spid3namy

[spid3namy]

there are some songs i wish would just be injected into my body so badly

like that's how good they are fr

#☆ namy talks #☆ namy tedtalks #☆ namy won't shut the hell up #julie and the phantoms deserved a second season #those songs are literally so good

[spid3namy]

RESENTMENT: PT. 2

"how could you lie?" part one angel(s): e-42 miles morales & black fem reader includes: angst, infidelity, homewrecking, depressing themes, & heartbreak (men being disappointments per usual) synopsis: you used to describe your experience with love as one of complexity and simplicity all at once, but after you learn what your boyfriend did at a party with another girl while you were at home and sick, your heart is left with irreparable damage and an abundance of resentment. wc: 6.7k divider by @/cafekitsune a/n: this is gonna be my last sv fic for a hot min (or forever) 😭 savor and enjoy. ik the tag has been dead and you all have been malnourished, so yw! <3 icl, idk how i feel about it but y'all can lmk 🫶 (p.s: before ppl start nothing non-pg ever happened in this fic at any point in time. just kissing. ion get down like that 👍 thanks.)

when you arise in the morning and before you lay your head to rest at night, one thing is always definite: you are human.

humans are imperfect, so they make mistakes. genuine ones. honest ones. you’ve mixed up salt and sugar while baking chocolate chip cookies. you’ve hit your best friend square in the face while trying to spike a volleyball. you’ve missed assignment deadlines, forgotten about chores, and left the grocery list at home, all honest mistakes. a boy pressing his lips to another girl’s, though he has another he calls his own, is not a mistake. if it were up to you, it’d be a crime punishable by execution. between miles and yourself, no mercy was shown for the loyal one of you two, so why should he be granted any? infidelity; the act itself is the murder of the most important, sacred muscle, so why not return the favor?

you know your intentions before you give into the temptation of them. you knew miles knew. he knew from the moment that girl pulled him over to a vacant bedroom. did he think they’d simply exchange pleasantries? even so, why partake in such with someone who clearly has a taste for you? a taste for insulting the one you love most just as easily as she breathed?

these are all questions that would never be answered truthfully. you’d have to make peace with the reality or the only peace you’d know was the eternal kind that followed after death. and to think that you once believed in those stupid children’s fairy tales. miles made you believe that that kind of love could be real life. he almost made you believe you could attain the happy ending you always dreamed about. you were so close to it too. to have your bubble burst like that by the person you love most..? cold. way colder than the shivers repeatedly sinking down your spine.

it was a stupid idea to leave your window open.

the medicine you had taken for your cold had you knocked out in the warmth of your bed and you slept soundly. the chilly air would blow through the curtains now and then. the wind was only a light breeze at first. it felt nice, maybe even comforting, but when night finally fell, the current picked up. you were woken up by an icy blast hitting your face.

you groaned and slowly rose up, pulling the covers off of you before you swung your legs off of the bed. you drowsily staggered to your window and forced it shut, drawing the curtains closed only seconds afterward. you would just have to hope the mishap wouldn’t make you any sicker than you already were. you mindlessly carried yourself back to your bed and submerged yourself under the covers. you grabbed your phone, which was lying face down beside you.

you unlocked your phone and went straight to instagram, tapping through everyone's stories. most of the people you knew were at the party. parties weren't your cup of tea, so you couldn't really say you wished you had gone. you were more of a homebody than you'd like to admit.

you eventually got to miles' story. all he had posted was a single picture of him and his group of friends, and they all seemed to be enjoying themselves. seeing your boyfriend happy made you happy. you smiled to yourself before switching to your messages app. you had notifications from both miles and your friends who were also at the halloween party. you opened miles’ messages first.

9:37pm

miles: hey ma (9:37 pm) miles: i know you’re probably sleeping right now, but i wanted to lyk that i got here okay (9:37 pm) miles: i’m with my friends (9:38 pm) miles: ima go now but i love you 💗 i’ll text you soon (9:39 pm)

10:23 pm

miles: yooo just checking in 🙌 miss you a lot (9:36 pm) miles: hope you’re enjoying that nap ❤️❤️(9:37 pm)

you: hey i’m up now 😈😈 (10:52 pm) you: i saw your ig story 🙃 looks like you guys are having fun so i’ll leave you to it (10:52 pm) you: text me later, i love you so much more 💓 (10:53 pm)

you swiped out of your text thread with miles and opened your group chat with your three best friends, sasha, lani, and nae. while you met sasha and lani not too long ago, you’ve known nae for damn near your entire life.

dollz 💘 9:13pm

sasha: how’s my bedridden baby? 🫶🫶 (9:13 pm)

lani: she’s been unconscious for mad long 👎(9:14 pm)

nae: we should ditch this party n go to her place instead i’m BOREDDD (9:16 pm) nae: and what if bro’s dead (9:16 pm)

jana: girl (9:20 pm) jana: she ain’t dead 🤦‍♀️ please. (9:21 pm)

sasha: ofc not (9:23 pm) sasha: nae's right.. this party lowk boring asf🧍‍♀️ can we leave soon? (9:25 pm)

jana: yes 💋 (9:25 pm)

nae: thought you’d never ask. (9:26 pm)

10:57pm

you: y’all i’m up damn! 😭 (10:57 pm) you: is it really that boring? miles seems to be having fun (10:57 pm)

nae: he buggin then cuz it's been like two hours and this party is STILL boring as shit (11:01 pm) nae: i tried to give it the benefit of the doubt but nvm. (11:01 pm) nae: my niece's fourth birthday party was x100 more turnt than this (11:02 pm) nae: i’m stuffing all the good snacks in my purse nd then we outta this bitch 🏃‍♀️ i’ll be in the car y’all (11:02 pm)

jana: bruh🧍‍♀️ (11:03 pm)

sasha: nae beloved, you already put hella snacks in the passenger seat (11:03 pm) nae: so? 🥱 (11:04 pm) sasha: you don’t need no more tf 😭😭 big backed hungry ass (11:04 pm)

you: yes she does (11:10 pm) you: she’s thinking of me, duh (11:11 pm)

sasha: damn you right.. maybe 🤷‍♀️ (11:15 pm) sasha: or maybe she'll eat up all the snacks and i'll laugh in your face and say i told you so 🤌 (11:16 pm)

jana: uh huh... anw girl can we come over? (11:18 pm)

you: i’d say yes but miles is coming over soon (11:21 pm) you: y’all can come over first thing tmrw morning tho 💋💋(11:21 pm)

right as you sent that message, your phone began to ring and you were met with your own puzzled reflection on the screen of your phone. it was a facetime call from nae. you couldn’t come up with a reason why she’d ever need to facetime you from a party when she could text or call. nevertheless, you picked up. you forced yourself up and out of you warmth of your bed, throwing your comforter and many, many blankets off of you.

you answered the facetime call as you turned the knob to your bedroom door to leave, making your way downstairs to the kitchen so you could raid the pantry for food. when nae’s face popped up on your screen, you noticed that the interior of sasha’s car surrounded her, but neither sasha or lani were anywhere to be found.

“hey danae, what’s up?” you said into the phone as you shut the microwave. you'd settled on instant ramen since you were feeling lazy. when you caught a glimpse of your best friend's face on your phone screen a second time, you clocked that she looked worried and that made you worried too. it didn't help that she was dead silent. you raised an eyebrow. “you alone? where’s lani and sasha?"

“something happened,” nae spoke slowly, disregarding your question. her eyes were bolting back and forth between her phone camera and sasha’s car window.

“what?” you shook your head, your eyebrows furrowing in concern. you set your phone down on the counter, propping your elbows onto the surface while you tried to decipher nae's expression, but that got you nowhere.

“i’m gonna send you something. just hold on a sec.”

“nae, what’s going on?” you inquired, a puzzled expression painting your face.

she didn’t reply. you pressed your lips into a thin line and closed your eyes in both confusion and frustration, strings of air passing through your nostrils. whatever nae was about to tell you was obviously nothing good. you didn't anticipate anything but the absolute worst. you opened your eyes again when your phone dinged. it was photo attachment from nae. you furrowed your brows blinked a few times before tapping it, pulling up you and your best friend's text thread. your entire body went limp when your brain registered the monstrosity on your screen. all you could do in the moment was stare in shock. it was a clear shot of miles and arielle at the party making out in some random bedroom upstairs. arielle who wouldn’t quit making moves on miles. miles who would shut down her pathetic attempts every time. arielle who’s always hated your guts without reason. miles who swore on everything that you were the only one he loved. 

it was all so ironic, truly. arielle was dressed as an angel, a sparkly halo hovering above her head as if she wasn’t concomitantly sinning—shamelessly home-wrecking. and you could see it now: the embodiment of your relationship, or the so-called home you and your boyfriend shared. in your mind, it was ablaze and you were curled up all alone inside of it. you were left to succumb to the searing flames, burning to nothing ash while all that you and miles share burned beside you. 

the boy would come home to the walls still burning and in the process of self-purging. he wouldn’t find you, rather the remnants of what used to be you. the ash would slip through his dirty, unfaithful fingers as they trembled in horror. he wouldn’t be able to live with himself. he’d desperately try to grasp you. he’d try to save you and scoop debris into his sweaty palms so he could salvage what was left of you. still, there was nothing. there wasn't a single thing in the universe that could aid the way you felt in that moment.

now, miles would have to mourn you, for he killed you. and he didn’t even know it yet.

your eyes were squeezed shut because they had to be deceiving you. you must not be fully awake yet. the medicine must be making you hallucinate. you were dreaming. you were a hundred percent dreaming. that wasn’t miles. 

how could that be miles?

“i was looking for lani and found… them instead,” nae muttered. “i don’t know if he saw me take the picture, or what. i left to tell you right after.”

you swallowed hard. though a million different thoughts were racing through your mind, none of them came to be verbal. you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything, because what do you even say when something like this happens? would anything you said be enough? would any quantity of words in any given order be able you place the way you felt? unlikely. highly.

your eyes continue you gape at the photo, even though the sight was making your stomach churn. you couldn’t look away. your eyes were fixed on miles' hands on arielle's hips, then her hands cupping his cheeks. nae was still on facetime explaining whatever it was she was explaining, but you weren’t listening. her words were static to your ears. there was a pit in your stomach and it was growing deeper and deeper, your wounded heart subsiding along with it. you set your phone face down on the kitchen counter and began to clutch your stomach. you swore you were going to convulse and vomit from how ill you felt.

“[name]!” nae snapped her fingers into the mic. “yo, you still with me? i’m coming over. i’m gonna call an uber right now.”

you blinked and shook your head, flipping your phone back over and taking a deep breath. you couldn’t just shut down, not now. you had something you needed to confront. someone.

“no,” you sniffled. 

you didn’t even notice the hot tears rolling down your cheeks. you quickly swiped them away with the sleeve of miles’ hoodie. the realization that it was his hoodie you had on made you freeze up again for a few seconds, and then you buried your face in the palms of your hands.

“what do you mean ‘no?’” nae frowned, bringing the speaker up to her ear in case she heard you incorrectly.

your phone dinged three times. in your notification center were text messages from the devil himself.

miles: hey ma, i’m leaving now (11:25 pm) miles: the party was okay at first but it got boring (11:25 pm) miles: i’ll be there in like fifteen ❤️ (11:26 pm)

you just stared at the messages, biting your bottom lip until it began to draw blood as a plea for you to stop. the taste was metallic in your mouth, but your teeth didn’t budge. you didn't want miles over anymore, but it was far too late to tell him to turn around. it's not like he'd check his phone while he was driving, anyway.

“i keep losing you, girl."

you had forgotten all about nae for a second, her voice grounding you back to earth. you exhaled, your breath coming out unsteady. “miles is on his way over. after i talk to him, i’ll call you and you can come over then.”

“okay, babe,” nae nodded with a gentle sigh. 

“do… lani and sasha know?” “no, they don’t,” nae denied. “i wouldn’t tell them before you.” 

you pressed your lips together and silence engulfed your kitchen. you let your mind wander some more. after all this was over and done with, you'd have to explain to all of your loved ones that miles cheated on you. the very thought of having to tell everyone—your family, your friends, your dad—it embarrassed you. you couldn't stomach the very thought, so you exhaled deeply, opting to take it one step at a time. nae spoke again. “listen, if you don’t call or text me in, like, an hour, ima come over there.”

“okay," you nodded.

“remember that you deserve nothing but the best of the best. i love you so much, okay?”

“i know,” you tried to convene a smile. “i love you more.”

you hung up the phone and rid of any stray tears on your face. after nae's face vanished from your screen, you were left staring at you and your boyfriend's message thread. without putting much thought into it, you began to type.

‘cool, i’m jus—'

your fingers froze. you couldn’t text miles. he didn’t deserve anything so little as acknowledgment. you repeatedly hit backspace until the bar was blank and shut off your cell.

you sat idly on one of the kitchen stools behind the counter, your instant ramen long forgotten about. in the moment, you were feeling indifferent as a result of shock. still, you knew yourself better. when miles finally confessed his sins, you’d want to scream. you’d bombard him with a million questions at once, only to angrily invalidate any explanation that passed through his adulterous lips. you’d want to burn every handwritten love letter, every piece of clothing, and every gift, because they all meant nothing now.

he was a liar, and he knew it. if you could kill a man and face no consequences, miles might’ve been gone before he even walked through your door.

while you waited for him, you sat there and tortured yourself in thought. you couldn’t help it. was this planned? was this the first time? had he always thought of her like this? did he wish you were her when he was with you?

when you’d exhausted all of those questions, you began to think back to your own actions and behavior as you scrolled up on your texts with him. 

maybe i said something that upset him? but i think he would've told me... right..? or have i been distant? no, that’s not possible. we talk every day. is he bored of me? is that it? am i boring? none of these texts are showing signs of boredom, so what is it?

you'd soon resorted to flipping through the pages in your diary. you were really good about documenting your day-to-day life. if something happened with miles in the past that your brain wouldn’t let you dig up in the moment, surely you would’ve written it there. the pad of your index finger slid across the rough pages as your anguished eyes skimmed the entries. ten minutes in, you still couldn’t find a thing. you'd give anything for a straightforward answer, but you knew it wasn't going to come from miles himself.

when you heard a key grinding into the keyhole of the front door, you slammed your diary shut and jumped off of the stool, knocking it over in the process. you sprinted upstairs to your bedroom, shoving the journal under your pillow. as you trailed out of your room, you closed the door behind you and braced yourself for the worst. 

you shuffled back to the kitchen and picked up the stool from the floor, setting it upright. you caught a glimpse of miles unlacing his jordans at the front door. this was real. 

“hey. i thought you’d still be in bed,” miles grinned as he approached you, spreading his arms for a hug. he wasn’t in his costume, but in a red hoodie and black sweats. he must’ve gone home to change. his costume probably smelled like arielle’s designer strawberry-scented perfume, the one everyone compliments her on. she never shuts up about it.

“hi,” you whispered, accepting his hug in an attempt to seem normal. “i was, but i got hungry. how was the party?”

miles smelled like his favorite cologne, except the scent was unusually potent. it wasn't faded in the slightest like it normally was after he'd been out and around other people. the deplorable amount of effort he was making just to mask the truth infuriated you. it angered you even more that he clearly wasn't planning on telling you anything. if you hadn't seen it yourself, you might've never known.

“it was ight,” he shrugged, loosening his grip on you after a couple of seconds. you hated yourself for wanting to hug him for just a little while longer. he sure as hell didn’t deserve it, but for all you knew, that was the last time you’d be in his embrace. he let his hands fall down to your waist instead and it made you shiver on contact knowing he had his hands on arielle's waist not even a full hour ago. “would’ve been better with you there, y’know. you feelin’ okay now?"

“mostly, yeah,” you responded blandly, your throat tight and your voice fairly groggy. “still a bit tired.”

you didn’t know how to bring it up. this wasn't something you could beat around the bush about. you found yourself deep in thought. so deep to the point where you didn't notice that miles had started talking. you were busy staring off into space with half-lidded eyes, way past his gaze. he clocked it and moved his head so that your eyes were boring into his by force, his eyebrows lowering in concern.

“is everything okay?”

you cleared your throat and gently pushed his arms off your waist, stepping back as you began to blink back tears. there was no easing into it. standing there in front of miles pretending like everything was okay was already bad enough. it felt like you were twisting the knife that he plunged into your chest. eyes glossy, you swallowed hard and batted your lashes a few more times, desperately trying to rid of the tears that threatened to spill.

“i know you kissed arielle at the party,” you barely managed to speak the full sentence, your voice cracking when you spoke her name. “and i’m confused.”

miles’ eyebrows knitted to be one as if this news stunned him. you wished you could hear all his thoughts from start to finish after you spoke. you wanted to know whether he was planning to lie or tell the truth. would he gaslight you or admit to his wrongdoings? you wouldn’t find out now because you didn’t give him an option. this already hurt enough and it would end the same either way.

“nae told me. and she sent me pictures.”

silence fell between the two of you. it felt like it was eating you from the inside. the chirping of the crickets outside and the noise from the refrigerator running slightly compensated for it. not much.

“i just wanna know why you did it. and why her? why the girl that hates me with every last atom in her body?” you broke the silence, shrugging your shoulders. you were hugging your arms, rubbing them in an up-and-down motion as if you were cold.

miles was dumbfounded, guilt painting his features. he couldn’t meet your eyes anymore. you wondered what you would say if you were in his shoes, but it didn’t give you any insight because you knew you'd never do this to him, so you gave up. instead, you stared at the neat middle part in between his two signature braids that cascaded down the back of his head, down to his shoulders. you’d braided his hair only a couple days ago, back when nothing seemed impossible—nothing like now. 

though he wasn’t, miles’ hair still looked clean, freshly done even. what if arielle had redone his braids for him? she did say she was practicing, and she'd made it a goal to practice on him. you mentally cursed yourself for worrying about something as minuscule as miles' braids at a time like this. you didn't want to give yourself another reason to freak, but your brain wouldn’t let you rest. not even in silence. if miles wasn’t going to give you an answer, you’d send him on his way and come up with one by yourself.

“i don’t know why i did it,” he finally retorted.

“oh, word?” you laughed humorlessly. you were trying not to slap the hell out of his shamefully beautiful face. “it happened not even two hours ago. you know why you did it. your memory is sharp, it always has been, so tell me.”

miles exhaled, rubbing the palm of his hand on his forehead. “look, she came onto me while i was grabbing a soda. it was a heat-of-the-moment kind of thing! it didn’t mean any—“

“that’s what they all say, morales,” you cut him off with a scoff. “it didn’t mean anything but somehow you traveled from the kitchen downstairs to a spare bedroom upstairs so you could swap spit without anyone catching you?!” miles tried to speak, but you cut him off again. “were you even gonna tell me? because you came up in here acting like shit was sweet as if you weren’t just making out with the girl you swore i’d never have to worry about, meanwhile, i was home, sick! a fucking cold, miles!”

“i wasn’t gonna keep it to myself. i didn’t wanna hurt you,” miles said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “it wasn’t gonna happen again, i swear.”

none of the words miles spoke were convincing enough for you in the slightest, so you disregarded them.

“did i do something to you? are you holding a grudge about something and trying to get me back?!” you yelled, your voice trembling.

“no, it has nothing to do with you!” he hollered back, squeezing his eyes shut as if he was stressed out. he had no right.

“so then why the fuck would you go and do this shit?!” you were silent for a few seconds, chest heaving up and down while your heart beat out of your chest. your breath was sprinting away from you and you were trying to catch it. "it's bad enough that you kissed another girl, but arielle?"

miles pleaded, “it was a mistake.”

“damn right it was!” you narrowed your eyes to slits. “i can’t believe i trusted you, like, seriously. you’re sick.”

“i let you down, princessa, i know, i’m—“

“sorry?” you finished his sentence, folding your arms. you were far more angry than sad now. “miles, you weren’t sorry when you were kissing her. don’t be sorry now either. you were gonna kiss me with her bright pink lipgloss dried on your lips like it was nothing. you were gonna sit here and play me like i'm stupid. you were never gonna tell me!”

miles couldn’t counter that. he knew you were right, so it was back to uncomfortable silence apart from your hefty breathing and sniffles. miles had never seen you so angry. you'd never seen yourself so angry. there was no one else to blame but miles. you had no idea where to go from there. it was only after you asked the question that you were about to ask on impulse that you realized you should’ve wrapped this up many minutes before.

“is this the only time this has happened?”

miles was hesitant, his eyes growing wider. “yes!” he spat.

miles had a tell—not just his disinclination to answer your question the way he normally would, but also the way his eyebrows would position as if he wasn’t so sure himself. his teeth would clench behind his sealed lips, but you could tell because his jaw was tight and he swallowed hard, and he wouldn’t know what to do with his hands. 

you knew all of this about miles, yet you felt like you were gazing into the eyes of a stranger. 

this wasn’t the miles you fell in love with.

you muttered under your breath, “you know what? i’m wasting your time... and my own. you won’t have an answer that’s both truthful and something i wanna hear. we’re done, you and i. give me the key and get the hell out.”

“mami, come on—“

“nigga, deuces! i said leave!” you snapped as you backed away from him, holding your hand out.

miles dug deep in the right pocket of his black sweats, handing you the key. you flinched when your skin made contact with his. you didn't hesitate to trap the key in the palm of your hand, dropping your arm back down by your side. miles sighed to himself and trudged to the door to lace his shoes back up. you didn't even watch him leave, opting to turn around and battle the tears threatening to spill from your eyes instead. when you finally heard the front door shut, you rushed to lock it. you turned around and pressed your back to the door, face twisted in pure disbelief. 

this was real.

you slid down to the floor and pulled your knees to your chest, your cries echoing through your empty house. you’d never been more grateful that your father was gone for the weekend. miles wouldn’t have heard the end of it. at least now you had time to make up some lie to cover for miles' ass, and it'd be the last damn time.

not even five minutes passed before someone knocked on the front door three times and you sniffled. miles was going to drive you insane. “go the fuck away!”

“it’s me, baby,” a muffled voice said from outside, but it’s one you recognize, and it’s most definitely not miles.

you wiped your tears with the sleeve of miles’ hoodie and stood up, twisting the lock to open the door for your best friend. she was holding a box of pizza in her hand with a tote bag strap over her shoulder.

“you’re early,” you mumbled, one of your hands pressed against the rim of the door.

“i ubered home and got my car. when i got here, i just parked and waited,” nae pushed past you. you closed the door and locked it again, following her to the kitchen, where she set the box of pizza down on the countertop. “you wouldn’t have called me either way. i know you.”

she was right. you weren’t mad at her for being there though. she had always been so good to you.

nae walked over to the dining table and placed her tote bag in one of the chairs. “i brought your favorite type of pizza, and i stopped by the store to grab some snacks and soda. those are still in my car though, so—”

“i don’t think i can stomach anything right now,” you stated as you rubbed your arm. “i broke up with miles.”

saying that out loud felt weird. and final.

“oh, my love,” nae’s brows lowered and she shuffled over to you with open arms. she wrapped them around you and you did the same, sighing into her shoulder. you really didn't want to cry.

it hadn’t been long and you were already over feeling the way you did. you wanted to fast forward to the part where you got over miles for good. as an attempt to console you, nae was rubbing your back in a circular motion. 

“you did the right thing,” she spoke lowly.

you withdrew from the hug and slightly opened your mouth, fixing to ask nae a question only god knew how to answer. “why did he do it though?”

she led you to the couch in your living room and sat you down, massaging her thumb over yours in a back-and-forth motion as your hand stayed clasped in hers. you stared down at your lap, sniffling every couple of seconds and swiping away stray tears.

“boys are just greedy, babe,” she shook her head. “so very greedy. they want it all. there are so many different reasons why people cheat. it’s difficult to pinpoint just one. my random guess is that… miles has issues?"

“issues?” 

“mm-hmm,” she hummed. “internally. maybe he's insecure about himself, i don't know. whatever it is, it doesn’t justify infidelity. you were more than enough, it was him who was lacking."

“i don't get it. i mean, none of this makes any sense… unless i'm blind or stupid, it came out of nowhere. literal thin air. and when i asked, he said he didn't know why he kissed her,” you muttered.

nae sighed. “even if he isn't lying, he still did it.”

“i know,” you nodded. “and i'm sure it wasn't the first time. that’s why i left him.”

“and i’m so proud of you for that,” nae gave your hand a tight squeeze. “walking away isn’t easy for anyone. it takes forever for some people, but you did it just like that.” 

“yeah, well, i kinda had to. it’s bad enough that arielle is gonna rub it in my face until we graduate, and even after that, she’ll probably find a way to .”

“there won’t be any of that,” nae promised. “miles isn’t going to take her seriously—if he even takes her at all. he lost you because of what he did with that bitch. he won’t even be able to look at her without feeling guilty.”

“she can have him, i don’t care either way,” you scoffed. that was a lie. you did care. you cared more than you’d let on if you ever even admit it.

“yeah, you do,” nae raised an eyebrow as if she had effortlessly read your mind. “let yourself feel. it’s how you’ll heal.”

“oh, i’m feeling alright. i’m weighing the pros and cons of murder,” you shakily exhaled, balling up your fists and closing your eyes. “i can’t believe this nigga. seriously.” 

“i’d help you, but i’m not going to jail for him and neither are you.”

you let out a soft sigh, your gaze now fixed on your lap. the tears welling up in your eyes were beginning to cloud your vision. how someone could throw away so many years of loving one another so easily was so far beyond you.

“nae, i’ve been with miles for so long. he’s always been there—i don’t know how to be without him. he’s why i gave love a chance after swearing not to... now he’s shattered my perception of it. the worst part is i should hate him, but i don't. somehow, i still love him and—”

“hey,” nae cut you off. “that’s normal. how you feel is normal.”

you sniffled. “is it?"

“pshh, girl, yeah,” nae assured you, flicking out her wrist. “listen, breakups are terrible. you’re gonna cry and scream. you’re gonna wish you never met him. you’re going to go through old texts, swipe through old photos, and mope in his hoodies. all of that is okay. the worst thing you could ever do to yourself is force yourself not to feel,” nae paused. “if this is who he really is, then it's not your loss. i know it doesn't feel like that right now, but trust me... it just takes time. i don't know how long, but i know my best friend, so no matter how long it takes, you’ll be better than good without miles. i promise." "i'm still gonna miss him," you muttered, sniffling and drying your tears as they fell. nae wrapped her arm around you and exhaled. you sobbed into her shoulder, releasing all the pent-up frustration you'd been concealing in the name of keeping your cool. you'd never felt so inconsolable in your life. "i know, babe. i know."

❤︎₊ ⊹

it was late. 3:28am. time had never moved so slowly. you were genuinely considering calling 911 and telling them you were suffering from a heart attack. you were thoroughly convinced that this was damn near the same exact thing.

the moon wasn’t full tonight, but a waning crescent. it reflected you and how soulless and dejected you felt. the moonshine bleeding through your curtains was also the only source of light you would tolerate, the rest of your bedroom completely dark. you lay on your side facing the window, allowing the icy gusts of wind to hit your face. you were practically drowning in a sea of blankets all while still being in miles’ black hoodie.

nae was gone. she’d left about two hours ago, but not before suffocating you in countless hugs and forcing you to eat a slice of pizza and drink two glasses of water, despite your not wanting to ingest anything due to your unwavering nausea. you told her you’d be okay alone. you knew you wouldn’t and so did she, but you wanted to be alone, so she gave you your space and promised to check in on you when the sun rose. you loved nae dearly and you'd never take her for granted. you felt lucky to have such a kindhearted best friend.

you'd been in a 1v1 with your thoughts for a while now. your phone was powered off and shut away in one of your nightstand drawers to help resist urges. you hated that you wanted to call miles, but you did. you wanted to scream at him. belittle him until you just couldn’t anymore. and you wanted him to sit there and watch you do it without protest. you wanted him to be honest and tell you the truth. you wanted him to promise it would never happen again, and then you wanted to curl up under the covers of your bed with him and sob in his arms while he planted kisses on your forehead, apologizing profusely. you wanted him to tell you he loved you until you believed it again.

you couldn’t do any of that—you wouldn’t. it’d mean you have no respect for yourself. it felt like you hardly had any now, so you needed to keep the scarce amount that remained.

your thoughts were blank and sporadic all at once. you’d never been through a breakup, but you had a rough idea of how these things go, so you spent some time mapping it out in your head.

you'd eventually have to meet up to exchange one another's belongings. maybe rio would apologize on miles’ behalf and say she’d always love you. she’d call you a couple times a week. the calls would eventually come slower and grow more infrequent. soon, the calls wouldn’t come at all. even if there was the acknowledgment that rio’s arms were always open for you, they’d still feel closed. you'd treat them as such.

you'd barely eat because you couldn't stomach a single thing. you'd rot in your bed and binge all your favorite movies and shows. you'd go to war with the urge to run back to miles. you'd read old diary entries where you were gushing about how much you loved him and how amazing he was to you. you'd look back at old photos and videos. you'd reread old texts until you were sobbing so hard that you couldn't breathe.

you'd write letters that nobody was ever going to see and all the tears you shed would smudge the black ink and ruin your fancy penmanship. you'd lie to your dad and tell him that your relationship had just run its course and that you and miles needed to work on yourselves. your friends would check in on you, and of course, you'd tell them that you were okay every time, even if that was the furthest from that.

word gets around fast. when this dreadful weekend was over and monday crept up on you, you'd have to return to school and deal with the piercing stares and shameless gossip. you weren't ready for any of it, because now, everyone at school would know you as the girl who got cheated on by her long-term boyfriend for arielle. rumors would spread. words would be twisted and lies would be told, both about you and miles. in retrospect, it was all the more embarrassing for miles, but you still felt utterly humiliated. not to mention that you had no doubt in your mind that arielle was ready to run to his defense, preferably by kicking you when you're down.

sometimes, just for a fleeting moment, you'd forget about it all and your mind would go quiet. your heart wouldn't swell in longing and you wouldn't feel sick to your stomach. it never did last long before the same thoughts you desperately wanted to leave you alone started to pester you again. "but you two seemed so in love!" nosy girls at your school masking their prying motives behind what they thought were "supportive words" would soon tell you. the worst part is that you'd never know how to respond, because you thought you and miles were in love too. he was your sun and you were his moon. how could you so quickly forget that the sun didn't need the moon to shine, it was the other way around? you thought it was and always would be your heart tethered to his, but now you were left with a broken chain and a heartache.

you thought things would be different with miles. you truly did. now you knew that anyone could screw you over even if they crossed their heart. there weren't any exceptions, not anymore. miles proved that you can do everything right and still get done wrong. it wasn't fair. you should've known you weren't exempt from something like this happening, yet you still let yourself believe you were. maybe you jinxed it, or maybe you thought your case was special. maybe you thought this would never happen because you believed you were special. you only did because he made you feel that way.

you were sick and tired of brooding over your misfortune. you rolled onto your back with a frustrated groan and gaped at your ceiling, the cold air from outside still blowing against the side of your face. as exhausted as you were, sleep just wouldn't grant you sanction in its assuaging embrace.

what hurt the most is that you were so sure that you'd bagged a kind of love that was for the books. the kind of love you thought you could only dream about. though you weren't searching for him, the stars sent you miles morales. in your eyes, he was perfect. you loved and adored him, and swore he was your soulmate, made just for you. he was godsent and you never wanted to let him go, until tonight, when you learned that you were never the one who needed to hold on to begin with.

you came to the humbling conclusion that maybe the reason people told tales of faultless love was because real love was far too sickening to bear. it was merely a way to cope. nothing more, nothing less. maybe "happily ever after" had been a hoax all along. all the fairytales you had read growing up always began with “once upon a time”, but your story with miles ended with it, because loving him was easy—once upon a time.

maliland ©

#☆ namy fic recs #☆ namy fic recommendations #☆ namy recs

[spid3namy]

𖤐 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐋𝐄𝐑𝐁𝐘𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐂𝐒 𖤐

bc I love them n they just make sense idk 😣

☆ one time they had a snowball fight and he’s SO competitive so he couldn’t even let her win, but she has amazing aim for like no reason so she did end up winning anyway

☆ he’s not super big on pda, maybe like a arm draped around her shoulders or like holding hands

☆ one time she asked mama rio to help her learn Spanish for him but she CANNOT roll her R’s for the life of her she still tries though

☆ she likes cherry flavored lip gloss so when they kiss he literally eats ts off of her

☆ he smells like cocoa butter and she smells like lavender

☆ Rio let’s her come over bc she trust Miles so YOU KNOWWWWW she’s always over there she just can’t stay when it stars getting dark

☆ she LOVES pandas SO MUCHH so he buys stuffed animals of them

☆ she made a playlist for him for when he overthinks about his prowler stuff or jus stressed in general

☆ she likes giving him little nose kisses bc she finds the way he scrunches up his nose so adorable

srry it wasn’t a lot I’m so bad at thinking of scenarios without any inspo 😋

#☆ namy recs #☆ namy hc recs #☆ namy hc recommendations #this is actually so cute

[spid3namy]

HEAVEN 'N HELL - OPHELIA

if i die, please, let them find me.

angel(s): gwen stacy & fem reader includes: angst, flashbacks, & themes of depression chapter synopsis: you wasted away the summer ignoring your feelings, gwen unable to escape hers. wc: 4.5k

divider

heaven 'n hell m.list

august 2023

you felt as though you were melting into your mattress as you lay in your bed on your stomach idly. soon enough, you would be nothing but a puddle of liquid that your sheets and your covers were forcefully drenched in. you had tried so incredibly hard not to mull over the loss of your ex-girlfriend, and for some time, you didn’t do so at all. 

for the first few weeks of the summer, you dismissed the aching feeling in your chest entirely and feigned stability, carrying out your habitual summertime regimen. you went on nightly strolls when the moon was shining a little too bright for you to fall under. when it wasn’t too hot out, you’d venture to the lake and journal thoughts that didn’t involve her. it was therapeutic the way your pen glided across the sheets of paper with ease, and you found solace in the green grass beneath your fingers, coupled with the way the sun kissed your delicate skin. you dove even deeper into the artistry of baking, discovering new recipes and modifying older ones. your method seemed to be working efficiently, because by the end of each and every day, you were far too worn out to give anything else so little as half of a thought.

no matter what, you refused to confront your feelings. what you didn’t yet realize was that pretending like your feelings didn’t exist wasn’t going to stop them from eating you from the inside out whether you liked it or not.

that’s exactly what they did. your efforts had essentially gone to waste. 

one night, something in you just snapped. you could only ignore the tugs at your heartstrings until they turned into painful yanks. you couldn’t stand to bury your hurt anymore, so you dug it up. the oppressive ache of losing both of your best friends in such a short time period plagued your being from then on. you felt dead.

being locked away in your bedroom made you lose track of time. days turned into weeks and weeks turned into the entire summer. you had unfortunately succumbed to the desolation and the seclusion that your body had been begging to enervate you with, and the gelidity that had been nipping at your soul had overpowered your suffocating routine and broken you.

were just there and residing inside of you, the only escape being the tears that spilled from your eyes not intermittently, but only when you let yourself think about gwen too much in one day.

you didn't grieve how you should've. you’d willingly let sorrow consume you. it was who you were now.

summer break was coming to a close. the first day of your senior year was just a week away from the night jules came over to check in on you. she did these checks because your parents were usually on business trips, giving you the freedom to rot in bed without anyone’s knowledge. 

jules came sometime in the evening. she found you snuggled in your bed, blankets layered on top of your exhausted figure. your tv was playing a movie, but you weren’t paying attention, nor did you know what movie was on. you were facing the wall, staring blankly. you’d been doing so for some time. it’s not like it was on purpose.

“hey girl, i brought you some chinese food,” jules announced with a soft sigh. 

you heard a plastic bag crinkling in unison with jules’ footsteps. she set the plastic bag down on the surface of your desk, knowing you’d get up and eat when you were hungry. she briefly inspected your room and picked up a few items that she noticed were out of place. earlier on in the summer, you’d fallen into the habit of having an untidy room. you quickly fixed that when you realized it only made you feel worse about yourself, so now, your room was almost always spotless.

jules said, “you changed your curtains.”

“i did,” you confirmed monotonously. your old curtains were white, embroidered with baby blue floral designs. the new ones you had put up were light pink blackout curtains.

“they’re cute.” “thanks. and thanks for the food.”

you thought jules was simply making sure you were still breathing, dropping off food, and leaving, because that’s how these things usually went. instead, she sat near the foot of your bed, the cushiony mattress slowly shifting under her. it urged you to roll over and sit up, a puzzled expression painted on your face as you stared at jules.

“school’s about to re-open,” she reminded you.

“i’m very aware,” you nodded, releasing an exasperated sigh. 

she nodded slowly, squinting her eyes at you slightly. “right, so… have you packed? done any school shopping?”

“no…” you shook your head.

“you do know when your orientation is, right?”

you tapped your chin repeatedly for a few moments as if the answer was stored in a file deep inside your brain, and you needed to retrieve it before offering up a response “…yeah, no.” 

“it’s tomorrow!” jules exclaimed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

you flopped back down onto your mattress, clearly uninterested. “i can just skip this one. they talk about the same shit every time. it’s really not worth it.”

“it’s mandatory,” jules added. like it would change your mind.

“mandatory, my ass,” you rolled your eyes, yanking your blanket back over you. “how do you even know about this?”

“someone’s gotta keep up. you won’t. i know you better.” 

you didn’t give her a reply, in lieu turning over on your back so you could fix your eyes on the ceiling.

jules exhaled your name, her eyebrows now furrowed in concern. “i’m leaving in two days to go back to houston. i won’t be able to check in like this anymore…” she laid down next to you, joining you in your staring contest with the overhead of your bedroom. “i need you to start taking better care of yourself. no more staying inside twenty-four-seven. you’re gonna go on walks and–”

“walks?” you cut in with a scoff. "seriously?”

“you used to love walks!”

“i liked going on them with gwen.”

you grimaced deeply as soon as you said her name. it left a bad taste in your mouth, but it was true. back when you were dating, you and gwen would regularly go on late-night walks together when sleep wouldn’t have either of you. it was something you two had been doing ever since you were kids, so it stuck with you when you got into a relationship, and even after you called it quits.

“look,” jules began. “i know you miss her, but this breakup is seriously becoming an obstacle. if you keep up like this, you’re gonna ruin your future. all i ask is that you make an effort–”

you planted the palms of your hands on the mattress and used them to arise from your spot, speaking over your cousin in a rather accusatory manner, “you think i’m not making an effort?” 

“you didn’t let me finish,” jules replied, her expression hardening. “all i ask is that you make an effort to try and do some of the things you used to. don’t rush things. that didn’t go well last time.”

you looked down at your lap, sinking your teeth into your bottom lip. you felt embarrassed at how defensive you got. you knew jules was right anyhow. she was only trying to help.

“you’ve worked so hard, from the moment you got into that school. it can’t be for nothing. don’t let it be.” 

you pressed your lips together and a puff of air shot out through your nose. jules was right–again. it was your senior year. you just needed to push through those ten months, no matter how harrowing they felt.

“i haven’t even finished packing,” you mumbled. the fact that you didn’t condemn the idea elicited a smile of hope on your older cousin’s face.

jules hopped off the bed, pulling on either of your arms so you were sitting up. “so we’ll pack. don’t worry, girl. you’re gonna have a great year, okay?”

you nodded, though you didn’t believe that in the slightest. “okay.”

you couldn’t subdue the doubt that you’d never be able to seal the deep puncture in your soul. maybe this was one of those wounds that time couldn’t heal.

the next day arrived faster than you wanted it to. you were pining for the familiar comfort of your bed, eager to escape senior orientation. you were sitting in a fold-up chair, your bottom growing numb from the hard, rough plastic. it’d been a prolonged thirty minutes of various staff explaining things such as college, scholarships, test scores, clubs, sports, community service, and dorms. you weren’t mentally present for the vast majority of it, rather exhausting your social media apps or contemplating ideas that weren’t relevant in the slightest.

out of curiosity, your eyes scanned the room for familiar faces. you weren’t met with anyone you recognized, but forgettable faces that would star as background characters in your future dreams.

you left a little bit before orientation officially concluded to get a head start on unpacking your suitcase. jules was already in your dorm, awaiting your arrival so she could help you unpack since she knew you’d been putting it off.

on your way to student housing, you passed by one of the larger gyms. you were greeted with a familiar warmth in your chest, then it tightened when you remembered. you halted immediately and took a few steps backward to peek inside. it was the gym you attended your first and only prom in—the prom peter died at.

it was like his soul and his energy still resided within–like he was haunting it. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

december 2022

you and gwen strolled into the faintly lit and thoroughly decorated gym alongside each other. the cooler lighting cast a gentle hue of purple over the both of you. the white spotlights whirling around the gym heavily illuminated the area as opposed to the ones that weren’t as harsh. a crescent moon hung gracefully from the ceiling above the stage on the other side of the gym, alternating between tinges of blue, pink, and purple. dangling from the ceiling and decorating the walls were strings of silver stars, exuding the illusion of a starry night.  

you liked your outfit. you had on a short, sparkly, fitted black dress with thin spaghetti straps. you wore black stockings over your legs and black heels on your feet. your earrings were simple but cute: sparkly moon studs. a silver necklace with a shiny star pendant hung around your neck, resting in between your two collarbones. the girl beside you wore a black, grunge leather jacket, with various pins decorating the collar over her pink high-low skirted dress. to accessorize, she wore a dark-colored choker around her neck, two pearl necklaces, and identical pearl earrings that matched the neckpieces. black belts decorated her hips, hanging loosely. she had told you she was going for a nineties kind of look and you thought she totally nailed it.

both you and the blonde wore matching pink rose corsages around your wrists. peter was going to have the other piece pinned to the jacket of his suit. since none of you had dates, you decided to go together as friends. you had yet to spot him though.

you and gwen walked further into the gym, wrapping up the conversation you’d been having on the way in. gwen’s bandmates all waved at you and gwen from one of the drink tables and you two waved back.

“you excited to play?” you asked gwen, gesturing to the instruments that were already set up on the stage. mj had pulled a few strings, and now her band was going to play near the end of the dance.

“excited, yeah. also a little nervous,” she admitted.

“don’t be, you’ll do great,” you slung your arm around her shoulders, flashing her a toothy grin. your eyes wandered the gym, searching for the last piece to your trio, but you couldn’t find him.

“hey, where’s peter?” gwen asked you.

“i was wondering the same…” you took your arm back and squinted into the distance, standing on your tip-toes and trying to see over the heads of other students. “i thought he was catching a ride with harry, but he should be here by now.”

“i don’t see harry either,” gwen groaned. “jesus christ, i hope they didn’t bail.”

you shook your head. “peter wouldn’t do that.” “yeah, you’re right,” gwen shook her head. “let’s split up. i’ll text you if i find him.” “cool, me too.”

you weaved through the crowds of people, muttering small “excuse me’s” and “sorry’s” as needed. despite your efforts, your eyes never came to land on the familiar lanky brunette with glasses. you turned on your heel, beginning to make your way to the opposite side of the gym. at the same time, you checked your phone. no text from gwen. you shoved your cell back in your purse and made your way to one of the drink tables, grabbing a can of your favorite soda and popping it open. your eyes continued to sweep the crowds in the gym as you leaned on the table, your quiet sigh drowned out by the loud music reverberating throughout the gym.

“lookin’ good,” a sonorous voice suddenly said from behind you, disconnecting you from your thoughts. 

your eyebrows lowered before you had even processed who the voice belonged to. you craned your neck to the left to see none other than ned leeds smirking at you, him and his stupid blonde mohawk. you couldn’t help but roll your eyes, then close them before exhaling.

ned continued, “way too good to hang with that nerd and his girlfriend.”

“excuse you,” gwen’s voice scoffed before you could rebut, leaving you confused as to where she even came from. “peter is not my boyfriend.”

“and your compliment was ass!” you added, the blonde’s fingers simultaneously wrapping around your free wrist.

ned looked like he was itching to fire back at you, but gwen was already pulling you away by your arm, her grip firm. she led you to an area that was less populated.

“g, i’d like to keep my circulation,” you said to her once you both had stopped, wiggling your arm around. “right, sorry,” she chuckled awkwardly, letting go of your wrist and clearing her throat. “i didn’t find peter.”

you rubbed your wrist and breathed out, “neither did i. didn’t see harry either.” “i did. he was with some girl, and told me that peter was going to find another way here.”

your eyebrows raised. “peter said that?”

“according to harry, yeah,” gwen pressed her lips together, folding her arms anxiously. “and may told me peter’s not home.”

“shit…” you muttered.

gwen’s eyes suddenly narrowed and her neck snapped so she was facing the opposite side of the gym. mere seconds later, the wall fell apart, screams erupting as debris fogged up the air around you. you pulled gwen towards one of the exits as what appeared to be an oversized green lizard stormed further into the gym, the impact shaking the ground and sending you straight for the floor. gwen caught you, helping you gain balance again before you both sprinted out of the gym.

“i gotta go! get out of here!" gwen directed.

“what?!” you yelled, having barely heard your best friend over all the chaos in the background. 

“trust me!"

she took off, disappearing into the debris as more and more students rushed out. what was she thinking? you were left conflicted. in the moment, you didn't trust her at all. how could you? as much as you wanted to go in there and talk some sense into her, you’d be a fool to run into that gym after her.

“gwen!”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

june 2023

“gwen!”

two gentle taps to gwen’s shoulder pulled her out of her head. 

“yo, death leopard,” a voice called out. “something wrong?”

gwen turned around to see her bandmate, mj standing behind her, arms folded over her chest. she looked half irritated and half annoyed. gwen cleared her throat, a shade of red sneaking up under her pale, freckled cheeks. she swallowed thickly and only then did it click that she was still at band practice, not prom.

she then spoke, “no, everything’s good.”

“cool, so could you maybe start playing the drums on three?”

“huh?” gwen glanced down at the drum set below her in confusion, then back at her friends.

“we counted off three different times, but your head was in space, star girl,” glory explained.

“could you even hear us?” betty inquired, a worrisome frown etched on her face.

not at all.

gwen had been deep in thought, the world surrounding her now irrelevant as the tragedy that transpired at prom replayed in her head like a broken record. the fatal blow gwen delivered to the lizard followed by the discovery that it was peter all along was stuck on loop. she didn’t mean to kill him—spider-woman never kills anyone. that’s not what the media and the press thought though, and sure as hell not what gwen’s father, the police chief thought, either. 

gwen recalled desperately throwing rocks and rubble off of her best friend, holding his face in her hands as her body went numb. his hair was shaggy and coated with dust from the foundation of the broken wall. his eyes were half-lidded, his brown irises appearing to have had the life sucked out of them.

“i just wanted to be special… like you, gwen.”  he had said. gwen didn’t know what he meant. she didn't think there was anything special about her. she felt like the most useless person on the planet, especially in that moment.

her job was twenty times harder now. for the rest of her life, she’d have to fight off supervillains while the cops were hot on her trail. for the rest of her life, she’d have to live with the guilt that she took her best friend’s life. she’d have to listen to her father complain about how spider-woman ruins lives. how she ruined may’s life, and his life–and hers. given the way gwen’s life was going, she wouldn’t argue him on it. she lost peter and she lost you. ever since, she felt as though she was living on autopilot, far too busy to have any time to grieve properly. to feel.

gwen couldn't talk to anyone. there wasn’t a single person she could confide in–except for you. the only issue was gwen didn’t just break up with you, she had severed you two’s connection entirely, giving you the impression that she wanted nothing to do with you.

gwen was unsure how to respond to the questions that still hung in the air, so she only stared further, her eyes darting between betty and glory, who both awaited her answer.

mj sighed. “are you sure you’re okay? it’s okay if you’re not, we all have our days.”

“yeah, i’m good. i just spaced out,” gwen insisted, though the girl before her was extremely unconvinced.

mj walked back to her mic, ripping it from the stand and unplugging the wire. “let’s just end early today. i think we all deserve a break, yeah?”

betty and glory nodded in unison. gwen stared at her lap in pure defeat. this was the second band practice that ended earlier than scheduled that week because her mind was somewhere else. she eventually packed up her drum set and migrated off stage to the second row of seats in the seating area. once betty and glory were gone, mj joined gwen, sitting in a seat to the left of her.

“look, we have a festival to play at in three weeks. that’s really not a lot of time,” mj furrowed her eyebrows. “but i’m more worried about you. what’s really going on?”

gwen never was one to open up. even if she wanted to, she couldn’t. she couldn’t tell anyone about the double life she took on, so nobody would ever be able to even begin to understand the grief that came with peter’s passing. you still tried. even though you were mourning peter too, you still managed to bring gwen’s walls down and held her hand gently, assuring her that what happened wasn't her fault. teaching her that she wasn’t a burden for feeling, because feeling was what made her human. it wasn’t a surprise that gwen built those walls again right after your breakup.

gwen couldn’t even give the redhead a proper response before two honks blared from outside, but they both know she would’ve dismissed it anyway. 

“that’s probably my dad,” gwen muttered, grabbing her tote back and slowly rising up from the chair. she pulled the tote over her shoulder and began to walk away, but she stopped and looked over her shoulder. “i’ll be better next rehearsal. promise.”

mj watched with worried eyes as gwen left. gwen held her breath until she was behind those double doors. 

mj knew there was something gwen wasn’t telling her.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

april 2023

it was a cool friday evening. the refreshing spring air that the month of april so kindly delivered blew against your soft skin. the sunset looked heavenly that day. the sky dyed with warmer colors as opposed to the usual blue, the contrast in the differing tinctures painting the clouds a salmony pink. you were walking to your girlfriend’s apartment with the intention of spending the night. you two had planned in advance, so it had been the only thing one your mind just about that entire week. even though you’d had an argument a couple of days prior, you wouldn’t say it was detrimental to your relationship.

that was until you arrived at her apartment.

it may sound fucked up, but the truth was that after peter’s death, when you found out that gwen was spider-woman, you didn’t think anything else could possibly come between you two, since the secrecy that came with gwen being a superhero had always been where your doubts had stemmed, though you didn’t know it at the time.

when you learned of gwen’s alter ego, you also learned to empathize with her. you understood if she missed a few movie nights. you didn’t snap at her if she left you high and dry at restaurants where you were supposed to be having dates at. you didn’t mind having to go on a couple of nightly strolls alone, and you didn’t get angry when she’d show up at your window with injuries, because none of it was out of the blue or suspicious anymore.

in retrospect, you hadn’t realized how chaotic your relationship was. you were far too busy being caught up in the highest highs to really stop and think about it. the lows practically descended as low as the bottom of an ocean floor, where no land was in sight from the surface of the water, and the memory of the highs was the only thing that helped you stay afloat.

albeit you and gwen hadn’t had a low in a while, your most recent argument had to do with her tendency to distance herself when she gets stressed or when things got difficult. you thought you two had worked through it, enforcing healthy communication like you agreed to. at the end of it all, the issue was resolved (temporarily, anyway.) you thought that meant progress. 

oh, how wrong you were.

you arrived at her complex and knocked on the door, pressing your lips together as you waited. a couple of seconds later, you heard the lock twist and the door opened. gwen was in one of her hoodies and black sweats, the back of her hair bunched into a pink claw clip while a few of the front pieces hung loosely. she looked disheveled, to say the least. tired.

“hey,” you spoke first.

gwen cleared her throat. “hi.”

you squinted at her as she maneuvered around the open door, shutting it behind her and clearing her throat. you stared at her in confusion while she stared at you in what you could only make out to be woe.

“is everything okay? can i come in?”

gwen opened her mouth to speak but then hesitated. her left thumb was making back-and-forth motions on her right one, an unspoken tell that she was stressed or nervous.

“gwen, i’m talking to you.”

she shook her head. “i know. sorry.”

“is something going on?” you reiterated.

“yeah, i forgot to call you,” she said, pushing a piece of her hair behind her ear.

“about?”

she exhaled. “we can’t do the sleepover today.”

your face morphed into one of confusion. “why not?”

there weren’t any villains terrorizing the city, otherwise you wouldn’t even be face to face with gwen. you hadn’t hung out with her one on one in about two weeks, so she’d had plenty of space and time to herself.

“i think i need some time to think about a few things,” she told you, her voice low.

you froze. you were at loss for words entirely. 

“okay… um…” your voice trailed off, searching through your scattered brain for something to respond with.

“you didn’t do anything, i promise,” gwen clarified as she hugged her arms, tugging at the fabric of her hoodie. “it’s me.”

“you wanna talk about it?” you offered.

“no,” gwen replied quicker and harsher than she meant to, causing your eyes to widen. “sorry—no. i just need some time to myself,” she corrected herself, her tone softer. “for a little longer than a while.”

“oh,” you retorted. “yeah, no, i understand.”

“thanks,” she coerced a smile, but it was weak.

you nodded and both of you stood in silence for a few moments before gwen turned on her heel, retreating back to the warmth of her apartment and leaving you alone on the other side of the door. she didn’t offer to walk you back home, or even hug you. you sighed in disappointment and began to walk back the way you came. you were heavily conflicted. apart from the fact that she had basically just told you she needed space indefinitely, all you could think about was how your interaction with gwen had felt stale, or unnatural. something felt different, although you couldn’t put your finger on it. gwen was without a doubt distancing herself again, you knew that, but it wasn’t the same as all the other times. there was some kind of uncertainty to it.

your thoughts were so loud.

was that a breakup? no. it couldn’t have been. she just said she needed space—but why from me?

your head was already pounding and it got worse the more you thought about the possibility, so you opted to let it go. just for a little while. you told yourself, it isn’t a breakup it’s just a break. 

that’s all it is.

©maliland

taglist: @spid3namy

#☆ namy fic recs #☆ namy fic recommendations #☆ namy recs

[spid3namy]

15

1610!Miles Morales x Latina!Reader

Summary:You turn 15 tonight but your boyfriend is more excited for your quince then you are Taglist:@mayearies @ariliriche @campv4mp

A/N: This is a little bit more for me since I usually see a lot of black reader, yes I can relate to it and love the writing I just wanted something for my culture

It was the day! You woke up to your family all surrounding you as you father blasted Las Mañanitas from his phone

You sat up and rubbed your eyes “Ya no pa, es muy temprano” (Not now daddy it’s to early) you said between giggles “Ándale mija despierta te” (come on daughter wake up) You sighed in defeat and got up and went downstairs

downstairs you ate and then went upstairs. There in your room was your boyfriend Miles, sitting in your windowsill holding flowers and smiling goofily

You laughed and hugged him “you didn’t have to” “Of course I did, it’s not every day my girlfriend turns 15” “you’re too sweet”

(mini timeskip because I have writers block😍😍)

It was about 4pm and you were in your dress complaining to your mom “Mami, I feel like this dress is a foot long!” “Ya calla te” your mom groaned as she did your makeup

when you were finished, all dolled up you walked out hearing everyone cheer was the best thing ever. Then you saw him, your boyfriend in a green suit. Her quickly ran up to you and hugged you “you look amazing “ he started to dance with you.

Best birthday ever..

#☆ namy recs #☆ namy fic recs #☆ namy fic recommendations

[spid3namy]

✧ 𝐔𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬 𖤐彡

✩ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 !! : pm and spiderbyte’s first kiss 🫶🏾

✩ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 !? : prowlerbyte (miles 42 x spiderbyte) fluff , kissing , Spanish it’s probably gonna be a lil incorrect

Miles wasn’t wasn’t the sweetest or nicest to most people. Of course, the guy wasn’t emotionless, but just more quiet and stoic than most. After his father passed, he slowly..disconnected himself from his social life. The actual enjoyable conversation started feeling like a chore to him. Long debates and conversations with his friends turned to short smiles or a simple head nod in the hallways. His social awkwardness increased as a result, only truly comfortable around his mom and uncle. That was until he met Margo.

She was just so…beautiful to him. The way she’d listen to all his little rants about why Batman was better than Superman, her chin resting on his shoulder and her big brown eyes staring up at him and taking in every word he was saying as they cuddled up together. He found her adorable when she went on about all the different video games she played, his cheeks resting comfortably in his palms as he listened contently. Every little kiss on the cheek she gave him he turned into complete mush of course he’d never tell her that tough, he wasn’t really good with what he called “sappy stuff”.

One humid night, as they sat up against a tree, pinkies intertwined with one another tightly as Margo told Miles about her day. Miles was listening attentively, giving occasional “mhms” as he just…stared at her. He did this so much that he practically had her face memorized.

“Querida” he whispered gently to her. He noticing overtime she had taken a liking to the nickname

“Hm?” She gave him a slight smile.

“You’re really pretty…” He smiled back, His tone was soft as his hand moving up to her cheek as his thumb ran across it softly.

She giggled slightly as she moved closer to him, Miles feeling his cheeks heat up.

“Thank you baby” Her eyes squinting as she smiled wider.

His gaze went up to the sky. The millions of pretty little diamonds shining bright.

“Y’know, you remind me of that one.” He said, pointing up at the one that shined the brightest.

“Shut up” she rolled her eyes playfull, feeling her face get hot.

He pointed her chin up at him and pressed his lips against hers gently.

The boy truly was whipped for her

ty @b1les for the idea 😋🫶🏾🫶🏾

I’m actually kinda proud of this, especially since we don’t know that much abt prowler miles and spiderbte’s personality ..

#☆ namy recs #☆ namy fic recommendations #☆ namy fic recs

[spid3namy]

PLAY FAIR!

now playing: xo by beyoncé

barbie(s): e-1610 miles & black fem reader

includes: fluff & fake ass friends

synopsis: your day starts off a bit rocky when you're confronted with conflict concerning your friendships. your boyfriend cheers you up by taking you to the fair!

wc: 8358 (not including the bonus)

credz: @/firefly-graphics

a/n: first fluff fic yayay!! i lied abt when i was dropping this sooo many times, mb.. there's a bonus to make up for it. i hope u guys enjoy this and read VERY slowly bc idk when i'm dropping a fic next 🚶‍♀️ idk what i was doing here lowkey… i h8 everything but the bonus. (i'm bias i like angst better) lmk what y’all think of this tho 💞 ((i proof read but there might be mistakes))

mothers were always thought to have an intuition when it came to their children—some sort of sixth sense. the science behind it? well, there is none. none that’s been proven, anyway. that doesn’t stop some mothers from swearing that their second sight was legit. your mom was one of them, constantly giving her unwarranted two cents about people in your life who seemed harmless to you.

you felt blessed to have the mother you did. she was your best friend and your biggest cheerleader. she brought you up to be the girl you are today. without her, you didn't know who you'd be. not having a huge group of friends to be around 24/7 didn't really bother you as much as it would have if you didn't have her.

you’ve never felt like you needed to hide anything from your mom, but you did keep your crush on miles a secret for a hot minute. you'd never liked someone the way you liked him. you were shocked to discover that he like you too. when miles was ready to make things official, you knew you couldn't hide him from your mom anymore, so you didn't. she met him one saturday morning over breakfast, and to your surprise, she liked him. you were shocked she didn’t have anything condemnatory to say about your boyfriend, not because there was anything wrong with miles, but because your mom is overprotective of you.

growing up, you hadn’t always been the most sociable kid. all of the friends you had now found you and so did miles. that being said, your mom worried that people would take advantage of your built-in hospitality and youf kind heart. she watched out for certain things when you'd describe your interactions with people, then told you to watch out as well. although her overprotectiveness could be irritating more often than not, your mom had definitely helped you avoid trouble here and there.

growing up meant change. you weren't the biggest fan of change because of the risk that came with it. you had always preferred to stick to what you know—until this year. your fourth and final year of high school had you wanting to break out of your shell. the same few friends wouldn’t be there to keep you company when you graduate and go to different colleges, or hold your hand for the rest of your life. neither would your beloved mother. you had to hold your own hand.

you weren't sure how you were going to make friends, and you were too ashamed to ask anyone how to do so. thankfully, you didn't have to do much, because the friends you made came to you.

it started with a group chat with the five girls you had calculus with this year: tiesha, taraji, yanira, and adana. tiesha had created the chain so you all could send homework answers and test reviews back and forth. math was never your strong suit, so cheating was really the only reason you were passing. brief conversations about homework and how much you all hated the class turned into full blown conversations about boys and tv shows. minor comments about something annoying that someone did in class turned into major gossip sessions. you couldn't remember the last time you went a whole day without talking to those girls, whether it was one text message or twenty.

your mom told you she was excited that you had expanded your circle, but you could tell by the way her smile had slightly faltered that she was indeed irresolute. you knew you’d never understand her intuitive claims unless you had children of your own, and even then, you’d still doubt the phenomenon’s validity. it was just your nature to question everything.

presently, you were at a food court in the mall, sitting by yourself at one of the tables. every now and then, you’d glance up from your phone and see a group of friends or a couple pass by you.

you were supposed to hang out with yanira, taraji, adana, and tiesha, but it was almost one and none of them had showed up to the spot in the mall where you agreed to meet. every call you made went straight to voicemail. frustrated, you opened instagram to see if any of the girls were active. you raised a brow when you noticed the multicolored spiral around yanira’s profile picture at the top of your dash where stories were located. you tapped it just to be confronted with a boomerang of yanira, tiesha, adana, and taraji posing in a dressing room mirror. your eyes bored into the screen for a few seconds before you swiped out of instagram, treachery bubbling in your stomach. you released an exasperated sigh.

your mom was right. once again.

you glanced at a nearby tv on one of the walls in the food court and saw a picture of spider-man. you read the captions as they glided across the bottom of the screen, the clip of the hero fighting off a villain playing simultaneously. the news reporter narrated the highlights of the brawl and another one followed up his narration by concluding that spider-man had once again saved the city.

you smiled to yourself like a proud mother, then you thought about miles, not spider-man. you hadn’t talked to your boyfriend since the night before. as if he could read your mind, your phone buzzed against the table and lit up.

3 text messages @ 12:42pm

miles: hey, pretty girl (12:42pm)  miles: i couldn’t text you this morning, i’m sorry (12:42pm)  miles: villain of the week decided to get up early today (12:42pm)

so did you, but for different reasons. reasons that no longer mattered. you didn't even know why you were still sitting in that food court. you should've been en route to the train station by now. you felt so damn stupid.

you: that’s okay (12:43pm)

miles: are you okay? (12:43pm) miles: yk i’d never purposely ignore you, right? (12:43pm)

you: yeah, i know (12:44pm) you: it’s not you (12:44pm)  you: i’m at the mall rn bc i was supposed to meet some friends here, but they never showed. nb wanted to answer the phone either (12:44pm) you: i checked instagram n it turns out they’re all here (12:45pm) you: just without me (12:45pm) you: sooo now i have to do the walk of shame back to the subway station (12:45pm)

miles: that’s so messed up, i’m really sorry (12:46pm)  miles: did anything happen with them before this? (12:46pm)

you: no (12:46pm)  you: i mean if it did then idk anything about it (12:47pm)  you: my ma warned me about those girls. i should’ve listened 🤦‍♀️ (12:47pm)

miles: i got an idea. are you free now? (12:47pm)

you: i am 🤨 (12:48pm)

miles: take the subway to mine (12:48pm)  miles: i have a surprise ❤️ (12:48pm)

you: i gtg grab smth from my place b4 that (12:49pm) you: but i’ll be there :) (12:49pm)

miles loved a message @ 12:50pm

you didn’t even realize the smile that had crept up on your face until it was almost ear to ear and a few seconds away from making your cheeks ache. you quickly stood up from your chair, the legs howling loudly as they scraped against the tile. you winced at the noise and picked the chair up to move it instead of pushing it in. afterwards, you began walking to the exit closest to the subway station. your pace slowed when you saw your “friends” in front of you. they hadn’t noticed you yet. you hoped they wouldn't. they were walking in a horizontal line, laughing and carrying bags on their arms from different stores. you thought it made them look like they belonged in mean girls, or some coming-of-age disney movie with a clique of popular girls who manage to be both unnecessarily cruel and loved by everyone for antsgonists.

when the group of teens finally spotted you, they briefly side-eyed one another before looking back at you, fake smiles gracing their lips almost immediately after.

did they think you were stupid, blind, or both?

“[name]!” adana called out to you when you were only a few feet apart. she dragged out the last part of your name too. you saw it for what it was: an obvious and weak effort to sound genuine. adana picked up her pace so she got to you faster than the other girls. “we thought you weren’t coming, girl!”

you remained tranquil, though you could see everyone else behind adana snickering and exchanging looks. your kept your face relatively blank, not wanting to show the girls before you even the slightest bit of chagrin. they’d get a kick out of it and your outburst would be the topic of their conversations for weeks to come. high school was truly exhausting.

“i mean, i got here at twelve like we agreed,” you shrugged. “i called you guys too. i guess your phones were off.”

“yeah, they were,” taraji chimed in, showing you the 'do not disturb' icon on her phone. you fought the urge to roll your eyes at her fraudulent tone.

you almost couldn’t believe that this was a real situation that you were somehow caught in the middle of. tiesha pouted, the friction between her lips causing her already-faded pink and brown lip combo to fade some more. you knew she was mocking you, but you only wanted to smile when you thought about the shiny gloss that was neatly slathered on your lips, much unlike hers.

“are you okay? have you been here by yourself this whole time?” tiesha interrogated. it felt more like instigating.

“i mean, yeah,” your eyes darted around nervously. lipgloss honestly wasn’t a big deal anyway, tiesha probably had more in her bag. your confidence boost was short-lived and had diminished. you were never the type to thrive off someone's disadvantage. either way, you could act. “but it didn’t really bother me ‘cause i was texting my boyfriend and we—”

“boyfriend?” adana laughed mockingly like it was unbelievable. like it was impossible. “i didn’t know you had a boyfriend.”

“what? i’ve told you guys this,” you frowned, your voice wavering to a degree.

you stared at the four girls with an eyebrow cocked up while they turned to each other and shook their heads, a few whispers floated in the air and into your ears. you had spoken about miles to these girls before, you were positive. he was never a secret, you just weren’t someone who posted online a lot. in fact, you only had instagram because your mom made you sign up. you’d never posted once. either way, it’s your relationship. you didn’t want everyone in your business, that’s where mess was rooted. that's how problems started.

what mess the unforeseen treatment you were receiving was rooted in? that was a mystery to you. you didn’t understand how the girls who were supposed to be your friends could switch up on you at the speed of light. there hadn’t been any fights or arguments between any of you—to your knowledge, at least.

you’ve always preached that there are two sides to every story, but you also preached communication. you all were cool last night while confirming today’s plans, now suddenly they know nothing about you?

nobody questioned you about miles. instead, yanira broke the silence that you’d spent lost in your thoughts, trying to make sense of the uncomfortable situation you were in with purely scraps. “well, good thing we found you now.” she pursed her lips afterwards, clearly stifling a laugh.

words couldn’t describe how stupid and naive you felt. they were trying to play you in your face and thought you were oblivious to it. you were starting to think so too. maybe they’d been playing in your face this entire time. maybe they’ve been acting for the duration of your friendship. maybe there were signs this entire time and you didn’t notice until now. maybe the idea of meeting new people thrilled you too much, and they took advantage of that when they realized it.

you weren’t lashing out over everything going on in the name of “staying calm.” you couldn’t grant anyone the satisfaction of knowing they struck a nerve, and bad. you were just as committed to keeping up with your act as they were to theirs, and nothing was going to make you let up.

“we were just about to grab some food,” tiesha added after yanira, smiling ever so innocently, as if she was oblivious to the treatment you were receiving. tiesha was the one you were the closest with, so that hurt. stung even.

“thanks, but i have other plans,” you faked a smile and made sure to look each one of your “friends” dead in each of their glowering, dull eyes.

adana’s face contorted in slight indignation. “how could you have plans? were you only gonna hang with us for an hour?”

“i was heading out before i ran into you guys,” you smiled and shrugged, checking the time on your phone. “gotta go now or i’ll miss the train. i’ll see you guys at school on monday.”

those insolent girls gave you the stink eye as deviated away. a few steps farther from fakery and you could already hear the whispers and the murmurs, even if the mall was loud. they sounded more like hisses the farther away you got, until they blended into the many, many sounds of your local mall. you were thankful to be free from that conversation—if you could even call it that.

your next chat oughta be a real one. though you hated it, confrontation was just around the corner.

❤︎₊ ⊹

“and then they acted like absolutely nothing was wrong… tiesha too!”

you were seated on one end of the couch in miles’ apartment, your legs crossed and resting on top of his thighs and a pillow between the arm of the couch and your back. miles hadn’t told you what the surprise was yet, and quite frankly, it had slipped your mind entirely. you were never good when it came to keeping your emotions in check. the fury boiling and seething inside you was so immense that you couldn’t give anything but what happened at the mall even half of a thought even if you wanted to. miles was steadily running his hand up and down the bottom half of one of your legs because he knew it’d help you calm you down. it was something he did by default while you were ranting, because when you were upset over something, you could go on for hours.

miles was a teen girl’s diary that could talk back. you had been on a twenty-minute tangent about what transpired at the mall, making sure to include even the most minor details that other people would view as futile. your boyfriend made sure you knew he was listening, nodding and making a few comments when you’d pause to catch your breath. most people would hate hearing someone complain for as long as you usually did, but miles didn't mind it. in fact, he enjoyed it. it wasn’t your anger that he savored, he just loved staring at your pretty face. you had miles in a trance forever and always. your beauty would forever captivate the boy and you were well aware. the difference between now and when you weren’t blowing smoke out of your ears was that miles could admire every feature without you teasing him for it, because you wanted him to pay attention. in any other instance, you loved pointing out how much he stares and making fun of him for it as if you’re not just as head over heels.

“i feel pathetic. i waited there for a goddamn hour. and you wanna know what the worst part about all of this is?” you exhaled, your irises peering directly into miles’.

even when you were upset, you could admire him. you were doing it in that moment. last time it was his eyes, now it was his hair. the sun rays looming from the unfolded blinds painted his afro a soft brown, singling out and defining numerous strands of those gorgeous spirals sprouting from his head. he was so perfect to you. you often had trouble believing you could call him yours.

“tell me,” miles retorted, slightly angling his head to the left.

“i wore a good outfit for nothing,” you whined, tipping your head back concurrently. “i just got this tracksuit! this is honestly ten times worse than wasting a good outfit on a boring day.”

you had on a black, velvet matching set from juicy couture. it was expensive and you were pissed to have had wasted your first wear on the day you found out your friends aren’t shit. miles remembered how excited you were to buy that outfit. you’d talked about saving the money for it for what felt like forever.

“you didn’t waste your outfit,” miles assured you, drawing confusion to your face almost immediately. “i still have a surprise, you know.”

“right,” your eyes lit up and you sat up straighter, disregarding your mood. “i was thinking about it on the subway and i have a few guesses.”

“i don’t think you’ll be able to guess this one, but you can try," he laughed lowly.

“cookies?” you started.

miles shook his head. “no.”

“a cat?”

“no, mami,” he laughed.

“ummm,” you tapped your chin like you were deep in thought. your dark-colored orbs traveled to the ceiling. “movie marathon night?”

“better.”

you snapped your fingers. “christmas movie marathon night."

“no movies,” miles clarified.

“beyoncé?”

“not beyoncé.”

“i can do your makeup?!”

“nope.”

“you got me,” you rolled your eyes and blew raspberries. “i give up. spill.”

“i know you wanted to go to the fair during the summer, but i didn’t take you because i knew you’d complain about the heat,” miles began. “now that it’s november, i figured it’d be the perfect time to go.”

“oh shit, for real?!” your eyes slightly widened as you swung your legs off of miles.

“i don’t see why i wouldn’t be,” he retorted. “we’ll take the train and walk the rest of the way.”

you jumped off of the couch in excitement and shuffled behind the piece of furniture to grab your purse. you glanced over at miles, who was now scrolling on his phone. you crept up on him from behind the couch and inched close to his ear.

“get up!” you demanded playfully, grabbing his shoulders. miles slightly flinched, and you burst into a fit of laughter at his reaction.

“okay, okay!” he stood up, rolling his eyes and smiling. “i was thinking we could wait a little bit before we went.”

“nope, no time to waste,” you insisted. you’d wasted enough of that with your “friends.”

your boyfriend told you about all of the abilities that he acquired when he became spider-man, one of them being his heightened senses. you used to expect them to go off whenever you were approaching him, or whenever you scared him, but they never did. when you inquired about it, miles told you that his senses were most likely there to protect him, therefore they’d only go off when they felt like someone or something posed a threat. he didn’t elaborate any further, but you got what you needed to out of it.

knowing that miles and his radioactive dna felt safe around you made you feel special.

❤︎₊ ⊹

you hadn't been to a fair since you were ten. you had gone with your cousins, your mom, and your aunt. back then, you weren't smart enough to know how to play any of the games correctly. you weren't tall enough to ride anything that looked cool to you, either. you despised always having to settle for the teacups and the carousel.

going back to the fair wasn't really a priority until that past summer. it just happened to be on the long list of things you wanted to do with miles.

the air outside was cool and crisp and the sun probably felt threatened by the clouds obstructing its view of the city with insomnia. you were relieved to not feel the sweltering heat beating down on you, especially since you had worn the sun’s favorite color in velvet. the leaves on the trees were turning orange now. you were entranced by one tree in particular, watching as the plant detached itself from the branch of the tree and danced in the wind on the way to the ground.

at the front gate, you held out your hand so one of the employees could give you a stamp, as did miles. the stamp was an orange leaf, but it didn't really show up on your darker-colored skin no matter how you squinted.

now that you were there, the fair was much more different than you pictured it to be. though you wanted to experience as much as you could, you had three main goals in mind:  1. win an unnecessarily oversized plush 2. take pictures in a photo booth 3. go on the ferris wheel

as long as you were able to say you did all of those things by the end of that night, you’d forget all the misfortune that the first half of the day bestowed upon you and forgive the universe for allowing it.

as you strolled the fair grounds with miles, you tried to catch a glimpse of everything there was to do as you passed. the fair was bustling with people. there were families, groups of friends, trios, duo. there were also couples, like you and miles. you even saw people by themselves every so often. your day could’ve ended like that, you were elated that you didn’t feel alone anymore, but you’d never say it out loud.

“whatcha wanna do first?” miles asked you. he was being just as observant as you, if not more.

you squinted your eyes ahead and a specific game caught your eye. “let’s play basketball, i’ll definitely whoop your ass this time.”

“big talk for someone who can barely even shoot baskets when we're on the court,” miles fired back. “whoever wins gets to choose what we do next.”

“fine by me,” you shrugged.

you two grabbed a single basketball from your lanes when you got over to the game. you saw miles adjust his grip on the ball from the corner of your eye. you reduced your eyes to slits in response and pressed your lips together.

when the bell rang and the timer began to count down, you both shot your balls into the baskets. both of them made it in. you were doing fine for the first couple of seconds, but then your balls began to veer away from your basket. you quickly glanced over at miles’ scoreboard to find that he was eight scores ahead of you. you furrowed your brows and began throwing balls into the goal again, making the first three shots and missing the last two. you were on autopilot from that moment on, throwing balls at your goal without stopping to celebrate nor gripe.

just as you reached down for a basketball to make another shot, the timer went off, indicating the end of the game. you looked up at your scoreboard to find that you’d only gotten twenty-eight shots. you could already feel miles’ eyes boring a hole through your head, patiently waiting on you to look over at his lane and accept defeat.

you gave in to defeat and scanned his final scoreboard: fifty-eight shots.

you finally looked over at the boy and he was smirking slyly. “yeah, so i’m tryna play the game with the water guns and the targets.”

you would’ve much preferred to find a photo booth next, but a deal was a deal, so you brushed off your loss. neither of you had a map, so you weren't sure where any of the games were. you two agreed to wing it, so you and miles roamed around for a while. you made small talk and miles teased you for being so confident that you'd win the last game.

finally, you came across the mini-game he wanted to play. your face lit up when you saw all the stuffed animals hanging from the rack above. you could get behind this.

the worker was on her phone, visibly nodding off until you two approached the game. you caught a glimpse of her rolling her eyes and shoving her phone in the back pocket of her black jeans. though she was clearly fed up by the presence of you and your boyfriend, she thoroughly explained the rules of the game. miles had to strike down moving targets with a water gun. the targets would move left to right, up and down, or both. he had to shoot all of them to win, and he only got five minutes to do so.

the worker hit the red button and miles was on the clock.

the targets were the typical kind: white circles with red circular stripes, and a red bullseye in the middle. you watched keenly as miles gripped the gun and squeezed one of his eyes shut for precision, pulling the trigger and shooting a line of water at two of the targets with ease. to his surprise, they began to move faster. he was still hitting them though.

the employee was paying miles no mind, already turned around and back on her phone, texting away. even though dealing with those targets was like breathing for miles, he decided to take a shortcut. just for fun.

while the worker wasn’t looking, miles handed you the water gun and used his web-shooters to swiftly shoot down the last five targets. your eyes enlarged at him in a panic and before you could really think about it, you sprayed the webbing off of the targets miles shot down with them.

the worker turned back around when she heard the winner’s bell ringing. by that time, the water gun was already back in miles' hand. the worker stared at the both of you in confusion. miles looked proud of himself. you nervously smiled and shrugged.

the worker rolled her eyes before they traveled over to the selection of toys and stuffed animals just above her. “pick a prize, any prize,” she said unenthusiastically.

“which one do you want, mama?” miles asked you.

“umm…” your voice trailed off. your eyes glossed over all the different plushies until one caught your eye. “stitch for sure.”

the worker nodded and unhooked the stuffed animal from the rack. she quickly handed it to miles and gave him a quick half-assed smile before resuming her bored expression. miles passed you the stuffed animal and you smiled brightly. you remembered this feeling, and you felt like a little kid all over again.

“he’s our son now,” you proudly declared.

“he’s too big for that,” miles teased you. “that’s a grown man.”

you gave miles a dirty look and punched him in the shoulder. “i won’t let you body shame our son.”

“my bad!” miles laughed and put his hands up in defense.

"yeah, whatever," you gave miles an eye roll and grimaced. you clocked the worker glaring at you two from the corner of your eye, so you grabbed miles' hand and hurriedly dragged him away from the booth. "we gotta go before she sees the pile of webs on the ground and has cps investigate us. she already hates us, what if she makes us return our son?”

"that's your main concern?" miles' eyes widened. "not the worker finding out i'm a superhero?"

“why would i be worried about that?" you inquired playfully. "i shouldn't have to lose my baby because you wanted to risk your identity."

you both laughed as you wandered along the paths of the fair aimlessly. neither of you knew what you where you were going next, but you were way too immersed in your debate to think about it. amidst your little parley, the sun finally escaped from the clouds' cover, the sky shifting to a warm orange and light shades of pink instead of the gray it had greeted you with.

“by the way, that was very much cheating,” you chuckled, thinking back to the mini-game. “you need to play fair next time. no web-shooters.”

“we had no opponents,” your boyfriend reminded you.

“the employee seemed like one,” you replied, thinking back to the looks she’d give you two. “i didn’t even know you had your shooters on you… anyway, that means stitch is an accident.” you frowned.

miles' nose wrinkled. “man, what?”

“i’m just chattin’,” you snickered.

“per usual,” miles shook his head, slinging his arm around your shoulder and shaking his head.

you two kept walking aimlessly for a little while, but you stopped dead in your tracks when you spotted a photo booth. you briefly made eye contact with miles before briskly snatching up his arm, pulling him as you sped over to the booth.

“the booth’s not gonna disappear, damn!” miles from behind you, panting with his hands on his knees as he tried to catch his breath.

“it could,” you shrugged, gesturing to the curtain with your free hand. “get in.”

“stitch won’t fit in there,” miles pointed out.

you frowned and observed your surroundings. you knew stitch was bound to get stolen if you left him outside unattended. you continued to glance around, trying to come up with a simple, but logical solution. your eyes stopped on an old lady sitting on a nearby bench by herself, flipping through a novel. she had on a white sweater with a black dress underneath, her long hair braided down and resting on her shoulder. you told miles to wait by the booth and approached the woman with a light-hearted smile on your face.

“hi, excuse me," you spoke softly in an attempt to make a good impression.

the lady looked up at you, half-surprised. she adjusted the position glasses with her index finger, gently pushing them up the bridge of her nose. “oh, yes?”

“may you please watch this for me while i take pictures with my boyfriend in that booth over there? i promise we won’t be long.”

you looked back at miles and pointed in his direction. though he was clearly confused, he smiled nervously and waved anyway. you turned back around to face the woman and smiled again.

“of course i will, dear,” the lady replied, a smile gracing her lips. she waved back at miles.

“thank you so much,” you smiled graciously, setting stitch next to her on the bench. you were ready to go back to miles when the woman stopped you by calling out. you whipped around, biding patiently in the same spot until she spoke.

“cherish the memories that you’re making. all of them.”

you didn’t exactly know what she meant, but then your last trip to the fair came to mind. it was so long ago, but you had almost forgotten how much fun you’d had, even if you couldn’t do much. you never wanted to make the mistake of taking memories for granted whilst you’re making them, because then you'd miss them too much when they were in the past, at least that's how you saw it. the future is uncertain. life is cruel. that day at the fair as a toddler could’ve been the first and the only time you ever went. today could be the second and the last. you hadn’t really thought about any of that before. you hadn’t thought about how precious your memories really were.

“and make them with the right people.”

you knew what that meant.

your eyes lowered, confusion evident on your face anyway. “how do i know if they’re the right people?”

“you’ll know. intuition is real. if something feels wrong or right, you'll know. listen to what your body is telling you, my dear,” the lady replied, crossing one leg over the other and opening her book back up.

your eyes widened slightly as you were still a tad bit lost, but you nodded. "okay. i will."

you jogged back to the photo booth, excitement coursing through your veins. miles didn’t bother questioning your tactics this time.

you both sat down in the photo booth and miles drew the curtain shut. he sat back and you tapped the screen, selecting two printouts so you could both keep one. before you even got the chance to retrieve your wallet from your purse, miles was sliding a couple dollars inside the machine. you hadn’t even noticed them in his hand before.

“today is my treat. you’re not paying for anything,” he told you.

“boo. i can’t spoil my man every now and then?” you clicked your tongue. “i’ll get you those comics you wanted instead.”

miles shook his head and chuckled. when the timer on the screen began to count down from ten, you fixed your braids and made sure your clothes looked presentable.

“i have ideas,” you announced to miles. you'd be envisioning this moment in your mind for ages. “just let me lead.”

“you the boss,” miles conceded in compliance.

“cool,” you giggled. you slid your hand under miles' chin and pulled him closer until your lips were pressed onto his cheek. you stayed in the same position with your eyes closed until you heard the first flash. the next photo was simple, a shot of you and miles kissing. the third one was the both of you looking at each other and laughing. it wasn’t planned, but miles had made a joke so you didn’t have time to pose any differently.

in the following ten seconds, you made miles your canvas, scattering kissing all over his face. he was confused until he looked at the screen to see all that your lips were imprinted on his face with colored lipgloss. he kissed his teeth but then laughed. your arms were wrapped around his shoulders, and that was the last photo. it was your favorite.

you waited for the photo strips to print and then left the booth. you immediately snapped your neck towards the bench to see your stitch plushy still sitting with the older lady. you sighed in relief and jogged over to her.

“thank you again!” you beamed, grabbing the stuffed animal.

you had a feeling she knew you were also thanking her for the unsolicited advice. you'd never understand how some older people were so good at reading others.

“you’re welcome, dear,” she waved goodbye and you waved back.

you wouldn’t forget what she told you.

you then went back to miles, expressing how happy you were that stitch wasn’t stolen. you went on and on about what a terrible mother you would’ve been, had you lost your child after not even twenty minutes of having him.

a few minutes later, miles caught you staring at some nearby concession stands. you didn’t eat anything before leaving his flat, but the line was a bit lengthy. you were silently trying to decide whether the wait would be worth it.

“you hungry?”

you nodded, settling for waiting in a long queue over an empty stomach. “starving."

❤︎₊ ⊹

it was getting late now. the sun was nowhere in sight and neither was the end of the night. the cool fall breeze felt nice against your soft skin. you wished that you could live in this part of the day for eternity, playfully bickering with miles as if you wouldn’t cling to him a few minutes later during the drop on a rollercoaster.

up to that point, you had gone on at least thirteen rides and played nine competitive mini-games. miles ended up winning most of them, despite him saying he’d go “easy on you.” you’d always respond to loss by saying you won in your heart, and he’d laugh at you. you’d pretend to be upset until you couldn’t fake it anymore and laughed along with him.

now, you and miles were sitting on grass, the synthetic kind. you two had shared a peculiarly long corn dog. you claimed that was enough for you, but miles ordered nachos too, and you shamelessly snatced up a sizable amount of them. food just tasted better when it wasn't yours.

after hours of being offline, you finally had a phone break. you sent your mom a text to check in with her before navigating to your email app. you scrolled through your recent until you came across the digital copies of the pictures you and miles took in the photo booth earlier sitting in your inbox. “i got the digital version of the photos. they're so cute!" you exclaimed.

miles grinned. “send ‘em to me later on."

“will do,” you agreed, looking back up to see him stood up from the ground with stitch in hand.

“i’ma rent out a locker to keep this guy inside of and then head to the bathroom,” he told you.

“okay, i’ll be here,” you nodded.

whenever you were out with anyone, you always thought it was common courtesy not to reply to texts that weren’t urgent. you never wanted to make anyone in your life feel like your focus wasn’t on them while you were spending time together. that being said, you hadn’t thoroughly gone through your notification center since you were at the mall. since miles was gone for a little, you thought it was a good time to deliver a few textbacks, because you knew that after tonight, you wouldn’t have any energy to do so until the next day.

you didn’t have any notifications from the calculus group chat, no surprise there. you had an older one from your mom from before you checked in, but she was just sending a tiktok. the next one down was tiesha and then adana. a pit formed in your stomach and you nervously chewed on the inside of your cheek. despite the uneasy feeling you had, you opened tiesha’s text first.

tiesha💞: [name] (5:46pm) tiesha💞: miles is your boyfriend?? (5:46pm)

‘not this again’ you thought.

you didn’t know what you were expecting the text to say, but it wasn’t that. this wasn’t a topic you wanted to circle back on, given everyone’s initial reactions. and you thought she knew—you thought everyone knew. maybe you weren’t as close with tiesha as you thought you were. or any of those girls.

you: yes... i’ve said this before (7:34pm)

you: literally with him rn. why? what’s the problem? (7:35pm)

your brows were knitted together as you anticipated a reply, your fingers drawing circles in midair just centimeters above the keyboard. you were biting the left side of your lip and your teeth were close to piercing the skin. tiesha's response came quick despite your late reply.

tiesha 💞: miles morales? the one i told you i like?? (7:36pm)

you read the text and had to do a double-take. your stomach dropped all over again. you had an exceptional memory. tiesha had never mentioned miles to you, like, ever. she hadn't mentioned any crush of hers to you at all. you just assumed she wasn't interested in dating.

you: i don’t remember you saying anything about like any miles.. but yeah he’s my boyfriend. (7:36pm) you: he has been for months now. i told y’all this, so idk why you were acting all confused @ the mall. (7:37pm)

tiesha 💞: if we knew then why would we be acting confused? 😐 (7:37pm)

you narrowed your eyes at the screen. you could tell her tone was meant to be harsh.

you: i don’t know, tiesha. (7:38pm) you: maybe for the same reason y’all were acting confused when you found me by myself at the spot that we agreed to meet at tday?? 🤦‍♀️ (7:38pm)

tiesha 💞: we said you could come hang w us (7:39pm) tiesha 💞: you’re the one who left (7:39pm)

you released an exasperated sigh as you read her response. you thought back to what the lady who watched stitch for you told you earlier. you couldn’t stick around these girls for any longer. they weren’t the people you wanted to make memories with. perhaps they were nothing more than a much needed lesson. you partially learned how to socialize, but you also needed to learn how to stand up for yourself. you were growing up. nobody else was going to do it for you.

you: i left bc you guys were acting weird towards me (7:40pm) you: idk what the deal is, but if there’s a problem you need to be straight up about it. (7:40pm) you: we all agreed to meet at the food court, but i opened ig to see y’all posing in a mirror while i’m sitting alone. why’d you even invite me atp?? (7:40pm)

tiesha 💞: i thought adana was lying when she said you got with miles, behind my back but ig she was right. (7:40pm) tiesha 💞: you weird af for that. you know i like him (7:41pm)

you: fym bro.. ??? 😭 i literally did not (7:41pm) you: and either way, he’s BEEN my boyfriend (7:42pm)

tiesha 💞: yk you only got w him to tick me off 🖕 (7:42pm)

you: ok wtv. (7:44pm) you: you guys showed me what kind of people you really are, so best believe i’m not sticking around anyway. you can tell that to eb else.(7:45pm) you: and i don't know what you thought you were doing. miles has been MY boyfriend for almost over a year now. he’ll continue to be my boyfriend for years to come, thanks. (7:47pm)

you didn't hesitate to leave the group chat and block those girls everywhere. they didn’t get to have access to you anymore. it felt like weight was lifted off your shoulders and you silently celebrated in your head. you were still in public and didn’t want to draw attention to you because you were cheering about cutting people off. at least you were free from the burden, even if you had a few less friends now.

“ready to go to the ferris wheel?”

you glanced up from your phone to see miles towering over you, both of hands in the pockets of his green puffer. you smiled big. this was the last thing on your checklist, and the thing you’d been looking forward to since you set foot on fair grounds.

“duh,” you giggled, reaching your arm out so miles could pull you up. after he did, you brushed off your outfit and cleared your throat. “so, do we know which way it is?”

“nope,” miles answered. “we’ll just start walking and hope we come across a map, or something.”

you raised and eyebrow and smirked. “so like we’ve been doing this whole time?”

“like we’ve been doing this whole time,” he echoed.

“i guess it makes it more adventurous,” you decided as you two began to walk away from the grass. you clasped your hand with his. “plus, i can tell you what happened with tiesha while you were in the bathroom while we look for it.”

miles’ eyebrows elevated. “something happened?”

“yep,” you shake your head in annoyance. “tiesha had a crush on you or something. apparently, she didn’t know we were together, so she thinks i got with you just to spite her.”

“how wouldn’t she know?”

“that’s what gets me!” you pointed your index at miles’ chest and tilted your head back in irritation. “i told her and the other three, so i don’t know why they were acting clueless! plus, she swears up and down i knew she liked you. that girl never said a word.”

“from everything you’ve told me today… it sounds like they just don’t like you,” he frowned, speaking in a way that told you he was trying not to hurt your feelings.

“they don’t,” you sighed, tilting your head up slightly. “that’s why we’re not friends anymore. i told tiesha to tell everyone else we won't be talking anymore.”

"really? are you okay?"

you reluctantly nodded. "yeah, i think i'm okay." you were telling the truth. in the moment, you were okay. maybe it'd bother you later, but all that mattered was that it wasn't bothering you now.

miles’ expression softened in relief. “that’s good. i’m glad you’re learning not to take b.s.”

you covered your mouth and snickered when you heard "b.s." for whatever reason, you thought it was humourous coming out of miles' mouth.

“no, really,” miles insisted anyway. “i’m proud of you.”

you didn’t ask for confirmation because you believed him even if you found the delivery funny. “thank you, miles.”

he smiled and pulled you closer, planting a kiss on your forehead. you grinned and pressed your ear against his arm. you made sure to take in and appreciate each and every step you took forward with your lovely boyfriend. you were cherishing a memory that wasn’t one yet, but tonight felt far too special not to. you absorbed everything to the scenery and the moonlight to the warmth that clinging to miles' arm gave you.

as if it was looking for you two and not the other way around, you and miles found your way to the ferris wheel without even having to seek out direction. surprisingly, the queue wasn’t at all demanding. when you got closer to the front of the line, you thought of something. you needed something to remember your favorite memory by, anyway.

“we should take a picture in front of the wheel,” you suggested to your boyfriend. “we can ask someone to do it for us.”

“bet,” miles pulled his phone out of his back pocket of his jeans.

he turned around and kindly asked a random girl standing in line behind you two if she could take the photo for you. she thankfully agreed and miles swiped to the camera app and handed her his cell. you two backed up a bit and the girl told you where to stand so that the photo would look better. you took a few pictures standing in front of the wheel side by side, miles’ arm around your shoulders. you two were hugging in one of the shots and he was kissing your forehead in the other.

after those pictures, you took miles’ arm and made him face a different direction. now your shoulders were to the camera lens and the ferris wheel. you snaked your arms around his neck and he instinctively placed his arms around your waist. this was one of your favorite poses, miles knew what to do by now.

you glanced down at your feet and took a step closer to miles so the distance you two wouldn’t look awkward. you lifted your head back up to meet his gaze. the boy was looking at you and you could’ve sworn you saw hearts forming in his eyes. he wasn’t just looking at you, he was admiring you. there was a difference, and you could tell.

but it’s not like you weren’t doing the same.

you whispered loud enough for only miles to hear. “i love you."

“i love you more."

you shifted onto your toes and miles slightly leaned down to reach you. your lips connected effortlessly, your eyes fluttering closed in unison. the ferris wheel lights glimmered behind you two as miles deepened the kiss. you mindlessly lifted your hands to his cheek, your thumbs gently caressing his soft, warm skin.

“got it!” the girl taking the photo called out.

you and miles slowly withdrew your bodies apart and she approached you two, handing miles the phone. you both thanked the girl and got back in line. your gaze was fixed on the structure above you. all you could think about was how pretty the sky was bound look from all the way up there.

you excitedly entered the cabin when it was finally you and miles’ turn. the designated employee shut the door and your eyes immediately glued themselves to the window. you were just barely going up, and you already had a better view of the fair and all of the lights.

“you seeing this, miles?” you questioned without even daring to rip your eyes away from the window.

“i am,” he smiled. your reaction to the view made him happier than any angle of the world around him ever could.

as you ascended higher up, you focused more on what was above ground rather than on it. the luminous stars painted the night sky like white spatters of paint would paint a black canvas. they glittered brightly above you while the ferris wheel slowly spun.

you turned your head back to miles to smile at him, but he beat you to it. you felt like the luckiest girl alive. you were thankful to have at least one person who was true to you. that alone was more than enough. 

miles was more than enough.

the moonshine illuminated your beguiling features as you admired its fullness and its beauty. your head was rested on miles’ shoulder and his arm was sitting around your waist, the other one holding your hand in his lap. you knew you’d look back on this and recall that you never took this day or the feeling that came with it for granted, not once.

this felt so right—you didn’t know how to explain it. tonight was perfect and you would never change a thing. everything was how it should be. you were where you should be, you could feel it. this felt right in your soul.

maybe this was it. maybe this is what everyone was talking about.

maybe intuition is real.

❤︎₊ ⊹ bonus:

you and miles had concluded your fair date and were back at his place. you were going to stay for a while before returning to your own. your head was on his shoulder and your legs were curled up in the opposite direction. his hand was evolved in yours, as yours was in his. miles' mom was home and you definitely didn't want to give her the wrong idea by appearing exceedingly handsy.

“i had fun,” you gloated on the day you'd just had as miles browsed through netflix on the tv.

“are you sure? you seemed pretty over it when i beat you at basketball.”

you tongue clicked. "very funny, morales." you thought for a moment. “and thanks for taking me out, by the way. i know you were probably tired from having to fight all morning,” you exhaled.

“it’s no problem,” miles insisted, though you could tell he looked tired. “tomorrow’s sunday, i’ll get some sleep then.”

you both turned your heads when you heard the sound of a door being opened echoed through the hallway followed by rhythmic footsteps. even though you and miles both knew the footsteps belonged to rio, the hallway was dark, so neither you or him could see her until she stepped into the living room. her hair was down instead of being braided or put into a ponytail like it usually was. she was trying to slide a hoop into the earring hole in one of her ears. she was in one of her fancier outfits.

"jeez, you kids been on the couch all day?"

“we went to the fair,” miles replied, a smile tugging at one corner of his lips.

“oh really? explains the oversized oso on your bed. papa, didn’t you use to watch that one show… what was it called? spy oso?”

“special agent oso, mami,” miles corrected her, a hint of embarrassment fermenting in his voice. his teeth were clenched and his eyebrows were furrowed. “and that’s stitch, not a bear.”

you were stifling a laugh, one of your hands shielding the grin on your mouth while the other clutched your stomach. rio didn’t see, but miles did and he rolled his eyes at you.

“i left the snacks in your room, i’ll be right back," you told miles before you got up and disappeared down the hall.

“stitch? what’s a—” rio stopped herself and shook her head. “actually, never mind. how was the fair?”

miles answered her anyway. “it’s an alien, mom. from lilo and stitch. and the fair was good, we had a lot of fun. i can show you pictures later.”

“good,” rio smiled but then broke into a whisper. “miles, mejor la llevas a casa. don’t let that girl wander around all by herself at night.”

“alright, alright,” he put his hands up in defense. “you know i always take her home, calmáte.”

“alright, then. just making sure," rio retorted. "anyway, i’m in a hurry, i’m going to meet your dad, his coworker, and his coworker's wife somewhere. comportarse,” rio cautioned in a stern tone of voice, walking over to the couch and planting a kiss on her son’s cheek.

“i will,” miles promised as his mom hastily walked to the front door.

“tell [name] i’ll see her soon,” rio called out to miles before shutting the door.

a few moments later, you emerged from the shadows that lurked in the hall and took your seat near to miles on the couch. you scooted closer to him and pulled the blanket over both of your legs, handing him his bag of chips then opening your own. he hadn’t chosen something for you guys to watch yet.

“where’d your mom go?” you inquired, looking around.

“somewhere with dad,” miles answered, shrugging his shoulders at the same time. “she told me to say she’ll see you soon though.”

“aww,” you grinned. you really did love rio. you had to stop yourself from chuckling when you recalled her bringing up one of the shows miles used to watch as a kid. as hilarious as you found the whole thing, you held in your laugh anyway. you refocused your attention to the tv on the other side of the coffee table. it didn't take you long to realize that your beloved boyfriend still had yet to choose a movie to watch or a show to binge. “what should we watch tonight?... homecoming?”

“jesus, no,” miles frantically shook his head, waving his arms around in a panic.

you were referring to beyoncé's 2018 coachella headlining performance movie. you’d made the boy watch the film with you more times than he could count on you two's twenty fingers combined. miles knew the name's every song being performed, the lyrics, and what order they were performed in. he had almost memorized all of the dance breaks, but not willingly. he swore that the word “homecoming” alone triggered some kind of ptsd. miles knew you too well. he was well aware that the renaissance movie would be a homecoming repeat, but maybe ten times worse. he'd been mentally preparing for that as well.

“booooo, you’re boring,” you frowned.

“thanksgiving is coming up, how about that one charlie brown movie?”

“only if we can binge christmas movies after.”

“deal.”

maybemymali ©

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#☆ namy recs #☆ namy fic recommendations #☆ namy fic recs

[spid3namy]

♱ STRANGER IN BROOKLYN.

pairing: e-1610!miles x afrolatina!fem!reader

genre: friends to lovers, comedy, romance, fluff,

warnings: coarse language, possible mentions of violence, reader is implied to be 5'3, physical features mentioned, both are implied to be seniors in school

now playing: jump - kris kross

SYNOPSIS: As Miles would look at the many crowds of students that roamed the halls, he knew they they would never understand him in any meaningful sense. Yes the girls would bat their eyelashes in flirtatious ways at him and the boys would dap him up every time, Miles still felt incredibly alone. He felt that nobody would understand him. Well, that was until he met you. The problem with you, however, was that you weren't a fan of Spider-Man.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Miles, having his ears filled with the sounds of music from his headphones, was casually walking down the streets of Brooklyn on his way to school. His attention was drawn to his surroundings, as he observed the people in his vicinity, appreciating the close-knit community within his neighborhood. He took in the moment before being interrupted by Roberto, the owner of Berto's Bodega. Roberto, his hand placed firmly on Miles's shoulder, shouted a greeting in a friendly tone.

"Oye! Cómo estás, Miles?" He yelled, making Miles jump somewhat before responding with a grin.

He continued his conversation with Roberto and replied with a cheerful disposition, expressing his well-being to the storeowner.

"I'm good, tio. I'm just on my way to school," he said, displaying a sense of gratitude as he prepared to continue onward on his journey.

"Ay, bueno! You go on then. Say hi to your ma for me," Roberto continued, waving Miles off with well wishes.

Mile was still on edge but decided to move on. He simply nodded and put his headphones back on, opting to focus on his music as he continued down the street.

Miles enjoyed the music that his parents played during their youth and was in a rather pleasant mood as he danced from side to side, greeting everyone with high fives as he passed by. The moment, full of cheer and good deeds, felt like it was out of a movie, which only compounded the joy that Miles felt.

However, his peaceful walk was interrupted when he spotted a girl across the street talking to an older woman, the interaction catching his attention. He stopped to observe their interaction, not wanting to be a distraction but also curious to learn more about the situation.

Miles, noticing the girl speaking in an affectionate manner to the older woman, realized that the two must have been speaking about something that carried emotional weight. As if to echo the girl's kindness, she held the woman's hands, expressing empathy.

As Miles observed the girl across the street, he could not help but be drawn to her appearance. Her well-kept half-up, half-down ponytail stood out to him as an attractive element of her overall aesthetic.

With a sense of curiosity, he was further intrigued as he watched her carrying herself with confidence and grace. What Miles appreciated most, however, was the fact that she was dressed in the same uniform as he was, pointing to the fact that she was a fellow student of Brooklyn Visions Academy.

The older woman, after her conversation with the girl, turned to notice Miles standing on the opposite side of the road, prompting her to call out to him.

"Miles, eres tú?" She called out, causing the young man to regain his bearings and shift his focus towards her.

The older woman took a step forward, but Miles, aware of her difficulty in walking, decided to jog across the street to reach her. With his pace increasing, he managed to catch up to her halfway, slowing down as he approached her.

Miles made his way towards the bench, accompanied by the older woman, whom he had known as Antonia for the majority of his life as she would often babysit him during his childhood whenever his parents were working late shifts. Upon reaching the bench, he began to speak to her in a gentle tone.

"What're you doing out here so early, Antonia?" He asked, his smile reflecting his genuine curiosity.

"Oh, you know me. I love my morning walks," she chuckled, her own warm expression indicating that she, too, enjoyed their interaction.

The interaction between Miles and Antonia continued, the elderly woman looking at the young man with pride.

"Look at you, you've gotten so big," she said in awe, lightly pinching his cheeks in fascination.

"Indeed, I have," Miles responded, his smile growing wider as he felt the old woman's approval.

As they continued to laugh, she decided to ask him a bold question.

"Tienes una novia?" Miles' expression turned to one of surprise, only to be followed by hysterical laughter, both of them unable to contain their amusement at the unexpected question.

At the thought of school, Miles's focus instantly shifted as he remembered the urgency of the situation. He got up from the bench, taking the time to give Antonia a hug as he said goodbye, feeling refreshed after their interaction. Having spent some time with her, he knew that he would definitely tell his mother about their conversation when he got home.

Still filled with the joyful sentiments from earlier, Miles decided to take a shortcut, slipping his headphones back on as he did so. With a smile on his face, Miles decided to utilize his spider abilities for a shortcut, quickly scaling the brick wall of a nearby building and using his webs to swing his way to school.

Along the way, he had to deal with a few pigeons, who had decided to attack him mid-swing. After finally arriving at school, he entered the dorm he shared with his best friend Ganke, to discover that he was still busy playing video games on his bed.

"Don't you have history right now?" Ganke asked casually.

Quickly transitioning from relaxed to stressed, Miles grabbed his bag and rapidly began inserting history textbooks, rushing and panicking.

Once he was finished, and Ganke continued to remain glued to the TV screen, Miles stood at the door, looking back at his friend.

"Yes, yes I do. And get your feet off the dresser, that's nasty," he exclaimed before leaving the room and shutting the door behind him.

With his history books packed and his bags on his shoulder, Miles proceeded down the hallway in search of his history class. The boring subject was not his favorite, and he had grown used to being greeted with many staring faces as he entered the classroom. With a deep breath, he entered the room and took his seat, already feeling the weight of all the gazes upon him.

Miles took a seat in the classroom, earning the scolding look of his teacher before the lesson continued. He let out a sigh of relief, feeling grateful to have made it to class, even if it was not on time. Miles then leaned over to grab his history books out of his backpack, but he was quickly interrupted by the sharp tingling sensation in his head. Looking to his left, he saw the same girl that he had seen earlier sitting right next to him. He could not help but wonder why his spider-senses seemed to be going off in her presence.

He continued watching her as she drew in her sketchbook without paying any attention to the lesson. He found her dedication to her work to be endearing, especially as she constantly pushed up her glasses to prevent them from falling off her nose. Miles, realizing that he was not the only one who had a passion for art, was intrigued by this girl. He wondered what other parallels they had in common.

The peaceful moment was suddenly disrupted by Matias, a fellow classmate of Miles, who tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention. Matias then leaned over to take a closer look at the girl, greeting her with a distasteful glance. With his mischievous nature, he proceeded to crumple up a piece of paper before attempting to throw it at her.

Luckily for the girl, Miles, with the help of his spider-senses, was able to catch the paper with ease, preventing it from hitting her.

Matias was disappointed that his prank was foiled, as Miles had caught the paper before it could hit her. The girl, sensing the situation, rolled her eyes in response to Matias, her gaze returning to her drawing. Miles, impressed by her ability to read the situation effectively, continued to discreetly observe her as she drew in her sketchbook.

As the bell rang, signaling the end of the first period and the start of the second, Miles and his classmates began packing up their things and heading out the door. Miles stood up, slinging his backpack over his shoulder as he looked around for the girl, feeling surprised to discover that she had left already. As he turned to look at the door she had left through, Miles realized that he had missed his opportunity to speak to her.

Miles made his way out of the classroom, his feelings of disappointment growing as he did so. Continuing on the path towards his locker, he was suddenly greeted once again by his friend Ganke, offering him a warm smile. With Ganke by his side, he was distracted by a series of feminine giggles coming from somewhere nearby. He felt his senses tingling once again, prompting him to look in the direction of the sound.

As Miles observed the situation unfolding, he watched as two girls, presumably named Leila and Claudia, went to confront the girl from his history class. Known as the academy's most popular duo, the girls were loved and admired for their looks. Although their appearance was nothing short of stunning, their actions, on the other hand, were not always pleasant.

As Claudia walked up to the girl, Miles watched in shock as she pushed the girl into a nearby locker. His jaw clenched in a show of anger, his mind racing as to what he could possibly do to help.

In the midst of the chaotic scene, Miles, who was witnessing everything unfold with growing anger, was surprised to see the girl react to Claudia's push. Waiting for the perfect moment, she tapped Claudia's shoulder, eliciting a response of curiosity. Once Claudia had turned around, the girl took advantage of this moment, quickly slapping her across the face.

The sudden and unexpected move caused Miles to feel a wave of admiration for her cleverness, his eyes wide in amazement as the situation continued to develop.

With the slap, Claudia had now become enraged and ready for a full-on fight. As the girl walked away, Claudia was unable to resist the temptation, reaching for her hair. Before she could grab it, however, Miles intervened, grabbing hold of her wrist and preventing the unwanted interaction. Surprised by his actions, Claudia looked at him in shock, unable to understand his decision.

"What? Miles... you're supposed to be my friend. What the hell are you doing?" She asked, a note of confusion in her tone.

Miles shook his head defiantly, indicating his reluctance to allow Claudia to continue with her behavior.

"You don't even know that freak, Morales," Leila replied, rolling her eyes at her friend's frustration.

Still holding Claudia's wrist, Miles remained unsympathetic to her pleas, his gaze growing firmer as he responded.

"Get a life and stop being such a bitch to others. It's kinda sad if you ask me," he stated bluntly, his voice full of strength and conviction.

As the crowd laughed, Claudia felt the sting of embarrassment wash over her, her face growing red with shame. The humiliation, however, did not last long, as it was soon replaced by anger, which would soon be unleashed upon Miles. Without hesitation, she swung a punch to his face, only to have that fist miss him completely.

With the help of his spider-sense, Miles dodged the attack with ease, his body moving before he even had a chance to think about it.

Miles felt the urge to laugh upon discovering Claudia's attempt at hurting him, his disappointment growing even more.

"Really, Claudia? Is that all you got?" He giggled, taking the opportunity to tease her before pushing her by her forehead, causing her to fall to the ground.

The crowd had erupted in laughter once more, their amusement growing louder as Claudia ran away in embarrassment.

With Claudia gone from his line of sight, Miles began to search for the girl once more, managing to spot her as she was digging into her locker.

Walking up to her, Miles leaned against the locker next to hers and spoke to her kindly.

"You good?" he asked in a gentle tone.

The girl nodded quietly in response, continuing her focus on her mission to find whatever it was that she needed inside her locker. He smiled to himself at the sight of her dedication to her search, finding it endearing. Once the girl was finished, she promptly shut her locker, prompting Miles to speak up again.

"I'm Miles, by the way," he said nervously, the sound of his voice slightly louder than he had intended.

The girl, who had finished searching, proceeded to offer up a handshake to Miles, who was still standing next to her. Unsure of what to do, he extended his hand as well, ready to shake hers.

"Y/n. Just for the record, I really didn't need your help," she stated confidently, looking him in the eye as she spoke, her tone conveying her lack of appreciation for his actions.

As Y/n walked off towards her next class, Miles' attention was quickly drawn to a piece of paper that had fallen from the books she was carrying. Upon spotting the paper laying on the floor, Miles acted quickly, sprinting towards it before anyone else could accidentally step on it.

Miles, as his curiosity peaked, proceeded to gently pick the paper up in order to inspect it further.

He quickly tapped on Y/n's shoulder just as she was about to enter her classroom, stopping her in her tracks. She turned around to face him, greeting him with her piercing eyes, which sent shivers down Miles' spine. He gulped in nervousness, unsure of what to say to her, especially since she did not seem to be particularly impressed with him.

With a nervous hand, Miles held the paper out to her.

Y/n took the paper out of Miles' hand with a slightly warm smile, her lips forming a gentle curl up. With that, she entered her classroom, leaving Miles no time to continue their interaction. As Miles turned to leave as well, he felt a new tingle in his head, much stronger than the previous one, indicating that something else may be going on. These strange sensations that he felt were not what he associated with Y/n before, which meant that this could be much worse than he thought.

Miles quickly scanned the area, but nothing seemed to stand out at first. When he leaned against the wall, an immediate punch swung his way. With the help of his spider-senses, he easily managed to dodge the attack, looking for its origin. His eyes darted about as he assessed the situation, noticing a boy standing in the distance with eyes that glowed green. Realizing that the boy must have been a villain in disguise, Miles took a defensive position and prepared himself for a possible attack.

He quickly slipped into his spider suit, ripping off his school uniform to reveal the costume underneath. He did not seem to be taking the situation too seriously, choosing to wait patiently for his opponent to attack first.

"C'mon dude, a school of all places?" He said, a chuckle escaping his lips, his tone indicating his lack of tension in the situation.

As the boy grew angrier, he proceeded to use his telekinetic powers to rip the lockers off the walls and toss them at Miles, who was able to dodge those lockers flawlessly. With the use of his webs, Miles was able to ensure that the lockers did not create too much noise upon making an impact.

Suddenly, Miles felt his spider senses warning him again, prompting him to turn back around and notice Y/n leaving the classroom, looking down at her phone as she continued on her way.

Miles caught Y/n off-guard as he swung over to her, promptly picking her up by the waist and positioning her away from the pending battle. With a deeper voice, he spoke confidently to her, hoping to impress her.

"Ma'am, leave the school while you can," he advised in a firm tone, his eyes tracking her as she rolled her eyes and turned to walk down the hallway.

"Whatever you say, Spider-Weirdo!" Y/n exclaimed with a hint of irritation in her tone, not willing to comply with his advice.

Miles, on the other hand, simply sighed and focused his attention back on the villain, dodging his latest attack with ease. With a swift kick, he managed to send the villain flying out of one of the windows. Without hesitation, Miles jumped out of the window after his target, ready to face him in a one-on-one duel.

Miles landed onto the ground outside, rolling to avoid any potential injuries. Looking up, he noticed the villain floating in the air just a few meters above him, preparing another attack. With a smirk on his lips, Miles extended his fist upwards, releasing a single web that wrapped around the villain's arm, causing him to crash down to the ground, landing with a loud thud. Before he could react, Miles had already approached the villain and placed a foot over his head, his expression now stern and serious.

"Give up already," he muttered, his tone filled with determination.

As the fight began to die down, Miles noticed that the glow in the boy's eyes was now beginning to fade away, becoming its natural color of brown. He felt confusion wash over him, promptly removing his foot from the boy's head. He then looked up at Miles with a sincere expression.

"Th... Thank you, Spider-Man," he gasped, sounding exhausted but relieved.

In response, Miles raised an eyebrow, wondering why the boy was showing such gratitude.

"Why're you thanking me?" He asked, his voice filled with curiosity.

Moments later, two students ran up to them, immediately tending to the boy and helping him up.

"It was a science project gone wrong," one student explained as she wrapped the boy's arm around her shoulder, offering him some support.

"You stopped him before he could hurt anybody, so, thank you," the other added, offering Miles her appreciation.

Taking their words into consideration, Miles simply nodded in response, accepting their gratitude while feeling slightly awkward about the situation.

While everything seemed to have calmed down, Miles took advantage of the situation and decided to run somewhere where he could change back into his school uniform, wanting to return to the scene as Miles Morales instead of Spider-Man.

Upon turning the corner, he was surprised to encounter nobody other than Y/n, who had been a central focus for him the entire day.

"Are you following me, Morales?" She asked, squinting her eyes at him.

"Addressing me by my last name now, are we?" He teased, looking down at her with a playful smirk pulling against his lips. Y/n rolled her eyes and proceeded to walk along the sidewalk, to which Miles promptly followed, drawn to her.

"What're you doing? School's not out for another…four hours," he asked with a slight chuckle, counting the time left on his fingers.

"So you are following me," Y/n responded in a blunt tone, completely avoiding Miles' question.

He chose not to press the issue further, instead seeing it as an opportunity to get to know her better. As they walked the sidewalk together, Miles turned his attention towards her and decided to strike up a conversation.

"So, I see that you're into art," he blurted out, turning his attention fully towards her.

"Perhaps. Are you?" She asked, her response prompting Miles to become a touch flustered but happy at the same time.

It seemed that he could do no wrong in her presence, which he found to be quite odd. Nevertheless, he was quite pleased with himself for striking up a conversation with her, finding all the right things to say.

Miles nodded in response to her question, which prompted Y/n to give a soft chuckle, her eyes filling with amusement. He could not help but take in her natural beauty, finding it to be quite spectacular.

After a moment of admiring her, he decided to look away, not wanting to creep her out. As he looked down at their feet, he noticed that they were strolling in sync with one another, causing Miles to smile slightly as a result.

The two of them, although having never interacted before, managed to establish a sense of unspoken chemistry between them throughout their walk.

After walking for an extended period of time, Miles and Y/n eventually stumbled upon a park, to which they both decided to take a moment to rest and explore. Seated on a park bench, the two looked around at the environment, taking in what was around them.

☆

yes, this is the start of a new series i'm making up. trust the process y'all .

#☆ namy recs #☆ namy fic recommendations #☆ namy fic recs

[spid3namy]

this is so me fr LMAO

like i lowkey be having the best convos with myself 😍

im not that crazy i promise.

#☆ namy talks #☆ namy won't shut the hell up #☆ namy answers

[spid3namy]

heyyy 😍

okay so cus im the middle of like writing smth new, i decided to make a taglist cus ya know, why not.

so, you can sign up to join the taglist here!

#☆ namy talks #☆ namy won't shut the hell up #☆ namy is so awkward #☆ namy tag list

[spid3namy]

HI I JUST REMEMBERED TO GET ON TUMBLR

my immature ass dead ass giggled at that meme bro 💀

BUT HI POOKIE 🫶 IM GLAD YOU REMEMBERED FRFR

#☆ namy talks #☆ namy won't shut the hell up #☆ namy answers

[spid3namy]

# EVERYTHING

☁︎ he cheated, & you lost everything.

pairings ; 1610 or 42 miles x black!fem!r

warning(s) ; cursing , black reader , "violence", mention(s) of blood.

genre ; maybe angst?

a / n ; somethin off the top cause im feelin a lil uugh, today. if i said this isnt a rant in the form of a fic then i'd be lying.

he had played you.

played the fuck outta you. all the "i love you"'s , meant fucking nothing. it was like everything that could go wrong in your relationship, was.

first it was the arguments,

then, it was the constant silent treatment,

then, the blocking on social media,

and finally you caught him. all hugged up with some bitch on his instagram. "are you fucking kidding me miles?! who even is this bitch!!"

"man.. ma its just my fri-" -- "no! dont start with that bull miles, tell me the truth bro." you yelled. your voice cracking whilst tears pooled in your eyes.

you were crying,

not only because you were sad, but because you were angry. fucking fuming if you will.

you couldnt believe he would cheat on you after everything. he'd met your parents, your cousins, your whole family, & they all loved him. but not like you loved him.. not even close. "aww, ladybug, its okay." your mother coo'd as she held you.

but it wasnt ok. he cheated on you, and then lied- straight to your face.. you couldnt even be mad anymore, all you could do was cry, and cry. "y/n don't cry, he's a jerk."

is all they could say. but how were you supposed to not cry? he cheated, with her. you figured it would happen one day but now? you'd always been second to her, your whole life.

projects , dance , everything.

you were fucking sick of it.

so here you were. sitting in the principal's office, with a trail of blood running from your nose.

"y/n , your mom's here to pick you up." the lady in the front office spoke. you grabbed your belongings and walked past her.

already knowing you were in for an earful when you got home.

#☆ namy recs #☆ namy fic recommendations #☆ namy fic recs

[spid3namy]

— AUGUST

pairing : e!42 miles x mixed!female reader

summary : rumors spread like wildfire around school, everyone knew everyone's business. who knew the only rumor about you and your boyfriend would be true...?

contains : angst, cheating, song inspired (obviously), they are mid to late teens, miles lowkey stupid asf, implied lying (kind of), might have some incorrect spanish, cussing, not proof read

divider creds : saradika

word count : 2031

notes : lowkey, i only wrote this cus i literally love this song and figured why not write angst. this is my way of being productive while also being lazy asf LMAO. i probably might start a taglist for people who wanna be tagged when i post new things but we’ll see. anyways, i hope you enjoy the story <3

“Will you call when you're back at school...?”

Summer vacation.

For some, it was a great way to get away from school. To hang out with friends, to spend time with family. Others, it was nothing but a cruel and long three and a half months. 

For you, it was supposed to be a great three and a half months!

Until you found out that you were being shipped away to your grandparents house to spend time with them. Sure, you loved your grandparents but they were just.. so old. Summer was supposed to be the time when you hung out with your best friends!

And most importantly, your boyfriend! But no. 

Before you knew it, you had been packed up and sent on a flight all the way up to the shitty state of Washington. And that’s cruelly how you spent your summer vacation. Being around old people for a long three and a half months literally sucked.

September 18.

The day school started was a nightmare.

Rumors spread around like wild-fire at Visions Academy. Well, you knew that much. Especially with all the rumors that happened last year about the girl that had gotten pregnant. Of course, that rumor had been a lie. But everyone knew about it in the spam of like 20 minutes.

“Y/N! Have you heard yet?”

Your best friend, Juno, is the first one to come up to you the moment you walk through the doors. She was always so pretty when she came to school. If you all didn’t have to wear uniforms, she’d probably be the hottest girl in school with those fire ass fits you knew she owned.

“Heard what exactly?”

“Okay, so I’m guessing you haven’t heard then.”

You look at the girl and raise an eyebrow, brushing your braids behind your shoulder to flow down your back. What the hell was she on about now? Juno was your best friend, yes, but she was too into the gossip the school had going on. Most times, you couldn’t even believe the words she said. 

“Well, are ya gonna tell me?”

Juno stared at you for a few moments before she shrugged, figuring that if you really wanted to know then she would tell you. Even if she knew it was gonna hurt you, it was best if you found out from her and not some random stranger who probably would tell it in the worst way possible.

“Promise you won’t get mad?”

“Uh.. okay? I promise.”

Juno let out a breath and gripped the strap of her tote bag tightly before she spoke in a mess of jumbled up words. “Okay so basically, I heard from Dorothea who heard it from Suki who heard it from Rose who heard it from Verity who heard it from Betty who heard it from Venus, herself, that she and Miles had a little fling over the summer.”

You blink as you watch Juno suck in a huge intake of air. She was acting as though she had been waiting a long time to gain some type of air in her lungs. 

You soon burst out into laughter and shook your head, holding your stomach as you laughed. Juno watched you with confusion clear on your face; she clearly didn’t understand what the hell was funny. 

Once you had slowly started to calm down, you wiped an imaginary tear from your eye and shook your head, looking at the female. 

“Whew, thanks Jun, I really needed a laugh today.”

“I’m being serious, Y/N. I totally think it’s true too!”

“That’s ridiculous, Miles would never do anything like that. Me and he are locked in.”

Juno stares at you before she shrugged; the two of you started your descent down the hallway to where your shared first class was. 

“‘M just sayin’ what I heard. Only Miles would really know what happened. Just hope he doesn’t lie to you.”

You snort and roll your eyes playfully, nudging her with your shoulder and looking over at her. “He would never lie to me.”

“Whatever you say, Y/N. But just remember: men ain’t shit”

“Tha.. thank you for that, Juno. But you’re not really the greatest person to say that. Especially since you’re biased as hell.”

“What? I am not biased!” 

“Yes you are”

Juno rolled her eyes as the two of you walked into the classroom. Anatomy, the board read.

Great, seeing bodies and stuff at 8 in the morning was gonna be so fun. And it was a block class. How fun.

✰

Lunch. Possibly the only good thing about being at this stupid school. You and Juno stand in line together, looking at all the options of food you can pick out. It’s not much. Pizza, nachos, salads, and hot dogs. Barf. 

You let out a sigh and grabbed a plate that had a pretty decent sized slice of pizza. Juno looks over at you and makes a face before she reaches over to grab a salad. The two of you quickly scan your school ids to pay for the food before you walk over to a table where Miles had been sitting. He had been there alone for a while now. 

He was fortunate enough to have his own food.

Juno sits in front of you two before she nudges her head over to the male who was too busy drawing in his stupid sketchbook to even notice that you were even there. You give a look before you sit down next to your boyfriend, peering over his shoulder a little to see what he was doing.

“Whatcha drawin’?”

“You.”

The answer was so flat, so blunt. It caused your cheeks to heat up when you realized that he was, in fact, drawing you. Miles had always been so good at drawing. It was one of his many talents. 

“You two make me sick.”

“You’re just jealous, Jun. It’s not our fault that your mystery girl doesn’t know you exist.”

Juno lets out a dramatic cry and puts her head down when you mention the girl she had a crush on since 8th grade. It was a little cute that she’s liked her for so long. Yet, she has never even attempted to make a move on her.

“I just wish Leni would notice me.”

“Just talk to her, it ain’t that hard.” That earned Miles a glare despite the fact that he didn’t even really see it. Not like he really cared. He was just speaking the truth.

“Not everyone is brave enough for that, Miles.”

“Jus’ quit being a fuckin’ pussy and talk to her.”

Juno glared at him more and started to stand up. You shake your head quickly to get her to sit down. You already knew where this was headed and you really didn’t want the two of them to get into a huge argument. Not again. Not this school year.

Juno lets out a noise of frustration before she sits back down, her hand gripping the fork in her hands tightly. 

“At least, I didn’t cheat on my girlfriend.”

That seemed to gain his attention. Miles looked up from his sketchbook and quickly put his pencil down, looking at her with a look that could only be described as anger.

“Where the hell did you hear that from?”

“Miles..”

“Callarse la boca”

You look offended by his words but you don’t have time to dwell on it before Miles speaks again, his voice clear with annoyance.

“Where did you hear that from, Juno? Huh?!”

“Dorothea told me.”

Miles takes a deep breath at that, his nostrils flaring slightly as he lets out a deep and heavy exhale. He was screwed because now you knew about it. And he knew how you were going to act now that you knew. 

“Why are you gettin’ so upset, babe? It’s not like it’s true, right?”

Miles looks over at you and sighs, his shoulders tensing up as he clears his throat awkwardly. Guess it was time to be honest now. 

“Mi vida, listen... it-”

You blink and stare at you, anger slowly starting to fill up your body. You don’t even let him get another word out before you raise your hand and slap him. The feeling caused his face to sting, his face turned to the side from the impact. He lets out a slow breath and nods to himself; he knew he deserved it. 

“Fuck you, Morales.”

And with those harsh words spat, you get up and walk away from him. Juno and Miles both watch as you leave before Juno looks over at him, shaking her head and letting out a sigh.

“You fucked up man.”

“No, really? Thanks for the news flash, sherlock.”

“Don’t get smart with me, boy.”

Miles glares at the girl as she gets up and goes after you. God, he was so fucking stupid!

✰

It’s been a week since you last spoke to Miles. You have been avoiding him at school and even went as far as changing seats in the classes you shared with him. You did everything in your power to try and be as far away from him as possible. Miles didn’t seem to let that affect him.

Even if you were far away from him, he would still do his very hardest to talk to you. To explain what happened between him and Venus over the summer. But of course, you didn’t listen. Couldn’t listen to a word he said. It would be nothing but a lie.

Juno was right; men ain’t shit.

It was almost sickening to think that your once loyal and sweet boyfriend would turn out to be a dirty, rotten cheater! And to think it only took one summer for him to change. That was so fucked up man. You hated how easily you had allowed yourself to be betrayed. 

How could someone be so sweet one minute then betray you the first chance they got? It really made no sense to you. 

A knock on your bedroom door was enough to pull yourself from your thoughts. Your head snapped up just as the door opened to reveal Juno, a sheepish smile on her face as she practically jumped on you.

“What are you doin’ here, Jun?”

“I was summoned by your father.”

You let out a snort and roll your eyes, moving over slightly to give her more room to sit on the bed. It was sweet how she wanted to comfort you but you already knew it wasn’t going to work. You were too hurt to ever feel better after just a few visits but you appreciate the effort.

“Should I beat his ass?”

“No.. it’s fine, Jun. I don’t really care, ya know? I already got over it!”

“Mhm. and is that why you’re still avoiding him?”

“Shut the fuck up.”

Juno lets out a chuckle and moves closer to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder gently and pulling you closer for a side hug. It was the best thing she could think of doing right now. 

“Ya know.. He’s stupid for doing that to you. He don’t know what he’s missing.”

And that did it. Before you knew it, you had burst out into tears. Juno rubbed the side of your arm gently and allowed you to cry on her shoulder, soaking her shirt with your tears. She knew you probably needed this right now.

“I fuckin’ hate him, Jun.”

“I know, Y/N.”

“I wish I never met him!”

“I know, Y/N”

The two of you stay like that for an hour. Maybe longer. Who knew? It didn’t matter anyway. Juno was too busy trying to comfort you while you bawled your eyes out. It hurt so fucking much. 

All the trust that you had put into Miles was now gone. 

And it was all his fault. 

Seeing him everyday at school hurt worse than any pain imaginable. But at least you had Juno by your side, you knew she would never hurt you. She was your best friend. She was different than him.

You wish you had never fallen in love with Miles Morales.

#☆ namy writes #e42 miles #earth 42 miles morales x reader #angst #earth 42 miles angst #earth 42 miles morales angst #e42 angst #e42 miles morales angst #e42 miles morales x reader #across the spider verse angst #across the spiderverse

[spid3namy]

Ding! New Follower!

I love the way you write 🫶🫶

THANK YOU!!

im really glad you like my writing, it really means a lot to me 🫶

#☆ namy talks #☆ namy won't shut the hell up #answered #☆ namy answers

[spid3namy]

Miles morales × F reader with like just in general body issues like shes not curvy with an hourglass figure and she's just insecure thinking he doesn't find her body attractive

(definitely not projecting 🤡)

pairing : e!42/1610 miles x insecure!female reader

summary : you don’t feel pretty, miles decides to help show you just how beautiful you really are to him

contains : fluff, angst, insecurities, projection, kissing, somewhat body worship, they are in their late teens, probably incorrect spanish, cussing

word count : 1352

notes : okay, so like this request was really good fr cus i used to suffer from being really insecure back in the day so this was lowkey me projecting like a LOT. also, there won’t be TOO much detail about the body type just cus like i kinda want it to be inclusive to like everyone. anyways, enjoy the story! <33

Ugly. 

That’s the only thing you thought about when you stared at yourself in the mirror. 

The way your body looked made your stomach churn. The way you felt as though you were nothing was a worrying known feeling that you were pretty much used to by now. 

Shit sucked.

All the girls at school were so damn pretty. Each having beautiful traits on their bodies. Sophomore year of high school was when you noticed just how beautiful everyone but you was.

The guys were all over those girls. The ones with the beautiful long hair. Ones with those pretty eyes. Ones who had hourglass bodies. Ones who.. weren't you. 

It was almost pathetic how obsessed you had been when it came to how the other girls looked. Why couldn’t you look like them?

Why couldn’t your body be curvy?

Why couldn’t you have big boobs?

Why couldn’t you be pretty like the other girls?

Those questions rang through your head as you continued to judge yourself through the mirror. Why were you so fucking unlucky?

“Oye hermosa! You in here?”

You jump when you hear your boyfriend’s voice. He wasn’t supposed to be here until later! You let out a noise and quickly grab a hoodie from inside your dresser, throwing it over your head before you emerge from your bedroom.

“Hey, Miles..”

“Oh there you are, I’ve been calling your name for like 5 minutes now. I was worried you might’ve not been home.”

“Sorry.. I guess, I got distracted” 

Miles gives you a look before he presses a kiss onto your cheek, his arm wrapping around your waist delicately. You could feel your lips curve upwards into a smile from the affection you were given. Even if you were upset, he always knew how to cheer you up. He had always been good at that.

“How’s my beautiful girl doin’?” You try not to grimace when he speaks. 

You’re not beautiful. He’s lying to you. He just wants to make you feel better. You’re actually ugly. He doesn’t love you. He wants someone else. Someone who is better and prettier than you. 

That stupid voice in your head makes you want to scream. Why did it never shut up? Why did it always have to talk? 

But you knew it was true. The voice was just trying to help you. To show you the truth. Well.. the truth you’ve made up in your head anyway. 

“Mama, are you okay?” Miles rubbed a small circle on your waist; the feeling alone caused you to cringe.

“Don’t touch there..”

Miles stared at you in confusion, an eyebrow being raised and his hands moving up from your waist to your face. It was weird to see you being this way. One thing about being as insecure as you were, you never told anyone about it.

You preferred suffering in silence.

Besides, how was anyone really supposed to help with your body issues? With your insecurities? Sure, they can call you pretty all they want but could you really trust them? What if they were lying just to make you feel better? 

It was a never-ending cycle. 

“Mama, are you.. okay? Is somethin’ botherin’ you?”

“Leave it alone, Miles.”

“Y/N.”

“Miles.”

Miles lets out a heavy sigh and rubs his temples in annoyance. You always did this. Pushing things down was so annoying sometimes. Especially when all he wanted to do was help you! But no, you just had to refuse his help. 

He loved you, more than anything in the world, but sometimes you were a little too much for him.

“Y/N, tell me what the problem is. I wanna help you.”

“By doin’ what, Miles? It’s not like you can just magically turn me pretty.”

There it was. Before you even realized it, you had said too much. 

Miles stared at you and furrowed his eyebrows, his eyes scanning over your face before he took a step closer to you. You knew that look. That was the look he gave any boy that dared talk to you. That meant he was about to go off. And you sadly walked right into that. 

“What?”

“Nothin’, Miles. I ain’t even said nothin’.”

“Don’t play this game with me, chica. The fuck did you just say?”

“It’s nothing, just fuckin’ drop it.”

Miles gives you a look and you instantly know how stupid you were for refusing to tell him. You knew you couldn’t tell him. Couldn’t show him just how vulnerable you are. Couldn’t show him just how much you hated the way your body looked. How you didn’t look like other girls. 

He would think you’re pathetic. 

“You smokin’ again?”

“What? No!”

“Mhm. Well, you must be high out of your fuckin’ mind to think that you’re not the most gorgeous woman on this planet. Besides Megan Thee Stallion, of course.”

“Ha ha, you’re so fuckin’ funny.” You roll your eyes at his comment, your voice filled with nothing but sarcasm from his horrible attempt at a joke. Or whatever the hell that shit was.

Miles let out a snort and took a step closer to you, cupping your face and pressing a couple of kisses onto your face. It was like he was attempting to comfort you but it was awkward to do so. At least, that’s the impression you were getting from him. You appreciated the effort but it really wasn’t work out all that well. 

“Come on, jus’ look at you, mama.. You’re fuckin’ gorgeous.”

“Miles, quit.”

“Shh.”

You pout and squirm around in his grip, moving your gaze away from him. He was so embarrassing sometimes. Miles continued to press kisses onto your face before his hands soon moved down to under your hoodie.

“Miles.”

“Don’t worry, mama.. I ain’t gonna do nothin’.”

“Watch your hands, boy.”

“Yes, ma’am..”

You roll your eyes but otherwise allow his hands to wander around your frame. You let out a gasp from the feeling of his cold hands moving up and down your stomach, stopping just under where your bra sat. He was getting a little too handsy. But you trusted him. Trusted that he wouldn’t do anything. 

“You’re so gorgeous, mama. Especially when you wear those fire ass fits.”

“Mm? Which ones?”

“All of them.”

Your cheeks heat up from his comment; your hand instinctively comes up to push at his chest in embarrassment. He didn’t move away from you though, only got closer. 

You knew he couldn’t make the insecurities go away. But he was doing a hell of a good job taking her mind off the reasons she was insecure in the first place. Sure, she’ll remember them later but that was a problem for when she got there. Right now, she just wanted to focus on him.

His lips and the way they felt on her skin. His fingers touching her body. His voice whispering sweet words to her. Everything caused her brain to just shut down and focus on him. And god, she fucking loved him for that. 

“You’re so pretty, chica.”

You merely hum in response, your shoulders relaxing as he grabs your face. Miles looks into your beautiful e/c eyes and presses a quick kiss onto your lips, only a peck though. 

“Say it, mama.”

“Say what?”

Miles looks at you like the answer to the question was just so damn obvious. And it was but still.

“Say you’re pretty.”

“Miles, I-”

“Say it.”

You let out a deep sigh and stare at him for a while. He looks at you expectedly, his eyes staying locked onto yours. There was seemingly no escape from this. 

You scoff and roll your eyes before you mumble your next sentence, “‘m pretty.”

“Louder.”

“‘M pretty.” You repeat it a little louder than before, loud enough for the both of you to hear it. 

“Good.” Miles smiled and leaned forward, pressing his lips onto yours. It was sweet; it had always been sweet whenever you two kissed. 

That voice was still in the back of your head but at least it was silenced. For now.

#☆ namy writes #fluff #e42 miles #angst #earth 42 miles angst #earth 42 miles morales x reader #earth 42 miles x reader #earth 1610 miles morales x reader #earth 42 miles morales #earth 42 miles fluff #earth 1610 miles angst #earth 1610 miles x reader #earth 1610 miles morales x you #earth 1610 miles fluff

[spid3namy]

CORNELIA STREET

"i'm so terrified of if you ever walk away, i'd never walk cornelia street again."

barbie(s): e-42 miles morales & black fem reader

includes: angst

synopsis: following your breakup, you and miles meet up one last time to finish packing up the apartment you formerly shared.

wc: 3559

divider credz: @/bunnysrph a/n: i'm happy y'all liked my last fic!!! this fic is a one n done, so no second part. idek what fluff is 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ they’re sayin angst is good for the soul. i proof read this time, but i can't promise that there aren't any mistakes. enjoy! <3

teary-eyed, you sealed off the last box. it felt like that alone solidified everything, and the harsh reality would soon settle in: after today, you would never see miles morales again.

the bedroom you were in was dimly lit by the single lamp you had plugged in earlier because the clouds were a reflection of your mood, gloomy and dark. you felt a bead of deep sorrow roll down the right side of your face and hastily swiped it away. you sniffled, and you hated how the sound bounced off the walls that were now covered in nothing but the paint, as if they were taunting you. 

you glanced around the relatively dark and empty room. though the space was now vacant, those four walls held the sacred exchanges and cherished memories that you and miles shared within them. you’d rather forget every single one, good or bad. 

you wanted to forget all of the netflix shows you and miles binged in bed, or the mario kart you’d somehow always beat him at. you wanted to forget the late nights that you spent tending to his wounds, or consoling him when he was missing his father more than usual. you wanted to wipe your mind clean of each and every thought that involved your ex-boyfriend and lock them in a box. every one of your thoughts was miles. your head would forever be silent, but you were okay with that. you craved peace of mind more than anything else.

you stared at the box for a moment before you slid your fingers into the makeshift handles that were cut out on either side and stood up. you tried to make your face look as neutral as possible as you made your way to the living room. while you sauntered down the hallway with heavy footsteps, the wood beneath your feet squealed and creaked. you found yourself expecting to be met with the familiar picture frames of you and miles that usually hung from the wall, but you weren’t. 

you mentally beat yourself up for even hoping for such a thing. it’s been two months since you two broke up. you should be focused on finishing up the move anyway, not reminiscing over what would never be.

in the living room, miles was taping up all of the bigger boxes. some were his, while others were yours. he insisted on doing most, if not all of the heavy lifting. you were in no mood to argue about it, so you just let him. you walked past miles without saying anything, setting the last one of your boxes from the bedroom by the front door. you then made your way to the kitchen where your water bottle was sitting on the counter next to a box of pizza that you hadn’t seen before.

“i didn’t know you ordered food,” you said, opening the box and waiting for miles to respond before you took a piece, just in case he didn’t want you to. the pizza appeared to be untouched. you took a few sips from your water bottle and pursed your lips, swallowing hard. every interaction with miles was an awkward one.

“yeah,” he stood up and turned to face you. “it got here, like, five minutes ago. you can take some if you’re hungry.”

you capped your water bottle. “i think i’ll just take some home.”

“that’s fine,” he retorted flatly. he almost immediately went back to taping up boxes. 

you placed your water bottle back down on the counter and tapped your index fingers against the surface of the counter rhythmically before clearing your throat. you only declined eating right then because you knew water was the only thing you could keep down, and even that was threatening to make an escape.

“thanks, by the way.”

“it’s nothing,” miles was silent for a few beats. you watched him carefully, silently yearning for the boy you missed tremendously. he cut off a long strip of tape from the roll and pressed it against one of the boxes. “aight, let’s take all of these to the u-haul trucks. i’ll put your heavier boxes inside for you. we can just put the smaller boxes in our cars.”

you nodded and joined miles in the living room once again. over a span of forty minutes, you moved boxes from the living room to the u-haul truck. all you could think about while you did was how just three years ago, you and miles were moving boxes into the apartment. it happened to work out because your universities aren’t far from each other. you remember being so excited that you could barely even focus on moving any of the boxes. you were so convinced that miles was the one, and that the cozy apartment that you’d made yours to share was one of the many estates that you’d share in the future. push came to shove and your dream was unfortunately cut short. you’d have to find something else to fantasize about.

“you need any help moving furniture into your new place?”

“oh, no,” you smiled awkwardly. “i already have a few of my friends helping me out, so i’ll be good. thank you, though.”

miles hummed in acknowledgment and went back inside. for a moment, you stared at the front door and watched it close. you blinked a few times then shook your head, redirecting your focus back to putting the last few boxes in your car. you strolled over to your trunk and put the box down on the curb beside your tire and all of the other boxes so you could open it. 

loading the remainder of the smaller boxes took maybe six minutes. by the time you closed the trunk, miles was back outside, loading his own boxes into his own car. you fought the urge to watch him as he did. you knew that’d be ridiculous.

you reminded yourself that you were the one who initiated the breakup, not miles.

when you found out about miles being the prowler, you were both still in high school. he made it seem like a temporary job. you sympathized with him because you knew him and his mama needed money, but you were always on the edge regardless. you would lie awake at night, anxiously waiting by your phone for that text message that confirmed your boyfriend’s safety. some nights you only had to stay up until ten, while others robbed you of sleep completely. 

miles would often miss class, dinners with you and rio, or your dates due to prowler business. you were always covering for him when it came to his mom asking if you knew where he was, and you hated having to lie to her. miles had explained to you that what he does wasn’t something he could just quit like a normal job, because his job wasn't normal. despite your iffy feelings about it, you brushed it off and kept it pushing. 

the hope and the lie that this wouldn’t go on forever was the only thing keeping you going.

soon enough, college finally rolled around and you two rented your first apartment on cornelia street. being with him each and every day made you realize something; you were starting to understand that miles didn’t have any intention to retire the mask.

things started to get serious. miles would not only come home late, but injured. he’d climb through the window to your shared bedroom with cuts, grazes, and sometimes deep stab wounds. you couldn’t keep staying up until the early hours of the morning playing nurse after wasting away time wondering if miles was going to come home or not.

the night he returned to you after not coming back for two whole days was the same night you called it quits. you had been getting less and less of what you needed, and instead, growing increasingly stressed. as much as you loved miles, you didn’t want to live in fear for the rest of your life. you sat him down and explained that as you tended to his severe wounds. maybe you should’ve waited, but you were beyond angry.

though you were firm in your decision, that didn’t make it hurt any less. it almost hurt more because you were the one that did it. there was nobody else to blame because you were the one who had given up, at least that’s how you saw it.

“hey,” miles approached you. “i’m gonna head out now. you got everything?”

“yeah,” you replied, looking back at your car behind you, then up at the sky. “i’m actually about to leave too.”

“cool, cool,” he nodded. “i’ll see you around.”

“see you,” you waved gently as miles turned away. after one left to right, you put your hand down.

part of you expected more to come out of your last goodbye when in reality, there was nothing more to expect.

you didn’t stick around to torture yourself by watching miles leave. instead, you wound up in the living room of the apartment again. the emptiness of the room was daunting. you couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that starting tomorrow, the apartment wasn’t yours and miles’ anymore. someone else’s name would soon be on that lease. if they were anything like you and miles were, there’d be two more names on the lease. two more sets of memories to be made in every single room.

maybe they’ll bake snickerdoodles at three in the morning like you and miles did, or go on christmas movie marathons when halloween hadn't even passed yet. maybe they'd match halloween costumes when it finally arrived. maybe they'd go to carnivals and hang the strip of pictures from the photo booth on the wall. 

hopefully they wouldn't end up like you two.

❤︎₊ ⊹

about an hour later, you finally found it in yourself to leave. your u-haul truck was probably at your new place by now. your friends were coming over to help you unpack, and you still had to turn in your key to the landlord. on your way out, you noticed that the box of pizza from earlier was still on the counter. you went over to the kitchen and opened it to find that the pizza was still untouched. it's rare that miles ever forgets things. he had to have left it for you.

you closed the pizza box and left through the front door. for the last time, you locked it. you carried the box to your car and placed it in the passenger seat. when you closed the door, you got a sinking feeling in your stomach because you knew you'd never drive back there again. you didn't ponder on it for long before your eyes widened. you remembered you'd left a box in the guest room. you'd always been the more forgetful one, after all. you dashed back to the front door and quickly unlocked it. you hurriedly made your way to the room and sighed in relief when your eyes landed on what you were looking for. you picked up the box and groaned in annoyance when you realized it was a heavier one. complaining would only make the process longer, so you sucked it up and brought the box outside to your car.

suddenly, you felt something wet on your face and your eyebrows knitted together. you glanced up at the sky, now noticing that the clouds appeared darker, and the smell of rain was more prevalent than it was before.

“it’s not supposed to rain until six,” you thought, wiping the tiny drop of rain on your face with your sleeve.

by time time you'd managed to fit your box in the trunk with all of the others, the rain was pouring at an increasingly fast pace, drenching your phone, your outfit, and more importantly, your freshly braided hair. you pursed your lips and slowly closed your eyes. a desperate attempt to search for the patience to keep it together was made, but you broke down, weeping in agony instead. you’d suffocated your desolation deep in your being for far too long, and it wanted out. you had only kept it in because you didn’t think you needed to cry over miles as much as your body wanted you to. you figured that since your breakup was final and beneficial for the both of you, there was no reason to dwell on it. you preferred to let your sanity dwindle. even when sadness engulfed you the most, you refused to provide it with an outlet. the lumps in your throat that you had always swallowed felt like rocks, and your eyes had grown tired of you dismissing your tears back into your eye sockets with rapid blinking movements.

you wanted nothing to do with the breakup in general. you really despised the look your loved ones gave you every time you had to break the news of your failed relationship to them. most people would appreciate the pity and constant check-ins, but you deplored them. you only wanted to feel normal again. it was already bad enough that you couldn't feel whole without miles. you didn’t need people to remind you of that. 

you stood there on the curb stiffly, letting the drops of rain mask your tears as they fell. you felt lost right outside of what used to be your home. if your friends weren’t back at your new place awaiting your arrival, you probably would’ve stayed in that same spot for a little while longer. collecting yourself would take a minute, though.

you wiped your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodie, your mascara staining the fabric black as a result. you closed your eyes and breathed out, preparing to bury your feelings deep once again and walk to your car until you noticed there wasn’t rain soaking into your scalp or running down your face anymore. looking down at your feet, you could still see raindrops bouncing off of the ground. when you raised your head, you were greeted with a black umbrella towering over you. you reluctantly turned around to see none other than miles standing there before you, his grip firm on the handle of the umbrella.

even if miles didn't show it in his expression, you knew you looked a mess. you didn't need a mirror to know that your edges had lifted. your neat, spiraled swoops were now untamed strands that were just barely sticking to your head. the rainwater weighing the flyaways down was the closest thing you were getting to a hold. that wasn't the only part of your appearance that was in disarray. due to the profuse tears you'd just been crying, there were streams of mascara trailing down either side of your cheeks. you wiped them away and sniffled. to top it all off, your sweatshirt and your favorite pleated jean skirt were both doused in water. you really didn’t want miles to see how messed up you truly were over his absence. you began to fidget with the bracelet around your wrist, opting to feign your normal expression like everything was okay. it's not like miles could tell you were crying anyway. the rain may have fucked you over before, but it was doing you a service now.

“did you leave your pizza?” you asked. "it's in my car."

“i forgot my jacket inside of the apartment,” miles held it up in his other arm.

“oh,” you nodded, avoiding eye contact at all costs. it’s what you did every time you spoke now. you entered each room multiple times before you left. you hadn't seen his jacket anywhere. “well, i was actually just about to go.”

“you were standing idly in the rain,” miles retorted. his eyebrows lowered in a mix of both worry and confusion. 

“well, i—“

“you hate getting your hair wet, especially when you just got it done,” he interrupted you. “you also said you were about to leave back when i was leaving.”

your mouth hung open for about three seconds before you closed it. you had completely forgotten what you were going to say before miles cut you off. you didn’t even expect him to notice that you’d gotten your hair done. miles always had been attentive to you, but you expected him to pay little to no attention to you now.

“i did say that,” you confirmed, rubbing your thumbs against each other as a release for your nervousness. “but obviously i haven’t left.”

“why’s that?” miles angled his head. he was peering into your face like he was determined to uncover an answer without you having to utter a word. it made you nervous. “you need help with something else?”

“no, miles,” you exhaled, the never-ending interrogation making you restless. you somewhat felt like you were in high school again. for a split second, you were thrown back to the days when you first started crushing on miles. “i lived here for a while. i’m just gonna miss this place, that’s all.”

miles noticed that you were dodging his eyes. he clocked it from the start, actually. the very start. you haven’t looked him in the eyes since the night you ended things. he pressed his lips together and closed his eyes, sighing deeply before opening them again.

“[name], i owe you an apology,” he says lowly. “i know you hate what i do. i knew i wasn’t gonna stop any time soon and i shouldn’t have made it seem like i was going to, but you have to understand, mama, i’m in too deep. i don’t know if i can ever lead a normal life now.”

you continued to look down, your gaze fixed on the rain droplets that were splashing on the concrete instead. your mind doesn’t offer you any commentary, nor does it offer you solace. you’ve imagined this conversation a million times in your head. you’ve had this conversation a million times out loud. it ends the same way each time: with tears and a heavy heart, as well as the certitude that the same subject of whether or not miles would come home and decide he's had enough of making you worry, would be revisited in a curt amount of time. 

you thought this unbearable cycle would end when your relationship with miles did, but parting ways never did free you from the harrowing thoughts that occupied your feeble mind.

this had to be the last variation of that same dreadful conversation.

“it’s better this way. i don’t ever want to put you in danger. i wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something happened to you because of me—if you got hurt...” miles' voice trailed off.

you understood everything he was telling you. you always had. it wasn’t a difficult concept to grasp. again, it didn’t make the circumstances maim your heart any less. 

and miles would never truly get it. 

“you already hurt me, miles,” you finally look the boy in the eyes without even meaning to. “you’re gonna get yourself killed. you’re skilled, but you’re also lucky. really lucky. i don’t want your luck to run out. i hope you find a way to save yourself... to make a life for yourself without having to get your hands bloody.”

"me too," he replied after a couple of beats. 

still, he never would.

miles pushed the hand that had a grip on the handle of the umbrella forward, urging you to take it. your fingers brushed against each other as you reluctantly retrieved the handle from him. 

you wondered if there was something you should say…

do you ask to keep in contact? do you ask if you can still call him? do you ask if you can still visit? do you ask if you can still join him and his mama for dinner? do you tell him you still love him? do you ask for one more hug? do you ask for one more kiss?

do you ask if he’ll always love you?

miles’ hand dropped by his side, soon finding their way into the pockets of his basketball shorts. "take care of yourself, [name]."

that was it.

you were unable to think of something fast enough, so you stood paralyzed and watched miles jog back to his car. you didn’t feel even an ounce of shame as you watched your first love leave for the last time, your plans and your pre-determined future departing along with him. 

you knew that if it wasn’t for luck, you would never see the boy you loved so intensely ever again. if you ever did, you’d have to cope with the fact that his love for you would’ve more than likely faded to nothing but a memory stored deep in his mind, much like the thoughts of him that you longed to lock away. you really hated that things had to end the way they did, but no matter how much you loathed the veracity, miles would always be the prowler. there wasn’t any force or any drive—anything or anyone in that world that could make him stop. 

not even you.

one last time, you turned to face the place that served you well. it wasn’t you and miles’ apartment on cornelia street anymore, but it would forever hold the love you shared inside of it. at the end of the day, you knew that the walls that resided inside the building had seen generations of love in a multitude of forms. 

in regards to love, you knew that they would never cease to remember you and miles morales.

#☆ namy fic recommendations #i love this sm fr #fic recommendation #atsv #spiderverse recommendations

[spid3namy]

— DIFFERENT UNIVERSE PT.1

pairing : e!42 miles x mixed!female reader

summary : miles was being weird, not how he usually acted. he somehow found himself in the wrong universe, unbeknownst to you.

contains : a little angst, fluff, kissing, implied cheating??, cussing, they are in their late teens, happy endings i promise 

word court : 1142

notes : i rewatched atsv for like the 4th time and for some reason i decided that i wanted to write about what would happen if e!42 miles and e!1610 miles switched places like how it is at the end of the movie except nobody is like tied to a punching bag LMAO. this was my attempt at writing a longer fic too 😍

How did he end up here?

This wasn’t his earth. He didn’t understand how or why he was here but all he knew was that this was the wrong place. 

He couldn’t help the way that he felt stupid for allowing himself to get into this whole situation. 

“Miles..? You okay?”

Miles blinked and looked over at you, furrowing his eyebrows to try and adjust to his new surroundings. How did you get into his apartment? Or… what he thought was his apartment? He really had no idea anymore.

Everything was confusing him at this point. He didn’t know anything anymore.

“Miles.”

You snap your fingers in front of his face to gain his attention, not understanding why your boyfriend was acting so weird. Miles blinked once again and shook his head, running a hand over his face.

“Yeah.. yeah, ‘m fine.”

Okay. That was definitely weird. Since when did Miles have an accent? And since when did he have braids in his head? 

“Uhm.. okay?”

Miles let out a puff of air and shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. How the hell was he even supposed to get home? How did he even get here? He had no idea. 

“Qué pasa, Miles? You keep starin’ off into space.”

“‘M fine.. I promise”

Miles gave you an awkward smile and cleared his throat awkwardly, shoving his hands into his pockets. You looked familiar to him, like he’s seen you somewhere before. He wasn’t really sure. Maybe it was in his universe. Whatever it was, it was weird.

Miles flinched slightly when you touched his face. 

“What? You mad or somethin’?”

“Huh..?”

Okay, so that was definitely weird. Why was he acting this way? Have you done something wrong? You didn’t really know. But all you knew was that Miles, or whoever the hell this was, flinched when you touched him. That never happened. 

“Miles, quit fuckin’ playin’ around with me right now.”

“I don't know what you’re talking about..”

You let out a sigh and shook your head, your thumb caressing his cheek lightly. Miles couldn’t help the way that he felt comfort from how you touched his face. It was wrong, he knew that much, but it still felt so nice. 

He couldn’t enjoy it for too long though.

You pressed a kiss onto his lips, not one that was long, only a peck but Miles flinched back a little too fast. It made your eyebrows furrowed together at how he was acting. He couldn’t kiss you. Couldn’t even be with you because this wasn’t his universe and you weren’t his girlfriend.

“Estás bien? You’re fuckin’ actin’ weird, Miles”

Before he could even get a word out, the front door suddenly swung open. 

“Ay, Y/N.. you’re still here? I thought you would’ve gone home by now?”

“Sí but I figured I would keep Miles company ‘til you came home.”

“Well, I appreciate it.”

Miles blinked and looked over at the woman that was supposed to be his mom. 

What happened to her eyes? Why weren’t they green anymore? It was weird to him. 

Well, he already knew why her eyes weren’t green. This wasn’t his earth. This was someone’s earth. It wasn’t his and he hated it.

“Woah, Miles, what’d you do to your hair?”

“Huh..?”

“You like braids now? You’re no longer tender-headed?”

Miles blinked and squinted at Rio, almost like he was confused on what the hell she was talking about. And he was. 

What the hell did she mean tender-headed? He had been tender-headed a day in his life! 

But to make himself seem less suspicious and weird, he just nodded his head. The best thing he could do right now was blend in. 

“He’s been actin’ weird since he got here”

Miles looked over at you as he talked about him like he wasn’t even there. That annoyed him. He hated when people did that.

“Oh.. well I’m sure me and Jeff will be able to figure out why. Thanks for staying Y/N.”

“Of course.. Let me know if you need anything”

Miles watched as you left the apartment. It was weird. Jeff? That didn’t make any sense to him. Jeff was… dead. Had his mother found another man with the same name? That couldn’t be.

He knew his mother; she would never find someone else. 

Rio suddenly looked over at her son and took a step towards him, inspecting his hair and the way he looked. He was much shorter than before. 

“How did you get here so early? Your father said he was gonna take you home.”

“Uh.. Uncle Aaron took me home?”

Rio stared at him and blinked before she shook her head, moving her gaze away from him. This wasn’t a time for him to be bought up.

“Son, you know that ain’t possible.”

“Huh?”

Rio sighed and shook her head, rubbing her temples and walking into the kitchen. She had no idea what was up with him but she knew that something was definitely wrong. 

He was being so weird. 

“Miles, I know you miss Aaron.. We all do but that doesn’t mean you can just say stuff like that.”

“Sorry?”

Rio sighed heavily and shook her head, clearly fed up with her son’s antics. It was a little annoying how he was acting. She wasn’t in the mood to deal with this. She was too tired for all this.

Miles seemed to notice how annoyed she was and turned on his heels, walking further into the apartment and into ‘his’ room. 

The moment he opened the door, he saw so, so, many fucking posters. God, the room was a damn pigsty. How the hell could anyone live in this filth? 

Miles notices a sketchbook laid on the bed, his body now peaked with curiosity. At least they had one thing in common. He walked over and grabbed the book, flipping through the pages. A lot of them were so random. He took note of all the drawings he had of Aaron and some.. girl. 

Wow. Must’ve been the girl that was there earlier. There were also a few drawings of some other girl in some stupid superhero suit. Apparently this Miles is a fanboy. Totally not weird at all. He had to admit though, his counterpart was really good at drawing. Well, of course he was. 

They were the same person, just a different universe.

Miles could hear talking from outside the door. He slowly opened it and peeked outside, his eyes scanning around the apartment as he saw some guy, presumably Jeff, walking in the front door.

His.. his dad was still alive? Was he not captain here? He didn’t know for sure. He saw another figure behind the man. He was taller and had a wack ass ‘fro.

The other Miles was also here.

Shit.

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