tearsxinxthexnight

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Hey I think your fanfic sounds awesome, I love reading MIOBI fanfic but there aren't many good ones out there! Tbh I'd be careful with the "forbidden love" aspect because 90% of the time it descends into ridiculous melodrama (even with published authors). Anyhow I'd love to read it when you're finished, Payson was always my favourite character :D Will the other girls be in it?

Hi and thanks! I agree about the forbidden love part. It's always difficult to write Payson/Sasha because of that aspect. All my fics take place in the future since I can't stand the idea of a 17 (?) year old girl getting together with her 10 years older coach. Not only the age difference, but also the part where she's dependent upon her coach. In real life it never ends well and there's too many young girls being taken advantage of by men.  

The good thing about fiction is that I can change things though. And that's why Payson will be 21-22 in this and I'll most likely make Sasha a few years younger than he is and I haven't decided how far the whole love thing is going to go. 

The other girls (minus Emily) will be in it but I'm not sure how big roles they'll have. I think Kim and Becca are going to have bigger parts... Haven't decided yet. 

[tearsxinxthexnight]

It's two years since Payson missed out on the Olympics and she's back to earn her spot as the best gymnast in the country and to the Olympics four years later than planned. A story about friendship, forbidden love but most of all about the love for gymnastics. 

I know most people have gotten over make it or break it. But I'm still in love with the characters. So this is a fanfic I'm going to get started on writing now. So if anyone have any suggestions for the story, let me know. 

#make it or break it #fanfic #make it or break it fanfic #payson keeler #sasha belov #payson/sasha #payson and sasha

[tearsxinxthexnight]

In the hospital room (missing scene from MIOBI 1x10)

Everything was spinning, spinning so quickly Payson couldn’t even grasp one of the many thoughts and emotions in her body. Her parents had left the room to speak with doctors again and the room was quiet. The pain in her lower back was getting worse, and she wanted to ask for painkillers, but at the same time it might be the only thing keeping her sane at the moment. The pain made her stay there, in the bed, not drifting off in crazy land of emotions. She was used to handling pain, physical pain was easier to deal with than emotional pain. A soft knock made Payson open her eyes. She was expecting her parents, or doctors, or even her team mates, but the small brunette standing in her doorway was no one else than her long time competition. ”Hi,” Kelly Parker said and slowly walked into the hospital room. ”How are you doing?” ”I broke my back,” Payson said. It was the first time she said the words out loud. It sounded like something of a joke. Something you said after a nasty fall that could have ended badly. You say I nearly broke my back. But there is no nearly in Payson’s case. She broke her back. ”What?” Kelly’s face fell and she took the last steps toward the bed. ”What does that mean?” Payson shrugged, but instantly regretted the move when the pain shoot through her body. She took a couple of shaky breaths before looking up at the worried girl next to her bed. ”I don’t know yet.” That’s what the doctors and her parents tried to figure out. All Payson knew was that a vertebrae in her lower back was broken, she was in pain but she could move her legs. She tried not to think farther than that. She could move her legs, that had to be a good sign, right? Kelly looked honestly upset and reached out to take Payson’s hand. The heat radiating from the brunettes hand felt comforting. No one had had the time to sit down with her, comforting her. Everyone was just running around, worrying, being sad… ”Congrats to the gold,” Payson offered to break the silence that had filled the room and been verging on awkward. ”Silver.” ”What?” ”I got silver,” Kelly clarified. ”Your teammate Kaylie won gold.” Payson couldn’t hide her surprise, she and Kelly had been far ahead anyone else when she fell on the third rotation. ”What happened?” Kelly shook her head. ”It’s not important now Payson,” she said. ”Please? Distract me, please?” Payson whispered, doing her best to not let the pain take over her mind altogether. She didn’t want any more painkillers, but the pain was bad. Really bad. And she wanted to know what happened. She also wanted to know why her competition was here and not her friends, but she couldn’t ask that, so she kept focusing on the medals. Not pain or friends, she could think about medals. Kelly sat down on the edge of the hospital bed, not letting go of Payson’s hand. ”I… I saw you fall…” Kelly took a deep breath and looked Payson in the eyes. ”I watched you fall and couldn’t get the head back in the game. I was worried for you, scared for myself… I couldn’t focus. So Kaylie won and I came second.” ”I’m sorry,” Payson said. Not because she fell, but because Kelly finished second. Second place is first looser, everyone knows that. It’s a painful position. Not as painful as a broken back, but it still isn't fun. A bitter laugh escaped the brunettes mouth. ”Don’t say that,” Kelly said. ”It’s only medals Payson.” Of course Payson knew that. It was only medals. It was only a sport. Only gymnastics. Except it wasn’t. It was what they had been working toward their whole lives. It was hours of their lives they would never get back. Hours of pain, years of missed childhood. It was years Payson would never have believed she could regret, but what if this was it? What if a fall at nationals was it? A knock on the door pulled Payson out of her thoughts. Into the room walked her parents and two women she assumed were doctors. Kelly rose from the bed and their hands slipped apart. ”Hello Kelly,” Kim said, if she was surprised to see her daughter's competition there she didn’t say anything. ”Mrs. Keeler, Mr. Keeler,” Kelly smiled at the grown-ups before turning back to Payson. ”I’ll go,” she said, voice low. ”Get better, yeah?” Payson nodded. ”Kelly?” she called when the brunette were already on the way out of the room. ”Can I call you sometime?” Kelly nodded and smiled before disappearing. Payson looked at the empty doorway and took a deep breath before shifting her focus to the grown-ups in the room. This was it. This was when her future was decided.

#Make it or break it #Payson Keeler #Kelly Parker #MIOBI #fanfiction #MIOBI fanfic #Payson/Kelly

[tearsxinxthexnight]

MIOBI Fanfic - She found him in a pub

He was standing behind the bar, listening, when Summer told Payson there was nothing Payson could say or do to change his mind. He could hear the air leave her. Could imagine the disappointment. It was difficult to keep quiet, he kept wiping down the same spot on the bar over and over again. Before he could say anything, protest, she was standing in front of him. 

Her eyes were shining, but the strong girl he knew she was didn't shed any tears. Instead she was angry. Every word she threw at him was meant to hurt, and they certainly did. Every word pushed a knife further into his heart, and when she placed the medal on the countertop between them it was the final twist and pull motion causing him to not be able to breathe.

He was about to call after her, make her take the medal back, but when he looked up she was gone. Summer was talking instead. He couldn't focus enough to listen to what she was saying. The only thing he could hear was his heart screaming at him to go after Payson.

"Who was that?" Stefan, one of the regulars, asked with a whistle. "If Americans look like that in real life, then why did you leave?"

Sasha shook his head slowly, looking down at the medal again. If he didn't go after her now, everything would be destroyed. She would never forgive him, not after coming here to beg him to come back. Was this better? Hurt her so much that she would be angry at him? Maybe it was for the best, she would get over it. Forget about him.

"Was that an American gymnast I just saw getting into a taxi?"

Sasha looked up in time to see Chris walking into the pub. He pushed the sunglasses up on his head as he sat down on the barstool Payson had occupied only minutes earlier. But now she was gone. Again. A piece of his heart with her.

"Was that Payson Keeler?" Chris asked, pushing away the empty plate in front of him. "Doesn't look like it was a good talk."

Sasha took a deep breath, letting the air out in a slow sigh. "Wasn't really a talk," he said, filling up two glasses with beer while he spoke. One he pushed over to his childhood friend, the other he took a deep sip from. "Did she scream at you?" Chris asked.

He almost wished she had. The words she told him... Nothing being screamed could have hurt as much. But he deserved it, he reminded himself.

"Why don't you just tell her?" Chris asked.

Sasha took a large sip from the beer before looking up. "She's 17 years old." It was a fact he had to remind himself of every woken moment.

"And you're 27. Are you going to let a number ruin everything?"

He didn't need numbers to ruin anything, he had gotten it done all on his own.

"Do you need me to spill it out for you?" Chris asked with his voice raised. "If you let her leave here crying you have ruined it forever. Do you get that? She won't forgive you for this!"

At his friends words he looked up. Crying? "She was crying?" He asked, the knife was back twisting in his heart again.

"Of course she was, you tool!" Chris shouted. It looked like Chris wanted to punch him in the face, but instead he took a deep breath before he spoke again. This time in a low and collected voice. "Romance or not, this girl came here begging you for everything you've ever dreamed about, and you turned her away. She didn't ask for the sun or the moon or even a star, she just needed you and you turned her away... I hope you're prepared to live with what you just threw away…"

Sasha wanted to protest, but he couldn't breathe. He did this for Payson. The decision had been made with her, and only her, in mind. He wanted to protect her. Keep her safe.

The thought of her leaving, crying, in a cab made him physically sick. He reached for the medal again, letting the metal dig into his fingers as he hugged it tight in his hand.

"It's easier for her to hate me than miss me," he whispered.

"Unfortunately I don't think one excludes the other," Chris said.

He closed his eyes and twisted the ribbon of the metal around his fingers. The picture of her wet eyes kept playing in his mind. He couldn't leave her like that. Alone, angry and with a coach that talked her into gambling with her own health. He took a deep breath, forcing his eyes open again. The red ribbon was cutting of circulation in his finger, but he didn't loosen his grip. He took another deep breath. He could be her coach. He had pushed his own feelings away for almost a year, he could do it again. When it was all over, when she had her Olympic golds and had retired, when he couldn't mess anything up, he would let her make the decision. He could do that. For her.

"Good boy, now go home and get your stuff and get to the train station! I'll cover your shift," Chris said, slapping his shoulder.

Sasha hadn't been aware he'd said anything out loud. Maybe he hadn't and Chris could read it off his face? "Thank you," he told his friend and pulled him into a hug before he let himself be pushed out of the pub.

#make it or break it #make it or break it fanfic #fanfic #payson keeler #sasha belov #payson and sasha #payson/sasha

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Everyone told her it was love, the feeling she had for Sasha. Maybe she believed them. For a while at least. Then she figured it out. Sometimes she thought it would have been easier if it had been Sasha she loved. But then she would look across the gym, dorm room or dinner table, and Kelly would be sitting there. It was in those moments it was laughable really, how she had thought what she felt for her coach had been love.

During the four months leading up to the Olympics the fierce five spend all their time together; training, eating, sleeping and more training. It’s not really a good time for Payson to realize she’s in love with one of her team mates. But the heart wants what the heart wants. And Payson’s heart wants Kelly Parker.

Worth writing? 

#make it or break it #payson keeler #kelly parker #payson and kelly #make it or break it fanfic #miobi #miobi fanfic #fanfic

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Make it or Break it fanfic

It's two years after the Olympics and Payson's life is centered around parties. When her life spirals out of control, who shows up if not Sasha with his hero complex? But Payson doesn't want his help. Contains drugs and alcohol.

First two chapters of my new fan fiction "Pills and Medals" are up on fanfiction.net. 

#make it or break it #payson keeler #payson and sasha #make it or break it fanfiction #fanfic #pills and medals

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Unfortunately I haven't been writing much lately. Have been so stressed about the moving abroad thing. But after next week I hope I'll take the time to write again. I always feel better when I write. I'm almost finished with the new Make it or Break it fanfic, so I really want to write the last chapter of it. Going to post it when it's done. 

#writing #moving abroad #make it or break it #fanfiction

[tearsxinxthexnight]

New Make it or Break it Fanfic!

Writing on a new fanfiction. Already a new one. This one is focused on Payson (like all my previous fics) and it'll probably be 5 chapters. This pictures kinds of illustrates what it's about. 

Anyone interested in reading? I'll finish writing it before I post it though. Will let you know how it goes. 

#make it or break it #payson keeler #fanfiction #make it or break it fanfiction #miobi fanfic #miobi

[tearsxinxthexnight]

The Ten Year Reunion (A Make it or break it Fanfic)

Friday night and last night I uploaded the first two chapters of my The Ten Year Reunion fanfic on fanfiction.net. 

You can read the first chapter here: The Ten Year Reunion. 

The Ten Year Reunion - A Make it or Break it Fanfic It's ten years later and time for a reunion in Boulder. It's almost as long since Payson saw Sasha last and things certainly have changed since then. A fanfiction focused on Payson and Sasha. 

Please let me know what you think, here or on FF.net. Feedback makes me post earlier. I plan on posting the next chapter on Tuesday or Wednesday. It's all written, so hopefully I'll have all six chapters posted within a couple of weeks. 

#make it or break it #make it or break it fanfic #payson keeler #sasha belov #paysha #payson and sasha #fanfic #fanfiction #writing

[tearsxinxthexnight]

While I work on my fic, have a video I made yesterday! 

Please let me know what you think, I'm still trying to figure out iMovie. 

#sasha belov #payson keeler #paysha #payson and sasha #fanvid #music video #stay #rihanna

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Looking for a beta reader

Is anyone is interested in beta a make it or break it fanfic? 

The working title is "The Ten Year Reunion" and it's 6 chapter (22 000 words) and all finished. Or, the first draft is finished anyway. It'll focus on Payson and Sasha. 

Since english isn't my first language I could really need someone that's good with grammar and spelling. 

If you're interested, send me a mail at: 

#make it or break it #make it or break it fanfiction #payson keeler #sasha belov #paysha #payson and sasha #beta #beta request #looking for a beta #fanfiction #fanfiction beta

[tearsxinxthexnight]

I've finished writing a first draft of my new fic The Ten Year Reunion (working title for now). Now starts the editing, and then when I'm happy with it, I'll find a beta to read it for me. It's now on 22029 words :)

#fanfiction #make it or break it #make it or break it fanfiction #payson keeler #sasha belov #paysha #payson and sasha

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Can't write without my cup of coffee

Just read an article about swedes and their coffee drinking. Felt oddly fitting since I was reading it while drinking my fifth or so cup of coffee. The article also brought light to Swedish authors tendencies to add a lot of coffee drinking into their stories/novels. Also felt fitting. I've lost count on the number of times I've characters drinking coffee in my stories. 

#fanfiction #coffee #writing

[tearsxinxthexnight]

A card Payson sent to Sasha after her college graduation. Takes place five years before my fanfic "The ten year reunion". Working on the second to last chapter right now. 16 150 words into it now, might land on 20K. Does anyone know of a good beta who would like to help me out before publishing it on here and on ff.net? Preferably one that's great with grammar and spelling since I'm not a native english speaker. 

A few cheers and words of encouragement would make me write faster ;) jk, it probably wouldn't, but I wouldn't mind it anyway. Working the fastest I can. 

#make it or break it #miobi #miobi fanfic #payson keeler #sasha belov #manip #fanart #paysha

[tearsxinxthexnight]

It's ten years since the Olympics in London and it's time for a reunion for The Rock gymnasts. Payson/Sasha. 6 chapters. 

Anyone interested? Should I finish writing and post it?

#make it or break it #payson keeler #sasha belov #sasha payson #fanfiction

[tearsxinxthexnight]

Payson the Guardian - Characters

I miss my fanfic Payson the Guardian (make it or break it fanfic) that I posted about a year ago, so I thought I would upload some pictures of how I imagined the cast looking as I wrote it. 

Payson Keeler

Becca Keeler

Sasha Belov

Jason (Becca's boyfriend)

Kelly Parker

Austin Tucker

Allie (Kelly and Austin's daughter)

Richard (New York Coach)

Kofi Annan as a gymnastics coach might be the weirdest casting ever, but I can't help it. That's exactly like Richard looks, although Richard smiles more. 

Coach Jonson (Boulder coach)

You can read my fanfiction "Payson the Guardian" here. 

Payson the Guardian is about how Payson has to go back home to Boulder to take care of her 15 year old sister when their parents die in a car crash. 

Let me know what you think :)

#make it or break it #fanfiction #fanfic #payson keeler #sasha belov #payson/sasha #kelly parker #austin tucker #becca keeler #casting a fanfiction #pictures