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diningpageantry · 5 years

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No Wait Unblock Me

Archive Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18215168/chapters/43133210

Chapter 2/10 of It’s A Handheld Disaster

Word Count: 1580

Chapter Summary: Simon and Baz finally get to "mutuals" status.

BAZ

For the third time today, I see a similar notification slide through my drop down.

bi-sammy sent you a picture

Part of me initially wants to sigh, roll my eyes, and swipe it away, because apparently part of me wishes to be alone for the rest of my life. Thankfully, the reasonable, tiny sliver of my mind makes sure I don’t make such a mistake.

Given the situation, one would think we’d parted ways. He makes a post, we stop the argument, all is fair in fandom and war. Except, now I believe Snow has grown under an impression that after one exchange, it qualifies us for somewhat of a friendship, and therefore reason to send me memes. Don’t get me wrong, memes are a fantastic waste of time and barely a waste of energy, but it’s strange that he’s not fucking off like most people.

Maybe I’m used to others being scared of me.

Maybe I’m used to others following my tactics of scaring them away.

Whatever I’ve done hasn’t worked, since this arse is immune to my attempts at coldness and mild animosity. I’m starting to suspect there’s something genuinely wrong with him, like he doesn’t get enough love and attention.

Guess that makes two of us.

I guess I somewhat crave this friendship. I’ll speak the truth to that and say yes, I smile when his memes pop up. They’re almost always fandom, and definitely made on Photoshop. This one, I see as I tap and let it load, is the crudely drawn Kirby graphic shoving burgers into his mouth, but over Kirby is photoshopped a picture of Huxley’s face and the burgers are Sam's ass.

It’s all poorly done and, sadly, extremely endearing.

My thumbs hover over my keyboard, cheeks creasing as I stare down at the picture. I lay back against my pillows, the curtains drawn and my hair pulled out of my face. It’s quite lonely; my life’s a sterile mixture of quarantined education and age old settled dust in my ancient room. It’s nice to have his somewhat obnoxious messages pop onto my screen, but it feels so odd. So foreign, and barely understood.

I want to understand.

gaystrell: why are you still messaging me?

I get an answer not even a minute later.

bi-sammy: do you want me to stop?

I don’t even hesitate to send out a reply, feeling a steadily growing lump in my throat, choking me mindless.

gaystrell: no.

bi-sammy: then why did you ask?

gaystrell: i just

gaystrell: don’t get it

bi-sammy: get what?

gaystrell: why you’d want to talk to me

bi-sammy: because youre cool

gaystrell: vexing me won’t get you “street cred”, if that’s what you’re after

bi-sammy: shit no wait that’s not what i meant

bi-sammy: dont block me fukc wait

bi-sammy: id just meant that you wrote all that shit and i thought it was really cool and

bi-sammy: i dont know

bi-sammy: i thought we could be friends since you did all that

bi-sammy: ill stop if you want me to

gaystrell: calm down you’re clogging my notifs

gaystrell: do that again and i /will/ block you

gaystrell: but………. if you actually do want to be friends i suppose i’m willing to give forth a little attention

bi-sammy: im osrry i dont speak posh cunt

gaystrell: too bad, blocked

bi-sammy: no wait unblock me

gaystrell: fine last chance

bi-sammy: bitch

gaystrell: b l o c k e d

bi-sammy: no but,,,,,,, i do want to be friends

I’m smiling like a fucking loon, scrolling through our brief exchange. It’s strange. Most people aren’t upfront about wanting to talk, or wanting someone to talk with. Wanting a friend, even. I have the people follow me and ask me questions, and of that only a small handful of those who actually interact eith me (and even in that, we usually only speak to give each other a helping hand).

And despite that, here’s someone who wants to try.

I suck my lower lip into my mouth, trying to think of my course of actions.

There’s a simple one I can take now (and probably should’ve taken as an initiative). I click his icon, and click “Follow” on his page.

It doesn’t take very long before I get a notification come through, starting that he mentioned me in a post.

It isn’t very long, but it gets its point across in the best way possible. It’s just a mobile screenshot, reading “gaystrell started following bi-sammy” with a quick caption.

god himself entered the groupchat. how do i block him?

SIMON

I wonder what it’d be like to see me in the moment. It’s a real shame Penn wasn’t around to capture it, since I’m in the middle of French class, but I must’ve smiled so stupidly that it caught the attention of the professor. He gave me a stern look until I set down my mobile.

The moment he turned away, I opened it back up and grinned.

At first, I didn’t believe what I was seeing. Him. Following me.

Us. Mutuals. Mutuals.

Of course I had to screenshot and post as a brag (barely humble, more metaphorically sucking my own knob for all my followers to see). Nobody really cares, as expected.

Well, nobody except the single message from none other than Mr. Bitch.

gaystrell: blocked. unfollowed. reported. waste of space.

My smile creases back my cheeks as they flush pink. I send back a quick message before turning my mobile over, foot tapping double the speed of the analogue on the wall.

bi-sammy: ;)

BAZ

He winked. Interesting.

I’m out of breath.

Fuck?

I lay my phone flat away from me, face down as I squint at my wall. I should respond in a composed fashion. I have to be clever, and not one-upping him is never an option. After all, does this qualify as flirting? Friendly banter? What am I doing with this random fucking bloke that I don’t even have a face to put to?

He’s my age. Roughly. Yes?

I check his tumblr again, as if I hadn’t just read his bio earlier.

simon // he/him // 17 // hold my fucking hand (please)

Maybe he’s just straight and I’m misreading it. Yes. Probably. Aren’t most people straight? Is that still a fact? (I highly doubt it, given how boring that must be.) But he winked at me. Somewhat prompted, I’ll give him that, but it was still a fucking wink.

I wink in texts to Dev and Niall too, though, but that’s different, isn’t it? I’d never snog either of them (especially fucking Dev), but hey. If unfaced internet boy asked for a snog, would I?

I’m too wrapped up and starved for human interaction to properly deal with this.

gaystrell: i will carry on with my threats, snow

There it is. Perfectly biting, while not being entirely rejecting. Maybe I’m better at this than I thought.

Or, perhaps, I’m worse, because even an hour and a half after sending the text, he’s silent.

I remind myself every few minutes that he most likely attends an actual school and has classes, but it makes my chest ache in the most unfair way every time my mobile tempts me with an unrelated notification.

I work myself to the point of moping down in the kitchen, slumping against the fridge whilst watching Vera make tea. She’s relatively silent, knowing better than anybody to leave me to sulk.

“You’re a drama queen,” she tuts, looking over me. Granted, I dress like a slob and borderline haunt this godforsaken mansion, but I feel as though that makes me entitled to being the way I am.

“I’m lonely,” I sigh, head resting against the fridge. It hums beside me, the chromed metal cooling my cheek. “Am I not granted a dramatic spell every now and then?”

“Not unprovoked.”

I set a hand against the handle, then let it drop. I’m not hungry. “What if it was provoked?”

“Is it?”

Instinctively, I pull out my phone and click it on. Nothing. “Perhaps.”

Vera frowns at me, walking over and setting a hand on my arm. “What’s wrong? Are you feeling okay?”

My eyes slowly roll as I push myself off the appliance, standing upright. “Physically, yes. Don’t fuss. It’s just… online shit.”

“You spend too much time on the phone,” she sighs, letting go and going back to the tea as she fixes me a mug. “Don’t you think you’d be happier to disconnect from social media for a day or two? Go on a walk, see nature?”

I snort, looking outside. “And what? Trip and bust open my knee? That’d wind me back up in care for at least a few days.”

“You act like you’re made of paper and glass.” She offers over my mug, letting my fingers wind around the handle before she shakes her head.

“I might as well be,” I huff down before thanking her and blowing on my tea.

Once I leave back up to my room, I realise it's somehow more depressing in here over the kitchen with Vera’s disapproval of technology rantings. At least she’s some sort of company.

As I’m sipping my tea, I go back to scrolling on my laptop as a notif pops up, jarring me with the sound but letting me breathe again.

bi-sammy: why do you know my last name smh

I exhale slowly, smiling to myself.

gaystrell: you commented on my google doc, you idiot

#carry on #fanfiction #fanfic #snowbaz #fic #mine #it's a handheld disaster #simon snow #tyrannus basilton grimm pitch #tyrannus basilton grimm-pitch #baz pitch #simon #baz #wow look at me #updating once a day #wowwie

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custompotato · 7 years

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(My first one! Ahhh! Im So excited!) Thank you, @lovelylangst, for tagging me!

Rules: Write 92 truths about yourself then tag 25 people (I dont have 25 people But imma try anyway!!!)

Long ass post.

LAST… [1] drink: Coffee [2] phone call:My mom [3] text message: Sent? My mom. Received? One of my WoW friends (whom i love) [4] song you listened to: She Keeps Me Up, by Nickleback. [5] time you cried: Last night.

HAVE YOU EVER… [6] dated someone twice: I dont think so. [7] been cheated on: Probably tbh [8] kissed someone and regretted it: Nope. [9] lost someone special: Do... Do pets count? [10] been depressed: Yes, but I’m getting a lot of help from the fambam [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: Nope!! Dont drink too much, and I cant remember the last time I threw up involuntarily.

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS: [12] Dark Blue [13] Orange [14] Red

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: Yup! And I’m so, so happy! I love them! [16] fallen out of love: I can’t say I’ve ever romantically *loved* someone, just kinda liked them, and that’s still going strong so. [17] laughed until you cried: ...We do not mention that night. [18] found out someone was talking about you: In what way? Like. meanly? Nicely? I dont think anyone would tbh I kinda suck [19] met someone who changed you: Read: The Fambam. [20] found out who your true friends are: Uhhhh. Nothing like... Super cataclysmic clued me in? [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: ... I dont think so? My memory of time is pretty shit tbh.

GENERAL… [22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: All but like. 4. [23] do you have any pets: 54: 3 dogs, 8 cats, 3 goats(babies incoming), 12 ducks, 24 chickens, 2 pigs, 1 snake, 1 goose [24] do you want to change your name: Not to anything specific?? I just like using alias [25] what did you do for your last birthday: Do people celebrate those? ;;;; haha... ha. Im a lonely, old gremlin. [26] what time did you wake up: 6:53 [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: Sleeping. [28] name something you cannot wait for: S3 of Voltron, more wonderful angst of any of my favorite characters, happiness without worry, being 18 so i can do shit, retirement, bedtime. [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: 3 seconds ago when I looked over to make sure she didnt know I was on Tumblr. [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: My insecurites and general disgust and hatred for life. [31] what are you listening to right now: One of the freaking chickens laying eggs outside. And the pig playing with her food toy. [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: ... Prob, tbh, but I dont know their names. Only their groceries. [33] something that is getting on your nerves: My family [34] most visited website: Tumblr/Ao3 [35] elementary: Coal Creek [36] high school: (i dont understand the context.) What year im in? last. One i go to? Connections Academy. Favorite year? Junior [37] college: I do intend on going? To Aims [38] hair color: Natural? Brown. Current? Brown with the underside a dark red(really pretty red) [39] long or short hair: Long <3 [40] do you have a crush on someone: No comment... *sweatdrops* [41] what do you like about yourself: Uh... Um... I am the reincarnation of Happy Bunny, as said by my coworker. [42] piercings: A helix. I want my tongue done though [43]blood type: Hell if i know. Red. Prob... kinda salty-sweet, for you vamps out there. I dont taste good but youre welcome to try. [44] nickname: Carrie/Path [45] relationship status: Single. [46] zodiac sign: Virgo. [47] pronouns:She/her [48] fav tv show: Too many to list, but current is Voltron [49] tattoos: I wanna get one. Several, really. [50] right or left hand: Right

FIRST… [51] surgery: Idk, maybe? Prob not though. [52] piercing: Ears [53] best friend: Irl? Ruby/Bo. Online? the Fambam in its entirety. [54] sport: To do? Ick. To watch? Basketball, i guess Favorites to watch/read about: tennis, basketball [55] vacation: Vegas, 7th Grade [56] pair of trainers: Those are shoes right?

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: Nothing! [58] drinking: Nothing! [59] i’m about to: Finish this up, read some langst, and go to work! [60] listening to: Nothing, rn [61] waiting for: Happiness. And my later doom. Screw work. [62] want: Happiness. And a nap. [63] get married: Only for tax benefits [64] career: Divorce Lawyer! (dreams of little girls, right?)

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: both. Fight me. [66] lips or eyes: Eyes, because they dont mock me verbally. Also i can actually draw them so. [67] shorter or taller: I like tall people. I wish I were short. [68] older or younger: Should I care??? As long as I’m not breaking laws, well. [70] nice arms or nice stomach: Stomach. And arms. Crush me against your nice stomach with your nice arms. [71] sensitive or loud: I am loud to cover up my sensitivity [72] hook up or relationship: ... depends tbh. If i were more confident in my body i would totally lean to hook up though. But also, cuddles are nice? I want cuddles. [73] troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant. I am the most timid potato.

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? Nope! [75] drank hard liquor? Yup! [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? Dont remind me. [77] turned someone down: Yup! [78] sex on first date? Haha. Me? Sex? (im not confident enough for sex. also. No dates) [79] broken someone’s heart? ....If i think really hard and ignore the part of me saying noone could love me like that, I actually... Have? Several times? FML IM SORRY SIT! [80] had your own heart broken? You cant break what I have already crushed! Haha! [81] been arrested? Almost, but not really. [82] cried when someone died? Do pets/videogame characters count?? [83] fallen for a friend? ... No comment. (looks away shiftily)

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? I thought we established the extreme no-ness of this? [85] miracles? Why should I? They’ll never benefit me. [86] love at first sight? Lust, yes. Love? Doesnt exist. [87] Santa Claus? No. [88] kiss on the first date? Who is the date with? [89] angels? Nope!

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: Ruby/Bo/Ro/Entirety of Fambam [91] eye color: Brown [92] favorite movie: uhh... Kung Fu Panda 2 I guess.

Tagged peoples:

@moriatake @hubbletuff @redmullets @strifingkind @ghost-toaster @vivelavoltron @rubatosisopossum @kaxpha (you dont know me but I love you) @appsa @baked-mashed-potato @daddyshiro @aquabutterfly @demiquaver @lance-lance-revolution hnnnn how many more to go idont want to just tag random people ahh plz dont hate me, @bext-k because. youre like a queen. we need to know things. @lolygothica bc youre pretty much the reason i have tumblr thank you for all your fake fb posts and texts ilysm, @moroseconcept @prince-lance-of-altea cant wait for the Secret Circle au, ily for that, @sniperlance bc im running out of people and ily too even if we never talked before, @the-blue-artemis at this point half the people here i know from their langst. pretty sure im doing this wrong is it supposed to be just mutuals?!?! okay im done its not 25 people but i cant.. figure out... who else. (Please dont hate me T-T)

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morrisbrokaw · 6 years

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On Making New Friends as an Adult

It was an unusually warm February day in 2017 when I walked into Studio 2, a quaint coffee shop in South Minneapolis, and nervously scanned the room. I was looking for a maybe (?), potentially (??), soon-to-be new friend. I didn’t see her. I pulled out my phone and glanced at my Instagram messages, double checking (fine, triple checking), that I was indeed in the right place. I was, of course, but it never hurts to make sure.

I stood there, unsuccessfully trying to fit in, my mind beginning to perform the mental gymnastics it likes to do before any social encounter—’What will we talk about?’ ‘Do we shake hands? Hug? Not engage in physical contact at all?’ ‘Will they like me? As a human???’—until my maybe, potentially, soon-to-be new friend walked in.

“Kendall! Hi!!” I yelled across the crowded space, with an overeager wave to match. We exchanged greetings, ordered coffee, sat down, talked. We covered all the usual bases, and for an hour and a half we got to know each other there, from across the table next to the window. Some time later, we got up to leave, exchanged numbers, hugged, and went our separate ways. And NOT TO BREAK THE MAGIC WITH A BUNCH OF SPOILERS, but in the year and a half since that balmy February day, Kendall and I have become actual friends. I’m going to be in her wedding next June. I cannot wait.

So that’s it, really. My journey in making new friends as an adult. You grab coffee. You click. You get to be in their wedding. Everything is perfect!!

No, just kidding. The road to friendship bliss can be a bit more meandering than that, as it turns out.

It had first occurred to me a few years prior, this inkling to make new friends. I had been out of school for a while, in the midst of a weird post-college friendship limbo. The majority of my friends were often busy—with long-term relationships, with family, with work, with travel. I was busy, too, sure, but there were still plenty of weekends when I found myself entirely alone. I wanted to meet new people. I wanted to expand my community, if you will. But I had no idea where to start. Where does one even make friends as an adult?? I had no idea.

Growing up (at least for me), new friendships were made in rather formulaic environments. You went to daycare, you made friends there. You went to school, you made a few more. You went to summer camp, you latched onto a few new people. You participated in extracurriculars, you made friends with shared interests. On and on it went, with more of the same in middle school, and in high school, and then, if you decided to go to college and live in the very small, contained spaces known as dorm rooms, you had the chance to make even more friends. You were set. It’s not that it was always easy, the business of making friends during school. But there were plenty of built-in opportunities—nuggets of time and proximity that were sure to render you at least a few confidants.

That all seemed to change after school. Unless you worked in an office with a lot of people around your age (whose company you also happened to enjoy??), or you were coordinated enough to participate in a sporting league, or outgoing enough that you simply happened to, I don’t know, meet people in the public realm (?!), the task of making new friends could feel daunting. Which is exactly the predicament I found myself in prior to that February day.

“So, how did you do it?” you may find yourself asking. “How did you overcome your mild fear of human interaction plus occasional social ineptitude long enough to convince people to give you a chance over coffee??” Terrific questions. A+ inquiries. The thing that allowed me to meet most of my new friends was, actually, the internet.

A friend (/mentor/former boss) named Danielle had published a blog post titled Find a Friend in Your City, hoping to respond to the exact quandary I described above. Her goal was exactly as it sounds—to connect people who were interested in meeting new friends in their respective cities. Over the course of the next few months, I connected with multiple women through that means alone (Kendall included!), all of whom are still good friends of mine today.

I’ve met folks in the comments section of other blogs, too. And if at this point you’re thinking, ‘Jackie, do you just… prowl the various comments sections of the internet in your spare time, hoping to lure in new friends??’, the answer is a definitive yes. Or, I mean, not really. But comments sections of websites you love actually aren’t a bad place to meet people. After all, you already know you share similar interests, in at least some respects; that common ground can be a good place from which to begin a relationship. I would recommend.

Another way I’ve met people online? Through the apps on my phone that occupy so damn much of my time—through social media. Often the people I meet via Instagram or Twitter are those I’ve known for years, before one of us finally caves, slides into the ol’ DMs, and says, “Would you want to grab drinks sometime?” Social media platforms can be great, connective places in their own right. But getting to know people in person? That’s generally even better.

I’ve realized over this past year and a half the value of both well-established friendships and newer ones. The friends I’ve had since high school and college know me. They’re aware of my quirks and shortcomings; they could list off many an embarrassing story that should never see the light of day. As far as relationships go, they’re the easy, comfortable kind, grounded by a strong foundation built brick by brick over the years.

The friendships I’ve made more recently? They’ve opened my eyes to new ways of living and being in the world. They’ve changed my perspective and made me examine my own patterns and habits more closely. Every time I meet someone new, every time we click, I’m wholly amazed all over again. There are so many people floating around these places in which we live—people with diverse backgrounds and viewpoints and with stories to share—and I’ve realized I’m doing myself a disservice if I don’t at least try to get to know a few more of them.

If you are not in the market for new friends right now? That is fine! That is cool. I understand it and I respect it. If you are? This is the part where I distill down a few of my own suggestions for how to do so. There is no set strategy, no predetermined path everyone must take to make new friends, to build their respective communities. So take mine with a grain of salt, and let me know if you have any of your own (please and thank you!!). Alright, here we go:

Hop into the comments section of your favorite blog. Mention the city you live in, ask if anyone else lives there, too. If you get a response, connect with that person on social media. Meet up face-to-face if it feels right. This method might sound weird on paper but hey, sometimes it works.

If social media is more your jam, think of the people you interact with most on your platforms of choice. Send them a DM. Ask if they’d like to meet for coffee or drinks sometime. The worst that can happen is they don’t respond, or they say no. (Believe me, I’ve long gone over all the worst possible outcomes in my head; the legwork has been done.) You can survive a no, I promise.

It is also possible—rare though it may seem!!—to encounter people out in the wild, in person. I’ve met folks through mutual friends and on planes and at various public locales and at the extremely niche event that was the live taping of a podcast. The key to meeting people in real life is, in my experience, to be present; to put down your electronic devices; to pay attention as the world spins around you. I am not trying to lecture, I swear (I generally maintain a vice grip on my phone, too! I am working on it!)—I am more so issuing a gentle reminder. People will approach you with much more ease if you’re not engrossed in a screen at all times.

These circles of relationships we make and foster over the years don’t have to close up after high school or college. They can keep expanding and contracting, ebbing and flowing with whatever stage of life we happen to be in right now. We grow, we change, and we can continue to invite new people in. Who knows: the next person you meet might be exactly the one you need in that moment. They might not be, and that’s okay, too. Either way, by my calculation, you may very well get some coffee out of the deal. And coffee? Coffee is always a good idea.

Images via: 1 / 2 / 3

Jackie Saffert is a human person who lives in Minneapolis. In her spare time, you can find her running along the river road, loitering in the vicinity of the nearest puppy at a local brewery, or recharging her soul (?!) in her tiny sanctuary of an apartment. She likes to write; she thinks you are very kind for reading the words above.

The post On Making New Friends as an Adult appeared first on Wit & Delight.

On Making New Friends as an Adult published first on https://workbootsandshoes.tumblr.com/

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ouraidengray4 · 6 years

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12 Super-Achievable Ways to Unplug More This Year

We use our phones for absolutely everything. Need to eat? Seamless or Grubhub is just minutes away. Need to send your exact location to a friend? Drop a pin. Need a date? Hop onto Bumble and swipe until you line one up. While 24/7 access to these technologies has greatly improved our quality of life in many ways, our mental health and social skills have also taken a hit, at least according to The TAF Preventive Medicine Bulletin.

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Of course, there are also plenty of emotional benefits to our smartphones: Many folks live far away from family and old friends, and contemporary technology plays a vital role in keeping those relationships intact. But where do we draw the line?

When reflecting on this past year, I realized that I had gotten sucked into my online world with the good intention of keeping in touch with my loved ones, but that being connected 24/7 had cost me some mental health—and a lot of time. So I’ve resolved to make some major changes this year to help me disconnect, which will also help me focus on myself and my goals, and upkeep those relationships in a more healthy way. Here are 12 ways that you can do this too:

1. Join an accountability group (kind of!).

Sometimes because I work so much, I don’t get to see my friends very often. Weeks or months of "we need to catch up" texts will go by until finally, we find an hour when we’re both free (and exhausted) after work. At this point, the hangout, which is almost always grabbing a drink at the bar, can feel more like a chore than anything else.

But there are ways to combat this struggle—and the constant scheduling ping-pong that precedes it. Seek out friends who also want to unplug and take turns planning outings and evenings where you can leave your cellphones at the door and enjoy each other’s company instead. You can theme it up too: Get into a murder mystery game, host a wine tasting, do some karaoke...

2. Plan work lunch dates.

Usually, when I eat lunch at work, I end up blindly surfing the web. I feel like I desperately need to pause from the day’s tasks, but I don’t actually leave my desk, so I mindlessly browse Facebook or Pinterest... but I don’t ever take an actual break. And I’ve noticed that since I’ve fallen into this pattern, I don’t really have a lot of friends at work or know much about my co-workers.

This year, I’ve started asking my co-workers to eat lunch with me. I’m learning more about my colleagues, which is fun, and also helps out when navigating how to alleviate tension at work and understanding how my colleagues work best. It’s also great for avoiding that end-of-day technology hangover.

3. Give yourself a home project.

This year, I decided that instead of sitting on my couch looking through Instagram on the weekends, I’d give myself small projects in my home, starting with a super-easy DIY chalkboard wall, working up to redecorating my bathroom.

Pinterest can be overwhelming—especially considering how many Pinterest endeavors, once you actually try them, end up being epic fails—but there are a few good ones in the pile. One of my favorite projects that actually panned out was this pallet coffee mug organizer, only with one alteration: I used "S" hooks that you can buy at your local hardware store instead so that I can switch out what I hang there. Sometimes I use it for my mugs, other times to hang herbs. Another successful project: DIYing old glass jars into decorative containers to store bathroom items like Q-tips and bobby pins.

4. Get a workout buddy.

You may have a fitness goal this year, but if you’re anything like me, you’ll spend half your time at the gym adjusting your playlist and snapping photos on your Instagram Story. Look! I worked out! Here’s proof! You end up leaving the gym two hours later with only about 45 minutes of actual working out accomplished.

Next time you work out, bring a buddy and leave your phone in your locker instead. You can’t get lost in your own world if you’re busy catching up in between sets, plus your friend can push you to achieve your fitness goals and vice-versa.

5. Schedule phone calls and Facetime.

I often find myself overwhelmed by a deluge of text threads from out-of-town family and friends. Keeping up with those relationships is very important to me, but sometimes I feel like I’m taking hours at a time to catch up via text. Worse yet, I usually feel like we never even truly connect and instead just gush about how much we miss one another.

This year’s solution: scheduling phone calls and Facetimes with my loved ones so I can give them my undivided attention. Sure, yes, I’m still on my phone, which isn’t exactly disconnecting, but a one-hour, high-quality Facetime or phone call allows me to catch up with my loved ones way more than hours of distracted text messaging can. What’s gained? Time and real connections. Plus, we can plan for when we’re going to talk, so it’s convenient for both of us—and we have far more real news to catch up on by the time we can speak on the phone.

6. Make a reading list.

As a kid, I loved reading, and as an adolescent, books helped me escape. But as an adult, I’ve fallen completely flat. The excuses are endless, but primarily center around the same concern: I feel like I don’t have the time. This year, I decided to make a reading list so that I couldn’t make any more excuses.

Now every time someone recommends a book, I write it down in my planner with a note on the genre or subject matter so I have a running list to choose from. Instead of surfing the web, I make sure I use that critical 30 minutes before bedtime to read. According to The National Sleep Foundation, unplugging before bedtime improves the quality of your sleep. Combine that with the positive effects of reading, including increased connectivity in the brain, and you’re out of excuses to avoid doing something you already love.

7. Pass The '90s Test.

Being a child of the new millennium, I have no idea how to date without social media and cell phones—we’ve grown up learning to take our social cues and flirtations from Instagram, Snapchat, and text messages. I was thinking recently about what my relationships would be like if they weren’t so rooted in online communication and realized that most of them would be effectively nonexistent. So I realized I needed to stop developing more 2D relationships and focus instead on seeing potential romances in person.

So I came up with what I call "The '90s Test." I’ll only use my phone to set up a date with a person (like you would when you called someone’s landline back in the day). I make sure to leave on time so I don’t have the crutch of texting updates when I’m late, and I bring a book to read while I wait if they’re late. I’ve found that this also sets the standard of not using phones on the date, so that it’s uninterrupted and genuine. This way, if it’s a good date, you’ll know quickly that you have a real connection—and if it’s not going anywhere, you won’t have to wonder. You’ll figure it out fast instead of hiding behind your phone.

8. Invest in a camera.

The beauty of the modern age is that we don’t need 800 different devices to do everything we want; your iPhone can do practically everything. But how many times have you been on vacation or at an event where you promised yourself that you’d only bring your phone for pictures, but end up posting all over (and subsequently scrolling through) Instagram, or pretending to be occupied with something on your phone in order to avoid mingling or diffuse an awkward situation? I’ve done that so many times, and I walk away from the experience feeling like I kind of missed it all. This has led me to buy a simple camera. It makes me stay in the moment, and later, if I really want to upload any to Instagram when I’m bored at home, I always can.

9. Pioneer nights.

Growing up in Florida, this is how my parents used to make losing power during a hurricane fun. My parents would challenge my brother and me to avoid using anything electric all night. We’d eat by candlelight, talk instead of watching TV, and go to bed when we were actually tired.

Try this at home alone or throw an adult sleepover with friends: Break out your favorite candles, no-cook snacks (cheese, wine, and a box of frozen cupcakes should do the trick), and board games, and spend the night sans electronics. Go to bed early, and you’ll feel like a million bucks the next day.

10. Get a pen pal.

A while ago, my friend Lauren and I decided to become pen pals. You might assume that going old-school this way would make keeping up our friendship harder, but while we speak less than we might otherwise, the quality of the communication is much higher. I feel like so much online communication is one-sided, but as pen pals, we’re forced to ask questions about each other’s lives.

When I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, who is a mutual friend, I sent Lauren a letter about it. About a week later, I received a letter from her expressing her condolences and agreeing that he was a jerk, and a week after that, I sent her a letter back, updating her on how I was doing. By the time she’d sent the next letter, I was already healing and there wasn’t any room for petty he-said/she-said talk. It felt like a really natural way to process the breakup and receive support from a friend. Now we send each other goodies like homemade jewelry in the mail too, and she’s one less friend I have to worry about texting—we’ve got our own thing going.

11. Take a class.

I’m the biggest culprit of complaining I have no time for anything, but then spending hours on my phone, doing a whole lot of nothing. I’d always like to go to that yoga, painting, or acting class, but then my day flashes before my eyes. This year, though, I plan to go to a class once a week.

I know it’s not possible for everybody, but if you can, consider trying to build an extra $30-60 per week into your budget. Learning new things is an amazing act of self-care. And when you actively engage in learning as an adult, not only will you feel an incomparable sense of accomplishment you can’t get at work, but you’ll also just become a more interesting human.

12. Jump into your side hustle.

Probably the only thing more popular than the puppy filter on Snapchat right now is having a side hustle. So many of us are coming into our own as creators and want to be in charge of our own source of income. Whether that means making personalized t-shirts or starting your own production company, consider starting to take baby steps toward your entrepreneurial dreams instead of endlessly checking Facebook. When you’re doing something for yourself that you’re passionate about, the benefits are endless.

Anie Delgado is a freelance writer, actress, and musician based in NYC. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter @anie_delgado and check out her music on Spotify. from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2EmanGT 12 Super-Achievable Ways to Unplug More This Year Greatist RSS from HEALTH BUZZ http://ift.tt/2mbt1L9

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