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stuffingprize · 3 months

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Why ship Agon & Yoichi? It’s not just because they’re both devious geniuses who get each other somewhat—making them compatible enough that they don’t need explicit instruction from each other. It’s also that they have a long history filled with changing dynamics & drama. And because, by & large, Yoichi has a tremendous influence over Agon’s choices throughout the story. For a prideful & super talented villain like Agon, I think that’s quite deep!

~~Part 1~~

AGON KONGO’S EARLY DAYS - Aww man it sure is hard to be so talented

Agon is a boy with an ability that cannot be trained - his Godspeed reaction time. On top of that, he is quick to take up any physically & mentally arduous activity, has great looks, & is naturally strong as hell. And he achieves it all without much effort~

His early days were therefore filled with praise, admiration & envy from everyone around him, including with the one significant relationship during this moment: his twin brother, Unsui.

Too smart for his own good, Unsui resigns himself quite early on, taking the loss as “an average athlete” and tries only to improve Agon’s prospects rather than his own.

Unsui: Then all my effort will have paid off.

Agon: Shut up. That's my plan anyway.

For Agon Kongo during this time, he probably felt there wasn’t anyone he could call an equal..

YOICHI HIRUMA’S EARLY DAYS - I’m going to that fun place now

Yoichi Hiruma as a child feels bored and understimulated. Bright but devious by nature, he one day decides to shake up his humdrum by sneaking into an American Army base at age 10, where he spends his days honing his skills in provocation and intimidation while playing poker with men much older than him.

It is quite apparent that lying and coercion were natural skills to him.

This is also the place where picks the habit of carrying guns, speak in foul English, & learns all about American football. By the time Yoichi enters middle school, he goes through quite a transformation of looks:

Though at first, Yoichi does not consider himself suitable to playing the game himself, there is no denying he is immensely attracted to the strategic angle of it, spending hours drafting formations in his spare time.

For Yoichi Hiruma during this time, perhaps he only dreams of one day commanding a team with players of his own choosing..

AND THEN THEY MEET …wait, who, what, when, where, how??

So how did these two terrors meet? Unfortunately we’re not shown. It is unclear when or how they meet, but we know that it happens before Yoichi decides to play football in Middle School.

Here’s a headcanon: The “book of threats” was likely an idea Yoichi developed long before, just never had a big enough reason to make one yet. Until he needed to. Until he found something he really wanted to pursue with a lot of obstacles in the way: American football (the man already had used cell phone collection boxes placed around..)

Thanks to a series of events in which Ryokan convinces him to play the game, Yoichi sets out to make his infamous book of threats. For that, he calls on an acquaintance for help! That acquaintance was none other than Agon.

↑This is seriously their earliest known on-screen interaction & we’re presented with this dynamic about them: Yoichi calls, Agon fetches. I know Yoichi isn’t one for pleasantries, but he doesn’t even introduce much context, he just points & Agon goes.

SO WHAT WE KNOW:

They meet somewhere during middle school.

They meet outside of school (no shared school)

Coincidentally Agon also goes through a transformation of looks.

Look, look.. I think it’s quite telling that out of ALL places Agon could’ve been during this very early interaction, he’s at a HAIR SALON. Like, he really really could’ve been doing anything else, or be literally anywhere else. But here we are:

The last one, he says… so they’ve already been at this!

Just IMAGINE! From the moment they meet, however or wherever that was, Agon & Yoichi clearly vibe well enough to exchange contact information & then… Agon forgoes his natural blond hair in exchange for dark dreads.

What could it be? He already wore sunglasses, is liked well & is superbly popular. But perhaps upon meeting this young man with pierced ears & bleached hair, Agon got the idea that he wanted a more intimidating look as well?

Why not? Afterall, he becomes Hiruma’s on-demand thug.

Yoichi influences Agon: +1 point! (Agon gets dreads)

And so, for the next two to three years, Yoichi & Agon apparently spend HOURS running around doing this stuff:

Agon beats people for money, Yoichi gets the blackmail.

Ahhh yes bonding through filming naked dudes, errr.. Blackmailing, I mean. Hah? Totally normal

Yoichi influences Agon: +1 point! (Agon as Yoichi’s thug)

If their acquaintanceship formed before Ryokan meddled into Yoichi’s life, then Yoichi has a longer history with Agon than with his friends from Maou. Outside of family relationships, theirs is one of the longest-standing relationships in the series. And with long histories come moments of drama. With Ryokan Kurita in the picture, things begin to go sour.

I was never your friend but I thought you were mine.. a.k.a. AGON’S JEALOUSY OF RYOKAN KURITA

One of the strongest proof for me that a proud man like Agon is in fact very desperately thirsty for Yoichi’s attention is the evidence showing that he views Ryokan as an obstacle. Ryokan.. whom he would openly say is miles beneath him in terms of talent, looks, brains.. You get the picture.

It’s not “I’m glad I kicked you & your loser friends.” Was perhaps Agon expecting or hoping Yoichi would choose to drop Ryokan & still apply for Shinryuji himself? Afterall, there wasn’t anything stopping Yoichi from doing so except friendship.

These are instances where Agon isn’t insulting Yoichi. His beef is with the people Yoichi chooses to associate himself with, most prominently Ryokan & later Sena (more on Sena in part 2!!)

But why the antagonism toward Ryokan specifically? Wasn’t Gen (Musashi) also around? If Agon Kongo were a genius of interpersonal relationships, he might've figured it out. Because the truth is no one in this story changed Yoichi more than Ryokan.

Ryokan is the reason Yoichi starts playing football & why we get to the Deimon Devil Bats & the story of underdog Eyeshield 21. And while we have evidence that Unsui also plays football in middle school, that doesn’t mean Agon had any interest in it. An interaction from Riko’s interview gives us a hint:

Which suggests that when Agon found Yoichi suddenly immersed in the sport, it was something that must’ve surprised him. Meanwhile Yoichi’s comment suggests Agon followed the same “stunt” afterwards.

In fact, for Agon, the decision happened here:

Was it a mere coincidence that Agon was at this particular scene? Maybe he & Yoichi had plans to meet up later but Agon happened to arrive earlier by chance. Or maybe Agon was here on purpose..

Genius Agon who is feared, admired, & envied by all.... who is good at any sport, who has the looks & talent to potentially get anyone he wants, being put aside by someone he kinda somewhat valued..

I mean, given the time they spent together, it’s reasonable to assume Agon enjoyed hanging out with Yoichi. So this scene where Yoichi is having fun with people who have nothing to do with him, Ryokan in a Shinryuji Uniform especially, must've affected his sense of security on a subconscious level. We aren’t shown any other source of antagonism for his messing up with Yoichi's plans. The thing is, deep down, Yoichi is the closest he could consider an equal. Not like he knew it at the time.

Also, while the panel above paints Agon in a clearly antagonistic light, the original magazine run of that panel was actually juicier:

Really, it wouldn’t be far-fetched to interpret this as anger, envy, maybe even betrayal.

Yoichi influences Agon: +2 points! (Agon enters Shinryuji High School. Agon joins a football team)

And so, Agon sets out to destroy what he saw that day so badly that he really decides to attend an all-boys high school despite being a giant womanizer. And when Yoichi confronts him to try to remedy his dick move, Agon decides to cut him off as well, effectively ruining whatever sort of friendship they had.

Alas, their version of a breakup... I've also talked about Yoichi's choice of outfit in this post, heheh!

ALL TO PLAY A SPORT HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE!! Now that's some serious malevolent & jealous-driven commitment!

→Continue to Part 2→

Where I explore Agon's disinterest in Football when it doesn't involve Yoichi, his newfound beef with Sena, Deimon vs Shinryuji & beyond~

#Eyeshield 21 #Yoichi Hiruma #Agon Kongo #agohiru #es21 #osu post #yoiago

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stuffingprize · 3 months

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Why ship Agon & Yoichi? Finally the 3rd & final portion of my long AgoHiru meta post!! Ready to dive in full? Part 1 | Part 2

~~Part 3~~

WORLD YOUTH CUP - A smile worth 3 million

We've reached the final arc!! After the Christmas Bowl, Japan gets a chance at forming an all star high school line-up to play in America. Agon decides to join & we get to see him interact with a wider variety of characters, showing us more of his similarities to Yoichi as he's put in places where he must team up.

Violence, deceit & lack of patience over sentimental speeches #justgeniusdevilthings

Unsurprisingly, he still gives Ryokan lots of flack, refusing to acknowledge him throughout most of the arc despite everyone else agreeing that he is an essential asset to the team.

Truly unbelievable! Agon just can’t stand having Ryokan in the way of his time with Yoichi two years & one lost match later...

On Yoichi's end, however, he doesn't seem to be the type to hold on to grudges. Despite the hurt Agon put his friends through, Yoichi prefers being practical & can put it all aside if it means gaining an ally for his current goals. Ultimately, Agon is a useful player to have & we know that Yoichi is especially fond of those he finds “useful.”

Plus it's fun to see that Yoichi is practically the only person who can talk smack & laugh at Agon's face & get away with it (Mizumachi tried).

Because there are areas where he & Agon just get each other, so Yoichi calls on him to do a Flying Dragon & Criss Cross together during their game against the American team, which they pull off perfectly despite never having played together before.

When Sena & Monta attempted their first Criss Cross against Teikoku, they fumbled the ball bad

Finally, Agon gets a chance to play with Yoichi, & it is absolutely of no surprise to me at all that THIS is the precise moment Agon begins to enjoy football!!!

Agon has smiled plenty on the field before, when his motivation was to “crush those without talent.” Agon has done the Flying Dragon before, with Ikkyu whose talent he praises & his twin whom he actually cares about. But here, his enjoyment is enough to make him laugh. By wordlessly being in sync with Yoichi. Teaming up with & having fun with Yoichi, perhaps like they used to before football.

In fact, Agon was so engrossed in this part of the game that he overlooks Mr. Don coming for him!

Shien (the Kid) is comparing Agon's experience in this moment to the time when he had finally admitted to something he truly wanted during the Hakushuu game!! An interesting insight

Lucky for Agon, Ryokan comes to his aid because winning this game is more important than their drama! (& because he's a sweetheart)

And after these successful series of plays where Agon finally shared the field with Yoichi & friends, we get this small development:

Is this tentatively the beginning of Agon letting go of his hurt & seeing Ryokan for what he truly is?

Although Ikkyu was usually his only exception when it came to adequate teammates, Agon would still say he was best if there were "22 players exactly like me." Here, Agon is opening up to the idea of finding value in other players. In Ryokan. In Yoichi. Even if he still sounds sore over it, it’s progress.

Yoichi influences Agon: +1 point! (Agon tempts teamwork.)

Despite this final arc's ups & downs, I enjoyed the small developments we got for Agon, as well as seeing Yoichi talk to him so casually. We begin to see how they treat each other differently now that they're teammates instead of opponents:

From weariness to fondness…

BONUS POINTS: Agon & Yoichi enjoy playing football together!!

Before reaching the end, there’s still one more topic I’d like to talk about. Why has Yoichi, since so early on, piqued Agon’s interest anyway? It isn't about smarts or attraction, or deviousness. Well maybe just a little bit. Here's what I mean:

CRUSH THE UNTALENTED - Agon's Dissatisfaction

Above is Agon's officially stated no homo reasons for playing football back in vol 20 before Deimon vs Shinryuji. My interpretation being that Agon hates average try-hard players because his brother Unsui IS the average player who resigned himself, which really pisses Agon off because they’re twins & Agon feels his pain.

I personally think that if Unsui hadn't given up on himself so soon, then Agon wouldn't be twice on edge about average players who could be him. It's something that becomes evident in the World Youth Cup arc when he sees Unsui in Habashira & even taunts his brother over it.

And yet Yoichi who also fits the “average try-hard player” is someone Agon continues to be drawn to. We have this insight from Unsui himself during the Ojo vs Deimon rematch:

...Where Agon didn't follow up his usual "HUH??" with anything ridiculing Honjo's words. It's a rare moment that also happens between him & Yoichi back when they used to hang out.

Perhaps one reason Agon so carefully watches Yoichi is because he senses an answer he craves to his perpetual annoyance of average people. See, despite not being physically impressive, Yoichi continues to enthusiastically work towards his impossible goals seemingly undeterred by limitations. He “gets creative.”

Agon is a genius, they have a long history of them trying to read the other out, & yet he still says, "I've never understood this about you."

What is ambition all about? What is something worth struggling for? What good are teammates? I think Agon has always wanted to understand these differences between himself & Yoichi.

Yoichi influences Agon: +10000 points! (Agon’s attitude toward life football changes.)

AND TOUCHDOWN.. or is it? - The Undefeated Saikyodai Wizards

By now, I hope I've proven that Agon is continually influenced by Yoichi & that it largely dictates many of his actions—whether it's to resist & oppose him or simply follow him into whatever interests him next. So it is only natural that Agon would follow Yoichi into college.

Well, it probably helped that Yoichi intentionally chose a different college from Ryokan this time around (lol).

These two devious men who had once teamed up to frame & take advantage of others, then threw each other out, are finally now fighting together for good after six years of back & forth drama..!

And thanks to the recent 21st Anniversary of the series, a Special chapter was published which revealed Saikyo College as the then Undefeated Champions. However, Sena Kobayakawa has joined the fray & the plot revolves around a chance for either Yoichi or Sena to join the NFL. The deciding factor being which team wins—Saikyo or Enma.

Back at the World Youtch Cup arc, Agon heard from Yoichi himself how badly he wanted to join the NFL. With this knowledge in mind, it’s safe to say that Agon not only is now playing because he wants to, but this game in particular because victory means Yoichi's new dream can come true!!

Similar to Gao, Agon once played football to destroy Yoichi's dreams. But now, it’s the opposite!

You see, all along, what Agon wanted was to get himself in the Devil’s sights. What he hated Ryokan for (taking Yoichi through football), what he hated Sena for (being Yoichi’s ace), was now his alone. Agon is the trump card Yoichi can count on..!

Such intense focus!! Agon as Saikyo College's Ultimate Player

Like we saw when they played against the Americans, Yoichi & Agon don’t need explicit instruction from each other. Their compatibility carries on. Wordlessly communicating~~~

Agon-speak for Of course I read you, honey.

With Agon becoming a serious athlete who trains & is now happily playing alongside Yoichi Hiruma, it’s no wonder that their team holds the title of Champions so far…!!

Yoichi influences Agon: +2 points! (Agon attends Saikyo College. Agon plays for the sake of Yoichi’s dream)

>>Yoichi influences Agon, FINAL COUNT: 15+++

AND THUS CONCLUDETH THEIR GET-TOGETHER LOVE STORY!!!

Standing together like this, they make up the titular #21!

Thank you for reading 🏈

#yoichi hiruma #agon kongo #eyeshield 21 #es21 #agohiru #yoiago #osu post

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stuffingprize · 4 months

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in light of the upcoming es21 chapter in the year 2024, should I finally write that one post detailing Agon’s absolute obsession with Yoichi Hiruma throughout the series or nah

EDIT: here’s Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

#osu post #eyeshield 21 #agon kongo #yoichi hiruma #yoiago

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stuffingprize · 3 months

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Why ship Agon & Yoichi? Welcome to the 2nd portion of my long AgoHiru meta post!! I ended up having to break it into 3 parts because of the sheer amount of images. If you missed Part 1, please go HERE.

~~Part 2~~

TWO YEARS LATER - Agon doesn’t care about football.. except when he does

Agon is considered such a high-value player that scouts from University teams & Sports writers come see him play. Unfortunately for them, Agon doesn't actually enjoy football enough nor deems his participation important enough to play full time or train. And yet, when it comes to Yoichi’s new High School team, Agon makes exceptions.

During Sena’s first Deimon vs Ojo match, Agon makes surprising appearance. And he's not only keeping tabs on Yoichi, but also on any interesting newcomers to the team:

Checking out Mamori, downplaying Sena, insulting Yoichi.. tsk tsk

Remember how Agon insults Sena along with Ryokan during Riko’s interview? From the moment Yoichi’s football team begins to boast a new star, Sena becomes Agon’s new target of ire. Sena who, like Ryokan, lacks in areas Agon can excel. Sena who is currently Yoichi’s trump card.. the position that should be Agon’s.

Sena has no power, but his speed gives Deimon a chance at the Christmas Bowl, & Agon can’t stand that. Because at the end of it all, I think his issue isn’t the fact that Yoichi plays football, it’s the fact that he continues to choose his less talented friends to accomplish his goal instead of the "once in a century genius athlete" that is Agon.

For all his talk about playing football to crush those without talent, nothing personally motivates Agon more than playing for the sole purpose of ruining the dream Yoichi has with his friends..

An answer that evokes an image too similar to the one Agon saw the day he decided to join Shinryuji.. Even Riko can tell this topic spells a land mine, oof

Yoichi influences Agon: +2 points! (Agon hates Yoichi’s friends, specifically Ryokan & Sena.)

DEIMON VS SHINRYUJI - Dethroning the Gods

When the chance to play against Deimon finally arrives, Agon, of course, decides to play the game in full, much to the surprise of his teammates. And he quickly escalates to participating in ALL ASPECTS due to Yoichi's continued provocations:

When he finally faces off against Yoichi himself, Agon chops him down the same way he does everyone. But once Yoichi gets a hold of his leg, Agon smashes him to the ground so hard, the demon bleeds!

Such strong aggression.. like some seriously pent up UST

And five minutes after contact, Agon still can’t stop thinking about it hmmmmm

As the match goes on, Agon reluctantly begins to accept Sena as a formidable player, but nonetheless he continues to keep an eye on Yoichi, often bringing up his history with him to assess the potential of Deimon’s plays.

Despite not speaking to each other for two years & the fact that they mostly only hung out for blackmail, Agon knows quite a lot about Yoichi’s stats & play style.

Deimon's match against Shinryuji is SUPER DELIGHTFUL to me for several reasons, especially because:

We got a story of origins: how the Maou trio ended up in Deimon

The Shinryuji Nagas have been set up since vol 6 as the Best Team in all of Kanto, with 9 consecutive championships won

Agon is presented as a personal villain to the our protagonists, which makes winning against his team all the more sweeter

Yukimisu debuts!

It’s the only game where every touchdown was done by a different character

Agon, the once-in-a-century genius had the malicious intent in proving to Yoichi that his team was made up of losers. But he instead ends up getting owned by a variety of Deimon's players, even those who had never before touched the ball in an official match!

By the end of the game, guess what Agon thinks about?

His conversation with Yoichi, and the two players he bashed the most. The end result of this match crushes him so badly that he decides to do the previously unimaginable: to TRAIN.

Yoichi influences Agon: +3 points! (Agon plays a full match. Agon tastes defeat. Agon decides to train!)

And so.. after being bested by Sena, Monta, Ryokan, Katsuki, Manabu & Yoichi Deimon, Agon begins to take the sport seriously, fully intent in seeking another rematch. Another chance to once again prove he’s the best player & that Yoichi should've chosen him.

Oops.. Except that Deimon’s third years don’t get to participate in sports.

See, training soon proves to not be enough for Agon. Not only does Agon keep a close watch on Deimon's next matches, he even goes so far as to try out for Teikoku High after Deimon secures their ticket to their long-coveted Christmals Bowl. Because Agon doesn’t want to wait a whole year for a rematch.

Maybe it's just drama to up the stakes, but taking his history with Yoichi & his tremendous grudge against Yoichi's friends into account, I posit he did it because he knew Deimon’s third years don’t get to play sports. Defeating Deimon without facing Yoichi would feel pretty pointless after all!

A year ago, Agon turned down Teikoku because of how committed he was to staying at Shinryuji specifically but decides to transfer once that wasn’t enough to ruin the dreams Yoichi build with his friends

In any case, Agon goes to watch Deimon vs Ojo in person once again, as well as the Christmas Bowl. As for the Hakushuu match, he only watches it through TV (maybe he couldn't watch Yoichi get crushed in person)

Yoichi influences Agon: +2 points! (Agon tries to get into Teikoku. Agon gets increasingly more invested in football)

→Continue to Part 3→

What’s it like when they finally play on the same team? Where do they go from there? And other bonus topics!

#es21 #eyeshield 21 #yoichi hiruma #agon kongo #agohiru #yoiago #osu post

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stuffingprize · 3 months

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going thru the third rewrite ahhhhhh!!

#yoiago #osu post #still not sure if this outline will hold up tjfjrjd #honestly this post is years in the making I’ve blabbered on abt them before but now it’ll all be compiled in one place

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stuffingprize · 4 months

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what my agohiru meta post is looking like so far…

#sooo many panels i need to clean up for this 😆#im using viz translations so this would be less time consuming if they had es21 digitally o well #also took me a bit to figure out the organization of info #srsly the history they have 🤭🤭#osu post #yoiago

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stuffingprize · 5 years

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Yoichi: *breathes football*

Agon: I can’t believe you’re making me do this. Me? going to an all-boys high school?? & playing a stupid sport like FoOtBaLl!!?? The nerve! The audacity!!! I’m gonna wear the stupid gi! Gonna play a FULL GAME. Then go to the best football college & keep training for this dang sport i hate! All bcuz you!!! won’t!! stop!!! breathing it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#eyeshield 21 #yoichi hiruma #agon kongo #agohiru #yoiago #osu post #yoichi breathes & agon follows & this will continue to haunt me #u can say ‘agon got into football bcuz of unsui’#but then he doesnt train or play a full game UNLESS yoichi is involved so

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stuffingprize · 7 years

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do you ever think abt.. how fancy Yoichi Hiruma was dressed up that day the team went to the Kanto Tournament draws?

I mean, yea to be fair, Everyone was dressed Pretty that time, but Yoichi in particular sticks out to me cuz he’s in Full White when he normally dresses in Plain Black clothes like 98% of the time

but then i remember that agon was gonna be there 👀 👀 after 2 yrs..

& that explains it cuz the one other time he dressed kinda cool was that time he went to specifically meet with agon haha

@agonhirublog

#agohiru #yes i still love these evil brats #Eyeshield 21 #yoichi hiruma #agon kongo #yoiago #osu post

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stuffingprize · 7 years

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I still can’t believe that Yoichi & Agon ended up together in the same college. I just can’t believe it. It’s been years & I still can’t get over this fact.

#does it count as fanservice when they're a pretty unpopular ship? KEKEKE #agohiru #yoichi hiruma #agon kongo #eyeshield 21 #yoiago #osu post #i've been rereading es21 in its entirety #finally in their college years they get together #how many yrs did it take agon?#im still laughin abt this #but also like #holy shit

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stuffingprize · 7 years

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@agonhirublog

here’s the fic! It’s been ages but I still find it hilarious so I hope you enjoy it too. Also, the print didn’t have the author name so ;;;; so sorry author-san!! thank you for writing this story ;;; anyways, NOT MINE, just archiving this for personal AgonHiru enjoyment~~

Title: Death to All Rating: M, Humor/Romance Summary: Sort of Agohiru. Just another day in their life. Y’know another day where Unsui claims he’s going to go insane.

The apartment showed all the signs of being occupied by three lazy teenage boys.

Dishes mounted precariously in the sink. Clothes thrown over all the furniture. Mixed smells of sweat, burned food, and too much cologne. And a dent in the wall where Agon finally got fed up and put Hiruma’s head through it.

They had what could so loosely be described as a routine. Hiruma screamed about cthulus, Agon acted like a vain little girl, and Unsui pretended to be the sane one. Indefinitely, until death do us part, but preferably before.

Today, however, there was something new added to the décor. Instead of the usual, oppressively frightening ‘cult’ movie playing on the teevee (Donne Darko, Clockwork Orange, Rocky Horror Picture show, etc.), Agon was slumped on the couch watching MTV with the sound turned off.

Actually, he wasn’t watching the teevee at all. His head was resting on the back of the couch, an icepack pressed against the left side of his face. His trademark sunglasses were temporarily stashed in his thick brown dreadlocks.

“I tried watching it with the sound on, but I hate all the music,” He said when his one free eye landed on his brother, gesturing vaguely to the teevee. A blonde black woman wriggled her voluptuous bottom at the screen.

“Nothing like Bob Marley, huh?”

“Hey! Bob Marley was more than just another get-rich-quick superstar, okay? He had vision. Not like any of these-” More vague gesturing- “-Wannabe five-second ‘pop’ stars. Whatever. Nobody respects reggae anymore,”

“Huh,” Unsui said, less then interested about his brother’s fetish for slow-beat Jamaican music. He tried to peel the icepack away from his face and saw enough of the angry red bruise to get a quick summary of what happened. “So how hard did he deck you?”

Agon made a face and flicked a handful of dreadlocks over his shoulder. He and Hiruma had a weird relationship to which there was no description. They screamed, they yelled, they tried to tear each other’s faces off. It was pretty amazing to watch- weapons flew overhead, blood splattered onto the walls and every weapon at their disposal exploded in a fiery display of testosterone-fueled frustration. Most of the time, Unsui let them go at it and then quietly cleaned up the disaster when they’d fainted from bloodloss, but when the fights got particularly gory (the time when Hiruma succeeded in ripping of Agon’s nose being the most memorable and recent), he figured it was best if he intervened. Still, when the screaming stopped, whoever was in the best condition staggered to his feet and patched the other one back up.

“Not too hard. It wasn’t so much to break anything as to distract me- he’s gone, if you didn’t notice,” Agon said. He picked up the remote and turned the sound back on. A high-pitched, out-off-tune whine oozed from the screen, followed by repetitive hiphop beat. He shuddered. In a quick flurry of buttons and remotes, the teevee turned off and the CD player turned on. Immediately, one of Hiruma’s Gorgoroth CDs came on. Agon groaned and sunk deeper into the couch.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Unsui said instinctively, although he had no idea whether his statement was true or not.

“I know that,” Agon snarled, gnashing his teeth and pressing the icepack against his face. “Motherfucker freaked out and trying to get out of the apartment anyway he could. He even tried jumping out the fuckin’ window,”

“Huh,” Unsui said, trying to remain unattached to the human drama. What he remembered from past dramas was that Agon liked to exaggerate. It was easier to just stay in the dark and accept that what was directly in front of him was all that he would ever know about what had happened.

“I tried calling him, but he isn’t answering his phone.”

Pause.

“What was he upset about?” Unsui asked, fully aware that Hiruma didn’t always need a reason to blow his top. Agon snorted.

“‘Upset’? God, you have no idea. He was ready to explode. Fucker was waving every gun he had around. When that didn’t work, he tried clawing out my neck. Look at this- look at it!”

Agon peeled his shirt back to show deep, angry red gashes on his neck. It did indeed look like Hiruma had tried to peel out his vocal cords.

“But why?”

“When I get my hands on him, he is so dead. But what to do with him? I could always try cutting off his thumbs...”

“You pull that stunt again, I’ll do the same thing I did last time you tried it. Why was he so pissed off?”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with him, it’s like no matter what, he just-”

“AGON!”

Agon jumped in his seat.

“He found out about Reiko,” He whimpered pitifully.

“Reiko who?” Unsui snapped, in no mood for his brother’s innocent act.

“Reiko Yamamura. She’s this girl I’ve been seeing for a couple of weeks and-”

“Oh my gawd,” Unsui groaned. He threw his bag as hard as possible on the floor. “That’s it- I don’t care anymore. You two can kill each, for all I care. Just don’t get any blood in my room,”

“What? What?” Agon barked, jumping to his feet. Gorgoroth CD and icepack suddenly forgotten. “Don’t tell me you’re seeing his side of the argument!”

“I, personally, think it’s rude to cheat on someone, particularly with a member of the opposite sex,”

“Oh come on. It’s nothing serious, we just go see a movie once in a while and- Holy shit, this is the same conversation I had with Hiruma.”

“It isn’t making too different an impact on me, either,” Unsui snarled.

“It isn’t a big deal!”

“You keep saying that- that big bruise on the left side of your face is saying otherwise,”

“Gimme a break- it’s just so people don’t start rumors behind my back. I don’t want to deal with stupid questions and stupider people. Reiko’s more like protective camouflage than anything,”

“The fuck are you talking about, ‘protective camouflage’? You hold his hand in public!”

“So?”

“So if you don’t want people to start rumors, maybe you should dump the bitch and cut back on the gay PDA,”

“But I like holding his hand,” Agon whined. Unsui rolled his eyes.

“Make up your fucking mind! Do you want people to think you’re gay or not?”

“No,” Agon said, a little too quickly.

“And yet you are,”

“No I’m not. I like girls,”

“And guys,”

“And guys, yes,”

“That makes you gay,”

“That makes me bi,” Agon said defensively.

“Y’know, I hope Hiruma kills you,” Unsui snarled. “You’re slime. You don’t deserve to live,”

“Fuck you! You’d say that about your own brother?”

“If he turns out the way you did, then yes!”

“We have the same DNA!” Agon proclaimed dramatically. Classic tactic.

“But not the same ego,” Unsui shot back.

“Unsuiiii-ii-iii,” Agon whined, the huge bruise on the left side of his face disfiguring his ‘pleading’ look.

“What?” He snarled.

And then, like a sign from God signaling Unui’s temporary dislodgment from the argument, the phone rang.

Once.

Twice.

“I’ll get it,” Agon mumbled, staggering over to the phone. “Hello...?”

Unsui took the break in the conversation to toss his bag onto his bed and inhale a handful of aspirin from the industrial-size bottle Musashi had so kindly stolen from the pharmacy across the street when he saw the state of the apartment. Most of it was already gone.

When he walked back in the the living room, Agon was arguing with whoever was on the other end of the line.

“What? ...but baby- No, I’m- But I thought- Look- Look- Let me finish my goddamn sentence!”

The high-pitched howling coming from the other end of the tiny speaker didn’t let him finish his sentence. It didn’t even let him start one. Unsui watched Agon’s face twist into a whole spectrum of emotions as the screaming went from fury to desperation to dejected sobbing, without him having to say a word.

And then the phone abruptly cut off and Agon was left staring at the receiver like it had the plague.

“God-”

Agon lifted the receiver over his head, his knuckles turning white from the tension. Unsui quietly shuffled out of tantrum range.

“DAMMIT!” He howled, throwing the phone full-force at a wall. It shattered like glass, raining phone organs onto what Unsui immediately recognized as the ominous Pile of Unpaid Bills.

Unsui counted to a high number, took a few deep breathes, went back into the bathroom, swallowed some more aspirin, and tried to summon up enough rage to match Hiruma in a screaming match.

When he walked back into the living room, Agon was throwing himself against the wall and screaming obscenities. He kicked the Pile of Unpaid Bills and stamped his feet like a little kid who’d just dropped his lollipop.

His sunglasses fell out of his hair and to their doom under his pounding feet. Cheap plastic sliced into his foot and he howled, throwing himself theatrically back against the couch. Unsui waited for the bawling to die down.

“SHUT UP!” He roared.

Agon’s mouth clamped shut instantly. Unsui massaged his forehead. When he looked back up, Agon was picking plastic out of his foot.

“That’s gross- knock that off. I’ll get some antiseptic,” Unsui grumbled. He slammed the industrial-sized aspirin bottle on the nearest flat surface and stormed back in to the bathroom. The antiseptic was waiting for him, perched in the medicine cabinet expectantly. He swore the little can looked smug.

“You shut up, too,” He growled at it, snatching it up and storming back into the living room. Agon was picking at his foot with a pair of tweezers.

“Didn’t I tell you to knock that off?” Unsui snarled, snatching up the tweezers out of his hand. “You’re gonna get it all infected and shit,” He sprayed some antiseptic on the cut, then handed Agon the tweezers.

“There- knock yourself out,”

“What, that’s it?” Agon whined.

“Yes that’s it! I’m not digging around in your nasty foot just to peel the plastic from your sunglasses out of it,”

“Damn, I coulda done that myself,” Agon grumbled, bending back over his foot.

“But you didn’t,” Unsui snapped. He slammed the antiseptic onto the table and snatched the aspirin up in the same movement.

“So what happened?”

“Now Reiko found out about Hiruma! Jeezus. I can’t believe this,”

“How?”

“How do you think? Next time I see him, I’m gonna kill him. Oh, and you won’t believe this- she was going on and on about how much she liked me and how many of her friends she was going to tell and shit like that. Like I fucking care!”

“Wasn’t the whole reason you were going out with her in the first place because you cared about people starting rumours?”

“Traitor! Judas! You’re next, y’know that? After them, I’m coming after you! You’re all gonna die!” Agon roared, waving the tweezers like a baton. “Right after I’m done picking plastic shit out of my foot,”

“Shut up,” Unsui advised. He slumped on the couch next to his brother and waited for him to finish picking plastic out of his foot.

He let his head fall back and stared quietly at the ceiling, doing his best to ignore Agon’s muttering. He didn’t need this. Not every day, at least. Maybe every once in a while he could pack up a change of clothes, some money and his toothbrush and go crash at a friend’s house. No need to sit here every night and wait for the roof to finally give up and cave in.

And the whole thing was Agon’s fault. Completely and totally. Unsui would never have offered that Hiruma sleep on the couch, no matter how cold the weather outside was getting. In fact, he probably would have let the fucker freeze. But Agon was insistent about the fact that Hiruma be given a place to sleep.

The original arrangement was that after school, Hiruma would unrolled the sofabed and then protected his personal space with homicidal ferocity. Then Agon convinced Unsui to sleep on the couch and Hiruma’s highly-protected personal space started to shrink rapidly.

Agon poked him in the ribs.

“You hear that?” Agon hissed.

Unsui sat up a little straighter.

“Hear what?” He asked. That was a stupid question. He knew exactly what he was supposed to be listening for, because he could hear the footsteps storming up the stairs just as well as Agon could.

“It’s him. I know it’s him,” Agon snarled, setting down the tweezers with every intention of walking over to the door and smacking whatever was walking past clean through a wall, regardless of foot injury or the possibility that it wasn’t Hiruma.

“Sit down!” Unsui barked. “You were in too much pain to so much as pick up the tweezers five minutes ago, remember? Stay that way!”

Agon snatched the tweezers back up and gave Unsui a look of pure loathing. Unsui ignored him, turning his attention back to the sounds of footsteps in the hall way. Please keep walking, he prayed silently.

The feet stopped at their door. Unsui squeezed his eyes shut and gave God one last chance to prove to a life-long atheist that he really did exist. Maybe it was one of their parents.

Agon rose slowly to his feet, hissing softly.

“Sit. Down.” Unsui said dangerously. Agon glared at him, then sunk back into this seat. Someone was rattling with the doorknob. Mr. and Mrs. Kongou had keys to the apartment, but Agon had never bothered getting Hiruma a key. Either Agon dragged Hiruma back into the house, or he picked the lock open. And somebody was picking the lock open.

Unsui dove for his room. The door slammed open.

“Bastard!” Agon roared, tossing the tweezers full-force at the entrance. Unsui hit the floor and rolled into the doorframe of his room.

#that's it! that's how it ends! but i just.. i laugh every time #such chaotic bfs #YoiAgo #fanfic

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