Song Itself. Still, That Alluring Drawl Made Her Kind Of Weak In The Knees. Continuing To Listen To The Album, She Overlooked The Cheery Parts And Appreciated It As A Whole. Despite How Beautiful They Were, How Beautiful Paul's Voice Was (And Arguably Still Was). When The Last Song Ended, Swan Lifted The Tonearm And Turned The Player Off. There Was A Black Satin Long King Size Oversized 25 Sectional Sofa Which Is Full Sleeper Section Includes 5 Inch Inner Spring Mattress With Rainbow Multicolored Colorchanging Pillows. It Has A Matching Ottoman That Fits In The Corners Of The Sofa. Swan Sat Down And Watched As Falcon Seated Herself Next To Him. As She Spoke,Falcon Leaned Down And Brushed Her Lips Against The Top Of His Head. Falcon Says About The Room,It's Nice In Here. Swan Says,Not As Nice As You, Sweetie. Falcon Says,Back At Ya. Do You Think You Can Sleep Now? You're Feeling Sleepy, Very, Very Sleepy. Swan Says,Sleepy? I Don’t Know,Maybe Just A Little. He Closed His Eyes And Allowed Himself To Rest Cradled In The Sanctuary Of Falcon's Arms. Swan Says,Don't Let Me Go. Please Don’t Leave Me,Falcon... Please, I'm Begging. He Could Feel His Heartbeat Practically Racing As It Hammered Against The Walls Of His Chest. Falcon Promised,I Won't Let Go. I Won’t, Trust Me. Just Try And Rest Now. I'll Take Care Of You.
Swan Nodded, But Contrary To His Unwillingness To Go Sleep,He Eventually Drifted Off. Opening The Drawer Below The Desk, Falcon Sorted Through Them And Thought About Which Paul Williams Album She Was Going To Pick. Finding A Good One, She Grinned As He Pulled It Out. As She Flipped It Over On The Desk, She Caught Sight Of The Image On The Cover. It Was Paul Williams Seen In Those Old Photographs. She Djusted The Tonearm, Cautiously Lowering The Needle In Place. Soft Swells Of Music Filled Falcon's Ears As She Stopped Everything She Was Doing And Started Listening To The Words To The Paul Williams Song That Was Currently Playing. As The Words Filled Her Ears, Her Eyes Widened. People Looked Right Through Me When I Was All Alone Never Seemed To Notice I Was There At All Always Seemed To Look The Other Way Winter Days Were Colder When I Was All Alone Wasn't I Surprised To Feel This Warm Inside The Way It Feels To Be Alone With You So If I Try To Hold You And I Might Try To Make You Stay Remember I Have Tried To Hold The Colors Of The Morning Sun Tned To Keep It Shining When The Summer's Day Was Done Falcon Felt A Little Saddened As She Listened To The Lyrics. So You Must Know That I Was Lonely When I Was All Alone Love Was Not An Easy Word To Laugh About And Still It's Not An Easy Word To Say When I Was All Alone Wasn't I Surprised To Feel This Warm Inside The Way 'T Feels To Be Alone With You So If I Try To Hold You And I Might Try To Make You Stay Remember I Have Tried To Hold The Colors Of The Morning Sun Tried To Keep It Shining When The Summer's Day Was Done When I Was All Alone It Was A Song Both She And Swan Could Relate To, The Waking Up Alone, Never Wanting The Warm Summer Nights To End And Dread The Winter. Falcon Listened To The Song Through To The End On Repeat And Felt The Tears Brimming Beneath Her Eyes. It Was As Though Paul Was Singing That Song Just For Her To Show How She Really Felt With Swan,Deeply Regretting Not Being There To Prevent Soyna's Abuse To Swan And Sam Years Ago. Falcon Slowly Looked Down At Swan As He Dozed Off On Her Chest. The Way Swan Was Acting Reminded Her Like A Puppy Wanting Love And Affection. She Smilies At This Thought. Swan Was Sleeping With A Sad Smilie. She Could Tell Swan Needed Her Love And Affection Much Like A Puppy Wants More Love And Sometimes Begging For It. She Pondered At This Thought Until She Knew She Had To Be Careful To Approach Him With Her Loving Affection,Gestures Or She Would Scare Him Off Like A Deer. She Continued To Ponder At This Thought As She Saw Darkness But With A Spotlight Source Which Was A Kaleidoscope Dimmed Abstract Colored Lighting That Changes Rainbow Glowing Colors In The Shapes That Moved In The Lighting By The Mood And Tone Of The Dark Room. The Led Projection Kaleidoscope Lighting Is Shaped Like A Large Crystal Kaleidoscope Cylinder In The Middle Of The Ceiling. The Color Spectrum Lighting Changed Color By How Falcon Feels Much Like A Mood Ring Changed Colors To Show A Person's Mood. The Abstract Animated Lighting Immersed Falcon And Swan Whole. She Noticed The Rainbow Colors Change Into Blue To Symbolize A Calm Quiet Mood. Then It Changed Into Plum Purple And Neon Green Colors Symbolize That They Felt More Calm And More Quiet. She Sadly Smiled At Herself,Dug Her Fingers Into Swan's Hair Gently. Forgetting Everything Else She Had Intended On Doing, Falcon Remained Wrapped In The Cocoon Of Swan's Warmth. She Closed Her Eyes. Falcon Says,Oh, Swan, I Love You And I Will Do Everything I Can To Protect You, Promise. She Swore Under Her Breath Just Before She, Too, Fell Asleep. She Began To Doze Off And The Lighting Shut Off Automatically And Everything Went To Black In Complete Darkness. When She Opened Her Eyes Again, She Was Lying Beneath The Covers, The Cave Was Dark, And Swan Was Beginning To Wake Up. Swan Sighed And Groaned While Stretching Up,Laying His Back On Falcon's Arm, What Was That? Swan Ran His Hand Rubbing Through His Wavy Blonde Hair. Falcon Says,My Arm. Swan Says,I Can Tell Now. Swan Got Up And Sees Falcon Struggling To Get Up Falcon Held Swan's Hand And Tried To Get Up, Swan Pulled Her Backward To Get Her Up. She Stood On Her Feet. Swan Says,You're Welcome. Falcon Says,Hey, I Was About To Say Thank You. Swan Says,I Know. I Just Went Ahead And Said You're Welcome So You Won't Have To. Falcon Says,Oh, You're Silly. Swan Says,I'm A Silly Swan Falcon Says,But You Don't Look Like A Bird. Swan Says,Hahah, You're So Funny. They Walk Out Of The Cyclia Rainbow Relaxing Room. As They Walk Back, They See The Pulsating,Animated Psychedelia Colorchanging Floor Timed And Mood To Simon Garfunkel Sounds Of Slience. "This Whole Place Is So Beautiful," Falcon Marveled, Looking Around Curiously. "I Don't Know Why I Was Bothered By Not Finding An Exit Earlier." "I'm Hot, My Feet Hurt, I'm Hungry," Swan Mocked Her. Falcon Playfully Punched His Shoulder. "Oh, You Pack A Punch, Girl," Swan Said. "You're Thirsty? Let Me Know, I Got You Covered," Falcon Said. "Haha, No Thanks," Swan Replied. "I'm Not Complaining About Not Being Able To Find An Exit To The Cyclia Ever Again," Falcon Said. "If You Could Be Trapped In The Cyclia Forever With One Person, Who Would It Be?" Swan Asked. Falcon Looked At Him A Bit Teary Eyed. "I See Where You're Going. In All Reality, That Is A Very Hard Question To Answer, But I Would Choose You," She Replied. Swan Smiled At Her Smile.

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise

[swan1974-blog]

Swan writes special needs story

Swan goes to his computer and writes a story, Swan typed and the words appear saying, A special needs handicapped male named Johnny dates a non-disabled religious girl, His girlfriend takes him to her deeply religious southern parents Her father sees the boy and looked concerned at the boy being special needs. Her father asked,Why does he act like that? Is he fucking shitty retarded? Just look at him! The girl says to her father,Don’t be a jerk. No, he’s mentally handicapped and has special needs. What is wrong with you that you have to harshly discriminate someone you don’t even know? Her father felt guilt that he was discriminated and judged the special needs male since he never been around one before. Her father says,Listen to me. I hope you don’t mind that he would be a burden to you, you know because he has special needs. The girl says,He’s not a burden. He’s a blessing. Her father says,Blessing you say? Is he Mentally capable of marrying and having sexual intercourse, you know since he has special needs? The girl felt shock and very angry at her father. Her father says,Did you hear what I said? So he’s very retarded to do sex and kissing even do anything with you? Are you sure about that guy? The girl was getting very offended and yelled, Yes, yes, I’m sure about him! Why don’t you shut your face about him? The father says very vile offensive things about Johnny, He is disabled. It’s a abomination to God! Don’t you know? I will not allow my daughter to date and marry a very fucking shitty retard! Didn’t you forget? We treat special needs people like homosexuals like being extremely violent to them,sterilize them all because it is so bad. God intended man and woman,not special needs man and woman. Listen! The girl was appalled by her fathers words and yelled, You don’t sound very Christian. Special needs isn’t a sin. It’s not a choice. Homosexuality is a choice, a sin. But we don’t have the right to mistreat either one. Her dad ran over and punched the boy,sending him to the floor. The father yelled obscene vile offensive things remarks about the special needs boy, Why don’t you stand up? The boy cringed as his foot made contact with his stomach. The boy was sprawled out on the floor, taking it quietly. The boy bit his lip so hard that it bled – screaming just made it worse. He grabbed the boy’s hair and pulled him off the floor, and glared at him. The father violently spat in the boy’s face,yelling at him, I bet you can’t throw a punch! He was still talking, insults rolling off his tongue as he bashed the boys head into the wall repeatedly. The boy clenched his fists and squeezed his eyes shut, loudly screaming. knowing it would be over soon. He was bruised and cut everywhere, and now he was pretty sure the back of his head was bleeding, too. He Moans And Yells Like A Blubbering Child. He Shrinks Into A Corner But Is Yanked Out For More Pummeling. They all Just Stare In Silence. It’s Not A Street Fight, Not A Punching Match. Just A Ruthless Thrashing That Would Be Hard To Watch. The father Stops The Whipping And Stands Over The boy Who Is Lying On The Ground Whimpering, Pleading For Mercy. The boy says,Please stop. The father stepped back and dropped him, He had his Blood on his hands. and the boy collapsed to the floor, panting. The boy screamed in pain,Stop it already! You’re being so cruel. You’re Hurting Me. I haven’t done anything wrong. Stop. Please. The father violently kicked the boy again,seeing him scream with pain, The blood dripping down His face. The father screamed and yelled, Oh, go crying to mommy. The boy was openly crying,whining in pain like a little scared puppy. He had a mind of a scared child who wanted to be accepted realizing that people aren’t ready for special needs love. The boy scrambles to his feet,Shakes with dread. He Looks like a scared little boy,while trembling badly. He supported himself on his hands and knees, tears sliding out of his eyes and dripping onto the tiles in his girlfriends house. He was shaking and bloody and dizzy, and with all of that and the crying, He couldn’t breathe properly. He gasped for air and collapsed onto his girlfriends side, Dying in her arms. The girl sobbed as she heard him say I love you. There was a dimmed spotlight creating a darkness mood on the girl. She could hear him singing in a child like voice, I don’t want to see you go, I don’t even want to be there I will cover up my eyes And pray it goes away You’ve only lived a minute of your life I must be dreaming, Please stop screaming I don’t like to hear you cry You just don’t know How deep that cuts me So I will cover up my eyes And it will go away You’ve only lived a minute of your life I must be dreaming, Please stop screaming.. The girl sees the boy smiling at her and he closed his eyes,drifting off to sleep The end. Swan finished typing the story and stared at it for a few minutes. Falcon walked over and sees swan giving a sad smile. Swan sighed and says to falcon,Sadly, I think the story shows just how fucked up deep-rooted misperceptions are of people with disabilities. disabled is still not a bad word, something being a disability is still not a bad thing, and i still find it insulting when people say something isn’t a disability to indicate it deserves respect. i get not wanting to personally identify with a word, but i feel this sort of attitude is literally throwing people under the bus for no reason Falcon says,I agree with you, I hated that happen to you. Swan says,thanks mom? Falcon says,I’m your sister but I liked being called mom found you want Swan smiles.

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise #disabilties #handicap #emotional abuse

[swan1974-blog]

Falcon

After Walking About Half A Kilometer, They Reached A Planetarium Themed Door They Could See Was What Looked To Be A Starry Night Sky On The Door. It Was As Though Swan Who Had Designed The Room Door Had Done His Homework On It. The Rainbow Stars And Constellations Were Properly Positioned And Moving Animated In The Door With A Sign Saying The Neon Labyrinth Room Above The Doorway. Falcon Says About The Door,I Like It. Why I Like It Because Of The Colorful Design And Patterns. Swan Says,I'm Glad You Like It. I Like It Too For The Same Reasons. Falcon Opens The Door For Swan. Falcon Says,I Opened The Door. For You My Lady! You're Welcome. Swan Fumed And Says,Don't Call Me A Lady. Falcon Smirked And Says,But You Have Feminine Traits. Swan Says,So? Doesn't Mean I Want To Be Called A Lady. Falcon Says,Well, Sorry, I Was Just Teasing. She Closed It Behind Her As She Followed Swan. They Were In The Uv Black Fluorescent Lit Room That Was Illuminated By Neon Splatters That Changed Color. Falcon Admired The Bright Colors, Which Instantly Reminded Her Of Willy Wonka. Falcon Says About The Room,Reminds Me Of Willy. Swan Says,Who? Falcon Says,Willy. Swan Says,Who's Willy. Falcon Says,You Know Who, Willy Wonka The Chocolatier. Swan Says,I'm Just Teasing. With A Heavy Sigh, Falcon Trudged Into The Dark And Colorful Room. As They Moved Along Together In Different Directions, All Of The Splatters Changed Into Colors And Then Into Squiggles. The Squiggles Soon Morphed Into Swirls, Which Suddenly Illuminated On Them. Falcon Flinched As An Rainbow Swirl Shone On Her. Falcon Says,Amazing How The Patterns Randomly Change. Swan Says,Just Like Life. Falcon Says,I Know. My Love For Willy Never Ceased, Even The Night He Confessed He No Longer Loved Me. Swan Says,I'm Sorry To Hear That. I Don't Think Willy Was In His Right Mind, To Be Honest, And He Feels Sorry For Saying That. Falcon Says,I Hope That's The Case. How Did We Start Talking About Willy? Ugh. Swan Says,You Have Me. Falcon Says,I Know. Falcon Muttered Under Her Breath As She Felt The Floor Gradually Shifting Upward, The Floor Keeps Tilting Side To Side To Give Off A Dizzy Experience. The Floor Changed Color Like Crescents Moving Rounded Rooms Side Up As Is Traveled Through The Hallways And Changing Colors As It Went In The Other Direction. Swan Says,What Did You Say? Falcon Says,I Said I Am Tired Of Talking About Willy. Swan Says,Then Stop. I'll Play Dumb Like I Did Earlier And Pretend I Don't Know Who You're Talking About. Falcon Says,Thanks. They Found Themselves Rapidly Descending Downward. Swan Says,So How're You? Falcon Says,I'm Just Fine And Dandy. Swan Says,Well Isn't It Just Fine And Dandy That You Are Fine And Dandy Because That Is So Fine And Dandy. Falcon Says,Repeating Words Doesn't Amuse Me. She Could Hear Swan Whistling "Pure Imagination" From Afar Which Further Irritated Her. A Rainbow Blob Suddenly Splattered On The Wall Facing Them. Swan Says,I Hope The Whistling Doesn't Further Irritate You. Falcon Says,I Know You Were Whistling Pure Imagination Just Like Willy Would. Swan Says,Who Is Willy? Falcon Says,Oh Yeah. Swan Says,I Am Afraid To Say I Don't Know Where We Are Right Now. Oh Dear, Looks Like We've Reached A Dead End. Never Mind That. Moving Along Now. We Shouldn't Let Obstacles Stop Us From Our Destination. Swan Politely Told Her As He Lead Falcon Towards The Right. Falcon Says,Ugh. What If We're Trapped In Here Forever? Swan Says,At Least We Will Be Together. Falcon Says,I Know. Swan Says,Come On, There's A Way Out, There Has To Be. Falcon Says,Nah, You Probably Unintentionally Created A Black Hole. Swan Says,It's Not A Black Hole. Falcon Says,A Hole That Where Things Enter But Never Come Out? Yep, Definitely A Black Hole. Swan Says,Lets Hope Not. The Journey Through The Labyrinth Seemed Endless To The Runner-Ups, With Many More Dead Ends And Sharp Turns. Falcon Whined,My Feet Hurt. When Is This Maze Ever Gonna End?! I'm Tired. Swan Says,I Can Carry You. Falcon Says,Yeah Right I'm Bigger Than You. I'm Hungry. Can I Eat You? Swan Says,No Thanks. Falcon Says,What Makes You Think You Can Pick Me Up? Swan Says,I Exercise Everyday, And Though I May Not Have Highly Defined Muscles, I Am Fit Enough To Outrun You And Lift Weights. Haha, I Won't Let You Make Supper Of Me, Not That I Think You're Serious. Falcon Smiled Upon Hearing Swan's Facts. Falcon Says,I Wouldn't Eat You. Swan Says,I Wouldn't Want To Eat You Either. How Did We Get Into This Subject? Falcon Says,Just Joking Around As Usual. Swan Says,I'm Afraid To Say I Don't Know Where We Are, But There Has To Be An Exit Somewhere, There Has To Be. Falcon Says,I Hope So. Swan Says,I'd Rather Be Stuck Here With You Than Anyone Else. Falcon Says,Awe, You Flatterer, Back At You. Swan Says,I Love You. Falcon Says,I Love You, Too. Swan Smiled, Happy To See Falcon Bouncing Back As They Hit Yet Another Dead End. Swan Says,Awe, Man, Another Dead End! Falcon Says,I Know Right? Swan Says,Lets Go This Way, We Have To Be Getting Closer. Falcon Says,Do You Want To Get Away From Me That Badly? Swan Says,Oh, No, No, No, No, Never Again. Falcon Says,Is That The Exit Over There? Swan Says,Maybe. Falcon Says,I Really Hope That Is The Exit. Swan Says,Me Too. After Walking Several More Miles, They Hit A Dead End With A Neon Rainbow Blob. Swan Says,Well, Look At What We Have Here. Now, You Have Successfully Traveled Through My New Neon Labyrinth, But The Journey Is Far From Over. Just So You Know. Swan Says,What Do You Think? Falcon Says,Beautiful. Swan Says,What Do You Mean By Beautiful? Falcon Says,You Know, The Colors, The Design, Etc. Swan Says,Awe, Thank You! Falcon Says,I Have A Feeling You Were Thinking I Was Aiming The Beautiful Comment At You. Swan Says,I Was, Thanks! Look At Here, Not At Me This Time. Swan Announced As The Rainbow Blob Was Revealed To Be A Tunnel. Swan Led Falcon Into A Tunnel Of Muticolored Stained Glass Crystal-Like Shapes Walls Made Of Ultra-Refractive Material That Shimmers And Changes Color With Psychedic Lights Looming Over Them On The Ceiling Of The New Hallway After The Neon Labyrinth Room. Falcon Says About The Tunnel,Gorgeous. Swan Says,Thanks. Falcon Says,Not As Gorgeous As You, Of Course. Swan Says,Awe, Thank You! Falcon Says,I Love You. Swan Says,I Love Me Too!

#swan #phantom of the paradise

[swan1974-blog]

Swan and falcon

Swan Smiled When He Felt Her Arms Wrapping Around Him, The Warmth Of Her Hold Somehow Drawing Him In And Making Him Feel An Extreme Abundance Of Emotion. His Gaze Returned To Falcon Who Lay Wrapped Securely In His Arms. He Never Would Have Imagined That She Would So Willingly Trust Him Enough To Rest There, But A Slight Smile Covered His Face As He Maintained His Gentle Hold On Her. Perhaps If Anything, This Was The Silver Lining To This Whole Sordid Mess. As Her Sobs Subsided, She Began To Back Away From Him, Her Head Rising Until Her Eyes Met His. Falcon Says,I Feel So Bad. All Of This After I Said So Many Cruel Things About Him, I Still Love Him. I Was Treating Him Like He Was Still The Same Man He Was After Sam's Death, Apathetic And Mean. He Is A Different Man Than Before. Swan Sings A Verse From Lonely Hearts By Paul Williams, My Time Is Your Time The Song Begins The Move Starts The Sweet Life The Lovers And What About The Lonely Hearts? Lonely Hearts Tired Eyes Seldom Wins, Always Tries When You Don't Belong Always Say Things Wrong When You've Looked So Long And Wound Up Lost Again Falcon Shook Her Head With A Smile, As Guilty Tears Began To Stream From Beneath Her Eyes. Falcon Says About The Song,Why Are You Singling That Song? She Said Shyly All The While Noticing How His Vest Was Covered With The Moisture From Her Tears. Swan Explained Why He Sang Lonely Hearts, I Remembered Searching For True Love. I Didn't Find It In Sonya, But Elsewhere. You Haven't Found True Love, Have You? She Nodded And Says,I Don't Feel I Have, But I May Have In You. Falcon Began To Talk About Paul Williams. Falcon Teased,Was It You Singing, Swan? You Were Singing It Right,Not Paul? I Know You're Not Paul, But I Swear I Exactly Heard Paul's Singing Voice When You Sang. I Love It. Falcon Knew That Swan Hates Being Called Paul Williams, Swan Living In Paul's Famous Songwriter Shadow With Little Jealousy Over Paul's Songwriter/Singing Career And Fame. Swan Says,I'm Fine With You Complimenting Me. Just Stop Comparing To Paul, I Know We're Twins, But I Know I Just Sing And Sound Like Him, And I May Even Sound A Little Like A Girl. Falcon Says,You're Voice Is Cute And Adorable. Your High, Thin Little Voice Singing Voice Is Like Listening To Young Paul In His 1970'S Titled Albums And Songs. Your Singing Brings Back Memories. The Voice Was Different Back Then, But The Heart’s The Same. And The Songs Will Always Be About Love. And Oh, The Albums Feature A Wealth Of Lesser-Known Gems That Boast The Same Open-Hearted Intimacy And Straightforward Melodic Appeal Of His Hits. He Is The Best Artist. Swan Says About One More Angel Song,One More Angel Makes Me Think Of Sam Every Time. Does The Song Remind You Of Her, Too? Falcon Says,Yes, And Willy, Replacing The Feminine Pronouns With Masculine Pronouns, Of Course. Always The Instrumental Breaks Are Lovely, And The Lyrics Are Heartbreaking-He's Always So Emotional With His Music, Which I Love. He's Not One Bit Boring. He Sounded Great, The Emotions In His Voice Matching The Mood Of The Song And Lyrics. Why Do I Think That In A Sad Song He Sounded Sad And In A Love Song He Sounded Loving. Swan Says,I Agree. Falcon Says,Doesn't His Songs Help You Go Through Things In Your Life Like It Does Mine? Swan Says,Yes. I Was Always Dealing With Deafness And Blindness And Having To Lip Read Ever Since I Was Born. How I Dealt With It Was I Got Glasses And Hearing Aids. I Often Rely On Other Sensory Clues To Figure Out With Whom Im Are Interacting. Look At My Hearing Aids. Swan Pulls His Hair Back To Let Falcon See His 2 Hearing Aids Molds On Both Ears Which Were Red And Black Swirls With The Battery Door Is Red And Tubing Is Black. Falcon Says,I Like Them. I Remember And Seen How You Wanted To Hide Them So People Won't Question You. Do You Still Remember To Take Them Off When You Went To Bed And Put Them On Every Day. I Don't Really Want To Remind You Because I Don't Want To Seem Pushy Or Bossy. Swan Says,It's Okay, You're Not Pushy Or Bossy. I Was Always Hiding My Hearing Aids In Both Ears In My Long Hair To Look Normal. Lip Reading Can Only Help Me Understand So Much What Someone Is Saying. How Would You Help Me With My Difficulties With Lip Reading, If You Can? Not Minding That I Ask For You To Repeat What You Said If I Always Don't Get It. Is That Okay? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,You May Already Know I Am Extremely Introverted. I Don't Really Understand The Situation When I Get Out Of Public And Being More Vulnerable Position Using My Disabitity Because It Is Harder For Me To Understand What Is Going On Around Me. I Always Hating The Loud Sounds And Noises And The Like Because Too Much Noise Leads To Confusion. I Hate Being Discriminated Of My Disabitity Because It Is Not Right. I Am Human, Too. Me Taken Advantage Of Because Of My Deaf And Blind Disability By My Non Disabled Partners Like Soyna For Example. She Thought I Was Too Dumb To Make My Own Intellectual Decisions. I'm Defidently Be More Vulnerable, Possibly Not Sure Where The Next Attack Is Coming From Sonya When She Abused Me And Sam. Oh Gosh, That Woman Was Unpredictable! Sam Even Used Sign And Let Me Lip Read Her To Help Me Describe What's Happening To Me And Her, And Most Importantly Why. Falcon Says,How Would You Support People Who Are Also Deaf Blind? Swan Says,Good Question. I Would Pressure The Nick Network To Have A Deaf And Blind Character In Icarly Because It Is Hard To Find A Character Like That. I'm A Deaf And Blind Activist By The Way. What Do You Think? Falcon Says,Deaf Blind Individuals Can Watch And Relate To The Character. Swan Says,That's Right. I Didn't Have My Hearing Aids On In The Morning When I Sleep, Because I Can't Sleep With Them On. They Make A High Pitched Squealing Sound When I Lay My Head On The Pillow. How Would You Wake Me Up If I Couldn't Hear You. What Would You Do? Falcon Says,Shake You Awake? Swan Says,Yes, Gently, Of Course. Falcon Says,How About Throwing A Bucket Of Cold Water On You? Swan Says,Brrrr, Don't Be Surprised If I Dump A Bucket Of Cold Water On You Later! Falcon Says,Okay, Onto A More Serious Note. How Would You Let Me Know To Speak Louder If The Cyclia Kaleidoscope Room Is Too Loud For You To Hear Me? Can You Turn The Music Off? You Having A Hard Time Listening To Me While Hearing Loud Music. I Know You Try To Listen To Understand. Trying Hard To Read My Lips. Reading Lips Is 90% Affective. Swan Explained,I Can Read Lips Really Well, Actually, And You Can Talk Loudly In My Ear. Falcon Says,Okay, Gotcha! Swan Says While Hearing His Right Hearing Aid Died Off Not Able To Hear Falcon, Thanks A Lot, My Hearing Aid Battery Is Making A Strange Noise. Knowing That She Heard Swan's Hearing Feedback Died Off, Falcon Signs Him What Is It Swan Can You Hear Me? Swan Was Offended And Politely Explained,My Hearing Aid Battery Died. I'm Verbal And Never Learned To Sign Because I Never Felt The Need For It. I Can Read Your Lips, Not Sign Language. I Should Ask You To Be Louder And Clear If I Would Hear You While Lip Reading. Will You Do That, Please? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,Thank You. Falcon Goes In Her Purse To Give Swan His Package Of Hearing Aid Batteries. Swan Says While Putting The Battery In His Hearing Aid,Thanks For Keeping Spare Batteries For Me. He Puts It Back On His Ear. Falcon Says,Can You Hear Me Now? Swan Says,Yes. I Still Need You To Get Me And Make Large Print Copies Of Screenplays I Get From The Mail About Icarly. It Really Helps Me To Read And Not Strain My Eyes. A Closed Captioned Phone Because I Can See The Words That Are Being Said In The Screen, In Case I Don't Understand What's Being Said, Causing Less Frustration For Me, And Less Frustration To The Person I'm Talking To. To Suit My Disability Needs What Do You Think? Falcon Said,Sounds Good To Me Whatever Helps. What About Closed Captioning On Icarly And Zoey 101? Just For You Because The Same Reason You Use Close Captioned Phones. I Always Do That For You If You Stop Pestering Me About Where They Are At! Don't You Know You Pester Me? Swan Says,No Idea. Falcon Says,Just Kidding. You Can't Even Hear Everything I Say Coming Out Of My Mouth. It Is Really Important For You To Maintain Eye Contact. It Sometimes Really Frustrates Me If You Say I Can Hear You When You're Not Hearing Me Correctly. Would You Do That? Swan Groaned And Says,I Don't Have To Look At You To Hear You. Falcon Says,Yes You Do! Don't Get Stubborn With Me! Swan, I Have Been Too Kind To You. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,It's Like You Don't Want To Listen To Me. Just Give Me The Hearing Aid Clip On Microphone So You Can Hear Me Better, Or Else I Won't Talk To You. Lip Reading Doesn't Always Help You Even You Miss What I'm Saying. You Hear Me? Swan Protested,No. Falcon Says,Swan, Please. I'm Not Asking You To Stand On Your Head And Spin Around Singing The Abc's. I Even Notice You Always Stare Off In Space When I Try To Talk To You, You're Not Fooling Me. It Means You Can't Really Hear Me Because You Won't Look In My Direction. Swan Says,I Can Hear You. Falcon Says,I Can't Tell! Swan Says,Well, Trust Me I Can. Falcon Says,You Need To Respond Correctly. Swan Sighed And Gives Her The Clip On Microphone From His Pocket, Falcon Puts It In Her Pocket And Clips It On Her Shirt Near Her Mouth. Falcon Says,Thank You, Swan. Do You Hear Me Now? Tell Me. Swan Lied,No. Falcon Was Frustrated And Says,You Can't Even Respond No If You Couldn't Hear Me. Do You Have Your Mic Setting On Your Hearing Aids On? Do You? Do You? Do You? Swan Grumbled And Says,Stop Pestering Me. Falcon Says,I Wouldn't Pester Me If You'd Stop Being Stubborn. If You Don't Understand Or Get Something I Say, Let Me Know. Don't Be Afraid To Say Can You Repeat It Or Make It Simple So I Can Understand You Well. Do You Comprehend? Swan Says,Yes? Falcon Says,Thank You. Swan Says,I Don't Like This Thing. Falcon Says,Why? Swan Puts On The Mic Setting On His Hearing Aids And Hears Falcon Better. Falcon Says,Why? Swan Says,It Looks Funny. Falcon Says,I Had A Friend Who Used One In School, People Just Assumed She Was Allowed To Listen To Her Ipod In School. She Had To Explain It Wasn't An Ipod. Swan Says,Oh, Cool, Good To Know. I Assume People Think That I'm Mentally Handicapped Or Retarded Because I Can't Hear Well. Falcon Says,That Is Nonsense. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,Then Stop Thinking That!

#swan #paul williams

[swan1974-blog]

Falcon and swan

Paul Sees Falcon Reese Swan And Paul's Twin Eldest Sister Coming From The Front Door And They Are Both Walking To The Living Room Together. Falcon Is Taller Than Swan And Paul, She Is About 5 Foot 9 She Is 24 Looking Like 18,Never Aging Like Swan. Fair Skin With Plump Cheeks Like Swan's, Gingery Blonde Hair, Green Eyes, Circular Glasses. She Likes A Lot Older Movies, Black And Whites, Silent Movies, Mainly. She Loves To Read As Well, And Listen To Music,Especially Paul Williams. She Probably Always Looking Out For Swan While Hovering A Little Bit, Just Generally Being Overprotective Much Like In This Sense A Momma Swan Protects Her Little Swanling. She'd Baby Swan A Lot, Not Really Let Him Go Off On His Own. Acting Like The Atypical Protective Older Sibling, And While It Bugs Swan, She's Super-Protective Of Swan And Tends To Baby Him A Lot, And Maybe She Teases And Embarrasses Him From Time To Time She'd Probably Pick Him Up, Hold Him Tight, Hug Him, Maybe Hum Or Sing A Little To Comfort Him. They Still Care Greatly For One Another, And Look Out For Each Other She Tends To Twiddle Her Thumbs And Rock On Her Heels A Lot, And She Always Brushing Her Hair Out Of Her Face. She Likes To Sing Randomly And Poke People, And Tell A Lot Of Bad Puns And Jokes. Probably Always Looking Out For Swan And Always Treating Him Like A Kid. She Is Very Bold In Her Words And Actions. She Tends To Have A Very Sarcastic Tone And Does Not Give Up Easily If At All. She Is Gifted In Art, Music, Architecture, And Reading. She Is Willing To Take Risks No Matter The Consequences. She Likes Risk Taking, Reading, Sleeping, Eating, Hanging Out With Friends And Family, Music, Art, Talking, Debating, And Sarcasm. She Dislikes Being Corrected And Will Insists She Is Correct, Having Her Views Opposed, Being Quiet, Being Alone, People Touching Her Stuff, Standing Still, Or Sitting Still. She Like To Dress Fairly Casual, Usually Graphic Nerd T-Shirts And Jeans, But Also Like Summer Dresses, And, Of Course, Lots Of 70'S Clothing. She Wore A Brown Leather Vest With Peace And Love Stickers On The Vest, She Has Red And Black Swan Floral Patten Shirt With White Satin Scarf,Black Flared Bellbottoms That Reached To The Floor. Paul And Falcon Sit At The Comfy Couch,Waiting For Swan. Paul Says To Falcon,Nice To See You Again. Falcon Says,Nice To See You Again, Too. Paul Says,Swan Can't Wait To See You Again. Falcon Says,Really? Paul Says,Yes, Really. Falcon Says,I'm Glad To Hear That. Paul Says,Me Too. Falcon Says,So Swan Has Been Doing Okay Lately? Paul Says,Yes. Falcon Says,Good To Know. Paul Says,I Think He Feels Better Knowing You Ended Up Okay. Falcon Says,Awe, It Makes Me Feel Better Knowing He's Okay, Too. Paul Says,He's Sorry You Two Got Out Of Touch. Falcon Says,I Am, Too. Paul Says,So Am I. Falcon Says,At Least We Got To See Each Other Again. Paul Says,I'm Glad To Hear That. Falcon Says,So How Has His Little Darlings Been? Paul Says,They've Been Well. Falcon Says,That Is Great News! Paul Says,It Sure Is. Falcon Says,So They All Have Their Own Unique Rooms? Paul Says,Yes, Their Rooms Are Amazing. Falcon Says,I Can't Wait To See!

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise

[swan1974-blog]

Swan and falcon

After Several Moments Of Silence Passed. Falcon Looked At Him, Her Eyes Now Staring Into Swan’s Pair Of Sympathetic Blue Eyes. Falcon Says,I Can’t Believe How Kind You’ve Been To Me. Swan Says,I Would Do Anything For You, My Dear. Falcon Nodded, All The While Feeling The Tears Stinging Her Eyes. She Bit Down On Her Lip To Keep From Crying. It Would Have Been Easy For Her To Completely Fall Apart Right There In Front Of Him. Falcon Says,I Guess You Don’t Think I’m Too Clingy. Falcon Did Not Let Go, In Fact, She Held On Tighter And Pulled Swan Closer To Her Face. Falcon Says,But I Don’t Feel Wholly Wrong. Swan, Listen To Me, We’re Touching Each Other, We’re Being Friendly With One Another, We’re Spending Time Together And Cuddling And Having Fun, And Guess What? I Have No Fear. Everything Is Okay, Nothing Is Wrong, Everything Is Dandy Swan, You Know Why? There Is No Need To Be Afraid Anymore, Because I’ve Got You, And I Will Never Let Anything Bad Happen To You. You Need Not Fear Me, Because I Love You… I Hope You Feel The Same For Me. Swan Strongly Listened To The Desperate Heartbreak That Emerged In Her Words. He Stopped Struggling, But Kept His Eyes On The Floor In Sadness, His Face Was Burning Up As He Clearly Understood What Falcon Was Telling Him. Now, His Heart Seemed To Overflow With Indescribable Emptiness. Swan’s Heart Was Thundering And There Were Bright Red Patches On His Cheeks That Nearly Matched His Trademark Aviator Red Glasses He Used To Wear. Falcon Let Go Of One Of His Arms And Put A Hand To Swan’s Stained Cheek. Falcon Says,Oh, Sweetie, Don’t Be Afraid To Say I Love You, Too! Her Desperate Plea Tugging At Swan’s Heartstrings. She Raised Her Hand So That It Covered His. After Several Seconds, She Moved Her Hand Away From His And Looked Down At Her Lap. Her Heart Was Beating Loudly In Her Chest, And She Was Almost Certain That He Could Hear It. Guilt Washed Over Her, But She Kept Her Head Lowered So He Would Not See That Her Face Suddenly Felt Flushed. Swan Looked Up,Sadly Smiled And Says,Hush, You’ll Be Just Fine With Me. Falcon Says,I Know. She Looked At Him, The Grief And Sadness Suddenly Filling Her. Swan Says,I Love You. I Don’t Just Say That, I Really, Really Do. Swan Let One Of His Hands Began To Brush Her Hair Out From In Front Of Her Face. Falcon Shook Her Head, But Suddenly Felt His Arms Wrapping Around Her. She Could Feel Her Head Coming To Rest On His Shoulder. Instead Of Contemplating What Was Happening Or Why It Was Even Happening, She Allowed Herself To Return The Embrace, Her Weight Now Resting Against Him. Falcon Says,You’re Warm. Her Eyes Closing And The Tears Streaming From Beneath Them. Swan Without Thinking About What He Was Doing, He Moved His Hand So That He Could Touch Her Face. The Tears Left Her Skin Moist, And He Felt Himself Smearing Them Away. He Wanted To Kiss Her And Tell Her Everything Was Ok. Swan Says With Worry,Are You All Right? Falcon Ran Her Thumb Across Swan’s Face Comfortingly. Falcon Says,Everything Is All Right As Long As We Have Each Other. We Don’t Need To Do Anything You’re Not Ready For, Your Comfort The Utmost Important. I Just Want To Be Close To You, I Want You To Understand It’s Okay. What Do You Think? Swan Avoided Falcon’s Eyes, But Nodded, Side Glancing At Her For A Moment Swan Says,Falcon? Falcon Smiled, And Then Slowly, As If Approaching A Stray Dog, Lowered Her Face Close To Swan’s And Gave Him A Passionate French Kiss On The Lips,A Shiver Of Ecstasy Ran Though Swan’s Body Like A Static Shock. Swan Gave A Smug Grin As After Falcon Kissed Him. Swan Says About The Kiss And Smiled,That Was..Interesting. Oh Ok I Will Absolutely Be Your Boyfriend If You Want Me To, Hope You Be Happy. Falcon Smiled Up At Swan, Exposing Those Adorable Teeth. Falcon Says Happily With Excitement,I’m So Happy! Swan Smiled Upon Hearing These Words, But He Also Felt The Tears Brimming From Beneath His Eyes. Swan Says,So You’ve Enjoyed Our Date? Falcon Says,Yes! Well Swan, We’re A Little Dirty. We Should Probably Get Cleaned Up… We Should Go Now. Swan Gave Her A Weak Smile. Swan Says,Anything For You, My Dear. Falcon Closed Her Eyes And Nodded, The Tears Streaming Down Over Her Face And Meshing Against His Fingers. She Could Feel Herself Smiling Despite The Guilt That Seemed To Be Eating Away At The Core Of Her Being. As Swan Finished Wiping The Tears From Her Face, He Put A Gentle Arm Around Her Shoulder, Helped Her To Stand Up, And Started To Lead Her Away, Swan Says,Come, Lets Go. Now Tell Me Where It Is I Should Escort You To. I Am Willing To Take You Wherever You Want To Go. Swan Put His Arm Around Her And Pulled Her Into A Half Embrace. As She Felt His Hold On Her, She Pressed Herself Into The Embrace. Her Head Eventually Came To Rest Against His Chest, Her Hands Feeling The Softness Of His Shirt. As She Inhaled, She Could Immediately Detect The Soft Scent Of Peppermint As It Filled Her. She Closed Her Eyes, All The While Allowing Her Body To Lean Up Against His. For Several Minutes, They Stood In This Manner, Swan Practically Keeping Her On Her Feet. Falcon Cast A Glance Back Towards The Waterfall But Feeling Dizzy, She Stopped, Her Head Coming To Rest In Her Hands. Falcon Says,Man, What Was That. I Don’t Know, All I Knew Was I Glanced Back: Everything Is Suddenly Starting To Spin Out Of Control… What Is Going On? Without Contemplating What He Was Doing, He Carefully Picked Her Up In His Arms And Started To Carry Her Towards The Waterfall, As He Walked, He Looked Down At Her. Swan Says,I Asked Where You Wanted To Go. You Didn’t Tell Me Where,So I Was Taking You To The Waterfall. He Says With A Trace Of Playfulness Etched In His Voice. Falcon Says,I Don’t Care. Take Me Wherever You Wish, Swan, I Am At Your Mercy. She Allowed Her Body To Completely Relax In His Arms. Without Any Warning, She Allowed Her Arms To Wind Their Way Around Him And Hold Tightly To Him. This Action, If Anything, Showed Swan That Falcon Completely Trusted Him. He Slowly Walked Towards The Waterfall With Her Still Wrapped Securely In His Arms. Swan Says,Man, You’re So Cute When Being Carried. Taking A Deep Breath, He Smiled Down At Her, But Watched As Her Head Turned And Buried Itself Against His Chest. Falcon Says,I Got An Idea. I Wish We Would Watch Phantom Of The Paradise In The Swanage Theatre. What Do You Think? Swan Says,I Didn’t Think About That. That Sounds Like A Good Idea,Falcon. Why Don’t We Do That Sometime? Instead Of Releasing Her, He Tightened His Hold, But Stopped And Looked Down At Her, His Aqua Blue Eyes Filled With Gentility. Falcon Says,Sing Me A Song With Your Deep, Humble Voice Of Yours. Swan Hummed Pure Imagination To Himself While Carrying Falcon. Swan Runs Into The Waterfall,Goes Into The Walkway Under Of The Waterfall. He Stopped At The Wall Of The Waterfall Interior To See A Colorchanging Tie Dye Rainbow Spectrum Large Automatic Doors Faced Them That Was Fully Illuminated By Neon Splatters That Changed Color,All Of The Splatters Changed Into Rainbow Spectrum Colors And Then Into Squiggles. The Squiggles Soon Morphed Into Psychedelic Swirls. It Has A Sign Below The Top Of The Door Saying The Cyclia Rainbow Light Room In A Neon Rainbow Psychedelic Front On A Rainbow Lava Lamp Moving Animated Background Of The Sign. The Internal Led Lights In The Water Slowly Transition Colors To Create A Soft And Ambient Glow Effect And Simulate Movement Through The Rainbow Lava Lamp Background. The Colorful Door And Sign Reminded Falcon Of Psychedelic Light Shows When She And Swan Went To When They Were Younger In The 60’S. Falcon Says About The Door And The And Sign,I Like It. Why I Like It Because It’s So Beautiful And Unique And Colorful. I Like How The Colors Swift And Change Like Nothing I Have Ever Seen Before. Swan Says,I’m Glad You Like It. 50 Percent Colors Of The Rainbow, 40 Percent Neon With A Dash Of Pure Imagination. Color Is Nothing, Imagination Is Everything. Falcon Asked About The Room,You Came Up With The Design All By Yourself? Swan Says,I Was Inspired By Willy Wonka, But Never Copying His Works. Swan Went In The Rainbow Light Room While Still Holding Falcon In His Arms. They Were At A Dark Large Cave Dwelling Under The Waterfall Dimmed Lit Only Sporadically By The Multi-Color Colorchanging Led Rainbow Spectrum Lights,Showing The Decor. The Glass Walls Had Color Changing Lava On A Color Changing Rainbow Water Background Much Like A Mood Rings Changing Color. It Would Glow With Colored, Pulsating Lights Behind The Color Changing Lava. The Color Spectrum Lighting And Water Behind The Lava Gives That Colorful Glow, The Color Changing Lava Moving Up And Down Everywhere On The Walls. There Were Rainbow Color Spectrum Led Abstract Animated Floors That Changes Abstract Patterns Much Like A Psychedic Oil Light Show. The Bright Neon Abtract Translucent Or Technimation-Process Floor,
Using Rotating Polarized Discs Below A Thick Pexiglass Layer To Create An Animated Color Changing Effect So They Can See The Patterns In Full Detail Keyed To Music Tempo And Mood. It Had Recording The Lighting Data Program Adjacent To The Musical Sound Track On A Magnetic Tape System. The Tables And Chairs And Couches Were Tie Dyed Colors Of Shifting Various Shades Of Every Color Imaginable. The Colors Changed Constantly At A Blinking Of The Eye Speed. There Were Pictures On The Walls Of Flowers, Sunsets, Underwater Ocean Scenes, And Geometric Shapes That Would Disappear And Reappear Different Colors Every Time On The Walls. As The Bright Colors And Decor Greeted Her, Falcon’s Eyes Widened As She Took In The Vastness Of Color In Absolute Delight. It Was Splashed With Extreme Color And Light. Swan Says,Beautiful, Huh? Falcon Says,Not More Beautiful Than You.
Swan Says About The Cyclia Rainbow Light Room,It’s Pretty Neat. What Do You Think?
Falcon Says,I Love It. It’s Very Magical And Colorful Like A Pure Imagination.
It’s Pretty Cool. It Looks A Bit Of A 1970’S Neon/Disco Look To It. Why Do I Think That Is Because Of The Colors. The Cyclia Rainbow Light Room Is An Experience Both Powerful And Exquisite, Poetically Simple And Brilliantly Abstract. It Is Cyclonic Tornadoes Of Color, Exploding Images And Torrents Of Flashing Impressions. Why Do I Think That Because I Felt In Awe When I First Laid Sight On This Room. It Is Pure Theater In A Revolutionary New Form: A Perfectly Controlled, Unified Environment Of Movement, Images And Sound. Why Do I Think That Because I Can Hear And See It Vividly. Swan Says,Sounds Great. Falcon Says,It Is Great! Swan Says,I Know, Right? Falcon Says,Speaking Of Pure Imagination, Will You Sing For It Me, Please, If You Don’t Mind? Swan Sings, Come With Me And You’ll Be In A World Of Pure Imagination. Falcon Says,You Sound Amazing, Almost Like Willy Wonka. Swan Says,I Made This Room Designed Somewhat Like Willy Would. Why I Made This Room For Us Because Our Relationships Is Bright And Colorful And Vivid. Falcon Says,Wow, That’s Amazing. Swan Smiled And Says,Thank You. To Make The Experience Even More Surreal,Swan Wandered About The Room Singing About The Pure Imagination Which Had Gone Into The Making Of The Room. Swan Sings, If You Want To View Paradise, Simply Look Around And View It… Want To Change The World, There’s Nothing, To It. Falcon Smiled At Swan’s Singing. Swan Says,So You Really Love It? Falcon Says,Yes. Your Singing Is The Icing On The Cake. Swan Says,I’m Glad You Love It. Falcon Says,Not As Much As I Love You, Of Course. Swan Says,I Love You More. Falcon Says,How Can My Love Possibly Be Measured? Swan Says,How Can Mine Be Measured? It Can’t! Falcon Says,Exactly.

#swan #paul williams #phantom of the paradise