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aimasup · 1 year

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How do you think Wander x reader scenarios would go? (I’m a WOY fan, so I’m quite curious)

sorry for the wait on this aaa

ok bc this is a romantic ‘x reader’ no one is undateable, I’m just ranking these 6 guys from ‘best partner’ to ‘most work needed to put into the relationship so it’s not a complete shitshow’. WOY is a show based on platonic love so some of these are stretches

Also unless specified otherwise in the ask, y/n isn’t a villain or anything, just some random person

long, long post warning

Wander:

buddy when I tell you that you SCORED

he’s SO sweet oh my god. has tons of specific scenarios for dates, but it doesn’t matter if it’s a life-risking adventure or knitting in the woods. he just loves every second spent with you

he’s snuggly! he’s cuddly! You’ll never be touch-starved with him! And he’ll note if you’re not a hugger probably but he might get too excited

You’re dating a walking plush toy built like a scarf with the cutest scruffy face at the end of it that also has wild animal mannerisms

you could toss him in a dryer with malicious intent and he’d come out with a love ballad for you ready to go

knows a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy. You’ll always have the option to meet new friends and go to new places

If you didn’t have an adventurous streak before meeting him you do now. He doesn’t seek conflict, conflict seeks him

He does his very best to accommodate any needs you may have, he respects your boundaries and finds solutions to brighten up your day

you also brighten up his day. get ready to be sick of the phrase 'I love you'

he does his fair share of the chores and more. He also loves cooking for you! You become the couple everyone’s jealous of because Wander’s in it and you get to experience his cooking

He doesn’t butt in to do things for you, but he loves making your life a little easier. So instead of ‘is everything comfortable my liege’ it’s more ‘I made you a lunchbox, have a nice day!!<3'

Wander has so many stories to tell. You learn new things about each other a lot. He has no problem filling silences, it’s like he never runs out of conversation topics

He loves talking about you so much. Now the entire galaxy knows they have something to use against Wander, next to Sylvia

He's your personal therapist now

Cons:

his energy can be draining, especially when he’s on a roll and oblivious to what’s happening with you

his selflessness blends into unintentional martyrdom often. You need to do some rescuing so he doesn’t get himself killed just so you could have some exotic dessert; it’s very stressful to see him put you above his wellbeing

he’s so stubborn actually. when he decides something’s for the better it takes some heavy lifting to shove the proof in his face

the concept of privacy is but a suggestion to him. And he’s open to suggestions! It’s just that a pet always wanting your time is cute, but when it’s your date it gets annoying

if you nicely let him know when he’s overstepping boundaries he’ll apologize and make up for it

Sylvia:

she rejects that lovey-dovey romantic stuff but she’s more similar to Wander than she realizes, in that this tall mass of muscle is endlessly devoted to you

if you’re fine with being lightly made fun of and sassed at a ton, then you both can spend any time ribbing at each other casually

It doesn’t matter what you’re doing, she enjoys time spent together

she loves chilling. just vibes. umbrella drink and hammock and nice music and all. You two can hopefully just exist in the same room for long periods of time, there’s a lot of comfortable quiet going on.

she’s very clear about her boundaries and expects you to pull your weight in some capacity, though it’s fine if the task she needs done isn’t done soon.

she makes you feel powerful and safe and secure because she has no problem beating the shit out of troublemakers for you, and also yelling the most profane of insults in public. She can talk to any stranger, take control of any situation, bust through any boulder; it’s kind of scary but also empowering to just witness

Logically she might understand why something could emotionally upset you but she can't truly empathize, so she settles for being there for you all the way

she ends up carrying you a lot. under her arms, on her back, with her tail, like a sack of potatoes by the leg, etc. and she loves! cuddle piles! and curling up around you when you’re both sleeping! Tease her about it and she’ll toss you into a lake (out of love)

she stutters when she’s awkward. it’s cute as hell

You can go to her with any problem you have and she’ll comfort you, and give you advice even if she states that it’s a ridiculous issue. 95 percent of the time she’ll be on your side too

if you’re willing to learn, she wants to teach you how to fight. She worries about you and wants you to be able to hold your own without her around.

If you order something and she says 'nah I'm good' it's a LIE. She'll have a bite of whatever you're having. So get her something too even if she protests

she’s also fine with goofing off when needed. And she’s tough enough to try new things with you, might even have more fun than you while at it

meeting her family is emotionally exhausting. the ‘WHEN IS THE WEDDING’ questions don’t cease. you turn to her and go ‘damn bitch you grew up like this’ and Sylvia ‘had a job at 6’ Zbornak goes ‘yeah why’

she’s not as open about herself as she’d like to be, but if prodded she could tell you some tidbits about what bounty hunting was like

You may have trouble keeping up if you’re not very physically active. She has trouble slowing down too

your wedding is officiated by Wander, who is also best man. Wesley is the ring bearer god bless

Cons:

She not as stubborn as Wander but has trouble putting herself in the shoes of others, or seeing things from another perspective.

unless given a good reason to budge, she’s not moving when her mind’s set on something

a bit too quick to anger. Not directly at you, but sometimes her remarks cut too deep and her snark is too dry, and the lecture’s too loud.

She’s not very (outwardly) jealous, unfortunately she doesn’t trust easy. So your new friends, or new job, or new anything that she catches even the slightest whiff of ‘not right’ in her mind, she’ll be worrying and pointing out flaws here and there, and now both of you are anxious

you can talk to her about things she can change about herself, and she’ll try. You ground her and her temper and she likes that about you.

Peepers:

see this post

Hater:

on paper the 7 foot tall skeleton overlord with teleportation, force fields, electricity, levitation, and planet-toppling raw strength sounds like some grimdark video game villain but he’s just your personal phone charger now

wants to know about you as much as he wants you to know about him

he always looks for an opportunity to impress you or gain your attention. He likes showing you random stuff, all his shiny toys, his video games, some flower he found at the side of the road, etc.

at the same time he tries to be cool and aloof. He’s also genuinely pissed that he enjoys your company so there’s a lot of screamed affection

not good at speaking or gestures, better at actions. Surprisingly touch-affectionate. He loves carrying you, or holding your hand, or kissing.

You end up being added to the list of people he makes an effort to listen to. consider yourself lucky

He complains about everything but when it comes to things you find neat he doesn’t hate them as much now that they’re associated with you. You are the chill pill.

He talks edgy but he's an open book, and you impress him easily

both of you can geek out over the same things like music and weapons

He’s actually really good at words on paper. So things like secret love letters, lyrics, or rehearsed speeches.

Will loudly defend your honour in public, will try talking it out if he has to

mate you are about to learn some RESPONSIBILITY this man has no home skills. If you don’t want your diet to be takeout for the rest of your life start learning how to cook

If you decide to get married it will be a whole Thing and you'll learn how many times he's organized a wedding before. Ask the watchdogs

Cons:

his whining gets legitimately annoying, and he doesn’t make compromises nearly as smoothly as you might hope. It’s almost like dealing with someone who only recently learned how the world works (so you don’t want to ask about his real name.)

loud, petty, self-centered, possessive, and sometimes you can’t deal with that if you’re both having a bad day

When he’s doing some grand gesture of romance it usually ties back into you giving him compliments

Despite being emotionally open he doesn’t talk about what goes on in his mind a lot, so he might come to bizarre conclusions or not explain his thought process, even if he’s on the right track

he’s self-aware to a degree at least, and he’s actively trying to not make everything about him.

Awesome:

banging my head on the wall, trying SO HARD to find redeemable qualities

he’s the kind of fucker to smugly say ‘you know I’m right’ regardless of how obviously he's not. He thinks obnoxious property-damaging prank videos are hilarious.

his style of villainy is almost worse than dictatorship because he has such little regard for the people and places around him that his hedonism literally causes worlds to end

in other words he’s so disgustingly shallow that the simple concept of an equal in his life at rock bottom would force him to fix himself

anyways uhh dating him would be weird. Like he’s physically useful I guess, also he’s rich so you’d get anything you want. Speaking of physical, he's a really good meat shield in times of crisis.

not controlling, just weirdly opiniated. Thinks any past time that isn’t clubbing or drinking or high-energy is lame, seperates himself from ‘uncool’ things, judges passersby in a mean way, is far too encouraging of you to step out of your comfort zone, etc.

You need to be assertive because he still cares about what you think, somewhere in there.

So if he goes ‘no biggie but I think you’ll look better in this’ or 'no don't spend your time like that', or ‘you shouldn’t call them back’ just get rightfully upset and demand why. Guarantee he will not have a good reason to keep this up. Know your rights and make sure that man knows guilt

Pros:

ok this is either a bad thing or a good thing but he’s observant enough to know how to distract you. If you’re mad or sad about something he can push all the right buttons to get your mind off it, but again he can use this to deflect from serious stuff

surprisingly responsible? Like idk how to explain it. He knows what items go with what needs and is really good at planning ahead. Not like making a shopping list, but like connecting the dots based on logical assumptions. “We could get this sturdier metal hanger for the drying rack but it rusts easily so we should get the cheaper package deal ones.”

such a stereotypical dude-bro that it’s kind of adorable. He watches sports and has opinions on canned alcohol. Also a great hype-man.

you literally never need to worry when going to social events. He has enough confidence for the both of you.

probably hits a turning point when he realizes that the people he hangs out with are dicks when they make fun of people like you and does the tiniest bit of self-evaluation without coping horribly

not protective or jealous. Doesn’t even get mad really. Laid-back about so many things and knows how to roll with the punches, knows when to draw some lines. He's very honest too, in the funny way

eventually he does get okay with mediocrity and mundane activities. He still tries to make things more exciting now and then, it backfires but that's the fun of it

his cats love you

Dominator:

hoo boy where do I start

there is literally an entire episode on why she’s a terrible date. Her thought process in the beginning was LITERALLY ‘ughh I’m bored -> ugh lookit that planet -> ugh I bet those guys are having fun -> how dare they -> I wish I could DESTROY THEM’ like girl what

needless to say getting her ass kicked might’ve humbled her by like 5 percent but she’s still kill-happy

She perpetuates her own cycle of a ‘dog eat dog’ world by being a dick before anyone else can. Either because it’s self-defense or a competition or it’s fun

The way she speaks to you, even if she genuinely enjoys your company, she just can’t help but throw some insults in there. Not passive aggressive ones, just plain insults.

If you’re into that then a one night stand would be fun but she’ll forget your name the morning after

If Emperor Awesome is manipulative, then Lord Dominator is controlling. She doesn’t understand why you aren’t feeling what she thinks you’re supposed to be feeling, or dropping everything to come spend time with her immediately, or egging that innocent old man on her command.

her casual, bubbly attitude can be dissonant with the actual situation. it’s not that she can’t read a room, it’s that she’s thoroughly analyzed it and concluded that it’s either hilarious, irrelevant, or beneath her

The only way she’d even get close to you in the first place is if you had something she wanted in the first place, like information, status, or power.

the relationship is an accidental bonus, and now neither of you know what’s happening, and ‘oh god what do you mean you’re Lord fucking Dominator’

You are dating a gangly pocket knife with anger issues and hips for days. This might as well happen

She’ll deny it to her last breath but she’s fiercely protective of you, like how wild animals become protective of those they see as weaker than them. The way she shows this is either by kicking ass or glorious, glorious insults.

Pros (?):

"What is this?" "Affection." "Disgusting. Do it again."

If you’re indecisive or anxious, her authority fills that gap. She fully emits the vibe that she owns any room she walks into, and eventually she might have you learn to stand up for yourself too.

She’s not a Mean Girl, she can’t fake nice with a straight face. The phoniness also wears her out; she prefers telling it like it is. This is also a con

Lowkey really hopes you find her impressive, which is easy given all the things she can do, but also hard because of her loser vibes

If you learn to banter with her, arguments get entertaining, and it becomes a conversation in itself. You also need to out-weird her and annoy her as much as she annoys you. And now you both can get your way with minor conflict

you can watch cartoons and talk about pop culture together. Not to mention she can always entertain you or make you laugh, intentional or not. She can recite a whole gorey B-movie from memory, and also act it out, and it intimidates you but that's what happens when the wifi goes out and she's bored

Like Wander, you end up in dangerous shenanigans together. She’s passionate like Wander, assertive like Sylvia, chaotic like Hater, organized like Peepers, fun-loving like EA, and also smart and diabolical and talented and dorky in her own way.

#wander over yonder #my post #woy #woy wander #woy sylvia #sorry for making you read all that #emperor awesome #lord dominator #lord hater #commander peepers #x reader #y/n #headcanons

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