How Much Are Your Words Worth?
Days before my seventeenth birthday my grandfather was in a freak accident. He worked at a factory and he was working up on a scissor jack with my cousin. The scissor jack was positioned in front of a machine with a door that was timed to open. The door opened right on schedule. It hit the scissor jack. My cousin jumped. My grandfather fell with the scissor jack. He was flown by helicopter to the hospital. The doctors worked all day. Only at the end of the day did they do a brain scan. Brain dead. That night, our family choose to turn off life support. He died.
His death was completely unexpected, the funeral very sad. The part I remember most is listening to my family and their friends reunite:
“I haven’t seen you in ages!” “We need to see each other more.” “Let’s plan to meet up.”
One month later, my other grandfather died on the same day that a cousin gave birth to premature twins. One twin weighed three pounds, the other five. The doctors didn’t know if they would make it. For years, my grandfather fought two kinds of cancer and diabetes. We saw his death coming. It was just as very sad.
At his funeral, many of the same people and many different people came together to remember and say good-bye to my grandfather. They sang the familiar chorus:
“I haven’t seen you in ages!” “We need to see each other more.” “Let’s plan to meet up.”
I saw and felt how fleeting life is. I also heard firsthand how we let life happen to us. The funeral-goers, brought to a halt in their grief, soon returned to letting the busyness of life dictate their time, activities, and priorities.
Thankfully, my cousin slowly recovered. No one would look at the twins today, now seven, and ever guess their very small and scary beginning.
At the second funeral, a resolve bloomed inside of me that thrives today. If you say you will do something, do it. You never know how much time you have left. So whether it’s visiting a friend, calling someone you love, or even doing the dishes, do what you say. Live as you like, but I have little time for empty talk. Say what you mean and do what you say.
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There is nothing impossible to him who will try.
-Alexander the Great, homeboy
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from Linda Pastan, "Passover"
5.
Far from Egypt, I have sighted blood,
have heard the throaty mating of frogs.
My city knows vermin, animals loose in hallways,
boils, sickness, hail.
In the suburban gardens
seventeen-year locusts rise
from their heavy beds
in small explosions of sod.
Darkness of newsprint.
My son, my son.
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Saddled Up
You met someone last night
I could hear it in your voice
Or maybe it was the cracked jar
The one where you kept
your confidence
I knew you'd be back, I always knew
That this isn't confidence lost
But confidence misplaced
And now
confidence found
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from Adam Zagajewski, "Houston, 6 P.M."
It’s early evening here, the lamp is lit
and the dark sun swiftly fades.
i’m alone. I read a little, think a little,
listen to a little music.
i’m where there’s friendship,
but no friends, where enchantment
grows without magic,
where the dead laugh.
I’m alone because Europe is sleeping. My love
sleeps in a tall house on the outskirts of Paris.
In Krakow and Paris my friends
wade in the same river of oblivion.
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Truth be told, America's biggest problem right now isn't the economy but its memory.
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Lest we forget
Impossible conception
Fugitive parents
Riff-raff visitors
Podunk hometown
0-star accommodations
Disgraced mother
Disgraced husband
Suburban scandal
Royal enemy
Slaughter of innocent lives
Divine protection
through heavenly tears.
<>
Now hidden behind
cardboard cutouts of fat men in suits
confidential credit card statements
long airport lines
longer highway lines
longest grocery store lines
fighting over plans
loud clanking silverware
louder electric carols
loudest store PAs
people reunited
<>
Heaven asks to remember
Earth commands we forget
Merry Christmas.
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Welcome to solopark
Long held
Long closed
Time to open the doors and
speak.
Joining the digital voices
in their chorus of 1s and 0s.
I cannot promise what you’ll find here
except for one thing:
change.
If you want to remain
In motion by the inertia
of the objects around you
Tapped and propelled by
the cue balls of life
You won't find
comfort here.
All who seek will find.
Welcome to solopark.
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