#one fucking jackass on twitter like four years ago said 'yeah amab enbies only exist until they can pass as girls'

[abalidoth]

me out loud: yeah im a radical queer descriptivist. words and labels are just tools we use to understand ourselves, man, holding them as "rules" is against the ethos of queerness.

me in my brain: i am literally the only transfem enby in the history of ever who doesn't id as a trans woman or feel comfortable with she/her, it's just a phase for every single other one, nobody understands me and I am going to Die

#this fuckin insecurity augh #one fucking jackass on twitter like four years ago said 'yeah amab enbies only exist until they can pass as girls' #and that fucking lodged itself in my brain stem in a way ive not completely been able to undo in my moments of baser emotions #every time a they/them i know changes to they/she or whatever there's a dumbass imp in my brain that starts screaming BETRAYAL #it's an asshole and i try to beat it with a shoe whenever it shows up but it's never quite gone #god im a jackass sometimes:/ #ok gonna delete this later prolly