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clementinegreye · 4 days

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false god

spencer reid x fem!bau!reader

summary: it's never a good idea to reminisce about a relationship, especially one that ended with betrayal left you with a permanent scar

word count: 1.2k

warnings: angst, no happy ending, major character injury, talks of general CM related violence and murder (nothing graphic), jeid you squint but its not endorsed lol

a/n: wrote this in an hour when i was feeling sad. its not proof read and i lowkey don't love it but whomp whomp

She always thought that the ground looked so far away just after take-off. Everyone below looked like specs of dirt that you had to really focus on to see. How insignificant everything looked compared to the vastness of the sky above. The illusion of importance shattered by the cover of clouds.

Pulling the blind down she sat back in her seat, headphones drowning out the noise in her head. The jet was silent, too focused in quiet contemplation of the reading material in front of them.

Her body instinctively leaned slightly to the left, seeking the comfort it once found in his embrace. But the illusion was shattered, and she knew that no matter how much she wanted to, she could no longer lean into the familiarity. She pushed her body towards the window, forcing her eyes out to the clouds.

Her thoughts, once filled with his presence, felt unmoored.

Now she could focus wholly on work. But the space that thoughts of him once filled was now left behind and filled with a silence that echoed through her. She was alone with the sky, the clouds, the vast expanse of the world below, and her thoughts.

But now, the seat remained cold and empty. Even the scent of him, hugging her senses, used to be a source of comfort, was now a bitter reminder of the fallout between them. She hugged herself as if trying to fill the void as vast as the sky.

She forced herself to breathe, each inhale a sharp reminder of the love that was no longer hers. But it felt different now, hollow and cold as if the warmth he once provided had faded.

You see, Spencer Reid had broken her heart, and he’d done it easily.

Spencer Reid had chosen to protect someone else over her.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

The takedown was supposed to have been simple.

She turned her head slightly, the dust from the room seemed to have uprooted and created a cloud of mist. Morgan looked like he was running towards her. Why was he running towards her? Why was she on the ground? Why did everything feel so cold? It was the middle of July, she’d been warm in her Kevlar vest. Why were her fingers so so cold?

‘Agent down!’

The words echoed in her ears. It was as if the fog cleared and she tried to sit up, pain lit up her body like electricity before going numb. Suddenly everything seemed so silent. The world shifted, she could feel the cold concrete on her back as clearly as if it were in her bones.

Morgan was fast, it must have only taken him seconds to get to her. Which was odd, she’d been standing next to Spencer, but she couldn’t see him from her line of sight. She tried to force herself up again. only to be met with Morgan’s strong hands pushing on her shoulders.

‘No, don’t move.’ She turned her head to the side and through the haze of what was happening she saw something that made her eyebrows furrow in confusion. Maybe she’d hit her head. She must have hit her head.

Spencer was standing in front of JJ, his whole body poised like a shield protecting her. His arms around her shoulder, her hands gripping the front of his vest. Then the confusion unravelled like a loose thread, tugged on.

Spencer had moved to protect her. He’d left her side to protect JJ from the Unsub’s shooting. He’d actively moved further away from her to go and stand in front of JJ. But he wasn’t in love with JJ. He was supposed to be in love with her, so why had he gone out of his way to protect JJ? Was he in love with JJ?

They’d always been close, she knew that. But this? This felt more than friendship, you don’t dive in front of just a friend instinctively if the supposed love of your life is right there in the line of fire. Surely, your instinct is to follow your heart, is that what Spencer had done? Had he followed the true line of his heart?

She wanted to ask him why. Why he had done this? But her voice had deserted her, her throat drowned in icy silence. She felt the darkness creeping in, wrapping around her like a shroud.

The pain of the betrayal was raw, every nerve in her body seemed to buzz with it. She felt like a marionette whose strings had been cut, left to crumble under the weight of her realisation.

Morgan was next to her, holding her, placing his weight on her torso, he was lit up in a golden halo and his eyes looked like they were gleaming with fear and un-spilt tears.

‘Where’s the damn medic?!’ He shouted backwards in what must have been the general direction of the team.

‘It’s five minutes out.’ The voice was level, in charge. It must have been Hotch, but her eyes were getting too heavy to check.

She wanted to tell Morgan to stop looking so scared, to assure him she'd pull through like always, but the words died in her throat. Her breath hitched as a new wave of pain washed over her.

'Hang on,' Morgan pleaded, 'just hang on.'

She could hear Spencer, his voice sounded panicked, high pitched and his breathing thready. He was muttering something that sounded like an apology and a lot of cursing or praying to God. She couldn’t tell.

She wanted to reach out, to comfort him, but the strength had left her body. The edges of her vision were blurring, and the last thing she heard was Morgan's desperate plea echoing in her fading consciousness.

'Stay with us,' a voice commanded, each word punctuated with a raw desperation. But the darkness was too inviting, too persistent. And as the world around her faded, she couldn't shake off the sinking feeling that something irrevocably had changed.

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The hum of the engine lured her out of her memory. Maybe it was her fault. She’d loved Spencer like it was breathing, had worshipped at the altar of his love, only to find it empty. It was clear he hadn’t done the same, that convenience was simply his reason.

The false god she had created of him had fallen, shattered into pieces. The truth of his mortality, his flawed humanity, had never been so palpable. The feeling was both liberating and terrifying.

She looked out at the sky and the world below, the vast expanse seeming to mirror the emptiness within her. Emptiness echoed in her ears, filling her with a sense of loss that was almost unbearable.

The scar below her left collarbone throbbed beneath her shirt, it could almost be mistaken for heartache.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fic #criminal minds angst #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfiction #cm fanfiction #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x self insert

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clementinegreye · 13 days

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mom and dad😌

#they’re so parents #criminal minds

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clementinegreye · 20 days

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hello! i haven't posted in a while so here's sneak peek of the new spencer angst story 'false god' that i'm working on! eeek!!

His scent still lingered, he’d spent so long in the seat next to her that it must have melded with the fabric. A mix of pine and the cold winter morning air. She closed her eyes, a single tear escaping, sliding down her cheek. She was left with nothing but the ghost of his presence, a cruel reminder of what once was. Now, the seat remained cold and empty. Even the scent of him, hugging her senses, used to be a source of comfort, was now a bitter reminder of the fallout between them. She hugged herself, as if trying to fill the void as vast as the sky. You see, Spencer Reid had broken her heart, and he’d done it easily. Spencer Reid had chosen to protect someone else over her.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid angst #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds angst #spencer reid hurt/comfort

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clementinegreye · 29 days

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the sweetest sin of all || part 2

aaron hotchner x fem!bau!reader ||

summary: part two! in the midst of investigating a serial killer who chooses victims based on the seven deadly sins, aaron hotchner finds himself entangled in more than just the case (inspired by hozier's song 'too sweet') - read part one here

word count: 2.6k

warnings: obesession, kissing, crossing professional boundaries and general talks of CM violence and murder (nothing graphic):

a/n: hi! in a surprise turn of events my friend requested a sequel. so here she is!

Sunlight bathed the office in warmth, casting long shadows across the room. The brightness of the new day offered a similar newness to what Aaron was feeling in his chest. A glow from within, matching the sky of optimism. How was it that after finally giving into sin he was being rewarded with such virtue?

With newfound clarity, Aaron saw the remaining sins in a new light, no longer as abstract concepts, but as human desires that ran deep within all of us. He thought of envy - the yearning for what someone else had, wrath - the uncontrollable fury born out of injustice, and lust - the overwhelming desire for another. He understood, perhaps for the first time, the power these emotions held, and the destruction they could bring when left unchecked.

He found himself drawn to the memory of lust - the overwhelming desire for another. It was a sin he'd experienced first-hand, a sin that had changed him irrevocably, a wickedness he had no intention of seeking redemption for.

He allowed himself to be drawn to the unholy memory of the night before, eyes falling closed. It felt as though he’d never left the office. The bullpen outside his internal windows began to buzz and hum with the life of his colleagues arriving freshly rested and ready to reface the case.

Surrounded by the remnants of the night, he let out a deep breath, his mind wandering back to the sweet taste of her lips, the feel of her body against his, and the soft whispers of their shared passion still echoing in the room. This was their shared iniquity, their secret temptation, a dance of desire they had surrendered to.

He could still smell the faint hint of her perfume in the air, the lingering scent of her dancing around his office. He was surrounded by the remnants of their night. He sighed deeply, flooding his senses with everything that had transpired over the last 24 hours. There was a watermark ring imprinted on his desk from their shared glass, subtle reminders of their hidden transgression.

His heart hammered in his chest at the thought of her, a sweet symphony of debauchery and his personal surrender. He traced the watermark with his finger, the texture grounding him, reminding him that it wasn't a dream. This was their secret, a clandestine dance only they knew the steps to. The memory of her gentle touch still lingering on his skin, he felt a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

He was pulled from his thoughts by Morgan, his firm knock at the door reminding him that he had work to do and that there was still a killer that he should be focused on. Noticing Hotch’s unusually dreamy expression, Morgan eyed him suspiciously. The ability to read body language was a profiler’s best weapon, and Morgan was looking at him with knives in his gaze.

‘What’s going on?’ His voice was firm but even. Aaron felt like it could lead to an interrogation if he didn’t pull himself together, but with her scent in his head and the memory of her on his lips, it was harder than he would like to admit.

Before a response could leave his lips, his gaze was drawn to the sight of her walking into the bullpen, the memory of their shared secret making his heart race anew. He quickly composed himself, turning back to Morgan with a steely gaze, ready to face the day and with newfound confidence ready to catch the son of a bitch before he could take another sin as victim.

Taking a deep breath, he nodded curtly at Morgan, his voice steady as he said, "Let's get to work." He stood from his desk, posture straight as a soldier. He moved to follow Morgan with surety towards the roundtable where the team had gathered in quiet conversation.

He traced his fingers over the corners of the files in his hands. Each one was a call to action, a reminder of the duty he owed to the victims and their families. Yet, beneath the weight of responsibility, he found a new source of strength - her. Her words echoed in his head, her tone of confidence pushing him with a passion and determination he had never known before.

As he stepped into that circle of familiar faces, he allowed himself one last lingering glance at her - she was as bright as the morning that shone through the window. With a renewed sense of purpose, he began discussing their next steps in the case, her presence and the memory of her certainty; a powerful source of inspiration.

He could feel her gaze on him as he laid out the details of the case. Her eyes traced over his features and he could swear he could feel her touch. The presence of their shared secret added a new layer to the dynamic, a furtive thrill that spurred him on. He could almost feel the anticipation in the room, the team ready to delve into the depths of the details printed in front of them.

A sense of camaraderie filled the room as they all settled into their roles, ready to tackle the challenge that lay ahead. Each member of the team settled into their familiar rhythm which made their team unique. Hotch sat in his chair, eyes glancing over the summary of the crime, he could feel the weight in the room on his shoulders.

He felt wrapped up in more than just the case. He’d settled back into his dominance and role as team leader, but he hadn’t quite shaken the thrill of letting go, and he was excited by the chance to do it again once the case was over. The memory of her touch, the echo of their whispered promises, strengthened his desire to solve the case. Hotch felt an unfamiliar lightness, a secret sweet sense he could hold close to his chest that could drive him to catch the killer.

‘Garcia still hasn't been able to uncover any kind of paper trail linking the victims together.’ Spencer spoke, his voice typically rushed but there was a twinge of frustration, he pushed his hair from his face in a flurry. There was a pause amongst the team, a collective moment of thought.

'Perhaps the Unsub is choosing victims based on personal encounters, not premeditated selections.' She added. Hotch had already been looking at her, but with the sweet sound of her voice, the rest of the team’s eyes followed where his gaze rested. Hotch’s watch flicked away from her for a moment as if scared his colleagues would see the intensity in his eyes. With the attention on her, she continued. 'I know it’s hard but maybe we should focus on potential spontaneous interactions the victims might have had.’

Amid the team's collective returned concentration to the evidence, he couldn't help but steal another glimpse at her. The soft glow of her skin, the vehemence of her gaze as she poured over the case files in front of her - she had looked at him that intensely. He couldn't dwell on it too long or his mind would be flooded with all reminders of their shared connection.

'Let's explore that possibility then,' he said, his voice steady despite the rapid beating of his heart. He could sense they were onto something, a familiar drum in his chest caused by trust.

The morning sunlight seemed to brighten and illuminate the room with a renewed sense of determination. The team worked diligently, diving headfirst into the mire of possibilities and potential leads.

‘We know he’s focusing on the seven deadly sins to guide his mission but perhaps one of them is what he focuses on to find his victims and then he assigns them another.’ JJ mused, looking over some of the victim reports. ‘I mean, look at this, two out of the four had at one time used the same hook-up site, the other two might have used a different form of online dating site.’

‘He’s focusing on lust.’ She stated factually, and Hotch’s ears burned at the tips.

‘How can you tell, honey? The victims are different genders, different physicality's and different races? There’s no distinct type. How can you tell his motive is sexual?’ Morgan quipped, curiosity in his husky tone. Pet name making Hotch’s mouth twitch.

'If all of the victims so far were active on at least one form of online dating site.' She answered, her voice steady. 'And if you consider the sin of lust, it's about a strong sexual desire. Online dating, especially sites used for hook-ups, could be where the Unsub is selecting his victims. Maybe he’s using different aliases’ on different sites, which could be why we haven’t been able to find any similar connections.' Her words hung in the air, a new avenue of investigation opening up before them.

This new lead could be the breakthrough they needed. 'Let's pursue this angle. Everyone, start digging into each victim's online footprint, especially their activities on dating platforms.' Hotch commanded his voice firm yet tinged with a hint of excitement. He stole a second to look at her, her words still echoing in his mind from the night before. He felt a sudden confidence that they would catch the Unsub, just as she had said.

The Unsub's sanity mirrored Aaron’s own, he too was thinking of lust. His eyes remained trained on her once the team were back at their desks working the new angle. But where the Unsub's actions led to destruction, his had led to connection, a bond that invigorated him. He was living within a paradox, sinning in one breath and upholding justice in the next, he wouldn't trade this newfound complexity for anything.

He was drawn from his thoughts by the muffled voices of Spencer and Morgan.

Spencer was gesticulating wildly with his hands, his eyes filled with the spark of new evidence. Morgan, ever the listener, nodded along with a thoughtful expression, calling on the other members of the team to gather around. This was their rhythm, their way of working through the intricacies of the case, they were a well-oiled machine.

‘Guys, the kid’s got something.’ Morgan’s voice was clear across the bullpen, a sense of urgency running through it as the members of the team stood from their respective desks to gather around and listen.

Spencer cleared his throat, all eyes on him as he started unravelling his newfound evidence. His words filled the silence, a new rhythm in their symphony of investigation. The rush of the new lead, another piece of the puzzle.

‘Garcia and I looked over some of the victim’s online accounts and I think we’ve found something.’ He gestured in a typically enthusiastic manner, voice hitching in animation from the breakthrough. Once the team were hooked on his words he continued his explanation.

'While on different sites we found that each victim had a private chat with a user and their IP address can be linked to multiple accounts. Each account had an avatar with hidden messages and symbols related to the seven deadly sins.' His revelation echoed through the room, pushing them one step closer to uncovering the Unsub. ‘We know where he is.’

As Spencer spoke, Aaron didn’t try to hide the glance he shared with her, their eyes meeting for a fleeting moment. She’d been right. Of course, she’d been right.

His gaze was still on her when Morgan's voice echoed through the room, "Then let's bring him in.’ With a tilt of her head, she smiled at Hotch, a true and natural smile that made him feel like he was on fire. It was a smile that declared ‘How could you ever doubt me?’.

The room buzzed with renewed energy as everyone began to mobilize. Garcia worked her magic in the background to send the location and information they needed to their phones. This was it, the moment they had been working towards. The moment they would finally stop the killer before he took any more lives.

***

With the Unsub in custody, the team had headed back to the office, each slowly slipping away for the night, ready for a peaceful night’s rest knowing they had another success under their belt. From the security of his office, Hotch breathed a deep sigh. He was about to file away the closed case file, his back to his office door.

‘I told you.’

Her voice startled him, but it was not an unwelcome feeling. He didn't turn, he didn’t need to. He heard her heels stepping across the floor, heading to where he stood. He let her words wash over him, a sweet affirmation of their shared victory. He closed his eyes, absorbing the moment - the scent of her perfume, her voice, their shared triumph. She placed both hands on his shoulders, pulling on the right slightly so he’d turn to face her.

‘I remember.’ He spoke, low and deep. Lifting a hand to push a strand of hair from her face. She captured his hand in hers before it could fall. A strong and certain

‘Is that all you remember of last night?’ She tilted her head - intertwining her fingers with his - a smirk toying on her lips. He couldn’t think about anything other than how she tasted.

His eyes met hers, a spark igniting deeply within him. His senses were flooded with her. He didn’t think, he simply leaned in, capturing her lips with his.

Releasing the grip on his hand so he could hold her waist she moved her hands from his shoulders she tangled them in his hair, tugging lightly inciting a low moan from his throat. She was pulling him impossibly closer, their bodies sharing the same heat.

He didn't want to stop - to break the connection. But he knew they had to. He pulled back reluctantly, his breath hitching as he looked into her eyes. Darkened with the tension between them. He was lost in her, consumed by a sin that tasted so sweet.

He was a man who had always held onto his composure. But with her, he was willing to let go, a man falling, and he knew he would willingly drown in her.

He wanted her. More than he’d ever wanted anything in his life. He’d do anything to have her. He would repent, he would go to confession every Sunday and live the most virtuous existence.

‘God, save me.’ He whispered, breath fanning across her lips as they remained inches apart. More tangled together than separated.

‘Did you suddenly turn religious, Aaron?’ She giggled, hand tracing down the side of his face, mapping out his strong features. Her intoxicating laugh echoed through the empty office, a sound he wanted to become familiar with. He craved the softness, the sweet taste of her lips again, and again, and again. He’d do anything to hear the symphony of surrender he could find in her.

His response was non-verbal. he simply let his lips find hers again, their bodies pulling each other into a dance as old as the world itself, but as new and thrilling as the first time. He was used to bitter coffee, cold showers and his mind being corrupted with murder. She was new, she was all sunlight and syrupy covering his senses and submerging him in damnation.

He was a man lost, a man found - in her. Her, the sweetest sin, his only redemption. She was a vice that tasted like heaven.

Aaron Hotchner was a sinner, she would be his redemption.

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #aaron hotchner fic #hotch x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner fanfic

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clementinegreye · 29 days

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Reblog if you are okay with people giving you lots of boops!

#boop!

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clementinegreye · 29 days

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their friendship is everything to me

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clementinegreye · 30 days

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safer dreams

spencer reid x fem!bau!reader ||

summary: it's not easy to keep someone safe in your nightmares, something Spencer knows all too well.

word count: 2.3k

warnings: fluff || there was only one bed || brief talks of CM themes (nothing graphic)

Exhaling slowly and processing what she could see in front of her, she let out a small huff of frustration. Her feet ached and her back felt tense from the day. The team had pinned down their current Unsub’s geographical profile which had led them on a tense chase which, had it not been for Spencer’s quick trigger finger, might have ended with her meeting a bullet.

After such an intense case the team had decided to stay the night in a local motel and hit the runway early in the morning. Hotch had insisted, they all needed a night to rest and decompress before they had to go back and meet the paperwork waiting for them in Virginia.

All she wanted was to crawl into bed and rest her muscles. But of course, nothing ever happened that smoothly. There hadn’t been enough rooms for everyone at the motel, meaning everyone had to double up. It wasn’t something they hadn’t done before, and over the phone, the motel owner had promised the rooms all had twin beds.

The day had been exhausting, and now she realised after taking in the room in front of her that she had another problem to deal with.

Spencer let the door shut behind him as he came up behind her. Letting his go bag drop to the floor with a light thud. He flexed his fingers allowing the circulation to come back to where the straps of his bag had cut it off.

‘What’s wron… Oh,’ His own eyes caught the layout of the hotel room and landed on exactly what caused his co-worker’s reaction.

The room was small, the door to the bathroom tucked into the corner to the left of the entrance, there was no room for a desk or table but they’d squeezed in a small two-seater sofa. The burgundy plush carpet radiated the warm glow from the bedside lights and cast the room in a cosy ambience. But there was a problem, clearly just a miscommunication with the booking.

One bed.

‘I’ll go back to the front desk; I swear Hotch told me the motel owner told him earlier that there were twin beds for the team.’ He knew it was simply a case of human error. A case of mixed-up keys and booking information. It really wasn’t a big deal, so why did it feel like such a big deal?

‘Spence, we knew we already had to double up, and they had a no vacancies sign.’ She sighed, allowing her feet to travel across the carpet to the other side of the room. ‘It’s fine.’

‘Maybe they gave us the wrong room, I’m sure they can swap…’ His reasoning was futile, he didn’t need to be a genius to realise there was no negotiating with a no vacancies sign. It was almost like he was trying to talk himself down from a ledge, trying to make sense in his mind the panic he was feeling rising in his chest.

‘It’s almost 2 am. If it was a mistake, I’m sure the couple who have our twin beds are fast asleep.’ She had her back to him, facing the small sofa.

She dropped her own go bag on the blush cushion and stretched her arms above her head. The movement caused her shirt to rise just enough that a sliver of her back hit the light, showing two distinct dimples at the bottom of her spine. The image caught Spencer’s eye. It was an innocent move, but his gaze felt all too intimate. With the proximity of the four walls surrounding them, and the quietness of the room it caused an irregular beat in his heart that he was certain was audible and he snapped his eyes away. He swallowed thickly, glaring at the threadbare curtains shutting out the beams of moonlight.

‘We’re the FBI.’ He spoke almost factually as if the authority of the title could force the hotel to rouse a sleeping couple and get them to move rooms, simply for the convenience of guarding his own feelings.

‘Spence. It’s fine with me if it’s fine with you.’ Her voice was quiet, tiredness lacing its way into her speech. She rubbed a hand up her forearm absentmindedly, and if Spencer was in the right mind to focus on profiling her behaviour, he might have deduced that the action was caused by nerves.

‘If what’s fine?’ He stuttered, his brain not quite working to its usual capacity when he met her tired eyes. She raised an eyebrow, almost annoyed but not quite committed enough to it.

‘The bed. We can share for one night. It’s just one night.’ His eyes held a panicked glint. She wasn’t to know that the problem wasn’t that he was going to have to share a bed with her. The problem was he was worried she’d realise exactly how much he wanted to share a bed with her. His lack of response made her uneasy. Spencer Reid was very rarely lost for words. ‘If you’re uncomfortable I can sleep on the sofa.’

‘It’s tiny, and you almost got shot today…’ He stammered, suddenly regaining control of his runaway thoughts long enough to register the lengthy silence between them. She nodded, almost shyly, and his throat closed as he realised how she’d inferred his words. ‘I’m not uncomfortable, don’t sleep on the sofa. There’s no way I can let you sleep on the sofa. There’s enough room for both of us in the bed.’

There was a pause, a shift within the room as if the atmosphere had moved. A gentle smile crept across her face, and it managed to relax Spencer. The lamplight cast a golden haze across the room and her face looked angelic in the low lighting. A breathy sigh left her lips with the force of an almost chuckle.

They settled into their respective evening routines, turning off their lights in tandem before letting sleep wash over them as gently as the ocean.

___

Spencer jolted awake after feeling a swift kick to his shin. Panic ripped through his body as his eyes scanned the moonlit room. He couldn’t see any imminent danger and his brain fought through the fog of post-sleep confusion. His senses kicked in and he instinctively reached a hand across the bed in search of her. She was shaking, sighs and almost gasps slipping through her lips at a barely audible volume.

He held his breath while he watched her movements waiting. Her shaking continued, a strangled mix of a moan and a yelp left her throat and her arm shot out searching for something. Spencer’s heart picked up its pace, his brows furrowed in concern. He considered reaching for the light but before his sleep-drenched body could she sobbed, a garbled, purely fearful ‘no’.

She tossed side to side so violently Spencer thought she might throw herself from the bed. Without overthinking it he sat up and leaned over her. His body halted the thrashing movements and, in her sleep, she grabbed his bicep with wincing firmness.

He held her, with gentleness and enough security that she couldn't throw herself around. One hand went to her hip the other held himself up. Her eyes shot open, sparkling in the darkness with the wetness of un-spilled tears, a scream stuck in her throat, retreating when her eyes recognised Spencer’s soft gaze above her.

‘Hey... Hey, it’s okay. It was just a nightmare. You’re okay.’ He breathed, hovering above her, he moved his hand from her waist to rest it at the side of her head as if to hold her in place and stop her from injuring herself. Her hand gripped his bicep loosely, the thin material of his pyjama shirt soft between the pads of her fingers. Her breathing matched the rapid beat of her heart and Spencer - without thinking - lifted his hand from the pillow to stroke the side of her face.

It was meant to be comforting, to show her that she wasn’t alone. But the gesture, in the cool pooling light of the late hour, seemed entirely too intimate. He watched as her breathing began to slow and her fear slipped out as a quiet whimper, leaving her in the quiet safety of their shared room, their shared bed.

‘I’m here…’ Spencer whispered, his hand lightly tracing the shape of her face. He felt a strange tightness in his chest as he watched her slowly find her way back to reality, her grip on his arm lessening.

His gaze lingered on her face, taking in the softness of her features in the dim light. The silence was deafening, yet comforting, a shared moment of vulnerability and intimacy in the aftermath of her nightmare. "You're safe," he reassured her, his voice barely a whisper in the quiet room.

He could smell her perfume, it mingled with the dusty smell of the motel, sweet and undeniably her. He didn't know how long they stayed like that; the seconds ticked by with no accountability. The moment felt suspended in time, her eyes went from glassy to sparkling in the pale light and he felt her relax under him. He finally pulled away, his hand lingering in the space between them for a moment before he retreated to his side of the bed, the echo of her nightmare still lingering in the quiet room.

It was Spencer’s turn for his heart to hammer in his chest. Her breathing had steadied and she shifted, hand stretching out to find Spencer's in the empty space between them. The reigniting of contact made Spencer's breath hitch in his throat. He turned to face her, but the fear in her eyes was replaced with something else. He didn't have to be a profiler to know what that look meant. It was the same look that haunted his own reflections.

At that moment, under the soft glow of the moonlight spilling through the window, Spencer thought how pretty she looked. Silence spilt between them, she swallowed gently, blinking her eyes rapidly to quell any tears building.

‘You kept me safe.’ Her voice came out as a whisper, a kind of admission with more behind it than just the nightmare.

Her words hung in the air, a quiet acknowledgement of the intimacy of the moment. He didn’t respond, because for once he didn’t know how to. He didn’t have a statistic or fact to explain how he felt at that moment. Instead, he squeezed her hand gently, a quiet acknowledgement.

‘Do you get them often?’ He whispered, genuine concern lacing through, the warmth seeping from his chest to his fingers where if he focused, he could feel her pulse. He wasn't sure if she'd even want to talk about it.

She paused, her gaze dropping to where their hands were intertwined. 'More often than I'd like.' Her voice was barely more than a whisper, a vulnerability seeping into her words that Spencer had never heard before. He realised just how close they were in that moment. So close he could see the exact shade of her eyes and the way her brow furrowed when she felt she was being too honest. She always seemed so confident, especially at work.

Being vulnerable was not a luxury many could afford in the BAU.

'And what about you, Spencer?' she asked, her gaze meeting his again. 'Do you ever have nightmares?' It was an unexpected question, one that caught him off guard.

'Sometimes,' he admitted, the truth slipping out before he could stop it. Her fingers lightly tightened around his as if bracing for impact. He squeezed his eyes shut, thinking of his night terrors.

‘What are they about?’ She breathed, in a hushed way that sounded like she was almost afraid to ask.

‘You.’ His answer was faster and breathier than enunciated. As if that might take away from the confessional impact.

‘You have nightmares about me?’ She took a genuine pause, letting go of his hand and sitting up slightly so she was resting on her elbows looking down at him. He scrunched the duvet up in his now empty palm, holding himself.

‘No! Not about you. I mean, yes about you. About losing you. Like today, I thought I was going to lose you today, and without you, it’d be unbearable. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you like I do in my nightmares.’ His words were a whisper in the stillness of the night. Rambled at his usual speed as if the pace would disguise the weight of the feeling rising in his chest. It was panic, mixed with almost shame.

‘But you kept me safe.’ She stated, reaching out to unfurl his hand from the covers as if taking tension away from him like autumn takes the leaves from trees.

‘I don’t always manage to in my dreams.’ He sighed, looking up at her through his lashes. She was quite beautiful and in that second it scared him how much he cared.

"I guess we'll just have to keep each other safe, then," she murmured, a soft, genuine smile tugging at her lips. She rested a hand on his cheek and he instinctively leaned into her, as agreement settled over his features.

Spencer placed a hand atop hers as it stroked his face with more tenderness than he was sure he’d ever experienced. "I guess we will," he smiled a true and honest smile that happily made a home across his whole face.

They fell into a comfortable silence, and she lay back down beside him, this time with no space separating them. Their hands fell to their sides, fingers instinctively finding each other and intertwining. The fear and tension of the nightmare had evaporated, leaving the quiet intimacy that the two had just shared.

Sleep began to reclaim them and they both felt safer next to each other just from the knowledge that they’d be there, ready to protect each other from whatever nightmares the future held.

#criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x you #spencer reid one shot #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid headcanon #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid imagine

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clementinegreye · 1 month

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clementinegreye's masterlist and navigation station:

REQUESTS: OPEN!

you can make requests or simply come chat to me; here

💌 criminal minds:

🍋 aaron hotchner

the sweetest sin of all || 3.4k

the sweetest sin of all (part 2) || 2.6k

who'd have thought aaron hotchner was a man so consumed by longing (lightly inspiredin the midst of investigating a serial killer who chooses victims based on the seven deadly sins, aaron hotchner finds himself entangled in more than just the case (inspired by hozier's new song 'too sweet'):

more coming soon!

🌷spencer reid

safer dreams || 2.3k

it's not easy to keep someone safe in your nightmares, something Spencer knows all too well.

false god || 1.2k

it's never a good idea to reminisce about a relationship, especially one that ended with betrayal left you with a permanent scar

some stuff about me and my writing below the line:

about me: hi! my name’s soph, im 23 and an aquarius.

some quick fire facts about me; i’m a cat person, i have a chronic illness, get anxious a lot and my favourite show is criminal minds (in case you couldn’t tell), im trying to get back into reading this year, i have an abnormal amount of jellycats (yes the soft toys) and i love fruit (all fruit)! 🍋‍🟩🍓🍒🍊

i’ve been writing since i was 15 and i’ve been posting my work for a few years now, albeit under different blogs and i post some of my stories on Ao3, which i’ll link below.

writing/requests notes and guidelines:

i currently only write for criminal minds. i’m happy to write angst, fluff, hurt/comfort etc. just be specific in the ask what you’d like and i can try accommodate it!

i use she/her pronouns and therefore feel comfortable writing from that perspective (or gender neutral.m). i’m hesitant to write male!reader as i don’t want to inaccurately portray something i have no experience with.

as a guideline i definitely won’t write anything containing rape, incest or child abuse, non-consensual sex or anything including minors or those underage. i am also hesitant to write abusive situations.

i’ve never written smut but if the topic came up i guess i could give it a go. i would just have to be comfortable with the context and the setting. if you’re request it and i don’t write it, i’m probably not comfortable with it. 🌷☁️🐚

my requests are OPEN and right now and i’ll write for any criminal minds character (i’m most used to writing for spencer and hotch, but i’ll give anything a try) if you want to request something or even just come have a chat and get to know me better my inbox is always open!

i always appreciate feedback and comments, likes and reblog also! but if you just fancy reading something go ahead, there’s no pressure on this blog to interact, it’s always appreciated but i know how i sometimes interact with things on tumblr so i understand. 🌟

note: i do not support AI or using AI to write, i’ve been practicing writing for many years and i think it’s a shame to use it and it feels like it undervalues the hard work people put in to writing. while AI might be a useful tool for some things my writing does NOT include it and my writing is my own. (i do use grammarly to check my spelling because i can be a silly goose and miss things because i edit all my fics myself but that’s it). my works are only posted here on this blog and on Ao3, if you see them somewhere else please let me know. 🩷

you can also find my work here on Ao3:

#criminal minds #spencer reid #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds imagine #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner #criminal minds masterlist #masterlist #soph writes #spencer reid imagine #aaron hotchner fanfiction #criminal minds writer #emily prentiss #derek morgan #penelope garcia #jennifer jareau

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clementinegreye · 1 month

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the sweetest sin of all

aaron hotchner x fem!bau!reader ||

summary: in the midst of investigating a serial killer who chooses victims based on the seven deadly sins, aaron hotchner finds himself entangled in more than just the case (inspired by hozier's new song 'too sweet'):

word count: 3.4k

warnings: heavy tension, hurt comfort, crossing professional boundaries and general talks of CM violence and murder (nothing graphic):

a/n: hi! i wrote this entire thing for a friend, but maybe you might enjoy it too! this is my first piece of writing on this new blog so if you like feel free to like, reblog or even just let me know! and hopefully if it goes well there'll be more soon!

a/n update: it went well, here's part two!)

From the dim lighting of the office it was almost impossible to tell the exact lateness of the night. His watch consistently ticking, remained a steady rhythm. He ran a hand across his face, his tie undone and lying, long discarded on his desk. The first few buttons of his shirt undone, unbuttoned and an almost vulnerable step away from his usual armour. Papers containing violence were spread haphazardly and with chaos across his desk. A nearly forgotten glass of strong neat whiskey sat in place of his usual bitter coffee.

His team had been on the case for nearly a week, and Hotch felt they were no closer to catching the Unsub. The whole team was feeling the pressure. The profile told him they were dealing with a moral enforcer, a highly organised, violent offender with a clear mission. It should have been easy for them but bodies seemed to be continuously appearing and everyone was feeling uneasy and frustrated.

He was drowning in the details of this case, the Unsub's pattern ever-present in his mind. He thought of the remaining sins - envy, wrath, and lust - and something burned deep within his chest. It was a dangerous game they played, one where the stakes were higher than any case he'd ever worked on.

Being head of the team he felt the responsibility more vehemently than the rest, and he was doing something he’d promised the team he wouldn’t. He was letting it get to him.

There’d been four victims so far, each killed to match one of the seven deadly sins. So far his victims had been; gluttony - an overzealous upscale restaurant critic who binged food that he slated publicly, greed - a high-profile stock broker with the inability to control his obsession with obtaining more of his client's money, sloth - a wealthy trust fund baby who squandered their university scholarship out of laziness and pride - a wealthy woman with a shopping addiction who frequented beauty salons and had an intense social media presence flaunting herself.

Each victim came from a different geographical area of the city and Garcia hadn’t been able to uncover any crossover between their lives where it might have been somewhere they could have met the Unsub. There were no leads and the team felt at a loss.

Knowing the Unsub was three victims away from the end of his mission, Hotch knew they were close to losing him if they didn’t catch a break soon. He’d sent the team home to get some sleep and told them to be ready bright and early the next day. Yet Hotch couldn't bring himself to leave the office, hoping the crime scene photos might uncover something he'd missed. He thought everyone had listened to his orders until he was drawn away from the graphic images in front of him by a gentle knock at the door.

"Come in." He croaked harshly, the hours of not speaking catching up to his vocal chords.

It was her. Of course, it was her.

She always had a way of pulling him from the edge, of grounding him when the world became too much. In the chaos and uncertainty of their work, she was his constant, his unwavering beacon of light. She was his solace, his calm in the storm, and in that moment, he allowed himself to get lost in her.

She was like honey, dripping out and pooling where flies could get stuck on the intoxication and drown. He could feel it, the danger she could be. If he’d been a man less controlled he could see how she could be his every downfall and triumph. In her, he saw a reflection of all his desires and fears. She was every strength and weakness. In the moment, he couldn't help but want to drown in the intoxicating allure of her, his deadly and dangerous, yet irresistibly sweet sin.

‘I’m heading home for the night…’ Her voice trailed off in a quiet hush to match the silence of the office.

The creases in his forehead from pouring over crime scenes and endless theories seemed to smooth out. He breathed out hours' worth of tension in a single breath, allowing the corners of his mouth to turn upwards so quickly that unless she’d been a profiler paying attention she might not have noticed. The way his body language shifted was subtle enough to the untrained eye, but not to her. He couldn’t conceal himself in his controlled, cold-edged front as well as he usually could when she was around.

"I gave those orders hours ago." He mused, leaning back in his chair, the breath of a sigh dying on his lips.

She gently shook her head, a soft laugh escaping her. "I thought you might be used to me defying your orders by now, Hotch. You should take your own advice, didn’t you promise to stop working so late," she replied, a glint in her eyes that held an irresistible challenge. Their playful banter was a welcome change from the dark seriousness that he’d been so consumed by moments ago.

She smiled, her eyes sparkling with mischief waiting for his retort.

"I didn’t promise anything." He huffed.

She didn’t wait for an invitation, she didn’t need to. Crossing the threshold of his office and making her way to the imposing desk of the Unit Chief.

She’d not seen her boss look so troubled by a case in a long time. Her gaze was drawn to him as his elbows leaned against the desk, his usually impeccable suit dishevelled. She noted the way the top buttons of his shirt were undone, revealing a hint of the man beneath the stoic FBI Unit Chief. It was a stark contrast to the man who was always put together, always in control. Yet, in that moment, he looked anything but. Not yet unravelled, but on the edge of it.

She moved further into the office, she was not someone who second-guessed her decisions. She walked with confidence, and perched herself on the edge of his desk, letting her legs dangle over the edge her black work trousers tight across her thighs. She rested her hand on the desk, dangerously close to her Hotch’s, mere centimetres.

His gaze shifted from the papers in front of him and followed the contours of her face, lingering a moment too long on her lips. He swallowed hard, his mind flickering with thoughts he'd held at bay for far too long. But he was Unit Chief, and professionalism might as well have been his middle name. He lightly shook his head, feeling the back of his eyes burn from the focus he’d had all day.

Hotch wasn’t one to open up, he was always controlled but around her, there was a tug at the stitches of his personality.

‘I have a bad feeling about this case.’ He hummed, the night breeze catching against the window. He could smell her perfume, mixing with the scent of burnt coffee and paper. He dare not think about it too long.

He reached across his desk and grabbed his near-forgotten whiskey, downing it in one drag. He bent towards where her legs were hanging over his desk, motioning for her to lift them. She drew them up towards her chest and he opened the drawer beneath her pulling an expensive-looking bottle from it and refilling the glass, this time handing it to her. Their fingers grazed slightly with the exchange. His warm, hers icy cold - meeting to form the perfect temperature.

‘We have no leads. I always trust the profile, but this case… We’ve got nothing.’ His eyes watched her as she swirled the liquid around the glass, her eyes watching it splash against the sides. He sighed in defeat, rubbing his eyes with both of his hands before leaning his head back, a deep exhale exiting his thin lips.

‘We’ll get him.’ She said confidently, something shifted in her tone. It was like a dagger's sharp edge, certainty dripping off it like blood. He almost believed her, but she could see the already dim light dissipating from his dark eyes. She felt sympathy pooling in the tips of her fingers. If she didn’t hadn’t been holding their shared glass she might have reached out and touched him so that it could bleed from her into him, so that he would feel less alone.

She leaned back slightly, her eyes searching his. It was unclear what she was searching for in them. He couldn’t read her entirely, even with all his years of profiling. When she smiled, he felt his heart catch in his throat. It was like looking directly at the sun. Burning and bright hot.

‘You should follow your own orders… And for once so should I. Go home. Get some rest.’ She downed the liquid with a swift tip of her head. Hotch watched the curve of her neck as she moved and the way she licked her lips catching a fallen drop of liquor. She laid the glass down on the desk, allowing her hand to brush over his. His skin crackled with electricity.

She moved with grace as she climbed down from his desk. That one moment shared more intimate than she’d expected it to feel, with their proximity, the lateness of the hour and the unusually undone Aaron sitting at his desk.

His eyes followed her every movement, skin stinging as if he’d been burned. She was halfway to the door before he heard himself call out to her. It almost didn’t sound like his own voice.

‘Wait. Don’t go yet. Come here.’ His voice was firm like it always was, but there was a depth to it that she hadn’t heard before. One she’d always longed for. His eyes glinted with dark hues as he watched her turn from the door. He almost breathed out in relief.

She had an unreadable expression. One that set the blood in his veins on fire. She lowered her head, and with it, her eyes darkened. He stood from his desk, making his way over to her with steps that felt dreamlike. Their eyes met with an energy never shared before and once in front of her he reached out, gently tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear so that he had an unobscured view of her whole face. The same face that had the power to completely undo him.

Her eyes widened slightly as if surprised by his gentle touch, but at the same time, there was a knowing in them as if she’d been waiting for it all along. She remained still, and his heart pounded in his chest as he looked into his eyes, an unspoken conversation passing between them. It felt like any words would have made the moment less intimate.

His hand lingered against her cheek, the warmth radiating from his touch was a stark contrast to the cold, sterile environment of his office. Her skin felt like it was burning under him. The silence between them was palpable, filled with the yet unspoken words and emotions that threatened to bubble to the surface. Hotch, usually so controlled in his feelings suddenly felt so unsteady. His heart beat suspiciously with the feeling that perhaps he’d crossed a line.

‘How do you know?’ He whispered, eyes scanning hers as if he were a detective trying to uncover the evidence that gave her certainty. In the light of the office, she looked like she’d been hand carved, art that he’d been lucky enough to be in the presence of. He traced his thumb over her lips, eyes heavy with a mixture of desire and something else she couldn't quite place. It was a dangerous gesture, one that could endanger his whole career.

'I trust you, and that’s all I need to know that we’ll get him.' she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper, eyes glazed with a devotion that almost made him groan. The conviction of her words pierced his wavering confidence. He’d gone from feeling almost hopeless to buzzing with determination.

He let his hand fall away from her face, but the warmth lingered, an almost promise that what she’d been sure she’d felt moments ago had indeed been real. Reality swarmed his brain, aware of the situation he’d almost found himself in. He straightened up, posture contrasting his relatively dishevelled exterior.

"You’re right, you should follow my orders. Go home, get some rest. I told the team we’d start fresh in the morning," he instructed, a softness in his voice that was rarely displayed. But she didn’t move, and he didn’t either.

He watched her eyes for any sign of discomfort, the tension in the room was palpable, an electrifying current that Hotch didn’t dare to break. Silence blanketed them, only broken by the ticking of his watch. It was a solitary reminder of the passing time, yet the urgency of their case had fallen to the back of his mind.

‘Close the door.’ She instructed, using the same authority that Hotch usually spoke with. The change in dynamic almost made him falter, but with a small smirk, he moved towards the door. He’d been aware of the power imbalance he held in his position but with the tone of her voice, there was a subtle shift in the air between them. She moved back towards his desk with certainty. Moving his name tag so she could perch to face the dark space of the office.

Their eyes met across the room. She tilted her head to the side, examining his body language. As he locked the door behind him, the air seemed to constrict around them, the room becoming a world of its own where only they existed. The only sound in the room was the soft click of the lock and their breathing. It echoed throughout the office, bouncing off the walls and settling into their bones. The tension escalated, but it was different now, charged with an anticipation that neither of them could ignore.

He might have been unit chief, but right here, right now, she was in charge. The line between professional and personal blurred dangerously as their eyes locked, a promise of something more hanging in the balance. The air was charged now, they were poised, daring each other to make the first move. They both knew that they were on the precipice of something dangerous, something that could have dire consequences professionally.

Yet, the pull was too strong to ignore, and for the first time, Hotch allowed himself to teeter on the edge, his resolve tested by the powerful undercurrent of desire that crackled between them. Tonight, they were not just colleagues, they were two individuals drawn together by an irresistible force. In the room, the undeniable chemistry that had been simmering under the surface for far too long had nowhere to hide.

On the desk, she rested each hand palm down to the side of her thighs and opened her legs wider to create space for his body to fit. She moved her head in a motion for him to step forward. Hotch couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, pupils were blown wide from more than just the darkness of the room. How long had he craved something so forbidden, how long had he denied himself the idea that this could ever happen?

As he moved closer to her, he couldn't help but think about the deadly sin of lust, a strong passion or longing that was deemed sinful. Here he was, teetering on the edge of crossing professional boundaries, something he’d never done. The balance of energy in the room was no longer solely from the stress of the case, it was about them - about her. He could have tried to argue that it was, but no jury in the state would believe him. If this were a trial, he was about to be found guilty.

The Unsub's deadly pattern echoed in his mind - the three sins he’d yet to kill for; envy, jealousy over another's life or possessions, wrath, a violent anger driven by hatred, and finally, lust, a powerful desire that can become all-consuming, much like the craving he was experiencing in that very moment. Looking upon her he felt envious of anyone who had ever been allowed to touch her, he felt wrath for anyone who had ever wronged or hurt her, and most of all he felt lust. He definitely felt lust, his desire for her taking over all his senses.

Was he caught between duty and desire? No, he had no doubt in his mind. The sheer intensity of her shared gaze and the way she was beckoning him forward smashed the boundaries of their relationship. He’d never seen her in this light, never dared to allow himself to think of her like this. But now she was in front of him how could he ever deny himself something so sweet?

Hotch had always been a man of control, a man who kept his emotions in check. But in this room, with the charged atmosphere heavy between them, he felt his resolve wavering. He was caught in the powerful current of the desire for her that he’d managed to keep at bay. He didn’t want to be in control anymore.

He closed the distance between them, fitting himself between her legs, his hands landing on her hips as he looked down at her, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

She brought one hand off the desk to hold the waistband of his suit trousers, tugging lightly.

“Are you finally going to kiss me, Agent Hotchner?” She asked, voice dripping with honey. Sweetness laced with danger that hit him right in the chest like a bullet.

She was an intoxicating mix of all seven, a deadly sin in her own right. She was his lust, his unending desire. She was his gluttony, the one he wanted to consume endlessly. She was his greed, the one he wanted all for himself. She was his sloth, his reason for inertia. She was his wrath, the one who could ignite a fire in him like no other. She was his envy, the one he admired and coveted. And she was his pride, the one who made him feel like he was on top of the world.

‘You will be the ruin of me.’ He breathed, his eyes almost black. He looked down at her taking in the sight of her flushed cheeks and the way her eyes sparkled with a mixture of mischief and satisfaction. He was entirely wrapped around her finger. Tonight, he decided, he would willingly drown in this sweet sin, consequences be damned.

‘That is entirely my intention.’ She chuckled and he groaned, a guttural sound that felt foreign to him.

"Only if you promise not to tell the team," he murmured, a playful undertone to his voice.

As he leaned down to capture her lips with his, he knew without a doubt that this was a deadly sin he was willing to commit. It was both sweet and intense, a perfect reflection of their now complicated relationship.

Her lips tasted of the whiskey they'd shared, sweet with a hint of burn that left him wanting more. She tasted like a curse, sickeningly sweet as if to cause him decay. He deepened the kiss, pulling her impossibly closer. He was standing on the cliff of the unknown, and he was more than willing to jump and fall headfirst.

As he pulled away, he couldn't help but study her face. He’d come face to face with endless serial killers, and been in the presence of pure evil. But he’d never been so close to something so dangerous. She was a temptation he couldn't resist. Sweeter than any apple in the Garden of Eden. He traced the contours of her face with his fingers, his gaze never leaving hers.

He could still taste her on the back of his tongue, sugar and shared whiskey burning. He’d never been so certain that he’d been willing to trade his control for the intoxicating sweetness that was her. She was a forbidden fruit that was too alluring to resist, and Aaron Hotchner had no more resistance left in him. Not now he’d tasted something so delicious.

After all, wasn't life about balancing the deadly sins and virtues? Tonight, he chose to sin.

(you can now read part two here!)

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #aaron hotchner x you #criminal minds fic #hotch x reader #aaron hotchner fic #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner fanfiction #criminal minds hotch

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