wakewithgiggli

[wakewithgiggli]

imagine being born in the ace attorney universe with a name like Rick R. Mortis and just knowing you are not built to last

#funny

[wakewithgiggli]

thankfully matter cannot be created or destroyed so You don’t even have to worry about it

#funny

[wakewithgiggli]

The fact that homelessness is controversial tells you everything you need to know about conservatives.

#homeless

[wakewithgiggli]

Why do people need subtitles to watch a show in English? I don't get it. What is wrong with the ears of young people?

#subtitles

[wakewithgiggli]

(to the pope) so there’s this married couple and they’re enjoying a moment of conjugal intimacy in a manner that glorifies god by cleaving the husband to his wife so that they become one flesh and reflect the perfect union of christ and his church, without the use of any artificial contraception that contravenes natural law and perverts this holy act by severing it from procreation and thus reducing it to a mere outlet for the base lusts of the flesh, and it so happens that the husband reaches the peak of the mysterious and sacred experience of sexual and spiritual ecstasy before the wife is quite ready on this particular occasion, and in her love for him and for the lord she finds herself desirous of continuing a while longer that she too may experience the bliss that is the earthly reward for a holy and pious marriage, and while he is no longer the young man that he was when he gladly swore the vows to enter into the covenant of marriage with her, would it be right and proper for him to perhaps give her a hand, as it were? or perhaps to use the lips and tongue that the lord bestowed upon him so that she may lift her voice to the heavens in praise? and if he were late for work in this instance and his duty as a husband and provider required his prompt departure, would you say that if she gave herself a hand, perhaps with the assistance of an electromechanical device he thoughtfully purchased for her as a token of his love on the day of saint valentine – one of the new jobs with the suction for additional clitoral stimulation, I’m sure you’ve heard of them – would you say that they need have no doubt that this activity is simply a continuation of their blessed union that the lord smiles upon, and not a wanton act of self-abuse that inevitably leads to dissolution and–

(notices the waxy sheen of the decoy pope just as the first swiss guard grabs me from behind) oh fuck here we go again

#funny

[wakewithgiggli]

[monkey paw curls] Rebel Moon

#star wars

[wakewithgiggli]

I just watched a zombie move, so... BRAINSSSS

Folks am I a freak for this one?

#star wars #brains

[wakewithgiggli]

If you ever feel like your whole purpose in life is to just follow people around and annoy them to death, always remember that a human being is a persistence predator.

So even if you weren't born to do that, you're still hardwired to be really, really good at it.

#funny

[wakewithgiggli]

The Occupied Palestinian Territory is enveloped in a spiral of unstoppable violence, with stories Palestinians and other witnesses relay adding new depths to atrocities the world has witnessed since the beginning of Israel’s assault on Gaza over six months ago, the UN Special Rapporteur on the Occupied Palestinian Territory, Francesca Albanese said today. “The pace and intensity with which this violence has spread to the rest of the occupied territory confirms that no Palestinian is safe under Israel’s unfettered control,” Albanese said, concluding a visit to Egypt and Jordan. The Special Rapporteur said Israel had once again arbitrarily denied her access to the Occupied Palestinian Territory, compelling her to report on the situation of Palestinians under occupation from neighbouring states. Albanese said her visit demonstrated that the situation in Gaza is worse than previously assessed, with serious and multi-layered long-term implications. Most victims she met had endured catastrophic injuries, witnessed family members killed and experienced the effects of Israel’s destruction of Gaza’s health infrastructure, even after 26 January 2024, when the International Court of Justice (ICJ) issued a ruling ordering Israel to prevent genocide in Gaza. Patients that previously arrived in Egypt primarily with explosive and war injury-related symptoms are now joined by patients with chronic diseases and/or malnutrition, especially children, arising from Israel’s intentional humanitarian catastrophe in Gaza. “Photos from a mere eight months ago show a chubby-cheeked 8-year-old Hamid, now rake thin and spending his days in excruciating pain due to pancreatitis developed through the harsh conditions of the siege,” the Special Rapporteur said. “Those who have left Gaza come out fractured and wracked by ‘survivors’ guilt’ and severe trauma,” Albanese said. “Just 50 kilometers away from the Gaza Strip, crucial, life-sustaining aid and goods, including water desalination equipment, first aid kits, oxygen cylinders and portable toilets – paid for by taxpayers across the world – languish in warehouses, barred entry into Gaza on the pretext of use by combatants.” “Humanitarian measures implemented so far – airdrops and maritime corridors – are a mere palliative for what is desperately needed and legally due,” the expert said. “These measures are grossly inadequate to alleviate the humanitarian catastrophe that Israel’s assault has created.” “At this point, Israel has reneged on its international obligations to a degree that warrants a call for sanctions,” Albanese said.

#israel #palestine

[wakewithgiggli]

#maydayfordemocracy #stopproject2025

[wakewithgiggli]

male gender nonconformity is getting out of hand because *checks notes* straight guys sometimes get thier ears pierced now and *checks notes even harder, squints* if a man is too effeminate it makes me really uncomfortable and angry for some reason. this must be due to Capitalism

[wakewithgiggli]

still getting anon hate over my post saying you shouldn't work for a fucking US defense contractor as an engineer btw. didn't know "it's bad to work at the war crimes factory" was a controversial opinion on here

[wakewithgiggli]

[world's most annoying poster, after spending six hours talking about how much they hate a certain group of people, upon being told that's mean] but why do you need my validation? why are you so self-obsessed that you think you get to have any say on my 400 page treatise about why you, specifically, should be catapulted into the sun? the mere fact that you read my description of a person exactly like you being catapulted into the sun and thought I was talking about you is telling. a true sage would know that I'm Just A Little Guy And It's My Birthday and allow my words to simply slide off them, so when you think about it it's really your fault for letting it get to you. the what-about-me effect online is honestly reaching critical levels.

[wakewithgiggli]

#dracula daily #poll

[wakewithgiggli]

According to a recent report published by the Aargauer Zeitung (h/t Golem.de), around three million smart toothbrushes have been infected by hackers and enslaved into botnets.

The most cyberpunk thing on your dash today.

#funny

[wakewithgiggli]

[ID: tweet from @ tonyhawk that reads:

At coffee shop this morning:

Girl behind counter: (not joking) “has anyone told you that you look like Tony Hawk?”

Me: yes, so much that I sometimes write about it.

Her: haha, here’s your coffee

Other girl by exit: (leans toward me as I walk out): “you really do look like him”]

#funny #tony hawk

[wakewithgiggli]

#ukraine