reikives - Tumblr blog

reikives · 9 months

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ugh the cutest ☹️💗

summary: in which you always get what you want and jungkook is dying to kiss you.

> idol!jungkook x f!reader / fluff!! a pinch of angst / word count: 5.5k

> content/warnings: jimin cameo!!, a photobooth, oc gets a little hot & bothered bcs jk is a menace lol (they both are <3), touches a biiit on toxic relationships but this is pure fluff and yearning :p (the ex oc mentions is the same as the one mentioned in the first meeting drabble)

> songs: bad - wave to earth / just like magic - ariana grande

> in which masterlist!

note: just a sweet and silly drabble of jungkook being hopelessly whipped for oc before they even became official *to intensify the seven mv brainrot* no i didn’t plan this 🥲 + hehe this was only a week before the first kiss :p reblogs and feedback are much appreciated !! <3

—

“you really came!”

you run towards jungkook with a wide smile that reaches your eyes. the bag hanging on your shoulder swings and strikes your hip due to your excitement, but you could care less about the clinking of coins when there’s a bright star leaning on a lamp post, smiling back at you.

you stand before him as he straightens himself up, puffs of a fleeting cloud appearing as you pant lightly. “dummy, it’s so late. i told you to go to bed. aren’t you tired?”

“exactly, it’s so late.” he emphasizes your words to scold you, concern dripping from the tone of his soft voice. “of course i had to come.”

he tips his head to the side, sparkling eyes drinking you in as if he didn’t just see you the other night.

“you’re so adorable today.”

“thanks. is it because of this?” you happily scrunch your nose at the compliment, tugging at the strings of the brown knitted ear warmers wrapped around your head.

it is near midnight. drowning in the warmth of his bed to flee the freezing season, jungkook should be comfortably resting at home. however, he just had to look for your name in his contact list despite being absolutely knackered… and somehow he ended up here, because if he has been trading his sleep for work all these years, then he can also trade it any day to spend his midnights with you.

an endeared grin spreads on his face, rosy cheeks numb from the cold. “hm, teddy bear.”

a gust of silence passes by as your inquiring eyes survey the white plastic bag hanging from his hand, the company logo stamped in the middle of it familiar since childhood.

“what’s that? are you sick?”

“me?” he points at himself in confusion, shaking his head. “i’m not, though?”

“then why do you have-”

“ahhh- ah!” his face lights up as he is reminded of the other reason he came to you. he slaps his forehead with a chuckle. “i almost forgot.”

jungkook, although still a little shy around you, tries his best to initiate eye-contact when either one of you speaks to avoid giving off the impression that his mind is someplace else when you’re together. however, the mission becomes difficult when you meet his gaze wide-eyed, and he is… breathless.

“you haven’t been feeling well so… uhm, i got you vitamins and more medicine, just incase. here.”

your heart feels like it’s been wrapped in a cozy blanket meant to thaw the winter that has overstayed its welcome, spreading warmth and giddy sparks all the way to the tips of your fingers. you’re relieved that you wore gloves today; he didn’t get electrified when you took the thoughtful gift from his cold hand.

“really? even vitamins?”

the original plan was only to take a peek, but a word written in bold and colorful letters prompts you to bring out the cough medicine for a better look.

oh, jungkook.

you quickly slide it back inside the bag, a laugh accidentally slipping from your mouth. you press your lips into a thin line to suppress the rest of them bubbling in your chest.

“yah, why are you suddenly laughing? did i buy the wrong one?” he questions, nervous about his suspicions being correct.

he follows up with a matter-of-fact tone.

“you said you only like syrup when you have a cough, because it’s soothing.”

“it’s so sweet that you remembered that but…” you giggle, eyes watering as your body quakes with the intensity of it. the image of the packaging flashes in your mind, and you sniffle. “this is for babies.”

“but syrup is really for kids? are they not?”

his doe eyes are shining not with condescension but genuine innocence, and it makes this a whole lot funnier for you.

“yeah, i mean…” you pause as a puzzling realization washes over you.

oh my god, does this mean that this entire time… he’s been thinking that you gulp down bottles of cherry-flavored cough syrup for two-year-old’s? and he didn’t question that? at all?

“i guess you’re right. but they also have one for adults. i was drinking that.”

“huh, that’s what they gave me. and i just assumed-” he gestures at the medicine you’re grasping in your hands before he freezes.

with the clear view of it, he finally discerns how silly of a mistake he has made.

“i must be out of my mind today!”

he breaks out into a fit of laughter, putting a hand over his aching belly.

it’s a sound that has been evoking an inexplicable joy in you since the first time you heard it; a sound that you often miss lately. you still need to remind yourself not to stare at him for too long, scared that he’d be able to read these thoughts from a simple look at your face.

“still, it’s pink. and i bet that tastes better?”

you nod your head in agreement, pulling out the medicine once more to study the directions of use. “with the dropper and everything, i bet it’s a better experience.”

“shit, it- it even has a dropper?”

“i told you! it’s for babies!”

“babies?! no, no. this isn’t it. this won’t do.” he furiously shakes his head as he waves his hand in disapproval, crossing the distance between you to seize your wrist. “let’s go- come with me. let’s go back to the pharmacy. i’ll exchange it for the right one.”

“nope.” you refuse his demands with a smirk, stubbornly breaking away from his grip. “i don’t want to. i’ll keep this.”

“____, come on!”

“but you already gave it to m- jungkook!” you squeal when he makes a move to steal the item from your hands.

out of reflex, you hide them from him behind yourself. and unsurprisingly, that doesn’t deter jungkook’s endless supply of friskiness. he chases you as he reaches for your back, and you carelessly stumble multiple steps backwards to escape him. whimpering at the unexpected impact, you finally reach a dead-end, trapped between a wall and the boy who’s been making your winter a little less blue. your forehead lands on his chest, defeated, and he keeps you steady with a secure hold of your arms.

a harmony of breathy giggles imbues the silence of the deserted sidewalk.

“what are you even going to do with it? you can’t drink it anyway!”

you lift up your head with a drawn-out whine.

you can’t give him an answer.

to be honest, you’re just as clueless as jungkook is.

“ehhh?” he mimics the sound you made with an amused expression painted on his face. you’re too damn adorable for your own good, and it’s doing very dangerous things to his heart. “will you? are you a baby?”

the rhetorical question is a bait that you choose to bite.

“not really, but i can be your baby.” you shrug, melting him with a coquettish smile.

“ah, i see… is that term of endearment your type? you want to be mine?”

his teasing grin puts his dimples on display, and you desperately want to run back into your apartment just to spend a full minute screaming into your pillow. you’re thoroughly convinced that you’ve never felt more attracted to a person than you are to jungkook. this is bad news. you don’t know to what lengths you’re willing to go so that he could stay in your life for as long as you want. it’s terrifying and exhilarating.

“just to set the record straight, you want me to be yours.”

“and if i do? then what…? are you confident you can handle me?”

every nerve connected to your heart is a wire most alive when you yearn to bare it for another.

“try me.”

his hazy eyes falls to your lips and he goes a little crazier than he was the other night. it’s infuriating that you manage to make them look so soft and so inviting despite the frigid air. it’s dizzying, how his face is only inches away from yours and as always, you smell so sweet, just right. he wonders if you taste the same.

jungkook is dying to kiss you.

the thought has been plaguing his mind, haunting his dreams both day and night. he keeps screaming at himself to just fucking do it, but as much as he is impulsive, he doesn’t want to be the guy who catches you off guard. he doesn’t want you confusing your feelings for him with adrenaline. he wants the moment to feel right. he wants you to see that he’s sincere, and he’s nothing like those bastards who took you for granted…

selfishly, he wants this to be something real, co-existing with the fear of pushing you into a tornado of chaos that is his life.

his heart is pounding violently, he’s afraid it might jump through his sweater. the right moment feels like it could be right now, and he knows you feel it too. he observes your breathing getting heavier, and one of your restless hands has freed itself to grab a fistful of his sleeve.

your lips slightly part, and he doesn’t know if it’s the anticipation, or you did it on purpose to rile him up. he figures his jimin-hyung is right; he would be a fool if he allowed you to slip out of his hands. but truth be told, he’s the one wrapped around your finger.

fuck, fuck, fuck. he is doomed.

a pin drops and he is doomed.

his ringtone rattles the silence and slices through the tension between you. disappointment flashes across your face, and you visibly flinch at its loudness. you’ve grown to despise the incessant noise of telephone calls since moving to your apartment, one of your pet peeves jungkook is yet to hear about. panicked and irritated, he scrambles to dish out the vibrating device from the depth of his pocket.

“it’s… it’s my manager. but it’s fine, i’ll handle it.” he informs you quietly as he rejects the call, opting to send a text explaining his whereabouts.

a pang of guilt shoots through your heart.

“you can go home, it’s okay… i can take care of myself.”

“mhm-hm.” he shakes his head, still busy typing away. then, out of nowhere, he looks at you to properly plead. “don’t send me home yet.”

your eyes flicker to watch a piece of ice fall on his shoulder, white contrasting the black fabric of his jacket. another one lands on your hand, and then your collarbone. the stinging coldness, another thing that makes you flinch tonight. you look up to face the snowfall fiercely coming down, and it seems that the heaven opened up the sky to scold two lovesick teenagers tangled in a modern-day dalliance.

goddamn it, you curse.

“are you kidding me?” you grunt in frustration, eyebrows sharpening your previously dazed eyes.

jungkook barely manages to tap the deliver button before you begin dragging him to the roofed entrance of your apartment building.

“stay here. i’ll just grab an umbrella real quick.”

“okay.”

once he confirms that you’re out of sight, he releases a loud sigh, exasperatedly kicking a non-existent ball on the cemented floor.

“fuck! fuck! why? why do i move so slow? ah- they can’t just kill the mood like that. why-” he squeezes his eyes shut, pinching his nose bridge and putting a hand over his hip, so upset he can’t even speak straight. “we almost… shit, this is driving me insane… she hates me. she must hate me right now. i’m done for.”

—

the aggressive slam of the front door rings throughout your apartment, and you’re about ninety-nine percent certain you disturbed the sleep of a neighbor or two.

“then what?” you grumble to yourself, followed by a desperate cry. “then kiss me! do i really have to do everything myself?”

after grabbing the biggest umbrella you own from the basket you have beside your coat rack, you head to the kitchen where you leave behind what jungkook bought you.

eventually, your overthinking leads you to a bitter conclusion.

“does he not want something more? is he playing with me?!”

and if it was any other person, you’d be fine with that but… your gaze lands on the bottles of vitamins and cough medicine, and you sigh to regulate the accelerated beating of your heart.

“but i think i can finally do this right.”

your voice comes out above a whisper, and the verbal declaration alone fuels the hope in you.

you’re confused whether it’s a sign of luck or childishness. maybe the compensation for being well-acquainted with loss, or good karma if you decide to push it some more… but you always get what you want. despite the blood, sweat, and tears; even during the instances that you do give up, the universe somehow finds a way to arrange matters in your favor.

except you don’t want to give up on this just yet, and you don’t intend to just stand around waiting for the universe work its slow burn magic.

because you look out your bedroom window, and jungkook is squatting on the floor with his head in his hands, looking distraught as if he just lost the lottery and he was only a digit off.

you might be unsure about your label, but he sure wanted to kiss you pinned up against that wall.

—

jungkook casually steals glances from you every now and then. you’ve been softly humming to christmas songs as the ice underneath your feet crunches with every step you take, influenced by the heavy snowfall despite the holidays being long gone.

when you came back, he thought you’d be giving him the cold shoulder, reminiscent of when you got pissed off at a hair stylist not even a week ago (that day, he learned that you’re grumpy when sick, grumpier when jealous). but instead, you lent him a white fuzzy scarf to keep him warm.

“where are we going?” he asks, unaware of your destination.

he’s just been following your lead for the past five minutes or so. he only knows that you’re going someplace that will satisfy your midnight cravings, as you mentioned over the phone earlier.

“i haven’t told you?” you wince. “just mcdonald’s. i’m craving their fries… hmmm, and chocolate sundae.”

“sundae? but you have a cough.”

“i’m all better now! that’s why i’m getting it!” you keen with excitement.

except jungkook is worried. at home and at work, he has many people fussing over him when he’s not feeling well. most of the time, you only have yourself to rely on. he doesn’t like thinking about your past boyfriends, but he hopes that they took care of you when you would get sick. as for the future, he hopes that he’s there.

he perks up when he sees the pharmacy store he’s been thoughtfully scanning both sides of the streets for, recognizing the lightbox signage. “let’s stop here. i’ll buy you your adult syrup.”

“jungkook,” you giggle airily, pulling at his jacket to motion him not to go near it. “i just told you that i’m not sick anymore.”

“it’s better to be prepared.” he reasons.

the snowfall has ceased. he transfers the umbrella to his other side, freeing his hand to hold yours and tug you along with him. he childishly pretends to not hear your protests.

he’s not showing it, but he must be embarrassed about earlier. you can’t help but to smile from ear to ear, watching his back as you’re left a few steps behind, the two of you tied together by his warm and protective grip of your hand.

“jungkook,”

your voice is calmer and quieter. he whips his head back, concerned eyes twinkling from the blaring headlights on the road.

“i’m thirsty.”

—

you’re blissfully unaware of jungkook falling in love with you from the opposite side of the table.

thoroughly engrossed with the movie-like scene outside the glass wall, you’re clutching an apple juice box in both hands, plastic straw stuck between your lips as you take baby sips. he probably sounds like a broken record, but there’s something different in the air tonight, and you’re twice as pretty in his eyes.

“i can sue you for that, you know?”

he drops his phone in shock. he chases it in pure panic as it clashes with the table before tumbling down to his lap. when he puts it down, the screen is already black, a desperate attempt of hiding the raw evidence of his offense. he smiles back at you sheepishly, cheeks and ears flushed after being caught red-handed.

“aren’t i cute? you already made it your lockscreen, haven’t you?” you tease, eyes flickering up to him as you begin stabbing at the chocolate sundae with the little plastic spoon to mix it.

“made what my lockscreen? no, i didn’t!” he strongly denies, holding up his phone to show it to you.

“plain black, really? what happened to gureumie?”

you send him a look of distaste.

“just makes me believe i’m really your lockscreen and you change it to something random before you come see me.” you say in a sing-song voice, shivering with delight after you lick your spoon clean of the sugary treat.

“don’t start. yours is your class schedule!” he retorts with a laugh, which goes up in volume when you slap his hand away for attempting to steal from your fries.

you scowl at him with a displeased pout, dipping a fry into the sundae before popping it in your mouth. “get away. i’m hungrier because you took so long.”

the effect of having your cravings satisfied is instantaneous. it was absolute hell, being sick, albeit it was only a cough accompanied by fatigue. it’s simply no fun being an adult and having no one enter your room every two hours to check up on you. for the first time in the past week, your brain is completely flooded with happy chemicals, and you feel like a little kid kicking their feet with glee.

“it’s not my fault! they had to do something to the ice cream machine… i-i think it stopped working.” jungkook stutters, stuffing his mouth full with a spoonful of his strawberry sundae.

of course, it’s the ice cream machine. it’s always the ice cream machine.

with a gasp, you weakly slam the empty juice box on the table. “wow, i almost didn’t get what i came here for.”

“but you did. ‘cause you’re with your lucky charm.” jungkook cheekily winks at you, and you long to kiss that stupid grin off his face.

—

“holy shit, he’s kneeling down now. kook, he’s begging- look-”

jungkook is convinced he has never seen your eyes this big. he looks at you dumbfoundedly, cheeks full as he chews a huge bite of his burger. you release a sigh, reaching over to turn his face to the side.

outside, just a few feet away at the opposite direction his body is facing, he discovers an angry tear-stained woman sitting on a bench and a man crying on his knees infront of her.

he swallows, tilting his head. huh, so this is what you were watching earlier when you didn’t notice him arrive with the food. funnily enough, this isn’t considered an unusual occurence in such a populated city.

“i knew it. he’s cheating, he’s definitely cheating.” you squint at the scene, shooting daggers in your mind. you rely on muscle memory as you continue to munch and dip your fries in the sundae without bothering to look anymore.

they were still arguing when you gave jungkook your undivided attention, but the shift in the atmosphere captured your interest again when your peripheral vision caught him on the ground.

“how do you know?”

“he panicked and snatched his phone away when she touched it. that’s why they started fighting.”

a sick feeling in your gut deflects your eyes away from the forlorn couple, the salt and the sugar in your food starting to taste bland on your tongue. on the other hand, it seems that it’s jungkook’s turn to be absorbed in them.

“oh, that makes sense.” he mutters under his breath, eyebrows furrowing as he frowns. “seriously, i’ll never understand cheaters. why… would you go out of your way to hurt a person who’s special to you?”

and because of that, his food are left to be unsupervised. with the hopes of resparking your appetite by stealing a taste of something you haven’t had in over a year, you scoop up a small bite of his strawberry sundae.

“that person isn’t special anymore, or maybe they never were in the first place.”

“but if you’re loved by that person, even if you don’t feel the same way anymore, shouldn’t they still be special to you in some ways?”

he returns to his previous position, and the passion written in his eyes like constellations makes you want to believe that maybe the world isn’t a lost cause. it’s a breath of fresh air — the new point of view clear as day infront of you. jungkook is your best friend, it dawns on you then and there.

a best friend who sends you pictures of the sky. a best friend who won’t let you roam the midnight streets with melancholy. a best friend you want to kiss and hold hands with.

“they should, but they’re horny assholes who don’t think about stuff like that.”

“ah, then what a shame.” he chuckles with a scornful shake of his head, finally going back to devouring his burger.

it’s silent for a few beats.

right now, you like the strawberry flavor more than the chocolate. it tastes better than you remember. it’s rekindling an old flame.

“are you that type of boyfriend? who gives out their password?” your voice is rife with interest as you casually steal another spoonful of jungkook’s dessert.

“of course, i don’t mind. i have nothing to hide. i just have the most random photos, and like a thousand voice memos… but… how do i say it?” he pauses to organize his thoughts, eyes pointing towards ceiling. “uhm, it can get uncomfortable, and hurtful… if they always thoroughly check everything. i don’t know…”

“no, i get that. my ex was doubtful of me all the time and it was tiring. giving reassurance is important, but so is having boundaries… never forget that, understand?”

you radiate with so much tenderness, he finds it so easy to listen to every word that you say. but since you already understand the importance of balancing those two things, can he just forget about it and admire your face?

“is that why you broke up with him?”

you pucker your lips in thought, playfully twirling the plastic spoon between your fingers.

“i guess so? he… he just sees me as a bad person. and i was starting to believe that i am.” you decide to put it lightly, scoffing when the mortifying memories of him floods your mind. “when i had that epiphany, i broke up with him right away. we just weren’t good for each other.”

jungkook utters your name, mellow and sweet, like a serenade.

you’re reminded that he sings for a living.

“hmm?”

“i don’t know what happened between you but… when i say you’re a good person, i’m really being sincere.”

during the fall, talking about your past relationship made your heart feel unbearably heavy.

but tonight, it’s winter. jungkook holds out his little spoon to feed you a bite of his strawberry sundae, and you accept it without thinking.

uh-oh.

you peer up to him shyly.

“and because you were so kind to me the first time we met, i don’t mind you being a thief.” he fondly strokes your hair, and you squeeze your eyes shut as your body vibrates with giggles. “aigoo, you eat so well. good job, ____.”

—

“where you are taking me? this isn’t the way home!”

jungkook has an arm around swung over your shoulder, gluing you to his side as you walk together. the last time you checked the time, it was 1:27am. the stores you brush past are already lights off, locked up, and the sidewalk is mostly dead and quiet.

“i really like taking photos, you know?” he grins, sounding thrilled, and you glance at him with suspicion in your eyes.

“i’m very much aware. and so?”

you yawn not long after, leaning some of your weight on him as tiredness seeps into your overused muscles. you’re awfully sleepy, and cold. you can hear your bed calling out your name from kilometers away.

“so we’ll take some together.”

from a distance, you immediately recognize the famous photobooth only several buildings away from the noisy night life of the long rows of bars and nightclubs.

you feel your knees go weaker.

oh, you’re in very serious trouble.

—

curse jeon jungkook.

curse him and his muscular thighs.

“sit here?” he pats his lap as an invitation, looking up to your motionless figure still standing infront of the closed curtain. “or do you want me to stand behind the chair?”

curse him and his intoxicating perfume and his arm wrapped around your waist.

“four photos and… we’ll print… two copies.” he thinks out loud, face so close to yours as he taps on the screen infront.

curse the stupid person who decided to only put one small stool in this small photobooth.

you won’t dare to make it obvious, but your heart is doing somersaults. you realize how arrogant you were for whining about him not kissing you yet, because here you are trying your hardest not to squirm as you’re sat across his lap.

unconsciously, you embrace the scarf he took off close to your chest.

it’s… been quite a long, torturous while of being deprived of physical touch. and you like jungkook. you like jungkook so much that despite hating cramped spaces, you flash the camera a sweet smile while playfully squishing his pouty face in your hand.

“oh, oh, that’s right!”

a yellow lightbulb appears above his head. he bounces his legs to capture your attention, his arms tightening around your waist to prevent you from falling off.

you cross your thighs to subtly squeeze them together, a poor attempt at putting out the fiery tingles spreading throughout your body. you swallow thickly. he needs to fucking sit still. your self-control is running thin.

“act angry at me and i’ll put it as the first picture, okay?”

“huh? why?”

“so i’ll always remember that you got annoyed at me for dragging you here.”

“and i’m still annoyed!” you slap his chest with a frown, glaring at him exactly as he imagined you would.

his mischievous grin stays when he faces the camera, winking and throwing up a peace sign as the flash goes off.

when the timer starts again, he rushes to reach for the floor, sticking his hand in the paper bag from the pharmacy.

“for the next one- stay still-”

you’re completely clueless. your vision remains fixed on him until he reveals a bunch of pink ribbon hairclips on his big palm.

“where did you get these?” you blink at him.

he only shushes you as he removes the earwarmers from your head, thoughtfully fixing your hair before carefully adorning it with the ribbons as fast as he can.

“the ice cream machine wasn’t broken, was it?”

“shhh, we’re running out of time.” he rebukes you to mask his bashfulness, teeth sinking in his bottom lip as he focuses on arranging the ribbons symetrically.

“are these mine?”

“yours.” he confirms absentmindedly. he backs up to inspect his work, but he only ends up thinking to himself is it right for someone to be this beautiful?

the time runs out before you can deem yourself ready. the camera captures jungkook trying to tame your baby hairs, and you, watching him with a faint smile of affection.

“what do we do now?”

he shrugs. “let’s do whatever we want.”

“wow, i can finally do what i want?” you reply sarcastically. “i thought you were prepared for this.”

“three seconds!”

since you’re already smiling in the other two photos, you figure that it’s your turn to pout in the last.

the number ‘1’ appears on the screen, and you feel him pull you closer than you’ve ever been.

curse jeon jungkook.

curse him and his hand on your neck and his soft lips pressed to your cheek.

—

“you’re sneaky.”

“you’re one to talk.” jungkook replies, and you roll your eyes.

he chuckles to himself as he scans his copy of the photostrip under the street lamp beside the photobooth. on the other hand, your back is resting against it, your arms crossed over your chest. you take a fleeting glance at him, secretly smiling to yourself because he looks so happy.

yours is tucked in between the pages of the book inside your bag.

later. you can look at it later when you’re a little more sane and the ghost of his lips stops lingering on your skin.

“i don’t just let myself get kissed for free. don’t you know that?” you heave a dramatic sigh, feigning annoyance. “but since you bought me new clips,”

you turn your cheek to stare at him, but you instantly break the eye contact when you see how he looks like an excited puppy when he’s amused by you.

“…i’ll let this pass.”

“i think i just found the motivation to make more money today.”

you crack up at his words. “shut up!”

god, you’re getting swayed by his antics. he has too much hidden underneath his sleeve. you need to up your game.

a breeze sweeps across the earth, and you sniffle as you stuff your hands in your pockets. it’s getting colder and your battery is draining rapidly as the clock ticks. you die a little inside when you think about the consequences of your late-night adventure. there has to be time for you to squeeze in a nap between school and work, right? right? unbeknownst to you, jungkook takes notice of your weary state. he crosses the distance between you to wrap the ear warmers around your head.

“tsk, you’re going to catch a cold.” he whispers, loosely tying the straps under your chin. he reaches for a ribbon, but then pauses to ask for permission. “do you want to take off these now, so you won’t fall asleep on them? these are kind of sharp.”

“stop taking such good care of me.” you say half-jokingly, starting to remove them on your own. “i might get used to it.”

this upsets jungkook, it seems.

his lips are in a permanent pout as he answers, eyebrows knitting together. “what’s wrong with that?”

you only shake your head with a vague smile.

—

JK :

4:11am

[sent four photos]

credit GCF if you post on insta

got it?

you’re welcome !!!

4:13am

hehe you must be sleeping now right?

you better be !

4:18am

the truth is i’m a bit shy to tell you this in person but ... thank you for being someone i can spend time with comfortably and for always making me smile. i really like you a lot .. i mean that sincerely too

sweet dreams ____ :)

—

“goodnight, jungkook.”

you stood on your toes to kiss his cheek, painstakingly chaste yet sinfully calculated. he was left all alone in the empty hallway of your apartment floor, too stunned to remember and return your scarf.

it is not the first time you did that, but his mind is reeling like crazy tonight — the corner of his lips is still stained with the graze of your lips.

a rhythmic knock snaps him out of the electrifying memory.

“jungkook-ah,” a freshly-awoken jimin raspily croaks out while he rubs his blurry eyes. “did you bring home anything?”

is this becoming a routine now? him visiting at an ungodly hour in the morning; jungkook sitting up without a word to retrieve the snacks from under his bed.

“thank you.”

he receives an appreciative pat on the back before jimin grabs one of the diamond-shaped biscuits you earnestly made a whole tray of, enough to go around for seven people. he nibbles on it as he flops down on the mattress, planning to sleep here some more until it’s time to prepare for work.

however, his drowsiness gets pushed to the back burner when the photostrip beside the maknae’s pillow attracts his attention.

“yo, jungkook! is this from tonight?”

“hyung! be quiet!” jungkook whisper-shouts.

“the staff didn’t mention a photobooth to me. is this a secret?” the late-night visitor whispers back to humor him.

the bed creaks as he chases the printed memories from jimin’s grasp, who seems to have gained enough energy to tease him, heartily giggling as he rolls away to the edge of the bed.

“yah, you’re so cute together?!”

jungkook’s bunny teeth pop out as he’s unable to resist a satisfied beam at the flattering remark. damn right, they do.

pulling out a pillow from behind him, he playfully hits jimin with the huge bundle of cotton. “hyung, finish eating and go back to sleep. we have that thing later, remember?”

“you’re hurting my feelings. what happened to telling your hyung about your crush?”

—

“wait a second- i’m still confused. you sprinted to the fashion boutique before ordering?” jimin flips over to lie down on his stomach, speech muffled by the biscuit between his lips.

“they close at midnight, so i had to run there first.” jungkook explains as he reseals the tupperware. weirdly, he only feels the ache in his body now that he’s talking about it. “she really likes things like that.”

“you’ve told me. so how long do you plan on keeping that in here?”

his gaze lands on the paper bag labelled ‘CHANEL’ on the other side of the room, and he makes a pained expression, still agonizing over whether he should give it to you or not.

“but don’t you think it’s too much? maybe i should save it for her birthday.”

“be honest with me. does she even know you’re courting her?”

—

taglist in the reblogs! send an ask/dm if you want to be added (or removed) :D

—

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reikives · 10 months

Text

I KINDA SUSPECTED BUT YOU CONFIRMING THAT MAKES ME WANT TO CRY ??/?/?

hell is empty - JJK, KTH

life has a tendency to throw things your way when you least expect it, when you’re content, and the ominous presence knows exactly how to steer your existence back into the darkness.

᯽ pairing — drug lord!jungkook x reader, hotel owner!taehyung x reader

᯽ genre — heavy angst, smut, fluff

᯽ word count — 164.4K

᯽ warnings/tags — love triangle au, single parent!reader, dad!JK, ex-boyfriend!JK, CEO!taehyung, strong language, explicit smut, drug use, mentions of violence & blood, harassment, mentions of stalking, toxic relationships, mentions of drowning, happy ending, (will update)

᯽ vibes — the neighbourhood

᯽ updates — every Monday (unless stated otherwise) DO NOT ask about updates. check under the tag #update: hie.

꒰ playlist🎵 yoongi’s visuals ∞ taehyung’s visuals ✦ jungkook’s visuals ★ sora’s visuals ☢︎︎ hie jimin’s visuals ☾ oc’s style ♡ ꒱

→ bits of heaven: drabbles

→ hie: drabbles/asks

tags: #fic: hie #hie: theories #hie: memes #anti sora club #ttmc: hie

ongoing

part 01 - 10K . THE FIRST NIGHT

↳ a small escape from the stress leads you into the arms of a stranger with lots of stories to tell, stories that involve endless touches and caresses, however, the plans you’ve made to never see him again is forgotten; that stranger is your new boss.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ you get me so high by the nbhd

part 02 - 10K . DON’T LOOK

↳ the story of your life is not something you’d like to share, but he finds out eventually and you’re surprised by his reaction, however, an old friend makes a special appearance.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ nervous by the nbhd

ꕤ flashback drabble — fast forward ꕤ

‍ ▹ ─ reflections by the nbhd

part 03 - 6.8K . BABY CAME HOME

↳ you aren’t thrilled to see your old friend, like he’d hoped you would be, and you show him exactly why he is unwelcome in your son’s life, however, he isn’t too happy after he hears the stories that you’ve gathered in his absence.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ baby came home 2/valentines by the nbhd

part 04 - 5.8K . ONLY TOUCHED YOU ONCE

↳ faded white scars seem to split open, but he’s there to stitch them up again. can you withstand each twist of the knife?

‍ ▹ ─ void by the nbhd

part 04.2 - 8K . FEEL THE RUSH

↳ you’ve accepted that the scars will always remain, a little dimmer than before, but are you willing to forget with his help?

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ void by the nbhd

📞 with oc + yoongi

part 05 - 9.8K . LURK #smileysixth

↳ Junho’s birthday party or the perfect cover for illicit affairs?

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ lurk by the nbhd

part 06 - 5K . CRY BABY

↳ you decide that you’re tired of the constant back and forth, there are some things you need to know.

‍ ▹ ─ cry baby by the nbhd

『read this far & still rooting for jk + oc? read this』

part 06.2 - 8.9K . SWEATER WEATHER

↳ a newfound fire begins to sizzle, where the flames from your past now simmer.

‍ ▹ ─ sweater weather by the nbhd

📞 with oc + taehyung (jk + oc)

part 07 - 12.8K . THE BEACH #hie: thebeach

↳ the fire reignites, only to be put out again — and repeat — you have reached an impasse.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ the beach by the nbhd

part 08 - 6.7K . YOUR NAME IN THE RAIN

↳ guilt welcomes you like an old friend.

▹ ─ daddy issues by the nbhd

ꕤ flashback drabble — rewind ꕤ

‍ ▹ ─ dark red by steve lacy

part 09 - 11.1K . SHARING MY HEAD-HEART

↳ conversation, confrontation and…crying.

▹ ─ softcore by the nbhd

part 09.2 - 6.5K . CROSS YOUR MIND

↳ conversation, confrontation and…crying continued.

▹ ─ #icanteven by the nbhd

part 09.3 - 8.7K . SADDERDAZE

↳ more conversation, confrontation and…crying.

▹ ─ sadderdaze by the nbhd

part 10 - 22.8K . PREY #hie: thedinner

↳ the path is free of flames, all you need to do is allow yourself to take that first step.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ prey by the nbhd

part 11 . WIPED OUT

↳ again and again and again, you’re done holding out the flame.

▹ ─ wiped out! by the nbhd

part 12 . I SEE MYSELF IN YOU

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ ?

epilogue

➶ read the sequel ‘heaven’s illusion’ [info]

【 faq 】

when is the next update?

❝every monday, unless i make an announcement stating otherwise. so look out for those :)❞

will hie have alternate endings, choose the ending option?

❝no, hie will only have one, final ending that has been written by me.❞

can i request for hie?

❝not taking requests for hie at the moment !!❞

can i send in theories for hie?

❝of course !! i love hearing them as long as they’re fair towards all the characters. except sora.❞

PLEASE REMEMBER TO BE RESPECTFUL TOWARDS ME & OTHER READERS. let’s keep it fun 🤩

❤️‍🔥taglist ✩ masterlist

#i was so into it 😭😭

3K notes · View notes

reikives · 10 months

Text

just spent the whole day reading this.. man..

hell is empty - JJK, KTH

life has a tendency to throw things your way when you least expect it, when you’re content, and the ominous presence knows exactly how to steer your existence back into the darkness.

᯽ pairing — drug lord!jungkook x reader, hotel owner!taehyung x reader

᯽ genre — heavy angst, smut, fluff

᯽ word count — 164.4K

᯽ vibes — the neighbourhood

᯽ updates — every Monday (unless stated otherwise) DO NOT ask about updates. check under the tag #update: hie.

꒰ playlist🎵 yoongi’s visuals ∞ taehyung’s visuals ✦ jungkook’s visuals ★ sora’s visuals ☢︎︎ hie jimin’s visuals ☾ oc’s style ♡ ꒱

→ bits of heaven: drabbles

→ hie: drabbles/asks

tags: #fic: hie #hie: theories #hie: memes #anti sora club #ttmc: hie

ongoing

part 01 - 10K . THE FIRST NIGHT

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ you get me so high by the nbhd

part 02 - 10K . DON’T LOOK

↳ the story of your life is not something you’d like to share, but he finds out eventually and you’re surprised by his reaction, however, an old friend makes a special appearance.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ nervous by the nbhd

ꕤ flashback drabble — fast forward ꕤ

‍ ▹ ─ reflections by the nbhd

part 03 - 6.8K . BABY CAME HOME

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ baby came home 2/valentines by the nbhd

part 04 - 5.8K . ONLY TOUCHED YOU ONCE

↳ faded white scars seem to split open, but he’s there to stitch them up again. can you withstand each twist of the knife?

‍ ▹ ─ void by the nbhd

part 04.2 - 8K . FEEL THE RUSH

↳ you’ve accepted that the scars will always remain, a little dimmer than before, but are you willing to forget with his help?

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ void by the nbhd

📞 with oc + yoongi

part 05 - 9.8K . LURK #smileysixth

↳ Junho’s birthday party or the perfect cover for illicit affairs?

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ lurk by the nbhd

part 06 - 5K . CRY BABY

↳ you decide that you’re tired of the constant back and forth, there are some things you need to know.

‍ ▹ ─ cry baby by the nbhd

『read this far & still rooting for jk + oc? read this』

part 06.2 - 8.9K . SWEATER WEATHER

↳ a newfound fire begins to sizzle, where the flames from your past now simmer.

‍ ▹ ─ sweater weather by the nbhd

📞 with oc + taehyung (jk + oc)

part 07 - 12.8K . THE BEACH #hie: thebeach

↳ the fire reignites, only to be put out again — and repeat — you have reached an impasse.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ the beach by the nbhd

part 08 - 6.7K . YOUR NAME IN THE RAIN

↳ guilt welcomes you like an old friend.

▹ ─ daddy issues by the nbhd

ꕤ flashback drabble — rewind ꕤ

‍ ▹ ─ dark red by steve lacy

part 09 - 11.1K . SHARING MY HEAD-HEART

↳ conversation, confrontation and…crying.

▹ ─ softcore by the nbhd

part 09.2 - 6.5K . CROSS YOUR MIND

↳ conversation, confrontation and…crying continued.

▹ ─ #icanteven by the nbhd

part 09.3 - 8.7K . SADDERDAZE

↳ more conversation, confrontation and…crying.

▹ ─ sadderdaze by the nbhd

part 10 - 22.8K . PREY #hie: thedinner

↳ the path is free of flames, all you need to do is allow yourself to take that first step.

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ prey by the nbhd

part 11 . WIPED OUT

↳ again and again and again, you’re done holding out the flame.

▹ ─ wiped out! by the nbhd

part 12 . I SEE MYSELF IN YOU

༄moodboard ‍ ▹ ─ ?

epilogue

➶ read the sequel ‘heaven’s illusion’ [info]

【 faq 】

when is the next update?

❝every monday, unless i make an announcement stating otherwise. so look out for those :)❞

will hie have alternate endings, choose the ending option?

❝no, hie will only have one, final ending that has been written by me.❞

can i request for hie?

❝not taking requests for hie at the moment !!❞

can i send in theories for hie?

❝of course !! i love hearing them as long as they’re fair towards all the characters. except sora.❞

PLEASE REMEMBER TO BE RESPECTFUL TOWARDS ME & OTHER READERS. let’s keep it fun 🤩

❤️‍🔥taglist ✩ masterlist

3K notes · View notes

reikives · 10 months

Text

SUGAR | JJK

PAIRING: Boxer Jungkook x Ballerina Reader

GENRE: ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP, BOXIG AU, DANCE AU, FLUFF, SMUT, ANGST

WARNINGS: abusive parents, drugs, Jungkook breaking in 💀, cursing, they're complete opposites, cringe nicknames, annoying fangirl?, reader is so awkward, polar opposites dynamics, emo boy Jk, inexperienced reader

WORDS: 10k

SYNOPSIS:

In a society where Jeon Jungkook epitomizes every parent's worst nightmare thanks to his tattooed body and rebellious personality, he crosses paths with someone who seems to be his exact opposite. Your paths crossing seems unlikely, as if the universe itself had never planned for your destinies to be intertwined. But in between shared late nights and lighthearted teasing. Your sanctuary is love.

A/n: ty to all the anons that sent me reassuring asks while I wrote this, this wouldn't be half as good without your help <3 321go

To say youre utterly drained was the least, today has been an absolute whirlwind of exhaustion. Mrs. Chuu, with her 'great' dedication, pushed you to your limits, demanding three times the effort you usually put in, all because the judges are set to arrive in only two days.

The pressure was on, leaving you in a mess of jittery nerves. Yet, Mrs. Chuu promised you that if you continue with such determination, there's simply no way they won't qualify you.

You find yourself on the brink of collapsing, yearning for a moment of absolute nothing, ready for some sweet sleep when-

"L/n Y/n, what did your father just tell me?" Your mother barges into your room, fury in her eyes as she disregards any sign of knocking.

Your innocent and confused eyes lift from the book you were immersed in up until now, and you hurriedly adjust your glasses sitting up, "Um, Mom, what's wrong?" you ask, unsure of what caused her anger this time.

"Don't act stupid, young lady. Your rebellious behavior has gone too far. You dared to visit that beach again, didn't you?" she shakes her head, her hands firmly planted on her hips, and her gaze piercing into yours.

"One of the housekeepers saw sand on your sandals! Haven't I repeatedly told you to stay away from that place?" she scolds with a loud voice.

"Take this as your final warning, Y/n L/n. I swear, if you don't change your behaviour, I'll ground you until the end of auditions!" She scolds finger pointing at you accusingly.

"oh and one last thing" she says before leaving your room "if you dont pass them, consider yourself grounded for the next year" And with those strict words, she exits your room, leaving you sitting on your bed with wide eyes.

Sighing, you close your book, your mood now down the drain.

You sit in silence, the rhythmic pitter patter of raindrops against the window giving you a strange comfort that your parents never seemed capable of delivering.

Your bottom lip unconsciously pouts, a small tear making its way down your cheek as you walk over to your big window, settling on a soft pillow placed there for moments like these.

Leaning against the windowpane, you look outside, eyes fixed on the darkened streets illuminated by the occasional passing cars.

Living in proximity to the beach meant that your street was relatively quiet, with only a few houses in the area.

Lost in your thoughts, you absentmindedly draw a heart on the foggy window, adding a smiley face because why not?

You bite your lip, as you think about the small kiss you shared with Jungkook yesterday, a swarm of butterflies dancing in your stomach.

There was just something about him that made you feel understood, even though you barely knew each other, you felt a connection to him, a sense of comfort in his presence. He had this crazy ability to perceive when something bothered you, as if internal alarm clocks rang in his mind whenever you felt sad or upset–

Ding

Jungkook🥰: r u up?

Today 11:27 pm

Your eyes widen in surprise as you read his text, and you instinctively remove your glasses, needing to rub your eyes to ensure you're not caught in one of your dreams. It feels almost unreal that just moments ago, you were lost in thoughts of him, and now, here he was; texting you.

You pinch yourself softly, a small gasp escaping your lips as you rub your arm.

With trembling fingers, you type out a response, your heart pounding in your chest. "Jungkook, I can't believe you texted me. I was just thinking about you!" You whisper to yourself, smiling, rereading your text, sending it with a small tap on your phone.

You: Yes, can't sleep 😵‍💫

Today 11:32 pm

Sitting by the window, the storm outside seems to copy the amount of emotions within you.

You never knew a person could make you feel the way Jungkook makes you feel.

Jungkook🥰: cool, look down

Today 11:37

With a heavy heart, you switch off your phone, choosing not to respond to the text from him. Confusion lingers in the air as you gaze out the window, expecting nothing more than the sight of a few trees and the occasional flower. But the universe has other plans in store for you today, as you find yourself locking eyes with none other than Jeon Jungkook himself, leaving you speechless.

"What...?" you whisper shocked, the words escaping your lips almost immediately. Your breath hitches as you carefully open your window, letting a rush of cold air flow in.

In a mix of surprise and concern, you can't help but whisper-yell at him, "What are you doing here? What if my parents see you?"

A mischievous glint dances in Jungkook's eyes as he meets your worried gaze, a playful smirk on his lips.

His presence alone seems to challenge all logic, yet his eyes draw you in, leaving you a giggling mess when you turn away from the window for a second.

Soon enough, another message vibrates through your phone.

Jungkook🥰: you gonna let me in or what?

Today 11:45

Slightly shaking your head at him through the window you pout mouthing "I cant"

But in true Jungkook fashion, his persistence knows no boundaries and without hesitation, he climbs up the towering tree that stands just outside our window, determined to see you tonight. With every passing second, your eyes grow wider until he finally finds himself on your cosy, little balcony now staring at you eye to eye with the biggest grin "Hello sugar, missed me?"

For a moment, you find yourself unable to believe his presence in your room, unable to tear your eyes away from him–Jungkook smirks as he gazes at you in your sweet pink pajamas, with your hair flowing freely and not an ounce of makeup on your face, he can't help but think you look absolutely adorable.

Closing the distance between you, he reaches out to touch your cheek, but you quickly slap his hand away, shaking your head back to reality, your voice filled with panic. "You have to leave," you plead.

"If my mother catches you here, she'll freak out, and I'll never hear the end of it." Desperate to protect yourself and him, vecause you knew your mom wouldn't hesitate to call the cops on him, you push him back towards the balcony.

But Jungkook raises his hands in surrender, a mischievous shine in his eyes. "Hey, hey," he chuckles, striding over to your door and locking it with a quick motion. "See? Problem solved." His carefree attitude only ruffles your feathers as you shake your head with wide eyes.

"No, Jungkook, I'm so serious. You have to leave, like now. This is not a game," you reason, begging he'll understand. However, Jungkook remains unbothered, acting as if hed done this 1000 times before, walking over once more and taking a seat on your bed, just in front of you.

"Calm down, sugar," he teases with a smirk, his hand reaching out to your hip, drawing you closer and giving it a squeeze "The only light on in this entire house is in your room. Your parents are probably fast asleep. Besides, I missed you," he confesses, his tongue plays with his lipring as he stares at you, thumb brushing up and down your side.

You exhale gently, feeling a sense of relief wash over you as you softly place your hand over his bigger one, halting his movements. "You're quite stubborn," you remark, fighting back a smile as you direct your gaze downward.

"And so are you, sugar," he replies with a smirk, rising to his feet and making his way to a small bag he had hidden from you until now.

"Huh?" you tilt your head in confusion. "Snacks? Why?" you inquire, your mouth watering as he unveils a packet of your ALL-time favorite treat—strawberry marshmallows.

"Because you and I," he gestures between the two of you, "are going to hang out tonight." He makes you giggle "You mentioned earlier that you don't have to wake up too early tomorrow, so maybe we can stay up a little longer and talk?" His tone takes a complete 180 from his earlier teasing one.

You bite your lip, contemplating his question. He was right—you had class at noon, not at the ass crack of dawn like always—so technically... ugh, fine, you decide, nodding and settling down on the plush carpet, patting the space in front of you for him to join.

"Wait," you halt him, pointing to his Balenciaga stompers that he often wore when you saw each other. You loved them.

"Take off your shoes first," you demand, a touch of playfull authority in your voice.

"As you wish, ma'am," he chuckles, slipping off his shoes and then taking a seat in front of you, extending a packet of sweets your way. "You're absolutely insufferable, Jeon," you shake your head in playful exasperation, but can't help but savur a bite of the sweet goodness.

"So, what's on your mind?" he asks, taking a bite himself and leaning back, propping himself up with his palms as he raises an eyebrow and fixes his eyes on you.

You shrug carelessly. "Everything's alright, normal," you reply, biting your lip and grabbing another marshmallow.

His dark eyes narrow as he sits up straighter, edging his face closer to yours. "You're lying," he states, a hint of tease in his voice. "I don't know why, but I can always tell when you're lying to me, sugar," he smirks, raising an eyebrow. "Or am I wrong? Are you not lying right now?" His tone eager for you to confess the truth.

You stare at him for a moment, contemplating whether it's worth opening up, but finally, you give in. "My mom found out I've been sneaking out to see you," you admit, watching as his eyes widen in surprise.

But before he can react, you interrupt him, clarifying, "Well, she doesn't know about you specifically. She just knows I've been going out to the beach." You continue explaining, "It's nothing new to her. I used to go there a lot as a kid, and I've only recently started going again."

Disappointment fills your voice as you add, "She scolded me a lot earlier." You bite your lip "I hate when she does that."

Jungkook's gaze softens, his hand gently intertwining with yours. "Y/n," he says, waiting for your attention.

"Y/n," he repeats when you don't immediately respond. "Look at me, sugar," he says tenderly, cradling your face in his hand. "Hey, it's okay," he reassures you. "Your mom... she's not the nicest person, is she?" he asks, causing your eyes to widen.

"Don't-" You start, but Jungkook interrupts, "I'm right, sugar. She's horrible to you in every possible way." He speaks with a raised brow. "You... you're so accustomed to it that you just... take it," he continues, his voice softening "you don't deserve that"

"Can we not talk about this right now?" you ask, fidgeting with your fingers, your eyes pleading for him to replace the topic with something else.

When he nods in understanding, you let out a deep exhale, grateful for the temporary switch "Nice room you've got here," he smirks, glancing around. "It's very... pink," he tries to compliment, earning a playful punch on his chest from you.

"I like it this way," you pout in offense. Jungkook simply nods, a smile playing across his lips as he scans the room and spots your collection of trophies.

"Are those all yours?" he asks, gesturing towards them and you nod proudly, a sparkle in your eyes. "Yeah, they're older though. My parents keep the newer ones downstairs," you explain. "Most of them are from when I was 12," you continue, a sense of nostalgia creeping into your voice. "That's when I was winning most of the competitions," you say, a proud smile spreading across your face.

"Mhm," Jungkook nods, his smile widening. "You must be proud of yourself, then," he asks, turning his gaze back to you.

"I am," you reply, beaming. "But winning... it's nothing special to me anymore. I do it for my parents. If it were up to me..." you look for the right words. "I love ballet, you know," you say, your voice softening. "It's fun, but if it were solely for my own fun, I would do it as a hobby no competitions," you explain. "It can get tiring sometimes," you add, observing Jungkook's attentive expression as he listens carefully.

"Is that why you fought with your mom that day?" Jungkook carefully asks, and you just nod "yeah"

Sighing, you take another piece of candy, observing as Jungkook stands up and approaches your collection of prizes, carefully looking at them. He reads out your full name, "Y/n m/n l/n," and playfully raises an eyebrow at you. "Cute"

You respond with a laugh and walk over to him, grabbing the first trophy you ever won and proudly presenting it to him. It was a small plastic trophy, one that your parents had told you throw away years ago because they considered it worthless.

"I won this when I was only 2," you chuckle, raising the trophy. "Technically, I didn't win it alone; everyone who participated received one. But, yeah," you giggle. "I don't recall much about that day since I was... well, you know... only 2 years old."

"That's really cute," he comments, his eyes twinkling with adorationt. "You should definitely keep it" He lets out a light-hearted laugh, casually brushing his hand through his sleek, black hair, which reveals his mindblowingly beautiful full sleeve of tattoos

"Did that hurt?" you suddenly change the subject, pointing at his arm.

"Did what hurt?" he asks, slightly confused. "Your tattoos," you clarify, gesturing towards the inked up part of his arm. "You have a lot. Did they hurt?" you inquire with curiosity. Jungkook just shrugs. "The first ones, yeah. Now, when I get new ones, it's pretty mild," he explains, his voice casual. "Why? Do you like them?" he teases, a mischievous smirk spreading on his face.

"They're so pretty," you say, your hand hesitating in mid-air as you look at Jungkook with wide, hopeful eyes. "Can I...can I touch them?" you ask, a hint of uncertainty in your voice.

"Go ahead," Jungkook smiles and stretches out his arm, encouraging you.

"They won't feel any different from normal skin, though," he adds, easing your curiosity.

Carefully, fearing you might hurt him, you begin to graze your fingertips over his tattoos.

You gasp ag the closeness between the two of you becomes apparent as you notice your noses almost touching. Feeling a sudden rush of uncertainty, you quickly avert your eyes and clear your throat. Returning to your seat and leaning against your makeup desk to create some distance.

Jungkook follows a moment after, but the silence between you feels off.

"Hey, Jungkook," you finally break the silence, locking eyes with him.

He nods, tilting his head against the wall, his gaze fixed on you.

"Are we... friends?" you ask, your voice laced with awkwardness.

Jungkook sighs, cracking a smile.

"Do you want to be?" He asks, raising an eyebrow with a hint of smugness. "Do you want to be friends with me, sugar?" His question lingers in the air, and as you meet his gaze, your mind races.

Did you want to be friends with Jungkook, or did you desire something more? The memory of your shared kiss resurfaces, adding another layer of uneasiness to your thoughts.

But before you can respond, a sudden, harsh banging on your door interrupts the moment. "Y/n L/n, what are you still doing up?!" Your mom yells through the door.

Startled, you stutter "mom I-" but she cuts you off. "And why are you talking? Is there someone in there with you?!" Desperately, she attempts to open the door, but it remains locked thanks to Jungkook.

Wide-eyed, you turn to him, hastily gathering his stuff and guiding him towards the balcony were he climbed in from.

Panic rises in you as you whisper-yell, "You have to leave."

He begins to protest, his voice filled with confusion. "Why? Let me just hide in your bathroom until your mom leaves. We can-." However, your mother's voice cuts through the air once again. "Y/n L/n, I'm getting the spare keys!" Her determination visible leaving little time for debate or strategic planning.

With a tear of pure stress falling down your cheek, you plead Jungkook, desperation obvious your eyes. "Jungkook, please," you beg, "you dont get it-" gently you push him away. "Leave."

"Jesus, Y/n, calm down," he argues, his voice filled with urgency, as he gently grabs your face, wiping away your tears. "Trust me, okay?" He pleads, his eyes searching for yours. "Let me handle this." And with those words, he swiftly pushes his bag under your bed, his movements quick and easy.

Then walking over to your walk-in closet, giving you a confident wink, before your mother enters the room with the spare key in her hand.

As she steps in, her hands firmly on her hips, your mother scoffs. "You've become quite the rebellious young girl," she shakes her head disapprovingly. "What did I say about staying up past midnight? It'll give you eyebags. No one wants to see a ballerina with eyebags," she scoffs, her gaze sweeping across the room.

"Who were you talking to?" she asks, raising an eyebrow. Your heart races as you whisper, "Myself. I was reading a book and got too into it. I'm sorry. I'll go to bed now." Bowing respectfully, you sit down on your bed, forcing a smile for her. "It won't happen again, I promise."

Your mother gazes at you for a moment longer. But as she sniffs the air, sensing a weird mix of sweat and perfume lingering in the room, panic wells up in you. "It smells like a man in here," she purses her lips.

"I was practicing some of Mrs. Chuus' choreography," you manage to smile slightly. "I promise, Mom, I wasn't doing anything bad." You hold your breath, hoping she'll believe you.

And somehow, against the odds, she does, finally leaving the room after saying "you stress me out so much lately, im gonna get wrinkles", allowing you to breathe out a sigh of relief.

Jungkook's voice broke the silence once he made sure your mom was gone, filling the room with his beautiful deep voice. "Wow, your mom's a witch," he exclaimed, emerging from your closet, in his hands, he held your none other than your beloved Cinderella blanket, a cute memory from your childhood. With an arched brow, he playfully teased you, holding ut up.

Whispering anxiously, you asked, "Did you go through my things?" Your heart raced as you swiftly snatched the blanket, hurriedly throwing it on your bed.

"That blanket is special. Mrs. Lin gave it to me on my 12th birthday when I was little." You couldn't help but explain, pouting.

A gentle chuckle escaped him as speaks, "I see,"

"Listen, sugar, why don't I give you some space for now? How about we meet at the beach tomorrow?" He suggests leaning against your wall he smirks.

As you gather Jungkook's belongings from beneath your bed handing them back to him, you eagerly agree, "Deal."

A warm smile graced Jungkook's face as he replied, "Great." Taking out the package of marshmallows from his bag, handing it to you. "Keep them," he insisted making you smile.

His touch is softer than usual as he lifted your chin with his thumb and index finger. Leaning in, he placed a soft, affectionate kiss on your forehead, leaving your cheeks blushing.

"See ya tomorrow," he murmured, a smirk lingering on his lips. "See you tomorrow, Jungkook." You nodded, your voice barely audible as you whispered.

Jungkook🥰: good night, sugar

Today 1 am

You go to bed smiling that night.

Jungkook found himself back in the boxing ring the very next day, preparing for an upcoming match with a tempting $10,000 cash prize.

"Jk, you're lost in thought, man. What's the issue?" Jungkook's trainer asked, hitting him on the back playfully and ruffling his hair.

"It's that girl he's seeing," Yeji chimed in, the self-proclaimed leader of Jungkook's fan club. She always seemed to be everywhere he was. "Shut the fuck up, Y," Jungkook hissed, his frustration evident. "I don't get pressed over a girl." He shook his head and delivered another powerful punch to the boxing bag.

But Jungkook's coach Bang, couldn't stop teasing him further. "Are you sure? You look like you haven't gotten your dick sucked in ages," he joked, earning himself a sharp glare from the younger one and the vibe in the gym grew shifted tenser as everyone waited for Jungkook's reaction.

"Everyone. Shut the fuck up," Jungkook snapped, his voice filled with irritation. "I didn't come here to fucking talk. If that's what you all want to do, then I'm gonna look for a place that leaves me in peace."

With those words, Jungkook grabbed his gym bag and stormed out of the training facility, leaving his coach, trainer, and fellow boxers stunned and speechless. They watched in disbelief as their star fighter, walked away in the midst of his training.

"Hey Jeon wait up, what about practise-" Bang yells after him

"Fuck practise I need a cig" are Jungkooks final words before ultimately leaving

Meanwhile, outside the gym, Jungkook took deep breaths, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside his head. He knew he had to find a way to regain his focus and concentrate on his training, fuck, why were you on his mind 24/7?

Determining to clear his mind, Jungkook found himself racing through the streets on his harley, seeking solace in the familiarity of the city. Each turn brought him further away from the distractions, and closer to a sense of inner peace.

Eventually, he ended up at the same beach you always hung out at, giving him a sense of peace he yearned for. Jungkook settled on a bench beneath a sprawling tree, its leaves gently falling down with the wind.

"It's that girl he's seeing,"

"Are you sure? You look like you haven't gotten your dick sucked in ages,"

"Fuck man" he groans throwing his helmet into the sand.

As the sun began to set, casting a warm golden glow across the beach, Jungkook closed his eyes and let his mind drift away. The sound of your laughter from yesterday not leaving his mind for a second.

"Stop living in my mind," he groans, shaking his head as if that would make you go away.

"I love ballet, you know,"

"It's fun, but if it were solely for my own fun, I would do it as a hobby no competitions,"

"It can get tiring sometimes,"

Your words echoed through his mind, they played on a continuous loop, tugging at his heartstrings, urging him to figure his own emotions. Why did he care so deeply? After all, you were just a girl, seemingly ordinary in every way. There was no special allure surrounding you, nothing overly sexy that would typically draw him in. Yet, there he sat, burdened with his own emotions.

Jungkook found himself lost in a sea of confusion.

The ocean before him, its waves crashing against the shore with a rhythmic consistency. The breeze, carrying a slight chill, felt like it whispered secrets in his ear, as if urging him to figure out why you'd taken hold of his heart.

"I can't get you out of my head," he murmured softly to himself, the words barely escaping his lips.

Your conversations, though normal, carried an undertone of depth and sincerity that had never caught his interest before you. He'd never talk about the things he talks about with you with other people. It was this simplicity, this unfiltered expression of who you were, that made him fall.

Lost in his mind, Jungkook lets the cool air calm his nerves of seeing you. He wanst this nervous yesterday. But he was more nervous yesterday than the day before that.

With every passing moment, his anticipation grew. The prospect of seeing you again made him happy, its like you were about to become his new addiction.

Glancing at his watch, Jungkook realized that he had approximately 45 more minutes until your arrival. The passing of time sparked an idea in him—a small, maybe cute plan that might give him some solace from the whirlwind of emotions that was his minda.

Jungkook🥰: when r u done with practice?

Today 17:15

He plays with his lipring a second before he sees your reply.

Y/n🐠: in around 15 minutes, why? ☺️

Today 17:15

He smiles at your message, knowing you were probably making the same face as the emoji in front of him.

"I don't recall granting permission for phone usage during my classes," Mrs. Chuu remarks, startling you as she speaks from behind.

Scared, you quickly bow and switch off your phone, swiftly returning to your position, ready to follow her instructions again. Mrs. Chuu nods in acknowledgement, moving back to the centre of the ballet practice room. Through the mirror, her eyes linger on you, "You know, Y/n, I've mentioned my daughter to you before, haven't I?" As she corrects your posture, you nod at her statement while she helps you in stretching your leg.

Curiously, she adds, "Even though she's now 27, I still remember the time when she had her first crush."

Her words make you raise your eyebrows in surprise. "What-"

Sensing your reaction, Mrs. Chuu quickly interrupts, "I wasnt finished yet." Pausing momentarily, she continues, "Lately, it seems like your mind is elsewhere, and I'm almost certain it has something to do with a boy, dear." With a gentle smile, she taps your other leg, prompting to do the same movement.

You find yourself wide-eyed and shocked, realizing that she knew.

Filled with fear, you gaze at her but she reassures you, "Oh, dear, there's no need to worry. Crushes, boys, and first kisses are all part of growing up. It's perfectly normal at your age." Mrs. Chuu carefully examines your posture, adjusting your arm slightly. "Just make sure you're focused when the judges arrive. Have a pleasant remainder of the day. You may now head home," she concludes the class with these words, leaving you breathless. She. knew.

"So, who's this mysterious guy that has you beaming like that, Miss L/n?" Mrs. Chuu asks with genuine curiosity.

As you take a sip of water and catch her staring through the mirror, a smile graces your lips. Swiftly taking off your ballet shoes, you reply, "His name is Jungkook. I met him a few days ago, and he's just... a dream." Letting out a contented sigh, you can't help but wear a smile of pure hapiness, gathering your belongings and sliding your bag over your shoulder.

"Does your mother know?" Mrs. Chuu raises an eyebrow, her expression curious yet stern. Feeling a sudden twinge of nervousness, you gulp and shake your head, basically saying that your mother is not aware of Jungkook's existence at all.

"Good," Mrs. Chuu responds with a reassuring smile, her eyes conveying a shared secret. "I wouldn't want anything slipping past my lips that shouldn't be said. Have a wonderful evening, enjoy your date, and I'll see you at the same time tomorrow." Her parting words leave you confused

As you walk out of the grand ballet building, a sense of bewilderment washes over you. "Wait, how did she know I was going on a date?" you mumble to yourself under your breath, searching for Mr. Lin's car amidst the huge parking spot.

Kicking some rocks and taking another drag of his cigarette, Jungkook strolled along the beach, feeling the salty breeze on his face. The sun was slowly descending by now, casting a warm golden shine over the waves. It was now 6 pm, and as he wandered along the shore, Jungkook couldn't help but let his mind drift to you. You were supposed to arrive any minute now, and a mixture of anticipation and nervousness tugged at his heart.

Smirking mischievously, you watch as Jungkook walks around the beach, shaking your head disapprovingly at his smoking habit, but despite your disapproval, you can't help but find his carefree personality...cute?

With a small smile tugging on your lips, you decide to approach him as quietly as possible, planning to scare him at the perfect moment.

Just as you're about to do so, you let out a playful laugh, causing Jungkook to jump in surprise. "That's revenge for last time," you shrug giggling, unable to resist poking his tummy and feeling a blush creep onto your cheeks when Jungkook doesn't immediately return the laughter.

"Hey, that's not cool," he groans, his gaze shifting from his now soaked shoes, which had lightly hit the water for a moment when he stepped into the ocean, to meet your apologetic wide eyes.

Panic sets in as you realize you might have upset him. "I'm sorry," you quickly apologize, genuine concern clear in your voice. However, before you can fully apologise, Jungkook's teasing smirk reappears, and he swiftly grabs your waist, hoisting you over his shoulder as he carries you towards your usual spot on the beach.

"I was just kidding, sugar. You're so easy to tease," he laughs, finally letting you down gently by the rocks.

He immediately takes off his jacket and places it around your shoulders, his eyes filled with love. "It's gonna get cold," he says softly.

Still pouting, you playfully smack his chest, "You're mean." You pause, crossing your arms and sticking out your lower lip in an exaggerated pout. "Don't do that ever again. I actually thought I upset you for a second," you say, your voice filled with a bit of playful whining.

"You could never upset me. I was just teasing ya"

Leaning into his touch, appreciating the warmth of his hands against your cheeks you reply softly "Okay," your pout fading away. "Just remember, payback is always a possibility, so bettee watch your back," you tease

Jungkook sighs, his eyes sparkling with affection. "I'll keep that in mind," he chuckles. With the sun beginning to set, the two of you settle into your usual spot, enjoying each other's company

"How was practice?" you ask Jungkook, leaning against his shoulder to close your eyes for some much-needed rest.

"I didn't go," he replies with a hint of annoyance in his voice. "I went, but then I left again. My coach was pissing me the fuck off," he sighs, frustration evident in his tone.

Placing his hand on your waist, pulling you closer as if seeking comfort from your embrace.

You giggle softly, your voice filled with affection. "I wish I could do that sometimes. It must have been nice for you, though. You deserve some rest, Jungkook," you say, sincerity in your voice. "You work so hard" you add, looking up into his eyes. In that moment, it feels as if the entire world fades away, leaving just the two of you in your own little bubble.

Clearing his throat, Jungkook looks away, his cheeks tinted with a faint blush. You raise a playful eyebrow, but decide to let it slide for now, focusing on the waves instead.

"So, I was thinking," Jungkook begins, his voice filled with determination. "Since you told me you don't go out much, maybe we should go get some ice cream. There's a place pretty close by," he suggests, nodding in the direction of the place nearby.

You hum in contemplation, genuinely interested. "Is it good? I've never had ice cream before," you confess, feeling a slight wave of embarrassment wash over you.

"You haven't?" Jungkook's eyes widen in surprise and confusion. "How the fuck have you never tried ice cream?" He laughs

A small shrug escapes your shoulders as you reply, unaware by missed opportunities in your life. "Well, I guess you can't crave stuff you haven't tried before. I never had the opportunity to go out with friends and do all that stuff," you explain, your tone carrying a tinge of carelessness.

"Let's change that," Jungkook's determination is obvious as he stands up, pulling you gently to your feet. "You'll love the strawberry flavor," he adds, a warm smile gracing his features as he intertwines his fingers with yours. "Let's go have some fun."

As you walk hand in hand, the warm summer breeze tousles your hair making Jungkook tease you even more. It feels like a perfect evening, made just for the two of you

Arriving at the ice cream parlor, you're greeted by the sweet aroma of freshly made waffle cones and the colorful display of various flavors.

You're amazed by the choices, unable to decide which one to try first.

Jungkook chuckles, amused by your excitement. His hand pulls you closer, squeezing your hip as he speaks "Don't worry. I'll help you choose," he says, stepping up to the counter with a caring glimmer in his eyes.

"We'll have a scoop of strawberry, a scoop of vanilla, and a scoop of marshmallow"

You watch as the employee scoops the ice cream, placing it on the cones with precision. The sight of the creamy swirls mames your mouth water, your anticipation growing with each passing second as you lightly bite your lip.

You watch as Jungkook pays for it, attempting to interject and offer to split the cost, but he insists on treating you. "Don't worry about it, sugar. I like treating you," he teases, a playful glint in his eyes as he hands you the ice cream cone. You can't help but blush feeling a warmth spread through your entire body.

"Woah," you mutter in awe, staring at the huge ice cream before you. The colors of white and pink reflect on your blushing cheeks and unbeknownst to you, a small smile graces Jungkooks face as he snaps a picture on his phone, quickly turning it off and taking your hand, leading you on a cute walk down the street until you reach a little park.

"Try it," he encourages, motioning towards the melting ice cream.

Nodding with excitement, you bring the cone to your lips and take a delicate lick. A delightful hum escapes your lips as the strawberry flavor reaches your tongue. "Wow," you gasp in amazement. "This is so good. Why haven't I had this before?" You pout playfully before taking another eager bite.

Jungkook chuckles at your reaction, "nice you like it," he says, a softness in his voice as he watches you.

"Try it"

And he gladly accepts, taking the ice cream from your hand and a contented smile spreads across his face. "You're right," he agrees. "It's good"

With the ice cream now slightly less melty, you continue your walk through the park, hand in hand.

As you walk, Jungkook leads you to a cute spot beneath a cherry blossom tree.

Taking off his hoodie, he places it on the grass, motioning you to sit on it. "Oh, I don't want to get it dirty, though." You hesitate, but Jungkook is quick to interrupt you. "Come on, I can always wash it."

Nodding you sit beside him, ice cream almost done.

Jungkook's heart races as you scoot closer to him, your proximity making his breath quicken. He watches with adoration as you lick away at your ice cream, your big eyes observing a stray cat that wanders by.

A soft chuckle escapes your mouth, drawing his eyes thoughts back to reality.

"My mom almost took my phone this morning," you laugh, glancing at him. His eyebrows raise in surprise. "Really?"

"But I told her I needed it in case Mrs. Chuu needed me for something," you proudly state, a mischievous twinkle in your eyes. "Look at you, making me a rebel," you tease him, taking the last bites of your ice cream.

"Don't blame me," he jokes defensive "It's not my fault you can't live without me anymore."

You pause, the vibe shifting as your laughter quiets down. "Yeah," you begin, "I mean, I'm much happier ever since I met you. It's nice to go out and not be stuck at home," you confess, "I'm glad I met you, Jungkook. I really am," you say, turning to him with a genuine smile.

However, as your words of appreciation reach Jungkook's ears, his expression turns cold. A frown tugs at your lips, and you're about to ask him what's wrong when he interrupts you, laughing bitterly.

"You just..." he shakes his head, scoffing at himself. "You just don't know what you do to me, Y/n," he says.

Confusion settles in, and you whisper, "What?"

Jungkook stares you down, his gaze intense "I was waiting all day for this," he begins, "I had everything planned," he continues, his words pouring out in a rush.

You're now even more confused, trying to piece everything together "Jungkook, I..." you begin to speak, but he stops you,frustration evident in his tone.

"I was going to ask you about your day, walk by the beach, get you ice cream, kiss you...," he rambles, his words overlapping. "But now I'm just sitting here like an idiot, making heart eyes at you," he scoffs, "It's pathetic."

Silence hangs in the air, and you're left speechless by his confession. Slowly, you reach out, placing a gentle hand on his arm.

"Jungkook, it's not pathetic," you say softly, your voice filled with sincerity. "I appreciate everything you've done for me ever. Your feelings are valid, and you don't have to hide them from me."

He looks at you, his gaze softening as he absorbs your words. The tension between you eases, replaced with understanding. He takes a deep breath, his features relaxing.

"I just really fucking like you" he admits, looking into your eyes.

A shy smile forms on your face as you look down, feeling too many emotions all at once.

"I like you, sugar, and I wanna..." His voice trailed off, a small pleading glint in his eyes as he paused to firmly grasp your chin, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. The touch was firm, his thumb and index finger showing off a hint of dominance, as if he was used to taking control. "And I wanna kiss you so fucking bad right now," he confessed.

You couldn't help but feel a rush of excitement. With closed eyes, you leaned in closer, enjoying the anticipation that hung in the air. The mere thought of submitting to him and kissing him sent shivers down your spine.

"I like you too," you murmured. And with those words hanging in the air, he wasted no time. His lips crashed into yours, it was a passionate and much needed kiss, filled with a hunger. His tongue swept across your lip, demanding entry, and you couldn't resist the temptation.

When you finally broke apart, breathless and slightly out of it, his piercing eyes looked into yours. "I want to be with you," he admitted, his voice husky, his hand, tatted and rough, cupped your blushing cheek, a big contrast to the tenderness it held.

Biting your lip, you met his gaze, you were well aware of his reputation, the dangerous fights he got in. But something about his unapologetic authenticity drew you in.

With a surge of neediness, you nodded, "Yes," you whispered. You were willing to risk it all for a taste of the wild temptation he promised.

A devilish amirk spread across his face, a hint of triumph in his eyes. He knew he had won you over, breaking through your soft skin with his rough edges "Be my girl, then," he smiled.

You met his gaze and nodded. "Yes," you were ready to embrace the chaos and danger that came with being with him.

"Oh fuck" his hand on your face softened even more as looked at you, now all his, kissing your lips once more, as if sealing your relationship.

In that moment, you knew you were diving headfirst into trouble if your parents were to ever find out

But that was a problem future you would have to handle.

Series masterpost

@kooliv @sexymenandcuteanimals101 @tatyhend @idontevenknow75 @dunixxd @saweetspoiled @codeinebelle @telepathytae @faepurity @koobsessed @jooniesxbby @bebejungkook @sxtaep @janedukiesworld @outro-kook @grasstrainerjoonie @ziko @jungshook7 @zerocge @dodoneck @beahonomo @jiimtaee @nervoustyphoonpersona @fan-ati--c @koobsessed @nucleo-bang-tan @sincerelyflora @lil-sracha @sweetonkookieandtae @exactlygreatcoffee @hoseokteardrop @aeonianamour @chaelvrx @genkima @gamer-carat @seokjinspinkslipper @kelsyx33 @loveejkk

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reikives · 1 year

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commissions

commissions will open on december 16 @7am est. three tiers will be available and each tier is worth different cups of coffee depending on the last number of the word count. a cup of coffee on ko-fi is worth three usd in total.

please go to my ko-fi to send in commissions once it opens. as always, you are welcomed to add in tips of coffees (without commissioning).

tier one: 500 to 2k words worth two cups of coffee. amount will total to $6 7 limited slots

tier two: 3k to 5k words worth five cups of coffee. amount will total to $15 5 limited slots

tier three: 6k to 10k words worth ten cups of coffee. amount will total to $30 3 limited slots. you also have the option of paying more than the said amount, the minimum amount being $30 though you aren't required to go outside if you don't wish to

with tier three, it's a more free range, meaning there will always be a chance i may even exceed past 10k words because writing longer works often helps my creative self to open up and expand. all ideas will however always be discussed with the commissioners on my end. i won't write something you don't agree with (same goes with the other two tiers)

you'll be given specific and clear rules when checking out the commissions, however if you have any questions at all, feel free to send in an ask. i will gladly help with any clarifications. i just ask most importantly to please remain patient. writing up commissions is similar to writing requests, though it will be more specific and centered around what the commissioners wish to be written up, therefore it'll take me some more time to get everything up and written.

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reikives · 1 year

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𝓟𝓪𝓼𝓽, 𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽, 𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓮 🔞

(Idol!Yoongi x Ex!Reader)

.｡.:✽It's been years, and the fact that so little has changed hurts him more than anything ever could. Are you still waiting for him?

.｡.:✽Tags: Reignited love AU, Exes to lovers, hurt and comfort, angst, slight Tsundere Yoongi?, romance, adult themes, vanilla smut and it's also not that descriptive, emotional Yoongs

.｡.:✽Story type: Oneshot

.｡.:✽Note: Flashback || Present

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

"Yoongi~!" you whine, happily wiggling your feet while he puts the slightly crumpled plastic bottles he'd filled with hot water underneath your legs. They're safely tucked into a cheap sleeping bag he'd bought a few months ago in preparation for winter- he knows you get cold easy, and you also get sick just as quickly. Yet you never complain, never ask him to do anything he doesn't like, simply happy with being with him. "You're the sweetest boyfriend ever, you know that?" you giggle, while he tucks the blanket around your body with a rather stoic face, shrugging.

"How long did you get time off?" he instead asks, taking off his socks and pants before he slips underneath the blankets as well, next to you.

"Hmm, just tomorrow. That's fine though." you mumble, sleepily, rather cuddling closer to him than anything else. "The restaurant is busy these months, so if I work hard the next few weeks, the tip will be good."

"You should take more time off." Yoongi scolds gently. "You've been working non-stop."

"Well, it pays rent though." you shrug, chuckling. He tenses up next to you- something that doesn't get unnoticed. He's been hard on himself ever since letting you move in to help with rent. The apartment is absolute shit, wallpaper flaking off, neighbours loud and police constantly around, but you don't seem to mind- while Yoongi feels like he's contributing nothing. You've told him that it's fine, that you're glad you can help, that you're happy just to be with him- but he's stubborn. "Yoongi-"

"I'm sorry. Fuck, I-" he sighs. "-I'll make it soon. Promise. Then you won't have to work ever again." he says more or less under his breath, feeling like a broken record that keeps repeating this promise over and over again, before he presses a kiss to the top of your head. It's a small gesture, and it's how he loves you.

Not with words. But with actions.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

It's always the second verse he seems to struggle with.

The first is quick to come to his mind. It builds the theme, the vibe he wants to go for, but the second doesn't flow as easily from his hands. It's like it's mocking him, reminding him that he always starts something just to struggle with seeing it through.

He pushes himself back into his chair, sighing before clicking around to save progress. He won't be getting anywhere today, and he still needs to pack too for the next concert he's got scheduled.

Busan is a pretty place, he's got to agree. Mostly because Daegu just reminds him a lot of his past, and about the bad parts of it. He doesn't hate his hometown, absolutely the opposite- but that doesn't mean that the by now changed scenery isn't still haunted by the remnants of what once was.

The buses still remind him of the days he couldn't afford them. The small food vendors still smell just like when he was younger and holding his mother's hand. The police sirens still sound just as familiar as they did back when he lived in that run-down apartment with his first love.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

At home, he yawns a bit to himself as he packs his hard cased travel bag with things he typically needs for a short trip like this. He's got a habit of packing some items just in case- even though he himself never typically needs it.

But old habits die hard.

"Aish, it's not your fault." he mumbles, inspecting your scraped up forearm. "That guy didn't look where he was going." he just says, before helping you clean it with some water in the tap.

"Neither was I." you try and chuckle, though Yoongi can see you're not at all happy. He sighs, leaving you alone in the bathroom of the cheap hotel room (the cheapest he could find in Seoul during holiday season), searching for something in his backpack. He doesn't even know why he'd packed it in the first place- but he's glad he did.

The dog plushy on the bed is a bit dirty, but nothing he cant brush off. What's worse is the ear that had almost completely been ripped off, floppy fabric only hanging by a thread, stuffing slightly exposed. He sits down at the edge of the bed, opening the small plastic case with the needle and yarn, carefully preparing everything before he gets to work.

You don't want to cry- so you pull yourself together in the bathroom, arm now cleaned and angrily throbbing from all the things you've done to the wound to treat it. In the main room however, there's a sight waiting for you as another proof of his silent love.

Min Yoongi is sewing the cheap dog stuffy he'd won you at the arcade back together.

"Almost done." he simply tells you while working on his task, having noticed you walk in already. "It's not good and the thread is not the right color, but better than nothing.." he simply says quietly, tying the yard before finishing it off. "He- huh?" he asks surprised when you suddenly hug him from behind on the bed.

"You know you can cry about it, right?" he says. "I wont tease you for it."

"I love you." you say, and he smiles a little bit, turning around to show the small stuffed toy to you.

"but it's stupid." you complain, already in tears as you inspect the fixed toy. The red yarn is clearly visible, standing out amongst the rest of the fake fur, but in a way, that's lovely. Because it shows his efforts to repair it for you. It's proof of his love.

"It's not. Come here." he just says, letting you hug him in his lap on the bed. "You're an emotional person. I told you it doesn't bother me." he reminds you.

And so you cry, knowing that he will hold you no matter how big or small the reason for your tears might be.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

His shower is a quick one, he doesn't need to take any longer than necessary.

Even still, it's nice to just let himself exist underneath the water for a moment, just relaxing, taking some time for himself and nothing else. Time doesn't matter in that moment, it's routine, comfortable, predictable. Nothing will happen that he's not experienced before.

He's alone in this home, after all.

It's not often that he's living in this apartment throughout the day, most days rather spent in the studio or in the practice room, busy life keeping him on the tips of his toes. He doesn't mind it, he's chosen it after all, but sometimes he envies the friends and family everyone else around him has. Jungkook and Jin both live with their girlfriends after all, and it's really both admirable and scary to think about. He himself can't imagine going home just to have to deal with another person. He likes being alone.

After all, he's not lonely just because he doesn't enjoy the presence of someone else.

He's quite content with his life at this point. He knows his goals are in reach, is confident in the fact that he's gonna be able to do it just right if he sets his mind to it.

Though sometimes, the loneliness does reach underneath his skin.

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"Are you sure? I don't mind waiting." Yoongi is adamant in making sure that you're not doing anything just because you feel like you have to. You're not obligated to sleep with him. He doesn't need it- he's fine the way you are right now.

"No, I want to.." you say, though now unsure it seems. ".. Except if you don't want to.?" you ask hesitantly, becoming a bit self-conscious now at the prospect of him potentially not wanting you like that.

But he shakes his head.

"Don't think I'm saying this because I don't find your body attractive or some shit. That's not true." he carefully says, reaching out to brush some hair out of your face. "I just want to make sure you don't regret this."

"But it's with you." you say, a shy smile on your lips. "I could never regret any second with you." you tell him, and he takes a moment to look at you, burn the image of you into his mind, before he grins boyishly at you, gummy smile showing his own nervousness about it all as well.

"Ok." he says, moving to lean over you, giggles quickly swallowed by hungry kisses.

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Busan is a lovely place.

You've always loved the sea, and with Haeundae so close to your hotel, it's no wonder you're spending most of your trip at the beach. His face is all over the place, people already camping around to get a chance at seeing the band live. It's endearing to see- to get a glimpse of the great things he's achieved.

People love him now. They look up to him, see him as inspiration, as a role model, as an Idol.

The winds are a little harsh, but that's fine. You're cold, but then again, you're basically always feeling somewhat cold, so you don't find it in yourself to leave and go back to your hotel room just yet.

There's something nice about being alone.

The sea is providing a nice background noise for you, while the lights are dim enough to bask you in shadows. You're not scared, never have been- you don't know when it happened or why it's like this. Maybe you're too carefree. Maybe you should be a little more worried about what might happen.

But you don't want to think about what might. You want to just exist in what is.

Someone is playing the guitar somewhere down the street, faded echo of voice and instrument reaching you just barely. It feels nice like this, clean air and soft sand underneath you still warm from the entire day of sun. The towel keeps it off your clothes, but even if it did reach you, you wouldn't mind.

You close your eyes for a moment. Just a little.

A couple is running by. They're laughing, chasing each other. Friends are running after them, a soju bottle slipping out of a guy's hand, falling and spilling into the sand. The others make a sound of both complaint and laughter, attitude happy and free. You like experiencing moments like these.

You wonder if you'd be the friend who dropped the bottle, or the one to pick it up.

Before walking over to pick it up.

But in this friend group, no one picks it up. It's still there when they all long went their way, green glass sticking out of the sand.

You sigh. Stand up. Dust yourself off.

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You're quiet while he's angry.

There's nothing you could away to make it better anyways, and by now you've learned not to do anything as to help him calm down. It's rough to listen to the way he talks about himself- heartbreaking, but it's also part of being with him.

"It's always like this!" he shakes his head. "I'm a nobody. They'll fuck me over like nothing. Every time." he argues with himself.

You stay quiet.

He's never gotten angry at you, and you hold that dearly. Yoongi isn't one to insult without reason, but he can lash out with glares and words if he feels cornered. He absolutely hates being like this, doesn't want to scare you- and with one look your way, he deflates, visibly.

"Why're you with me?" he asks, quietly, almost scared of the answer you might give.

"Cause I love you." you shrug. Honesty is something he holds highly- it's why he keeps you so close to himself and his heart.

"But is that enough?" he wonders. "Love won't pay bills, or buy a house, or bring you places. Fuck, I want to treat you so good because you deserve it but all I do is run after my own fucking goals while using you." he shakes his head.

"You can use me all you want, Yoongs." you simply say. "Love is giving and taking, after all."

He scoffs, before joining you on the bed, leaning over you.

He rests his forehead on your collarbone. You're warm. Way too warm for him, scolding hot, burning every time he touches you. It's wrong of him to be loved by someone as selfless as you. He hates that you deserve someone way better than him, but that there's probably no one out there ever fit for you. He hates that he can't let you go because he want to keep you close until he himself becomes the one who's worth your time.

"I love you." you say, and he holds you close.

"...love you too." he mumbles almost inaudibly.

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Someone's throwing away trash on the beach.

He enjoys seeing people do little tasks like this to improve their surroundings, even small actions capable of leading to big change in his opinion. However, he does feel a little uncomfortable seeing the young woman alone in a place as bustling as this, as late as it is.

The world isn't a nice place. People aren't nice beings most of the time. Devastation hides around every corner.

At a convenience store, he buys a pack of snacks and a bottle of soju to go with the food he's going to order from room service later in his hotel room. He wants to finish that second verse so badly, it's itching the back of his mind constantly it seems. Paying quietly for his stuff was the plan, until he gets hit by a wave of nostalgia.

And then he spots your face, right in front of him.

He doesn't know who's wearing some weird perfume that might smell just like his old apartment, but it catches him completely off guard. It's not exactly the same, there's an odd freshness to it, but the basic structure is still the same.

A little like cinnamon, artificial sweetness to it, a hint of that floral sensitive fabric softener and very faint cigarette smell.

It's only your side profile as you pay with your card to the young guy behind the counter, but he'd recognize you anywhere. You've grown a little older just like he himself has, but your features are still the same, creating a face that's forever engraved into his mind.

There's no way he could ever forget you.

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"It's fine." you say, though he can see that you're sad. Hell, he's too, but fuck, this could be his chance. "..are they nice? Like, do you feel well there?" you wonder, and he wants to throw up because of course you only care about his wellbeing and not your own feelings in this situation.

"..." he can't find good words, it seems. "I don't know what I should do." he admits, and you laugh.

"You do know. You're just scared." you say, and he despises how well you can read him. "you're wondering if it'll all be worth it in the end."

"what if I throw this all away for nothing?" he asks defeated, unsure if he's gonna like the answer he's gonna get.

"Yoongi, I'm sorry, but look around you. You can only gain, you've got nothing here to loose." you laugh as if joking, but he shakes his head.

"I've got you." he mumbles.

"You'll have me if this fails too." you say, picking up his hand to curl your smaller pinky finger around his, your eyes glossy even in the darkness of your shared bedroom. "I'll be here."

"..promise?" he asks, quietly, almost impossible to hear.

"promise."

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"They demolished the apartments." Yoongi says, sitting next to you on the park bench, drenched in darkness. "Don't know when. Saw it beginning of this year."

You nod. "They took them down Last year november I believe. Something about the structure being unstable." you explain, licking your fingers as you eat your cold meal.

"It's always been unstable in my opinion. Remember the huge cracks on the balcony?" he chuckles, and you laugh along.

"Oh god yeah. You basically banned me from ever going out on there because you were convinced it would just snap off and fall down at any moment." you joke. Your voice hasn't changed much at all. He still can't help but cling to every word that leaves your lips.

Fuck, he's falling for you all over again.

"Hm but I still got that picture I took from our first date." you tease, and he cringes.

"Aish, come on, that's embarrassing." he complains, though you shake your head.

"It's not! The table was a cardboard box and the meal was pizza I think. I thought it was sweet." you say, and he rolls his eyes a little.

"You thought a lot of the things I did were sweet." he reminds you, and you nod.

"That's cause they were." you tell him, finishing your meal.

"Well, I can afford a table now." he reminds you, carefully stepping around, feeling the boundaries and searching for any potential hurdle in his mission to get closer to you again. "And good food."

"hm, I can imagine." you say. "life's been treating you well. I'm glad." you explain, looking at him, and he can't stand your warm gaze on him like that.

You're yet again burning him, and he's not even touching you.

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"I don't want to go." he says quietly, packed bags at his feet. "Fuck, I can't do this."

"You're not turning this chance down." you tell him, trying hard to keep yourself composed. "Yoongi, you're talented. And not just something out of the ordinary- you're one of a kind." you say, holding onto his shoulders. "Please. We talked about this."

He nods, quietly, before picking up the bags. He hates that he can't hug you. Can't kiss you goodbye. Can't even look at you. He feels awful, wave of regret ready hitting him the moment he steps outside the door of your shared apartment.

Or, now more or less your apartment.

And it gets worse the moment he's at the dorms he's gonna live in for the next few years, as soon as he opens the bags you'd packed for him. His clothes are so neatly folded, still smelling like you, and home, and you even packed your laptop with a sticky note telling him to use it well and fuck. He already misses you, already feels horrible for doing what he's done.

But then he picks himself up with newfound determination, folding the note and putting it into his wallet.

He will use it well.

He will make it big.

All while you're at the apartment, crying alone, for the first time in years no one there to hold your shaking body.

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"That's gonna be the most expensive bed I'll fuck you in." He breathes out, earning a slap to the chest and a laugh from you before he continues his attack on your neck. You've got no chance to really look at his way more expensive hotel suite, too busy with his knee between your legs and his hands unbuttoning your coat as if he's got time to loose.

"way to- be romantic, Yoongs.!" you giggle, and he grins against your skin, coat falling helplessly down to the floor. "Yoongi!" you scold playfully when his cold hands grab at your bare skin underneath your sweater.

"No." he shakes his head. "Don't call me that. I've missed that stupid nickname you gave me way too much." he says, letting you pull his own sweatshirt over his head the T-Shirt he's got underneath easily going along.

"Yoongs?" you tease. "Baby?" you go on, eyes closed by now, just experiencing the moment back in his presence. "Bestest Boyfriend?" you laugh when he picks you up and brings you to the bed.

"All of them, don't fucking care." he answers, pulling your sweater from your skin and over your head. "As long as it's you who calls me that." his deep voice says, and it's a reminder of how much time has passed.

And for a moment, time stops, as you both just stare at each other.

"I missed you." you say, smiling tearfully. Fuck.

He tears up himself. Busies himself with kissing you instead, mind and soul and body hungry for anything you're willing to give.

You don't need him to say anything. Even after those years you know him well enough to realize that he's talking with actions when words fail him. Just like he does now, with the way his hands start to gain courage and confidence again, finding old territory in a new light again, so to say.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, after all.

And finally, as your soft breaths and desperate whimpers find his ears, he realizes that this is now, not then. This is his past, present, and future meeting. This isn't just some random memory his brain has spun into a dream that haunts him with the fact that he'd given this up for fame and money.

No, this is a promise being kept.

It's him going back to free laughter and carefree smiles when you roll on his big twin-sized bed while he searches for a random condom that's buried in his suitcase deep down. "heh, well prepared for a man with fame." you joke, though he shakes his head at you when he joins you again.

"Never had time nor really any craving for someone else." he shrugs, though he somewhere deep down wants to know what it's been like for you. If there's been others while he's been busy touring and writing songs. Surely, a girl with your looks and personality-

"Had the time, not gonna lie." you say, before your finger traces a beauty mark on his bare leg. "but no one was you." you mumble.

He stares at you.

"You don't have to lie, you know." he tells you. "don't be mad or anything. You know me."

"hmm." you say. "that's why I couldn't be with anybody else." you say, staring at nothing at all for a moment. He leans over, kisses you more tenderly now, less urgency in his actions.

"you're still way too fucking nice." he playfully complains, before laughing when you roll your eyes.

"And you swear too much!" you say, making him raise his brows.

"Maybe I should start putting my dick in, let's see who's swearing then, huh?" he challenges, and you laugh with a scandalized expression.

"yeah well maybe, I'm aging fifty years fown here old man!" you giggle, making him click his tongue.

You might not be aware of it, but this is the most at ease he's been in years. There's no time, no hurry, no urgency and no real reason behind anything he does. He just acts on simole thoughts, on his desperation for you, and mostly, his love.

He cast help but love you just as much as he did years prior. Or.. No.

He loves you more. Definitely.

You hold onto him with every thrust of his hips, needing him close, closer, even closer than he already is. His lips on yours steal your breath away, but you don't mind suffocating if it's due to his affection. You know he will make you come alive again with a simple touch, you know he's never going to let you fly away from his grasp.

He never did, after all.

The moment after your climax feels like all emotions crash onto you like the waves did back at the beach. They're just as loud, as heavy and cold but beautiful the same, and you can't help but cry, sob, move your hands to shield your eyes and let yourself feel all of the years of longing for one last time.

But this time, you don't cry alone anymore.

Tonight, he holds you again, keeps you close, and makes sure that from now on, he's back at your side. He's become the man who's worth your time.

Worth your love.

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reikives · 2 years

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so it begins // jjk

things untold; a collection of fleeting moments

#1 ! the one where it’s all about what oc wants

navi | m. list | ask me ! | add yourself to my taglist !

pairing: jungkook + oc

au/genre: friends to lovers ?? uni au, fluff, a sad attempt at a tsundere jungkook + warm/oblivious,, jungkook’s feelings for oc ✨b e g i n ✨ and i wanna say it’s like a meet cute moment but idk it’s not rlly but it kind of is? LOL i wrote diz at 4am pls bare w me ,,

warnings: a cute ass time, feelings feelings feelings! ,, boyfriend jungkook cravings, oc is wearing a skirt nd jungkook goes thru a brain fart cuz 🗣 sitting on lap, idk bro this is highkey an appreciation post for JUNGKOOKS TATTOOS c:

wc: 800

note: ty to @ssaltytears for helping me pick the cover huhuhuhuuu <3

“Can I colour in your tattoos?”

Your request is nothing new. Yet, given the amount of times he fails to say no to you, Jungkook looks at you completely in awe. Putting his Apple pen down, he crosses his arms the moment you push your textbook away to reach out to him.

“Please?” you beg, wide-eyed and hopeful. He shakes his head at you and you immediately pout at his sternness.

You sulk.

“Okay, how about this? I promise I won’t ask for a study break for at least another hour if you let me.. I’ll even proofread your paper even though you know I have the attention span of a goldfish.”

His heart clenches at the sound of your determination. Your proposal may be dismissed by other but not to him. See, Jungkook believes you’re inherently blessed with editing skills. Every once in a while, you’d edit his papers and he’d receive full marks—he’d be a dummy to pass this limited service up.

Yet, it’s not about what he gains from you; it’s about how he can make you happy.

You take Jungkook’s eye roll and defeated sigh as a win, instantly opening the marker cap and waving it in front of him. As Jungkook rolls up his sleeves, you squeal in excitement. He lays his arm on the table for you and you groan at the position.

“Wait,” you pause, getting up from your seat and standing by his side. Jungkook leans his head back, looking up at you confused.

“Can I sit on your lap?” your request makes his heart race.

Jungkook is utterly dumbfounded.

Keep reading

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reikives · 2 years

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many moons | jjk

summary: your father sets off to find a way to get you the moon, not realizing he has already given it to you.

> royalguard!jk x princess!reader

> fluff, angst a bit, slightly suggestive / wc: 11.2k

> warnings: brings up death but we r good dw, kisses nd making out, hickeys, they’re jus two lovers in love <3 :] + jk nose appreciation . this is rlly self indulgent fluff i think

note: hello. LOOK AT JUNGKOOK HE IS SO DREAMY OH MYGOD moving on this idea jus came to me very randomly 😭 this is based from the little fairytale many moons by james thurber <3 obv i changed a lot of things but the gist of the story is there mostly in first ¼ hehe :] that’s all . lmk what u think ^__^

—

“my daughter, tell me what i must do for you to be healed from your illness. i will do absolutely anything to bring back my lively daughter who used to live in the garden. my sweet, sweet daughter who loved the children and was adored by the townspeople.” your father weeps pitifully, kneeling on the floor beside your king-sized bed. his hands hold one of yours in a tight grip, scared that you might disappear out of thin air if he was to let go.

he has called all the doctors within your ruling, and even kingdoms from far and wide. he has tried all forms of entertainment. magic, theater, and the arts. he resorted to allowing spells to be casted upon you, but you only grew sicker as the days passed. the bright light in your eyes your father once adored, the only source of inspiration and motivation in his life, has died out. you are his only family left. his most precious treasure. and he would do anything in power as the king to give you a joyful and comfortable life.

you stay quiet the entire time he cries out, your eyes looking far, far away. several royal guards stand on the grounds below your balcony as you wished your father to let you open the door and keep the curtains drawn, providing extra security for you to gaze at the moon longingly every night. the moon, your very best friend. the moon, who watches over you and smiles when you try to catch it in the palm of your hand. the moon, who changes in shape, gradually, from crescent to full - giving you hope that someday soon, you will become full once again. the moon, who you want to take with you everywhere you go.

“i will get you anything your heart desires.” the king says. “is there anything your heart desires?”

“father, the moon.” your voice soft, but weak. “bring me the moon, and i will be healed.”

the king perks up upon hearing your voice. you barely speak these days (it makes the pain worse), therefore it’s a delight for him in the rare occasions that you do. you make it count, he thinks to himself as you’ve given him a glimmer of hope in the brink of him giving up.

he stands up and dusts his knees, fixing his clothes to make himself look presentable again. and because he has many great wise men who have always gotten him everything he asks for, “then, my child, the moon you shall have.”

Keep reading

#bts royalty au #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #fic rec

2K notes · View notes

reikives · 2 years

Text

AHH <33 I don't think I can stress enough how much I adore minnie's works and that cmar is definitely one of my absolute favorites from her! Her style of writing is just beautiful,, it really tickles my brain to read her works. The angst from these series have made me cry a handful of nights but its really worth it. Many times I've sent some messages to her inbox in anon to praise her but I finally have the guts to do it .. non-anon-ly (?) so here we are.

I just want to say your mind is absolutely amazing, every after reading a chapter I always try to think about the next chapter, I try to predict what would happen next but it always comes out better than I have imagined. I hope in the future you keep writing and that you will have success in the literary world, I would absolutely love to see you and your works appreciated by everyone.

Your works really inspire me to write too but I don't have a mind like yours nor can I write as beautifully as you so I'll just read from the sideline ! hehe

You're doing well Minnie !!! Keep up the good work and don't forget to get some rest and tread lightly!

cry me a river | the cruel and the fool

— summary: nothing hurts more than trying your absolute best and still not being good enough

— pairing: bts x reader

— genre: angst, mafia!au

— word count: 8.8k

— warnings: a brief moment y/n almost has her ptsd triggered — brief mention of leehyun, toxic thoughts/acts [[ to anyone who might be afraid/cautious of reading this chapter, to be honest i don't think this chapter is too bad as compared to a few previous chapters, namjoon doesn't actively trigger y/n's ptsd of leehyun, but if you don't wish to read this chapter (or any other chapters for reasons), you can always send me an ask and i will gladly explain what's going on in hopes of not wanting to miss anything ]]

— PART 15 / previous post / masterpost

“Y/N?”

You look up with a startle, taking in a sharp intake that forces you to flinch, and when you turn around at the familiar calling of your name, you have to take a moment to compose yourself so that you don’t instinctively take a step back at the man before you.

Mingyu stands steady on his feet and you almost crumble at the fact that he called you Y/N and not boss because boss means you’re okay, you’re fine, you can take everything that’s coming at you, you can control it, control everything. But Y/N means you can’t. You’re not fine, you’re falling into disorder and you’re ruining yourself.

Y/N means you’re losing control.

As if he understands just how much the effect of his word has caused you, Mingyu steps up from where he stood, keeping a good distance between the two of you and you hate the fact that today he hesitates to come to you.

There are days when you feel guilty for scaring them, for forcing them to abide by all that you are, to accommodate your needs, and forcing their way of thinking to quickly act just because you’re weak and you can’t do anything by yourself. There are days when you hate yourself more than you do on normal days, when you can see it in your Reapers’ expressions just how concerned they are.

They never look at you as if you are a monster, as if you’re some insignificant robot built up by your father in the same way everyone looks at you. They don’t look at you as if you’re just a puppet who holds no feelings, as if anyone and everyone can do anything and everything to you and you won’t hurt.

They know you hurt.

They know you hurt more than anyone.

Even in this room in a building filled with people who only want what’s best for you, you feel yourself trembling as you hold everything in, unable to scream, to cry for help, because all your life you’ve been shown that calling out gives you nothing in return. Even as you know your Reapers would never do such a thing to you, even as you know more than anyone that they’d come to you in a split second were you to utter the simple whisper of “help,” you don’t dare to.

You’re scared.

Scared.

So you tremble as you hold in the cry, falling completely silent, and it breaks you to do so.

“Y/N.” Mingyu calls again with a little more warmth, with a bit more comfort, and filled with a little less anxiety and fear. He calls you softly, a gentle expression plastered on his face when you look up with another startle, the serene on his features shocking you a bit.

He calls your name with care and if you knew how to cry, perhaps you’d be bawling your eyes out like a newborn baby, letting your tears out uncontrollably without a care in the world because you know there will be people who will do all that they can to ease your heart once again.

He calls you with such a tender gentleness it reminds you of the way Mister Butler used to call for you, the way Hoseok called for you.

Mingyu, Mister Butler, and Hoseok, all three different souls built in the same egg; the shell, the egg white, and the yolk.

Mister Butler was your protection, the very one who kept your innocence safe, the very one who held onto your hopes and dreams, keeping them safe in the warmth of his arms. When he left, you lost all of that; your innocence, hopes, and dreams. Years later Hoseok took his place, providing you with love. He gave you the happiness you sought for when you were with Mister Butler, a promise the two of you made with the linking of your pinkies. Mister Butler was the first to break his promise and you broke it soon after, leaving Hoseok who kept your love in the warmth of his arms, losing your love and happiness.

Then came Mingyu walking into the picture. You aren’t sure how it happened, when you began seeking out for the warmth of his arms, but perhaps it was always there, like how it was just meant to be in the same way it was natural to rely on Mister Butler and Hoseok’s warmth.

When he sees you shaking uncontrollably but keeping your silence and peace, Mingyu simply opens his arms as if saying; “It’s okay. You can come to me when you’re scared. I know you’re scared.”

And it reminds you of the way you used to go to Hoseok. He was always the first person you sought out whenever something frightful had shaken your core and you couldn’t handle things by yourself. It was always Hoseok.

When you let yourself go to Mingyu, when he engulfs you in his arms and when you lean into his chest, ears pressed against the resounding beat of his heart, you allow your mind to rest as you let your eyes flutter closed, legs giving in as he holds you on the floor in the middle of the living room.

This is your foundation. Your calm, your control.

This is your Mingyu.

When it finally comes to the day he leaves your life, you wonder how that will be. Will he leave you in the same way Mister Butler left you? Or will you leave him in the same way you left Hoseok? Both of them were out of your control, and both of them you were forced to cut ties with. You wonder if one day Mingyu will grow tired of you or if one day his loyalty will take him too far and he’ll die for you.

You don’t want him to leave. Not now, not ever.

If he leaves, who will you have? He’s your last one, the very person who’s holding onto your breaking pieces so you don’t completely crumble. Mister Butler was your protection, Hoseok was your love, and Mingyu is your foundation.

You don’t want to lose another one, another solace. You don’t want to lose your last one. Because you know after Mingyu, there will be no one left to take care of you in the way the three of them had. If you lose him you think it’ll probably be the last of your control. If you lose your Reapers, you know you won’t ever be able to pick yourself up again.

They can’t save you in the same way you’ve saved them but still, you’ve come to rely on them in more than one way. They’re the only ones keeping you afloat in this deep, deep sea. The only ones keeping your broken pieces together.

“Something’s wrong,” you whisper into the silence after a long, long time. “...I can feel it. There’s another storm coming, Mingyu.” You’re limp against his chest, body unable to keep its strength up just like all those other times when you lay against him. Perhaps you’re hurting him with your weight, perhaps his body’s cramping up in some ways but Mingyu doesn’t dare move. “I don’t want it to come.”

He knows you’re scared, he can feel it.

“What would you like us to do?” He asks, softly, in order to keep you sane, to have control over your situation in just the slightest bit when it feels like everything is falling apart. He lets you regain control for a moment, just like the building foundation that he is.

“...Stay,” you say. “Just…stay.”

And so he remains there for another hour longer to help you breathe a little easier, to help ease your heart, to calm the storm that had risen against your chest. It is only when Yeonjun comes in do you finally separate.

“I have your tea ready, boss,” he says when he walks in.

You’re weak and unable to walk on your own, body barely even able to step away from Mingyu so the two of them help you get off him. Yeonjun takes over the base, becoming the stepping stool that you need. He takes you in his arms while you make no protest, head turned to lay against him like a rag doll who holds no strength left in her body.

And when the young genius takes you out the door on his own, Dasom emerges to have a look into the living room, her face blank as she takes in the figure who remains seated on the floor, eyes looking lost in thoughts.

“Is your heartbeat that calming?” She asks into the silence, breaking Mingyu out of his daze as he looks up with a calm expression. “Boss always calms down the second she hears your heartbeat. Makes me wonder if you ever have moments when you aren’t calm and your anxiety takes precedence.”

He chuckles lightly, a rueful smile curling along his lips. “If I ever let the situations get the best of me, I’d lose my role as her foundation, and then what would happen? Have her suffer even more without being allowed a moment of calm?” He looks at her with furrowed brows, hand balling into a fist. “If I ever allow myself to become weak, I’d hurt her and that’s the one thing we cannot ever allow to happen. Y/N needs her moment of peace. Even if that moment lasts for just one second, if I can’t be her calm among the storm…she’d break.”

“But then what about you?” Dasom asks, her features marked with concern for someone else other than you, and Mingyu realizes it’s probably the first time she’s ever allowing her worries to show so openly.

“It doesn’t matter.” He picks himself off from the floor, averting his gaze as if avoiding his emotions. “As long as I’m alive, I live as her foundation. If I can’t do my job well, there’s no point in any of this.” As he walks by to leave, Mingyu takes a moment to pause beside her, putting a hand on the blade of her shoulder. “Even if we can’t save her, we can still give her room to breathe. If I ever rip that calm away from her…I’d never be able to live with myself.”

He walks away before Dasom can say anything else.

A blue vintage corset with a pretty white skirt that flows all the way to your ankles, accompanied by a matching blazer draped over your shoulders while your hair stays up by a white claw clip, you walk down the hall of the art museum all on your own, paying close attention to every painting presented on the wall at each of your sides.

You keep your eyes keen and open with arms crossed against your chest while your heels click from underneath you. All the guests in the building are common innocents who’re here simply for their own pleasures. You’re here for a different reason.

“..Miss?”

Your heels stop clicking at the call of the hesitant voice behind you, already falling on your guard, and when you slowly turn around at the person, you find a young man you aren’t too familiar with.

“I apologize, you looked vaguely famil…” Your eyes narrow his way as he trails off as if trying to put an image to his memories, just before something in him clicks when his eyes widen. “Are you..the Reaper?” You keep your expression unreadable, remaining blank, and when it looks like you won’t answer his question, he goes to speak some more. “The scythe earrings,” he says, pointing at the silver dangles on each of your ears, “you..killed my uncle.”

Huh.

“So what? Looking for a chance to kill me now, are you?”

“No!” He quickly says and you fix your gaze towards the side at his sudden outburst, knowing the bystanders have just heard and have been alerted. Upon that, the man clears his throat awkwardly before continuing in a lower tone. “I just meant…I know my uncle was a bad man.”

“...Do you?” As you say that, a familiar figure catches the corner of your eyes and when you go on to focus your attention a bit more on them from behind the stranger’s shoulder, you feel your expression falling when you realize it’s Namjoon and Jimin.

If Namjoon and Jimin are here, the others shouldn’t be too far away. And that only means trouble.

You’re on your feet again, taking a turn opposite of where they are as you continue on your walk.

“It’s best to not associate yourself with me. If you offend me whether on accident or on purpose, I will rid of you without hesitation.”

“W-wait! I just..-” He runs to catch up to your pace, frantic looking.

You stare at him up and down before sighing. “You’re wasting my time. Seeing as the insignificant man I killed is your uncle, I implore you to heed my advice and not show your face to me ever again. I do hate to be reminded of the memories of the past. They don’t serve well for the future.”

“I apologize, it’s just…I’m glad to have seen you in person, Miss Y/N. The rumors do you no justice, you’re more beautiful than they imply.” You don’t like the smile he shows you. “If you could be so kind, I would love to invite you to—”

“I told you, sir, I do not like to be reminded of the past.” You turn your face from him, walking sped up this time but he remains stubborn.

“I understand.” He doesn’t if he keeps following you insistently. “Being in the same room with you alone is a blessing, I’ll be sure to watch you from afar if fate ever allows us the moment again.” What a creep. “Ah, but what’re you doing here at an art museum? Are you here for your next target? Who is it?”

“It’ll be you if you don’t stop bothering me.”

He laughs as if you just said a joke. “My extended family would certainly have a heart attack if that were to happen, being as you’ve already gone and rid of my uncle. But truth be told, I’d be lucky to have the new Reaper kill me by her own hands.”

“Would you?”

“Of course! To have your beautiful hands—”

You stop in track all of a sudden, putting a hand up to have him freeze in place when he tries to reach out for you. “Sir.” Your voice drops deep, a frosty chill walking in as you stare him down from the side eyes. “If you really don’t wish to lose your life over some petty incident, I advise you to leave me now before you really make me angry. I’d hate making a scene in front of innocents but if you lay even the slightest touch on me, I’d do the same I did to your uncle and perhaps even worst.”

“...” He falls silent at your words and just as you think he’s finally done and realize the truth behind your threat, he speaks again as you’re about to walk away. “Who knew such a lady with refined beauty could get angry so easily.” He scoffs lightly, mocking you as his mask falls away. “You may be beautiful but your heart needs to be worked on. I bet my uncle didn’t even do much to have him face your wrath.”

“What your uncle did to me is none of your concern.”

“You must have killed your father for the same purpose, huh? I heard he cared for you quite deeply yet you returned his kindness by killing him. What a spoiled little brat.”

They don’t know your story and they never will, but that doesn’t phase you one bit because everyone is just like him; dumb and stupid, always believing the other side of the story without truly looking into things. Not that you care, they can think however they’d like, it doesn’t concern you.

You’re still going to kill the ones that did you wrong.

You ignore the man’s comment to keep walking, not wanting to stop this time no matter what but when you feel his presence once more with the way he comes at you at an alarming pace, you grab the white silk that was wrapped around your waist and played as a belt for your skirt, untangling the decorated bow and in a swift manner, you wrap the silk a few times around the man’s wrists, forcing it behind him in a rushed and assertive act that has him quick to scream at the pain.

You can feel a light tremble in your hands, the PTSD from Leehyun still here, so you make sure you aren’t touching him in the slightest, and when his scream alarms the people around you, you keep your cool as you stare down at the man, strengthening the tight grip of the silk with no mercy.

“You’re all the same. This is why I hate men.”

“Y/N?”

You sigh inwardly to yourself upon attracting the attention of Namjoon and Jimin and clench your jaw at the onlookers showing concern and worry.

“Are you alright ma’am?”

“Was he bothering you?”

“Should we call security?”

You look up at the civilians who watches on with brows knitted on their features, your keen eyes taking in each of their expression. Calling in security now will only anger this man further and you can’t have their faces falling recognizable to him in case he holds any grudges. You know not to involve people and ruin their lives when they haven’t done anything wrong to you but the sight of the man who dared to try to lay a finger on you even after you’ve warned him otherwise makes you tremble with uncontrolled anger.

You told him you hate to be reminded of the past but he ignored your words and now you’re left here remembering Hwang Leehyun and his despicable touches that suddenly surfaces as if all they’ve been doing nothing but hiding under your skin, waiting to be revealed each time your memories resurfaces.

You hate it, you hate it, you hate it.

You want to kill this man.

“I’ll deal with him.” Namjoon’s commanding voice brings you back to the present for a second, just a split second. But still that second saves you for a moment because that second allows you to fall distracted, eyes flicking over to him sharply, and you watch when Yoongi and Jungkook, who you didn’t realize had also come over, take the man off you.

It saves you from having to be cautious in letting him touch you, allows you to breathe, to stand back up straight, to hide your hands behind your back.

That’s right. You’re calm, you’re calm. Nothing fazes you, you’re fine, everything’s fine. He didn’t touch you, he didn’t even graze you in the slightest. You’re fine and no one has to get hurt.

No one has to die. Not today.

You turn towards the crowd, feigning a small smile as you lower your head slightly at them. “Thank you for your concern, please return to your business. I apologize for the public disturbance.”

And without waiting for them to make their moves, you turn, following Namjoon away from the scene.

It’s silent for the longest time until you’re brought to the back of the building where it’s secluded and the sun is already setting. Yoongi and Jungkook keeps the man held against his will with Jimin following along, and Namjoon looks at you for a moment before he addresses you.

You should have known he’d visit this art museum. Namjoon enjoys looking at art during his pastimes, especially during times when things are rougher and he needs his moments of peace.

“How would you like to deal with him?” He asks, noting at the way you keep your hands held behind your back while keeping your distance. It seems you’re still cautious of being touched.

You look away from the man who had offended you, brows knitted as you stare at the horizon where the sun is slowly setting. “It’s fine,” you say, “looking at him a moment longer will only cause my blood to boil.”

You’re still dealing with the aftermath of your last endeavors, they can tell, that’s why Namjoon remained silent about the profound revelation he found. Although he may be angry with questions waiting to be demanded out of you, he kept his emotions at bay after seeing it physically in front of him just how hard the last event had hit you.

Still, he can feel his patience quickly slipping away now that he’s bathed in your presence. You still seem weak, not your usual aloof self who was always so great at hiding your true self slip past anyone, and although others may not realize it, he’s able to see through you in some of the slightest ways, letting him know that you’ve indeed taken a great hit from Leehyun.

His body may have burned away but the memories will always remain.

Namjoon understands how that feels.

“Leave him be then,” he tells the two before looking at you again, “I’m sure you’ll deal with him if you’d like in the future. I won’t interfere.”

You give him a nod and the three of them leaves with the man in toll, leaving you alone with Namjoon.

Silence fills once more, leaving you with the same uncomfortable feeling you’ve felt for the past few days. A storm is brewing and slowly but surely, you can feel the match beginning to ignite. Perhaps he has something to say to you, perhaps he realized something, or perhaps it’s something else, but either way you see that Namjoon isn’t speaking up even though it looks like he’s hiding something from you.

You turn on your heels, not wanting to stall this moment any longer. If he wishes to say something, whether that’s about what happened at the Hwang’s manor or something else, he can say it at another time. Right now you just want to return home and take your anger out in the training field.

“Jungwon.” You pause in your steps upon the name that slips from Namjoon’s mouth, his first word taking you by unexpected surprise. “He’s dead…isn’t he?”

There’s a hint of wrath in his voice, a hint of fear, a hint of unease and terror, accompanied by anxious thoughts that run through his mind and as you stand there still under the lights that have flickered on upon the sun now dimming the city, you don’t give him an answer.

But that in itself is an answer and you hear him scoff.

It’s filled with disbelief and disappointment.

“To think you’d lie to me and use someone I love against me.”

You turn around at those words, making sure to keep a level head. Despite the fact that he found out the truth about your schemes, you always told yourself to be prepared for moments like this. Namjoon would have found out one way or another. After all, he wanted the truth on where his brother was, and eventually, you would have either had to relay to him the news of his death or he’d find out on his own.

You just never expected he’d find out this soon. You thought you had more time.

“I didn’t lie to you, Namjoon, I just withheld the truth.”

Namjoon laughs at those words, the amusement dead and filled with nothing but pure ire. “And what? You think that’s any better? You know just how much my brother means to me.” You see the other three returning from where you stand, see the way the rest of them have come along as well and it almost feels as if you’re cornered. You can’t run, you have to face Namjoon’s wrath and their disappointment but you expected this. You expected to be hated by them and you prepared yourself not to care, to let them go when the time came. They left you, you’re free to leave them in the dust as well. “You were my wife and I trusted you with my vulnerability. I shared a part of myself I’d never share with anyone else and this is how you’re going to act in turn? By using information on my brother against me?”

You know what you’re about to say is toxic, that you shouldn’t turn this against him but after what happened with Leehyun, you can only feel your patience and mask slipping away as the day passes so you don’t care to hold your tongue this time.

“I could say the same thing about you, Namjoon. I trusted you with my heart and guess what happened in the end? You took it right out, ripped it to shreds, and threw it onto the ground without a care in the world.” The new scars on your body, the gash on your leg, they all still hurt in many ways and you hate the fact that they saw you in that vulnerable state.

“This is my brother we’re talking about.”

“And what? My feelings never meant anything to you?” You ask, challenging him. “You have to admit what you did to me was wrong and even after all these years, you’re acting as if nothing happened. I hate it most when people feign ignorance and pretend all is well without wanting to face the horrid part of things.” You take a sharp look at the others, making sure they know as well. “From the very beginning, I was on the losing end. I was made a pawn in the game you took part in, all just for the sake of power, and then you proceeded to toss me aside once you no longer needed me. Isn’t it only fair I do the same thing to you?”

“That doesn’t make it right for you to have used my brother against me,” he retorts with the same fire burning in your eyes. “You acted as if the butler who served you was someone you cared deeply for but in the end, everyone’s just a pawn for you to use at your disposal, huh?”

“Then you and I are similar in that aspect. You are not innocent, Kim Namjoon. Did you really think after all these years I’d remain that same soft-hearted girl I was then?” You chuckle bitterly at the thought. “She would never forgive the person that I am now but she’s gone, Namjoon, she’s dead, so she cannot stop me from using you in the way I wish to. If I want to use your brother against you, I’ll use your brother against you. The butler I grew up with was a butler who served me well, but he was foolish thinking he could have gotten out of that manor safe and secure without troubles along the way. Your father was the one who led him to the Reaper’s manor but when his mission grew completed, he hesitated upon leaving. Do you wanna know why?” You stare him dead in the eyes without blinking in the slightest way.

“It was because of me,” you say, unfaltering. “He stayed because of me. And guess what happened in the end? I killed him.”

“This is all your fault,” your father whispers into your ear. “He’s dead because of you.”

The trembling and terrified little girl then no longer shakes when she looks into the eyes of Kim Namjoon, the little brother of the very first man who ever loved you and the very first man whom you loved gently in turn.

Mister Butler was a man who always smiled your way no matter how rough the circumstances were. He was always there for you, the only one who held his arms out when you stood on the side, holding your tears in upon the rejection from your mother and father, the only one who allowed you to cry without scolding you, without scoffing or walking away. He was the only man who cared for you in the Reaper’s manor, providing you the fatherly protection you always needed from the very beginning.

He was your father, your brother, your friend, and the companion you sought the existence of. He was your soulmate, the very first one.

And when he left, your world fell apart.

Nothing was right from the very beginning but he made it seem as if that in itself was okay because he was there and whenever he was there, everything turned out to be okay at the end of the day. You could go to your mother, get rejected and ridiculed, but turn to your butler and he’d sing you praises after praises. You could look up at your father with those wide and innocent eyes, the eyes of a child seeking the slightest attention they could receive from a busy and distant father, and even after he ignored you for the hundredth time, you could turn to your butler and he’d give you the attention you crave a hundred times more.

“I hope Mister finds your happiness someday.”

“And I hope the miss finds her happiness as well.”

You both broke your promise; his was forcibly ripped away from him and you no longer seek to find the pleasures in life.

You see the way Namjoon’s brows furrow slightly more, his chin protruding in the way it does when he’s angry, but you can tell there’s some suspicion leveled your way upon your words so you decide to drive him more mad.

He can hate you all he wants. You want him to hate you. He has to hate you and see you as nothing but a cruel and selfish monster.

You’re a monster.

“The day of the incident, I watched him with my very own eyes as life slipped away from him. His eyes were lifeless, dead, a corpse. In the same way I killed my mother and father, I killed your brother as well. The man who cared so much for me died at my very own hands. His death was all..my...fault.”

You drag out the words, speaking the last remaining three words carefully and slowly as if to try and purposely antagonize him.

It works.

Because you see the way Namjoon’s eyes brighten with red, how it shakes, how his lips tremble slightly, how it takes him a moment before he tries to get the words out of his throat. “...What?”

Hoseok watches you with brows slightly knitted in between, his mouth open but unable to utter anything out and you hate the way he looks disappointed, as if everything that he’s ever known about you is slowly slipping away and the mirror has slowly but surely shattered.

It’s okay though, you want this. You want him to hate you, to finally show anger and disappointment and think all ill thoughts of you with no rainbows or sunshine left in between. If Hoseok thinks nothing but love and still cares for the person he let slip from his grasp, it will only hurt the two of you in the end.

Because you are incapable of loving, you have to make him hate you.

And if that means making him hate you through your hatred for Namjoon, then you’ll use that to your advantage. No one knows of Mister Butler anyways, and the ones who did have all died and left to burn to tell your tales. No one knows how much you loved that man, how you cried so hard the day your father killed him mercilessly. Though you may not remember clearly of the incident itself, you will never forget how much it hurt losing him and in turn, being blamed and made the villain of his story when all you ever wanted was nothing but his happiness.

Father turned everything onto you. Everything was your fault. You killed your beloved butler who showed nothing but love and care towards you. You were the fool who killed your father, your brother, your friend, your companion, and your soulmate.

You killed him.

Namjoon lunges after you in a blind fits of anger and as you keep your emotions well hidden in the depth of your heart, you hate the way this reminds you of those days all those years ago when Namjoon grew to hate you and the rest of your lovers did nothing but watch in turn.

Here you are reliving those same memories.

But rather than letting him take you down the way you did those years ago, this time you fight back. This time you lunge right back at him, not caring for anything else in this world even as something in the back of your mind tells you that you can’t win.

You can never win against Namjoon because at the end of the day, he will always be stronger than you. No matter how much strength you’ve gained through your years of torture, no matter how hard you’ve trained, how great your masters were, your strength can never exceed that of his.

“How dare you?!”

If Namjoon wasn’t blinded by rage, he’d use his brain just like any other day and realize how could a small little girl just nine years old possibly kill a man who held the strength and power of a mafia heir behind him? If he wasn’t so blinded by emotions, he’d remember the girl you used to be; afraid of guns and violence and always hidden behind the safety and comfort of her loved ones. How could a little girl like that, whether loved by her people or not, possibly rid of another man?

How could she? When all she wanted was nothing but happiness for the people that gave her nothing but kindness?

“Namjoon stop.” Hoseok. Poor Hoseok who still has the brains to try and rationalize things tries to meditate between two opposing opponents.

“Stop?” Namjoon scoffs. “She killed my brother!”

That’s right, blame me. Hate me. Hate me even more.

“You know what’s funny?” You pick yourself up from the ground, disregarding the fact that your white skirt now has stains on it as you reach for the knife hidden under it. “That I still haven’t gotten an explanation as to what happened all those years ago. Do you really think I’ll keep being patient without ever demanding an answer out of you?”

“Why the hell did you kill my brother? What did Jungwon ever do to you?” He doesn’t look for an answer before forcing you to dodge to the side with his blade grazing the skin of your arm. No matter how quick you are, you’re still slower than Namjoon. “That’s right, Jungwon didn’t do anything, did he? He’s not the type to hurt a little girl.” The more he pushes forward, the less space you have as you dodge back with your feet leaping behind at each step he forces you to take. “Did you have your people go after him? Force him to submit to you? Did you go to your father and make up stories in order to get rid of my brother?”

You manage to land a punch on his face upon those words, feeling your own anger building up. “I told you my truth. Why don’t you tell me yours, Namjoon? Surely I deserve it, right? After putting up with being your pawn, after letting you use me on that mission where you forced me to submit to a disgusting creep. Did you ever actually love me, Namjoon? Or was that all just a game you and the rest of your boys decided to play in in order to see how long things would last?”

“Y/N—”

“I didn’t deserve that.” Your eyes burn with red, baring your teeth as you glare at the rest of them. “We live in a world where emotions and weaknesses are not welcomed yet I trusted you with my heart. I gave you my soul. I listened to your problems, allowed you to lean on me, held you, loved you, did all that I could because I trusted in your love, and in turn, I got treated like nothing but a pawn in that little game you decided to play.”

You push Namjoon against his chest upon his silence. “I put up with so much. Allowed you to degrade me, belittled me, let you say all those cruel things to me while being that silent good little girl you always cared for. That night I ripped my ring out, I even begged on my knees for you.”

“..What?” Hoseok whispers softly, words you’re unable to be heard because you’re focused on everyone else but him. He stands there in utter silence, listening to you and taking each and everything to heart.

You got on your knees and begged for them?

They…forced you to that point?

Them?

Hoseok turns to look at the rest of them with disbelief, as if trying to find someone in order to tell him that you’re wrong, that they didn’t force you to that point, and that you’re just spewing out nonsense because you’re angry.

“And you.” But before he can get an answer out of any of them, you’re speaking up too quickly as you point your finger at the rest of the boys. “Do you have any idea how much I second-guessed my position in our relationship? How much I envied the passing times you’ve already spent with one another? How many nights I went to sleep thinking perhaps you could have done better, perhaps I shouldn’t have intervened and got into the arranged marriage? Do you have any idea how many insecurities I built, convincing myself that you could never love me as much as you loved each other? That when it ever came to a point where one or two of you is fighting against me, I’d be on the losing end and no one would take my side because you loved each other more than you loved me?”

You laugh bitterly thinking about those days, feeling foolish for not giving in to those thoughts. “You had the audacity to make me think otherwise when in the end, my greatest nightmare came true.”

Namjoon forces himself in between you and them, pushing you back slightly on the shoulder. “Don’t make this about you.”

“What? Don’t make this about me?” You scoff at him with disbelief. “I gave you my truth, Namjoon, don’t you think it’s high time you gave me yours? Unless you plan on keeping me in the dark forever? If you really loved me then, if those three years were real and not a lie you built for me to live in then give me the truth that I deserved all those years ago. You wanted me gone no matter what, right? And I gave you that benefit, I walked away from our marriage because you no longer wanted me there anymore so whatever the hell is the reason behind those cold shoulders of yours, give it to me damn it! I deserve it more than anyone!”

“I stopped loving you!” He shouts against your anger and it catches you off guard for a moment.

You look at him for a second and when a heartbeat passes, you let out a disbelief scoff. “Now was that so hard to say? You sick bastard..!”

You push forth with your knife hung in the air but before you can strike, Seokjin’s right in front of you, forcing your hand away and as you take a moment to watch him with bafflement, you realize the rest of them are all standing by Namjoon’s side, refusing to let you harm him in any way.

Hoseok looks distraught as he remains where he first stood, his head falling to the side, avoiding your gaze, and once again it seems that no matter how hard you tried, you could have never competed against their love for one another. Because even if Hoseok were on your side then, they would have never pushed him away or allowed him to leave in order to stay by your side. They loved him too much to let him go to you.

How selfish.

How…cruel.

“I see.” The strength in your voice weakens as you face the hard truth and although it looks like they want to say something, you don’t let them. “In the end, you really did love each other more than you did me. And I’m not upset at that, why I be? Feelings are something we cannot force no matter how much we try but you should have told me the truth instead of letting me be the fool into believing I could have been enough. I was never enough for you, was I? Or perhaps you were already enough for each other you didn’t need another one to intervene. Perhaps in the beginning you really did love me, or you thought you did. I want to believe in that love because you showed me sides to you you’d never show to anyone else. I want to believe that you were kind and not some cruel, heartless monsters who never cared for me and only used me as your pawns.

“And I’m not hurt because of the past. I’m over it. I’m hurt at the fact that you turned the little girl I was into a lovesick fool and made her believe nothing that she did would ever satisfy you. But she did nothing wrong…did she?” You look at them with your cold expression falling away, the anger still there but lessened as you’re more disappointed and hurt than anything. “I did nothing wrong. I was always enough, but you made me feel otherwise.”

You turn from them, not wanting to look at them any further. And as you walk away, this time even Hoseok doesn’t chase after you.

Perhaps he understands your pain, knows just how much the boys have messed up. And whether he wants to choose you or not is not a choice for him to make because at the end of the day, it will always be the boys.

You will always be Hoseok’s second choice.

“...Som.”

“Boss?” Dasom’s at your side in an instant. You aren’t sure how and where she appeared from but the second you walk in through the doors and uttered her name, she’s right there at your disposal, her eyes widened, a quick display of surprise plastered on her usual expressionless face. “What happened there?” She points at the light graze on your arm, her anger clear. “We aren’t supposed to go for another one until later so who dared to hurt you? Who do I have to—”

You put your hand up, cutting her off immediately just as Yuna appears alongside her. They remain silent in your presence, taking in the way you look. Your once pure white skirt spoils with dirt, blazer hung over your arm for someone to take, eyes falling blankly to the floor with a look of exhaustion clear on your face. There’s a slight furrow in your brows, lips sealed tight, eyes twitching a little.

You’re trembling in the slightest way. It won’t ever be prominent to the normal eyes but your Reapers will never miss anything about you.

Dasom’s quick to rush away on her feet without a word, probably to call Mingyu, while you look around for something, feeling restless, before sitting flat on the floor.

“I hate heels,” you utter, allowing your legs to straighten right before you, and without needing to demand anything out of them, your Reapers know immediately what to do.

Yuna crouches down to take your shoes off while someone else takes your hair clip off to free your hair.

“Boss?” And when Mingyu’s voice is heard, you stare up with an effort, suddenly marked with a memory of the past.

Everyone has left the room upon your silence. Everyone but your right-hand man.

You sit still on the floor of your bedroom, the only place that’s secure in this hellhole. You hate what lies outside the door, hate the halls, the eyes of your father’s men, your father himself, and everything else that exists.

Mingyu tends to the wounds you reveal after ripping your sleeves off, trusting in only him to see them after having gone through a series of feigning your strength before your father. He sent you on another dangerous mission, hoping to kill you.

“Boss?” Mingyu speaks up into the silence, prompting you gently as if he knows there are some things you want to let out.

So you speak. “Mingyu.”

“What is it?” He remains patient upon your hesitation, so you turn to look at him, eyes distant but holding onto your last bit of sanity that still exists.

“I’m tired,” you say, and that’s all he needs to hear to understand.

“Mingyu.”

He crouches down to your level and stares at the cut on your arm before taking a look at your slightly reddened feet from the heels. The silence lingers in the air and so he looks up at the rest, a signal they’re quick to pick up on and without a word, the Reapers that have gathered around all scatter away.

Once they’re all gone and out of sight without alerting any of your senses, you finally utter out more words.

“I’m tired,” you say, and Mingyu understands.

You’re tired, tired of everything. Tired of the world, of people, of everyone that has hurt you, of being weak and unable to face the truth without trembling, of pretending, of keeping strong, of lying, of being lied to, of your enemies, of your friends, of everyone and everything.

You’re tired.

You want to rest, to stop, to reset, to freeze time, to relive everything and make better decisions just so you don’t have to live through all of this ever again.

From what Mingyu can tell, there’s only one group of people that can make you look this way. There aren’t a lot of people who can go up against you after all, not to mention you had no plans to face anyone annoying today, so the only conclusion he can come up with is that you accidentally met up with Bangtan and something happened.

“He found out Mister Butler died,” you say, already knowing that Mingyu can always speculate what’s going on with you. Mister Butler will always be Mister Butler to you. Not Kim Jungwon, not Namjoon’s brother, not a man belonging to another gang, just Mister Butler. Your butler.

Your kind and gentle butler whom you killed.

“Ah,” is all Mingyu says as he makes himself comfortable on the floor.

You take your knees up to your chest and lay your cheek against them. “I told him I killed him myself.”

He purses his lips. “Why would you lie to him like that?”

“I wanted him to hate me.” You pause. “To blame me.” It’s a simple answer and Mingyu can already tell what’s going on inside your head.

You hate showing any bit of weakness in front of others, especially in front of strangers and in front of people that have wronged you. You hate it when someone shakes your core, when you can’t stand upright, when your falsehood falls and your brave act begins to break, and he knows you must have hated it most that you had to show such a vulnerable side of yourself towards the very ones who drove you back into such a harsh environment, forcing you to survive all on your own.

They unknowingly fed you to the wolves, just to watch in horror as they finally witnessed the consequences of their actions. What makes it worst is that they don’t even know that that was all their doing. You would have been safe staying with Bangtan if they hadn’t forced you to leave.

Lying to Namjoon about killing his brother was your way of distancing yourself from him, because even you could tell something would have changed in your relationship were he to begin acting differently around you after London’s mission.

You hate being weak and you hate it most of the people’s reactions to it.

Some people use that against you while others sympathize and act with more care around you. You and Mingyu both know Namjoon isn’t the type to use your weakness against you so you decided to keep playing the villain and drive him away.

“Do you ever plan on telling him the truth someday?”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because he deserves it,” Mingyu says, “that’s his brother after all. No matter what happened between the two of you, you know he deserves the truth and not the lie you told him of killing his own brother yourself.”

You know.

You know more than anyone Namjoon deserves to hear the truth about what happened all those years ago. You remember the first night he opened up to you about his brother, how broken he looked to believe he failed Jungwon when in reality he had nothing to do with his death. It was all the corrupted fathers that involved themselves in the game of thrones, willing to discard all and anyone away whether they were family or not.

Namjoon’s father was just like yours and you know that if Namjoon were to ever find out the truth about your father, he’d hate himself the most.

They all would.

But you don’t care to give them the truth because they don’t deserve it, none of them do. None except Hoseok but you know that if Hoseok were to ever know everything, he’d beat himself up the most and you don’t deserve to put him through any of that.

Your secrets will remain yours both from Bangtan and the Reapers.

Still, if there’s anything Namjoon deserves, it’s the truth about his brother, just as Mingyu said. It wasn’t fair of you to use his brother against him after all. You were cruel for that but you had to do what you had to do. It was the only way to get through to Namjoon, make him a pawn in this stupid revenge game of yours. He doesn’t deserve the lies you gave him, the truth you withheld from him, but revealing the truth about Mister Butler’s death will also bring your own truth forward and you don’t think you can take that.

“If I tell him the truth about Mister Butler…that means telling my truth.” Mingyu watches you carefully as you speak and because you know even he and Yuna doesn’t know much about your past, your brows knit in distress as you look away from that piercing gaze, holding onto your knees even tighter. “Father killed him,” you utter bitterly as you bite against your lower lip, the effects of the incident still a place you’d rather not return to. “He was the first love I lost.”

You’ve told them about the first man who ever showed you kindness, that because he loved you, he died. You told them about Bangtan, that they failed you and betrayed your trust. The two of them, Mister Butler and Bangtan, are the very reasons why the Reapers are not permitted to love you.

To you, being loved is something out of the book. You’re scared of being loved because in the end, they either die or betray you. That is why you cannot see how deeply the Reaper’s loyalty lies.

Because you refuse to.

Because you’re afraid of it.

Afraid of loving and afraid of being loved.

“If I tell him about Mister Butler..how he died and how he lived…he’ll connect the dots. He’s already doing it right now, I’m sure of it. How can you still blindly think a father actually treated his daughter finely knowing she’s been through some stuff? Namjoon’s not stupid, none of them are. It was easy to live in the lie back then but now that I’m deliberately going after people, how can anyone not begin to question things?”

So you’ve pushed them away not only because you didn’t want them to treat you any differently but also because you’re pushing them away from the truth they may be hoping to find out.

“Not that it matters much anymore anyways.” You press your forehead upon your knees, hiding your face completely. “I told him I killed his brother and he told me he stopped loving me. In the end, the old me who was once the center of their attention fell away and was never enough for them. What a pitiful little girl,” you scoff lightly, bitter at the fact you’ve just uttered. “Nothing hurts more than trying your absolute best and still not being good enough. She was so..dumb. But maybe she knew the truth all along. Maybe she just didn’t want to believe in it, deluding herself into lies after lies, trying to keep up the fantasy, living in a house of cards that had been inevitable to fall from the very beginning.

“She was a fool. An utter, pitiful fool.”

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reikives · 2 years

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reinorshine -> reikives

change of url bc i got tired of the first one quick 😓

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reikives · 2 years

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hii!! I'm sorry for all those who were waiting for an august fic rec! ive been busy all throughout august and september since class started and ive been dumped with all kinds of works to do <//3

If you guys have any fics you would like to recommend, please do send them in! I would love to read them and maybe they could be in the next fic rec <3

#bts fic #bts fluff #bts angst #bts smut #bts imagine #fic rec #bts au

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reikives · 2 years

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July BTS Fic Recommendations

note from sunie:

For my first few lists I will be posting, it wont really be just for the current month but a few are also some of my favorites from a few years back that I really want to share!

I also want to say thank you, to all the authors who have put in hard work to create these pieces of literature for us to enjoy!

I hope everyone enjoys them as much as I did! You can also send in recommendations in my asks which will always be open! I will try my hardest to keep up!

🌸- fluff 🥀-angst 🌹-mature/suggestive

📖-drabbles/oneshots

📚- series 📝- ongoing ✔️-completed

Yoongi

📖>Kale’in Me Softly (@jimlingss)

Farmer!Yoongi, strangers to lovers 🌸, 🥀(has a little sting), 🌹(mature scene) Word count: 17.1k Summary: After your grandfather's passing, you decide to take over his farm and plant the trendiest vegetable: kale. It's a struggle to be in the countryside when you've always been a city girl. But there's someone less than sympathetic — a grumpy farmer across the acres who's constantly trying to pick a fight with you. Warning/s: Strongly implied smut

—I love their style of writing! I think this fic was v cute and the heat in that one scene was a great sprinkle🤭 Its a great read and I highly recommend!

📖>Bloom (@guksthighs)

hanahaki au, best friends to lovers 🥀,🌸 Word count: 1.7k Summary: When you fall in love with your best friend, flowers begin to bloom. Hanahaki disease - an illness born from one-sided love, where the patient throws up and coughs of flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. The infection can be removed through surgery, but the feelings disappear along with the petals. Warning/s: its kind of a tear-jerker but not to worry, its ONLY a tear-jerker there will be knowing flowing of tears (hopefully) <3

—This is actually a read from a few years back that I still come back to once in awhile. I have kept in my notes to remember! I absolutely love guksthigh's works and I think they're beautifully written!

📖>VALUABLES (@drowsymochi)

Established relationship 🌸 Word Count: 306 Summary: “they don’t mean anything to me.” Warning/s: teeth-rotting fluff, Yoongi is so sweet I might consider it an angst from how he makes me cry bc he.

—super cute quick read omg, I abs loved it, makes me want to have an s/o..

Namjoon:

📖>Who are you? (@ausblack)

Hybrid!Namjoon x Hybrid!reader 🌸, 🥀 Word count: 3.4k Summary: A mysterious hybrid that reeks of suppressants catches Namjoon, the wolf hybrid. He's determined to find out what you are. Warning/s: mentions of drinking and smoking, insecurities

—I love this so much! Made me feel a bit fuzzy from how cute this is. Ausblack has been one of my favorite readers when I first got into tumblr a few years back! I recommend their works!

📖>Cut (@chimchimsauce)

Soulmate au, College au 🌸, 🥀 Word count: 1.1k Summary: Namjoon always hated soulmates Warning/s: implied sex and of drinking/smoking (?)

—I love soulmate aus and I absolutely love quick angst reads! Its so good and I come back to it from time to time! I recommend it to all esp if you love quick reads!

Jimin:

📖>Adonis (@xjoonchildx)

Paramedic!Jimin x reader 🌸, a little comedy Word count: 3.4k Summary: your crackpot of a neighbor will not rest until you throw yourself at the gorgeous paramedic in town. she’s nuts, y'all. Warning/s: smoking, sexual innuendo, implied smut

—Very cute and funny fic to read, it was written nicely! I recommend to those who would enjoy a little comedy when they read.

Taehyung:

📚✔️>Camellia (@kinktae)

Prince!Taehyung x Herbalist!reader 🌸, 🥀(if you squint), 🌹(mature) 2/2 Summary: Prince Taehyung comes to find out that the castle has got a new tea girl, and man is she cute. Warning/s: insecurities, smut in 2nd chapter

—I read this a few years back and I still come back to it once in awhile because its well written and I just love the story. This actually got me to love royalty / prince/princess aus and its so cute it hurts.. Super great read! I very much recommend 🥰

📖>Playful (@chimyoung)

Owner!Taehyung x Hybrid!reader 🌸, 🥀 Word count: 3.6k Summary: A mischievous and energetic fox hybird causes an accident in the living room that sets off her boyfriend. Warning/s: lil bit of angst, swearing, couples arguing, Taehyung is a meanie, mentions of blood/injuries, nothing too graphic, there’s a mean guy in a park, that’s about it.

—Ahh its a cute readdd. It has some angst that stings but the fluff balances it out in the end. I've also read a few other of their works that I think that's worth checking out!

Jungkook:

📖>in which you always come home to Jungkook. (@onlyswan)

Established relationship 🌸, lowkey 🥀, 🌹(suggestive) Word count: 3.7k Warning/s: mention of the word whore, boner, showering together

—Its a perfect mix of everything! I've always loved her works and this never disappoints. Its a sweet read if you just want something chill (in my opinion). Highly recommend their work 🥰

📖>Still With Me? (@magicalmarauder)

Boxer!Jungkook, established relationship 🌸, 🥀 (it stings a bit..) Word count: 4k+ Summary: Dating the world’s fastest growing boxer meant several things – kissing his wounds at the end of every fight, watching countless boxing matches to study new techniques with him, and worrying like crazy as different men every night tried to bash his face in. But what happens when tensions run high after a match and Jungkook throws your support back in your face? Warning/s: definitely violence bc boxing, mentions of bruises/wounds, koo was an ass for like 5 seconds

—I am a sucker for anything boxer Jungkook so 😝😝 It stings in a few parts of the story but there is some fluff that act as a band aid do not panic 🙅‍♀️ Nicely written, I love it so much I've actually read it a few time hehe ❤️❤️

📚📝>Quarters (@justoneday-namjoonii)

Boxer!Jungkook x IceSkater!reader 🌸, 🥀 9/? Summary: A look into the dysfunctional relationship of Jungkook, an aspiring boxer, and an aspiring Ice Skater. Warning/s: mentions of abuse, dysfunctional relationship, angst might be triggering to some

—Another boxer!jungkook because I am abs inlove with boxer koo. This is a nice read if you're in angst w just a sprinkle of fluff or like fics w a rollercoaster of emotions!

📖>The Habits of a Broken Heart. (@softykooky)

Soulmate au, subtle enemies to lovers, slow burn, art student!Jungkook x english student!reader 🌸, 🥀 Word count: 26.3k Summary: Jungkook and you are soulmates. so says the matching crescent moons on both your wrists. however, things are never as easy as they seem, and you are quick to learn that falling in love with someone who does not believe in love is a one-way ticket to heartbreak.

alternatively,

“You still are, you know. Worth it.” You release a shaky breath. “But I was stupid to think that I am too.” Warning/s: jealousy, unrequited love, shouting (?(please bear with me i dont really knw what to put in warnings yet 💀))

—I think I've read this about 5 times already ahhh.. Its so goooooddd, the angst really hits you.. it made me cry every time but the ending makes up for it. I love how well written this is, its a lovely fic to read 💗💗💗

📖>How Long Will We Fall (@jiminrings)

Soulmate au, painful f2l, unrequited love (at first) 🌸, 🥀 Word count: 14k Summary: If it’s fate, it should already be set onto your skin — that’s why Jungkook’s initials are already on your finger. he’s always there for you, but not only for you. if you’re his fate, he’d rather not have it. alternatively,

Jungkook’s your soulmate, but he doesn’t want to be.

—Another angst soulmate au bc I love hurting myself hehe, I love how this was written, I love the character development, I love the angst, I love this..

Poly/OT7

📚✔️>Hybrid House (@hollyhomburg)

Hybrid!BTS x Hybrid!reader 🌸, 🥀, 🌹 (mature) 3/3 + Epilogue Summary: to Seokjin, Home consists of his human partners Namjoon and Hoseok as well as their Hybrids; the pups- named Taehyung and Jimin, their black cat- called Yoongi, and their foxboy- called Jungkook. Together they have the happiest family possible, everyone loves everyone equally.

So what happens when Namjoon finds you? a cat hybrid, beaten close to death left alone in an alleyway on the coldest night of the year? He takes you home, shows you his family, and together they teach you what love can be like. Warning/s: mentions of blood/injuries, abuse, heavy smut scenes, Jungkook being mean for a bit

—I have been a fan of their work for a long time already and I think this is among one of my favorite works of theirs. Its's very well written and I recommend this to those who have hybrid aus up their allies. Great author, great work ❤️

📖>Sugary Sweet (@hollyhomburg)

Hybrid! Reader x Hybrid! Taehyung x Hybrid! Yoongi x Owner! Namjoon 🌸, 🥀 Word Count: 10k Summary: Namjoon has a perfect life once he moves out of the city to a cabin alongside his two rescue hybrids, Yoongi and Taehyung. But then one night in the middle of the rainstorm they find you, a bunny hybrid, hiding in their chicken coop. Warning/s: Anxiety attacks, Anxious! Namjoon, mentions of hybrid abandonment, hybrid mistreatment, Half of this is Domestic fluff, possessive behavior.

—Another great hybrid read from hollyhomburg!! Very cute and has some angst to spice it up, it pulls on the heartstrings just right❤️❤️ I actually have read this a few times, I'm one to come back to something if I really enjoy it. So again, amazing work, this is actually my favorite from them ❤️

📚📝>Cry Me A River (@minniepetals)

Mafia!au, arrange marriage!au 🌸, 🥀 13/? Summary: Forever is just an illusion, nothing lasts forever. Don't make me a promise that you cannot keep. Please... it'll break my heart. Warning/s: (triggering topics! please read at your own discretion) childhood trauma, mental abuse, physical abuse, child neglect, manipulation, gaslighting, violence, mentions of assault, implied sexual assault, hurt and comfort, divorce, emotional neglect, minor character deaths, kidnapping, some emotionally unstable scenes.

—AN ALL TIME FAVORITE OF MINE. First, I abs love mafia aus and I love angst. CMAR was written beautifully,,, perfectly. It has me crying and screaming all over the place. You can feel the emotions as you read this series, that why I love it so much. It's so angsty I love it. Minnie does a great job in writing this that I always earn for more every other chapter, IM COMPLETELY HOOKED. The attention to detail is just amazing and she also listens to the readers, I love her sm.. Great read, I absolutely recommend cmar.

—If anyone has noticed, there are no Jin and Hobi fics on my recs as of the moment, its because I have yet to find jin and hobi fics that suit taste! Please do recommend some fics and authors in my asks if you have any recommendations! I will be reading them when I have time!

I will try to post recs weekly if I am not busy. Maybe I'll just post when I can and then have my monthly recs!

#bts fluff #bts angst #bts smut #bts imagine #bts series #bts mafia au #bts college au #bts established relationship au #bts slow burn #bts comfort #bts arranged marriage au #bts f2l #bts soulmate au #bts e2l #bts unrequited love #bts fic #bts royalty au #bts hanahaki au

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reikives · 2 years

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adonis | pjm x reader

🚨 summary: your crackpot of a neighbor will not rest until you throw yourself at the gorgeous paramedic in town. she's nuts, y'all.

🚨 pairing: reader x paramedic!jimin

🚨 genre: meddling neighbors? horny little old ladies with bad-slash-good intentions? awkward OCs who can't find the words to speak in the presence of greatness?

🚨 warnings: one very mouthy senior citizen, sweet/shy jimin, an OC who can't find a clean shirt throughout the entire fic, one very spoiled pomeranian, smoking, sexual innuendo, literally one line of implied smut

🚨 word count: 3.4K (lmao)

🚨 notes: this is my drabble *snort* for the possum anniversary and i am celebrating the wonderful @starlostjimin who is such a cool, funny, amazing, talented person. did you know that 911 is 911 in america AND canada? anyhoo. i hope you like my very first jimin fic ever, and i hope it delivers on the things that you wanted 💕

thank you always to @hobi-gif for being the most amazing beta and person in general.

If you had to wager a guess, you’d say it was Mrs. Choi from the fourth floor who’d dialed 911. That miserable old bat has always struck you as kind of a snitch.

At any rate, that’s how you find yourself standing outside your condo at ten o’clock at night, wearing nothing but a faded bathrobe and a pair of worn-out house slippers. Lights mounted on top of the fire truck idling at your building’s entrance turn the courtyard into a tragic makeshift disco, everything and everyone splashed in flashes of red and white.

You mill around on the damp grass with the rest of your neighbors, each of you turned into temporary exiles in mismatched sleepwear.

Mr. Nam from the sixth floor is yelling into his phone as he paces, giving someone an earful about the disruption. Mrs. Song from the seventh floor was smart enough to grab a lawn chair and she watches the scene unfold like it’s one of her beloved dramas. Mr. Baek from the first floor doesn’t pay any mind to the fuss around him, engrossed in a book good enough to drown out the grumbling and sirens.

But you don’t spot the woman who lives in the unit next to yours – not right away – because it takes her an absurdly long time to heed this whole evacuation business.

When Mrs. Yun finally breezes through the condo’s glass doors, she does so with all the subtlety of a pageant queen. She makes a beeline for you, decked out in a Hawaiian-print muumuu loud enough to wake the dead – accessorized by a full face of makeup, a full set of curlers, and her trusty Pomeranian tucked under one arm.

“What is all this fuss about?” she pouts, giving Chichi an affectionate scratch. You lean over to give the dog your own scratch and she licks your fingers as thanks.

“Hell if I know,” you shrug. “I came outside when I heard the sirens. Which, by the way, was about ten minutes ago.”

“I was busy,” Mrs. Yun sniffs, affronted by your reprimand. She sets Chichi down to pat her curlers and make sure each is still in place. “I have a friend coming over tonight.”

“A friend.”

“Yes honey, a friend,” she echoes, tone haughty. “You should try it some time.”

God, you really should. The only man in your life these days is the Doordash driver and the last time he’d come by, he’d made a clumsy joke about your sodium intake. You’d been embarrassed, sure, but somehow that pales in comparison to this reminder that you’re being outsexed by the little old lady next door.

“You should ask someone when they plan to let us back in,” Mrs. Yun says, tapping her foot impatiently. “You should ask – ” she pauses to look out over the crowd, eyes lighting as she points one fresh gel nail in the direction of the fire truck, “ – him.”

You follow the trajectory of that thin finger with your gaze until your eyes land on Mrs. Yun’s intended target. And then you blink as you take in what is surely the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. Dark eyes and sandy blonde hair and a jawline so sharp, it could have been cut from granite.

Holy shit.

“I’ll say,” Mrs. Yun grins, and your face burns with embarrassment when you realize you’ve spoken out loud. It flames even hotter when she raises an arm to wave him over.

“Sir? Sir!”

“No. No, no, no, no, no.” You panic, whispering in the most threatening tone you can muster. “Put your hand down. Don’t – ”

But it’s too late. Mrs. Yun has already caught the attention of this Earth-bound Adonis. He makes his way towards you both without delay, wearing an easy smile so devastating it makes sweat bead at your temples.

“Hi there,” he greets kindly. “How can I help you?”

“Thank you, Mr. – ” Mrs. Yun pauses to squint at the name embroidered on the man’s dark navy uniform, “ – Park. What’s all this uproar about tonight, huh?”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” he chuckles, and you find yourself mesmerized by the way his eyes crinkle at the corners. “Someone called 911 because they smelled smoke, so we had to come check it out.” A radio secured to his shoulder crackles with an incoming transmission and he pauses to listen before he speaks again. “Pretty sure they’re almost done checking the building. Old places like this, we’ve always got to put in a bit more attention where the wiring is concerned. Wouldn’t want to leave you ladies in a dangerous situation.”

“Oh, of course not,” Mrs. Yun purrs, making no effort to hide the cheeky once-over she gives him. “We certainly appreciate you being thorough.”

The Adonis – Mr. Park – flushes, clearing his throat as the tips of his ears turn pink. You make a mental note to sit Mrs.Yun down later to explain that a few things have changed since her heyday.

The radio crackles again, a garbled voice coming over the line.

“Sounds like they’re almost done,” he explains, looking down at his feet to find Chichi sniffing at his boot. He crouches down to pet her and she curls into the curve of his hand, eager for his touch.

Somehow you’re willing to bet this man has that kind of effect on everything in his path – men, women, and houseplants alike.

He gives Chichi a few firm scratches before getting back to his feet. The rigid fabric of his uniform pants strains against the lean muscles of his thighs as he moves and Mrs. Yun’s eyes practically bug out of her face. You’d jam an elbow in her side if you thought there was a chance you could pull it off without being caught.

“I’d better get back,” he says, turning to you with one of those debilitating smiles. Your toes curl inside the shabby velvet of your slippers. “Please don’t hesitate to let me know if you need anything.”

“Oh, we won’t!” Mrs. Yun calls out, appreciating his retreating form with a lifted brow. You wait until the man is well out of earshot before turning on her.

“What the hell was that?” you demand.

“That – ” she says with her nose in the air, “ – is why you never leave the house without your face on.”

“You were practically undressing that man with your eyes,” you accuse hotly. “You do know what sexual harrassment is, don’t you?”

Mrs. Yun huffs as she bends down to scoop up Chichi. “I wasn’t harassing the man, I was appreciating him. Fine art is meant to be admired.”

“Oh, please,” you grumble. “And don’t think I missed that little detail about the smoke.”

She narrows her eyes at you.

“Mind your business.”

🚨🚨🚨🚨

One week later, a knock at the door nearly startles you right off the couch. You frown into your half-eaten carton of ramen and set it down on the coffee table, taking a moment to seriously contemplate pretending not to be home.

But then there’s more knocking – more insistent this time.

You pad across the floor, crack the door open and the ramen in your stomach threatens to come right back up.

“Hi again.”

You blink.

“Sorry to bother you, it’s just that your neighbor suffered a fall and she said you would have a key to get into her place.”

The Adonis – Mr. Park – looks a little sheepish as he stands in the doorway, waiting for you to speak like a normal human being with a passable set of social skills. He shoves one hand through his sandy blonde hair and the locks seem to fall back in slow-motion.

“I – y-yes of course,” you stutter, so flustered that you nearly trip over your own feet in your haste to scramble for the kitchen. You dig Mrs. Yun’s spare key out of the silverware drawer and rush back to drop it into his waiting palm.

“I hope she’s okay,” you worry, biting at the inside of your cheek. “I’m right here if you guys need anything else.”

“We’ll take good care of her,” another voice promises, and you crane your neck to peer past the stunning Mr. Park to search for the source of it. A second man stands out in the hallway, a heavy duffel bag slung over one muscular arm covered in a myriad of tattoos. His face is boyish and beautiful and soft, a stark contrast to his powerful body.

Jesus. Who’s doing the recruiting in this city?

“We’ll have this back to you right away,” Mr. Park promises, and your neck heats when he rewards you with one of his sweet smiles.

The second they leave, you make a beeline for the bathroom – and cringe as you stand in the mirror and peel one half-dried ramen noodle off the front of your shirt.

🚨🚨🚨 🚨

15 minutes later, Mr. Park’s picture-perfect partner is knocking at your door.

“Hey there.”

You might have run a brush through your hair and dabbed on a bit of tinted chapstick in the last five minutes, but he notices that – or the absence of one half-dried ramen noodle, he makes no indication.

“Hi again,” you say. “Is she okay?”

“Oh, for sure. Maybe a little banged up, but otherwise she’s alright. She’s asking for you though, if you can walk over with me.”

“Yes, of course.” You shuffle into the hall and let him lead the way, through the open front door to Mrs. Yun’s unit and the narrow foyer that opens up into her living room. She’s upright on the couch, holding an ice pack to her head. The glorious Mr. Park is bent down on one knee at her side.

“I’ll tell you what,” she says, looking as pleased as a queen holding court, “I’m grateful every day for the very dedicated public servants in this city. That was terrifying.”

“But you’re okay, right?” you ask.

“Nothing broken, so far as we can tell,” the Adonis says. “She’s probably going to be good and sore tomorrow, but for now she’s doing just fine.”

“Thanks to Mr. Park and Mr. Jeon here,” Mrs.Yun says sweetly. A little too sweetly, in fact. The wheels in your brain start to turn and you eyeball her from across the room. She peeks at you from behind the ice pack and dons an angelic smile.

“Yes, they are certainly appreciated,” you say slowly, the skepticism in your voice vibrating at a frequency only Mrs. Yun can hear. She beams at Mr. Park as he gets to his feet and starts to pack up his things.

Mr. – Jeon, was it? – slings his heavy duffel bag over his shoulder. “Be sure and take those anti-inflammatories tonight, okay? You’ll be all locked up in the morning if you don’t.”

Mrs. Yun practically preens at the personal attention she’s gotten from these two insanely good-looking men. “I will.”

“You’re lucky to have a good neighbor,” the Adonis says to Mrs. Yun, turning to you with a genuine smile. Your heart thuds in response. “If it’s alright with you, keep an eye on her tonight? She might need your help.”

“I’ll keep an eye on her, alright,” you say with a tight smile, and Mrs. Yun clears her throat.

🚨🚨🚨🚨

“Promise me – right now – that you really fell.”

“What did I tell you about leaving the house with your face on?”

“Answer the question,” you fire back and Mrs. Yun sighs, tossing the ice pack down on the couch.

“Yes, honey, I did fall. I fell in love with that scrumptious Mr. Park the second I saw him. And if I were a woman thirty – ”

You raise an eyebrow.

“ – Okay, fifty years younger than I am, I would be taking him for a spin myself. But since I’m not, I’ve decided that you should have him. Did I bend the truth a little? Yes. But for a good cause. I’m a very thoughtful person, you know.”

“You are outrageous,” you hiss, pacing as Mrs.Yun pretends to look for dirt under her fingernails. “This is a waste of public resources! They’re supposed to be responding to emergencies. Real emergencies.”

“First of all – ” Mrs. Yun is defiant, chin in the air, “ – Nothing ever happens in this town. Nothing. And second, there’s dust in your panties, sweetheart. If that’s not an emergency, I don’t know what is.”

Your mouth falls open in a silent scream and Mrs. Yun ignores it, climbing off the couch with ease to cross the room and crack open a window. She pulls a box out of the tiny accent table perched beneath it and proceeds to light an absurdly long cigarette.

“You’re too damned young to be shut away in your house all the time,” she argues, pursing her lacquered lips to blow a stream of smoke out the window. “Work. Couch. Work. Couch. How can you stand it? Let me tell you what I’d be doing right now if I could turn back the clock and have your youth again: Mr. Park. I’d be doing Mr. Park. You should be doing Mr. Park.”

You stifle a disbelieving laugh. The novelty of your neighbor’s loose lips and bad habits wore off a long time ago, but sometimes she still manages to catch you off guard.

“Well, I’ve got an early morning so unless you have any more unsolicited sex advice to share, I’m going to have to call it a night.”

Mrs. Yun blows another long stream of smoke out the window.

“Nope. I’ve got it all off my chest.”

“Good then,” you say, turning on your heels. You make it all the way to the door before you pause and call out to her.

“And put that thing out!”

🚨🚨🚨🚨

Three days later, you find yourself struggling with an overloaded paper bag from the grocery store. Yes, you’ve purchased the reusable ones and yes, they’re a hell of a lot stronger – but you never miss an opportunity to leave them hanging in the closet on your way out the door.

Something in the bag is wet – well, moist at the very least. And it’s enough to have you gripping the bottom tight with both hands as you try to maneuver your way through the revolving door at the entrance to your condo. It’s an awkward fit inside the narrow sliver of space and as you’re shuffling forward, the door’s momentum dies. You push at it with one foot and lose an onion from the bag, nearly losing your balance in the process.

You blow out a heavy breath and go to push the door again, only this time it smoothly glides away before you even make contact. The misstep makes you jerk forward, but at least the door keeps moving long enough for you to step out of it.

“Think you lost something back there.”

Most of your hair has slipped out of your ponytail holder by now, the strands matted to your forehead with the sweat you worked up on the walk from the car. But when you turn, you can still make out the glorious Mr. Park quite clearly. He drops the onion back into your bag and smiles at you.

“Please, allow me.”

He lifts the bag out of your arms, carefully securing the bottom like you’d done just moments before. With your hands now free, you push your hair out of your face and silently pray that you don’t look as unfortunate as you suspect you do.

“You don’t have to do that,” you demur. “But I appreciate it anyway. Mr. Park, right?”

“Well, I’d much prefer you call me Jimin,” he laughs, the sound of it making heat bloom inside your chest. “But yeah, it’s me again.”

He’s not wearing his uniform, you realize. And though some small part of you mourns the loss of those fitted shirts and pants, his off-duty look – an oversized sweater, jeans and pair of sharp boots – sure as hell doesn’t disappoint.

“Do you… live here?” you ask stupidly, as though a man this handsome could live anywhere on this entire street without someone taking notice. “Or – ”

“No, no,” he says quickly. “I came by to check on your neighbor. You know, after the fall and all. I told her she could call me if she ever needed anything and she asked me to stop by.”

“You gave – ” you pause, shock forcing your voice at least an octave higher, “ – You gave Mrs. Yun your phone number?”

His cheeks pink at the observation. “She’s in her 70s, you know? Lives alone. I really don’t mind.”

You truly have no idea how your chain-smoking, jazzercising, oversexed hellion of a next-door neighbor has managed to convince this man she’s a frail old woman in need of a hero.

Will wonders never cease?

“Besides,” he says, “She’s kind of...quirky, you know?”

“That’s a very strange way to say unhinged,” you counter.

He laughs.

“You’re funny. Come on, I’ll walk you up.”

yun: DID YOU HAVE YOUR FACE ON [ 9:15 PM ]

yun: he told me he helped you with your groceries [ 9:15 PM ]

yun: now tell him to help you out of your clothes [ 9:16 PM ]

you: go to bed [ 9:16 PM ]

Two days later, legs like noodles from spin class, you limp through your front door and sag onto the couch. You might have napped for a second, you’re not entirely sure – but after a knock sounds at your door, you are most definitely alert. Your thighs protest as you force yourself off the couch to answer it.

You crack the door open and it’s him. Adonis. Mr. Park. Jimin.

And you’re wearing a gray workout shirt with what you are certain is one very sizeable sweat stain down the front. Good God, will there ever be a time when you see this man and don’t look like a complete wreck?

“Oh my gosh, did she call you again?” you ask, incredulous. “You are so sweet to do this for her, really but this is too – ”

“ – She didn’t call,” he interrupts, looking just the tiniest bit bashful.

“Oh.”

“Listen, this is kind of embarrassing and maybe not entirely appropriate given I know where you live, but it’s just that I don’t have your number.”

Your eyes widen and your already distressed legs start to feel a bit more weak. Jimin scrubs a hand down his jaw before he speaks again.

“I was actually wondering if you might let me take you to dinner sometime.”

You blink.

“Or I could cook you dinner. I make this really great prawn dish? But again, I’m not trying to be a creep or anything and it’s okay if you’re not comfortable with that – ” he’s backpedaling now, his words coming out in a rush.

“– You are not a creep,” you insist, when you’ve finally come to your senses and figure out how to access your words and use them to form sentences. “I just – I was just not expecting that. But yes, I’d love to go to dinner with you.”

Your knees threaten to buckle at the slow smile that comes over him.

“That’s great.”

🚨🚨🚨🚨

You fling the silverware drawer open and practically rip Mrs. Yun’s key out of it in your mad dash to her apartment. No, you do not feel guilty for letting yourself into her house, the woman has absolutely no boundaries and could use a taste of her own medicine.

You slam the door behind you when you walk in, and Mrs. Yun squints at you from her perch in the window. She blows out a perfect ring of smoke and then raises a brow.

“Got a bee in your bonnet?”

“Give me one of those,” you demand. “Right now.”

🚨🚨🚨🚨

There’s a knock at your door – again – only this time, you already know who’s on the other side. It’s your beloved Doordash driver, bringing an order of your beloved shio ramen. Two, actually.

You open the door to grab your food and Jimin calls out from the couch.

“Need some help with that?”

“Nah, I’m good,” you say over your shoulder.

When you turn back to thank the Doordash guy, he’s staring into your living room, eyes wide and trained on Jimin. You clear your throat and he snaps his focus back to you.

“Have a good night,” he says pleasantly.

And then he gives you a thumbs up.

yun: can the two of you keep it DOWN [ 11:22 PM ]

yun: some of us need our beauty sleep [ 11:22 PM ]

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