alynicoleee
Be Not Nobody
A girl embarking into the world of fanfiction
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty One
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 21)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - OFC
Pairing: PG-13
For the next few weeks Alyssa woke up with a smile on her face every day. Things with Tim had been going really good. They spoke every day, they saw each other as often as they could, and just as he had promised - he had begun going to therapy. Alyssa was happier for him than she was for herself, she knew his soul needed this and she could tell it was helping too, every time she saw him she could see his green eyes shine a little brighter.
Tim hadn't met any of Alyssa's friends or family and that was by design. Alyssa's circle was small and most of her friend's were actually acquaintances rather than friends. There were few people in her life who she cared to introduce Tim too - because in truth, none of their opinions mattered to her.
Tonight she was going to introduce him to her mother, and then they were off to dinner with her best friend and her boyfriend. She was worried for both events - not because of what either would think, she didn't care - but how Tim would feel. She had tried to brace him for what was coming but he laughed and thought she was being a bit dramatic.
Her doorbell rang at exactly 7:30p, Tim was always very prompt. He had picked her up plenty of times by now but she was usually waiting for him outside to avoid him coming to the door - she knew he wouldn't wait in the car if she asked.
She took a deep breath as she opened the door and led him inside. Her mom was waiting in the living room, the awkward silence that immediately followed already let Alyssa know that her mother did not approve. Tim introduced himself, shook her mom's hands and tried to make small talk. Her mom had a fake smile plastered on her face that only Alyssa could distinguish. It wasn't anything Tim said - frankly it was just her mother's old school latin ways - if they weren't from the same culture as she was, they never met her standards. Tim wasn't hispanic, he had a Filipino and American background, and he didn't speak a word of Spanish - to her mother, those were all negatives. His long hair, which Alyssa loved, was also something her old school mother would frown about.
After about 10 minutes Alyssa interrupted their awkward small talk, explaining they had to leave to meet her best friend. All the way to the car all Alyssa could do was apologize. He opened the door for her and she slid in the passenger seat as she continued to apologize. He got in next to her and interrupted her with a kiss.
"Relax, it really wasn't all that bad." Tim smiled as he backed the car out of the driveway.
Alyssa's phone beeped and she groaned as she saw a text message from her mother - "At least he opened the door for you and was dressed nice."
"The good news is you have manners and she approved of your wardrobe".
Tim laughed, "At least there's something. But come on, it was fine. She didn't say anything and she was smiling."
She couldn't help but break his spirit, "It was a fake smile. Don't hold your breath on her liking you. So I hope it's not important to you."
Tim placed his hand on her thigh as he drove, "Is it important to you?"
She laughed, "If my mom likes you? Of course not. I'm aware she doesn't like anyone - she doesn't even like me half the time."
Tim frowned, "You know that's not true."
Alyssa didn't respond. She didn't want to get into it, not right now and not ever. He'd eventually see what she meant for himself, and that was going to be bad enough.
They arrived to the restaurant first and sat down to wait for Alyssa's best friend Cindy and her boyfriend Eugene. They were seated in a booth and as they waited Alyssa rested her head on Tim's shoulders. He gave her knee a squeeze and told her to relax.
Cindy and Eugene arrived at that moment, apologizing for being late. After introductions were made and everyone had ordered Cindy was the first one to break the ice. She hadn't heard that much about Tim - just the basics, but she knew Alyssa had always been a fan of his.
"So the elusive Tim Lincecum huh. Who would have thought you'd be found on a dating app of places."
Alyssa groaned as Tim laughed.
"Yeah. I never thought about it either until my friends opened the profile for me."
"Nice. Alyssa has been on those apps for years. I couldn't do it, I always thought I was going to be kidnapped or something."
Eugene laughed as Cindy continued, "Honestly though. I was dragged to enough of your games that this is a good surprise."
Tim glanced over at Alyssa who was starting to blush, "I may have never missed one of your starts in Florida."
Cindy decided to continue to poke fun, "Ummm, as a I recall didn't you leave me waiting in your driveway for 20 minutes before the Beyonce concert because you had to finish watching a game on TV."
Alyssa laughed, covering her face with her hands. Tim just smiled as he said, "interesting."
Alyssa quickly changed the subject; but for most of the night the girls monopolized the conversation. Tim jumped in here and there and tried to throw around conversation starters when they let him. Euguene for the most part was quiet, something Alyssa still couldn't get used to. Tim tried to talk to him, but it was mostly one word replies. When the night was over they exchanged their farewells and walked slowly back to Tim's car.
Alyssa didn't feel like going home yet. She wanted to spend some more time with Tim - "Can we go back to your place and just watch a movie or something".
Tim kissed her forehead softly, "Of course we can".
She loved those forehead kisses almost as much as she loved the passionate ones.
Once they were settled in Tim's place, on the couch with the TV on, Alyssa had to ask what Tim thought of the night.
"I had fun. Although I'm kind of surprised actually."
Alyssa frowned slightly as she looked at Tim, "Why?"
Tim grinned, "I wasn't aware you were such a baseball groupie".
Alyssa frowned as she tried to hide behind a couch pillow, "I can't believe she said all that". She could feel her face heating up.
Tim scooted closer to Alyssa and began to tickle her, "Kind of adorable really."
Alyssa was giggling due to Tim's tickles and when he stopped she scooted into his arms. It was so cozy and she felt so incredibly safe wrapped up in his arms. It was crazy the amount of trust she had in Tim in such a short time.
Alyssa would be lying if she said she paid attention to the movie on the screen - she kept sneaking in kisses and their hands playfully groped each other. But they kept it just as teasing and when the movie was over Tim took Alyssa home.
She closed the door behind her and leaned against the door. Even with all the awkwardness of the night, she had a fantastic time. And she didn't care what Cindy or her mother's opinion of Tim was going to be. She didn't want to hear it - her opinion of him was all that mattered.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 20)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum
Pairing: PG-13
Tim landed back in Miami late Monday and all he wanted to do was see Alyssa. It was late so he thought twice about texting her and decided to wait until morning. He was hoping her work schedule this week would allow some time for them to see each other, sooner rather than later.
He was serious when he told that her that he was all in. His dad was right, good things were allowed to happen to him. It had felt like nothing good had happened to him in years, but this - this felt right. He could tell from Alyssa's text on Thanksgiving night that she was a little skeptical. He didn't blame her - they had started good and then he had slammed on the breaks without warning. Now he wanted to speed things up again.
The next morning Tim texted Alyssa early and was slightly worried when hours had passed and she hadn't responded. She was usually a pretty fast texter.
Her response came slightly before noon and Tim couldn't help but laugh, "Good Morning - yes, it's morning. Don't judge me."
"Did you really just wake up?"
"Yes I did. And even though it's almost noon - I am pouring some coffee and about to eat breakfast."
"So if breakfast is now - does that mean I'm inviting you to lunch or dinner?"
"Well that depends - if it's lunch, I definitely won't make it but if it's dinner I definitely will."
"Dinner it is then. Any preference?"
"Some place that has Tequila. I've had a long few days that I will gladly tell you about over alcohol."
Tim smiled, "Pick a place and send me the details. Wherever your favorite cocktail is made."
"Sounds like a plan."
Tim noted down the address and began to clean around the apartment - there wasn't much to clean. Like most places Tim had lived in - the place was mostly bare. He had a hard time ever getting around to decorating past the necessities. You would think he had just moved in when in reality he had been there for five months - since July. He had signed a one year lease and didn't know if he would stick around. The plan had been to disconnect from what he had known for a year. But he was hopeful that plan would change and he would stick around longer.
He arrived to the restaurant Alyssa had chosen right as her car was pulling into the parking lot. He was more than happy to see her, and when they met up at the entrance he couldn't help but wrap her in a hug. She felt so right in his arms.
They walked in and after Alyssa had ordered her much needed cocktail - before even opening the menu - they began to catch each other up on the holiday weekend.
By the time the night came to an end they were all smiles. Alyssa was laughing, seemingly having forgotten the rough weekend she had at work. Alyssa was going to be taking a few days off work in the coming weeks and he was hoping to get more time with her during that time.
He really wanted to make this work. They had talked about his sudden urge to make everything work but he couldn't explain how in the short time that he had known her, she lit a spark in him. A spark that had been dim for some time.
But he could sense her apprehension with everything - he knew he was broken; he always had. Alyssa disagreed that he was broken but made no secret of hiding the fact that she understood he had trauma and pain in his life, and that he needed to sort everything out. Tim understood and while he had gotten help before he hadn't gotten any lately. So he let her know that he was going to search for a therapist in Miami, promising to find someone to help him work things out. He wasn't ashamed of going to therapy, he had been going for longer than he was willing to admit. But recently he hadn't found a reason to continue to go - except for now, for her.
Alyssa lifted her hand up to his face and stroked his cheek softly as she spoke, "I don't want you to feel like you can't count on me too, because you can, but I want to make sure that you're okay first - even if that means it's not with me. But if I can help you heal, I want to do that too."
Tim smiled and placed his hand over hers before moving in and giving her a soft kiss, "You have no idea how much all of this means to me". For a while they just sat there, foreheads touching, gazing into each others eyes and smiling. It was simple and sweet, and exactly what he needed.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Nineteen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 19)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - OFC
Rating: PG-13
Alyssa spent Thanksgiving morning decorating her Christmas tree and then headed to her boss's house to spend Thanksgiving with coworkers who had become friends. The majority of people in Alyssa's life were people she met at work. It was the only good thing about working in retail - there was so much turnover that she was constantly making new friends. Unfortunately the friendships seldom lasted once people moved on from the job.
Alyssa arrived first - much like she always did. As the night progressed she was pleased to find that almost all of the attendees were single women. She had been worried that she would have to spend the holiday surrounded by couples and being reminded yet again that she was alone.
Tim had slowed things down on what was a fast and hot start to something that maybe shouldn't have taken off as fast as it did. I mean - did people really find their life long partners online? Alyssa couldn't help but hope so. She kept her phone in her purse all night, she wasn't expecting to hear from Tim again until the next day. They kept their communication simple and it was mostly a slew of messages in the middle of the day.
Alyssa ate, drank and mingled but soon it was time to leave as she had work the next morning. She arrived home, kicked off her shoes and pulled out her phone to set her alarm for the next day and was surprised to find a text from Tim waiting for her.
"I think spending time with my dad was much needed. I'm in. I'm all in. Date night when I get back?"
Alyssa smiled as she collapsed in bed. She had to admit that she was a bit dissapointed when Tim slowed things down and took it back to a friendship. But now she was wondering if he was jumping in too fast again. The man had trauma, issues he was dealing with, and maybe those should have been red flags to her but she didn't care. She wanted to jump in with him. She wanted to help him heal, help him move on and she wanted to be the one to make him happy because he sure as hell made her happy when they were together.
"I would love that. But I hope you'll tell me what's changed your mind."
"I talked to my dad, about everything. There is no one that knows me better in this world. And he just said some things to me that made sense. So I decided I'm ready. I'm ready to open myself up again, to let someone else in, and share love again."
Alyssa read the message multiple times, the last few words sticking with her - share love. She really wanted to share love with someone, she wanted that feeling more than she wanted anything else in the world.
"That sounds amazing Tim. See you when you get back."
It was going to be a long weekend waiting for him to get back.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Eighteen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 18)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG-13
Tim walked around his dad's house and noticed that his dad had set up a few Christmas knick knacks around the place. His dad had never been one for decorating - their holidays had mostly been meek and quiet, just the two of them for many years.
Tim had wished Alyssa a happy thanksgiving and she had responded back, stating that she hoped he had a nice time with his family. He sat in the kitchen island drinking coffee when his dad walked him.
"Good Morning Tim".
"Good Morning Dad. I like the Christmas details starting to pop up."
"Thanks. I thought I'd add something to cheer up the place a little."
Tim nodded and stared into his cup.
"You okay son?"
Tim looked up and sighed. He hadn't talked about Alyssa to anyone, but kind of wanted to.
"When did you know you were ready to move on? After Mom left?"
Tim and his father's situation wasn't the same. His wife had passed away after they had been together for ten years. While his mom had left his father one day after they had been together for over fifteen years. They had both lost their partner but in significantly different ways. He knew it wasn't the same - but maybe his dad would be able to offer some sort of perspective.
Tim's father, Chris, sighed. "I don't know if there was ever a point where I said - I'm ready. Now is the time. For a few years there I lived vicariously through you, through your career, so I didn't really have time to even think about a relationship. I want to say that it was once I stopped missing your mother, once the empty feeling went away. I think that's when I knew I was ready."
Chris paused waiting for a response from Tim. When he didn't get one he continued, "Are you thinking that time is moving too slow? Or maybe too fast? There's no definitive time table here. No one can tell you if it's too soon or not soon enough. Only you'll know when the time is right. If it feels right."
Tim had been listening to his dad and looked back down into his cup. "I met someone. And I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I'm ready to go and start something but then other times I feel guilty, like I'm moving on too fast."
Chris sat down next Tim and placed a hand on his shoulder, "It's okay to feel guilty. But Cristin wouldn't want you to dwell and be alone forever. She'd want you to be happy and find love again."
"I know. And I tell myself that Cristin would be okay with my moving on, but then I'll go a few days where I don't even think of her, and that's when I begin to feel guilty. And I know that's not fair. To me, to her memory, or even to the woman I met."
"You want to tell me about her? Or is that prying into something that you don't even know where it stands right now."
"You know it's never prying Dad. And I always value your input. You know Drew and Sean were down in Miami in late October. Drew being Drew decided he'd download one of those dating apps on my phone and set me up with a profile. I didn't think I was even going to use it but I did. For the most part the app was pretty mundane, matches didn't really go anywhere - but than I matched with this one woman - Alyssa. I think what made it different with her was that she seemed so relaxed and nonchalant right from the beginning. And she knew exactly who I was - but never made a big deal out of. In fact, even now I don't think she's ever mentioned anything about my playing days. She knew who I was but treated me like just another random match. I liked that."
Tim moved to put his cup in the sink as he continued talking, "We went out twice and the connection was incredible. It felt like I had known her my whole life and then I got scared that everything was feeling right and maybe moving too fast. So I kind of back tracked and we started over, going slower. But sometimes I feel like it's a snail pace, but I don't want it to feel rushed either. But she's amazing. She's giving me space and time to figure everything out, but I don't know if that's even fair to her and I don't want to hurt her either.
Tim sighed as he leaned against the countertop and waited for his dad to tell him something he didn't want to hear, but instead Chris just sat and responded, "Son, good things are allowed to happen to you too. And they don't need to be difficult, or hard or come with sacrifices. They can just be."
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Seventeen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 17)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG-13
Tim arrived home feeling relieved and thankful. She was still in. Still willing to give whatever this was a chance to evolve. Tim knew he didn't deserve it - he should have never ghosted her. Especially not after the two great dates they had.
The talk at Starbucks really helped get everything into perspective. He learned a lot about Alyssa and he was able to explain a lot about himself as well. He was still scared - but he was more scared of hurting her. Even though they were in their late 30s he had lived more life than she had and he didn't want his outlook on things to taint her happy and sunny disposition.
They seemed to be on the same page though - they were going to take things slow and not rush it. Become friends, then lovers, and then who knows what the future held. Marriage and kids wasn't a priority for either of them - happiness was.
Tim took out his phone as he sat on his couch and typed out, "Hi".
She responded back after a few minutes, "Hi. :)".
It was exactly the same way they had started their conversation when they matched on the dating app. Tim smiled as he typed out, "I hope you have a great rest of your day."
For the next two weeks Tim continued contact with Alyssa. They texted daily but not for a marathon of hours. They had met up once more since their Starbucks date but Tim had kept it friendly. He wanted to take things slow - keep those feelings of him doing something wrong away - and maybe kissing her on the second date was too soon. He still wasn't sure about anything, many times he just felt new to everything, with a boggled mind. Maybe grief did that, he wasn't sure.
Tim went to Seattle for Thanksgiving but he made sure to give Alyssa a heads up before he left. She would be spending the day with friends - explaining that her family wasn't really one for family gatherings. They weren't that close; even if they all lived in the same city. Tim knew that feeling, other than his dad he wasn't that close to his family either, even him and Sean had grown apart in the last few years he was alive. This year he would be sharing Thanksgiving with his dad, aunt, uncle and cousins. He had spent the last holiday with them as well but it had felt odd, everyone tip toeing around him to avoid saying anything. He hoped this year it would be a little less awkward. He wasn't really in the mood to spend time with extended family, hadn't been in a while, but his dad wanted him there so he reluctantly agreed.
When he got off the plane, his dad was waiting for him.
They exchanged greetings and hugs; the car ride to his dad's silent but comfortable. Somehow the two always understood each other, and for a second Tim thought that maybe the holiday wouldn't be so bad.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Sixteen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 16)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: 3rd Person - OFC
Rating: PG-13
Alyssa didn't know why she responded. She should have left the text go unanswered like he had, but she couldn't, so she responded.
"Hi".
She didn't know what else to say. She wanted to say a lot - wanted to know what happened. But she also didn't want to attack him right away. That would have been rude.
"Can we meet up to talk? Grab a coffee if you're not busy?"
Alyssa thought about it for only a few minutes. Whatever he wanted to say he wanted to do in person. That could be a good thing, but it also gave her a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. She agreed to meet him at a Starbucks location that was the halfway point between them in an hour.
When she arrived Tim was already there - her coffee order in his hands.
"Thanks", she replied.
He motioned towards a corner table and they sat in silence for a few minutes before Tim finally spoke.
"I'm sorry. I owe you an explanation."
Alyssa shook her head, "You don't owe me anything".
"Okay, you deserve an explanation. You deserve an apology. You didn't deserve me ghosting you."
Alyssa looked up at him and tried to hide the sadness in her eyes, but it was apparent he could see it. His green eyes were dark, a sense of melancholy displayed in them.
"I panicked. It's what I do. Things were going good. And everything seemed so easy with you that I convinced myself it couldn't be true. Good things weren't supposed to come so easily. At least they never have before. I got scared. I'm telling myself that I'm ready to move on and continue with my life - but I'm terrified to get hurt. I don't know how much more pain I can take."
Alyssa sat there holding her breath as he spoke. But the more he spoke the more she slowly let out the breath she was holding and began to breathe again.
"I don't know what to say Tim. We kinda just jumped in. We talked, but not about anything deep - I guess not about the important stuff in our lives. Maybe we should do that before we figure out where we stand."
Tim agreed and for the next two hours they sat in their little corner table and talked. They talked about the past - Alyssa had been hurt countless times and Tim had lost love. They talked about their experiences - neither had a plethora of history, but while Alyssa was mostly inexperienced - Tim had been tied with serious relationships for most of his adult life. They talked about their ideologies around love - Alyssa still believed in fairy tales and happily ever afters and Tim had doubts if anything lasted forever. They talked about what they were looking for - Tim wasn't sure what he was looking for but he knew he wasn't looking to have kids, he mentioned it slowly as if it was almost a deal breaker. Alyssa was looking to feel and give love, to be happy with someone and she wasn't sure if kids were part of her future, it could go either way. They talked about their love language - Alyssa craved connection with someone and Tim realized that he did too.
They agreed they would continue to talk, see each other, and see what transpired.
Alyssa made it home that evening feeling as if a weight had been lifted off her shoulder. Somehow she felt freer than she had in a long time. A lot of things she said aloud today had been weighing her down, even if she hadn't realized it.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Fifteen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 15)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - OFC
Rating: PG
Alyssa had pulled her phone out of her pocket about a zillion times during her work day. She had texted Tim before she went to work but hadn't heard back from him. She had thought the date yesterday had gone pretty well. She could still feel that good night kiss in her bones, it was a feeling that she didn't want to lose.
By the time her shift was over she still hadn't heard from Tim. Now she was disappointed, but for some reason not surprised. It was exactly how her life always played out. She never knew what it was - but somehow she always seemed to draw everyone away from her. Then she would spend time fixated on it, and was probably missing other opportunities during that time. She was afraid to divulge to anyone that in her entire adult life she had yet to have a serious romantic relationship. She had flings sure, but nothing that held value over time. Time was just passing right by her - and many times she was too distracted and wrapped up in her own thoughts to even notice.
By the end of the day her phone was still silent. She sighed as she climbed into bed. It had been two great days, but she now found herself drifting off to sleep as a tear silently fell from the corner of her eye.
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Two weeks had gone by and it was almost as if that week had never occurred. Alyssa had gone on with her days as if nothing had happened. It almost felt like she had dreamed everything. Her text to Tim had gone unanswered, so she didn't bother to send another one. She had opened the dating app again only to find that her conversation with Tim was gone - either he had deleted the app, or he had unmatched her. Either way it seemed like any evidence that there was ever a connection was gone.
Alyssa kept on with her days like she had before she met him. But her nights were full replaying the short week of their interactions. She replayed them in her mind on a loop, trying to see if there was something she said or something that happened that would give any indication to the sudden disappearance. The more she thought about it, the sadder she got. She couldn't even explain to herself why. It was only one week - it shouldn't mean that much to her. But she had felt more seen in that one week than she had in a long time, and it was hard to move on from that.
And then her phone beeped, "Hi".
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Fourteen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 14)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: 3rd Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG-13
Tim sat the duck in the passenger seat of his car and smiled. Tonight had been better than yesterday. The first kiss had been sweet, the second had been great, and the third - well; he was hoping to have plenty more like that. He didn't think he was going to work up the nerve to kiss her tonight, but the energy was there. They were vibing so well together that it didn't feel like they were in their late 30s and trying to navigate their life - it felt like they were in their early 20s without a care in the world. It was exactly what he needed.
He got home, placed the duck on his bed and took a picture for Alyssa.
Her response came in right away, "Hahaha! Thank you for being such a good sport. The duckie does look great there."
Tim glanced back at the duck and decided that he was going to keep him right there. It reminded him of the great night they had just had. He didn't have to try to be someone he wasn't with Alyssa. For the last two days he had been himself - unapologetically goofy and carefree and she seemed to really enjoy that.
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Tim woke up the next morning with his head on the duck. It instantly bought a smile to his face. The need to see Alyssa again was beginning to scare him. He wasn't that person - he was used to living life on his own and fitting in love and relationships when he had time. He never let them consume him or take up all his time. In hindsight, that was his biggest regret with Cristin. By the time he was all in - ready to stop splitting time between two different locations - time began to run out on him. It was as if life was trying to teach him a cruel lesson.
He shook his head in an attempt to clear his thoughts. He needed a day on the golf course - away from everything and everyone. Maybe that would settle his thoughts, clear his mind and maybe bring him back down from this fantasy he seemed to be living.
Tim completed his game and pulled out his phone. He stared at the message from Alyssa but thought twice before responding. He was starting to rethink everything. It wasn't supposed to be this easy - his life was never that easy.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Thirteen
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 13)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - OFC
Rating: PG-13
She had enjoyed every minute of that kiss. Her insides lit up when he had grabbed her by the waist and she instinctively placed her arms around his neck. She wanted that kiss and when he leaned it for it, it was magical, but when he pulled back and apologized she worried that maybe he was having second thoughts. But that worry disappeared when she kissed him and he didn't pull away, instead leaning more into it.
When they finally pulled away from each Alyssa looked up into Tim's eyes as she spoke, "Maybe you should have."
Tim gave her another quick peck and pulled her over to the next game to continue their night. Alyssa was all smiles. If yesterday had been a great first date, today was the icing on the cake. This was exactly what her soul needed. She hadn't felt this alive, this seen, in awhile.
She hated when the announcement came on that they would be closing soon. Tim suddenly grabbed her hand and pulled her in for a hug causing Alyssa to giggle. At only 5'1 she had to look up to Tim, but she didn't mind it one bit. "So before we go, I think we need to redeem all these tickets and get you a plushie."
Tim laughed, "Me? Shouldn't we get you a plushie."
Alyssa shook her head smiling, "Nope. I have tons, but I could bet that you don't have a single one on that bed of yours." They spent the next ten minutes walking around the small redemption area before Alyssa finally picked up a medium sized yellow ducky. She had wanted something cute and soft. She knew he didn't really want a stuffed animal, but he was being a good sport either way.
"That one?" He laughed, as she picked it up from the pile and held it up to him.
"Yep. Nice a bright. I think it's adorable."
She smiled brightly as she watched Tim grab the duck and take it up to the redemption counter as he said, "I guess a duck it is".
They walked out hand in hand, with Tim's free hand holding the duck.
Alyssa guided him out to her car, she hadn't parked far. She leaned against the car door, not wanting to leave just yet. Tim seemed to catch on and placed his forehead against hers. She closed her eyes, wanting to capture this feeling as much as she could. When she opened them, Tim's green eyes were sparkling as his entire face brigtenined in a smile.
"Another great night," he whispered, as he leaned in to kiss her good night.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twelve
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 12)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: 3rd Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG-13
Tim woke up excited for the day. He glanced at his nightstand clock, only 8am, and decided to send Alyssa a "Good Morning" text. He hoped that would convey that he was ready for their next date tonight.
He wasn't entirely sure what the plan was. He had googled the address she gave him but it pointed to an outlet mall. There was no way her plan involved shopping - she seemed like the least materialistic person he had ever met.
By mid afternoon he decided to ask what the plan was, but she wouldn't budge. She simply said to meet her in front of the Cheesecake Factory - but that it wasn't where they were going.
He arrived before 8pm and found her already standing in front of the restaurant. She was all smiles when she saw him and it was contagious.
"Ready?", she asked.
Tim smiled, "You're going to tell me now right?"
Alyssa shrugged, took his hand and led the way. It was nice to hold hands with someone again. Her hands were soft and fit perfectly in his. She led him towards the escalator and up they went. She continued pulling him along until she stopped - right in front of Dave & Busters - an arcade / sports bar.
Tim looked up at the sign and back at her smiling face, "Really?"
She nodded and he couldn't help but notice the childlike excitement that she exuded.
For the next few hours they played countless arcade games, stopping only to grab some food and drinks at the bar and to refill their tokens. Tim was laughing along with Alyssa the entire night, enjoying the night as much as she was.
After one of Alyssa's many wins against him, he couldn't help but wrap his arms around her waist and twirl her. She turned around to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck, the smile never leaving her face as they locked eyes.
Tim couldn't help it. He leaned in and kissed her but suddenly pulled back and apologized, "I'm sorry. Maybe I shouldn't -".
Alyssa didn't let him finish, she hadn't removed her arms from around his neck and she leaned in to return the kiss. This time Tim didn't pull away, he leaned into it and didn't want it to end.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Eleven
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 11)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - OFC
Rating: PG
Alyssa arrived home and collapsed on the couch with the biggest smile on her face. She had the best time with Tim tonight and was hoping it wasn't a one and done. Just as her mind began to wander she got a text from Tim informing her that he had arrived home.
"Me Too", she replied.
His next message came in before she could think of anything to reply.
"I really had a great time tonight. Wondering when I can see you again?"
Alyssa responded almost instantly, "I'm free tomorrow. But only if you let me pick out our next destination."
She didn't care if she sounded too eager or too desperate, she wanted to see him again. This had been her ideal first date and she wasn't ready to let go of the fantasy of falling in love - even if it was with someone who had seemed like the most unlikely person to ever fall for. For the past 4 hours Tim had shown her that he was just like her - at least now it was. So maybe he threw a baseball around in a past life - but in this life, he could definitely pass for the sweet boy next door.
Alyssa was ecstatic when Tim's message of agreement came in. She knew exactly where she wanted to take Tim tomorrow. It was one of her favorite places to unwind and she didn't frequent it as much as she would have liked - simply because she didn't have many friends to frequent it with.
She smiled as she sent Tim the address and the meetup time. Tomorrow couldn't come fast enough.
- - - - - - - -
The next morning Alyssa woke up to a "Good Morning" text from Tim. She smiled as she reread the sweet gesture. She knew it was a small thing - but those small things always meant the world to her, mostly because she seldom'd experienced them.
She replied back, "Good Morning, can't wait for tonight."
She usually had a hard time getting out of bed in the mornings - after all, her dreams were usually better than her reality - but today she couldn't get out of bed fast enough. It seemed like the day went by at a snail's pace. She was ready for it to be night time and to see Tim again - his whole face seemed to light up when he genuinely smiled and she loved it. She had seen his smile change through the night yesterday, and by the end of the night she could feel him smiling, and that honestly lit up her entire being.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Ten
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 10)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: 3rd Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG
Before Tim knew it, several hours had passed and it was time to end the night. He couldn't deny that he had a great time with Alyssa. He had been a bit nervous that she wouldn't like the food truck idea, but she loved it.
He walked her to her car, taking their time with each step. He didn't know how to end the night. He wanted to kiss her but wasn't sure if it was right, if it was too soon. He opened her car door and smiled, "I had a good time tonight."
She looked back at him with a grin on her face, "I can honestly say that this was my best dating app date ever." She gave him a peck on the cheek before getting in her car and telling him to drive safe and text her when he got home.
Tim couldn't help but walk to his car with a goofy grin on his face. It really had been a great night - one of the best he had in a while. It never felt awkward or weird. It felt like they clicked right away and had known each other for years.
He sat in his car for awhile, debating weather to share the good feelings with his friends and decided against it. He wanted to keep this for himself - at least for a short while. He drove to what was now his home in silence, letting the memories from the night replay in his head. He didn't know what had suddenly consumed him, but it felt right.
He got inside and pulled out his phone to text Alyssa that he had arrived home safe. She replied that she had too so he decided to ask her out again.
"I really had a great time tonight. Wondering when I can see you again?"
Alyssa's response came in almost instantly, "I'm free tomorrow. But only if you let me pick out our next destination."
Tim smiled, "Sounds like a date."
"Good. Because I wanted to see you again too."
Tim collapsed on his bed smiling up at the ceiling.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Nine
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 9)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - OFC
Rating: PG
By the time Tuesday arrived Alyssa was full of butterflies. They had spent the previous four days sending each other messages all day long. She couldn't deny that she was very giddy. They had finally exchanged numbers and moved the conversation out of the app. They hadn't spoken by phone or video, only by text, and Alyssa wondered a bit if maybe they should have. It all seemed genuine but she still had the tiny feeling in the back of her mind that this could be a catfish.
They had agreed to meet at the food truck at 8pm. Alyssa arrived right on time and pulled out her phone to see that Tim had texted her a few minutes earlier that he had arrived and was sitting at a table to the right of the truck.
Alyssa took a deep breath, stepped out of her car, and walked towards the truck. As she approached the truck she spotted him easily - his signature locks gave him away. She smiled wide as she walked towards him. He sensed her approaching, stood up and smiled back at her.
"Hi".
"Hi."
Alyssa laughed at the awkward hellos and Tim laughed alongside her.
He shrugged sheepishly before speaking, "Sorry. I've never done this before."
Alyssa smiled, "That's actually a good thing you know. I've only done a handful of these. And they're always a bit awkward."
Tim smiled and motioned towards the truck, "Ready to order?"
Alyssa nodded and they ordered their food and sat down to eat. Alyssa couldn't help but to keep staring at Tim in between bites. Her attention was fully on him and his was on her. They barely glanced around at anything other than each other as their meal progressed. The conversation flowed as effortlessly in person as it had behind a screen.
She was usually quiet and reserved, but tonight was different. She felt comfortable, as if she had known him for years and he was an old friend she was catching up with. If Tim felt awkward he never let her know it.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Eight
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 8)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: 3rd Person - OFC
Rating: PG
Alyssa woke up early and was relieved to find a response from Tim. It had been hours since she had dumped that last message on him. The timestamp confirmed he had sent the message in the middle of the night, only a few hours prior.
She opened it and couldn't believe it - he wanted to meet. She pinched herself, rubbed her eyes and looked again. It was still there, she wasn't dreaming it. Unfortunately she was working this weekend. Life in retail didn't exactly help her in her personal life - but she was making a career out of it - even if it was a career that others looked down on her for.
She sighed - it seemed that the more messages she typed out to Tim, the more reasons she gave him that this was a bad idea.
"I'm actually working this weekend - I work in retail so weekends are usually busy. I know, not very glamorous but it helps to pay the bills. I'm free Tuesday and Wednesday though. We could meet up then if it works for you?"
By mid afternoon she had her answer, "Either day works. My calendar is pretty wide open every day of the week. If you don't mind though, there's this one place I've been interested in trying - I've driven by it a few times and it's caught my attention."
For some reason the idea of Tim driving in maniac Miami made her smile. "Sure. Tuesday works for me. Where did you have in mind?"
Tim shared all the info and it turned out that he wasn't staying all that far from her. She had assumed that he was staying in the Downtown area or in the Beach like most tourists did - but he wasn't. She googled his suggestion and laughed - it was a food truck. She was more than happy to agree to that. Lowkey atmosphere's were her favorite places. Fancy restaurants always meant she had to dress up - and she was usually uncomfortable in her surroundings. But this - this was her idea of a perfect date.
For the first time in a long time, she was excited. Tuesday couldn't come fast enough.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Seven
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 7)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG
Tim opend his messages and was a bit surprised by how brazenly honest Alyssa was being. He felt a tinge of sadness for her, but realized that he felt like that himself a lot of times.
He was a loner through and through. He had always been comfortable around his teammates, in an environment he always thrived in. But outside that environment, he most often wanted to be invisible. He felt more like an outcast outside of his comfort zone. But that comfort zone didn't exist anymore, it hadn't in a long time. So he understood what Alyssa meant about not being someone people kept around. He couldn't blame people on his end- he didn't make it easy for them. He assumed Alyssa was the same, being as she liked being home.
"I get it. I feel like that a lot. More so lately. It's just hard to leave the house and get out there. Online dating almost seemed like the safe bet. At least the rejection was mostly done virtually. Sucks either way though. You deserve to be someone's first choice - everyone does."
Tim couldn't think of anything else to say. He just knew that as crazy as it sounded, he was starting to feel a connection - even if it was behind a screen. So he decided he needed to get rid of the screen.
"Are you busy this weekend? Maybe we could meet up for dinner or something?"
Tim took a deep breath. It took hours before he could bring himself to send the message. Was he really ready to put himself out there again? Alyssa would be the first woman he met after everything. And what if he put himself out there again and it blew up in his face instead. He wasn't the person she once saw on a TV screen anymore. He couldn't even remember what it was like to be that person anymore. He was still trying to figure out how to be this new person, and most of the time nothing made sense. But he knew at one point he would have to move on. He couldn't ignore how right things felt right now - so he didn't. He hit send before he could talk himself out of it.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Six
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 6)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: 3rd Person - OFC
Rating: PG
Alyssa opened her latest message from Tim and smiled wide. It sounded like he was open to anything. That was surprising in itself because she figured the fact that she knew who he was, and used to be a fan, might scare him away. But those moments once watching him on TV seemed like a lifetime ago now. She knew he wasn't the same person anymore - hell she wasn't even the same person anymore.
She hesitated only slightly before typing out, "I'm open to anything as long as you are. After all - doesn't seem like anything I've been doing is working if I'm on a dating app."
She pressed send and put her phone down for a second to think. She never thought she'd get anywhere with online dating apps, and the past few people she met hadn't worked out for more than the initial first date, so she knew not to get her hopes us. However she really couldn't help herself. Tim had always seemed like someone she would click with - he was a homebody, just like her. She had always had trouble with that. No one ever seemed to understand why she would rather spend her Saturday night in PJs binge watching a TV series, or gushing on Hallmark Christmas movies, instead of going out and enjoying the atmosphere of Miami.
But it never seemed to be her atmosphere. The people didn't seem to be her people. And truth be told - if she had just a little more courage, a little more ambition, a lil more something she couldn't put her finger on - she would have left a long time ago.
Her phone beeped and she turned it over to see a respond, "And why is that anyway? What brings you to a dating app?"
Alyssa sighed as she typed out a no holds response - "Desperation maybe. Tired of being alone. I'm not the girl people seem to keep around. I'm no one's first choice. I'm not the one out and about every day. I'm the girl that's quietly sitting at home, reading, thinking, wishing she was someone else."
Alyssa didn't know why she typed that or why she pressed send. She didn't talk to anyone about that. Didn't mention it to the handful of friends she had. And saying it out loud to someone - even if it was behind a screen - bought tears to her eyes. She blinked hard as a tear streamed down her face. She had probably just scared him away, but she didn't regret the message. It almost felt liberating to say it. Even if it was to someone who didn't know her, and wouldn't understand it.
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Beginning of Forever: Chapter Five
Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 5)
Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC
POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum
Rating: PG
Tim had been waiting all day for a response from Alyssa. Truth be told he was a little nervous at what her response was going to be, if she responded at all. The last few years of his life had been a mess and he couldn't blame anyone if they didn't want to deal with the broken pieces that still remained.
His friends were headed back to Seattle and San Francisco today. They made sure to remind him they would be back for the Holidays, this time with their families in tow. Tim wasn't looking forward to it. It's not that he didn't enjoy their company, and he knew they meant well, but spending the holidays being reminded of what he didn't have right now was not at the top of his wishlist.
Drew had the last outbound flight of the day and he made sure to continue to pressure Tim to get out of the house while he was in Miami. If he was just going to mope around indoors he could have done that in weary Seattle where the weather would match his mood. Drew wanted Tim to get out, distract himself, make friends and begin to date again. Tim promised he would attempt it. He would at least get outdoors to golf more frequently.
By early evening he finally received a response from Alyssa that caused him to laugh. While it would have been hilarious if his life was an episode of Punk'd, it wasn't. And he really wanted to know if him, being him, was a bad thing in her eyes.
He took a deep breath as he read her response, "Not a bad thing at all. Unless it bothers you that I was once a fan."
The question now was if it bothered him. He had to admit that he did enjoy his anonymity at times. It was hard when everyone recognized you and wanted a picture or an autograph from you. It wasn't always a nuisance, sometimes he enjoyed meeting fans, but other times he felt like he owed something to them.
Tim hesitated slightly and decided to respond honestly. "I don't quite know if it bothers me or not. I guess if you don't mind seeing where this goes, we can find out. Be friends, maybe more, not quite sure."
He couldn't figure out if he wanted to add anything else so he just pressed send and hoped for the best. Tim had never been one to care so much about love before but after losing Cristin, he was wondering if he was just destined to be alone. And although his friends meant well - they didn't always help the situation.
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