#wendy honey u deserved better | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mattelektras · 5 years

Note

*kneels before the altar, giving offerings to the Queen of Marvel Criticism* miss jessie...... i know youve seen endgame. please give us ur thoughts. ur wisdom

you really shouldn’t encourage me to be a bitch because i WILL do it and it WILL go to my head but here we go

first of all. if i may. sam wilson i would give my life for you…… the flying in front of the gold portal things looking like the angel that he is. giving sam the shield really was the only smart thing steve did this entire movie

speaking of. like i KNOW steve can weird mjolnir in the comics. but that steve is a very different person and shitting all over thor this entire movie and then giving steve his signature weapon is…. just…. insulting like….. it really diminishes who and what thor is to just have this dude pick up his weapon and just KNOW how to use it despite never having any training with anything even SLIGHTLY similar. I’m picky in comics about who can wield mjolnir and ever moreso in the mcu. just don’t like it ladies

also steve conducting group therapy sessions??? this bitch is not qualified

carol just wasn’t in the fucking movie lmao like…. they wrote out both of their main women and were like. oh thank god the men can SPEAK for once

she just shows up when they need an easy out in the plot

the vormir thing…. it was a very nat thing to do. like she would sacrifice herself like that and it did give me a glimpse of comic nat for the first time since cap 2. but she shouldn’t have HAD to, of all the people she shouldn’t have been the one because putting her against clint who’s more important because he has a family or whatever now, never mind the fact that he’s been beheading people here and there for years, when she has nothing and has tried so hard to be better is like… we’re really just gonna throw that all away. even the weak version of nat that mcc nat is didn’t deserve that. and her memorial was shit

i literally cannot even physically comprehend what they did to thor. all i have to say is he’s still a real one because he knows valkyrie’s made to be king of asgard

peter curling up on the ground when the missiles came down like…. god. honey sweetie baby im sorry i was ever mean about a third spiderman movie saga. i was right but still im sorry

why was there sexy romance music playing when hulk met the ancient one like i straight up thought they were gonna fuck right there on the roof and i cannot explain the emotion that gave me

hulk in general im fucking TERRIFIED…. THEY JUST MADE RUFFALO’S HEAD LIKE…… FUCKIN MASSIVE and why does he dress like an instagram influencer

scott lang OUTSOLD. the only man with a brain int his movie

i dont like. CARE for mcu tony i think he’s over done but the mcu starting with ‘i am iron man’ and ending with it was a lot. i like comics tony a lot so it did give me a lil. emotion as it were. against my better judgement

RESCUEEEEEEEE…. AND ONLY 10 YEARS TOO LATE

tony’s kid was… adorable

it was the right time for tony to die, and the right death, i think. like i said i’ll be glad to not see rdj’s face anymore but it was a good death and rhodey and pepper being there and just kind of. KNOWING it was over for him was moving

some of you dumbasses really thought the girl with the bow and arrow was gonna be kate… i love you but please use your brains this is the mcu

time travel just doesn’t work for me in movies that dont REVOLVE around time travel. it just feels like a special episode of a cartoon, and its a huge excuse to cop out . and u just end up with plotholes coming out of your eyeballs

FUCK vision lives. he got the screen time he deserved

valkyrie got her pegasus…….ethereal

the women’s teamup at the end wasnt the moment it would have been if the mcu had given a fuck about their women from the start

and again, wendy’s moment would’ve been a moment if she was actually wanda

STEVE YOU DUMBASS BITCH none of his ending meshes with ANYTHING else he’s done in the entire series. and as much as i dont give a fuck about peggy, it messes with her too like. she moved on she had a family, they both made peace with their ending. but everyone working on the movie obviously decided that the last 10 years isn’t really relevant and fuck sharon carter i suppose. let’s go w the most boring bitch alive

“the lgbt character won’t be who you expect!!!!” do you think im a moron?????? as if i expected anything other than an unnamed character who just vaguely referenced dating a man. i will not be clowned this time nor ever again

was there….a little hint of carol/rhodey perhaps……. dont care for the ship in comics but i like mcu carol and god i want good things for rhodey

and speaking of. i would’ve preferred to have seen tony’s kid to have a moment with rhodey in the end instead of the other dude like. you’re telling me rhodey isn’t that kid’s godfather???? that pepper and rhodey aren’t gonna be the best platonic parenting duo since the dawn of time???

the thanos plot was dumb ass hell like. it relied ENTIRELY on him lucking out and finding nebula. that’s not a good big bad plot because he doesnt actually DO shit

nebula is never gonna get the respect she deserves for what she did in this movie

tldr this all sounds very mean but it was definitely better than i thought it was gonna be. and better than the first half. were were some references back to the last 10 years that were really nice, and as much as i do criticise the mcu, its TEN years of my life so the callbacks were nice. they just… should’ve spent less time on them and more time on a plot and endings for their characters that make sense

#endgame spoilers #anonymous #q & a

47 notes · View notes

asiryn · 5 years

Text

so hey.......y’all remember when i said that sometimes, just for fun and the hell of it, i make lists of “endgame” ships in my fandoms? bc yeah, that’s a thing that i do sometimes. XD

having now finished kh3, i’ve finally finished my endgame ship list for kh, and i figured that it might be a fun thing to share!

the actual list i’m gonna put behind a cut, bc it’ll be hella long (bc seriously.....i put about 95% of the characters into ships, and this includes all of the humanoid-ish disney characters too (barring most of the villains, bc....well, those characters are dead)), but before that, i’ll give you some....idk, context behind this list.

keep in mind, this entire affair is just like........gonna involve a fuck-ton of indulgence on my part. and most of this is fairly light-hearted. most importantly of all, this is pretty much a self-challenge: i paired up the majority of the characters just to see if i could, with the additional challenge that i could only pair them with characters that actually, canonically, have appeared in kh (this means that i couldn’t substitute in other final fantasy or disney characters); i did this to see how creative i could get with my ships, really.

idk if i’ll ever actually get around to writing fanfic for this verse (tho i do have a lot of headcanons, and i’ve actually put (probably far too much) thought into how i think these ships would work/come about, and my long-suffering friend Ip, bless her, has been an incredibly good sport about being a sounding board for all this), but i tend to refer to it as my “Healing Vision”, and it’s basically a post-kh3 AU, that presumes that everyone but xehanort (and also eraqus) got to live happily ever after. and this verse is so named bc, apart from everyone being able to heal and be happy after the traumatic canon, i also wanted to do my absolute best to put them in.....idk, healthy ships, and not ones that i think would be more toxic. everyone had redemption arcs, is what i’m saying (even if they never did or would have gotten them in canon).

y’all don’t understand, at this point i probably have over a hundred pages in various word docs of notes about this verse, so please feel free to ask if you want to hear more about it, i need validation of my madness---

anyway, here we go!

just so that there isn’t just a massive wall of text, i’m gonna break this up into roughly 2 sections: square/original kh characters, and then the rest of the disney characters.

Square/original KH characters:

Olette/Xion/Namine/Sora/Riku [OXN, SoNami, & SoRiku], Shiki/Kairi/Selphie, Axel/Saix, Hayner/Roxas, Terra/Cinderella, Aqua/Larxene/Yuffie, Repliku/Vanitas, Ven/Beat [more friends w/ benefits], Xigbar/Luxord, Aeleus/Even, Ienzo/Demyx, Sora’s Mom/Dilan, (Cinderella’s) Prince Charming/Marluxia, Geppetto/Ansem, Tidus/Wakka, Zack/Cloud/Leon, Aerith/Tifa, Cid/Auron, Fuu/Tinker Bell, Seifer/Rai, Jack Sparrow/Setzer, Boo/Vivi [platonic], Rikku/Paine, Yuna/Elsa, Neku/Joshua, Rhyme/Snow White, Hiro/Pence, & Eraqus/Xehanort [together in death]

i have no idea what’s going on with the khux characters going forward, and atm they don’t really have anything to do this AU, but assuming they’re alive and they’re all their own characters, at least for the time being, those ships would be: Skuld/Strelitzia, Ava/Ephemer, Invi/Ira/Aced, Gula/Brain, and Sephiroth/Master of Masters (but again, these are more tentative, and i don’t actually care about these characters, really)

Disney characters:

(again, keep in mind that these are only the humanoid or really anthropomorphic characters; ones that are straight up animals, like simba for example, were not included)

Mickey/Minnie/Daisy/Donald/Goofy [M/M, D/D, MinDaisy, & qpt Donald/Goofy], Horace Horsecollar/Pete, Clarabelle Cow/Clara Cluck, Hercules/Meg, Tarzan/Jane, Aladdin/Jasmine, Ariel/Eric, Belle/Beast, Lumiere/Cogsworth, Will/Elizabeth, Quasimodo/Phoebus/Esmeralda, Kristoff/Anna/Rapunzel/Eugene, Maleficent/Aurora/Mulan/Shang/Phillip [Malora, Philora, Mulora, Mulan/Shang, Phillip/Shang], Alice/Wendy, Peter/Wendy [qpt], Peter/Tinker Bell [qpt], (BatB) Chip/Pinocchio, Anastasia/Chien Po, Yao/Prince (from Snow White), Ling/Drizella, Merlin/Yen Sid, Hades/Genie, Mrs. Potts/Flora, Merryweather/Triton, Hook/Smee, Doc/Grumpy, Blue Fairy/Dopey, Fairy Godmother/Happy, Fauna/Bashful, Slightly/Cubby [platonic], Calypso/Barbossa, Sam Flynn/Quorra, Queen of Hearts/Agrabah Merchant, (BatB) Wardrobe/Gibbs, Emperor/Sleepy [his cuddle-cubine, if you will], Grand Duke/Sneezy, Mike/Sulley, Woody/Buzz, Honey Lemon/Go Go, Wasabi/Fred, Baymax/Tron/Baymax, & Phil/Zeus

Assorted Notes:

- should probably mention that all the worlds are just vaguely All Connected Now

- ven and hercules dated in bbs (then the Plot happened, ven pretty much vanished, and eventually herc moved on. they’re a bit awkward with each other now, but they agreed it’d be too weird to even attempt to date now, bc herc outgrew ven while he was in a magic coma)

- zack’s alive bc they forced hades to resurrect him like he did with auron (my hc is that the deal he made with cloud in kh1 was to bring zack back to life, but hades reneged on this; when cloud finally shared this info with sora, a Quest was undertaken to get hades to honor the deal)

- repliku’s name in this verse is Kiru (he decided to go along with the Theme, minus the sigil); sora’s mom is named Hikari; and i’m going with henry and florian for the real names of prince charming and snow’s prince, respectively (marluxia will probably still call henry “charming” as a sort of affectionate and kind of joking nickname (bc in this verse, henry is the definition of a Disaster Gay))

- goofy and pete dated in the past, but broke up with goofy came out as aroace; pete’s still kinda bitter about it

- aqua/larxene/yuffie is 100% a thing bc i feel that aqua deserves to be able to have fun and not be the responsible mom friend for once; aqua and cinderella also have some playful flirting, but it’s never really serious

- terra’s getting a staycation with his girlfriend, and aqua’s getting a vacation with her girlfriends

- olette/xion/namine/sora/riku is Peak indulgence for me; i love namixiolette, sonami, and soriku too much to want to choose between them? fuck it, they’re all smushed together in a poly pile now. this is my indulgence fic, i can do what i want, and none of you can stop me XP (the other sub-ship combos, riku with any of the girls, and sora with the other two girls, are more queerplatonic, ftr)

- there’s like a whole soap opera behind mickey/minnie/daisy/donald/goofy coming to their current arrangement, mostly bc the idea of giving all the Drama to these characters in particular amuses me; same with past goofy/pete

- a recurring Theme in this verse is that compulsory heterosexuality is the true darkness, and pretty much no one is straight (and so, light = gay) (this is how the final confrontation in kh3 truly went down: sora: kingdom hearts, is gay! / xehanort: shit...u right, bro. kk, lemme just fade into the light of gay with my bf then)

- sephiroth in this verse is mostly just a vehicle for me to be able to mildly punish terrible lightside mentors, so this ship with the MoM is kinda a cracky spite ship (before kh3 went all in on xehaqus, this was eraqus’s original fate XD)

- i will admit, gula/brain is mostly just me going, “you both really annoy me, and i don’t care to find you better ships, so you two can deserve each other”; to be fair to myself, this attitude was on the rarer side during this process

- hiro totally builds a robot body for tron to use to visit the outside world, tho he still chooses to live in the computer most of the time; tron’s besties with baymax 1 & 2

- i’ll be honest: scrooge, huey, dewey, louie, chip, dale, and possibly jiminy, by my rules, should have been put into ships. they’re not bc i couldn’t find any that worked for me *shrugs*

- phil is more like zeus’s on and off again boyfriend; he’s really fucking annoyed that he keeps having to train a lot of zeus’s offspring, and that he kinda, in a way, ends up doing more parenting for them than zeus does; currently phil is kinda claiming herc away from zeus (”i’m his dad now, so there”) (so at this point, their relationship is more of a hatemance than anything else) (i guess in my hc, zeus skews more towards being like his myth self than the disney version)

- the total number of ships, if you’re curious, is 75

- i’ve actually got queer headcanons for the square characters (excluding the khux squad), and some of the disney characters, figured out (as an example, namine is a demiromantic asexual)

okay, i think i’ll stop here for now, tho of course i might tweak or add things later XD

7 notes · View notes