#quebecois tf

[fredwkong]

Himbo Maker: Jean

Jean was deep into muscle. Ever since he’d been the smallest kid in his class every year in school, he’d felt an intense need to someday become the kind of guy who could really dominate a room with his body.

However, even as an adult, he was still a little guy. He’d tried for years, but no matter what, his dark-skinned body stayed slender. So instead, he spent all his free time on forums dedicated to muscle growth, living vicariously through the experiences of others as they gained muscle and posted pictures.

One day he received an unusual message request from another guy on the forum. He’d never seen him in the threads before, but his username was Himbo_mkr so Jean assumed he was probably here for roleplay.

Techie_jean: Hey man. What’s up?

Himbo_mkr: Not much bro. Just been chilling and looking at pix of muscley dudes. I noticed you don’t make many posts. You good?

Techie_jean: Guess I’ve just never done the smart thing and gotten myself a plan.

Himbo_mkr: Brah, you don’t need a plan! I can help you get big in just a few minutes! Wanna give it a shot?

Jean chuckled. Yep, this guy was looking for some roleplay. He looked around his room. Well, it wasn’t like he had anything else to do this afternoon but play video games and build some Gundam. He may as well have some fun with this guy first.

Techie_jean: Sure! What do I have to do first?

Himbo_mkr: The first thing you gotta do is get dumb, bro! Muscles aren’t made with smarts, you need to have nothing in your brain but flexing, eating, and fucking to really build hot muscle.

Straight to the point, huh! Jean was about to type a message in character as a dummy when he felt a tingling in his head. His brain suddenly felt like it was full of cotton, he was having trouble putting thoughts together. Slowly, he made his fingers move. He had to really focus to string the words together.

Techie_jean: Bro… What’s happenin to me?

Himbo_mkr: You’re getting dumb, bro! When a guy gets really serious about getting big muscles, the power to do it comes from all of his useless brains! The smarter he was at the start, the bigger and dumber he ends up.

Jean… supposed that made sense? He couldn’t figure out how this guy could be wrong. He wasn’t really the smartest guy, after all. He scratched his head and looked around his room. It was like it was changing before his eyes, but that couldn’t be right either. No more video games, just a pile of gay muscle pornos. His gundam and other dolls replaced with sex toys and gear that he used to show off his skinny little body. Jean was definitely not smart by any means.

Dummy_jean: Yeah bro, I’m pretty stupid. What were we talkin about?

Himbo_mkr: Getting you swole, huhuhu! Now that you’ve drained your useless brain, your muscles are gonna get huge, bro! You’re a big thick muscle bro!

Jean gasped as an indescribable warm sensation overtook his whole body. With a crack, his back, arms, and legs extended, making him a towering beanpole of a man. His muscles started to vibrate, and then expand. His legs jerked as his quads and then his hamstrings inflated, and were quickly balanced by a thick, jiggly muscle ass. His pecs burst forth from his chest to form a sturdy shelf, and then his back thickened along with his lats, belly, and growing arms.

Looking around, Jean took in the changing space. There was a new dent in his dirty mattress from his huge body, and a weight bench and rack in the corner. Of course, he had to lift all day every day to keep up his bulk. The walls and ceiling were covered in pictures of all Jean’s favourite bodybuilders, his inspiration and his jerk material.

Dumbro_jean: Whoa, bruh, my muscles are gettin huge!

Himbo_mkr: That’s not all, bro! That thick Quebecois cock of yours is keeping up too!

Quebecois? Jean was a bit dumb, sure, but he was pretty sure he’d grown up in Atlanta… Quebec City, right. His dick lengthened and lightened at the same time, and the pale skin tone rushed over his still-growing body. A healthy layer of fat followed, leaving him looking absolutely enormous. Above the blond behemoth’s bed, a Quebec flag unfurled on the wall, showing his national pride.

Jean could barely remember who he’d been before. He knew he’d been smaller… smarter? He’d been American. The idea that he’d so quickly become this huge pale Quebecois stud had him grunting and palming his dick. Soon he was close, cursing quietly in his deep new Quebecois accent.

QC_jean: Calisse, bro, gonna cum!

Himbo_mkr: Yeah brah! Shoot that musky hockey bro load.

Hell yeah! Jean grabbed a used athletic jock that had just appeared next to him. He remembered: he’d worn it for practice this morning, and it was still warm and wet with his sweat. He loved being on the ice, and being around a whole team of big, dumb, sweaty Quebecois hockey players meant he was always leaking in his jock. He held the pouch up to his nose to inhale the musk of his sweat and precum permeating the jock.

His whole room was ripe with used hockey bro gear. Jean hated cleaning any of his equipment while he was on a points streak, and it’d been a few weeks since he’d failed to score in a game. The hockey stuff scattered on the floor was ripe with stale sweat. Being a hockey bro was so fucking hot.

Jean’s thick cock unleashed a torrent of cum as he continued to curse in Quebecois. When he came down, he gave himself a sniff and looked back at his battered old laptop. It was only good for porn and surfing forums, but a bro like him didn’t need it for anything else.

Right now, the browser was open to one of his favourite sports jock forums. He had a post all ready to go, a pic of him after the last game, half undressed in his sweaty gear with his hair stuck to his face, looking like a perfect dumb hockey bro. Quickly, Jean also snapped a picture of his spent dick and sent it to his friend.

Hockey_jean: Include this too?

Himbo_mkr: Definitely, bro! You love showing off your hockey himbo body.

Yeah, this guy was right about everything. No one loved to show off that he was a hot hockey bro for the bros more than Jean.

Inspired by a chat with a bot of my own creation. Format inspired by Codename: Bear_mkr by @biggerchanger

#himbo maker #himbofication #dumber tf #hockey player tf #musk tf #race change #quebecois tf #male transformation #reality change #chat tf #male tf #all fwkong #sports tf

[maryeve-the-bitch]

No one:

Québec: You put shredded cheese on poutine?? You put that disgusting inferior mediocre cheese on MY CREATION? Oh! Oh! Jail for the anglophones! Jail for the anglophones for one thousand years!

#miette meme #quebecois be like #gatekeeping poutine #relax man it's just another form calm tf down #aph quebec #hws quebec

[bereft-of-frogs]

had my first in-my-face anti-vaccine encounter tonight wooooooo

#i went for the manager in 5 seconds flat i could not be bothered #apparently thats when he started cussing me out #and then going to other tables and being like ‘you dont believe in this bullshit do you?’ and then we kicked him tf out #also funny he tried to claim to be from ny as if being from out of country would get him a pass #but then he cursed me and the manager out in super quebecois french lol #and had a quebec id #though he was waving around us money like it was special #so what is the truth #anyway that was funnnn

[shadowkat2000]

why tf are there currently more projected bloc quebecois than ndp??? seriously people???

#canada #canadian election #canadian election 2019 #ndp #ughhh #riannon's dumb text posts

[countingnothings]

i need to shriek a little about the director of my organisation, and this space is as close to anonymous as i am on the internet, so! 

in mtl over the past very long time, this one statue of sir john a. macdonald (first prime minister and genocidal asshole, almost universally hated even in his own time) has been the subject of many, many, many calls for dismantling. naturally, because we love racists, and somehow have not tapped into the franco-quebecois rage that still lingers over the way sir john hated the french, neither municipal nor provincial authorities have ever agreed to take him tf down. as a result, he’s been spray painted a variety of colours, given fun accessories, and had bits of him removed, but recently he was toppled completely and his head removed. hurrah! of course, every white milquetoast politician in this godforsaken country has weighed in with horror, conveniently ignoring the fact that people have been trying to have him removed by “legal”/”legitimate” means for years! of course, literally everyone who is not a white milquetoast politician has been like “fucking finally,” and has moved on with their lives.

meanwhile, my organisation has been working through how we respond to the increased media focus and popular attention paid to racism this past summer (long overdue, naturally; there’s a lot of white supremacy in the dna of this place). our director is in the process of composing a public statement about the work we’ve been doing the past few months and our position on anti-racism as a religious organisation. because i am a loud person, who has been yelling about this kind of thing pretty consistently and without too much regard for organisational hierarchy, i got asked to proofread the statement.

i objected to some things in the original (e.g. why are we talking about policing in the us when there’s plenty of police violence to talk about in canada?), including his use of the word “vandalism” to describe the recent triumphant beheading of sir john’s statue. i want to copy his response here because there’s a difference between knowing that the people in leadership in your organisation have a long way to go in unlearning their allegiance to white supremacy and state violence, and seeing first-hand just how far that way is.

“As much as it is a loaded term, toppling the statue was not a part of the intended protest (as far as I am aware). It was unlawful, and condemned across the board. If I were the organizers, I would be frustrated to plan an otherwise peaceful protest, and for this action to have transpired. When tensions rise, and there is no political or social progress, vandalism and riots result. “Riots are the language of the unheard” as MLK Jr. said. As much as that is true and real. This was vandalism. It did not come from peace. It came from a lack of peace and a lack of progress towards peace.”

real talk: this is super bullshit. i) yep, toppling the statue was part of the goal of the protest! so do your recherches bro. ii) “unlawful” is not a synonym for “wrong”! iii) symbolically killing sir john has been condemned by people who also produce and support racist legislation, but not by people actually committed to anti-racism! iv) the organisers are among the people happy that sir john was returned to his rightful place, i.e. the ground! v) protests are by their nature peaceful, if we use Rev Dr Martin Luther King Jr’s definition of peace as “the presence of justice”! vi) invoking the aforementioned good reverend and then fully ignoring his point is just...why...shut the fuck up... vii) just because something is the result of a lack of progress toward peace does not make it bad!!! 

i’m simultaneously having a private discussion with this dude about his use of “non-whites” in a post publically praying for a world without the fear of violence, and i’m just...wondering if our organisation is going to move forward at all with this kind of person in leadership? 

and reminded of the wisdom of EbonyJanice Moore, whose reminder that white urgency is violence sits with me every day. it helps me to refocus in moments like this and to say, the work of anti-racism is long and hard and relational, and it involves being patient enough to travel alongside someone like this guy who just like aggressively does not get it, and it involves turning inward and asking: in what parts of my life do _I_ aggressively not get it? who is travelling alongside me, and how can I move in a way that honours their patience?

#long post #personal #casual racism

[despazito]

who tf voting bloc quebecois in 2019

[bazypitchandsimonsnow]

1, 26, 29 💕

1. three songs that come up when you put your phone on shuffle"One Point Perspective” by Arctic Monkeys, “Run for Your Life” by Bullet for My Valentine, and “The Jetset Life is Gonna Kill You” by My Chemical Romance. Wow lots of long song titles at the start lol

26. three favourite non-English songs“Recuérdame“ by Carlos Rivera, “Dayenu” by just people singing at passover, and “Bonhomme, Bonhomme” by who tf knows, probably some bored amazing Quebecois person.

29. three songs that influenced you most (some songs change or save lives)Oh jeez that’s hard. Um, “Don’t Stop Me Now” by Queen because it made me fall in love with Queen. “Blackbird” by The Beatles because I grew up with that song as a lullaby so it influenced me to love music in general. And finally, “Secret Love Song Pt. II” by Little Mix because it was the first song I heard that was LGBT+ centred.

Thank you for asking

[wanghedi]

Oooh i need to get this ouy but 名侦探学院 main cast count down by fuckability:

7. 邵明明 - i love him and his ncredibly bad temper and attitude sometimes and is so dramatic all the time but he is gay

6. 唐九州- is a compci student but not the biggest problem as u can see thete are business majors higehr up yhe list but jojo is low bc he looks like a baby a toddler a child if u will

5. 石凯 - we love skdd but hnot my type

4. ggg - i think hes in fact the better looking of the 2 finance majors hes really good looking for a normal non celeb person like i cany imagine working in the same office as this guy and and suddently hes on tv in tv hair and makeup and u see him on bilibili being called 妹妹 and 老婆lmao its like if someone tld u yeah did u guys see stephen from HR is being babygirlified and malewifefied on tv djwkldk

3. 齐思均: he looks like a nice guy ; probably a really good roommate abd friend. He really does remund me of 何炅 like the vibe and hosting style and like. Such a good host... I cant believe the first time i saw him mc the dilf show i was like who the tf isthis rando but he won me over even before i watched mztxy bc he hosted so many things. And well! He gets so much mc work these days hes got all the hosting gigs i feel like a proud mpther when i see him mc a major gala omg our very own ,齐岱泽 our 齐妈

2. Zjw... A half frog from montearel....but he is tall.... But he seems like a mainsplainer and isa psych major... But he is tall.... .but double psych major...but Probably the most widely acvepted best looking from this cast but. Again. A quebecois

1. ppp - the vast and rocketlike improvemeny in ranking for pyx... He was genuinely a lil ugly to me thw first ep i watched but he has won mw over. The power of a funny litle guy..and ithink his voice is reallynice even tho he has a borderline comedic 四川 accent sometime and i like his vibes like this guy is a little kooky like a manic pixie girl and he is my favourite yes evn tho he is a finace major (but no longer works in finance so a point there) and just a guy who sometimes on tv and plays a lot of video games

#helllllllo #helllwo #i am going to sleep #edit from 12 hr later: going thru my posts from last night and tagging them like wow who said this #sidney talks shit

[maryeve-the-bitch]

My favourite things about my favourite sci-fi tv series as a teen growing up is that they made Canada a super power country in the future and all the crew, aliens and everyone speaks French which means

1. USA felt down

2. English is no longer the language most used.

3. Canada were probably the only ones to survive or the one of the few to survive.

4. The UK probably got flooded into the ocean, forced to move to France and speaks French.

5. Australia is probably gone as well.

6. We managed to make the aliens speak Quebecois french.

7. Idk what TF happened to the English Canadians but lol Good job.

#dans une galaxie près de chez vous #dugpdcv #its canon