#they've been hounding her ever since nik and price started dating graves | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cod-dump · 11 months

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Everytime Graves goes to Price or Nik to complain about Soap being mean to him. Soap reminds them the "HE SHOT AH FCKING TANK AT ME!!??"

If that doesn't work he goes to, or Ghost who will then follow Graves around while glaring at him a whole day.

Or Laswell who then spoils him, and Gaz, while telling Price and Nik that she can't believe they're treating the sergeants like that, after everything they've gone through. Laswell is extremely disappointed. This will make both of the men feel upset, because no one wants Laswell to be disappointed in them.

Selfish

Graves centric, PriceGravesNik

TW: angst

(my friend called me an emotional masochist for this lol)

___

It felt like everyone was against him. He couldn't blame them with the shit he pulled, but Graves felt like he earned a tiny bit of leeway by this point. Hasn't he proven himself to the others by now? Nik and Price keep telling him they're proud about how much he's changed but judging by how everyone else treats him... he doesn't feel like he's changed at all.

Soap was always fucking him over, getting Nik and Price to turn their backs to Graves (normally only for a few seconds but it still hurt). If Soap didn't succeed in getting Nik and Price on his side, he turned to Ghost. And Ghost never passed up on a opportunity to fuck over Graves. He never physically hurt him, but that man was a master in verbal abuse and had a glare that could kill a god.

It didn't take much for Gaz to get on the Graves hate train and it happened very suddenly. Graves had three against him and felt like he couldn't turn to Nik or Price about it. He was afraid if he said anything that they would realize that everyone was right. That Graves wasn't worth it, that they could do so much better, that him trying to change was laughable and he will never be more than what Shepherd had him do.

He will always be that person, no matter what. It was only a matter of time until they realized it. Graves could hear the clock ticking, there was a constant countdown in his head. Every time Soap said something to them, every time Ghost said something to Graves and berated him, every time Gaz went along with whatever was being said about Graves--

It felt like the countdown sped up, like it would drastically jump to lower numbers.

Graves felt on edge the entire time. Felt like everyone was looking at him, waiting. It was too much. It made his head spin, his heart race, made him lose his breath. Graves kept thinking about what Shepherd told him, that he was nothing more than a walking plague, infecting those around them all while wearing a grin.

He hadn't spoken or seen Shepherd in a long time now but those words were becoming more prominent in Graves' head. He was starting to think he was right. He was a walking plague and he was infecting Nik and Price because they stood too close to him. He was hurting them. Hurting their relationship with everyone. They were taking a leap of faith with him, trusting him to prove to everyone that he has changed and was trying to do good.

It was only a matter of time before that faith and trust blew up in their faces.

Graves couldn't talk to them about it, to anyone. He didn't need to, he knew already. This was a mess waiting to happen, and Graves wasn't sure if he could handle watching it. He was clinging onto the blindly given love and affection from Nik and Price. Their addictive trust, their warm hugs, sweet kisses--

He was being selfish by sticking around as long as he has.

Graves knew he had to leave after overhearing what Laswell told them. He knew Nik and Price cared about her and valued her opinion. They were very close friends, practically family. Graves had always tried to avoid her, he knew she didn't like him and will probably never go beyond tolerating him for Nik and Price's sake.

"You're throwing away your relationship with the boys over him."

Graves heard the venom in her voice, it made him feel sick. He didn't mean to eavesdrop and had stumbled by at the wrong time.

"Kate-"

"No, John. I don't want to hear it. You both have been acting like lovesick teenagers, caring more about a temporary fling than the more important relationships in your lives! Every day I get calls from Soap. Texts from Ghost. Guess what they're both saying?"

Graves leaned heavily on the wall, heart pounding and ache spreading through his chest.

"You're prioritizing a relationship that is going to end in flames. People are going to get hurt and I want you to guess who those people are."

He couldn't stick around. He just started walking. The silence from Nik and Price was loud, suffocating. It said everything that Graves had been telling himself was going to happen: They were finally opening their eyes. The countdown had reached the end and Graves needed to leave. He couldn't bear facing Nik and Price telling him to fuck off, it hurt to think about it. But he knew that they were done with him. After that talk from Laswell? Keeping him around afterwards would be stupid.

Graves could feel everyone's eyes on him. It was too much. He couldn't look up, he didn't want to meet anyone's gaze. He just focused on the floor and walked, trying to keep the ache in his chest from being too much. But that was hard when everything was too much. People talking, their gazes, their very presence made him feel on edge, under attack. Graves needed to leave, needed to disappear.

Graves accidentally ran into someone.

"Fuck- Graves?"

He wanted to scream at Gaz's voice. He couldn't look at him as it became harder to breathe.

"Phillip?"

He bolted. Ran as fast as he could. He couldn't find a door, an exit into the outside world. He found a window instead and climbed out it. He took off after hitting the ground, not caring anymore. He had to leave. Had to run before Nik and Price found him and got rid of him in a more forceful manner. Graves just ran, managing to get off base. He was surprised how far and long he managed to run with how fucked up his lungs were after the tank accident. No, not accident. Soap tried to kill him but failed. Graves was wishing he didn't fail.

Finally, he couldn't run anymore. He collapsed to the ground, breathing hard. His lungs were screaming and he felt even more panicked by his inability to catch his breath. Graves was told to not push himself too hard, that his lungs couldn't handle it anymore. Nik and Price usually watched him, kept an eye on him and made sure he didn't overwork himself. Well, no one was here looking out for him and now he was on the ground, wheezing with black edging into his vision.

He was kneeling on the ground, trying to breathe. He felt himself tip and fall onto his side, staring ahead of him. Sound became muffled, everything started to slow down. He heard something attempt to push against the barrier. He felt someone grab him but he couldn't understand what was being said. He couldn't see, couldn't hear, couldn't breathe--

Graves felt himself drift in and out of consciousness, unable to focus on anything, not even a thought. He felt himself be moved, a pressure going up and down his back. Graves felt air slip into his lungs, little by little. After some time he could feel himself breathe better, hear better. He had his eyes shut because the sun was too much. He didn't know where he was or who was with him, but they were trying to keep him alive.

"-to be okay. Breath in... and out..."

Graves slowly followed their instructions, still unable to determine who it was. It couldn't be anyone that knew him, they would've left him to die. Graves felt himself tilt and the person leans against him, a hand going up and down his back, matching his breathing. Sound was returning and Graves could hear the person, a man, speaking calmly in his ear. Though there was a panic behind the calmness, his voice was soothing.

The sound of a vehicle pulling up, rushing footsteps--

"Fuck, what happened to him?"

Soap.

Graves feels panic wash over him again, trying to move away. The man holds him, cursing before he tries to get Graves to stand.

"We have to get him to medical!"

Graves was hauled into the vehicle, the person who saved him holding him while Soap drove (he assumes Soap was driving, unless there was a third, silent, person there at the wheel). Graves felt exhaustion hit him like a truck and he just leans heavily on the man holding him upright. Graves couldn't bother to react to the voices that were maybe talking to him. Didn't react when some grabbed him, held his face. He felt himself get picked up and get carried somewhere. And that's when he finally lost consciousness.

And while he was having difficulty holding onto a coherent thought, he did manage to have one thought that he could actually understand.

I hope I don't wake up.

And just like that, everything stopped being too much.

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