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#the fear of being abrupt and incohesive in between posts…
eternal-reverie
·
14 days
Text
got the posting anxiety bad tonight
#click clack
#ok a peak into my thought process and anxiety here we go
#ok so the art is almost done and up to standard I would post onto my art blog
#BUT for some reason the thought of posting art of my ocs there scares me
#because even tho it’s my art blog in my mind it’s the equivalent to a art gallery that demands being detached????? from the art
#like once I share it there it’s no longer ‘mine’ but to the public
#and my ocs (plus the stories that go with them) are like the closest to my heart and relinquishing them feels like a lot
#a part of my imagination that I spent so much time with developing over the years to be placed up for judgement…
#so then the solution could be to put it here on my personal! the online space cozy enough and filled with other posts that could easily bury
#the original posts I put here
#but there goes my other dilemma. i don’t want them too associated with my personal for if one day i do muster up something for publication
#my big fear is that ppl will find this space and go thru everything. the fear of being perceived and judged 😵💫
#all the hypotheticals and anxiety for something that may not even happen
#dumb mind problems my head made up 🙄
#anyway writing it out helped lol I’m posting it to my art blog I decided 👍
#I have to work on getting that blog to be comfortable space to post… i should lower that silly self imposed standard I set for myself
#and be whatever about ppl being aware of my online presences
#maybe… [grinding my teeth] I should post my messy sketches onto my art blog…
#I should take my friends suggestion and make a website to feature my ocs…🤔
#idk my only other solution that doesn’t feel viable to mitigate the anxiety is to slowly introduce my ocs in the background of setting art
#just a slow drip until they are in the forefront
#bleghhh whatever much ado about nothing it’s like I never posted my ocs ever when I have indeed posted them before on both places ( º_º )
#I’m realizing it happens too when I post too much fanart in a row… I have curator disease??? 🫨
#or something I used to be very particular about what order I reblog stuff like it used to be by color and content balanced out
#I still do to a lesser degree… but it used to be pretty bad
#post order compulsion????
#the fear of being abrupt and incohesive in between posts…
#if you read this far thanks you can now see how much this consumes me 🙃
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