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ravenbrenna09 · 4 years

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hold me close - comfort

Title: hold me close

Square Filled: comfort

Ship: Sander Driesen and Robbe IJzermans

Trigger Warnings (if applicable):

Created for @skamevents

...

This is my work for the comfort square of the BINGO card. I know it’s been a while since I’ve managed to complete one of these (the Friends with Benefit prompt in my drafts is screaming), but my recent battle with my own stress in terms of my math test(s) managed to manifest itself into Robbe being stressed about a math test so *shrugs*. But, I hope you guys enjoy!

(don’t worry, it’s only 2k words)

AO3

...

Robbe had been eerily quiet all day. He hadn’t even responded to Sander’s message about how his test had gone today.

Sander knew that his boyfriend was studying for his upcoming finals. When he focused on schoolwork and especially on studying, he always tended to be silent anyway. But, Sander had a feeling that crawled beneath his skin and made his stomach sink. With every short text back, his stomach only continued to sink further in the pit of his stomach and his brain was focused on Robbe, not on the piece in front of him. By the time that lunch had hit and Robbe had only responded to him briefly, Sander was worried. Robbe always threw himself too far into his studying tactics and Sander knew the toll that it took on him.

Pulling out his phone, sitting across from Noor in the café, he saw that Robbe hadn’t responded and his fingers moved to his chat with Jens, the one that he rarely used, and he sent him a text.

Sander: Is Robbe okay?

It didn’t take long to respond.

Jens: He’s definitely stressed. He went home after today’s test to study some more.

Jens: He’s got his math test tomorrow, I think.

Sander: Okay, I just haven’t heard from him.

Sander: How did your tests go?

Jens: Mine went okay. And, don’t worry. I’m sure he’s just studying.

But, he was worried.

Especially since his math test was tomorrow.

In their late-night calls, in which Sander would spend the majority of the time either drawing Robbe or trying to convince him to sleep, Robbe had mentioned that this math exam was on Thursday and how nervous he was for it. Even between all of his other studying, he would stop working on whatever subject and switch to math. When the problem wasn’t behaving like he wanted to, he would get frustrated and upset and all Sander could do was watch from another side of the screen, try to calm him down and remind him that he needed to take a step back.

Sander: Are we still meeting for a little bit after class?

When Sander had checked his phone, before the start of his final class for the day, he saw that his message hadn’t been read. As soon as his final class had dismissed them, Sander was already half-packed up, portfolio under his arm, and out of the room without hesitation. Normally, he hung around and talked to his professor or the model, sometimes until Robbe would come in and pull him out. But, Robbe wasn’t standing out in the hallway and his bike wasn’t locked up in their place.

Without thinking, just worried about him, his feet took him in the direction of Robbe’s apartment. It wasn’t far from his school, maybe a little out of his way to his house, and he was halfway up the stairs to the building when he nearly ran over Robbe’s mom, who was headed out of the building and ruffling through her purse, in his haste to make sure Robbe wasn’t pushing himself. The woman was dressed for work, or maybe she had just gotten home from work, her long brown curls pulled up in a ponytail, and she beamed up with him in a smile that Robbe had inherited.

“Sander!” the woman spoke cheerily. “Robbe’s up in his room. He’s studying for his test. Are you staying long? I’m going to the store and then I’ll make us all dinner!”

“I don’t know,” Sander admitted, feeling anxious and restless to get to Robbe. “But, dinner sounds wonderful.”

“Okay, well, you know where the spare key is. I’ll be back soon.”

Then, the woman was gone, turning the bend to the store, and Sander was racing across the lobby to the stairs, taking them two-at-a-time. The IJzermans apartment was on the second floor, right by the stairs. As soon as Sander reached the door, the brass 26 shining on the front, he fished out the spare key from the garden pot outside the door, where he had put it the last time he was over, and opened the front door with ease.

His eyes lingered on the familiar surroundings of Robbe’s brown jacket on the hook, his tennis shoes on the floor beneath it, and his keys on the table. Sander toed off his black converse, his eyes darting down the hallway to Robbe’s open room, and placed his portfolio on the floor beside it. As he shrugged off the lightweight jacket that he had worn in place of his leather jacket, moving to hang it beside Robbe’s, he heard the floorboards creak beneath his weight and Robbe say, “Mama? Did you forget something?”

Robbe stepped out into the hallway, running a hand through his messy hair, and Sander felt his heart break a little.

His boyfriend’s eyes were tired and worn. Even beneath the green hoodie that hung on his shoulders and the sweats that he was wearing, he could see that Robbe’s shoulders were slumped and stiff. His entire body seemed on edge and his eyes darted across Sander’s entire face and form as he questioned, his voice displaying the tiredness that he felt, “Sander? What are you doing here?” Before Sander could say anything or move to wrap his arms around him, he saw the realization in Robbe’s brown eyes and he let out a string of curses, running his hands over his face, “We were supposed to meet up.”

“Robbe,” Sander spoke, stepping forward.

“I’m sorry,” Robbe continued hurriedly, his words partially slurring together as he made a beeline into his bedroom. Like a moth drawn to a flame, Sander followed him, trying to reach out to touch him but Robbe was a step ahead, moving in the direction of his desk where his phone was. “I’ve been studying and I didn’t check the time and-”

“Robbe, you don’t have to apologize,” Sander cut off, stepping forward to hold him in his arms. He wrapped his arms around Robbe’s shoulders, pulling him back against his chest. Robbe let out a sigh, leaning back into his embrace as his head tilted down to look at his phone. From his spot over his shoulder, Sander could see the names of the texts that he had missed and he could feel Robbe get tense beneath his arms. “Baby,” Sander spoke, leaning his cheek against Robbe’s shoulder.

“Hmm?”

“You need to take a break.”

“I can’t,” Robbe spoke, dropping his phone down on the desk. It landed on a binder, sliding down until it hit the floor (and thankfully didn’t shatter), but neither one of them moved to pick it up. Robbe moved to his desk, his right hand moving through his notes at a frantic pace, but his other hand moved to overlap with Sander’s hand on his shoulder, gripping onto Sander’s long fingers tightly. “I still have so many notes to look through. Plus, I still need to do the practice problems from three sections and that’s not even counting the review problems I should look back over.”

“Robbe.”

“And, I have to at least look over the midterms at some point,” Robbe continued, his eyes darting all over the desk in front of him. Sander stepped forward, so their bodies were flushed together, and he could feel Robbe’s body momentarily relax. “He tends to repeat problems so looking over the midterms will help me when he pulls a problem similar to that on the final.”

“Robbe,” Sander whispered. “How long have you been studying?”

“Since I got home.”

“Which was?”

“Uh, around 11, I think,” Robbe admitted.

“Baby, it’s past 16:00,” Sander spoke. “You need to take a break or you’re going to overwork that beautiful brain of yours.”

“But, I can’t stop, Sander!” Robbe spoke, his voice louder. He flinched out of Sander’s arms, his shoulders shaking as he leaned over the desk. His hands gripped tightly onto the edge of the desk, his knuckles turning bone white. Trying to give Robbe the space that he needed, he took a step back but he ran a hand across Robbe’s back, trying to soothe him, trying to offer him some method of comfort. “I can’t stop. I feel like I haven’t learned anything and I can’t remember what to do so I need to study.”

“No,” Sander whispered, running a hand across his back. “You need to take a break.”

“Sander,” Robbe spoke, turning towards him. There were tears prickling the corners of his eyes, tears of frustration, and Sander nearly started weeping at the sight. Robbe was one of the smartest people that Sander had ever known, but to see him doubting himself so drastically, to see him pushing himself so hard that his brain was shutting down, hurt his heart. Robbe continued, his words streaming together, broken and wet, “I can’t stop studying because I don’t understand what’s going on. Every time I look at the page, I feel like I’m finding something else that I don’t understand. It’s like I haven’t seen it before! And, I have a test tomorrow morning and I need to do good or I’m not going to pass. At the very least, I need to memorize the formulas so I can use them-”

Robbe cut himself off, a sob ripping through his body. The tears slipped past the rim of his eyes, slipping across his cheekbones and down his jaw. Robbe squeezed his eyes shut, trying to hold the rest of them back, to stop himself from crying completely, but Sander stepped forward again, cupping the back of his head and pulling the smaller boy flush against him.

As soon as Sander’s arms were wrapped tightly around him, another sob was ripped from Robbe’s mouth, his tears starting fresh again, soaking the fabric of his t-shirt. Robbe buried his face into Sander’s shoulder, trying to muffle the sound of his own cries and sputters as Sander tried to soothe him, clinging to the back of Robbe’s head. Robbe’s hands moved to the back of Sander’s t-shirt, gripping it tightly in his hands. He rubbed patterns against the fabric of Robbe’s hoodie, pressed soothing kisses against his jaw and neck, wiped away the tear streaks he could reach, and held him tighter.

“Get it all out,” Sander whispered, pressing a kiss against his ear.

“I feel like an idiot,” Robbe cried.

“You’re not an idiot, Robbe,” Sander spoke, his voice a little too firm. He leaned back, taking Robbe’s face in his hands, wiping his thumbs across his cheeks to catch the remaining tears that fell from his cheeks. His boyfriend stared up at him with eyes that were half-closed in tears, his bottom lip trembling. “Your brain is just screaming at you that it’s tired and that you need to give it a break. You’re the most beautiful and smartest man that I’ve ever seen.”

“I bet not like this,” Robbe mumbled, reaching up to rub his eyes.

“Always,” Sander whispered. “You’re so smart, Robbe. And you know the material. But, if you overload your brain while you’re so tired, you are going to forget important stuff tomorrow. Your body is screaming at you that it needs a break and you need to listen to it.”

“You’re right,” the smaller boy whispered, leaning forward to press their foreheads together and his brown eyes shutting automatically. Sander wrapped his arms tighter around Robbe, running his hands down his back before tilting them in the direction of the bed. Robbe followed his directions willingly, his arms reaching up to wrap around Sander’s shoulders. Then, the back of his knees hit the bed and they both went tumbling onto the mattress, a light laugh knocked out of Robbe. “What’s your plan?” the brunet whispered, his lips turning up in a grin.

Sander grinned down at him, rolling off of him. Robbe shifted to him, scooting closer to him and grabbing onto his waist to pull Sander’s form closer. Sander chuckled at him, leaning back against one of Robbe’s pillows before turning to him. “We’re going to take a break,” he answered, reaching up to run a hand through Robbe’s hair, freshly cut and short again. Robbe tilted his head back before leaning into Sander’s touch. “For the next hour, until your mom comes back from the grocery store, we’re just going to lie here and not think about homework, okay?”

“Okay,” Robbe mumbled, his eyelids already closing. “And if I go to sleep?”

“Then, you go to sleep,” Sander whispered. “You’ve got this, Robbe. I know you do.” Robbe’s eyes opened again to stare up at him. “You’ve done so much studying over the past few weeks and your body is screaming at you for a break. If you go to sleep, it’s because your brain needs to recharge. When you wake up, you’ll be refreshed and have a little more energy and if you think that you need to study some more, you can study some more.”

“Can you stay the night?” Robbe whispered.

“Yes,” Sander replied, smiling down at him. “If you want me to, I’ll always stay the night.”

Robbe smiled up at him before tilting his chin up, a silent message that Sander knew by heart. The blond ducked his head down, pressing their lips together in a slow kiss. Robbe tilted his head to the side so their lips flushed together more smoothly, pulling him closer by his waist. Sander pushed his mouth open with his lips, slipping his tongue into his mouth, cupping the back of his head. Robbe let out a content sigh, pulling back and burying his face in the crook of Sander’s neck.

“Get some sleep,” Sander whispered, running a hand through his hair. Robbe let out a content sigh against his next. “You can always study more when you wake up, but you need to stop overloading yourself, baby.”

“Alright,” Robbe whispered, his lips ghosting across Sander’s skin. His boyfriend snaked his arms around his torso, bringing them closer together, their bodies and legs intertwined. Sander pulled him closer, one arm wrapped around his shoulders, his hand dropping to Robbe’s thigh to hold him there.

By the time that Marine IJzermans had returned home, peering around the corner with two bags around her wrist, Robbe had snuggled further into Sander’s chest, still holding onto the black-fabric of his t-shirt. There was a small smile that appeared on his mother’s face as she placed the bag outside of Robbe’s door and stepped inside to check. She smiled down at Sander, who was absentmindedly running a hand through Robbe’s tangled curls, and whispered to him, “Dinner will be ready in about an hour if you want to sleep as well.”

“Thank you,” Sander replied.

“I assume that you’ll be spending the night as well.”

“Yeah,” Sander spoke, “but only if that’s alright with you.”

“Of course,” Marine spoke, reaching down to rub Robbe’s shoulder. “He always seems to be more relaxed with you around. But, the door remains open, okay?” Sander grinned, nodding his head, feeling the blush begin to move to his cheeks. The woman bent down, placing a kiss against Robbe’s head before moving out of the room, collecting the bag and headed into the kitchen, leaving the two of them alone.

#wtfock #wtfam #wtfock fanfic #skamevents #skamevents bingo #square: comfort #sander comforts robbe #sander driesen #robbe ijzermans #stressed af robbe #sobbe #rosander #sobbe fic #rosander fic #one shot #2k words

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fockinglevendcliche · 4 years

Text

Title: It’s just a jacket.

Square Filled: Sharing clothes

Ship: Robbe IJzermans / Sander Driesen

Trigger Warnings (if applicable): None

Created for @skamevents

Had to give this one a try as well. Don’t expect this to be totally canon. It’s just a little thing, but I hope you enjoy this!! 😊

—-

Robbe said goodbye to his friends, heading out of school. Behind him, the boys were still shouting provocations, laughing loudly. Robbe just raised his hand, giving them the middle finger before going through the front door. He didn’t understand what was going on with them. Their constant jokes had continued since Robbe had arrived that morning at school. And they just couldn’t shut up about it. And all of that because of a jacket. A damn jacket. Robbe just shook his head, leaving it behind. It wasn’t worth it.

Besides, he was in a hurry to get back home, back to the comfort of his boyfriend’s arms who was probably still sleeping in his bed.

It had been hard for Robbe to leave his house this morning. Even more, when Sander continued to drag him by his hand back to the bed, gently grabbing him around his waist, holding him in his warm arms. And it didn’t help that Robbe didn’t feel like leaving him either, especially when Sander was being so needy.

Luckily for him, the blond boy had stayed up late finishing a sketch of one of his drawings, so he fell asleep again quickly, giving Robbe a way out to escape his strong grip. After that, Robbe had hurried as fast as he could, even if it didn’t help him get to his first lesson in time.

At least, for Robbe’s own happiness, it was Wednesday. And that meant he’d get out of classes earlier, and since Sander’s classes had been canceled for that day, he’d be able to spend the rest of the day with his boyfriend, just relaxing in the quiet of his room. And that’s why Robbe was in a hurry. Well, that and the fact that he wanted to get away from his friends as soon as possible. Even more, when they still hadn’t stopped with the loud laughter.

Robbe passed the front door, being immediately confronted with the image of his boyfriend, just standing there in front of him, with the biggest smile on his face as he faced the brunet back. Robbe was ready to open his mouth when Sander quickly approached him, placing his hands on his waist, pulling him for a quick, brief kiss.

“What are you doing here?” Robbe asked as soon as Sander separated his lips from his, “You didn’t have classes today, you could have slept some more.“

"I wanted to come pick you up,” Sander replied, adding with his head tilted a little to the side, “Guess who had to come here with only a shirt, in this cold?"

The brunet looked at him shyly, his eyes wide open. Robbe really thought Sander would still be sleeping in his bed when he got home. And that’s why he took his black leather jacket that morning. Sander wouldn’t need it anyway. Robbe could just wear it and put it back in the same place as soon as he got home. He didn’t think the older boy would come pick him up from school. Besides, Robbe didn’t want him to know why he’d brought his jacket. Of course, they often shared clothes between them, it was nothing unusual. When they would spend the night at each other’s house, when they would both go out on freezing nights and Sander always had to pass this same jacket over Robbe’s shoulders, even if he insisted every time that he wasn’t that cold. But never to school. And especially, when Robbe had only done it so that he wouldn’t miss Sander so much, his smell filling up his whole body. And that sounded ridiculous, even in Robbe’s mind. They’d seen each other just that morning after spending the whole night together. And as soon as Robbe finished his classes, he’d go right back to Sander. It wasn’t like they didn’t see each other all the time. But even so, Robbe couldn’t deny the way he needed him. Even if most days they just spent a few short hours away from each other. He loved having Sander around all the time, no matter how cheesy that sounded.

Robbe stared at Sander again, asking in a soft tone of voice, "I’m sorry. Are you upset with me?"

The blond boy finally let out a playful smile, pulling Robbe back into his arms, leaving a small kiss on his cheek.

"Why would I be upset?"

Robbe shrugged his shoulders quickly, passing his arms around Sander’s neck, hugging him back, "I don’t know. I probably shouldn’t pick up your stuff without telling you."

"Robbe, what–,” the blond boy interrupted himself, bringing his hand that was resting on Robbe’s waist to his face, stroking his cheek gently with his thumb, “You know you can always pick up my stuff,” he stopped talking, bringing his lips slowly to the brunet’s ear, whispering softly, “Besides, you look really good in my clothes."

Robbe stared at Sander with his big doe-eyes, smiling at him innocently, "You think so? Jens said it didn’t look good on me."

A provocative smile popped into Robbe’s lips as soon as he mentioned Jens. Ever since he’d admitted to Sander liking his best friend in the past, the blond boy had started staring at Jens with a defiant look every time he and Robbe were too close to each other. Not in a possessive way, Sander wasn’t like that. Just a look that sort of told Jens that he didn’t stand a chance anyway.

Sander cleared his throat, strinking back with confidence, "Good. I didn't really want anyone else checking on you."

Robbe just giggled. Even though he didn’t admit it, he liked it when Sander acted protectively with him.

The brunet let his hands go up from Sander’s neck to his face, touching his lower lip gently with his fingers. Robbe immediately felt the blond boy’s cold skin against his warm, making his own body shiver.

"You’re cold,” Robbe said, covering Sander’s cheeks with his hands, trying to warm him up as best he could, “You could have just taken one of my jackets."

Sander just shook his head repeatedly, a laugh slipping out of his mouth.

"Oh right,” Robbe added, teasing him, “it wouldn’t go well with your… whole look."

The brunet smiled to himself, proud of his own comment.

"Whatever,” Sander said, changing the subject quickly, “Why did you even bring this jacket? It’s really cold, you could have just brought my hoodie, it’d have kept you warmer."

Robbe stared at him shyly. He knew Sander was right. That jacket didn’t really warm him in the least. But it smelled like Sander and that was all Robbe needed. He couldn’t even care about the cold at all. But he knew that the older boy was persistent. And he couldn’t escape that question, even if he wanted to.

"Because you didn’t wear the hoodie yesterday,” the words came out hurriedly from Robbe’s lips, “But you wore this jacket."

Robbe didn’t lose the way Sander looked at him with a confused expression on his face, waiting for the brunet to say something more. Something that would make sense.

Robbe sighed heavily, adding, "This smells like you."

He tilted his head up to face the familiar pair of green eyes, being confronted by Sander’s gaze fixed on his. His eyes no longer looked confused. In reality, they were filled with warmth and… desire.

Robbe shifted his weight from one foot to another, nervously. Fuck, they were right in front of his school. Sander needed to stop looking at him that way. At least, while they were standing there.

"Can we go now?” Robbe asked, feeling the heat that was already beginning to appear on his cheeks. He didn’t need to look at himself to know that his face must already be flushed.

Lucky for him, Sander took one of his hands to Robbe’s, intertwining their fingers together, starting to drag the brunet out of there.

“Yeah, let’s go home."

Robbe felt his chest immediately filling with so much love. Home. Because it was true. Home was where any one of them was.

#skambingo #skamevents #wtfock #robbe x sander #sharing clothes

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hopetofantasy · 4 years

Text

Wandering Romance

- A future with child fic -

Square Filled: Future, Family, Past lovers Ship: Sander Driesen/Robbe Ijzermans Trigger Warnings (if applicable): none applied. Created for @skamevents Summary: “A perfect, tight little family. But happy. Until one unfortunate day in May, in the year that David turned six.”

In the future, Robbe and Sander have a son named David. The only tie they have left with each other, actually. Because our lovers split up years ago, due to mistakes that were made in the past.

So is their love strong enough to sustain a healthy friendship? Will they find their way to each other again or break all connections for good?

Also available on AO3

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CHAPTER 2: 'No one sees what I see in you’

—————————————————————

“So this is it then?”

A beautiful boy with mesmerizing eyes lying in arms. The warmth of love. It felt like puzzle pieces finally fitting together, after months of frustration and searching for anything that might look like it. Something that had been missing for quite some time. It just didn’t add up? Long sighs, hurtful eyes, loaded silences that made them more sad than happy. Their love wasn’t strong enough to deal with this...

No, he didn’t believe that.

They were strong enough.

Just not now...

He was caressing the cheek of his lover, his best friend, his partner in crime. Another part of the pair, the amazing family they had. Fathers. Their boy. All tossed away, like it was nothing. A paper crumbled in the trash. Like they never even were. And because of what? Why? Why now? Why this? This wasn’t right. They both knew it wasn’t.

He sighed to stop the spiraling.

His hands started to clench into a fist. He was so angry at first, he was so angry and sad at the world. He was promised forever, they both promised each other that their love would survive anything. The perfect man in a beautiful white suit and him wearing the black one. Ying and yang. Always complimenting each other, begging for a deeper connection, receiving it and now cutting it away.

Like his heart.

“Is this it? Can’t we keep trying? Please?”

His eyes were staring inside those deep ones. His tanned skinned hand slightly caressing his lover’s arm. Mindlessly. They were used to pillow talk until the early morning, the sunrise. The night sky turning from dark blue to light orange hues, exactly the color he once made by accident, trying out the paint samples on his palette. A beautiful coincidence. Just like the night they met.

As if faith knew.

When the other boy didn’t answer, he just went for it. His lips trying to convey everything he felt inside the troubled mind, his hands feeling every hitched breath taken away from his other half, the softness of a wanted caress, but also the sting from nails digging in his back, the bite of pleasure, the strained movement of legs - as if love couldn’t be felt without some pain. It suited them, he thought. Every day could be a high. Every day could be a low.

His fingers gripped the sheets of their shared bed. Sharing it for the last time.

“Oh my god, schat”, exclaimed the one.

“I love you”, answered the other.

“I love you too”, was moaned.

“Don’t leave me, please”, was said.

A tear rolling off a heated cheek.

Kissed by soft eyelashes.

The silence that followed wasn’t wounding. It was passion, it was love, it was a high that never experienced a low. A white light behind the eyes. Stars for their lights. Something shared only between them. And never would be again.

“Let us go... please”

The whisper.

And that’s when Sander woke up from his dream.

When he started to cry.

-^-

“Papa, can I ask you something?”

“Yes, darling, always. What is it?”

“How did you and paps meet?”

Oof, that was such a loaded question for a Monday morning. And he didn’t even have his first coffee yet. His eyes instantly analyzed David’s face, which was just a pure reflection of playfulness and wonder. The tiny boy seemed to concoct something on his breakfast croissant. It looked like choco spread, decorated with speculaas cookies.

What is this? Where the hell did he get that idea? This can’t be healthy right?

“Sweetie, did you eat a hearty sandwich before shoving this in your mouth? You can’t live on sweets, you know that. You won’t grow to be a big boy, then!”

“But, papa, I like it. Can I have this, like... one time?”

Oh no, not the puppy eyes.

He was a real manipulator with those big brown orbs. The kid was 9 years old, for God’s sake, how could he be this smart? He knew exactly how to play the game to convince them of mischievous things, things that were bad for him and stuff they needed to say ‘no’ to. But it was sooo rewarding to just say ‘yes’. Just to see the beautiful grin creep up onto the face he loved so much.

Something Sander wanted to collect in a jar and pull out whenever he had his ‘cloudy days’. David didn’t understand the concept of bipolarity yet, so once he was old enough to notice something, they had sat him down to explain. “David, sweetie. You know how papa is sometimes a bit different?”, Robbe tried to approach the subject, while their son stared with unsung tears in his eyes.

“Yeah, he lies on the bed and sleeps and don’t eat and is very, very sad. I don’t understand. Does papa hate me? Did I do something wrong? I’m sorry...”

If the room was a stethoscope, the family would’ve heard a heart breaking. It was one thing that Robbe had to deal with his mania and depression. Now another innocent soul was being corrupted by his stupid brain and Sander just couldn’t deal with that. The pain he might induce, the worry in his soul almost growing too much. But as always, his other half seemed to know what to do. While holding his hand, to anchor him back to this world, Robbe explained.

“No, darling. Papa will always love you. Even if you did bad things. But now you didn’t do anything wrong, okay? You see, people have a bright sun inside them. And sometimes that happy, beautiful sun will have clouds blocking their light. Clouds who bring in bad weather, like being tired, not being hungry, not wanting to talk, have sad thoughts, just wanting to sleep all the time. And that’s okay. Because after a few days of rain, comes the sunshine, right?”

“And sometimes a rainbow!”, their beautiful boy exclaimed.

A couple of teeth missing in the front, but his smile was beaming nonetheless. It melted their hearts. “Yes,” Sander whispered softly. If he wasn’t sure about how much he loved his curly angels before, he knew now. When did he become so lucky to have such beautiful love? Him and his loving partner hugging their soft boy, giggling all together, without a care in the world. A fulfilling life.

Perfection.

“Papa, are you there?”

Sander blinked back some tears, while trying to focus on the situation at hand. David was glaring at him, already halfway through the disgustingly sweet croissant in his hands. Some crumbs were falling down the plate. And the choco paste tainting his pink cheeks. The look in his face was peculiar, like he tried to figure out what his dad was thinking. If he was going ‘cloudy’.

“David... I do remember that I never told you ‘yes’, right?”

The answer was a simple shrug.

“You didn’t answer my question about paps, either. C’est la vie.”

To say that Sander was perplexed, is an serious understatement.

-^-

When Sander was thirteen, he knew.

He wasn’t normal.

This was way before he was diagnosed with bipolarity, but that wasn’t the only thing not fitting the ‘standard normal’. He knew the boys in his class and he simply didn’t like them. They were all talking about video games, Call Of Duty: Black Ops, while eating their weight in greasy snacks and referring to girls like pieces of meat. Making jokes about what they learned from their older siblings or watching too much nighttime television.

And he didn’t.

He liked to write, he wanted to be a writer someday. And paint. Drawing was amazing. Sander loved walking around with cut jeans, graphic band t-shirts and a bleached buzzcut. One day, he’d love to have a pierced eyebrow. That was considered cool in his book. Maybe his career would be ‘rock-and-roll’ artist, since he played the drums too. Something to get his energy out.

Because he had ADHD.

At least, that’s what his doctor said. He just wanted different things than others and sometimes all at once. Was that weird? Apparently so. But he wasn’t entirely convinced about having the disorder. It sounded ill-fitting. Like a shrunken skinny jeans in the dryer, the broken mug in his room where he put his discarded pencils. It didn’t make sense.

Because he was who he was.

He liked who he was.

But who was he exactly?

He knew the day he changed schools. His mom somehow knew, the way only mothers do, that the previous school wasn’t the right fit for him. His course orientation was ‘sciences’ and he almost failed everyone of his classes. Sander was struggling to keep afloat. Almost drowning at the formulas and facts and figures. Those were more abstract to him than art. Art made sense, somehow?

And that’s why his mom send him to an art school.

There he saw people with asymmetric hair, nose rings and cut t-shirts. Girls with alluring auras, rainbow shoes and paint covered arms. Boys with mesmerizing eyes, fresh make-up and decorated backpacks. Beautiful souls who talked about art like breathing. Who understood things like writer’s block, portrait frustration and tunnel vision.

And he fell in love with them, all of them.

His people.

It took him a few years to understand what else made him special. Because he did fall in love with people’s souls, their auras, instead of a specific gender. It was a highlight in his life when he figured that one out. He finally knew another piece of the puzzle. Life was complicated, but knowing something more about yourself, made it so much easier.

His first crush was on a dark skinned boy from his drawing class. He didn’t reciprocate feelings, but liked Sander as a friend. Ekon appreciated the way Sander caught him in his art pieces. Complimented him on how he perfectly attained his off-beat smile, when someone made a joke at his expense. He was a quiet boy. But a boy, nonetheless.

And then there was Saartje. An unconventional girl, even for an art school. She seemed to walk around like an ice queen surrounded by raging fires. Hated every thing he suggested to lift her sculptures to a new level, always answering his comments with a cold stare. Such a soft girly name for such a raging bitch.

And Sander couldn’t help but fall.

Hard.

Without parachute.

But she used that to her advantage.

His love was treated as an exchange. If Sander would shut up about his newest passion called David Bowie, she’d give him a kiss. When he asked her on a date, she would think about it. Maybe if Sander could persuade the teacher to give her a better grade? And if he paid? Being the hormonal teenager he was, he obliged. And he believed. He was tricked into uncertain love.

Something he carried with him.

Especially after his eventual diagnosis. He dated Britt. He thought he deserved this kind of love. The uncertainty, the doubt, the hardships. It was all his brain’s fault, for being the way he was. Love? Love was something to be earned, not to be given. And nobody would give that up so easily for someone as broken as him.

Until that one boy,

in the moonlight.

He never saw true beauty ‘til this night.

And his heart,

did love as true again.

-^-

“Do you want any help with that?”

“Papa, I know how to make myself look like Bowie, you know.”

Sander snorted. He was truly a son of his, wasn’t he? This tiny boy was sitting on a high chair, right in front of a mirror, attempting to put on the make-up in a dramatic way. The tip of his tongue spilling out his lips, trying very hard to focus. He couldn’t stop staring at this sight, which filled him with pride. He must have taught him well.

The next generation was secured.

“Dad, stop staring at me and go find my other dad.”, David said sternly.

Ok, but who was the parent in this relationship exactly? Sometimes Sander didn't know. Yet, catching the eye of the supervisor right behind him, he was sure that everything was going to be a-okay. Maybe he did needed to find Robbe and the boys. It’ll do him some good. It had been ages since they had some real interaction that wasn’t through a phone.

It wasn’t difficult to spot them through the crowd of curious adults. The exaggerated screaming at each other was enough. Robbe had been pulled into the biggest hug by Milan, flanked by a jumping Moyo, giggling Aaron and a serious Jens. It sounded like the weirdest end of the world. But the feeling that coursed through his heart wasn’t unusual.

Pride.

For what they all achieved.

How they all stayed together.

Through hell and back.

Moyo had, somehow, become a successful club owner of a couple of nightlife establishments all around the city. From an only-known-by-initiates speakeasy to a high paid, high-end sky club, he knew what he wanted to do with his life and brought it to the table. Jens, on the other hand, went on a totally different route. After failing to start a few start-ups, he became g a video editing/sound mix freelancer and stay-at-home dad to help his lawyer-wife.

Aaron was still on the grind as a social worker, working until late at night to fight for the hardest cases. “These people deserve a happy ending”, he’d always say. And Sander couldn’t agree more.

Last but not least, Milan. The interior designer with an ecological mind. He had helped them out with the decoration of their home, which was totally picture perfect. And still cheap as f.

After the whole ordeal of greeting, Robbe seemed to have a huge smile plastered on his face. That was good, Sander though. Lately he looked so lost, certainly in Sander’s neighborhood. And he didn’t know why. As far as he knew, he didn’t say or do anything wrong. On the contrary. He’d encouraged Robbe to bring Wouter along, saying it was totally okay to find love again.

Where was that bastard, anyways?

“Heeeeeey, Jack Frost!”, the entire group turned towards him and engulfed him into an instant hug. Causing a lot of high pitched giggling, ‘omg, your hand is on my butt’-s and eye rolls. The warmth next to him was familiar, though. As was the scent. Which made his heart drum a little harder, like it wasn’t stating the obvious already. Pulling away, the electrified gaze lingered.

“How are you?”, the one asked.

“I’m good.”, the other answered.

He wanted to know more. Sander always wanted to know more. His heart never stopped beating for this boy, so everything he would say, would be engraved in his soul. His broken mind. His eternal love. That would never change. Even through the pain, he knew that they belonged together. That it was neither fault. Life just happened.

Like always.

But before he could ask anything else, a woman approached the brown haired man. Some colorful glasses, a beautiful classic dress and an intrigued smile on her face. Robbe immediately greeted her as ‘Mrs. Raymaeckers’. “I saw David backstage. Are you ready to see the performance, Mr. Ijzermans?”, she politely asked. Robbe slowly nodded his head with a careful smile.

“Ofcourse, David is going to be amazing, he was bouncing off the walls about this. I’m interested in what he’s going to play...”

“Ah yes. The David Bowie thing. He’s truly special, isn’t he? Unique in some ways.”, she giggled, while wrapping her hand around his arm. Causing a lot of heads unsubtly turning towards the gesture.

“I love how he has such a playful spirit. Does he have that from his father or his mother?”. She blinked rapidly. Auburn hair tossed over her shoulder. A beaming smile.

Wait...

Was she...

Trying to flirt with him?

A potential married man?

Sander saw how the other boys desperately held in their laughs. Some of them failed. Robbe’s cheeks reddened slightly, like he didn’t know how to answer this delicate question.

She just assumed he was straight?

That was such heteronormativity.

It irked the beach blonde man, that people could still think this way, like a child couldn’t have two fathers or mothers?

“He has that from me, actually.”

Six pairs of eyes bore into his. Most of them applauding the ballsy move on his part, one of them grateful for this way out. The last one, however, went through a whole process.

Confusion, calculation, realization and shame.

“Oh... I’m sorry.”, Mrs. Raymaeckers sheepishly stated. "I didn’t know. I just assumed... Ahem. Well, I’m gonna check the rest. Bye, Mr Ijzermans. Bye, Mr-”

“Driesen.”, he answered coldly.

“Bye, Mr. Driesen.” And with that, she was gone. As fast as the wind.

He didn’t like it.

He just didn’t.

How people could still think the way they did, how they would just come up to potential married men and flirt with them? How was that okay?

He knew he was clenching his fist, because of the pain. Fingernails making tiny half moons. It stung. Jealousy and anger tasting like poison in his mouth. His stare trying to find a fixated spot to calm his breathing.

He found it in some deep brown eyes.

A cautious smile coming towards him. He knew. Robbe always knew what Sander needed, even when he didn’t know himself. He was intuitive that way. His beautiful man, such a perfect human. The father of his child. And he couldn’t help, but sigh. Breathing slowly, heart thumping. A small caress around his fist, trying to soften the harsh ache. Only making the ache in his heart greater.

“Robbe”, he whispered silently.

“Yeah, Sander?”

He didn’t say anything more. He couldn’t. Robbe needed to live his own life, making his own mistakes, battle his own prejudices. Feeling his own real love. So Sander just stood there. Looking at the face he adored the most and he started to notice something. It almost looked like Robbe was anticipating this, was waiting for some kind of answer, some kind of truth.

And that's when they heard it.

A David Bowie lookalike coming onto the stage.

Childlike coughing in the microphone.

The first notes of a guitar riff.

The scratchy start of ‘doodoodoo''.

The song.

David Bowie.

The sign.

“You've got your mother in a whirl She's not sure if you're a boy or a girl Hey babe, your hair's alright Hey babe, let's go out tonight You like me, and I like it all We like dancing and we look divine You love bands when they're playing hard You want more and you want it fast They put you down, they say I'm wrong You tacky thing, you put them on.

Rebel rebel, you've torn your dress Rebel rebel, your face is a mess Rebel rebel, how could they know? Hot tramp, I love you so!”

#wtfock #wtfam #skambingo #skamevents #part 2 of 4

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teen-content-queen · 4 years

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Title: I love you

Square Filled: New P.O.V. (Hugo and Alejandro are soft and in love)

Ship: Viri x Hugo / Nora x Alejandro

Trigger Warnings (if applicable): None

Created for @skamevents

Read it on AO3

Hugo grabbed Viri’s hand, stumbling as she pulled him along the stone pathway. Her blonde curls bobbed as she walked ahead, nearly dragging him now. She was in a rush, seeing as they were late to the party. It was her fault really, for why they were late, Hugo mused. If she hadn’t been so pretty when he’d arrived at her place, he wouldn’t have had to stop to kiss her for so long under the trees by the park.

She turned back, giving him a smile, the kind that made her nose scrunch up, still pulling at his hand. He felt his heart flutter in his chest as he stumbled forward, letting her pull him towards the open door, classmates and friends spilling out and onto the street.

“Viri!” Cris screamed, a full bottle in one hand and her arm around Joana when they walked inside, pushing past a few groups of drunk friends and lovers who were blocking up the entryway with no interest in moving out of the flow of traffic.

Viri and Hugo were quickly engulfed by the couple, Amira hanging behind to swoop in for her turn once Cris had sufficiently covered Viri in kisses. Waiting, Amira gave Hugo a high five and a nod, then gestured towards the other end of the room, where a bar had been set up. Beside it was Dilan, Jorge, and Eva and Hugo could tell Dilan was telling them a story, arms outstretched and eyes wide. Eva and Jorge were laughing at him, comfortably nestled into each other’s sides. Jorge had his arm around her waist and Hugo caught him planting a small kiss on her forehead before Jorge turned his attention to Dilan again.

Hugo turned to Viri.

“Drink?”

She nodded, kissing him on the cheek and finally releasing his hand as she turned back to the girls. Hugo smiled and cut through the mass of people to get to the drinks and to his friends. Dilan saw him first, and stopped whatever he was saying to call his name. As he got closer, he was enveloped in hugs and then promptly handed a beer.

“How’s it going?”

Hugo nodded and looked over to where Viri was standing, talking animatedly to her friends. He turned back to the group.

“It’s really good.”

Dilan gave him his signature smile and then launched back into his story, one Hugo had already heard about Dilan’s weird neighbors. He stood with them for a while, talking and laughing, before retrieving a fresh beer and a drink for Viri. He nodded towards the girls and then held up Viri’s drink, excusing himself. Eva gave Jorge a kiss and grabbed her own drink, following Hugo back over to her friends.

Hugo slid an arm around Viri’s shoulder, laughing a little as she jumped in surprise, handing her the drink and leaning down to kiss her forehead.

“Just me.” He said.

She laughed.

“You were gone so long, I thought maybe you weren’t coming back.” She teased.

“Me? Leave you? Never.” He said, kissing her forehead again.

Alejandro loved riding his bike through Madrid. He loved the way the air whipped past him, loved how everything else blurred away but the road ahead, loved that he couldn’t hear himself think too much over the roar of the engine. He hadn’t even let himself imagine how much better it would be with Nora along for the ride.

But here they were, her arms wrapped tight around his stomach, holding herself in place. The first few times he’d convinced her to go for a ride with him, her arms had wound around him so tight it had been almost hard to breathe. Now, she’d relaxed into it, hold on him firm but not constrictive. He tried not to think how that paralleled her approach to their whole relationship too. But that thought didn’t have long to fester anyway. As Alejandro took the last turn, they could just make out the sound of the party ahead, dim but audible over the roar of the bike.

Content with his parking, Alejandro pulled off his helmet, wiping the hair that had gotten stuck down to his forehead and running a hand through it to push his dark strands out of his eyes.

Nora watched him, already picture perfect, her cherry red helmet waiting on the seat of the bike. She lifted her own hand, running her fingers through his hair and patting down the spots that had gotten messy under the helmet. She smiled at him, nearly eye level with him for a change as he leaned against the bike.

She let her fingers drift from his hair to his face, running her soft fingers along his cheekbones and sending a shiver down Alejandro’s spine. She stepped closer to him now, leaning in and letting him close the distance for a sweet kiss.

“How was the ride?” He asked, like he always did.

“Pretty.” Nora said simply, lazily locking their fingers together between them.

“Shall we go in?”

Nora looked towards the entrance, and Alejandro saw Viri and Hugo just as they disappeared into the house. Nora turned back to him and nodded.

“In a minute.” She said, smiling again and leaning in for another kiss, this one longer and deeper than the last.

Hugo and Viri walked home the long way, hands linked between them, laughing and smiling at each other while Hugo told Viri the story about Dilan’s neighbor. For all of his theatrics, Dilan kept getting distracted and had started but never finished his story. Viri was laughing hard now, and Hugo once again felt the familiar rush in his chest that he got whenever he was responsible for putting a smile on her face. He knew, better than anyone, how Viri could hide her true feelings from the world and he’d become a master of distinguishing her fake smiles from her real ones. This was a real one. He leaned down, kissing her.

“What was that for?” She asked, eyes wide on him when he pulled back.

“I love you.” Hugo said.

He hadn’t realized until the words were out of his mouth what he was saying. They’d never said those words out loud to each other. Viri stared at him for a moment, smile gone. Hugo waited, watching her for any sign of what she was thinking. Finally, she whispered,

“I love you too.”

Hugo could feel his own smile creeping onto his face, and he wasted no time pulling in Viri for another kiss.

Alejandro sat beside Nora, watching the street in front of them, his bike parked in its usual spot outside her house. He’d only meant to walk her to the front door and then go home, but somehow, an hour later, here he was, sitting with her while she told him about Joana’s new job and Amira’s upcoming event that they were all going to. She asked if he’d be there and he nodded. Alejandro knew by now that he’d go wherever Nora asked him to.

They sat in comfortable silence, Alejandro’s arm around Nora’s shoulder and her head on his chest, breath rustling the light material of his t-shirt.

“Tonight was fun.” Nora said, voice getting slow. He could tell she was getting tired.

“Every night with you is fun Nora.” He said, quietly. It was cheesy but he meant it.

He felt her shift under him and lifted his arm so she could adjust. Instead, she sat up, keeping their faces close as she smiled up at him.

“Even when I make you study English?”

“Even then.” He assured her, kissing the tip of her nose.

She looked up at him, still smiling and the words tumbled out before he could stop them.

“I love you.”

Nora just smiled wider.

“I love you too.”

And then she kissed him again.

#skamevents #skam españa #viri x hugo #virgo #Nora x alejandro #norando

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dreamy-slytherin · 4 years

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CLOUDS

Title: Clouds

Square filled: Crackship

Ship: Jens Stoffels/Sander Driesen

Trigger warnings: Some homophobic comments

Created for: @skamevents

Basically the beach house week all over again with the small twist of making Jens and Sander fall in love. Both of them are single and both of them are super queer, so that's gonna be fun. Jens comes out to Robbe in this one and thinks about kissing Sander A LOT.

Read it on ao3

#don't kill me please I am a small child #skambingo #skamevents #sans #jens x sander #wtfock #wtfam #crackship #jens stoffels #sander driesen

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alwaysin-myhead · 3 years

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Some of you may have already seen, but I made this banner for @skamevents next event: SKAM HOLIDAY EVENT🎄 enjoy!

#skamholidayevent #skam #wtfock #druck #skam nl #skam italia #skam españa #skam france #skam austin #my art

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shame-in-flemish · 3 years

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@skamevents Skam Holiday Event: Dec. 24th | Day 5: Parties - Friendmas Party ✨

#skamholidayevent #christmas #moodboard #aesthetic board #wtfock #wtfockedit #zoe loockx #yasmina ait omar #robbe ijzermans #sander driesen #noor bauwens #milan hendrickx #shameinflemish

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all-things-skam · 3 years

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Special ornaments

Summary: Nora adds a new ornament to her Christmas tree

Written For: @skamevents Holiday event

Pairing: Nora x Josh (Spiderwitz)

Theme: Decorations

''It's almost seven, shall we go?''

Josh glanced down at his cosy looking girlfriend in his arms. He didn't want to disturb her, looking like could fall asleep if she stayed there ten more minutes, but they had planned to go to the Christmas market and the clock was ticking.

''No,'' Nora whined as he detached himself from her, sitting up. ''I was comfy here.''

''If we wait too long, there'll be too many people. Come on.'' He stood and extended his hand to Nora, pulling her out of bed.

She let him pull her up half way before go of his hand and falling back on her bed with a laugh.

''Nora...'' he sighed with a smile, faking to be annoyed.

''It's cold out. Aren't we good here? We could watch a movie? Fatou told me about this one on Netflix.''

''You said we'd go tonight. Do you not want to anymore?''

It was okay if she had changed her mind. It happens. And Josh wanted Nora to know that. He didn’t want to force her to do some things just because she once agreed to. They can change their plan.

She shook her head. ''No. I still want to go,'' she assured. ''I just need to mentally prepare myself for the cold weather.''

Josh let out a small snicker at the blonde's ridiculousness, but nodded. ‘’Okay.’’ He grabbed his dark blue hoodie from the back of the wooden chair and slipped it on over his head. ‘’It’s a cute tree,’’ Josh pointed out, catching sight of the small Christmas tree on Nora’s desk right where a picture frame of her mom and sisters stood. ‘’A bit busted, but cute.’’

She stood and laughed softly, agreeing to the statement. The tree was in fact old and slightly crooked from that one time Zoe had knocked it off. ‘’Thanks. I’ve had it since I was little. Each ornament represents my sisters. Mom gave it to me.’’

Kiki was the angel with fluffy feathers. As the eldest, she is like a second mom to her sisters. She protects, watches over them, brings guidance when needed and will always be there for them.

Zoe was the golden sun. Just like the sun, she brings joy and a smile on people's faces. It also shines the brightest in the sky and is sometimes blinded by her own rays or outshine others without meaning to.

And, lastly, Nora was the sparkly ballerina. Since she was young, she always loved dancing. But, also, ballerinas are delicate at first glance, yet so strong as Nora had proved this year. They fall too...and that's okay, because they always get back up and that's what matters.

Josh smiled as she told them the meaning of each of them. He didn’t know Nora’s sisters too well, but he knew she was close to them and suddenly felt like he knew them better now. ‘’What ornament would I be?’’

Nora pursed her lips and paused, thinking thoroughly. ‘’A Spiderman,’’ she concluded.

‘’A Spiderman.’’

‘’Yes.''

A short laugh left Josh’s lips. ''Everyone has deep meanings and I get a Spiderman? I get that I do parkour, but come on, Nora. You can find something better.''

She shook her head, snaking her arms around the back of his neck. ‘’No. I stand by what I said. You’re a Spiderman. Nora smiled before closing the gap between them.

The next time Zoe sister's bedroom, she noticed a new ornament on her tree.

''What's this?'' she asked, pointing to the red figure.

''Spiderman,'' Nora responded in a 'duh' tone.

Zoe rolled her eyes. ''I know. But, why is there a Spiderman into your Christmas tree?''

''Josh gave it to me.''

#skamholidayevent #decorations #spiderwitz #josh x nora #druck #josh zimmermann #nora machwitz

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fille-lioncelle · 4 years

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SKAM (and remakes) Bingo 2020 Masterpost

Thank you all for bearing with me as I speed-ran through this yesterday. And thank you to @skamevents for organising it.

And without further ado, here are my fills, organised by promt:

“birthday” Isak/Even. G. 360 words. for @thegirlnooneknows5 Isak and Even celebrate Even’s 20th.

“break-up” former Hanna/Jonas, backgroun Matteo/David. Hanna, Matteo, David friendship. G. 370 words. Hanna breaks up with Jonas.

“traveling” Matteo/David. G. 2k. space royalty AU. David meets Prince Matteo at his sister Laura’s wedding.

“long distance” Matteo/David. 520 words. G. space royalty AU. David and Prince Matteo are dating - but they spend most of their time planets away from each other.

“friendship” Sana&Vilde. russ. G. 340 words. for anon. Sana and Vilde plan a bus, and they get quite into it.

“new POV” Isak/Even. G. 100 words. for anon. outside POV of them moving into a new flat.

“crossover” Cris/Joana, Matteo/David. PG. 420 words. Joana and Cris scroll through David’s instagram account.

“soulmates, past lovers, re-written scene” Lucas/Eliott. G. 500 words. reincarnation AU. Eliott bumps into Lucas and remembers him.

“past” David/Matteo. PG. 900 words. vampire AU. David ruminates on their past and present.

“holiday, date” Isak/Even. G. 290 words. for @ghostcat3000 who wanted a minor holiday and @nofeartina who is an angel and suggested a street festival Isak and Even spend some time at the centennial of their street.

“drunk, sharing clothes” Noora/Eva. teen for alcohol? 1k. Eva washes herself and her clothes.

“family, meeting the family” Isak/Even. G. parents meet the parents. 600 words. Isak and Even move in together and their parents meet for the first time.

“friends with benefits” Isak&Christoffer. G. 100 words. These are not the benefits people usually mean.

“future” Matteo/David. G. 420 words. David thinks about the future.

“coffeeshop AU, friends to lovers” Matteo/David. G. 1.5k. for @alone-incrowds David is a barista, Matteo is his friend and customer. Can I make it any more obvious?

“comfort” Isak/Even. G. 500 words. space AU for @irazor. Isak and Even are researchers on a space station/remote planet.

“crack ship” Hans/Jonas. G. 270 words. Hans doesn’t have a crush on Jonas.

“fear” Lucas/Eliott. teen for implied off screen sexy times. 270 words. Lucas and Eliott move in together.

... and that’s all she wrote, folks!

#fic masterpost #masterpost #i fic sometimes #druck fic #skam fic #skam france fic #skam espana fic #skambingo #i'm gonna archive these on AO3 but not all at once and probably not today lol

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skamevents · 3 years

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The Holiday Event is almost here!! Only two weeks left 🤗✨

Who’s participating?

#skamevents #skamholidayevent #skam #druck #wtfock #skam france #skam españa #skam italia #skam nl #sobbe #elu #evak #van der stoffels #zoenne #davenzi

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peaceoutofthepieces · 4 years

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Title: Polaroid Memories

Square Filled: Family, Friendship, Birthday

Pairing: Jens Stoffels/Lucas VDH

Trigger Warnings: None

Created for @skamevents

because I wanted to share my birthday with my favourite boy and our little vds nation <3

~^~

Lucas wakes up slow.

It’s something he’s becoming more and more familiar. His mind wakes before his body does, slowly processing his surroundings long before he opens his eyes. He wakes up surrounded in warmth, with a tingle shooting down his spine. There are lips on his cheek, moving down his neck, and strong, insistent hands splayed over his ribs, and he melts even further into the mattress.

The hands roll Lucas onto his back, towards the warm chest behind him, as the lips find their way back to his cheek and then eventually his own, greeting him with a soft peck. Lucas chases it, lips finally twitching in a smile, and hears a low, throaty laugh that has his eyes flicking open.

Jens rewards him with a grin and another kiss, deep and lingering, trailing more feathery pecks along his cheek before stopping to nip at his ear. “Good morning.”

Lucas hums tiredly in response, arching into the other boy as Jens’s hands slip down his sides. Jens smiles against his skin, rolling to hover over him as Lucas trails his fingers up his back to thread them into his hair. Jens kisses him again, his weight pressing him into the mattress, and Lucas allows himself to melt, going boneless underneath him. Even when Jens pulls away, it’s only to immediately reattach his lips to Lucas’s skin, peppering sweet kisses all over his face. It leaves Lucas humming again, pleased.

“Nice wake up call,” he murmurs simply.

Jens pushes himself up just enough to get Lucas opening his eyes, patient as Jens wiggles his brows at him. “I hope you know to expect better than that.”

Lucas grins, letting his eyes fall shut again as Jens softly kisses his cheek. The kisses turn firmer, blazing, as Jens makes his way down Lucas’s chest and hooks his fingers in the waistband of his boxers.

It’s only when Lucas is breathless and sated, feeling half-asleep again and flexing his fingers free of their tight grip in the other’s hair, that Jens nuzzles his way back up and plants a smacking kiss on his cheek with a cheery, “Happy birthday.”

~^~

Lucas never really liked his birthday.

At least, never more than any other day. He only remembers vague patches of it from when he was younger, when his parents were still happily married and remembered to buy him cake and gifts and everything else. That lasted until he was around ten, when his mother’s episodes started becoming impossible to ignore, and Lucas found himself more often than not making her dinner on his birthday. He didn’t blame her at all, of course, but he did blame his father for a number of things. If he hadn’t been so ignorant and avoidant of his wife and his only son, she would have gotten her diagnosis and been treated much earlier, and maybe Lucas would have had birthday parties he could actually remember.

He doesn’t hate his birthday, or anything, but it’s not a day that stands out, either.

But it is different now. Now that he’s older, and living in Antwerp, in a flat with his boyfriend of two years with a much larger friend group. Now is different.

Or at least, the morning is, until Jens climbs over his lap at the kitchen table and gives him an apologetic pout. “I shouldn’t have to work on your birthday. It sucks.”

Lucas is already wrapping his arms around his waist, pulling him closer to tuck his face into his shoulder as he smiles. “Yeah, it sucks.”

“I am genuinely upset and you are turning every word into an innuendo.”

“Well, who’s fault is it that my mind has been on that path all morning?”

Jens sighs, mock aggrieved as he pets a hand through Lucas’s hair. “The answer to that better be me.”

Lucas laughs, lifting his head to pull Jens down and into a kiss. “Always you,” he mumbles.

At least birthday kisses are a regular thing now, he thinks. He can very much get used to birthday kisses.

Jens gives him a hundred in apology before he leaves, tracing his lips over every still-exposed piece of skin, comforting and loving and teasing all at once. In the end it’s Lucas forcing him out the door with a multitude of reassurances, unable to stave off one last kiss as Jens promises to make up for it, assuring him he’ll be back in the evening. Lucas, again, tells him it’s fine, because it is.

He doesn’t hate his birthday. But he doesn’t really like the loneliness that usually seeps in along with it.

It doesn’t matter, though, this year. It’s different. He has people around him who make it different. He has Jens. He can manage the loneliness for a few hours in the face of that, with the promise of what’s to come.

~^~

Only, he isn’t even alone for an hour when there’s a knock on the door, and he has to distractedly look up from his sketch and wait to hear it again before it registers. Then he’s bounding off the seat and into the hallway, speed-walking to the door and pulling it up without even checking the peephole.

He’s instantly engulfed in a bone-crushing hug, seconds before he’s greeted with, “Fuck, I missed you.”

“Kes,” he returns, surprised, ecstatic, wrapping his arms tightly around him in return. “What are you doing here?”

“Don’t be fucking stupid,” Kes says, happy. “Happy birthday.”

“Happy birthday,” another voice interrupts, even more excited than Kes had been, and Lucas laughs as Jayden pushes in through the doorway to wrap his arms around them both.

Kes makes a short sound of protest, but wiggles his arm out to wrap around Jayden when Lucas does the same. He is surprised, but he supposes he shouldn’t be, supposes he should expect a gift like this at the very least. He only wonders how long they’ve been planning it, if he was meant to be left in the dark, if it was spontaneous or a given. Last year had been different, when Lucas was still living in Utrecht and it had been his eighteenth, when Jens and the Broerrrs had been the ones that had to get on a train and come join him. They’d thrown him a party, then, not at all secretly enough, and he’d enjoyed it.

Now, living in Antwerp, and turning no particularly special age, he hadn’t expected it to be like that. He’d expected maybe a bar trip with the boys, at the very most, and would have been content with a quiet night in with Jens. But he can’t deny that he’s pleased at having Kes and Jayden turn up his doorstep, almost relieved to see his best friends.

“How did you even get here?” Lucas asks, just as they finally break their little huddle and he catches sight of Sander in the hallway. The older boy grins in confirmation, giving a quick nod, and Lucas smiles widely in response.

“Mr Grownup here was kind enough to meet us at the station,” Kes answers, reaching behind him to pull Sander in the neck, who shoves him away with a huff. “Well, well, kind might not be the right word.”

Sander gives a long-suffering sigh and turns a serious gaze on Lucas. “Bickering, the whole time. Really, the things I do for you Luc.”

Lucas doesn’t bother pointing out the short ten minute driving distance from the station, because he understands that ten minutes is more than enough. Instead he grins wider and reaches out to give Sander’s shoulder a grateful squeeze, tugging him further inside as he finally shuts the door. Kes and Jayden are already making their way to the sitting room, bags now slung over their shoulders. Sander lingers and waits for Lucas, then falls into step easily alongside him as they follow.

He stops, however, in the doorway to the sitting room, watching Jayden drop his bag and flop onto the sofa in amusement. Lucas turns to him with a frown, realisation sinking in. “You’re not staying.”

Sander shakes his head, and raises his hand to jingle his keys. “Have another pick up to do. I’d say you get half an hour with these guys and then the rest want to see you. So, I’m not staying, but you won’t have to miss me too long.”

Lucas rolls his eyes and punches his shoulder lightly, and Sander laughs, skipping out of the way. “Just go get your boyfriend before you make a fool of yourself.”

Sander waves him off with a smile, turning back towards the room to call a very pointed, “You’re welcome.”

The two dumbasses turn to him, Jayden from where he’s sprawled face down on the sofa and Kes from his perch on top of the other’s thighs. “Thanks, Sander,” they call back, genuine but still filtering off into laughter as Kes tips sideways and accidentally digs his elbow into Jayden’s back.

Sander simply shakes his head, amused, and ruffles Lucas’s hair before heading back down the hallway, calling a goodbye over his shoulder.

Lucas is left to turn back to his friends, just as Jayden is bucking his hips in an attempt to throw Kes off. Kes concedes, sliding to the opposite end of the sofa and letting Jayden pull his legs out from under him, shifting until he’s sat cross-legged and smiling at Lucas. He smiles back as they watch him, until eventually Kes raises his brows and pats the space beside him.

Once Lucas has sat down, Kes is turning to Jayden with raised brows. “Do you have it?”

Jayden blinks at him, lips parting. “I thought you were packing it.”

Lucas bites back a laugh as Kes’s expression instantly drops, eyes narrowing as a scowl forms on his lips. “I told you to bring it!”

“If you were literally talking about it why did you not bring it?”

“Because I was in the shower!”

“Well maybe I was distracted, then.”

Kes tosses his hands up and Lucas does laugh now, as Jayden finally cracks and lets his lips pull up in a smile, a small giggle bubbling out of him as well. He punches Kes’s shoulder, much harder than Lucas had with Sander, and Kes winces away as his scowl deepens.

“Such little faith in me,” Jayden complains, hoisting his bag onto his lap and digging through it. “Always so quick to believe I’ll let you down.”

Kes grimaces, shoulders slumping in instant apology as Jayden produces a tiny wrapped gift from his bag. “You were fucking with me,” Kes sighs.

Jayden passes the package to Lucas before wiggling his brows and smacking a kiss to Kes’s cheek. “I’m always fucking with you.”

Kes rolls his eyes, but smiles, and Lucas mock gags, and only smiles when Kes smacks the back of his head. It’s weird, the whole thing. The Kes and Jayden thing. He supposes it’s made it worse, him not being there. He hadn’t really had a chance to watch it develop, hadn’t been able to catch on until he’d already missed months worth of change. He also hadn’t been there to get used to it, only witnessing this new dynamic in their visits back and forth.

And yeah, it’s weird.

But it’s not so weird that it isn’t manageable. In fact, sometimes Lucas almost forgets. They’re both tactile, naturally affectionate, but private in that way they all sometimes get in public. Lucas...well, honestly, Lucas isn’t really sure what their relationship is like. He just knows his friends are happy, and they’re still his best friends, and he can’t really make too much fun of them without getting it heaped on him in return.

Kes hooks an arm around his neck now and jostles him, gesturing at the tiny gift still in his hands and saying, “Open it.”

Lucas doesn’t have to be told twice, curiosity consuming him as he tears at the sparkly wrapping paper. It’s more difficult than expected, the entire small square covered in tape, but eventually he manages to pull a side free. He grins as a small bag of weed slips out, catching it in his palm and tipping his head back.

“I fucking love you guys,” he admits, and Kes and Jayden both laugh and comply as he holds his hand out for a fist bump.

Jayden winks. “To give you and Jensy-boy a little birthday boost.” He wiggles his brows once more, whining in pain as Kes elbows him in the gut.

Lucas simply wiggles his brows back. This time Kes supplies the mock gag. Jayden gives him a high-five.

“How did you manage to plan this, anyway?” Lucas asks later, wedged between his two friends now as they share a joint. Jayden fiddles with the curls at the back of Lucas’s head with his feet drawn up on the cushion as Kes leans back with his leg strewn over Lucas’s.

“What do you mean?” Kes tilts his head.

“I mean, getting here, Sander picking you up, the gift…”

Kes and Jayden share a glance before shrugging and simply stating, “Jens.”

“We just messaged him and he helped us out. And Isa will watch Oscar literally whenever we ask. Think she likes his company,” Jayden says.

“Think he likes her more than me,” Kes mumbles.

Jayden makes a noise of protest, patting Kes’s leg comfortingly. “That’s not true. Isa just gives the best belly scratches. With you he just gets jealous.”

“Don’t think he’s the only one,” Lucas smiles, and Kes flicks the side of his head. “Seriously, though. I’m glad you guys are here.”

“Where else would we be?” Kes jostles his head. “We’d never miss a chance to celebrate our baby bro.”

Lucas’s smile widens. His parents stopped being good at even remembering his birthday a long time ago—but Kes was still always there. Kes has always been family, and with him came Isa and Jayden and even their broader group, Liv and Noah and Ralph and the girls. They’d all taken Lucas in at some stage, all welcomed him like family.

They’re more than enough.

~^~

“Okay, bro, I know it looks like we didn’t get you anything, but I swear we’re better than that,” Moyo promises, ten minutes into their group meeting at the skatepark.

“Which is why we’re going to the cafe after and buying you a whole cake. Whatever one you want,” Aaron says, just as earnestly, and Lucas barely holds back a snort.

“You guys don’t have to get me anything, really.”

“Yes, they do, or they don’t get shit from Jens on their birthdays,” Robbe teases, leaving both boys to turn and scowl at him, unable to do much more through the protective barrier of Sander’s arms.

“And what did you get him?” Moyo scoffs

Robbe rolls his eyes, patting Sander’s hands where they clasped on top of his chest. “Sander and I got him an awesome birthday gift. Which we’ll be able to give him if you two get off your asses and go join Kes and Jayden.”

“Lucas doesn’t think anything is better than cake,” Aaron argues, looking to Lucas for confirmation, who simply draws his shoulders up to his ears in a cheeky shrug.

“Well there is that thing Jens does—“

“No, nope, no way,” Moyo smacks a hand over his mouth, shaking his head as Sander and Robbe laugh and Aaron looks on in confusion. “I love you, man, but for the sake of my sanity and ability to look either of you in the eye ever again, please don’t finish that sentence.”

Lucas doesn’t, but he does lick Moyo’s hand.

Moyo curses and snaps his hand away, smacking the back of Lucas’s head for good measure before jogging off down the half pipe. Aaron follows him, thankfully without any more questions, and Lucas is left with the most sickening couple in Antwerp—who also happen to be his two best friends here.

Robbe detached himself from Sander and moves to sit next to Lucas, giving his boyfriend a nod as Sander gets to his feet and moves back to the tree where they’d dumped their bags. “This is kinda more from Sander than me,” Robbe admits. “Idea and payment wise. So you should direct any thanks you have there.”

“I’m already thankful, Robbe,” Lucas says quietly. “It’s not,” he cuts himself off, tries starting again. He gestures at their friends across the park, laughing and falling more than they are skating and watches Robbe follow his gaze. “This, more than anything, I’m thankful for. I mean it when I say you didn’t have to get me anything.”

“And we mean it when we tell you we wanted to,” Robbe shrugs, offering him a gentle smile. He looks down at his feet, choosing his next words with care. “I kind of hated my birthday, for a while. It was the one day my parents would try to pretend everything wasn’t falling apart, and that I actually factored into any of what was happening. It usually still ended up with them screaming at each other. It made it...seem more like an inconvenience than something to celebrate.”

He turns his head to look up at Lucas again, squinting under the glare of the sun. “I know we’re not exactly the same, but,” he offers a small shrug, “I don’t think we’re that different?”

Lucas swallows down the lump in his throat and nods, bumping his shoulder against Robbe’s. Robbe nods back and adds, “So I get what you mean. I love celebrating with Mama, when she’s capable, but...it’s dumb things like Sander making me breakfast that make it better. It just depends so much on the people around you and you have so many good people, Lucas. It’s like, your friends are your family. You know?”

Lucas can only nod again, blinking quickly as he looks down at his own lap and Robbe passes an arm around his shoulder, pulling him to his side for a brief moment. Lucas huffs a quiet, grateful laugh at the gesture, smiling back when Robbe looks at him and gives his shoulder another squeeze.

“Jens was always a big part of making my birthday better, too,” Robbe adds, smile turning teasing. “So I’m sure with you…” he trails off suggestively.

Lucas shoves his shoulder, heart softening at the giggles he receives in return, and then Sander’s back. He drops down on Lucas’s other side, meeting his boyfriend’s eyes for a brief, questioning second. Lucas understands the quiet communication, realises why it had taken him so long to go the few feet and return.

Sander seemingly got whatever he was looking for, however, presenting Lucas with a package that is notably larger than the one he’d received earlier in the day. Lucas shoots a questioning glance between them before eagerly pulling the wrapping off at their nods, expression brightening as he catches sight of the contents.

“No way,” Lucas says, awed, now holding the object with a much firmer grip. “A fucking Polaroid?”

He doesn’t know which boy to look at, glancing between both his friends rapidly as he takes it in. There’s a pleased, almost smug tilt to Robbe’s lips now, but he shakes his head at Lucas’s questioning gaze and nods proudly at Sander. “Like I said, all his idea.”

Lucas whips his grin to Sander, who doesn’t look as grateful for the credit as he should. His tongue is poking at his cheek, a habit Lucas has noticed, something he does when he’s unsure of himself. “I remember when you were looking at them in the shop and telling me how cool it would be, because you never learned to develop but these were easy, but I knew you’d never buy it for yourself, so. It’s not the best brand, but—“

Lucas cuts him off by throwing his arms around his neck in a hug, after passing the boxed camera over to Robbe’s careful hands. “It’s perfect, Sander,” he assures, pulling back with a tug to his dark hair. “Thank you.”

Sander’s shoulders lose their tension instantly, dropping in relief as he sports a content smile.

Lucas takes the box back from Robbe and examines it more closely. “Do you think it’s safe enough to open here, or do I have to wait?”

“If we move back and sit with out stuff until you get it going, it should be safe enough,” Sander reassures. “There’s film and everything with it, ready to go.”

Lucas is hopping up before he’s even finished, muttering a happy, “Okay.” He grins eagerly at them until they stand and join him, Sander seeming to share his excitement as Robbe gives another gentle laugh.

“I’ll leave you to the technical stuff and go make sure the others don’t die before you can get pictures of it,” Robbe says.

“It’d be much appreciated,” Lucas agrees, managing the solemn tone for only a moment with his face too eager to express his joy. He and Sander get settled down under the shade of the tree, and Sander helps him gently peel back the bits of tape until he can get the camera out.

“I can’t believe you got me this,” Lucas mumbles. “Even if it’s not the ‘best brand’. I didn’t expect anything this expensive.”

“It’s not about the expense,” Sander shrugs. “It doesn’t put me out much, especially with Robbe chipping in. I know you’d try to get me something I wanted, even if it was going to leave you struggling, so this is nothing.”

“It’s far from nothing, Sander. I didn’t even realise how much I wanted one of these. But you did,” he points out. “That’s...a lot.”

Sander shrugs again. Lucas isn’t sure he’s ever seen him look so bashful. “I know that you’ll have everyone giving you things today and your best friends are here and they probably know you better than I do, but...I thought it was important to give you something to help you remember all of it. It’s a lot of the reason I draw and take pictures when I get—well. When I go into overdrive. It’s harder to remember things, sometimes. I know that’s not a problem for you in the same way, obviously, but you do love to capture things and I thought this kind of fit even Jens’s vibe best and it just seemed like the right idea.”

There’s an immense pressure in Lucas’s chest that he can’t get rid of, an overflow of emotion that had been there since Robbe had started to speaking to him and now threatens to boil over. He can’t help but think how right Robbe is. He doesn’t know how he’s gotten so lucky, to have so many good people in his life. To be able to consider so many of his friends close enough to be family.

Sander seems to grow more nervous the longer he stays silent, so he reaches out and places a careful hand on his arm. “It’s a brilliant idea. You know me just as well as anyone, if not better, obviously.”

It does the trick, Sander’s expression instantly softening back into a smile, still somewhat oddly shy. “Well, you probably are my best friend,” Ssnder says simply. Stating a fact.

Lucas swallows down another lump in his throat and moves to hug him again.

~^~

He really shouldn’t be surprised when he returns to the flat and finds it suspiciously dark, especially with Kes and Jayden giggling behind him. The others had all ditched them a while ago, Robbe and Sander disappearing first and Moyo and Aaron following not long after, making sure Lucas got every last bit of his cake.

He really shouldn’t be surprised when he flicks the light on and is gifted with people jumping out from nowhere, yelling an almost simultaneous, “Surpirse!”

Kes and Jayden are also cheering behind him, pushing him forward as he laughs and his eyes make their way naturally to Jens, standing at the front of the room with a massive grin on his face. Lucas feels that usual tug towards him, feels himself being drawn easily into his orbit. Only, a force collides with his chest and holds him back, arms wrapping tightly around his chest as curls tickle his chin.

“Happy birthday Luc,” Isa croons, squeezing him happily, and Lucas feels the bubble of elation in his chest grow as he hugs her back.

“Thank you. What are you doing here? Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”

Isa steps back to roll her eyes up at him, shaking him by the shoulders. “Well obviously, Luc, that would’ve ruined the surprise!”

Lucas grins at her, suddenly feeling bashful himself. His friends squeeze past him and he distantly hears Jayden squeal, “Jens!” He huffs a laugh as he watches the collision over Isa’s shoulder, catching sight of the girls and Milan and the boys, all back again. None of them are paying too much attention, letting him have his moment with Isa.

He looks back down at her and his eyes widen as a sudden thought kicks in. “Isa, Oscar! You’re supposed to be taking care of him.”

“Obviously that was a lie, Luc. Liv and Noah have him. I needed some reason for not showing up with Kes and Jayden so I could sneak in here and set this up.”

Lucas blinks. “You set this up?”

Isa hums, smiling. “The decorations, yeah. Along with the girls and Milan, of course. Engel and Janna would’ve come, too, but Janna’s gone all week and Engel’s mom wasn’t too sure of the idea.”

“And Liv and Noah are dog-sitting,” Lucas grins. He doesn’t have to say he doesn’t mind, knowing Isa already knows. That he’s very happy his three best friends made the time for him, even with this new distance. It reminds him that no one’s really gone anywhere, that they’re still in his corner and any thoughts of losing them were ridiculous. He couldn’t get rid of them if he tried.

Isa nods, smile turning cheeky, a trait the two of them have always shared. “But you have a lot of people here for you. Your very adorable boyfriend made sure of that.”

Lucas flushes, shoving her shoulder lightly as his eyes automatically trail around the room, finally catching on Jens. He’s still caught up in a conversation with Kes and Jayden, nodding along as Kes waves his hands around animatedly. He must notice Lucas’s gaze, however, casting around for him before finally meeting his eyes. His lips turn up in an easy smile, and he gives Lucas a small wave, and Lucas’s heart stutters stupidly in his chest. As if it isn’t used to Jens by now. As if Jens has never done far more to get his heart racing.

He’s dragged out of his awe when Isa pinches his cheek, cooing at him again as he bats her away. She laughs, catching his hand to squeeze it fondly. “Go, put him out of his misery. He’s been rushing around for the past hour since he got back, as if we didn’t have everything ready for him,” she rolls her eyes, but her tone and smile are both still fond, and she pulls Lucas into another hug before letting him go. “I’m happy for you, Luc. We’ll catch up properly later, okay?”

He nods at her and she pats his cheek, running off ahead of him to draw Kes and Jayden away, leaving Jens standing alone with an amused grin lighting up his face. He turns to Lucas slowly, expression softening as he takes him in, and Lucas finally moves towards him.

Jens immediately envelopes him in his arms and presses a kiss to the top of his head, and this is exactly what Lucas has been waiting for all day. Just this.

“What made you think I’d want a surprise party?” Lucas asks, voice muffled where his face is tucked into Jens’s shoulder.

Jens hums, swaying Lucas slightly side to side. “I don’t know, maybe the fact that you like surprises, and parties, and me…”

“Oh and you’re the main event at this thing then, is that it?”

“Luc, I am always the main event,” Jens says, lifting his hands to Lucas’s shoulders and gently pushing him back enough to kiss him. His lips are still brushing Lucas’s as he speaks, voice low and teasing. “But only for you.”

Lucas hums, pulling Jens down by his grip on his neck, drawing him into another slow kiss as Jens’s hands smooth over his back. “Thank you,” Lucas murmurs.

Jens smiles, sneaks a kiss to his cheek. “Always.”

Before Lucas can fall into him completely, there are a set of hands on his own shoulders, dragging him away from his boyfriend even as he protests, his own hands clenched in the collar of Jens’s shirt. Milan carefully plucks them away and steps in between them, smiling politely even as he gives Lucas a little shove.

“Your lovely boyfriend isn’t going anywhere, but you have friends waiting to hug you and gifts waiting to be opened,” Milan says, seemingly genuinely apologetic.

Lucas groans, but greets Milan with a kiss on the cheek before letting himself be led around the room.

~^~

He’s exhausted by the time everyone leaves, dead on his feet in the kitchen as he empties the abandoned bottles of alcohol. He rubs at his eyes as arms slip around his waist from behind and a soft kiss is placed on the side of his neck. A smile takes over his face as he leans back into Jens’s warmth, tempted to turn around and curl into his hold and never move.

“You shouldn’t be cleaning up, it’s your birthday,” Jens admonishes, taking the bottle from his grip and placing it on the counter. “I’ll do it tomorrow. It’ll be fine until then.”

Lucas hums, debating only for a few seconds before he gives in with a nod. He turns in his boyfriend’s hold to wind his arms around his neck, resting against his chest as he closes his eyes and lets out a tired breath. Jens hugs him for a moment, cupping the back of his head and keeping him close.

“Did you have a good day?” Jens asks quietly.

“Mmhm,” Lucas assures, smile spreading back over his face. “The best day.”

Jens huffs, chest shaking with silent laughter as he draws back and leads Lucas out of the room. “Okay, bedtime.”

Lucas is maybe, kinda, a little tipsy. And probably slightly high. But he knows these minor factors aren’t the source of his happiness. That it’s more to do with Kes and Jayden sprawled together on the pull-out sofa, already snoring lightly and completely forgoing the blankets Jens had left out for them. Isa had also been offered a spot, but she’d declined in favour of staying with Jana, who had an actual spare room to offer her. The rest of his friends had filtered out slowly through the night, Yasmina being the first to disappear with a sweet kiss to his cheek and Robbe and Sander being the last to linger, helping them make the place somewhat less of a mess. Or at least, they’d tried to, even as Robbe and Jens got distracted messing around with the streamers and Lucas had proudly been presenting his blurry polaroids to Sander.

“Do you think we’ll have to buy a new sofa now?” Lucas sniffs, glancing suspiciously back over his shoulder at his friends’ still forms.

Jens bites his lip to muffle his laugh. “No, I think the sofa will be okay.”

Lucas hums. “Okay. That’s good.”

He pauses in the doorway to their bedroom, leaving Jens to bump into his back as his eyes train on the bowl in the center of the bed.

“Jens,” Lucas whispers.

“Luc.”

“Why is there a dog bowl on our bed? Is this some kind of kink thing?”

Jens doesn’t bother muffling his laughter this time, and Lucas smiles as he rings it loud and unabashed next to his ear. Jens shakes his head and nudges him into the room until he can close the door behind them, pursing his lips in amusement as he turns Lucas to face him. “No. It’s not a kink thing. It’s entirely innocent, I promise.”

Lucas’s eyes widen. “You better not be fucking with me.”

“I didn’t get one,” Jens says quickly. “Because even though I wanted it to be a surprise, it’s ours, and I want you to have a say. Which is why I got a size and gender neutral bowl for now until I can take you to the shelter tomorrow.”

Lucas presses his hands to his cheeks, smushing them until his lips are ridiculously puckered. “I love you.” He kisses him, short repetitive pecks that start on his lips and move around the rest of his face. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Jens wraps him up again and squeezes him, seeking his lips out for a proper kiss before returning a sweet, “Happy birthday, Luc.”

#skamevents #skambingo #van der stoffels #vds #sobbe #kesden #yes i wrote myself a birthday fic #it's entirely self indulgent #vds fic #my fic

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ravenbrenna09 · 4 years

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Title: just roommates

Square Filled: Friends With Benefits, Crackship (possibly?)

Ship: Jens Stoffels/Lucas Van Der Heijden

Created for @skamevents

(please note, this is super lengthy and I don’t know how it happened

...

Because I already posted the first scene of this story, I decided that I wasn’t going to go ahead and post the scene again. So here’s the AO3 Link.

Hey, everyone!

I know that it's been a long time since I've posted a fic, but school is officially over and I got the idea for a VDS friends with benefits while stuck on my Sobbe friends with benefits. And, tada, this fic was born. Thankfully, I just so happened to finish it just in time for VDS fic day so I hope that you all enjoy this wonderful story!

Also, I wasn't for sure on the rating because there are moments where it does imply smut. While I think that this could still be a rated M fic, I simply bumped it up to explicit just to be safe.

(also apologies for it being on the lengthy side, I legitimately do not know how it got so long)

...

Summary: Over the course of the first few months, their roommateship had simply been that. They shared a bedroom and living space together. Whenever one of them had to study for a test or complete a paper, the other one generally tried to be quiet and non-distracting or left the dorm all together to give them the peace and solitude that the other person needed. But, one day, it somehow shifted and they became almost something close to friends.

And, that’s all Jens expected them to be.

Friends.

Roommates.

Until, well, they weren’t.

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malecacidd · 4 years

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Why does Tumblr yeet my fic out of the skambingo and skamevents tag 😔

#😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔

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hopetofantasy · 4 years

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‘Wandering Romance’ - Part 3

- A future with child fic -

Square Filled: Future, Family, Past lovers Ship: Sander Driesen/Robbe Ijzermans Trigger Warnings (if applicable): mentions of abuse, toxic relationships, minimal self harm. Created for @skamevents

Summary: “A perfect, tight little family. But happy. Until one unfortunate day in May, in the year that David turned six.”

In the future, Robbe and Sander have a son named David. The only tie they have left with each other, actually. Because our lovers split up years ago, due to mistakes that were made in the past.

So is their love strong enough to sustain a healthy friendship? Will they find their way to each other again or break all connections for good?

Also available on AO3

——————————————————

CHAPTER 3: 'No one feels the same'

——————————————————

It was the sound of crying that woke him up.

He wasn’t dreaming anyways, because his dreams were reflections of his mind. And his mind didn’t want to cooperate, at least not for the last few hours. He knew why, though. He just didn’t wanted to acknowledge it. He wasn’t even entirely aware of drifting back to awareness. He didn’t want to face the world. The world was filled with empty pain and love lost. True love felt like an illusion, even when he tasted it for a while.

It all tasted sour now...

He slowly hauled his tired body of his yellow, crumpled sheets and tried to identify where the sound came from. Some lingering thoughts forming on the outskirts of his empty mind. ‘Why was this happening?’ ‘Why did it sound like such an agonizing heartbreaking thing?’ ‘This feels so deep, too deep...’

He simply didn’t know.

He acted on instinct, when he crawled towards the mop of curls, bouncing on top of a blubbering mess. Legs tangled into the soft blanket, a hollowed ball of sorrow on the barely fitting mattress, nails unconsciously scratching the arms, leaving deep red marks. Hopefully, they wouldn’t be permanent. Even when the pain felt like it was. But he simply couldn’t ignore it.

He felt it too.

His own heart broke at the sobs.

A mirror to his own feelings.

“Robbe...”

No answer. Just the sound of pain put away for too long, underneath multiple steel layers. A sudden halt to the loudest sobs. Softer tears streaming down the angelic face. Him even crawling deeper into himself. Unclear mumblings. A nail struck harder into the white skin.

A slight drop of red.

Sander couldn’t ignore that. He immediately grabbed the other’s hands, pulling them towards the side. As a result, causing the soft body to fall into his own. An older pattern from days long before. When they looked at each other for hours on end, forgot the world ever existed and their bedroom air was filled with laughter or passion. Sander didn’t want- he didn’t try to reflect.

He tried. But he failed.

“Robbe, wake up! WAKE UP!”

Dark brown eyes shot open to meet the green. Teary, tired and hollow. Things Sander knew best. He felt like somewhat of a specialist in these feelings, unfortunately, not by choice. Fate had dealt him a bad hand. But never for this love. True love, his mind whispered. For the silent boy staring at the deep green of his soul. The one who immediately crawled closer to his warmth.

Who brushed softly over the broken, red skinned knuckles of his right hand.

Who silently whispered “sorry” to him.

Who didn’t even need to do that.

Who pulled his face closer.

Laid hands on his side.

Breathed on his lips.

Took one second.

And eventually...

Made Chernobyl happen.

-^-

Only few hours earlier, they were met with different feeling: enthusiasm.

“God, I missed you two”, the raven haired boy exclaimed, while grasping at both his and Robbe’s arm. It had been too long, though, when they truly had a boy’s night. A real night of good clean fun. Just with the five of them.

Unfortunately, life happened. Jobs happened. Kids happened. Well, maybe not unfortunately, gratefully, but it was just hard to say goodbye to your youth. And say hello to responsibilities. To unpaid bills on the counter. To tired days alone.

To broken minds in the night.

Yeah, okay, Sander, time to tone you down a little.

“Yeah, boys, we really need to do that trip we’re always talking about. That road trip to nowhere. Just a week without anything, like we said right?”, the beach blonde answered. His answer lighting up all the faces around the table.

Aaron was bouncing his head to the idea, always eager to explore more, to learn more. Robbe looked at him with puzzled eyes. Thank god that their son had a sleepover, because this was probably going to be an eventful night.

Moyo barked out his roaring laugh. “Like we don’t keep planning that thing, over and over again. Last time we brought it up, it was right before Robbe started dating someone else again. The time before, Jens decided to spew out a couple of kids. And then that time we came up with it, the whole thing with N-”

The brown skinned boy suddenly stopped, winching at his unfinished sentence. They all knew what he meant, though. It had been just a couple of nights before Noor’s death. One of the few magical ‘before’ moments they collectively remembered. Like they could survive anything. Knowing that they were there, filled by drunken laughter, silly jokes and endless teasing. The prologue to the rest of their lives. They didn’t know at the time.

He tried to examine his friend’s face, catching Robbe doing the exact same thing. They had conversations about this. Maybe Moyo never truly knew, what she had meant to him, himself. There had been lingering somethings in the past. Treaded paths not taken. Careful whispers, loaded glances and brushed lips, too subtle if you didn’t had the knack to pick it up. But the ex-couple did.

He saw how Moyo gripped his glass tighter, urging the gold liquid through his throat. He coughed, asked the rest if they needed anything and walked away with the platter of empty drinks. A glimpse of shiny eyes. Leaving an awkward silence between the squad.

It was Jens, who eventually broke it.

“I think he never got over it, you know?”, looking at his trembling hands.

“Who ever did?”, the other curly boy answered hoarsely.

“We never did. It wouldn’t have been fair to her.”

Sander nodded along.

Sometimes, he caught himself looking at his son, with a heavy breath, seeing her in his features. Reopening all the old wounds from before. But then, his heart would fill with unconditional love again, because, thank god they still had a part of Noor on this world. Readily to love. To see how he would grow. How he would blossom into more than he already gave today. Pride.

“I miss her.”

“Me too.”

Loss is a part of you, it never leaves.

“Guys...”, Jens choked out next. “... I need to say... I’m sorry...”

Again, a curveball they hadn’t anticipated. The boy’s eyes were slowly filling up with tears. They all remained silent, nodding along, knowing that this was something Jens needed to say. The group were never big on feelings, but this sure felt like a beginning. Therapy. Catharsis. A peace of mind.

“I’m sorry.”, the dark haired started rambling. “This is hard for me to admit. But, I should’ve never kept David a secret for you all. I mean, it’s just... Noor wanted to have some time... to deal with all of this, right? She panicked the moment the stick turned blue. I never knew who the guy was and she never told me, either. But then she made me promise never to tell anyone, even you all.

Noor tried to fade into the background more, so nobody would ask what was happening. I shouldn’t have supported that decision... But it’s what she wanted. Trying to set up a stable life. A 9 to 5 job, a savings account and an own apartment. She even took the crappy job at the art school, that paid less than her talents were worth. But she was happy, you know?”

Sander felt the urge to lay a hand on Jens’ shoulder. Robbe seemed to have the same thought, because he was already doing it. They really needed to stop with this telepathy thing. It was starting to freak him out. They weren’t a couple anymore.

“I... I loved her like a sister. I thought she was going to be a great mom. And I was there as the fun uncle, not necessarily the father figure. Noor didn’t want that. She could do it on her own. “I can change the diaper myself, idiot”, she’d yell at me, while throwing some of the baby powder in my face. “I don’t need a babysitter, Jens.” “Go live your life.” She would laugh at the things I did. She was always stubborn like that, you know?”

A collective, watery smile.

The way Jens told this story, though, it felt as if she was standing right next to them. Her presence felt so tangible. Sander could feel her, rolling her eyes, screaming things like “Are you really all crying over me, now, almost a decade later? Dude, wtf, have some fun. Talk about tv shows. Cars. Beer. Idk. Not death. What the hell, people? Get some shots!” Hands would be thrown.

He wanted to revel in that ghostly warmth. Celebrate her life. Find a perfect spot to spray a huge, damn mural. Instead, he said: “Jens. We know how she was. Please, don’t say sorry. We know how you tried. We know she was stubborn. She would say the same if she was here. You never did something wrong. Sometimes fate is just an a-hole. She shouldn’t have died so young. You couldn’t have known.”

He pinched the raven boy’s arm, trying to make him look up. He was met with a face filled with pain. “One day, we will tell David about her story. All together. He’s smart, he knows a lot of biology already and next year, he’ll get sex education in school. We’ll have to tell him some time how he came to be, who he is and what he means to us, right? We can do that.”

“Together”

The deep brown found his, exactly like they should. He knew Robbe said those words, before his mind registered them. As if he was thinking with his heart. As if he ever stopped thinking with his heart. His other hand trailed towards the other, knowing it would be there without question. And their fingers intertwined.

Then he saw that a certain someone had eavesdropped on their conversation.

Moyo had took a while to come up for air again...

They had let him.

Because they understood.

-^-

Conversation had become more of an option rather than a necessity. Faces started to blur, music roared in his brain and sweat drops rolled from his skin. After the bar, they’d found their way to the city centre, to some obscure underground club Moyo said ‘was the bomb’. The atmosphere felt invigorating, as if a painting came to life. Filled with colors, vibes and feelings. Much more of an extreme Bosch than a calming Monet.

A few shots in, Aaron somehow caught the eye of a beautiful brunette. Since he’d never truly grown out of his awkward phase, it had been a blast to see that train wreck happening. And in no way, they were gonna save him from that situation. It was too funny to let it slide.

It almost felt like the old times. Almost.

Because as intoxicated as he was, he felt his burning gaze. He didn’t had to look. He knew what he would see if he decided to turn towards his ex-lover. An excruciating mix of hurt, pining and lust. A reflection of his. They knew each other better than any other soul on the world, so it came as no surprise that they felt similar about the whole situation.

He just didn’t know if he wanted to open that can of worms.

Ever since the David Bowie performance by their son, there had been something more. Even more longing, even more hurt, even more doubt. But Robbe had a boyfriend. The exes shared a beautiful son. They were divorced. They couldn’t just do what they wanted, without consequences. There were others involved. Sander just didn’t know how long he could it hold off anymore.

On cue with his thoughts, the boys suddenly decided to ditch them both, to buy some stuff from a backdoor dealer. Something to take the edge off, he guessed. They’d eventually come back, but that wouldn’t negate the predicament they’d put him in. He didn’t dare to move inside his ex’ neighborhood. He didn’t want to leave him alone either. So he was stuck either way.

The answer came in the form of a drunk body colliding with his, punching him right off the barstool. The helping hand, the held breath, the brown eyes. His soulmate’s eyes. What was it with them? What made them so interesting? So filled with love and passion and hurt and just so many emotions at the same time. He once tried to put them on paper, but he never got them right.

His brain couldn’t function anymore.

He let his hands do the work. They grasped the shirt in front of him, a vaguely familiar black one, and pulled hard. His shiny lips just one breath away and Robbe was already closing his eyes, moaning loudly. Moaning his name. Sending all kinds of emotions through his body. He just needed to take that next step. Slowly... pulling... in...

Before Robbe was roughly pushed away from him.

“I need to talk to you, NOW!!!” A rough voice yelled.

“Okay...” The other answered carefully.

And Robbe was pulled away, leaving a nauseous Sander behind.

-^-

He didn’t meant to eavesdrop.

He didn’t.

Really.

He never thought he was gonna hear Robbe argue with his boyfriend.

It clicked in his brain, the minute he bought some water and went outside for some fresh air. Sobering him up a little. Second guessing what he was about to do, a few minutes ago. To maybe ruin the careful friendship they developed, after so much pain and memories. Maybe it was better to be saved by the bell than to make that mistake again.

But then he heard him.

“... kissing your ex!”

“I wasn’t kissing my ex, Wouter!”

“You were about to! Don’t bullshit me, Robbe. This is one of the reasons you broke up with me, didn’t you? To get back together with that lowlife?”

Excuse me?! What was he insinuating? He was a productive member of society, thank you. His work brought in enough to pay his bills, take care of his son and even save some up for later. He wasn’t a lowli-

Hold up, did Robbe’s boyfriend just say that they BROKE UP?!

“He’s not a lowlife! He’s my ex, he’s the father of my child and he’s not the reason we broke up either!” Robbe retaliated right away.

“Then why did we, Robbe? I don’t get it. I thought we were good together...” Wouter seemed to try another approach. Whispers instead of yelling. He could see the body language changing from a harsh, defensive stance to a softer approach. It made Sander’s skin crawl. He didn’t know why. It was some sort of vibe that was just... off.

“We weren’t good together. I don’t know if you noticed, but we were NEVER good together. And you know exactly why...”

Wouter held up his hand, trying to touch Robbe’s cheek, wanting to calm him down. Yet, that last one immediately slapped the hand away. He could see how it affected the now-apparent-ex. How the hands started to form fists. The eyes started to flinch. Similar to a bull preparing to strike towards the matador.

“Oh yeah? You thought we were never good together, huh? What are you insinuating? I picked you off the metaphorical street, Robbe, because you were so heartbroken over someone who didn’t even think twice about dumping you. Even with your collective history. I build you back up to the man you are now. I made sure you were loved, that you had your needs filled, that you could call me whenever you wanted. And I did that, didn’t I. Right?!”

A flash of doubt on the other’s face. His expression filled with contradictory emotions, his body freezing at the featherlight touch of Wouter’s finger trailing his cheek and his eyes... Sander never saw them this pained. Eventually, after a short silence, the brown haired boy whispered: “You did that, yes. And I’m grateful for that. But you did other things too. I... I just can’t anymore. I can’t.”

“What can you do anymore, Robbe? What? US? YOU MEAN US?!”, the other started yelling again.

“Stop yelling, Wouter”, the other said calmly. (Fearfully?)

“What’s wrong, baby. You used to love when I yelled at you. You used to love to be yell to. My name, over and over again. After I made you come, over and over again. You never begged me to stop, remember? You wanted more. More of the harsh words, the cuffs, the pushing, the burn inside, the pain, right? I remember not having a safe word at one time. That time was fun, no?”

Sander suddenly felt furious. What the actual f? Was this dipshit really saying what he was thinking right now? No safe word? Pain? Burn inside? What the hell did Wouter do to him? He saw how the expression on the man’s face changed to a cold, emotionless look. The look of something dangerous. Something that rang all the alarms in his brain. His whole body started to prepare, to release inner anger. To fight.

“I... I...”

“You want me, right?”, the other said, with venom in his mouth. “You still want me. You can’t stop thinking about me. Even after what I did to you. You keep coming back for more. You want it, Robbe, face it. You want the pain. You love the pain. You love receiving it.

Even when you say ‘no’,

I know you want it.

Last time, last time was a mistake, you know that. You shouldn’t have said ‘no’. You didn’t mean it. I wouldn’t have drank. I wouldn’t have trying to go to your son’s room. You wouldn’t have fell by pulling me. Then you wouldn’t have had the bruises, the cuts. The broken bones. If you just had let me, I could’ve-”

He never got to finish that sentence.

Because, after that, a flash of beach blonde hair moved into the man’s vision.

An ex-lover. A father. A man with bottled up agony, hurt and anger.

Someone who needed a perfect release.

And Wouter?

Seemed to be the perfect victim.

Excellent even, to liberate him from that pent-up energy.

So for Sander, the world temporarily turned black.

Until only the color red was left.

-^-

Chernobyl was beautiful at first.

Chernobyl was love second.

Chernobyl was warmth as a third.

But then Chernobyl was also pain.

Agony.

Heart breaking.

A nuclear disaster.

Which Sander discovered the following morning.

When he turned around to kiss his boy.

His beautiful ex-turned-lover-again.

And found the bed empty.

#wtfock #wtfam #skambingo #skamevents #part 3 of 4

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