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januaryembrs · 1 year

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HEARTBEAT | Geralt x reader

Request: hellooo! if your still up for requests i'd love a geralt one please! perhaps reader is vary of horses (maybe even afraid) and he tries to help? <3

description: After learning your fear of horses, Geralt takes a gentle approach at teaching you to trust his companion, Roach.

Word Count: 1.1k

Trigger warnings: fear of horses? close proximity?

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Authors note: I'm back finishing the last of the requests sent, I do so apologise for the wait I've been super busy over Christmas and hope to satiate you all soon!

“What’s wrong?” Came his rugged voice, knocking you out of the stressed reverie you were in.

“What?” You asked, half mindedly, “What do you mean?” You repeated, finally coming out of your thoughtful daze.

“You’re being strange. Have been ever since we left town,” You felt caught. Witcher’s were naturally observant men, something you cursed yourself for not thinking of before, now that it had come back to bite you in the arse.

And you had been acting strange. First it was refusing to mount the horse Geralt rode, Roach you knew her to be. You were tired all the time from walking the whole way to the next town while Geralt had the luxury of a steed, though you had brought the punishment on yourself you supposed. Then it was flinching every time the poor mare so much as whinnied, which she did so a lot when spooked by the monsters Geralt brought down. And now you refused to even sleep if she was too close to your bedspread.

When you had been in town, it was not so noticeable. You spent a lot of time at the inn you were staying at, away from the bay coloured mare, so Geralt had not noticed the odd habits before. But now the two of you had hit the road and were sleeping next to a campfire instead of a roaring hearth, it was much more apparent.

“I-” You cut yourself off as the words died in your mouth. Your face blanked for a moment, thinking long about how you were to explain the issue to a man who knew no fear.

Geralt slayed monsters for a living, monsters that knew how to kill and kill well. Some of the bodies he brought back were two, three times his already mammoth size, and he still managed to charge at them without any hesitation.

How on all the gods names were you supposed to tell him you were scared of horses?

“Spit it out, then.” Geralt grumbled in his brash manner, though you could see in his amber eyes he was veiling his annoyance over true concern. Perhaps you wanted to leave him, he had expected nothing less. The two of you had only been friends a matter of months, but everyone always tires of him and his lifestyle eventually.

He knew exactly what was to come out of your mouth.

I don’t want to know you anymore.

“I’m scared of horses,” His head whipped up to meet your sullen eyes. Your face painted that of deep embarrassment, avoiding his gaze and poking at the fire with a frown.

“What?” He bit, the confusion of the sentence clear as a bell in his tone. “What do you mean? It’s a horse.”

Your face flooded with heat that surely hadn’t come from the camp. The way he said it made it sound such a foolish fear to have. And it was, you supposed. Roach had never made any move to harm you or anyone else for that matter. But the idea of being atop such a muscled beast and giving her full control of whether she throws you off her or not made you frozen to the bone.

“No shit,” You snapped, though all rebellion died in your chest as you accepted the fact he was clearly judging your fear of such a harmless creature. “I know it sounds ridiculous, I just always have been scared of them, alright?”

Geralt pondered with a frown. Not even his usual ‘Hmm’ made an appearance, and so the two of you sat in silence. You feeling more foolish by the second, and him thinking fast of how to get through this problem of yours.

Until he stood up brashly, walking over to his furred companion. You thought for a moment he was going to leave you here alone, thinking he stood much better chances with someone who was not so cowardly. And how could you blame him? You would hate to be stuck with someone so fearful when it came down to such a hostile environment.

“Come here,” The behemoth man commanded, though he did so as gently as his rumbling voice would allow.

You stared after him, eyes flicking to his outstretched hand, following his figure up to the calm mare that seemed unbothered by her owner's close proximity.

You hesitated for a moment, before standing and following his orders. Slowly taking steps towards the two, Geralt caught the moment your breath died in your throat as Roach grunted as horses normally do. He saw the way your fingers clenched at your side and your step faltered.

He lowered his hand to calmly take yours in his large grasp, gently tugging you towards him and Roach despite the way he felt you resist.

“Geralt-” You protested, her long snout seeking out your new smell and blowing hot air in your face. You tried stepping away from her, but Geralt’s body encompassed yours and forced you in place. His one arm stayed holding your wrist easily, while the other came around your body to push her snout away from your face softly.

“She’s just curious about you, is all. She won’t hurt you,” Geralt tried to soothe you, feeling his strong heartbeat pressing against your spine. He began shuffling you forward under her neck with a strength you still tried and failed to resist against.

“Geralt, please,” The panic was clear in your voice. You didn’t like horses and never would, and this kind of close exposure to them may have worked for some but only made you more on edge.

“Just trust me,” He whispered in your ear tenderly, lifting your arm up to her muscled chest. Your hand met her soft fur, her skin quivering momentarily at the contact though she showed no sign of upset, and his large hands spread your palm out onto her own heart beat.

“Horses' hearts beat much slower than yours, did you know?” He murmured, keeping you tucked under her head and in front of him. You shook your head, feeling your own chest pounding at the proximity to such a beast. “Witchers hearts beat even slower than that,” His breath was close to your ear now, as was Roach’s on your opposite side. You felt as if you were being squished in between the two of them, their breaths synchronising as they rolled down your spine in equal parts heat and chill. For every other beat of Roach’s heart came Geralt’s reverberating strongly in his chest, and it was then that you realised what he was doing. They sounded the same, horse and man. Hearts beating alike, breath swarming your senses gently, no danger to be found.

If you should be worried about anything on your journey, it should be the monster-slaying beast that stood behind you that caressed your hand so kindly, and whispered in your ears that made your breathing stutter.

This time when Roach nickered in your direction, you felt little fear, atleast half of what you’d had before. There was nothing to worry about when you had a man like Geralt guiding you.

#stars' 1k follower shebang #geralt of rivia x you #geralt x you #geralt of rivia x reader #geralt x reader #geralt fanfic #the witcher x you #the witcher x reader #the witcher imagine #the witcher fanfic #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill x you #henry cavill characters

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littledrummeraussie · 4 years

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Hii I love your blog a lot and the followers are well deserved! 🍭(/⭐️) idk if it's a continuation per se but you recently wrote a bit into size kink with Ashton? Would you expand on that a little more?

I’ve got you, babe! 💟 Thank you for your lovely words! 🥰

- - - - -

warnings: 18+, cause you know. big dick energy and talk. size kink. the whole shebang.

“You like it, baby?“ Ashton’s chuckled, the sound turning into moan as your fingers stroked his hard cock up and down.

“It’s just so big,“ you couldn’t take your eyes off of him, a blush colouring your cheeks, bottom lip bitten as you watched him.

You’ve been seeing Ashton for a while now, but the two of you never actually got to the point to have sex with each other. That is, until he called you up that the guys ditched him and he had an unopened bottle of wine that the two of you could drink while talking about life. It didn’t take much time to finish your first glass, both of you tipsy enough to just feel good, and the next thing you knew was that the conversation took another turn, and you were talking about sex and kinks.

The wine helped you feel more at ease as you let it slip to Ashton how guys built like him always turned you on, shoulders and back wide, arms and thighs thick, frame massive and beautiful, perfect for cuddles and holding onto it while having sex. He had a grin on his face as he lightly teased you, asking if there was something else you liked in large size, maybe even extra large, and you laughed into your glass, but couldn’t hide how your eyes moved between his face and his lap, and Ashton quirked an eyebrow at you.

There was no denying it that you had the hots for each other, especially not after you saw Ashton shifting next to you, a bulge straining against his pants more and more, cock slowly tenting his sweats. You leaned over, pressing a small kiss on his cheek while your hand rubbed down his arm, slipping to his stomach and slowly to his hips, lightly pressing against his hard-on through the pants. He hummed at the touch and you felt your face turn hot as you felt the size of him under your palm - you’ve always imagined him being big, hell, it was obviously from the way his jeans clung to his massive thighs and crotch. But this - this was unexpected and definitely a new experience.

“Are you going to tease me for the rest of the night,“ Ashton reached for your face to grab your chin, lightly pulling closer. “Or are you ready to finally move onto... bigger things?“

That’s how the two of you ended up naked on the couch, Ashton resting back against the armrest and you sat between his legs, fingers wrapped around his thick length as you pumped him, still tasting him on your tongue after trying to take as much of his cock into your mouth as you could. His noises told you that he enjoyed you sucking his dick like your life depended on it, and promised you that he will help you with your gag reflex so you could finally take him as deep as you want.

“Come here, babe,“ his fingers ran up on your thighs and grabbed your ass cheeks, finally pulling you into his lap, making your straddle him. “Fuck, is that wetness all for me? So sexy, baby.“

“Ash, please,“ you whined against his lips, fingers squeezing his shoulders as you rubbed against his cock, and he groaned, slowing down your movements.

“Do you think you can take it?“ he kissed into your ear, teeth biting your earlobe. “It’s a really big dick for such a tight little pussy. Might not fit inside you.“

“Please, I want it! I just-- I just want to feel you in me!“ you kissed Ashton’s jaw as you tried to rub against him more and more, and he finally stilled you, tapping his cock against your clit. “Fuck!“

“Come on, baby, take it,“ he pulled your face to his, swiping his cock between your folds until the tip pushed against your hole. “Sit back on it. Wanna feel how tight you are for me.“

You buried your face in his neck, a whine leaving your lips as you let the tip of his cock slip inside you, and your fingers grabbed onto his hair, tugging on it as you slowly let the next few inches stretch you. Ashton lightly stroked your back, lips whispering praises into your ear about how good you were for him and how perfect you felt around his cock.

“Yes, just like that. You’re taking me so good, love, your little pussy stretching around my cock like that. It was made to be fucked by my big dick.“

“I just... I--” you licked your lips, body slightly shaking as you tried to take more of him inside you, slowly adjusting to his size as you were sinking back down on him. “Want you all the way inside. Want you to fill me with that big cock.“

“Just a little more, baby, that’s it. Get those last inches as well,“ he pulled you back a little, making you hiss as you started to work yourself back down on him until finally you felt him bottom out.

“I’m so fucking full,“ you scratched at his chest as you let yourself adjust around him, the stretch slightly burning as you shifted in his lap, making the both of you moan. “Didn’t think you were this big... fuck, feels so good!“

“Such a snug little pussy around my cock,“ Ashton grabbed your ass, pulling out slightly just to push back inside, and you felt every inch of your body scream from the pleasure. “You wanna get fucked with it, baby?“

Your only answer was a whimpered yes, and you felt Ashton wrapping his arms around you, pushing you down on your back as he hovered above you, cock still buried in your pussy. He wrapped your legs around his waist to pull you closer, then teasingly pulled out until only the tip of his cock was inside of you. Before you knew it he slammed his whole length back, and you saw stars as he leaned down to you for a deep kiss.

“Don’t faint on me yet, baby. We’re just getting started.“

🎉 join the 1K celebration. ❤️

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taglist.

@mymindwide @loveroflrh @sadistmichael @notinthesameguey @babylonashton @talkfastromance4 @dead-and-golden @fuckyeah5sostakemehome @karajaynetoday @ashtondaddy90 @myfavfanficsever @myloverboyash @suchalonelysunflower @castaway-cashton

#ashton irwin x reader #ashton irwin smut #ashton irwin blurb #fiction time #littledrummeraussie 1k celebration #asks: fiction edition #1K fic #afic: 1K celebration

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januaryembrs · 1 year

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MASTERMIND | Theon Greyjoy x Bolton!reader

Request: @marsconer says - hii!! hru? the requests are still open? if so i can request for a theon one, with mastermind by taylor swift as a prompt?

description: You knew you wanted him, none of it was accidental. Theon had no idea the Bolton bastards were masterminds.

Word count: 1.1k

trigger warnings: dark!reader. reader is not mentally well and believes Theon loves her even though he doesn't know her. RAMSAY KINDNESS? Ramsay loving the Reader as her brother. hints of Theon's torture.

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authors notes: First I'm so sorry this is so late to be published things have taken a turn in my life and writing has had to be put on the back burner. but I'm back! and I'm trying something new, I've never done a dark reader before. I hope this was okay! I feel like its not but I'm trying :)

You knew you wanted him the moment you set your eyes on the Stark’s ward.

He wouldn’t recognise you, how could he? The last time you’d ever seen him he was a teenager, too busy chasing girls in pretty skirts and competing with Robb for the fair maiden’s attention to take note of such a plain, quiet girl like you.

Ramsay noticed you staring almost immediately. Being your older brother, possibly the only person in the world who understood you and loved you since you were both Bolton bastards, he was determined to give his sweet, little monster anything she wanted.

“He’s caught your eye, sister?” His ice-blue eyes followed your entranced gaze to see the scrawny Greyjoy boy, too busy yanking a maid’s pigtails to notice you looking. His eyebrows furrowed, “Are you sure you don’t want someone stronger? Someone who could protect you and whatever babes you give him,”

“He has a kind face,” The maid squealed, and noble Ned Stark leant forward to smack both Rob and Theon across the ears to set them in place. “You will get him for me one day, won’t you Ramsay?”

Ramsay looked down at you from your place at the back of the dining hall. Being bastard children, you were not permitted to sit with your father beside the noblemen. Instead, you were among the last to collect your supper, drank the dregs of the wine the other Stark council did not consume, sat near the chill of the open windows. You had less in this world one might think for those born to a nobleman like Roose, but Ramsay had always made sure you had the best he could get, even if it meant getting his knuckles bloodied as it did most of the time.

“Of course, sweet-hearted. Anything you want is yours. When you’re of age to marry, he will be yours,” He smiled with too many teeth as he always did, making his face look sinister to others, but to you he was your dearest brother. The only one who understood the way your mind worked, in a way that others would call twisted you called unique.

Watching Theon Greyjoy that day, you knew your brother would never fail you.

Ramsay made good on his promise as he always did. A few days after your ten and eighth birthday, he led you down to the lower passages of Dreadfort claiming he had a present for you. You had never quite forgotten about the Stark’s ward. But with the chaos the people were now calling the war of five kings, you had some trouble keeping up with his whereabouts. He had betrayed the Starks, killed the youngest two boys, boys he had grown up with like brothers, all for his own gain of power.

Nothing could make you so certain he was perfect for you. A man who would stab his company in the back in the name of helping his genuine family was exactly the man you wanted.

You had always known he would be special, that he would understand the way your mind ticked. While everyone called you cruel, he would love you the way you loved him.

So when he led you to Dreadfort dungeons, and there was Theon Greyjoy, strung to a flaying cross, you felt your heart swell in excitement.

“For you, my dear sister. Just as I always promised,” Ramsay presented the man, who looked scruffier than the last time you had seen him, just a few months before the war started. Again you had been just a fly on the wall in Winterfell, but this time was different. This time he would know who you were, know just as well as you did you were perfect for each other.

You squealed, squeezing your brother around the waist in a tight hug. “I knew you could do it, I knew you would never disappoint me,”

“Please help me!” Theon begged, though his words fell on deaf ears as you moved closer to him, “Please let me go, I’m not supposed to be here,”

“Of course you are, silly,” You said, reaching up to unbind his arm. You were smiling at him almost too wide, a crazed look in your eye that you shared with your brother, as though this was all a part of a bigger plan he knew nothing about.

Theon was sure he had seen you before, sure he had felt those two eyes piercing his skull many a time before. But he didn’t know you.

“W-what?” Theon asked, as his first hand was let free, and you began to undo the second, “What do you mean? I need to leave, I need to find my father,”

“Don’t be ridiculous, you just got here. We need to arrange the wedding first,” You said simply, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. Poor Theon was confused, and his battered face said as much.

“Wedding? What wedding?”

“Ours, of course,” You replied, working away at the knots in the rope. Theon looked over your shoulder to see Ramsay’s face full of a silent fury, as though he was warning him against upsetting the woman who was trying to free him.

But Theon being Theon was lost, curious. He was disoriented and tired and hungry, and you were making no sense. “Ours?” He cried in shock, “But, I have no idea who you are,”

You froze before the knot could be pulled free and immediately Theon felt the mistake he had made fall over the room in deadly silence.

Your eyes snapped to him, and the manic look was gone, replaced by pure hurt. “You don’t know who I am?”

“Should I?” Theon felt Ramsay’s eyes darken in the shadows of the dungeon. If what he had said before had been a mistake, then those two words felt like a death sentence.

Your bottom lip started quivering. All you had ever wanted, ever dreamed of was fading right in front of your eyes. You were supposed to be his, the way he had always been yours.

“Come, sister,” Ramsay jumped in, tucking you under his arm and leading you to the dungeon door, “I will have a word with your dearest fiance, I fear he is feeling a bit under the weather at the moment,” You retreated away from the Greyjoy boy, knowing sweet Ramsay would fix everything for you as he promised. “Let me have a word with him, make sure he remembers to cherish you even in his sickness,”

You nodded solemnly, your sad eyes never leaving Theon’s fear stricken face as he realised the hidden threat in your brother’s words.

And within moments, the door was closed and he was left with the vengeful face of Ramsay Snow, and Theon wanted for nothing more than to have you back near him, promising him the world.

#theon x reader #theon greyjoy x reader #game of thrones x reader #game of thrones imagine #game of thrones fanfiction #Theon Greyjoy imagine #Theon Greyjoy blurb #Theon Greyjoy fanficiton #stars' 1k follower shebang

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januaryembrs · 2 years

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Hi! Congrats on 1k once again!! Can I request handholding and forehead kisses with Din Djarin? Love, love, love your writing!! <3

TOUCH THE SCARS | Din Djarin x reader

description: you and din console one another after you make the difficult decision to hand Grogu to Luke Word count: 1.1k trigger warnings: parentless reader, reader has a scar on her face, destroyed home? main masterlist

authors note: this was a response to my prompt sent by the lovely @lexloon who always brightens up my days with their comments on my din djarin series, Ad Astra, but this can also be read as a sequel to a previous imagine I did kiss the scars

Skin on skin contact was not something that came naturally to you. A whole life spent hidden under your beskar armour meant you had been isolated from the feeling of another being touching your hidden skin for the majority of your life. You had never felt the warmth human skin could bring, the only semblance of such feeling being the memory of your mother cradling you when you were just a young one.

That was before the Empire ripped your family away from you, your blood family at least. The Mandalorians had found you cowering in the remains of your childhood home, sneezing and crying at the dust the rubble had produced, confused as to where your parents had disappeared to. You remembered looking up at the sound of masked talking, worried it would be those storm troopers returning to take you away too. But no, you looked up at where the night sky beamed in through the gaping hole in the wall that certainly was not there before.

There stood two huge figures, both dressed head to toe in the thickest metal armour you ever saw.

They were a man and a woman, the two who had found you. The man immediately began scanning the perimeter, as he had announced, while the woman knelt down to you, her face hidden by a red painted helmet though her voice was soothing, scooping you into her arms protectively.

You sometimes wondered if that was what the child had seen when he had looked out of his pod on that first mission when you and Din had found him. Had you ever known how much the young boy would come to mean to you, you perhaps would have been as gentle and kind as the woman who found you had been.

And now he was gone, once again the Empire had stolen him from you. The only place he would ever be safe anymore was with one of his own, that was what the Armourer had said. And so you’d travelled to the ends of the galaxy and back to contact any other of his sorcerer kind you could find. And one had shown up, just as planned.

A young man named Luke Skywalker had arrived in time to save you all from the dark troopers, and take the child to a place he will never be harmed again. You knew it would hurt, but you didn’t realise how empty everything would feel without him.

You and Din had gotten one last chance to remove your helmets in front of your boy, let him caress your faces in shock and give him one final kiss on his forehead to say your goodbyes. He had felt so wrinkly considering he was a baby you remembered thinking, and it would have made you laugh if you hadn’t just lost what felt like your own child. Your own son.

You and Din had made it to Nevarro with Cara as she found you a place for the night, not that you had been listening. Everything seemed foggy with your helmet back on. He was gone. He didn’t need you chasing after him anymore; he had one of his own real family to take care of him now.

“I miss him,” Din broke the silence behind you. He too had been quiet the entire journey back, the two of you sitting in the ship's corner with your cold armour masking the weight the hurt carried on your faces. It wasn’t until you’d made it to your room for the night, to a place you could be alone together, he took off his helmet and the heartache was clear on his face.

“I know,” Your voice felt drugged with disuse. The last you’d spoken was to say goodbye to Grogu, your son Grogu. Your son. Behind your eyes stung the second you had thought it. “We did the right thing, didn’t we?”

“Hey, don’t do that,” Din chided softly, and you heard him stand from his place on the bed to walk closer to you. His bare fingers interlocked with yours to turn you to face him, and you figured he must have removed his gloves the same time he removed his helmet. It was nice, feeling his warm skin in your palm. He had hairy arms, you couldn’t help but notice, soft but hairy. And his fingertips seemed ironed of any wrinkles you’d expect in this job though you supposed it was for the fact he always wore his thick, leathered gloves. “He needed to be with his own people. There was nothing else we could have done,”

He was gentle though. Caressing you softly as if you were a wounded animal. He brought his hand up to softly stroke the side of your face. “I’m sorry,” You whispered, “I know you’re hurting too,”

The man smiled small, and it was still all new to you to see his facial expressions after going off his voice alone for so many years. You had only revealed your faces to one another just days ago at the imp base, you still had so much mapping out of one another to do.

Din looked down at you, his deep sepia eyes scanning over your furrowed brow and sad lips, his line of vision trailing up the scar that lay across your nose. “I am,” He said solemnly, as if admitting it to himself first, “But we can hurt together, I guess,”

He leaned in, his one hand still locked in between your own as the other slipped behind your head to lace into your hair faintly. You drew in a breath, thinking he was going to kiss you. You wouldn’t have minded, the sensation was still just so new to you, the closeness of his skin on yours. But his path diverted at the last moment and he pecked your nose softly instead. His lips followed the trail at which your scar marred your face, over the bridge of your nose and through your eyebrow, until he landed on your temple where his lips stayed until you lifted your hand up to weave around his wrist, needing to use every chance you could get to touch him you’d seemed to realise.

The hunter pulled away. Two armorless Mandalorians missing their son staring back at one another, every morsel of the other's skin being a signature of home to both of you.

“Together,” You echoed into his neck, so quietly as if you wished to keep it a secret from the rest of the world.

Din just smiled down at you. That was how it was now, the two of you alone but together nonetheless.

this was written as part of my 1k follower celebration. please feel free to send in 1000 word drabble prompts of your own!

#din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin imagine #din djarin #mando angst #mando fanfiction #mando x reader #the mandalorian #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x female!reader #pedro pascal characters #stars' 1k follower shebang

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januaryembrs · 1 year

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PAST LIVES | Kylo Ren x Ex-Jedi!Reader

Request: For the drabble idea :3c Kylo Ren x Reader were lovers at the Jedi Academy. After The Incident reader believed he had been killed, reader ran away from Luke/the resistance and never knew he became Kylo. Their paths cross again, and he recognizes the reader, but reader does not recognize him until he reveals his face.

description: lost love is sweeter when it's finally found. I've got the strangest feeling, this isn't our first time around

Word Count: 1.5k

Trigger warnings: children nearly dying, choking (violently), gun shots, saber fight, kylo ren

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Life had been peaceful for the last five years. Peace and quiet ofcourse came as a package deal with living a life of near solitude on a remote planet, with a tiny community being the only people you spoke to. They knew you as the mysterious stranger that had practically crash landed in their crop field the first day you arrived, but they were kind enough to nurse you back to health and stitch up the scorch mark that now marred your face.

They didn’t ask many questions of where you came from, just reassurance that whatever it was that had done that to you wasn’t wishing the same fate for them, which you swore it wouldn’t. You had surely gone far enough that they couldn’t find you, though the guilt of leaving Luke and the other Jedi at the temple to face Ben’s wrath alone had weighed heavier on your heart than any saber cut or burn ever could.

You had fled the second you’d seen his eyes; what were once calm waters had looked at you with the fury of a mad man. That was not your Ben. Never your Ben.

Luke had practically shoved you into a discarded solo jet to get to safety, leaving you no choice but to abandon the only family you had ever known. You were too much of a coward to go back all these years later to see the aftermath of that wretched day.

Life on Sorgen was happy enough. There was only so much excitement to be garnered from Krill farming and you much preferred the livelihood of the trading docks than tending to the tiny, blue creatures in the pools surrounding the village. But you always remained aware, sceptical. Always kept an eye over your shoulder for any first order spies wishing to bring a stop to your slice of peace.

It was a nice enough life, but it was never the one you’d had planned. You had been destined for greatness once, and greatness never came from krill farming or wasting your days with your tail between your legs. You had wanted a life with him. Oh, Him.

You spent your day as you did most week beginnings by searching through the newest shipments being brought into the market place from the inner rim planets, mostly smuggled junk that could provide useful for the people in your village. You handed a few credits to the tender, pocketing a new blaster for the woman you neighboured who had complained she was beginning to feel uneasy with the conflict being brought to the outer rim planets between the first order and the resistance.

Just last week had seen a stand off in the same market place you were now stood in. A merchant accused of housing resistance spies and smuggling them radios to contact home base. But you kept your nose well out of it, knowing you were more valuable to the first order than any damn radio.

You were picking over a round of blaster bolts when they came.

Tens of in-sync footsteps met your ears, trunching in unison through the dirt streets, the sound getting closer.

Then the screaming started.

Your head shot up as blaster fire began ricocheting off the walls further down the small town. A small group of villagers emerged around the corner that the chaos had originated, some holding children tightly to their chests, others making a break for it alone. It was then clear to you the source of the violence.

A troop of first order soldiers rounded the corner, their blasters drawn and loaded, shooting at anyone getting too close to their squadron. The ones at the front began flipping over market stands, rummaging through crates, kicking down doors to canteens and, by the sounds of it, eliminating every possible target inside the buildings too.

“Where is the resistance spy?” One of them roared through his vocoder at a bystander. She shook her head in freight and hesitance. You felt your chest constrict with something dark when he raised his blaster and shot through her chest mercilessly.

It was then that your mouth dropped open. There was nothing stopping the first order once they had a lead to follow, you’d heard of entire planets being destroyed for such an offence as harbouring resistance.

You wanted to flee, like you had all those years ago. Turn tail and run far away from any sign of the people that eradicated your family, ruined your life. That took him from you.

Your feet spun on your heels, ready to make a break for the treeline to hopefully avoid them, when you saw him.

He was dressed head to toe in black, like an omen of death, wearing a mask reminiscent of the one they called Vader. The red saber in his hand only confirmed the worst of your fears, that this figure was not someone to be meddled with, that they must be powerful in the force to be granted the weapon of the Sith.

The reaper-like figure reached out a single hand, and without much effort lifted two children into the air and cutting off their airways. The young boys choked loudly, grasping desperately at their necks to try and pry the invisible hand away from them as the figure yelled at their mother, demanding information.

You felt the littlest boy slipping away, felt his life force dimming as his skin began turning purple. No, You thought desperately, your fingers twitching to grab your own saber stashed in your pocket, Please no.

Ren was about to deliver the final blow, his fingers tightening and ready to snap their necks if their hysterical mother didn’t give him the answers he wanted. What he wasn’t prepared for was the recognizable sound of another lightsaber being ignited through the crowd.

His own head whipped to the source, seeing his troops begin shooting at one single target in unison. A few dropped to the ground limp as the shots were deflected back at them, but what really made his mind tick was how four troopers were flung through a stone wall with a small flick of your hand.

An experienced force user, it seemed.

He shoved his way through his squadron, cutting down his own men who did not move out of his way fast enough. He seemed to have caught a rat in his trap, maybe they even knew where the resistance was.

The ultramarine hue of the saber reflected off his men’s helmets, and he drew his own weapon in front of him in preparation.

You dodged every shot they gave you, swinging your saber naturally between your fingers as if the whole thing was a dance. You moved smoother than water, your footwork delicate yet precise as you cut down the troopers and gave the young boys the respite they needed to escape.

It wasn’t until you felt the darkness in him that the chill ran up your spine, making you whip your head to his figure, just in time to shield yourself from the ignited saber swinging down at you.

Your weapons crackled with pure energy as they met, a dreadful crash of thunder reverberating through the market as the two of you pushed against one another.

“Why don’t you pick on someone your own size, murderer,” You hissed, using your free hand to flick the blaster shots away from your vulnerable side.

Kylo Ren froze. It wasn’t until you kicked him square in the stomach and sent him stumbling back he caught a look of your face, one he could never forget even if he tried.

The scar had healed badly, cutting through the entirety of your left cheek and barely missing your eye. Your eyes, your beautiful eyes he loved, he’d once cherished, that looked at him as if he hung every star in every world in every galaxy, that frowned at him with such disdain and hatred now.

You. Oh maker it was you.

You advanced on him again, swinging with an anger he had missed, though he’d admit you caught him in his astonishment and he narrowly avoided being cut through himself.

And so it went; you attacking, him merely defending, as you also used your good hand to defend yourself from his troopers. He wanted to scream at them to stop fighting you, to leave you alone, but Snoke would have his head for being so merciful to an enemy.

“Fight me!” You yelled, swinging harder, moving faster. “You cut down innocent children just fine, but a worthy opponent joins and you waver,”

“Stop,” He pleaded, his chest tight with indifference as to what to do. The fury was clear on your face, curling it up into a grimace that made you a snarling animal.

“Fight me,” Your voice ordered, though he could tell you were tiring of the chase.

He saw his chance when your right side was unguarded and he was able to hook the back of your leg and throw you to the floor.

In the time it had taken for you to jump back to your feet, his hands came up to his helmet, ripping the mask off his defeated face.

The growl slid off your visage immediately. It was Ben. Your Ben. Your Ben, who you had left amongst the massacre five years ago, who you loved with every fibre of your being, who you were supposed to marry someday, that's what he told you.

“Ben,” You whispered. He felt the air whoosh out of him, what was he supposed to say to you. You would be so disappointed in the darkness he had followed, the path he had chosen.

The two of you were so occupied with staring at your past lives that it was no wonder you heard the blaster shot until it was too late, and the heat of the charge cut through your stomach with no remorse, and you fell to your knees.

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januaryembrs · 2 years

Note

Congrats on 1k followers! May I request a drabble about watching a meteor shower for Kylo Ren x gender neutral reader?

COSMIC SIZED GUILT | Kylo Ren x gn!reader

description: you start to question if you and Kylo are on the right side when you see the destruction Starkiller Base has caused. Word count: 1.2k trigger warnings: mention of death, planets destroying, one curse word main masterlist

authors note: I posted this as part of my 1k follower celebration where I write 1k words for a prompt sent to me in my asks. Feel free to participate!

No one had ever told you what a planet exploding would look like at a distance. You expected a thunderous clap to ricochet throughout the galaxy as you watched the three distant spheres fulminate with a bright light from your place on Starkiller base.

You had taken many lives in the name of restoring the sith, in the name of impressing Master Snoke. You had ransacked the village looking for that pilot and his damned droid just the other day, cutting down anyone in your path with just a single swipe of your notorious, blood-red sabre. But exterminating planets, planets, at a time, you were not prepared for.

You masked the guilt rising in your throat as you heard millions of cries out for help all be silenced in a single second, their lights in the galaxy dimming as if a switch had been flipped, and they ceased to exist.

“Good work, my apprentices,” Snoke’s voice boomed behind you, dragging you out of the pit of regret you had found yourself in. You had the good sense to hide your force presence in case Snoke had even an inkling of you feeling doubt for the First Order’s cause. You knew the reaction would be formidable, deadly even. “I expect this to be the first of many victories,”

“It will be, master,” Ren’s voice came from behind his mask, a deep timbre that grounded you back to the room you were in, reminding you of how high the stakes were if you were to be caught feeling sorrow for your actions.

“Good. Then I will leave you both to celebrate the win you have brought to the First Order.” Snoke praised in his gravelly tone, a sinister smirk evident in his voice. You felt your mouth moving to thank him, but you knew you sounded alien even to yourself. You knew Kylo’s eyes were on you, but your gaze hadn’t left where the planets had once been, where thousands of rocks of debris were now falling out into the rest of the atmosphere, trails of fire being left in their wake at the speed they hurled at.

With that, Snoke stopped force projecting onto Starkiller base, and you and Kylo were left in silence.

“We made an immense move for the cause today,” Kylo said robotically, though the pair of you knew conversations were never usually so formal between the two of you. You were acquaintances after months of serving Snoke side by side, trained together to become formidable fighters despite the fact you both knew he was just that bit better than you.

“Indeed,” You replied in that disconnected tone again. You heard him open his mouth to say more, but didn’t give him a chance to boast just how amazing it had been to make a move so bold against the resistance before you turned swiftly on your heel and paced out of the door towards your room where you could think in peace.

But the maker was not so kind. You heard Kylo’s footsteps pounding behind you as to follow your retreating figure. You’d felt his force presence trying to crack its way into your head the second you had spoken such detached words, as if he knew you better than to believe the gratitude that had come out your mouth.

You only made it halfway back to your room on the base before he grabbed your arm tightly and spun you around to meet his now maskless face.

“I thought you would be happy,” He said quietly, eyes flicking at all the points of your face that could show any sign of what it was you were thinking.

“I am happy-”

“Don’t give me that bantha crap,” He cut you off in a hiss. You looked behind him at the large window showing the pure darkness of the galaxy, now aflame with the remnants of what you had done. Your eyes must have betrayed you as you watched the debris of the planets that once were there launching its way through the inky black sky. Kylo followed your eyeline to the pieces of rock now clustering together in the gravitational pull to race one another around the base, creating their own meteor shower.

It should have been beautiful, two young people watching little pockets of fire rushing past them, the only light to shine on their tired eyes. It should have made you feel something, anything other than what you did feel. That long plunging notion of remorse.

Kylo turned his head back to see your face now withered of any mask. You knew you could tell him out of anyone how you felt. No matter how hard he tried to be the golden boy of Starkiller Base, follow Snoke’s every order meticulously, you knew you could trust him.

“I knew what we were doing from the beginning, I’m not an idiot,” You whispered, and the guilt in your eyes made him frown in confusion, “But I didn’t know it would be so heavy,”

“What do you mean? We needed to show them they should listen to us or face the consequences,” Kylo said icily, taking a step away from you as if you had slapped him, “They will never follow us if they don’t believe we will ever punish them,”

“I know, I know. I always knew that was our plan,” You said in a melancholy tone, reaching forward and grabbing his hand, “But I feel them, Kylo. I feel every single one of them in here,”

You put his hand onto your chest where your heart beat rapidly, and finally let him feel your force signature. The hatred, the sadness, the guilt. Every single creature that had died on those planets that called out to you for help, screaming in your head for you to stop their pain.

His face changed within seconds, and for the first time in years he felt like Ben again. The boy who knew love, who knew compassion and goodness, and would also feel so disgusted with his actions. The part of him he buried down long before you had come into his life was there, staring at you longingly as if he felt every shred of sorrow you did for those lives.

He felt your pain pulsing through your skull, their voices in your head he would do anything to silence, to take away from you, a suspicion confirmed when he raised his other hand to cradle the side of your head and pull you in close. He used his overwhelming force power to take the throbbing headache away from you, to silence every last one of the voices that had plagued you, and you felt yourself sigh in relief when his force met yours as if you cradle even that part of your soul in a way he never had before.

He made everything feel alright again. If you had no one else to grovel in your pain you would at least have him. He would at least hold you this gently knowing what a monster you were. What you had done.

Before you could so much as get comfortable in his caressing grip, he had pulled away, and long gone was Ben Solo, long gone was the gentle touch and the shared guilt.

Kylo Ren stared down at you venomously, and you felt your head spin at the change in his face.

“Kylo-” You started, but he cut you off with a chillingly cold tone, so different from his warm embrace you couldn’t seem to shake off even as he had practically shoved you away.

“You should figure out which side of this war you are on. I would hate to have to fight against you should it come to it,” And with that he stalked away, his mask slipping back over his face and taking with him the only semblance of comfort you had left in this world.

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