thelandofstoriescrack

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Mother Goose: We need to open this locked door. Alex, give me your credit card.

Alex: Here.

Mother Goose, pocketing it: Thanks. Conner, break down the door.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect tlos #the land of stories #tlos #conner bailey #alex bailey #Mother Goose

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Alex, setting down a card: Ace of spades

Bree, pulling out an Uno card: +4

Conner, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you

Froggy, flipping the fuck out: What are we fucking playing?!?

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect tlos #the land of stories #tlos #alex bailey #conner bailey #tlos red riding hood #bree campbell

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Alex: We all have our demons.  Alex, grabbing Conner: This one’s mine.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #alex bailey #conner bailey #tlos #chris colfer

[thelandofstoriescrack]

King Chance: When surrendering, Goldilocks is to hand the sword over HILT first.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #tlos #tlos goldilocks #The graphic novel basically

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Froggy: I couldn't do this without you, Red.

  Red: Sure you could. Not as stylishly, of course.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #tlos red riding hood #froggy tlos

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Mother Goose: Tangerina, this morning, I called you abhorrent and reprehensible, and I’d like to withdraw that statement- 

Tangerina: Aww, thanks- 

Mother Goose: But I can't. Those are the 2 words that best describe you

#atom #a tale of magic #tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect quotes #tangerina turkin #Mother Goose #OMG

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Mrs. Peters: Why are you late? 

Conner: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness. 

Mrs. Peters: Overslept?

  Conner: Overslept.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #tlos #conner bailey #chris colfer

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Bree: Oh man, you have any shaving cream?

Conner: No, I don't like the way that it tastes.

Bree: Wait… you eat shaving cream?

Conner: No. Why would I eat it if I don't like the taste.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #tlos #conner bailey #bree campbell

[thelandofstoriescrack]

By the way, you guys have any suggestions please feel free to drop them in the ask box!

(specifying if with or without credit pls)

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories

[thelandofstoriescrack]

AHHH your account just spawned outta nowhere and I’m living for it

Thank you!! I’ve had this idea for a while, I feel like this is a perfect fandom for this so it was time to make it happen.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #ask

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Red: Goldilocks and I are getting closer. The other day she even gave me a sandwich

Goldilocks: I mistook her for a trash can.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #tlos #tlos goldilocks #tlos red riding hood

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Red: And if you have any suggestions, please put them in the suggestion box.

Alex: That’s a trash can.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #alex bailey #tlos #tlos red riding hood #that’s basically book 3 #The scene at her council #Yk

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Elrik: *Holding up a pack of pencils* These are kinda cute.

Xanthous: Elrik, that’s gay

Elrik: We’ve been dating for two years—

#incorrect quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #the land of stories #tlos #xanthous hayfield #elrik

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Red: I never said I was gonna get back together with her. But I was thinking, she’s in town, would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave her a call?

Froggy: No. No, Red, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. It would be the fourth worst thing. Number one: a super volcano. Number two: an asteroid hits the Earth. Number three: All the Evel Knievel movies are lost. Number four: Red calls Goldilocks. Number five: Jack gets eaten by a shark.

Jack: I’m Jack, and I approve the order of that list.

#the land of stories #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect quotes #tlos

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Alex: Hey, Conner, where are you going?

Conner: Well, it depends. When I die, probably hell.

Conner: But right now I’m going to McDonald’s.

#the land of stories #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect quotes #conner bailey #alex bailey

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Alex: Are you alright?

Connor: Short answer or long answer?

Alex: Short?

Conner: No.

Alex: Long?

Conner: Nooooooo.

#the land of stories #incorrect tlos #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect quotes #alex bailey #conner bailey #tlos bailey twins

[thelandofstoriescrack]

Red: Punch me in the face

Goldilocks: ...Punch you?

Red: Yes, punch me, didn't you hear me?

Goldilocks: I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're talking but usually it's subtext

#the land of stories #incorrect tlos quotes #incorrect tlos #incorrect quotes #tlos goldilocks #tlos red riding hood