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lorei-writes · 3 years

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Match-Up #29

Hello, @spoopy-fish-writes ! You chose left, so your match-up goes first, ha! Nobody expected a match-up like so, it’s... Like a Spanish Inquisition meme?

[Lorei from the future: This had some plot twists, huh].

Whew, where do I even begin!

Being a quick learner and overall, adapting to new situations well would be especially appreciated by more so lively and adventurous warlords, I suppose. Their partner would, in my opinion, downright need to have this quality, for the safety of the both of them... Or well, it would at the very least be preferable. Oh, yes, let’s not forget about warlords who have kidnapped their lover at least once. You know, it happens.

Nobunaga (+1) Mitsuhide (+1) Masamune (+1) Kenshin (+1) Shingen (+1)

Smart, ha! A treat for those who do enjoy a nice chat. I think it would be especially appreciated by warlords who enjoy to be intellectually stimulated more so than others.

Nobunaga (+1) Mitsuhide (+1) Mitsunari (+1) Masamune (+1) Shingen (+1)

Confident in your abilities, but not so much in yourself? Hmm... I suppose it is a good tool against over-confidence, something that could be well-prised by warlords living more so on the edge of things, always needing to make sure their next move won’t bring doom upon them. I think it could be taken as a sign of being reasonable? Some also could understand it quite well, hmm...

Mitsuhide (+1) Hideyoshi (+1) Mitsunari (+1) Shingen (+1)

Let’s consider the last two points together - being good at keeping your emotions in check and being loyal, trustworthy. The first one would be most likely equally appreciated by all, but in combination with the latter... I think it could have a particularly soothing effect? Hmm... I’d look towards those who were betrayed once and struggle to trust again. I reckon they’d truly see the worth of such a quality. Perhaps also those who need to know they can fully believe somebody?

Nobunaga (+1) Mitsuhide (+1) Hideyoshi (+1) Ieyasu (+1) Masamune (+1) Kenshin (+1) Shingen (+1)

Oh, okay, a purge shall begin. Let’s start with can’t take care of yourself (please, drink some water before reading the remaining parts of the match-up) + little sense of self preservation.

Mitsuhide (+4) <- he can’t do that either. Too similar. Mitsunari (+2) <- he needs somebody to help him with the very same issue, so although he isn’t doing this willingly (...unlike Mitsuhide, since there is quite a difference in their approach...), it’s a no-no

In contrast to that, there are certain suitors who do remind their lover to take better care of themselves.

Hideyoshi (+1) Masamune (+1) Kenshin (+1)

Lacking empathy at times and struggling to connect... Well, I could see it as quite a problematic thing when dealing with tsundere-type characters. If there is some conflict, it generally can be resolved if at least one part has some insight on feelings. (Which, by the way, will set Kenshin and Nobunaga here - Kenshin drowns in his own feelings. Nobunaga? He is completely detached).

Nobunaga (-1) Ieyasu (-1) Yukimura (-1)

You... You put being impulsive in the flaws category, so I suppose you would not want for that to be amplified. Well, we all know what warlord I will need to boink over his head for doing just that, now, don’t we? Hmm... Perhaps warlords who could serve as a bit of safety brake could be a good choice?

Hideyoshi (+1) Masamune (-1) Kenshin (+1) Shingen (+1)

Holding grudges, being petty... Hmm... I think that perhaps a certain overzealous mother hen could trigger that quality. Perhaps a certain deceitful “I will lie to you” person too.

Hideyoshi (-1) Shingen (-1)

1st Summary:

Shingen (+4) Kenshin (+4) Hideyoshi (+3) Masamune (+3) Nobunaga (+2)

Points distributed for likes:

Nobunaga (+1) <- (+2) music, baking; (-1) animals (the hunting scene in his route) Ieyasu (+1) <- animals (all of them have some, but he did treat Wasabi) Masamune (+2) <- art, baking Shingen (+1) <- baking

Points distributed for dislikes:

Nobunaga (-1) <- he loves sugar, there may be a bit of around (technically you can pick stuff separately, but sometimes you may have to compromise and that’s not his strong side) Hideyoshi (-1) <- deadlines Ieyasu (+1) <- dislike for anything annoying (repetitive noises included) Shingen (-1) <- overly sweet food

2nd Summary:

Masamune (+5) Shingen (+4) Kenshin (+4) Hideyoshi (+2) Ieyasu (+2) Nobunaga (+2)

Only characters with positive value by their names will be considered in the final stages of the match-up.

Hideyoshi (+2) - he has a habit of micro-managing others to a degree, so he may feel restrictive Kenshin (+4) - he is controlling at first. Surely, it changes later on in the route, but this being the dealbreaker... It would most likely prevent the relationship from ever starting. Nobunaga (+2) - he isn’t exactly keen on waiting at the beginning

Ieyasu (-1) <- he sometimes tells others not to do something and may appear patronising

Being unable to blush sounds quite lovely, honestly, although the underlying issue is not so nice. Let’s unite in the weird blood flow club, my blood pressure is sometimes so low the thing used to measuring it can’t detect it, haha. Maybe it’s a bit old too.

No points were distributed for wild cards.

Ahh, luckily, Nobunaga didn’t make it this far, haha.

Yes, yes! And now, the verdict time is upon you...

Final Ranking

Masamune (+5) Shingen (+4) Ieyasu (+1)

Masamune

Confessed first: Masamune. That being said, you were the one to explain to him how you define and perceive love, and it did take him a moment to wrap his head around the concept and understand it. Only then did he confess.

Makes tea in the morning: Masamune, unless he has just returned to the estate and, well, isn’t exactly in the shape to do that.

Hogs blankets at night: You. He’s like an oven, he won’t complain about this too much - but he will use it as a blackmail material later on and tease you lots.

Is the little spoon: Depends on how harsh the day was on each of you.

Possible points for conflict: Well, both of you have your own issues, neither being capable of taking good care of yourself. It may happen sometimes that, each equally exhausted, you will argue over who needs to rest. Other than that... He is not the most fluent in regards to his feelings, but he does get a grasp on them a little sooner than you. He is learning to slow down and accomodate for you better, but he does slip sometimes, even if just sometimes.

Free time ideas: Cooking lessons (+ baking together), playing with Shogetsu, re-organising the display of your art, going on a stroll, without any sense of direction, and just enjoying life.

Favourite date spot: Any place, as long as you can destress for a moment. He’s particularly found of locations when he can let his guard down for a moment.

A secret you share: He’s actually a worse baker than you and you’ve scolded him quite a lot when you first entered the kitchen together. Usually, he wouldn’t mind, but this experience... It did humble him a lot, his face having bloomed in a fashionable shade of tomato-red.

His favourite thing about you: Just one? He couldn’t pick even if he wanted. It’s just that... This “favourite” thing is everything, because of how it all comes together. He loves how reasonable you can stay, but also how this reason stops where trust and loyalty begins. He loves seeing your art, how passionate and knowledgeable you are - it is as if... There was always something to surprise him? Ah, and let’s not forget to your inability to blush - it is quite amusing when you’re so cutely embarrassed and yet, don’t look so at all. If he ever managed to get your face to heat up, he will take it as a point of pride.

His message to you: “You always amaze me, lass. Loyalty for loyalty, what do you say? I promise never to betray you or your trust... And not to limit you nor your desires.” “Huh? What do you mean why? Because you’re the most beautiful when you are yourself, of course.”

#match-up #ikesen match-up #ikemen sengoku match-up #ikesen #ikemen sengoku

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glorykill-a · 3 years

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How quick is your character to suspect someone else? Does this change if they are close with that person?

in essence , it depends on who and what the person is , and how much they mean to him overall. doom is not a trusting person to begin with , his countless years in hell have worn away at his ability to fully put his life in someone else’s hands ( with the exception of the master chief , alex mercer , samus aran , and other people that are important to him ) so he does a lot of things on his own due to this distrust , as well as believing that no one else is capable of what he has to do. one of the people that has aided in his inability to fully trust someone else has to be samur maykr aka samuel hayden , an angel that manipulated him into stepping inside the divinity machine and stripping him of his humanity to give him divine power.

it was the most painful experience he has ever felt , he saw things that no human was ever meant to , how the universe was created and how it could possibly fall while being torn apart and put back together atom by atom.

i wouldn’t say he ever fully trusted samur but he was an angel , and he was taught to give them respect as he was growing up , that they could give wisdom and prosperity... but samur’s manipulation of him , taking away the last thing he was clinging to from his old life , it’s severed his ability to trust others at first glance , to fully have faith from the get-go. however , like i said earlier , it really depends on if this person is nonhuman or human. orion tends to trust humans as a whole , he trusts in their ability to endure and improve , to learn from the mistakes they’ve made if given the chance... though he doesn’t trust a human as an individual. unless he knows them very well , he has a tendency to keep an eye on them in perilous situations because he knows some people cannot handle the stress of demonic events , that they’re liable to snap and harm others if it comes down to it. he’s immediately suspicious of a person on their own , he loves humans , but he’s not ignorant to their innate tendencies and he knows that they’re also prone to being possessed. he would only to start to trust someone and show less suspicion if they consistently prove that they’re capable of handling themselves and that they can keep calm during highly strenuous events.

there’s always this thought at the back of his mind that there could be ulterior motives to their actions , he doesn’t make his suspicion obvious , he takes the time to observe and give them a false sense of security. if they don’t show him any reason to doubt them further , he’ll be prone to trusting them more. however , if they confirm his suspicions , he will have no problem with confronting them.

when it comes to nonhumans , it’s slightly different. doom views them in a similar fashion to humans , giving them the benefit of the doubt but not fully trusting them initially... but his relationship with nonhumans is complicated. although he does have a lot of faith and love for humans , he is alienated from them due to their constant worshipping and dehumanizing of him , as well as people being terrified of him and his power - causing orion to view humans as almost separate from him despite his origins as a human. in contrast , something nonhuman can understand the feelings he has towards humans , and it’s this empathy that makes him more prone to developing a kinship with them , thus having a buildup of rapid trust , but the same logic of being initially suspicious can also be applied to nonhumans. it’s an entirely different story for angelic or demonic entities ( and even half breeds ) because he will never waver his suspicions of them no matter how much he seems to trust them ( which is a challenge in and of itself because he despises angels , and demons are his sworn enemy ).

now , if doom completely and utterly trusts someone with every fiber of his being , his suspicions are next to none , because they have proven to him that they would never double cross or harm him in any capacity. his relationship with master chief can be used as an example , with an unwavering and undying trust in the man he loves , believing that he could do no wrong... it’s blinding , in a way. orion has put all his faith in someone if they have his trust , meaning that he can never suspect them , his emotions can cloud his judgement. even if someone were to approach him with possible evidence that someone he loves could be doing something completely wrong , he’d vehemently deny it in favor of siding with the person he cares for... but if the suspicions were correct and they misused / betrayed his trust , then he would never fully trust them again. it takes a lot to build up trust with doom , and though it’s not easy to lose it , it can never be fully reestablished if it’s broken.

: / / character development questions ( accepting ) : @crimenight

#crimenight #this is so long for no reason LMAO #BUT YEAH basically doom is suspicious of everyone right off the bat - but the suspicion level tends to vary #like he's more willing to set them aside for nonhumans than people (which is surprising but that's bc people alienated him)#and he knows how people are - but if you fully gain his trust then it takes a lot to break it #but if it is broken then he probably won't ever trust you again or even consider you to be a friend #he's harsh but there's a reason #◬ : / / codex entry 07. metas & headcanons.#answered.

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 6 years

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For the ask meme: A) 1, 3, 6, 9, 11, 23, B) 2, 11, C) 5, 7, D) 5, E) 1, F) 3, G) 5, H) 1, L) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

This is going to be a thicccccc post y’all. Doing these for Reeve, Lonan, Foster, Harrison, and Darren from FOSTERED, and Clifford from I’M DISAPPOINTED!

PART A:

1. What of the Meyers-Briggs personality types they most fit into? INFP, ENFT, et cetera…

Reeve: ISFP

Lonan: ISTJ

Foster: INFJ

Harrison: ENFP

Darren: Not sure about this one, probably whatever my mom is (which I believe is ISFJ)

Clifford: INFP

3. Do they have any emotional or psychological conditions? Are they aware of it? Do they try to treat it?

Reeve:

She has struggled with clinical depression since book two to present times.

She developed PTSD also pretty early on in the series, though it definitely worsened in book four, and is probably at its peak where I’m at in book six.

I also believe she does struggle with borderline personality disorder, though this is a newer discovery, and I’ve definitely been doing a lot of research recently in order to write it respectfully (as I’ve done with the previous disorders).

Reeve is aware of her depression and PTSD, not her BPD, but these all remain untreated

Lonan:

He namely suffers from some form depression that fluctuates a bit

He also suffers from depersonalization/derealization disorder

Lonan’s also struggled with an alcohol problem since book three, and a recent drug problem

I don’t think Lonan is aware concretely of suffering from any of these disorders. He emphasizes seeing things to believe them, so while he understands deep down that he does struggle with these things, he would never admit this to himself, or anyone else. Thus, they would most likely remain untreated.

Foster:

Foster also does suffer from depression as well, though I would push it toward high-functioning.

He feels the effects, but doesn’t say anything about them because he doesn’t put his best interest above everyone else’s. In the future, definitely would be down for therapy

Harrison:

Pretty similar to Foster as well in terms of depression. I think it definitely worsens as he ages, and plateaus when he’s in his mid twenties.

This wasn’t ever something I considered before my own diagnosis, and isn’t something I’ve consciously incorporated, but I have a gut feeling Harrison has bipolar disorder as well

Harrison doesn’t do anything about this currently, but in the spinoff, does look into medication

Darren:

Darren is a relatively new character for me, so I haven’t had as much time with him to ruminate on this, but I definitely think his brother’s death influenced a resurfacing of his childhood depression. :(

Clifford:

Clifford does have social anxiety disorder, and a milder, but persistent depression (probably persistent depressive disorder)

He did have treatment in the past for his depression, in connection with his treatment for his alcohol abuse, but doesn’t continue with it beyond counselling in the actual book

6. Does your OC tend to assume their interpretation of events and reality is correct, or do they question it? I.e., “I’m sure that’s what you said” versus “It’s possible I misheard you.”

Reeve

She definitely believes her interpretation of events and reality to be correct (even when grandiose) but depending on her mental state, she can very much doubt what’s real and what isn’t.

Lonan

His interpretation is always right even when he’s wrong.

Foster

“It’s possible I misheard you” be Foster’s catch phrase yo

Harrison

Like Lonan, he’s confident in his interpretation of events/reality, but isn’t arrogant about it lol

Darren

He admits he’s wrong sometimes and makes mistakes, so definitely, he questions his interpretation of things and is always open to improve.

Clifford

Clifford doubts himself SO much??? he be like uhhhummmmbutuhhhhhh

9. Does your OC make a lot of excuses? For themselves? Others?

Reeve:

Yes for herself and for others, doesn’t really own up to anything ever

Lonan:

Yes also, doesn’t really own up to anything ever, even more so than Reeve

Foster:

Yes for others, but not for himself. If he’s being mistreated, he oftentimes will try to excuse the other party’s behaviour, but will stand up for himself after a while (tho he’s a hella pushover)

Harrison:

Harrison doesn’t make excuses from himself, or for anybody else, excluding Lonan, lol. Because of his emotional investment, he’ll often try to come up with a reason to excuse Lonan’s (usually very horrible) actions when it comes to the intimacy of their relationship. Tho he stops taking BS really quickly, lol, but Lonan can sometimes be a soft spot (which ain’t cool asshole).

Darren:

Darren is such a good person, lol, he doesn’t excuse himself for his actions, or anyone else’s actions, with Reeve’s being an exception. Pretty similar to Lonan x Harrison.

Clifford:

Clifford does the opposite of excuse his actions. He’s an extreme self-loather, honestly. He also excuses other people’s actions because he’s a pushover like Foster.

11. Does your OC put others’ needs before their own?

Reeve:

No, though this is detrimental at times, because she can lack a lot of empathy at times, in the past I would’ve said yes

Lonan:

No, also is a lil selfish not gonna lie

Foster:

Yes, too much

Harrison:

Also yes too much

Darren:

Extreme yes very too much

Clifford:

Hella yikers way too much

23. Does your OC place much importance on their appearance? Do they feel confident in it?

Reeve:

No, but also isn’t confident, or insecure about it

Lonan:

To an extent. He doesn’t want to be the garbage aesthetic (which is my aesthetic and I love but ok) so does iron the living fuck out of his button ups, lol. Is very confident @ the arrogance thooooo

Foster:

Yes, just because he’s suave™. He might be a lil insecure because he’s v sensitive tho lol #chillitwiththeaxe

Harrison:

Yes, because he’s also the suavest. Harrison is actually the garbage/dumpster/garage aesthetic, and I love it. He doesn’t put an extraneous amount of effort into his appearance tho, is just a natural boi. He’s also confident but not arrogant (most of the times lol).

Darren:

A rather normal amount, probably? Isn’t too concerned tho, is confident with who he is as a person

Clifford:

Yes. Very much yes. He’s pretty insecure, and while this doesn’t link back with his appearance, he definitely is conscious of it, and makes sure it doesn’t further add to his accumulated insecurities.

PART B:

2. Do they get frustrated when lines at places like pharmacies, check-outs, delis, banks, et cetera, are moving slowly?

Reeve:

Yes, the impatience is real the world works for her yo

Lonan:

Also yes, the world is his bitch hunty, the world ain’t only his oyster, it’s his possession my dude why are we still waiting in this line Harrison it’s been thirty seconds oh my gOd

Foster:

No, lol, patience is a virtue yo

Harrison:

Yes, but not because he’s entitled like Reeve and Lonan, but because he’s pretty impatient and antsy and doesn’t enjoy sitting still

Darren:

No, lol he’s just gonna play candy crush on his phone and be satisfied lol

Clifford:

Yes, after some time. Like, he’ll see a long line and be like *impending doom* but won’t start complaining until like fifteen minutes in

11. Your OC is running late to meeting someone: Do they let the other person know? Do they lie about why they’re late?

Reeve:

She lets the other person know and will bend the truth so it works in her favour. So ‘I rear-ended someone’ would become ‘someone rear-ended me’.

Lonan:

Lets them know he’s running late and lies about why he’s late to also benefit him. So if he slept in, he’s like ‘My sister had me drive her to an appointment and gave me absolutely no notice, and I’m appalled at her inability to recognize consequences for actions and the importance of respecting time’.

Foster:

Tells the other person he’s running late and is honest about why he’s late, and profusely apologizes.

Harrison:

Lets them know he’s running late and lies but creatively. So I’m running late because I’m hungover is I’m running late because my alarm system literally had a freak out last night and literally every cop in America showed up at my house and turns out one of them is my mother’s cousin’s ex, so we had a long conversation and then I had to fill out paperwork and pay a fine and my morning has been awful? Sounds unbelievable, but he’ll somehow convince you. Or at least you’ll know he’s lying but the charm tho?

Darren:

Says he’s running late and tells the truth about why he’s late, is like sorry buddy tbh I wanted to binge Hell’s Kitchen instead of coming to this corporate meeting and yikers the time slipped away.

Clifford:

Says he’s running late and tries to lie but it’s so pathetic the person he has plans with cancels

PART C:

5. Do your OC’s morals and rules of common decency go out the window when it comes to those they don’t like, or when it’s inconvenient? Aka, are their morals situational?

Reeve:

Her morals are ridiculously situational oml

Lonan:

What morals

Foster:

No, lol, his morals are goddamn iron my bro

Harrison:

I mean if he really wants to spitball that one person who wronged him he ain’t gonna say no ??? Though I mean, Lonan has done a lot of awful shit to him, and he still hasn’t gotten revenge, so I guess he’s not a situational kind of mans.

Darren:

Nopers, he likes his morals to stay where they are

Clifford:

Morals also ain’t moving yo

7. Do they believe people change over time? If so, is it a natural process or does it take effort?

Reeve:

No, people don’t change

Lonan:

People never change

Foster:

People can change, but it does take effort (he used to believe it was a natural process and then Reeve and Lonan happened looool)

Harrison:

Ehh. People don’t really change. They can if they really want to, but they’re just going to be the same person but less shitty?

Darren:

I think he’s a little unsure. He wants to believe people can change, but he’s not sure if they actually will because a lot of people just dont have enough self-awareness and drive/willingness to.

Clifford:

People don’t change mom omg just their circumstances and how they react to them agh

PART D:

5. Do they believe in ghosts? If not, why? If so, do they think they’re magical/tie into their religion, or are they scientifically plausible?

Reeve:

No. When you’re dead, you’re dead.

Lonan:

Also no, when you’re dead, you’re dead anyone who thinks otherwise is a fool

Foster:

Not really? Maybe he’d like to. I don’t think he’s rooted enough in just humanity that he’d believe only what we see exists, but he’s not like a ghost fanatic, lol. When one haunts him tho he’s got that holy water my boi.

Harrison:

Yes, but jokingly. I think he would be a bit of a provoker to ghosts because he thinks the idea is stupid, but does it for the fun. He’s down for ghost hunting apps, but thinks it’s all a joke. Probably is that person who uses a Ouija board and opens a portal.

Darren:

Also no because he doesn’t really think about it? He believes in the afterlife, and probably heard tons of stories from his grandma, but isn’t a huge believer himself.

Clifford:

I feel like Clifford would only believe in ghosts when he’s home alone and it’s 4AM and there’s a knock on the door, tbh, he scares easily, lol

(v/ sad about this tho im a hella believer in ghosts, where my ghost believer characters at thooooo)

PART E:

1. Would you say that your OC is intelligent? In what ways? Would your OC agree?

Reeve:

Yeah, I think Reeve is pretty intelligent. She’s able to see the motivations of others and understand them (doesn’t mean she necessarily keeps them in mind with her actions). She’s also pretty good at manipulation because she understands the insecurities and weaknesses of those around her. I dunno if she’d necessarily agree with this, though.

Lonan:

Lonan is v/ intelligent, similarly to Reeve. He is literally the *master of manipulation, knows the motives of others, their weaknesses, and knows exactly how to exploit them to the fullest extent possible. Other than his intelligence being used to ruin the lives of others, lol, he’s also really good with numbers. Highkey actually me self-inserting my love for mental math into my son #noregrets. He would definitely agree with this. He’s smart and he knows it. (Unfortunately) Though for the smartest person in my books, he sure does make the stupidest decisions??

(last week I was shopping with my best friend and calculated a total real quick and she was like “stop being lonan” lol oops)

(lonan is actually an insult now ??)

Foster:

He’s also hella smart, and gets no credit for it? Foster is very much like a teacher, honestly. He’s got that elementary school 10/10 teacher vibe to him. Foster is also really good at math, lol. He’s got an affinity for science outside of my book world, to be honest, loves reading, is down to memorize the periodic table, yo. Foster’s really down to earth so he’d prolly be hella modest about his smarts.

Harrison:

He’s really, really smart, but acts really dumb?? Harrison doesn’t give himself enough credit, to be honest. He doesn’t really focus on his brain, but it’s a sharp one, yo. He would probably disagree with me calling him smart tho.

Darren:

Is like my smartest boy? Darren is very people smart, but he’s also very brain smart, lol. I think he’d be pretty proud about his smarts, and express that, though not arrogantly.

Clifford:

Hates himself so would probably call himself the stupidest shit alive even though he actually isn’t. He just needs some encouragement.

PART F:

3. Could they ever live in a “tiny home”?

Reeve:

No, too claustrophobic for her, would probably burn it down in frustration

Lonan:

No, he would need a five acre extension.

Foster:

Yes! This is so his aesthetic he just wants to live in a tiny house in the woods and never interact with people and be one with nature and make pine needle tea every morning and play Sudoku and write a novel about a young man on his literary adventures in London while sitting in a hammock at golden hour.

Harrison:

No? Maybe he’d find it really fun and a great idea for the first week so he could pretend to be a giant, but I mean, I think he’d hate it after a while. He’d keep bumping into cupboards and drawers and blame it on the size of the house when it’s really actually him.

Darren:

Yuppers, sign him up. Except Darren would be so down for a tiny house built out of an old school bus (like my dream tiny house lolol), and he’d just park up on the beach and have the best life?

Clifford:

I think he would enjoy it for a bit, but I can’t see Clifford sticking it out for very long. :( He likes small spaces as they’re comforting to him but is also claustrophobic? This boy is a walking contradiction tho? (me)

PART G

5. Did they go through any typical phases growing up?

Reeve:

Not really she’s boring lol

Lonan:

Probably a really pathetic emo phase ft. the Haircut before he buzzed off his hair lmaooooo

Foster:

Also so boring, no phases here, probably if I had to choose, the ‘hippie’ phase but it’s not a phase if it’s his life ? He’s like YES with that clay based toothpaste, YES with them green smoothies, #oil pulling? Sign me UPPP.

Harrison:

The swearing phase where every sentence is made of curse words except also not a phase if it’s real doe?? he’s no lie that person who be like: fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckyoufuckfuckfuckfuck

Darren:

He probably had a real quick stint of writing bad poetry except he was never angsty enough so it was always like the sun is up / the sky is blue / it’s beautiful / and so are you and tbh can I get a Darren in my life

(not that those lyrics are bad i quite like them)

Clifford:

Clifford will forever be stuck in his emo phase, that’s who he is, man, he’s forever stuck in his edgy emo sad boi phase ok

(me tooooooo)

PART H

1. What is your OC’s orientation, romantic and/or sexual? Has it ever been a source of stress for them? Have they always been pretty sure of their orientation?

*Not setting everything in stone here, just as with real people, there’s totally room to change, this is just what I’m thinking as of now, tho I haven’t traditionally characterized any of these guys, so they change every day lol! I always learn new things about my characters (which I try to share) so that’s my disclaimer!

Reeve:

So I did write her hetero for both, but I’m not actually super sure anymore? She maybe could be bi?

Lonan:

Aha, Lonannnnnnn. So this is going to connect with my answer for Harrison later on, but I’m also not sure on both sides ? I used to be pretty set that he was both heterosexual and heteroromantic, but I’m leaning probably toward bisexual x biromantic, though I’m not sure if these particular labels fit him. All I know is Lonan likes Harrison (and Harrison likes Lonan lol), tho navigating his head when it comes to this has been a bit confusing (which I get), so I don’t have a set answer to be honest.

Foster:

He is both heteroromantic and heterosexual

Harrison:

Ahhha, so. I’m also a lil confused when it comes to Harrison too, which is something I’ve been meaning to discuss on here for a bit! I recently mentioned he is bi, not sure if that’s still set? I’ve been trying to navigate whether or not he likes women both sexually and romantically, just sexually, just romantically, etc?? We’ve established Harrison is in love af with Lonan, and is attracted af to him, just ahhhh my brain has been all over the place with Ris. I’m like, not sure if he’s bi, or gay or ??? like ?? dunno ?

Darren:

Admittedly not something I’ve thought about extensively, would probably say hetero for both

Clifford:

Hetero, but maybe biromantic?? I mean him and Julian tho ??? I haven’t thought about Clifford in a very long time oops.

PART L

1. How have your characters changed since you created them?

Reeve:

So I’ve been writing Reeve for almost four years now, and I can confidently say I only figured out who she really is very recently. Reeve hasn’t actually changed very much since book one, I think I’ve just realized who she is more, so her actions reflect herself a lil better. She’s a self-centred person, and pretty much always has been, but because I know that that’s her character, and not me writing her wrong, I’ve been able to push that even more in book six versus book one. She’s also a lot less empathetic than she was, but honestly, she hasn’t made too much positive change, just remained as she was before, but worse.

Lonan:

Lonan ‘changed’ a lot, namely because I didn’t know he was going to be Reeve’s half brother until book three (he was intro’d in book two). Change isn’t a very good word for him, because like his sister, he’s remained the same person, but the way he acts has differed slightly. So how I perceive him has changed, would probably be a more accurate sentiment because his character hasn’t changed much. He’s impatient as he was in book two, a lil narcissistic, hot-headed, arrogant. I’d say he’s changed the most in terms of self destruction. He’s always been self-destructive, but he’s even more so now.

Foster:

Foster is a lot milder than I initially wrote him. He had a bit of sass to him in book one, but this totally actually isn’t his character, which I realized as I went along. He doesn’t stand up for himself nearly as much as he used to, and his submissiveness has increased a lot. It’s funny (and kind of awful) that I’ve never actually characterized these guys with backstory (just went on as it happened), so a lot of things change as I go, but his sass tho? Where did it go ?? He cracked more jokes too ??? now he’s so serious ?? He also wasn’t vegan before but now he legit is?? Foster is hella posher than he was before, honestly.

Harrison:

Harrison’s a lot more mature now than he was in book one. His character arc is kind of funny, because he’s hot-headed, impatient, funny, sassy, etc when he’s 17, up until he’s 19. From 20 onward, he’s a lot more mature, and less childish, and from 25 onward, reverts back to his seventeen year old self, lol. Harrison’s patience has increased a lot more tho, and he also isn’t volatile at all. He’s a huge softie who I somehow didn’t realize liked the bois even tho it’s so obvious he does like ? Rachel r u good ??? he is so down for the rainbow tho ? taste the rainbow doe ?

Darren:

AHA Darren has changed SOOOO MUCH. Darren was supposed to be a horrible person, narcissistic, bitter, very sharp and blunt, selfish, etc, and that’s how I planned him to be. Literally the instant I wrote his first line into the book he turned into a total softie seweetheart with the biggest heart of gold which actually doesn’t work for my future plot but I can’t help that he’s literally a dream come true as a person? He went from stupid villain to SWEETERMANSSS.

Clifford:

lol I wrote Clifford as a hardcore ‘I don’t give two fucks about this world, fuck you man’ kind of guy who was honest and kind of an ass for about the first three chapters of the original draft of I’M DISAPPOINTED when I realized he’s actually a cinnamon roll? I struggled to change this in my earliest edits (I think I have notes saying MAKE CLIFFORD LESS OF AN ASS) a lot. He wasn’t supposed to be anxious af either, or care about his family. Needless to say, pretty stoked he changed lol.

2. What do you consider the biggest themes in your character, if any?

I don’t really consider theme very much, if at all in my books or characters (this is more so something I look to after the fact if it ever comes up), but I’d say a huge theme for everybody is loss? I dunno why, but loss is one of my favourite things to write because it almost acts as a vortex for more potential problems to integrate into a story. I really like dealing with messy situations in my books, and loss really allows me to do this, as well as segue into other characteristics in my characters, such as selfishness, anger, deceit, sadness, etc.

3. Did you create the character to be like yourself, did they end up being like yourself, or are they very different from you?

Reeve:

No, conceptually, she was never meant to be anything like me, and in execution, I still don’t think she’s anything like me, lol.

Lonan:

No, he also wasn’t created to be like me, and remained nothing like me until around book four? Lonan and I are still very different (he’s hella calculating and not emotional lol), but there are parts of me that I now see in him.

None of these characteristics were intentional, but he totally got my worst characteristics. Sometimes these characteristics (mostly) are more exaggerated in him than me (such as coldness), but yeah he’s kinda like my evil alter ego, lol.

Because of this, Lonan is kind of the closest character to me, strangely, and I’ve had a dissociative episode ft. him, which was strange but interesting!

My doctor has deemed Lonan my lil guardian buddy who reminds me of the laws of the real world (like yo if u jump off something u gon fall hunny gravity is a thing), which is fascinating to me (could talk about this forever!) because I never considered him to be that close to me?

Foster

lol no not me at all, wasn’t created that way ever

Except we both love tofu and could probably drown in tofu and not be mad about it?

I need to write a scene with Foster and tofu oml

Harrison

Aha, no he wasn’t actually created to be like me at all, and I never thought we were similar until a year or two ago! He’s kinda like the ‘extroverted me’ obvi I think I’m colder and more cynical than him, but we could vibe since we’re on a similar wavelength lol

Harrison is like all the sunshine in me, so subtract the Lonan from me

Darren

Also no, Darren wasn’t created to be me, and I think he’s too nice to be similar to me, lol.

Clifford

So Clifford was never created to be like me at all. We started out as being two very very very different people, and then suddenly he ? was ? my ? emo ? alter ? ego ? tho ???

Clifford was a very suave boi before I figured out who he was, and when I did, he turned out to be an anxious, angsty, existential boi who is no lie basically a self-insert ahahaha

4. Would you hang out with your OC if you could?

Reeve

Is it mean if I say no, lol. She’s not a people person or a friend person, and I dunno what we would even talk about. Obviously if I could hang out with all my characters that’d be fun, but I dunno if I’d even talk to Reeve, looool oops

Lonan

Yes! Just because I’d really enjoy provoking him. Lowkey would hate me, but I could see his superman hair in person ? tho ?

Foster

queen yessss catch us gushing bout tofu and chickpeas ????

Harrison

QUEEN yes! ft. ABBA on karaoke tho? Hanging out with Harrison would be so fun because he’s actually not boring like Lonan who we would poke fun at and then I’d be like yo hunnyyy snatch up that date for yourself thoooooo and we would talk about boys lol

Darren

Also yes! Darren is so generous and kind and funny and tbh how tf is he single hmu Darren tbh let’s eat Oreos and watch musicals

Clifford

I don’t really want to hang out with Clifford because that would be horribly awkward? But I think jamming some guitar with him would be very fun and then we’d bond and write angsty poetry on our hands

5. Which OC do you think is the most decent morally or behaviorally? AKA, which is supposed to be a ‘good guy’?

loool not Reeve

My order from most morally sound to least morally sound:

Darren

Foster

Clifford

Harrison

Reeve

Lonan

None of these people are particularly antagonists in terms of the bias of the story. I would say Darren, Foster, Clifford and Harrison are all 100% not antagonistic at all. Reeve and Lonan are technically ‘heroes’ but ha, no. I’d definitely say in other perspectives, they’re both hella morally grey, and in many cases, very morally wrong.

6. Which OC do you think is the worst morally or behaviorally? AKA, which is supposed to be a ‘bad guy’?

The award is going to Lonan, but Reeve is right up there with him. Neither Reeve or Lonan are supposed to be the ‘bad guy’, they just make poor decisions. At the moment, Reeve is making worse decisions than her brother, so, their moral decline kinda switches at times, lol. Neither are the antagonists of the book at least from Reeve’s narrative bias, but I guess if you think about it, they wreak the most havoc for the most part.

7. Which OC do you think is the most attractive?

Heh I love that this is the last question! I think they’re all rather decent, and have their own attractive qualities tho? Some observations:

Reeve

Kinda plain not gon lie she cute doe

Lonan

Bird boi, The hair swoop tho? #itsignifieshisdownfall, that jawline tho?

Foster:

Fresh boi, gotta iron dem dress shirts, #oxfords, #shoepolish, #hairgel

Harrison

Hawt boi, That shaggy hair tho? The leather jackets and cigarettes tho?

Darren:

Suave boi, EVERYTHING tho??? His hair ??? His face ??? His personality ???

Clifford:

lmao

Thanks for all the questions! Whattup at this long post, good on you if you made it this far!

–Rachel

#writing #amwriting #asks #writerblr

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Working on Your Relationship – By Yourself

You Can Create a Successful Relationship – Even If You Must Do It Alone Conflicts can be expected to arise in even the strongest of relationships. Two people who attempt to create a relationship always bring their own issues, backgrounds, expectations, personalities, and inner difficulties into the interplay that occurs between them. It is not at all unusual that the two people might find themselves, at times, in a deadlock. They see no way to break the impasse and to recapture the spirit of good will that they once had and would like to have again. Each party’s personal conflicts come into play and stifle the communication, sharing and love that seem necessary for harmonious interaction. Rather than confronting our own part in the problem, we may resort to blaming our partner – “If only she (or he) would change, then we could be happy.” While it is ideal for the two partners to agree mutually that there is a problem that needs to be confronted and to show an equal amount of motivation in solving the problem in relationship therapy, this goal is not always achievable. The reality of the situation is that one of the partners may not be ready to work on the problem – and the reason for this may be perfectly valid. For example, one partner may fear that working on the relationship could bring up other problems. Or one of the partners may feel inadequate in talking about relationship issues and may have fears of being attacked if he or she were to try relationship therapy (although this is, in reality, a highly unlikely event). Or perhaps the partner feels unable to make the changes which have been called for in the past. Commonly, one of the partners just doesn’t see that there is a problem, and therefore fails to see his or her contribution to the difficulties. Whatever the reason, there are times when one partner is simply not ready to work mutually on the relationship. This is a fact which must be accepted. But it does not mean that the relationship is doomed. Rather than condemning our partner for his or her inability to work on the relationship, it is far more productive to show respect for our partner’s view and to take matters for bettering the relationship into our own hands. There is a great deal that one partner, acting alone, can do to create a relationship which is happier and more fulfilling for both parties. Working alone on a relationship problem can mean that we have to take a look at our own issues and our contribution to the difficulties with our partner. While this challenge is not always easy, the pay-off in terms of our own emotional wellness can be enormous, both for our own future personal happiness and for the success of our relationship. Working solo on a relationship may mean coming to terms with the anger we have fostered (perhaps for years), taking responsibility for our own happiness, breaking out of our old ways of seeing the world, changing our expectations about how we should live everyday, and accepting the good in our relationship as being good enough. It may mean letting go of some of our most entrenched behaviors. We may even find that letting go can bring us tremendous rewards that we never expected. Think of a relationship as a system with two parts which strives to achieve balance. It can be compared to a see-saw. When one of the partners makes a shift, the other partner has to make a comparable shift to maintain the balance. This often works negatively. For example, if Chris reminds Michael to take out the trash, Michael, feeling controlled, might back off and stop communicating. In turn, Chris then criticizes Michael even further for breaking off communication – and Michael retreats even further. A balance is achieved in this case with a pattern of blame and withdrawal. How can the balance shift in a more positive direction? Chris might decide to stop reminding Michael to take out the trash. In fact, Chris starts taking out the trash. Michael does not feel controlled in this case and has no need to break off communication. Showing appreciation to Chris for doing this chore, Michael starts taking out the trash. Both parties win in this case, and a positive balance is achieved in the relationship. (Of course, this could backfire on Chris, who may end up taking out the trash all the time. But at least the old pattern is broken, communication now has a chance to succeed, and Chris can assess whether it is more important to maintain the relationship with new ground rules, even though it is flawed and far from ideal, or to continue the old pattern of blame and withdrawal.) Here are some ways that one party, working alone, can improve a relationship: Take Care of Your Own Needs We often look to our partner to provide for our needs, and this can be a big mistake. People, whether they are in a relationship or not, need to function in a whole and complete manner. The best relationships are generally those in which two healthy and fully functioning adults come together and enhance each other with love, support, trust and nurturance. They appreciate the gestures of love that they receive from their partner, but they would be able to live full and complete lives even if they were not in a relationship. We sometimes think that the two people should give equally to the relationship in order to achieve a balance – but it may be more productive to see the balance in a different way. Think instead about achieving a balance within yourself, so that the question becomes one of deciding how much to give to the relationship and how much to give to yourself. There are some things that you may want and which you can provide for yourself. You see these things as non-negotiable. For example, if your partner is always late for social events and you find this unacceptable, try going once alone – and the next time your partner will probably be ready on time. If your partner feels threatened by this, gets angry and starts an argument, try showing some empathy and decisiveness. Don’t participate in the argument. Simply say that you understand your partner’s feelings, but that this is something which is very important to you and you have decided to do it. It does not mean that you are rejecting or abandoning your partner, but it does mean that you are asserting yourself in a healthy way and taking care of your own needs. A simple act of assertiveness can often break a destructive pattern of mutual neediness. Do the Exact Opposite of What You Have Been Doing Each partner in a relationship plays a role. It is important to identify the role that each of you plays and then try to make a change. One way of accomplishing this is to identify your role and then do the exact opposite. This takes courage, because of fear that abandoning our previous role will only make the problem worse. In truth, however, changing this role will compel your partner to make a change as well, a change which may enhance the relationship. For example, Joan complains that Jeff plays golf all the time and doesn’t have time for her. Joan plays the role of the one who nags and Jeff plays the role of the one who rebels by playing golf. If Joan were to change her role from nagging to supporting, Jeff might make a change from rebelling to cooperating. Joan could learn to play golf herself, ask Jeff about his day on the course, and buy him some golf-related gifts. She could also cultivate her own interests. Jeff, in turn, realizing that Joan is now doing the exact opposite of what she had been doing, will no longer feel that he has to rebel against her. Because she shows support for his interests, he will then reciprocate by showing more concern for her needs. People respond much more readily to support than to criticism. The old destructive pattern has now been broken and each partner is now free both to pursue their own needs and to give to the other. Relax Your Definitions of the Power Struggle When we are involved in a relationship conflict we often resort to all-or-nothing thinking, and it is difficult to think outside of this box – “I am right and my partner is wrong.” The more you insist on your point of view, the more your partner defends his or her position. The two opposing ways of thinking become entrenched. It is helpful to defuse the situation by trying to develop empathy for your partner’s point of view and by relaxing the sense of urgency you have about your own views. The following thoughts can help to increase the flexibility of your thinking: “My partner is just being herself. She means no harm. She’s trying to do her best. I need to appreciate her just the way she is. I need to stop trying to change her or to convince her that I am right.” When you try to get your partner to see things the way you do, you are actually searching for love and closeness. You want complete support, a partner who can affirm your way of thinking. Understand, though, that this is exactly what your partner is searching for too. Try to empathize with your partner’s view, and this can open the door to the closeness you want. You may feel an urgency or anxiety about asserting your own view. You don’t have to abandon your views, but you can work on the anxiety you feel about affirming your views. It helps to take a live-and-let-live approach to your struggle. Relax – and trust that things will work out well. And they often do. Ask Your Partner to Help You Solve Your Problem Rather than blaming your partner and creating an air of defensiveness, try reframing the problem. Make it clear that you are the one having the difficulty, and ask for your partner’s help in solving your problem. For example, instead of blaming your partner for spending too much money, it might be more helpful to find a good time to have a talk about how you feel very vulnerable financially – and then enlist your partner’s support in finding ways for you to feel more financially secure. You will find that taking ownership of the problem yourself can bring you much more support and closeness within the relationship. You can help create the conditions where your partner has an opportunity to rise to the occasion rather than feel blamed because your needs are not being met. “Search thy own heart – what paineth thee in others in thyself may be.” – John Greenleaf Whittier Working alone on your relationship means working on yourself. By making a shift in how you define your own sense of self, thoughts and feelings, you can help create the conditions which bring your relationship into a state of mutual harmony, support and love. A trained professional therapist can help you identify and modify patterns in the way you approach your relationship. The rewards can be immeasurable – for both you and your partner. Is It Fair That I Have To Do All The Work On The Relationship? No, it is not fair – but that’s all right. Consider the alternatives. You can stay in a deadlocked relationship if you choose, but then each partner loses the potential benefits that can come from a healthier and more supportive commitment. Or you can let the relationship dissolve completely. This may be a viable option if the situation is intolerable, abusive, or completely mismatched. However, if there is a chance that the relationship can work, it is worth trying different approaches which have not been considered in the past. After all, ending a relationship before considering alternatives may represent an absence of fairness and a potential source fvinstitute.com/article/working-relationship of regret in the future. When considering the idea of fairness, remember that many things in life are not fair. Illness, financial setbacks, and grievous losses come to the best of people. Even if there were complete equality between you and your partner, there is no assurance that the problems in your relationship would be solved. Part of the human condition is to persist even when circumstances are not ideal. Your partner may lack the ability to provide equal input into solving the problems of your relationship. This is something worthy of acceptance. It is not ideal, but it is reality. Sometimes the strength and courage of one person is needed to compensate for the shortcomings of another. The real test of fairness is to question whether you are creating the best life you can. In any relationship, we need to provide a balance, not necessarily between the two partners, but on the dimension of balancing your own needs against the needs of the relationship. The source of your happiness lies within and is derived from your physical, emotional, mental and spiritual strengths. Working on these factors within yourself puts you into a firm position to attend to the demands of your relationship. A relationship requires flexibility, effective communication, some hard work, and a lot of good will. When we feel complete within, we are in a strong position to create the conditions which can lead to a healthy and thriving relationship. Perhaps there is some truth in the old saying that it is only when we love ourselves that we can truly love another. Follow and click the link to read more about this article and see many more leading articles on marriage, couples, and family: http://fvinstitute.com/article/working-relationship/

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