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raine-kai · 3 months

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So I saw the Spy Family movie.....

And because I love Spy Family, I decided this was a good chance to try a 4D experience.

It did not work out for me.

For the first forty-five minutes or so, I was convinced that it was the 4D experience detracting from the movie.....but as I grew more used to the sensory overload, I started to realize it was not just the 4D but the movie itself.

So to spare my SO and other friends from being inundated with walls of texts analyzing this movie, I've brought my thoughts to Tumblr where I will slice open this movie and extract its shit (SPOILER) just like the villains keep threatening to do to Anya.

This is very much a spoiler post. My only spoiler-free thought is that if you are more in it for the animation, it's worth checking out. If you are more compelled by story and relationships, then spare yourself. If you saw it and liked it, I'm happy for you and this is not me trying to change your mind.

For me, this movie was a crime of Writing That Does Not Understand The Source Material.

Let's go small, and build up to the bigger crimes of this movie, shall we?

Who am I kidding, it's because one of the strangest, yet funniest, parts of this movie is the first thing I want to talk about. But before I get there, I want to acknowledge that the writers of this film were visibly operating under certain constraints.

Part 1: We've Gotta Get the Whole Cast In

I have no idea whether this was a constraint imposed by the studio or one of the film-specific producers or what, but clearly someone somewhere wanted a movie which had a role for every single semi-regular character on this show.

So many of the problems with the plot of this movie can be traced back to the need to incorporate every single element of the extended cast, and only one of those cast members is allowed to be used as a joke (which is, of course, Franky).

I say "of course" because I think that narratively, Franky's involvement is the easiest to undermine as a joke.

But in fact I do feel that the reason Franky ended up being used for a throwaway joke highlights the problem with this movie, which is that it does not understand the characters.

Because the thing is, I had thought earlier in the movie that Anya was behaving in a way that she usually is only inclined to in the presence of Franky.

The story tries to give Anya this mini-subplot where she thinks that her parents are about to break up and matchmakes them. The story understands that this would display a better understanding of romance than Anya usually does, and so employs a flashback with Becky as well as Anya's comical mispronunciations to highlight that she doesn't really understand what she's dealing with or her matchmaking solution. But the thing is, Anya's matchmaking is usually done with Franky in tow. Anya coming up with a stereotypical matchmaking scheme on her own is...a little odd.

Of course, this also highlights how much shit this movie is just recycling from the show without understanding its context. But we will get there.

Part 2: Oops, Anya Ate the McGuffin

Listen, as a concept, this is hilarious. It was literally stored in food—and in a particular food that would be poisonous to Bond, such that in the scene where Anya accidentally eats it, I was desperately worried that Bond would eat it.

So uh...yeah. That's the plot. Anya ate the McGuffin on the way to the vacation to facilitate her learning to make a traditional sweet that will help her get a Stella....(which is a very convoluted plot even excluding the knowledge that a lot of us will go into the movie with that she will not get the Stella, since the movie will have to maintain status quo)...and the bad guys target her and wanna cut her open.

The most bizarre part of this was probably the whole Anya Needs To Shit sequence. This movie kind of had an inconsistency problem with imagined sequences, where some of them were drawn in that childish style to indicate that they were definitely imagined scenarios versus the ones that were illustrated exactly as the rest of the film which creates some troubling implications I'll get into in Part 6, but the Anya Needs To Shit sequence was both bizarre and glorious.

The animators were clearly having the time of their lives. Did it feel like someone trying desperately to find some content to fill airtime? Yes. But given the runtime and the very scattered nature of the story, I will definitely defend the existence of the Poop God sequence. It doesn't need to be there, but by being there, it gives this movie personality and character that it would be lacking otherwise. The rest of the movie is this paint-by-numbers hodgepodge of bits of the show and genre tropes (from shonen as well as family comedies) that, despite the feel-good moments at the end. Without this sequence, the movie would have no personality whatsoever.

So, on that front, it's great.

But at the same time, there is so much weirdness around this. For instance, it is used as a message to children viewers, "never take other people's stuff" without also addressing the issue, "you should brush your teeth."

Because sure, Anya went into that suitcase out of greed. But part of the motivating factor was Bond's foresight about the contents of the suitcase containing a treasure. The narrative pays this a lot of focus and paints the moral for children, "Don't touch other people's stuff". And yet after all that focus on Anya shitting out the microchip, it's stuck to her tooth and comes out with a sneeze???? And nobody even comments that Anya should have maybe brushed her teeth before now?

Please. Own your bizarreness. Let Anya shit out the microchip.

Part 3: Weren't We Supposed to Be Keeping a Low Profile?

Now, it's not unexpected that these movies recycle canon material and reuse highlights in different contexts.

But this movie seemed to forget that a core tenet of the Forger family is that they all want to keep a low profile.

And yet we get Loid openly challenging a military officer who wants Anya's cake, Yor kicking Loid out of a ferris wheel near the top and then, though the movie does not show us specifically, implying that she jumped out after him.....

Add to this the weird subplot that there's another more suitable person to take on Operation Stryx. It's like everybody has forgotten that the highest priority is not appearing suspicious.

Part 4: The 4D Experience

So, 4D probably just isn't for me. That's fine. It happens.

The flashing was particularly unpleasant, and I had to close my eyes during some of the gunfire scenes in the climax because all the flashing lights in the theater were just blinding.

Early in the movie, the weirdest parts were the way the chairs would vibrate in response to characters' reactions. It took me a while to get used to.

Even after I was mostly used to it, though, it was intensely weird to feel the center of the chair pulse rhythmically in time to Tobari's pulsing heart eyes. It made that scene feel way more horny.

I never got used to the little air darts they deliver to your ankles, which always felt like maybe the person behind me was throwing popcorn at me under the seat (even though these seats are too sturdy for such a thing).

I'd seen the warning that you get water sprayed at you, so that in and of itself did not shock me too much..though it did bother me that the first water puff I noticed came during the Poop God scene, which felt very gross. Subsequent water scenes just felt odd in that the characters are getting drenched while I was getting this light spray of water that reminded me of the Poop God.

-50/10 for me, even though honestly I was kinda there for the chairs shifting and tilting through the air battle scenes.

Part 5: So Loid Took a Bunch of Stupid Pills...

Wow, Loid sure forgot his priorities for a movie, didn't he? Haha...ha...

The thing is, I do feel like they were aware that the premise looked weird priority-wise for Loid and were doing their best to write in a reason why he would make the choices he makes.

So now not only is this about the chance for Anya to win a Stella through a pastry competition, it's also about getting to maintain his position in Operation Stryx, with the threat of someone else taking over the mission.

Except....none of this makes sense.

Even if they put another spy in position, why take out the Forgers?

And given that Operation Stryx remains the highest priority, Loid's priorities are deeply off throughout this movie, which act as if his time spent with his family are less important.

This is a point that canon is very good at balancing. Loid enjoys his time with his family, but he rarely simply allows himself to enjoy it, because it is just a mission.

The Loid of this movie seems to be one who is trying to balance family and work, which...may make sense for a version of Loid down the line who knows he values his family for real and views them as something real, but he is not there in canon yet. This creates a head-scratching storyline where Loid keeps abandoning missions for other missions with little to no understanding of the human emotions of the people he is dealing with.

Part 6: ...But That's Not The Worst Part

This movie wants to treat the Forger family as a dysfunctional family that does not communicate, more than a group of people with disparate goals who are pretending to be a family and in the process becoming an actual family. For the most part, this is a subtle distinction. But there are key moments when it is not.

What this movie did to Anya's abandonment issues is really what got to me, enraged me, and cemented it for me as a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Movie.

Canon takes a very delicate approach to Loid and Anya's relationship. Loid is using Anya, but Anya knows this because of her telepathy, and has fun being part of his spy work. Yor knows none of this, and when Loid pushes Anya too hard, helps remind him that she is just a child with human needs above all.

The movie contained a scene where Loid is trying to impress upon Anya the importance that she do a certain thing to get a Stella. Now, Anya understands Operation Stryx and knows how important it is. She knows her role in the operation and in the family, and is always trying her best. But in this scene, Anya expresses that she isn't sure she can do what Loid is asking. Loid, in response, thinks about how this will mean the end of the operation and thereby the end of the family—which spurs Anya into action.

This is the dynamic:

LOID: You need to do this thing.

ANYA: I don't think I can...and I don't want to.

LOID: [unconscously] Oh well, I guess that means the end of our family then.

ANYA: WAIT, please, I'll do it, I promise! I'll be good!

The implication is toxic and horrific, and goes somewhere that canon never has. In canon, Anya's knowledge of the mission balances the pressure Loid places on her, and Loid himself is more inclined to acknowledge the amount of effort Anya puts into things and make alternate plans that take her actual abilities into account, and that is what turns into increased motivation for Anya. This, unlike canon, is just emotional blackmail.

To make matters worse, the art almost seemed to be treating Anya's insecurities about her family as founded in reality, by not changing the art style on one single imagined sequence, and that sequence being the one where Anya decides to sneak out to buy the non-alcoholic cherry liqueur. (Which, isn't that just cherry syrup??? But never mind.)

There's this underlying feeling that the writers of the movie did not understand the role canon Loid serves as emotional anchor to Anya, nor that it is Loid and Yor's ongoing compassion, validation and support that are turning them into a family. The Loid of this movie felt incredibly cold and unfeeling toward Anya for most of the run of this movie in a way that canon Loid never does.

While he had some heartwarming moments toward the end, they did not make it up for me. If anything, they felt duplicitous to me, because they did nothing to address the underlying problems with Loid's attitude toward Anya for the rest of the film.

Frankly, I could even take issue with how Loid treated Yor, because he seemed to be trying to romance her organically in this film? Even though in canon, he only does so at this stage as a calculated plan, and generally they are business partners in their marriage.

The entire family dynamic was just a little bit off in a way that felt like fanfic written by a person imposing their own worldviews onto canon. Which, nothing wrong with that, except that this is an official movie, and I spent a few thousand yen to see it, to my regret.

Part 7: But Was There Anything I Did Like?

It wasn't like this movie has nothing to recommend it. As I've mentioned, the Anya Needs to Shit sequence feels like some animators and the voice actor of the Poop God were having the time of their life and I dig that despite the bizarreness.

Yor also deserves a shout-out. She really shone in this movie, not just because of her show-stealing action sequence with the machine gun cyborg and her clever-as-fuck strategy to blow him up with lipstick. Throughout this movie, Yor's desire to be a part of Loid's and Anya's lives was front and center.

I'm not a fan of the whole Yor thinks Loid is cheating subplot where it felt less in keeping with her usual MO of not understanding the "normal" social nuances and more like the writers fed her stupid pills because Loid was about to overdose, probably. But it was resolved fairly quickly and easily, and at the end of the day, that was not the focus of Yor's storyline in the movie. (And probably was shoehorned into the story to create a reason to include Yor's coworkers in the movie.)

Anya is adorable, as usual, but where usually Spy Family lets Anya be the one surreptitiously finding a way to save her family, in this movie, she was the liability and the damsel. I'm not opposed to such a scenario in general. I do feel that in canon Anya has too much on her shoulders, and even if her parents don't realize the degree of it, I'd love a storyline where Anya gets to be the one saved.

This was not that, but Anya does get to be protected, and even if I have a lot of issues with the details of how it was done, I figure this deserves a shout out.

Concluding Thoughts

If I liked this movie a little more, I would say I ought to see it one more time before refining my thoughts.

I still love Spy Family, enough so that even after seeing this abysmal movie, I am happy about the free stickers I got with my ticket, and opted for the Spy Family themed theater membership card.

But oh boy, this movie rubbed me so very much the wrong way that I have no wish to subject myself to it again.

Also, this isn't important, but was the ending implying that the south of Ostania has an ocean? Given how much canon parallels Ostania and Westalia to East and West Germany, I found this bizarre and it made me feel that the writers of the movie have very little understanding of the source material (well, more than I already did, since that is at the end of the movie, at which point there was already no salvaging my take).

Basically...this movie was Not It.

Don't spend money on it unless it's for the art.

#spy x family #spy family #spy x family code white #spy family code white #spoilers #loid forger #yor briar #yor forger #anya forger #movie rant

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