#sometimes i think ive got to get off tumblr bcus my brain will convince me that thinhs are my fault

[narutomaki]

really going through it because for some reason my brain is being so much more of an asshole recently

even if I've never done something I'm convinced I've done it and must somehow make up for having done it which idk is thay a victim complex? I've always jokingly said I've had one but I've had like. delusions (??) that tidal waves and hurricanes and earthquakes are my fault for being happy/alive since I was like. 12.

and they've like shrunk/gone away in recent years but now I'm convinced global warming is my fault because I have an air purifier and used to smoke.

this is how I feel about my mental health lmao

#are they delusions? am i actually mentally ill? is it all actually my fault and everyone is trying to be nice to me by saying its not? 🤢 #vent #mental health #sometimes i think ive got to get off tumblr bcus my brain will convince me that thinhs are my fault #because im white #and im.not talking about minor racism that i benefit from and dont see and may accidentky perpertuate #i mean my brain says because im white its my fault that past tragedies have happened 🤪 #because i wasnt alive/aware to personally 100% by my own hand stop them. #like. do u see what i mean #do i have problems? yes. do the circles i run in sometimes perpetuate arguments that make those problems flare up #by giving them arguments based in social justice that i cant just brush off without having to check and argue w myself? #any way like my psychs have said theres nothing wrong with me that they can diagnose except ptsd and axiety and depression #🧍‍♂️ are you sure about that. #i GET that psychiatric diagnoses are meaningless but also i would like a label so i know im notnjust supposed to feel this way