scribblingredglass
HURTING AND HEALING
Rants, unexplained emotions, thoughts
242 posts
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Make a wish before you reblog ✯✧✫
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I will wait for you till forever falls apart…
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14th March 2024
Will you miss me if am gone? Disappeared out of your life for good? Will you miss holding me? Will you miss us laughing together? Will you miss us hanging out together? Will you miss having me in your arms? Will you miss our talks and little flirty conversations? Will you miss talking to me? Will you miss saying I love you? Will you miss Me…if I am not alive anymore? Will you miss me if my heart stops beating? Will you miss me?
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9th March 2024
Is it bad that my only life goal now is to be yours again? I will do anything, everything and whatever it takes to be yours… you want a rich girlfriend, I will earn. You want a thin girlfriend, I will loose weight.. you give me motivation to work on myself You make me wanna work on my career but if I can’t have you even after everything, what am I gonna do?
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And I fell in love with you a little bit more… ❤️
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21st Feb 2024
Can I get a hug? like a good hug to calm me down, that makes me feel safe and sound, the one that makes me never wanna let go, your warm hands holding me close to you… can I get a hug…please?
My hugsy❤️
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14th February 2024
I will choose you over oxygen, I will choose you over the sun, the moon, the stars and even my own self… happy valentines my love 💌 my beautiful soul, my RG 🫶🏻
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Okay?
if you wake up one day and i’m gone, forget me. i’m not worth it.
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11th February 2024
Maybe not in this life, but maybe in next.. we would be living together, cooking for each other and just being us forever
Maybe not in this life but maybe in next we will get married and have beautiful kids
Maybe not in this life but maybe in next we will snuggle every night and you would be the first person I look when I wake up
Maybe not in this life but maybe in next we will grow old together and still look at each other like we first met
Maybe not in this life but maybe in next I will be just yours and you will be just mine.
I love you my handsome potato and I always will, may it be this life or the next one 🫶🏻
Yours and only yours
Eti
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Just him & I… let’s keep holding hands forever and ever 🫶🏻🍓
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The super plan of killing myself!
I have no idea why I am actually letting this thought out today but I couldn’t control it today so here it is. I have a very special and super plan to kill myself! It comprises of few steps that needs very serious work.
Steps -
1. Setup a self sufficient and functioning business so that my parents can have a part of it and relax in the future.
2. Find poison for my own self
3. Ask him out again… cuz he might say yes and I might have the will to live again too. Plus make sure my dad approves and agrees with me being in love and marrying on my own will. Cuz if that is not happening. I am not staying here - I am running away.
4. Make sure everyone in my life is comfortable like my parents are doing well, my brother is responsible and my RG I want him to be successful.
5. Eat that poison and go to bed - even if it takes 12 hours to work. I won’t be waking up anymore.
If the poison is not the perfect way. Then other one is hanging myself off my terrace grill at night. By the time my family would be up - I would be dead.
Do say RIP if I stop posting here hehe.
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27th January 2024
I thought I was okay… I was supposed to be okay but I am not. I miss him. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t pretend anymore. How am I supposed to be okay? How am I supposed to just pretend… I feel sad, I feel anger, I feel hurt and I also feel love- and it’s all for him. As every tear falls, I miss him. As every tear falls, I would still love him. As every tear falls, I will give him my all. I wish for us to be together again… I hope dad is happy when I am with you. I miss you. Let’s be together again soon ❤️
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Healing a little bit and hurting a little bit too. Things I did today-
Got up and ate- the first thing I did.
Took a warm bath. Needed it so badly
Couldn’t go to gym. Will be better tomorrow in that.
Ate a good but full of fat meal for dinner.
Got my medical certificate for a new diploma I would be doing.
Smiled at my reflection after a real long time - I really need to get my eyebrows & upper lips done xD
Thought of giving up but still kept going.
I was proud of RG today. He scored well
Finished a show - Indian police force
Off to bed we go but still not sleepy. I really wish to be held by him 🐥
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Hi there. Stumbled across your blog while browsing. I know you're probably tired of hearing it, but I wanted to tell you that it'll be alright. I was also once incredibly depressed, heartbroken, and suicidal. I tried to kill myself twice. I had been for years and it felt like it would never end. And sometimes it does poke through when I have bad days. I admit that. But it does even out. New people come into your life and fill the hole that seems endless. And sometimes we do kind of love people forever, but we gotta do it from a distance. And it hurts, but it hurts less over time. You aren't useless, even if people treat you that way. More often than not, when people treat you poorly it's more of a reflection of them than one of you. Life is super shitty sometimes. But there's little glimmers of hope both in the world and yourself. You will be okay one day.
When I first started college, I nearly checked myself into a mental hospital. The only reason I didn't was because I had a final exam the next day. In hindsight, that reason is silly. I did pass the test and I ended up just going back to my dorm. I stayed depressed for a long while. Didn't eat for a couple weeks and lost weight. I had just been dumped and was heartbroken. Now I'm in an apartment, have a lovely new partner and many genuine friends. and life is okay. life is even good.
I don't know your circumstances, and I don't even know you at all, or if you'll ever read this even, but just take it day by day. Give yourself some patience and grace. Growing hurts, no matter what age we're at. But growing pains don't last forever.
It'll all turn out okay :)
- A concerned stranger from Oregon
I am so happy for you and I really hope it gets better, I also hope that the lost love would be back… thank you for sharing and being kind towards me. I hope you do well in life, stranger. Stay blessed always. 💙
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18th Jan 2024
I have accepted that he won’t be mine but I haven’t moved on and maybe I won’t ever… I have accepted that I have been hurt and maybe I will always be hurting, I have accepted that we are not one. But that acceptance will never stop me from loving you, wishing for you or hoping that you will come back soon to me. Maybe I am supposed to cry, scream and still love you with everything I have. I won’t ever stop loving you, I won’t ever stop getting you gifts or just being here for you for as long as I am Alive. I am sorry, I hope for you to come back to me. I hope everything goes in our favour. Hehe.
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