imnotokayimok

[imnotokayimok]

SW- 170

GW 1- 165 lbs

GW 2- 160lbs

GW 3- 150lbs

GW 4- 145 lbs

GW 5- 135 lbs

GW 6- 129 lbs

GW 7- 125 lbs

GW 8- 120lbs

DONEEEE💗💗💗💗

[imnotokayimok]

ed Tumblr reblog if..

you are 18+

you are plant based

you are active as of Dec ‘22 / Jan ‘23

if ur a baddie

[imnotokayimok]

I just went and looked at my old body checks and wtf I’ve gotten so fattttttt. I really didn’t realize it cause my legs have gotten smaller since I haven’t been walking home anymore but my stomach no longer has the definition it used to and my waist is almost 30 in now wtf also just can’t believe I let myself go like this. I kinda want to cut my self and I’m almost 5 months clean from that shit but bro wtf who was gonna tell me I’m a whale?!)47;&$;$;

Also I can’t believe I’ve been doing this back and forth shot with Ana and Mia for almost 3 years now. I’m about to cry cause i was only successful like 3 times out of 3 years of this shit. I also pray too much. I say prayers to make my legs slimmer, and my legs are slimmer but now my stomach is huge. And last year my legs were huge but my stomach was slim because I would pray for a slim tummy. I don’t know how much of what I’m seeing is body dysmorphia or real. What if my legs are huge but I just think they are small?!;!;$;

[imnotokayimok]

LMAOOO I’m back. Tbh I wasn’t necessarily “recovering”, I just didn’t feel like I needed to lose weight anymore. I felt prettyy and I still do tbh. I don’t mind my body now even tho I am deadass almost 30 pounds heavier than I was last year. But I’m going to college in like 20 days 🫠. I want to be skinny and pretty, not chubby and prettty. And my roommate is skinny so like I neeeeeeeed to be skinny. But I really love eating and I always want to eat and cook because it makes me so happy. But idk wtf to do at this point. I kinda just want to starve and workout alottt everyday until I leave for move in. Then once I get there I’ll be too broke to buy all the food I want, and I’ll be walking alot since Im going ti uni were there like no cars. So hopefully ill be able to keep the weight off. It just is so fucking hard to start fml. But imma do it. I hope. I want to lose around 20 lbs in a month which would seem undoable in hindsight, but I’ve done it before soooo… wish me luck. All I have to do for this to work is drink a lot of water and burn every thing I eat. Imma start now. 

[imnotokayimok]

LOW RESTRICTING ALL SPRING BREAK LETS GOOOOOOOO.

Max for today-

200 Cals 💗🦋

#🦋 vent #an0rex1a #e 🦋 #🦋 anon #c 🦋 food

[imnotokayimok]

I binged😕

I purged too

Now I’m sad 😂

I feel like shit and I want to die I wish I never gained these habits. I just hate myself tbh

#🦋 vent

[imnotokayimok]

Liquid fasting today cause I binged yesterday😭

It was expected tho, I felt a bing coming on an I have literally no food in my house so I binged on fucking popcorn😞 I had around 1500 cals yesterday and burned 600. Imma try to low restrict the rest of this week and next week while still working my ass off 😂

Actually dying on the inside rn 💗

#🦋.txt #🦋 vent #c 🦋 thought #c 🦋 food #🦋 anon #🦋 #e 🦋 #🦋check

[imnotokayimok]

I did ok this weekend, imma start working out too, I did 20 mins of spin yesterday and burned almost 200 cals 😭💗

This week imma just fast at school like always and eat something high protein when I get home. Imma try to eat twice when I get home everyday so I prevent binging. Today I think imma eat eggs and rice when I get home, it’s deadass my favorite thing to eat 💀. Luckily, my mom never cooks anymore so her cooking is no longer an issue for me, in the height of my time here, she used to cook a lot and it would fuck me up sm I would end up purging hourly 😕. But not anymoreeeeeeee😻.

Anyways pls wish me luck, I’m feeling really happy since I haven’t been eating too much and I don’t want to stop.

#notprojustusehashtags #c 🦋 food #🦋.txt #🦋 vent #🦋 anon #🦋 #e 🦋 #c 🦋 thought #🦋food #🦋ana #🦋goals

[imnotokayimok]

I’m kinda happy rn which feels weird lol cause I ate a lot already 😭. But my mom wanted to go out to eat this morning and I had pancakes for 700 cals, but that’s all I’m eating today, and I don’t finish them sooo🤪. But I also am in agony rn cause I have feelings for someone I regected and my family doesn’t really approve so I have to just act like I don’t like him which sucks cause I do and HES SO FUCKING CUTE LIKE WTFFFFF. But all the more reason to restrict lol. I’m looking at it like this; If I restrict and lose weight u will be so pretty and happy to where I won’t care what others think and I’ll just do what I want, which is be with him💗. Lmao that makes no sense but what fucking ever, whatever I need to tell myself to keep on starving 😈

#🦋.txt #🦋 vent #🦋 anon #🦋 #e 🦋 #c 🦋 #🦋 tips #c 🦋 food #notprojustusehashtags #thinspii #low cal ana #thinspo #tw ed mention #tw ed related #tw ed stuff

[imnotokayimok]

I’m holding myself accountable…. I just binged :(. I had 2 day old Chinese takeout leftovers my parents brought home. It’s fucking 11 at night where I’m at and I’m fucking kissed that I just did that. I think I had around 500 and I already totaled at 763 before the binge 😞. FUCK MY LIFE BRO IM SO SAD RN

#🦋 tips #c 🦋 #butterfly 🦋 #e 🦋 #🦋 #🦋 anon #🦋 vent #🦋.txt

[imnotokayimok]

Does anyone else have fucking nightmares about binging when ur doing good restricting? Anytime I have restricted for 4 or more days in a row without any slip ups, I have nightmares about binging and then I wake up so fucking pissed.

#ed diet

[imnotokayimok]

Cutting hurts so good

#notprojustusehashtags #thinspii #low cal ana #thinspo #tw ed mention #tw ed related #tw ed stuff #an0rex1a #sh #$uicida1

[imnotokayimok]

Drowned out my urge to eat with 10 big ass cups of ice water 😼

#notprojustusehashtags #thinspii #low cal ana #thinspo #tw ed mention #tw ed related #tw ed stuff #an0rex1a

[imnotokayimok]

Failed today 😭 my fam got fucking pad tai noodles from my favorite place so fml. I’m going to try again tomorrow though. My cal limit is and always will be 800 so less no more. I think that is really reasonable for me to do and will not have me getting hunger pains any time soon. Pleas wish me luck I really need it 😩

#notprojustusehashtags #thinspii #low cal ana #tw ed mention #tw ed related #an0rex1c #an0rex1a

[imnotokayimok]

I’m back after like 4 months. I am doing really well mentally and I’m not really depressed anymore. I recovered and stop all of my self destructive habits until last week. I ate a lot last Wednesday and I coughed and my food kinda felt like it wanted to come up. And I’ve had that happen a lot but something about that day triggered TF outta me and I purged a hell of alot :( so here I am. I just want to lose 30 pounds. I am going to try my hardest to not purge because it is a literal depressant for me. Every time I purge I have horrible thoughts about myself and fucking flashbacks lmaoo. And I’m pretty happy to be alive rn and I don’t want to ruin that by purging. I feel so fake sometimes cause I can never stay restricting for long or stay at my low weights for more than a week. But I noticed during those 4 months how much my mindset and life was altered though this. Even when I wasn’t thinking about Ana or mia, I am constantly thinking about it in the back of my head. Every time I felt full, I had to fight the urge to purge: that rhymed 🤪: so ultimately Ik that I’m kinda actively self sabotaging but idc. I think as long as I don’t purge, I’ll be ok. I’m giving myself 6.5 weeks to do this 💗 by the end of that I want to be down like 15-20. I think that’s reasonable 😂

#notprojustusehashtags #an0rex1a #thinppi #thinspo #tw ed mention #tw ed related #low cal ana #tw ed stuff #thinspii

[imnotokayimok]

I already ate but I got the scale back and……….. I weighed 150! 15 pounds down 😁. And I might be less if I weigh tomorrow before I eat 😆

#notprojustusehashtags #low cal ana #tw ed mention #tw ed related #tw ed stuff #only pr0 for myself #thinspii #tw weight #ed things #thinspo

[imnotokayimok]

So today I had 688 and 75 carbs. Not too bad considering it’s after a fast. I really scared of fasting cause I always ended up binging the day after but this time I didn’t! Also I lost 3 inches off mg waist!!! I’m a true 28 now!! My waist goal is a 26 tho.

#notprojustusehashtags #low cal ana #tw ed mention #tw ed related #tw ed stuff #only pr0 for myself #thinspii #tw weight #ed things #thinspo