#sangwoo and his mom baking

[carmenlire]

your christmas hcs are SO cute! i love thinking about how much jaeyoung's family loves sangwoo. if jaeyoung had a younger sibling im sure they would absolutely adore him and sangwoo would team up with them once in a while to play a fun trick on jaeyoung. and jaeyoung's dad finally has someone that can compete with him in chess and defeats him. i also like to think that sangwoo actually loves baking bc he did it with his mom growing up and its easier than cooking since its more precise <3

omg I love the idea of Jaeyoung's siblings teaming up with sangwoo! jaeyoung would act so shocked and offended but inside he'd be all warm and happy 🥺🥺 and oh my gosh yes! sangwoo and Jaeyoung's dad spend like a literal three hours playing chess and jaeyoung is like "sangwoo-ahhhh I brought you home to spend time with me 😔" and sangwoo is just totally focused! Jaeyoung's dad ends up winning the first match but it was incredibly close and they have a rematch/make it a tradition to play every time sangwoo visits for a weekend/holiday (and they are evenly matched so sangwoo wins the next one, etc).

and oh! I love the baking hc!! I totally see sangwoo enjoying baking because it needs careful measurements and is so methodical plus yes-- it's also is a warm memory (omg with our?? amazing parents hc what if the mom found a hobby or way to channel Sangwoo's need for rigidity as a little kid! plus it's kinda the same idea as video games-- you have to put effort in and that effort is rewarded 🥺) I did have sangwoo having a sweet tooth as a thing in Flex On Me and I like the idea of him cooking and jaeyoung-- omg jaeyoung just randomly but regularly gets treats from sangwoo! sangwoo will just show up to jaeyoungs with a Tupperware container of cookies and jaeyoung is perplexed at first before he realizes! and sangwoo makes Christmas cookies with Jaeyoung 🥺 and he's so careful about it and jaeyoung respects his process and is so happy to be allowed to participate and sangwoo totally kisses him more than he should but well the cookies need to cool before they can ice them 🥺🥺

#ahhhh i love your ideas!! #and maybe they go to Sangwoo’s family's and jaeyoung wakes up one morning to see #sangwoo and his mom baking #and he just stands in the doorway for an incredibly long time #lost in watxhing his boyfriend with his mom and he looks so carefree and happy #and Sangwoo's mom like teases sangwoo and his boyfriend kaughs and it's just perfect #and Sangwoo's mom sees the way jaeyoung looks at her son and #it's everything she always wanted for him :( #and when sangwoo finally notices jaeyoung there #he grins and says #jaeyoungie hyung eomma said her cookies are better than mine. we need you to taste test #and jaeyoung makes a show of it.but obviously Sangwoo is the best 🥺🥺 #ahhhhhh #asked #answered #anon #semantic error #my writing tag #se anon

[ksbwnotes]

Chapter 2

1. Oof

I’m sure, even after being told about this ‘relative’, Sangwoo kept it cool and didn’t tip off anything to the police, acting like “OH RIGHT MY RELATIVE THAT I HAVEN’T SEEN IN A FKKN DECADE”. It comes to show that he is incredibly calculating and intelligent, able to keep a facade on to an artform. This was probably something he has been able to do ever since he was a child, as we’ll later witness in his flashbacks.

Later Sangwoo says “you might as well have said you were my brother”, which is meaningful because Sangwoo doesn’t have one. So every relative Sangwoo knows is just as nonexistent as his nonexistent sibling.

2. I find this important to note

Bum obviously is prone to putting people on pedestals, only seeing them through the rose tinted glass he wants to see them in.

3. Why this though?

I find it very interesting that, because he doesn’t want to die, what he yells out is “I FELL IN LOVE!”  Why this? I’m sure he’s also used this an excuse for the others he has stalked (I wonder if Sangwoo ever realized that Bum also stalked women and how he felt about that), but it most likely never worked with them. 

Bum was just spouting whatever came to mind, so the fact that the word ‘love’ is what jumped out of him says a lot of how much it has been consuming his every being, even in the face of death.

4. s;jgio;sejro;gisejro;igerj wtf sangwoo

...I...well. I mean, it’s a great parallel, I think. Bum’s desperation for love making him yell that as his last words, while Sangwoo’s desperation for that same love making him stop in his tracks and even...fucking pet Bum???  I dunno, lonely or not, that wouldn’t be the first response of a completely not-gay-straight-as-an-arrow man. But obviously, Bum is a cutie pie and can appear feminine, which is why Sangwoo didn’t automatically kill him. If Bum looked like a ‘man’, then there would seriously be no saving Bum. 

And I’m sure Koogi meant to emphasize Bum’s feminine attractiveness in that petting panel, maybe as a way to show what Sangwoo was seeing. I love how it’s purely white and blank behind Bum, as Bum is all Sangwoo is seeing. The fact that it’s white rather than black can suggest that Bum could be a new beginning, something pure and untainted.

I do kinda wonder if Koogi had Sangwoo as straight as a way to mitigate the stigma against homosexuality???  As a way for her to say “just because the story is between two men doesn’t mean this is supposed to be representative of homosexuality itself”.

5. Wow, the whiplash of mood and quick thinking

Boy didn’t even fkkn hesitate to destroy Bum’s legs, goddamn. 

However, this does show that Sangwoo is very aware and his mental faculties are intact, even during times like these. You think he’d be fkkn furious and lose it, beating Bum to death automatically before Bum could even say anything. But Sangwoo doesn’t. The moment Bum says “love”, he stopped. He wasn’t in a haze of fury...maybe excitement (especially with that goddamn terrifying smile as Bum runs up the stairs), but even that was controlled. 

In away, Sangwoo just seems...tired. He’s moving only because he knows he has to. 

Also, the moment he says “not with your legs the way they are”, Sangwoo sees Bum the same way he has seen the women who’ve also been in the basement. The CEO daughter girl also had broken legs, so obviously the first thing he does is ruin their legs so they don’t run away...which...yeah, smart. I actually haven’t seen that even with Criminal Mind. xD

So that does show that Sangwoo seems really set in keeping his prey with him. Not to ‘chain’ them or anything, but to keep them from leaving him. 

6. Double homicide

Ooooh 3 years ago?? Okay this is interesting...conscription age is 18 (or 17 since Koreans add that one year). I’m confused because, technically, Bum should’ve met Sangwoo first in the military, then in his college days. So did Sangwoo go to military later at age 20?  Could be since his mom is...yeah. And his dad...sure. 

Also, Bum and Sangwoo are four years apart. So say that Sangwoo went to college first, so Bum met Sangwoo when he was 22...then while Sangwoo was 20 and Bum was 24, they went into the military later. Since Sangwoo is 24 now (or 25 in Korean age jfc), that means he was 21 when his parents were killed. 

Sangwoo also seemed to have needed to be discharged early, most likely because of his sick mom, which would explain also why he was in no position to befriend Bum. 

Anyways, so that means Bum knew Sangwoo and was in love with him for about 6 years.

7. Wow

No wonder Sungbae is like this. He sees the eyes of every person he chased in Sungwoo’s dead-eyed stare. But he’s actually wrong about this, lol. Sungwoo’s mom is the culprit, technically, even though she was also a vicitm.

8. UHHHHHHH

HEY, SANGWOO, HEY, WHY IS BUM FKKN NAKED TO HIS UNDERWEAR WHAT THE HELL. WHY DID YOU UNDRESS HIM SANGWOO. HEY.  

Oh my god, wait, was that really Bum’s underwear or did Sangwoo put that on him??

Also, wow, Bum’s hips. He seriously has a feminine body. Like...pear body shape lol. 

Also, seriously, Sangwoo is treating Bum right off the bat like the other women. Rather than completely heterosexual, Sangwoo is more demisexual. And rather than femininity, he more prefers ‘weaker’ bodies, so that he doesn’t feel threatened by them. That is automatic towards females. 

9. Hmmmmn....

Ah, for this to be the first thing you fucking wake up to, jesus christ. xD

I wonder though, why did Sangwoo cut her hair short? There’s probably multiple reasons for it...but one theory I would find interesting is that it’s because he met Bum. 

Maybe he wanted to see how she looked like with a male haircut, how it would look like and compare how it felt like to see a pretty girl beside a pretty boy. He compared the two physically and made his decision that Bum was worth more than her.

I really do find it interesting that Sangwoo truly chose Bum over her, despite her being voluptuous and beautiful and actually a woman, which...you know...important for het men right. 

But Sangwoo chose Bum because even though Sangwoo went straight to beating him with a goddamn bat, Bum yelled “I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU”.

If the choice was between what’s between the person’s legs vs the person themselves, Sangwoo will choose the person.

10. Interesting insight

Into why Sangwoo killed her and his thought process.  Again, interesting, the fact that he kept emphasizing how stupid she was. 

Her screaming for help and stuff is a very natural reaction and no one should ever blame her for that. But, for Sangwoo, it was ridiculous because she should’ve known that would piss him off more rather than make him feel guilty. 

Part of it is how he learned to survive growing up--by reading his parents’ moods and figuring out how to respond. And on a smaller scale, how to respond to other people so that they see nothing but a charming, handsome man. The fact that she can’t even do 1/100th of that is fucking infuriating...and on a personal level, I can understand that frustration.

The other part is that her begging for mercy is obviously NOT what he wants. He wants someone like Bum, who’ll respond to him with loyalty and desire. Who won’t be afraid of him and will still stay to ease his loneliness. 

11. Uh

What kind of half-baked excuse was this, bro. You spared him only because of what he yelled out to you and you just don’t want to admit it to yourself...or maybe just don’t want to say it to Bum, so that you can control him better.

12. Women have hair too, asshole

Sangwoo really does try to feminize Bum throughout the whole story. So obviously, yes, his instinct is more hetero. If Bum were burly like a guy rather than delicate like a girl, there would be no saving him. Sangwoo has his preferences. And Bum fits the most important aspect--and that most important part isn’t Bum’s genitalia.

I also do think it has to do with social construct. Sangwoo most likely grew up internalizing misogynistic and homophobic belief systems, whether or not those are what he truly agreed with.

13. The first time Sungwoo snaps

Notable to mention that it’s because he sees Bum trembling in fear of him. Sangwoo doesn’t like being reminded of the monster he is. He doesn’t take pleasure in it. But because he knows that he’s unforgivable and can’t go back, he just makes the situation worse by further slipping into the skin of a monster.

Honestly, this might be more indicative towards what he witnessed with his father. He’s emulating his father’s qualities because he knows that he’s no better than him, and can’t handle that fact. He’s also locking up his women THE SAME WAY HIS FATHER DID TO HIS MOM. 

But, honestly, I think it’s because his mom is just as bad as his dad, that’s why he’s doing the same things as his dad.

14. You beat the girl

This is indicative of the fact that Sangwoo would be willing to be with Bum despite being a guy. And also suggests that, again, he really was comparing them and decides that Bum, with all his ‘loser’ like qualities, is still worthier than her. Heterosexual first, but demisexual overall.

And again, I think he’s doing the same things he has seen his father has done, pouring the food over Bum’s face like that.

15. First reward

Ah, here comes the training. 

Also, I can see how differently Bum responds compared to every single person he’s seen, including his mom. They all will feel humiliated and resentful, hateful towards Sangwoo, seeing him as a monster, or being completely defeated. But Bum, instead, responds exactly the opposite. This is exactly why I think Sangwoo decides to kiss Bum. 

Because, despite Sangwoo calling him a retard, that is exactly what Sangwoo wanted to see (but at the same time, not...Sangwoo doesn’t want someone as messed up as Bum, but he knows that only someone as messed up as Bum can be with him, and more than anything, he doesn’t want to be lonely). 

If Bum reacted with fear rather than desire, Sangwoo would’ve never kissed Bum.

This is also a huge catch-22 that will end up blowing up on both of them. Bum reacting like this will make Sangwoo feel better about his actions and like he was able to find the person who’ll be able to accept him for who he is. But in the long term, it will reinforce this behavior and truly make him into his father. It will also keep him from truly dealing with his past. 

16. Oh goddamn

Great insight into Bum’s mentality.  It’s amazing, also, that he sees this as a sign of ‘dating’.

What I find telling is that Bum is thinking this DESPITE SEEING PROOF OF HIM BEING A MURDERER. I do get that it could be from his dissociation from real life, so he doesn’t quite understand what is going on. But at the same time, really, if Sangwoo treated Bum better, then Bum would’ve been absolutely fine with him being a serial killer and even join him. I honestly do believe Bum is more of a natural-born murderer than Sangwoo (though Sangwoo is probably more of a natural asshole lol).

17. Why are you also mentioning the word date!?!?

And I’m not sure if Sangwoo senses that those are Bum’s thoughts, but he also is thinking about dating in this context??

I can see how Sangwoo could’ve ‘read’ his prey and responded in a way that would’ve messed with their heads, but at the same time, it could be that Sangwoo is looking at this situation in just as much a twisted way as Bum is. But rather than Bum’s “I’m disgusting, yet he’s kissing me” mentality, he’s more likely thinking “Kissing him isn’t disgusting, so he passes round 3″ (round 1 is the first time with the bat, round 2 is the one where he kills the girl instead of Bum).

The thing is, since Sangwoo didn’t find Bum’s kisses disgusting, it reinforces his desperation to keep Bum with him. If he didn’t like kissing Bum, then I truly believe Bum would’ve died right here and now.

Also, interesting: “You’ll be the only one that ends up hurt, you know?”  So, obviously, Bum having one working leg increases his chances of escape. So this is Sangwoo’s way of saying ‘if you escape, then I’ll make sure to hurt/kill you because of that’.

18. Here comes the sledgehammer

This is an interesting parallel. Looking back at chapter 1, it also seems like only one of the girl’s legs are broken, like how Bum’s leg was after falling down the steps. 

So to keep the girl from escaping, Sangwoo just most likely tied her up. It’s not full-proof and it limits her movements, but Sangwoo probably doesn’t give a shit because with how she’s acting, she wasn’t going to live much longer. 

But for Bum...with Bum, he’s planning to let him live much longer. He doesn’t want to restrict Bum’s movements because that makes him less appealing. Instead, Sangwoo takes it personally--takes it upon himself--to actually break Bum’s legs. This is a much more permanent fixture, reflecting how he’s planning to keep Bum with him for a much longer time. 

Also, now that I’m looking at this, I think Sangwoo doesn’t actually rape his victims. Yeah, he has molested the girl’s dead body, but I think that’s more of a curiosity towards a dead body than actual sexual interest. It’s natural after seeing his mom’s corpse in front of him and all that...screwed up as fuck jazz lol. 

I think he has sex with them in the beginning and that’s probably when he snaps because...his mom raped him, so. After that, he tortures them according to their reaction to him. But he probably doesn’t actually touch them more than that. In the case of hypersexuality, Bum fits this much more than Sangwoo does at this point. Sangwoo seems to just use it as a weapon, while Bum does it because he wants to be fucked. 

This makes sense because it seems like Sangwoo was raped once by his mom and probably molested the other times, while Bum was frequently raped.

Furthermore, Bum--as we’ll later see--is most likely the only one he truly does rape. 

#chapter 2 #volume 1

[25percentblind]

Have some flat thicc sangwoo getting ready to bake some shit bc he’s copying his mom

#oh jesus #im the worst #sangwoo #ks #killing stalking #somebody put a stop to me #im actually gonna do more bc I have to show the apron fully plus another apron design i have

[carmenlire]

im OBSESSED with your parents jangchu thoughts like YES i love this <3 and please take your time on the other ask no worries at all! the thought of sangwoo being good with kids makes my heart melt. thinking about sangwoo reasoning with a 8 year old is so cute and funny 🥺 and his kid is nodding along absorbing everything his dad says and jaeyoung just finding them in the midst of what seems like a business conversation 😭💖 (1/2)

+ and as their kid grows up they see how loving their parents are towards each other and wants a love like theirs 🤧 but when they hear their origin story theyre like 'that's impossible both of you are disgustingly in love' aslkdjf i also think jangchu would be the most protective and loving husbands/dads- if anyone messed with their family, they'd be eviscerated. if your jangchu parents series ever comes to fruition id LOVE to read it aaaaa. and if not, id love to hear all your ideas!! (2/2)

Okay, so I know I said I wouldn't be writing anything but-- I actually am in the midst of writing the park scene with the kid? I got to thinking about sangwoo and jaeyoung as parents and I went to my fic ideas google doc and wrote out what i would want and I think i'm gonna write a multichaptered fic that's a collection of oneshots all centered around the two of them with kids/as parents!

and IM GLAD YOU SEE THE VISION! I love the image of sangwoo treating his kids' concerns with the gravitas they deserve and he has these fully serious conversations with them when they're so young and he listens to them and you're so right-- it's like a whole business meeting and jaeyoung walks into the kitchen and is just soooo in love seeing his husband and six year old debate the merits of being allowed to go to a friend's for a sleepover next weekend. and that's actually a chapter/planned one shot!

I also have chapters for the kid's first crush and first heartbreak and I live for their kids seeing sangwoo and jaeyoung and growing up wanting that for themselves and as they get older, they realize just how lucky their dads are along with how much work goes into making their relationship what it is. i have a chapter maybe where the kid comes back home from college on a surprise trip and catches sangwoo and jaeyoung, like, making out during their weekly Date Night at home lmao.

and you KNOW they're both protective parents (though not! overprotective). i suddenly have a vivid image of jaeyoung at like a PTA bake sale and he actually has a rivalry with one of the moms and when she says something about him/them or whatever, he like puts her in her place. and when one of their kids is going through a breakup, jaeyoung has half a mind to go talk to the ex while sangwoo just freezes the kid out with his glaring (they get back together and the first time his kid's bf comes back over, sangwoo's silent treatment is almost too much to bear).

#i'm sooooooo happy you like my ideas!!!!! #and you get it!!!! #i was smiling so much at your message! #i hope you like whatever i end up doing :') #thank you for this!!!! #asked #answered #anon #semantic error #my writing tag #se anon