#well i guess i killed the formatting somehow but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[cavaliant]

10 for everyone for Max Positivity

10. What do you love about your muse?

Wow you’re really out here wilding with the meme asks again LMAO.

There’s a couple charas on here that I don’t know if I’d say I LOVE love but I do like all of them and tried to think about the thing that draws me to them the most.

Asaello: Brusque with a soft centre might be done to death but I still love it

Balthus: :/ he’s big, he’s dumb, he cares a lot for his friends and family. Gotta love those boisterous bruisers who are cocky yet super sincere about caring for and supporting their loved ones

Beowolf: The conflict between the careless (both as in rash and as in lacking care about things) mercenary he presents himself as and the more sentimental side he can show despite that. How he really just does not give a shit about some things but really, actually does give a shit about others. You already know this but playful flirty joker with hidden depths (who cares more than they let on, who can be surprisingly serious sometimes) is my absolute fave 😔

Diarmuid: He’s very...normal and placid compared to the rest of his family lmfao. A child’s longing for family and pressure to live up to them is something common to characters in Jugdral but I still like exploring it with him in particular ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ He’s one of the most stable and mature of the children imo so while that can make him flat I also like to think about how much of it is purposeful and how much is instinctive. How did the circumstances he grew up in shape his personality/demeanour today?

Fergus: Another playful misfit who cares more than he lets on :/ ready to throw down to the death but also ready to listen and protect. The whole secret holy royal bastard in hiding but living on the wild side while still ostensibly in hiding is pretty fun. This goes for most Thracia charas but there’s a lot of room to just make shit up to fill in the gaps in their stories and Fergus’ life really has the potential for some truly wild theories/times ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Fred: I like that he actually stops with his commander like she’s an equal to evaluate and think for themselves where their morals stand and if they truly want to keep going along with what their country is doing when it goes against those morals. I also like that he was willing to yell at Kempf and storm a fortress alone but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Homer: He doesn’t hit my hidden depths love as hard as the others but :/ sometimes it doesn’t need to be that deep. It’s just fun to fuck around with him lmao.

Jamke: He’s just a guy who’d rather be with trees than people and I respect that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Verdane as a whole interests me bc it really gets fucked over even for Jugdral and :/ Jamke did kinda betray his brothers and country! Even if they were assholes it took him a while to commit to doing it for what he felt was right and I’m sure he felt some regret over their deaths. Also Jamke-Dew-Edain dream team lmao. They’re so funny...

Lachesis: Her growth as a character! She goes from a sheltered, inexperienced princess to a fierce warrior, someone who had to depend on others to fight for her (and hated it) to a master knight who wanted to take everything onto her own shoulders. A baby sister to a mother/mother figure who would move the world for her children but doesn’t always understand that sometimes they just need simpler things than superhuman feats. She’s someone who will bite the head off of someone and then coo endless praise for her loved ones in the same breath. She’s flawed and messy but she loves so deeply and is so fiercely passionate and 😔 I love her. Truly a lionheart.

Machyua: Ok past all the Filipina jokes there’s really not much to say here lmao. She’s a cool big sis with an axe. No secret hidden angst or wild backstory or whatever, she’s just there to support her Magi pals and do good.

Miranda: Child rulers aren’t uncommon in FE either but :/ I still like to look at the stress of being a ruler forcing her to grow up too fast and act far older than her age. While at the same time still having some childish remnants in her behaviour and desires. I love her fire but it also makes me sad how quickly it’s extinguished.

Oscar: It’s not that deep here either ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I just like older bro figures. And guys who can cook.

Ranulf: He somehow manages to strike a perfect balance between chill and responsible, joking and serious, brave but also cautious. He’s one of Gallia’s highest ranking warriors but he still goes out of his way to cheer up others. He’s one of the most even-keeled characters in the series and I respect him a lot even if idk if I’d call it LOVE TO DEATH.

Reinhardt: I guess I should say something for the og muse of this blog :/// it’s interesting to formulate my own theories about why he became the way he is. What drives someone to fall apart so completely like he does? The contrast and intersections between the composed, fearsome general of Friege, the model older brother, the fawning servant, and the pitiful man who would rather die by his sister’s hand than live for anything any longer are fascinating to me. Not that you would know from my recent posts since I now crack it up more often than not but :/

Shannan: Another big bro figure :/ a sad one. One incident so drastically changed his entire sense of priorities and the person he grew up to be and :c it makes me sad. I’m a sucker for sad tired older bros who try to hide their sad and older chara surrounded by younger ones too.

Sigurd: My love who I absolutely did not expect to become my love owo;; I love his love, passion, naïveté, his innocent desire to help people and do what’s right...and how absolutely dumb and lacking in foresight he is and how he doesn’t escape consequences for it :///

Thor: They’re really just here to mess around in Rein’s body bc I thought it’d be funny :/ and to be weird fluffy dragon gramps

Tibarn: Another one I’m not sure I’d say I ADORE but his interactions on here have been pretty fun. That’s pretty much the case for all the muses like this lmao. I like their character but it’s their relationships/interactions with others that drives me to keep them going. About Tibs specifically though I like that he’s a fearsome warrior and king but is capable of great understanding and gentleness.

Zelgius: Again the contrast between different, contradicting sides--the upstanding general and the cruel executioner, the honourable knight and the selfish groomer, the idea that Black Knight and Zelgius are both one and the same. That no matter the circumstances under which he became Black Knight, he was still the person behind the helmet who committed those deeds. What drives someone to vary so radically in their actions? How can the two sides (which sometimes start to overlap and blur into each other more as time goes on) be fit into a single person? Those are the things I want to explore with him (even though I also end up shitposting a lot with him :/ smh @ me)

#sireneia #words are all we have (replies) #;muses #well i guess i killed the formatting somehow but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #long post

[cynthiashiblog]

The Good, the Bad, and the Goals – My First Year in College

I’ve always heard that college will change you. I’ve never doubted it, but I also never gave it a second thought. Even with all my fussing and “research” into what I simply can’t live without in the dorms (amongst other topics), I believed whatever happens, happens – that’s how these things usually go. Well, so much for surprises.

The Highs

Orientations suck, they always do, but I’m so thankful for mine during my first week in college. Despite getting sucked into playing 20 different versions of “Hi! My name is ____ and my favorite ____ is ____,” I genuinely cherished that week as I acquainted the best friends I could’ve come to know. I had a great roommate, met my best friend who is now my current roommate, and became close with a group of people who I’ve learned I can depend on for anything. I’m surrounded by people I can rely on for late night conversations, last minute homework help, and curbing my spontaneous food cravings. As someone who never used to share much about myself to even my better friends, being closer to people I’ve known for only 12 months than people I’ve known for 12 years was unexpected. So I guess this is a long-winded way of saying I’m extremely thankful for them, and college would really, really suck without them.

Then, there’s my club. This was my first glimpse into the competitive nature of the high-achieving students that I’d be attending school with for the next four (now three) years. I felt uncomfortable with the application process, and even in my second semester I couldn’t muster enough courage to apply to everything I wanted. After applying to 10+ consulting clubs, it was really discouraging to only hear back from one club for which I was actually a promising candidate. Additionally, the level of prestige this club enjoys basically killed all hopes of getting anything on my part. All of that aside, the amount of joy I felt after receiving my acception call made the process worth it. I honestly couldn’t believe the result; somehow, my connection-less bum made it through 3 rounds of interviews without blowing my awkward cover. To make it all better, the friends I’ve made through the club are some of the most talented and welcoming people I know. It is thanks to them that I can attribute most of the things I now know about Berkeley, and I’ll always be infinitely grateful to them for taking me out of my shell more and more.

Finally, there was my new lifestyle. I decided what I wanted to eat and when I wanted to eat it. I handled my own expenses. I chose to sleep in or not sleep at all whenever I saw fit. I went to parties and danced like I had no shame. I can even skip a full week of school and no one would be there to scold me. (Actually, that last part isn’t true... my friends are good influences *sigh.*) I had a lot of fun, and I’m genuinely happy to say that I was never homesick as a result.

I love college. There’s no other word for it. Despite all the struggles and unwanted realizations of self-insufficiency (which I’ll detail next), nothing could drown out the amount of happiness I’ve accumulated since when I first arrived in California.

The Lows

My first semester was hell. Absolute hell. 

It’s not like I didn’t know things would be hard. My West Virginian upbringing didn’t expose me to much, and the education I received before college was average at best compared to the Californian training of other people around me. 

Or at least that’s what I liked to tell others I believed.

In reality, I just couldn’t fathom why I was performing so badly. It seemed like everyone around me was achieving this magical balance between getting A’s, doing 20-hours-a-week clubs, and going out with friends on Friday nights. Taking curved classes only further reinforced this idea as I struggled to achieve the same marks as the people around me. I was suddenly struck with the hard truth that other people were simply better. 

That’s the word I used: better. It took me months to figure out that “better” is not the correct word choice for this situation.

I knew I didn’t want to study chemistry anymore from week 3. I started skipping every class from week 4. Even then, I somehow found a way to be extremely sleep deprived, had no time to make plans with friends, and only went to mandatory outings for my club.

And that’s how I learned the long hinted fact that I fucking suck at time management.

Honestly, I don’t know what finally got to me – how often the mixture of existential crisis and imposter syndrome hit me, or my best friend literally knocking me on the head saying “you REALLY lack discipline.” It felt like all of my high school insecurities that I worked so hard to hide started spilling out of me uncontrollably, and all I could do was use my four limbs to cover the mess that was my first semester. My limbs and the sheer will to not sleep until shit gets done (yet still getting distracted by the poison that is YouTube).

That’s the thing – I wish I could say I fixed myself… but I definitely didn’t.

Goals

I was inspired to start a blog because of a few reasons:

The fact that my writing began to edge closer towards the style of a seventh grader instead of where it should be started to concern me.

I read my friend’s blog entries from when he was in high school, and little things like that inspire me.

A girl in my club has only one blog post in her entire blog. It’s in a format similar to this, where she reflects on one of the worst years of her life. This entry impressed so many people that it might’ve been one of the reasons why she was heavily considered for the club in the first place. @M if you’re reading this, I might’ve totally stalked your resume to get there, but I regret nothing. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’ve always wanted to maintain an online reflection of sorts. Why not put it all in a blog then?

In M’s blog post, she mentioned a few goals she had for the year ahead. It was like a tracker to make sure she doesn’t fuck up in the next year. Here’s my attempt to do the same.

Goals for the 2019-20 Academic Year:

Attend more than half of my classes – I think I was borderline last semester, but I don’t really know. I’d like to be sure this semester.

Invest more and make better financial decisions – stick to budgets, spend less “just for fun” money, but pay for quality

Do work at least a day before the due date – I can already tell this will be a struggle. Procrastination is my enemy, and I inevitably always lose the battle.

Learn to say “no” – I’m not capable of handling 10 things at the same time no matter how often I tell myself I am

Give less shits – NOBODY cares as much as I do about the random shits that I care about, and that’s not because they’re careless

Future me will probably feel attacked reading these, but present me feels pretty good about what I just wrote, and that’s enough.

Growing up, I’ve always looked forward to college. Now that I’m finally here, it would be a tragedy if I didn’t make the most of it. Maybe if I set goals to work towards, I’ll finally allow myself to relish in the beautiful sunshine and neverending energy of California.

#self reflection

[epochryphal]

OKAY TIME TO LIVEBLOG SPACE PATROL LULUCO - IN ITS ENTIRETY

season 1

;;;;u;;;; i love this pacing n humor n tone fuck me

also i remember now how Fucking hype i was for prettyboy and midori mmmmmm also p sure there’s a life fiber reveal and i’m Eager

YOU’RE UNDER ARREST!  YOU’RE FREE TO GO!  god i’d seen that but it’s so good in-context too

Space Cheating

Justice

a-Wake! Judg-ment, gun MOR-phing!

Sorry To Interrupt Your Pointless Discussion, But *I’m* Here

FUCK is midori’s voice nonon’s va because holy shit i did not see that coming somehow and i’m extra starry eyes

(it can get you a boy, or a boyfriend, or an ex-boyfriend)

“whups, i got captured, oh darn”

“so i should stay normal?” “no, stay wonderful” oh my goddd linesss

“i’ll learn my lessonnnn. kayy, lesson learnnnned”

“give it a rest or i’ll kill ya!” “very well, you’re hired”

- - -

season 2

[...loses track of seasons]

wait shit the flame captain is ira FUCKING GOOD

IT SHOULD TRIGGER THE WILL OF JUSTICE OR SOMETHING

oh my God that’s how orange mom shows up i love her

Frick okay i went to actually look up the seiyuus and - luluco is papika, that’s, Good, fuck. also she was anzu in the gantz: o movie? NONON’S SEIYUU WAS SCARLET CLAW OF COURSE SHE WAS AAAAAAAAAA typecasting WAIT SHE WAS HARUKA IN FLCL TOO?? o_o. that, i did not expect

the fucking “clapping”, and also how he just, movetilts with the whole desk

JUSTICE IS OVER

THOSE ARE LIFE FIBERS IN HER CAPE FOR SURE MMMMM

“yes my ma’am” pfff

snrrrk. shoplift/resell theme

IS IT STILL IN THE BOX

Waves Of Justice Are Still Running Through His Brain

space yen

A CRIME FOR A CRIME EQUALS JUSTICE! THIS IS HOW! WE ADULTS! CARRY OUT JUSTIIIIIIICE

perishable

Mmmmmmmm Cocoon Sphere

dpfjg I Think I’ve Been Here Once Before

KLK-X

3.5 star review means it’s basically the real thing-

MmmmmmmmmmMMMM COVERS BOY Good Good Evil Talk - ldbtngfj pffdt Kill-***-Killian the verbal censoring i’m fhfgh

FUTATSU. II KOTO O -

shitty background nova while OuO life fiber nova peeks into main view is G o o d

some kind of space fraud

THE MYSIC ARUGHDHFH LIGHT IT ON FIRE the garbage letters THE SELF DRAMA THE LOSE YOUR WAY TE GUTS FNFVJGNJF WHAAATTTTT IT CAN STILL BURN HOTTERRR i’m still not dead yettt. wow. wow

i can’t believe literally no one tried to light the original life fiber / ragyo on fire, in retrospect, holy shit?? aikuro with your lighter what were you DOING

magic planet lwa at 3.7 i... trigger i love that you’ve done this

firewood of justice

30,000 lightyears in prison

sucy............ “you gun goblin” [stuffs luluco full of mushrooms] Fuck the very good constant updating how much time left

djhgn the counting and the lil goblin

and the music stops

pffffffffffff wipe, wipe, wipe... dochi demo ii kedo ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

what... is up with Violence and se’chan. full-color girl... and the backwards “people have different sets of values”... [ah, i hadn’t heard of sex and violence with machspeed]

kyuuuuuu

the lil everyone doing the hand pose for the picture........ i deeply need cosplayers doing that

ohh my god blackholeian. also his voice is so familiar

BLACK HOLES BECAME BLACK HOLES BY SHOPLIFTING

stupid middleschooler who eats nothing but sweet bread

DINOSAURS WERE SHOPLIFTED

2000 glasses.......

the good static fave

Special Flat First Love

zero void mmmm

Nothingling

the pinnacle of worthlessness - ZA! NOSSINGU!

GOD there’s the badbad alphaomega joke

heh... evil as incomprehensible, in this one, rather than klk’s incomprehensible, is interesting juxtaposition

mmmm the theme without luluco in it is good

pfff. what a good joke, that inferno cop would look like chief over justice - oh my god senpai

ooo “justice will never die?” “normally, no”

Hell Ain’t Big Enough For Two Agents Of Justice

aaaa god i’m such a sucker for their fucking theme messages? oh wow another plotline about “normal is something you decide for yourself” “truly precious things will never disappear, especially if they’re intangible”

Arrest Him

a middle schooler in love for the first time is Invincible,

ojii-san... he’s only 21...

He Shoplifted My Most Prized Possession

fuckifnfjf justice chant

YATTA!! JUSTICE IS A MIRACLE!!!!

god the very cute tsuzuku/continued incorporation of format, is good

If You Ask Me, Only After One Dies And Comes Back To Life Do They Become Normal

fucking, the good gurren lagann prow shit

oh my god the fucking unending hearts and the hair blowing and the i’m only a middleschooler idk about the void

emotion big bang.....

oh my god normal

PRETTY TRANSFORM god those sherbert colors what good animation bullshit

fucking covers voidmonster

mmm the themes of loveydovey first loves, i see u in darlifran

Love Is Justice

fucking- microblackhole activated by big bang

You Finally Pulled The Trigger -

ahdnfhjjnffnf People Die When They Are Shot - I’ll Teach You That Normal Fact Of Life Right Now!!

gosh she’s cute without her hairclip

in the end you’re only taking pleasure in shoplifting!!

oh my god

okay i didn’t check if blackhole headman (ahem... doc scratch) was voiced by uzu/viral’s seiyuu and i will in a mo but that’s my guess [update: Yep despite it not being listed on wikipedia at all wtf]

Arrest Him Again. you’re supposed to introduce your boyfriend to your dad - Normally

aww the highfive...

JusssTiiiice

Trigger-chan

outfit...

that was sweet, and absolutely not the sort of thing i could have watched serially heh. it’s nice to feel in on the jokes

awwww the highfive

...so... crossover art with nonon/midori ira/chief and uzu/blackholeian outfit swaps totally exists right. right. blease. also villain uzu is something i never knew i needed? also the casts interacting is precious art ideas - nonon on chief over justice’s shoulder for step one

#luluco bloggin #anime bloggin