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#why did my brain auto-fixate on him in particular??
juniperarts · 9 months
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HEYYY, CAN YOU PLEASE DRAW MORE PAVITR PRABHAKAR ARTWORKS/DOODLES?!! I'VE BEEN LITERALLY IN HEAVEN WITH YOUR SPELLBINDING ARTSTYLE!!! IT'S MY MOST FAV FANART!!!
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE GOING TO DO MORE PAVITR FANART PLEASE I'M LITERALLY IN HEAVEN WHEN I SEE THEM😭❤️❤️❤️
PS: Sorry if I came as too much, I just ADORE your art so much and I really need more of it😭😭😭❤️💗💖💖❤️
I already adore that boy and want to draw him all the time and this is just FUELING ME TO DO SO DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU'RE DOING??
I've been trying to be ... chill ... with my appreciation towards him but now you're giving me the enablement I need to do the opposite.
You better take responsibility 🤣
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Nah but fr I'm glad you enjoy my stuff with him! It feels like there aren't as many artists fixated on Pav as they are with, say, Hobie or Miguel so I will do my best to provide more art/comics of him!
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ofravensandgenesis · 4 years
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IT IS FINISHED no seriously, this took ages. First couple of days were fine and motoring along with progress, then I was laid out for a week-ish with health problems. Then once I was well enough again I was back to being fixated on finishing this piece of my lad Joshua here for another handful of days, so I’m super glad this is done now. More talk about the painting, details and process under the cut:
Art Entry 01, Joshua Rook, Junior Deputy of Hope County. Regarding the painting’s execution, stylistic choices, practiced methods, and speculation on further experimentation for skill and stylization. _____________________________ Honestly I thought that the uniform’s large swatches of green fabric would be more difficult than it actually was. Turns out that was the easier part compared to the shoulder patch and metal badge. x’D The metal badge design is based off of and inspired by a custom-ordered cosplay badge design I found while looking for references, in this post here (link,) from v-i-d-e-n-o-i-r’s blog and Far Cry 5 cosplay. There are some differences in the painting’s rendition above, namely I flattened the middle section and made it all concentric polished metal instead of painted and the great seal rendition in the middle doesn’t have silver lineart either. Those choices are as much for aesthetic reasons of eliminating the blue ring so it was all a fairly simple mono-material-looking surface as it was for simplifying having to forego painting the foreshortening that a spherical dome might entail. Also just because the rest of the metal turned out looking good enough that an additional bit of shiny metal seemed like it’d fit right in for this. That being said, the badge design that inspired this one is rad and awesome looking—and I totally didn’t realize it wasn’t quite like the badges from in-game assets until after I’d painted it. x’D So, I decided to stick with this one since it’s simpler and has cleaner lines, and less engraving to pick out highlights on. Metal is very hit or miss for me to get right, so I’m very pleased with how this one came out! :D I think I did well on that one. The shoulder patch originally I was looking at real world references and ended up changing the shape once I actually looked at in-game references on Staci and Joey—who I discovered have slightly different details on their uniforms, like the font for their name tags—Staci’s has an old-timey-looking-font with serifs, Joey’s is a non-serif more modern-style font. Some pictures have them having different buttons on their uniforms either in color or shape (the former being exported assets, the latter being in-game gifs/screenies/etc.) This is also how I learned that the little landscape with the shovel, pickaxe and plough/plow are part of the great seal of Montana. I had no flipping idea that was what it was, looking at the patches in-game. The cosplay community does some great work for that, for which I’m grateful. I ended up looking up references of what the state seal’s design was so as to see the smaller details, and to find out what the motto meant ”Oro y Plata,” meant, leading to etymology googling adventures from there, as usual. All important details to paint though I think here, since Joshua’s deputy uniform is symbolically significant to him and will remain so throughout his story as part of his internal conflict for a couple of reasons. One thing I knew I should’ve done from the start, and reminded myself to do, was the fact that I should paint all skin sections at the same time, so as to ensure they all came out the same shades. I did not do this. x’D I’ll have to actually try to do that next time honestly. Same with the hair sections, while I like how they came out, I do feel the differences between the three major segments in terms of brushwork is not as coherent as I’d like, even if beard hair is not necessarily similar in how it lays to scalp hair, particularly with length and such taken into consideration. Still, not bad. Could’ve used more refs for the backlighting and figuring out how the highlights would fit best on the ponytail, but I think the hair curves turned out nice there in particular. Overall, Joshua’s hair ended up messier than I’d thought with how the locks all end up looping this way and that across his head, but it does actually fit him well as a character for his hairstyle to be messy and loosely held together, but functional. It did end up longer than I’d intended, so we have him likely ending up with a nerdy Jesus hairstyle when it’s down. x’D (Thanks to @undead-gearhead​ for that mental imagery, I shall take great amusement in that should I get around to drawing Joshua with his hair down.) Aside from that, I think I’m slowly improving on figuring out how to paint glasses, though I’m thinking in the future I should test more layered reflective light on them or something where the frames are in contact or close to skin, particularly around the glasses’ bridge across the nose and such. Then there are the other deviation details added—like using dark green instead of the black for the uniform accents. The faded black looks great in-game, but I do think the buttons pop more against dark green instead for this painting. I’m a little bit surprised how well the button-placket section came out, Clip Studio Paint crashed when I painted the first rendition of it, sadly losing all that work. I thought it’d be okay but turns out it didn’t quite get to auto-save that recently enough, but the second go around turned out quite well I think, possibly better. I was originally planning to try to put more textured brushwork across the flat sections of the uniform material, but decided to skip it for speed—I’ll test that elsewhere perhaps, though I think it came out well with the watercolor brushes layered on top of one another like that as is. Among the other smaller details, there’s some tweaks and such for how Joshua’s eye shape, eyebrows, nose shape, hairline etc came out compared to references of Greg Bryk in his role as Joseph Seed. I think Joshua did come out looking like he’s obviously related to the Seeds as I was hoping for, but I’m kind of on the fence that people would look at him and automatically assume it’s Joseph specifically that he’s descended from. I hope so, but either way, that’s how he’s written in-fic. x’D Overall, I would consider this painting a success, though as usual I do wish it’d been faster to finish. I do think this was good practice for detail work, and metal shading, also: buttons. Still haven’t figured out how to paint lips with more pink or red tones, I don’t like the way they look when painted sadly, unless it’s lipstick. That may end up being a stylistic element perhaps, along with how I paint the lines for fingernails and other such details. Fun fact: I have to leave the shading on the eyes for last, or else my brain goes “The eyes are done! We’re done! Call it a day.” I’m not sure why, but so far, leaving them as flats until the end seems to work a treat for keeping me focused on finishing the rest of the work with less mental dissonance. Now if only I could figure out why despite knowing I should do all the exposed skin portions at the same time, I don’t follow through on that naturally as far as inclinations go. Maybe it’s a layer organization thing and perception of wanting, say, the cloth to be done first before working “down” to the hands and such in the sense of working from the head down? I’ll have to think on that some more and test things in the next painting. Perhaps color coding the order of layers to paint will help? CSP does have a nice layer-icon-color function that I’ve dabbled with here and there. There are so many brushes, I really do need to test out more of them, I use, what, four or five total, but primarily somewhere around two or three. Hm, but what to do with texture, and how to utilize it so? Hmmm, as far as personal appeal for methodology goes, I might prefer to use textures in select pieces for more emotional emphasis? If I can figure out how to do that in a messier speed-paint style of things. Rougher textures for conflict, for example. That sounds like an interesting idea to explore, I’ll have to remember that for a later piece. Maybe more heavily textured brushes will also help with the mental itch to refine things to a cleaner-level of refining instead of leaving it in a more organically rough state. Hm, maybe it’s a “mental texture” aversion or something, as far as an interplay between the brush’s texture and the flow of the linework/brushstroke. Perhaps more uneven brushes echo that in a complimentary fashion to better allow less mental discomfort for me personally when trying to paint in a faster, looser fashion? Honestly, very tempting to go try that out sooner rather than later on some art ideas I have, but I’ve been missing my writing very much of late with two time-demanding paintings back to back. So, ideas for a later time to experiment with.
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whatfallsaway · 7 years
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Seeing
I have no freaking idea what is happening or what I am doing. I woke up this morning and wrote this down. I am scared shitless but @therobbinsnest told me to “GET UP AND STOP HIDING” so that is what I am doing….. I’m not fancy enough to know how to put things or post things…I just read and read and read and now I’m hyperventilating so there’s that too….oh and my hands are shaking and I’m going to barf up my own heart as soon as I push post….so ta-da!
This is my first ever fan-fic story. Written, posted. The whole nine yards.
Seeing - MSR, angst-ish, PG-13 (guessing), set in my head so no particular time in the CC universe.
The seminar is long. Tediously long. She is only half-listening which is not at all like her. She isn’t even looking at the speaker.  She is preoccupied with watching him. Her eyes are only on him.
He is fidgeting.
When is he not fidgeting? She thinks.
She watches his hands.  Long fingers, smooth nails.  His pencil draws lazy ovals on his notepad. Over and over and over. Her eyes track the lead and the path. Tiny loopy ovals.
Tiny UFOs.
Of course his mind is elsewhere. It always is. She muses.
Still, she watches his hand draw circles over and over and over again. Hypnotic. Soothing her in a lulling way. The rest of the room fades away. She exhales slowly and shifts her gaze to his mouth.
He sucks a crumpled straw in between his lips, his teeth. The remnant of the soda he drank during their forced lunch break. His knuckles twist the plastic tightly, his teeth gnaw so gently, his lips so so so…
She leans into his space and close to his ear.
“Not get enough lunch?” she jokes raising her eyebrow.
“I need dessert.” he whispers turning his mouth to graze her ear.
He lingers on the sssss of dessert like he sometimes draws out the Sssss of Scully.
A snake charmer indeed.
She looks at him. There is a glint in his eyes. Her curiosity piqued. His eyebrows raise and the corners of his mouth twinge slightly.
He’s bored. The rational part of her brain reminds her. He wants to play. He wants you to distract him, but you really should get him back on task.  Get him focused again.  That’s your job.
She closes her eyes and leans into his space again defying herself in one quiet move.
“What kind of dessert?” she playfully lobs back drawing out the ssssss for effect. Two can play this game she thinks. Her eyes open to meet his.
He inhales slowly. She watches his chest fill with air. He exhales a whispered ‘YOU’ into her ear.
He backs away out of her space, keeps breathing and refocuses his energy on the speaker at the front of the room.  He stops drawing lazy ovals and taps in his pencil instead.  
She watches the tap, tap tapping like a tick tock tocking of a minute hand.
Game. Set. Match. Mulder.
Scully was not expecting that return. She is stunned and suddenly aware of everything. Her reality snaps back into sharp focus.
What? What did he say? Her brain demands understanding. Did he say, you? As in me? Did he say that?
She turns to look at his profile. He is now fixated on the chart and graph projected on the screen at the front of the room.  The speaker is droning on.  Scully can’t hear the words, she only sees Mulder watching.  His chest rises and falls in a rhythm she attempts to mimic. She blinks rapidly.
Did I imagine that? She asks herself. Did I hear him properly? Why would he say that? Did he say that? She shakes her head gently. He’s bored. He’s playing. He’s pushing my buttons. She nods to herself. Her brain is working overtime to explain it. Imagination is a powerful tool. I must have been daydreaming.  I imagined it. I created this delusion to get through this dry dull seminar. She rationalizes and lands firmly on her conclusion.
Scully is so focussed on her thoughts she doesn’t notice that the presentation ends. The room applauds, Mulder pushes his chair back, drops the gnawed on straw, stretches and stands then makes his way to the front of the room where a small group of people have gathered with further questions.
“Dana?” A voice asks cheerily.
Scully is jolted back to the here and now and glances to the table to see the abandoned straw. She looks shocked at the empty Mulder-less chair.
“Are you and Mulder coming to the reception at Agent Robbins’ house?”
“What? Oh, um, I’m, um, not sure.” Scully fumbles for an answer.
The ‘YOU’ is occupying too much space in her brain to find the words to participate in this small inane chit chat. Her firm rational conclusion is having doubts. That singular ‘YOU’ is unhinging her in immeasurable ways.
Three letters may be her undoing.
“You should. It’s always a fun way to end these seminars. There’s a BBQ, pool, music and of course drinks!” the voice chirps.
“Sounds…good…” Scully says automatically.
Surely this faceless person realizes she is not paying attention. Scully is desperately trying to ground herself.  The echoed ‘YOU’ is pulling her away further and further away from the ground.  She is nodding at appropriate places, she assumes, as she sees the lips of the drone prattle on about the party. Scully begins to gather her papers and her things. She picks the crumpled straw up in her fingers. She can hear his exhaled ‘YOU’ on the side of her face. She must regain control before she floats away. She drops the straw and snaps her head over to the voice.
“What did you say?” Scully grapples for solid ground.
“Oh, I said they always have the best desserts at the party” the voice repeats.
Scully can feel herself blush. She dips her head and her heart begins to thump in her chest.  She can see his lips moving in her mind’s eye over and over.
I need dessert. YOU.   I need dessert. YOU. YOU. YOU.
And suddenly she can feel eyes on her. His eyes on her. Years of training tell her he isn’t close by, but she knows he is watching her closely. She can sense him. Her body can feel him.
“Is there a map to the party?” Scully asks trying to pretend she is listening.
The voice is fumbling in a bag and pulling out a piece of paper to draw crude directions for Scully. She nods indifferently while not listening to the instructions. Her eyes are busy scanning the room.
For him. 
He is standing directly in front of her at the front of the room. He is separated by tables, chairs and people milling around post seminar, but his eyes are locked on her. Make no mistake about it. When she finds him, his eyes, she breathes in sharply.
“Are you ok?” the voice asks.
“I’m fine.” Scully spews on auto-response.
“Well.  Great! See you there!” And the voice is gone.
“See. You. There.” Scully sputters, her eyes never leaving Mulder’s eyes across the room.
What. Is. Happening. Her brain demands.
He is not moving. He is only staring. At her. Into her eyes. Into the blue. Into the very core of her own self.
The room changes. The air changes. Everything changes. There is only a buzzing in her ears. She is trying to focus. She can’t look away. She can’t break this gaze. She can only see his eyes.
On her. 
They are magnets.
Hazel eyes to blue eyes.
Pulling. Drawing. Seeking. Asking. Needing. Finding.
Her skin hums. Her blood charges. Her cells electric. Waiting for contact.  Waiting for connection.  Waiting for the homecoming.
Mulder may get his wish of witnessing spontaneous human combustion. She concedes.
He suddenly strides toward her, eyes never breaking the look between them. A hunter descending upon his prey.  Mulder loops his gaze over her body as he slowly approaches. Long lazy ovals, his eyes now the pencil over her body. Long, lazy ovals, over and over and over again. Over her.
She is dizzy drunk in her desire.
Desire? Her brain scolds her one last time, desperate for sure footing.
She blinks her eyes shut. Her lips part, breathing shallow as he reaches her. She opens her eyes. He is still locked onto her.  Never blinking. Intense. He licks his lips. She mirrors his actions. Eyes locked. Each leaning into each others’ space.
Time stops.
“Do you have any idea where we are going?” Scully exhales into the silence, as time restarts.
“I know exactly where we are going.” Mulder whispers into her neck.
He snakes his hand around her waist and stops on the small of her back. She feels the heat of his hand mingle with the hum of her body. He guides her out of the seminar room.
She swears she can see blue sparks emitting between them as they walk.
But but but that would unfounded, unscientific, irrational, improbable, even impossible! Her brain reminds her.
She smiles, as her feet finally float from the ground, for the impossible.
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