#of crazy powerhungry bitches | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

markantonys · 3 years

Note

I saw how you mentioned Livilla. Wasn’t she killed by her mother Antonia minor since she was a murderer. She killed her husband alongside her lover Sejanus. She also was part of the exile of her sister in law, Agrippina the elder. Tbh I hate Livilla, she was a crazy person who enjoyed murdering people

first of all there's no way of knowing whether livilla ACTUALLY killed her husband or whether it was just period-typical "bitches be crazy" accusations (much like those slung at livia). after all, her husband was tiberius's heir and thus livilla would've been a shoe-in for next empress of rome and her son for emperor after drusus, so why would she risk it all to kill drusus, marry a guy who was a huge step down status-wise, and hope sejanus would be able to finagle his way into the line of succession? if she really was as ambitious and powerhungry as ancient writers claim, then there's no way she would've done something like that. plus, drusus's death was regarded as due to natural causes at the time, and only 10 years later was livilla accused of poisoning him - by sejanus's wife right after his downfall and their children's brutal murders, and she could easily have just blamed livilla for sejanus divorcing her and her children's deaths and her family's disgrace, and was trying to take livilla down with her.

second of all, me @ all crazy roman women who enjoyed murdering people

#livilla suffered just the same fate as julia and agrippina: julio-claudian woman who was too independent and was punished for it #but the pro-julian anti-claudian agenda of the historical record ensured livilla was remembered as a villain and the others as victims #answered #anonymous

9 notes · View notes

selfreflectionsnepal · 3 years

Text

Self reflections

Since i have been here in Nepal and as soon as i announced my plans to go, i have had people telling me they are jealous of me, my standard response to this is “i understand that, you are very welcome to come join me.” Which is followed up with a whole variety of excuses. i have heard it all, i can't because: “iI need to do school”, “I need to work”, “But what about Covid”, “It is hard to get a visa”, “I can't afford it”. Ofcourse these are hurdles, I do undertand that, but especially in the west we are so privilaged that these are often easily solved. So sometimes it frustrates me a little when they say they wish were here with me, for i would love for them to be, and see this version of myself that they might not know. To spend the mornings walking in the jungle and the evenings meeting the most extraordinary kind and unbelievably open people imaginable.

The way i see it there is really two options here, they either don't really want to be here in sunny paradise with me. Or, option two, they genuinely believe it is not an option for them. The first i am very understanding of, some people prefer the comfort of their own homes, the luxury state of living that the Netherlands provides us with, there is absolutely no shame in this. The second on the other hand bothers me, i want the best for these people, i know how miserable lockdown is making people, many of my friends are seriously struggling to maintain some form of sanity. Don't get me wrong here either, i am not one to shy away from a good bout of craziness, but their mind is deteriorating, it does not seem to be contributing to their life in a good way.

Often i have told people that if they are not happy with their lives they should look at it, analyse it, figure out what is making them unhappy, and see if there is a solution for it. Sometimes there is not(think for example the loss of a loved one), the world throws difficulties on our plate and it is up to us to make peace with this, which can be a long and difficult process. More often than not however, there is solutions readily available. This however requires admitting to yourself that you are the source of your own misary, and facing this angers people (so does pointing it out, as experience has taught me).

Of course it is not always smooth sailing even when following this philosophy, i am not a zen master who has found complete peace, who can accept the world for what it is at all points. i make mistakes, i get frustrated with myself and my failures. For example eating that egg-dish i had a bad feeling about yesterday which led to me throwing up all night, can't say i am feeling pleased about this belleache of mine. Though even this has presented me with the oppertunity and time frame to do my uni work in a way that genuinely interests me, instead of just gerugitating facts, which at this point i am so over doing. There is ofcourse much to learn from the bright minds of the past, but often when i long for it to give my own opinion, i am not supposed to, which leads to my grades being... well let's just say they could be better. I feel like often what i am saying is not even looked at in a serious manner, and that i am just being judged on my lack of form, my lack of sticking to the assignments, but i simply refuse to change. Not that i couldn't do the way i am supposed to, it would not be too hard getting better grades, but i would find no joy or passion in this, so if that means i don't graduate so be it, i will make the university ashamed of it out of pure mischievous spite. I am horribly bright, but also horribly stubborn, a trait that has been birthed from me being right more often than not, imagine in what hilarious situations this results when others actually make a good point, my giant ass ego is not to pleased about that, but i love that, i love bullying my ego, i love being proven wrong, and therefor love the people who actually have the balls to challange me in a serious manner, who actually listen to the intentions behind my words, though they are sometimes clouded and hard to explain, for they have made a lot of sense to me for a long time. So the process of deeping this out with another person, to see if there is any fundamental differences, is just incredibly beautiful to me.

I would love to be able to write in a way where i can also make people who don't deep this out understand what i am trying to say as well, but to deep out all the concepts and cryptic messages i tend to drop in my essays and personal writings would be a ridiculous amount of work, so i haven't quite figured out yet how and if and how to go about having a comprehensive layer of deeper meaning, and still speak about niche subjects.

Aside from being an obnoxious prick there is also other stuggles that I have been trying to learn to accept. I get incredibly lonely for example, a side effect from being a bit of a weirdo who got lost in the void. Here again i know i could probably solve this by living a normal life, find me a good man, job and some kids. But i am not willing to do this, for i want to live an extroardinary life, and for now i have not found a way to make these coincide, and at this point i fear there might not be (which is also possibly me putting up another wall, but sometimes we have to wholeheartedly believe and live something before we can realise how incredibly wrong we were. Maybe not a nececary process but one i enjoy nonetheless).

Reflecting on this it feels unfair of me to be in any judgement of people who believe they are stuck where they are, be it in sadness, insanity or a physical place. For maybe the process is a beautiful one, i get a lot of fun out of looking at the person i used to be, how silly and lost i was, and i am sure in 20 years i will feel the same about me now. It is exciting to think about what i might become, all the possible paths, the endless, or maybe seemingly potentiality of my life. I have been gifted a life full of options, i feel very blessed in this. I want to hold the hand of these options (there is too many to choose from, so i have started the impossible mission of doing all of them) and have them guide me somewhere beautiful.

The best way to make the lives of those who i love better is by making myself better, so i guess that is what I'm doing now. It is kind of strange, for what i am doing is completely selfish, but I want to become the best version of myself. And to do that, I need to make my mistakes, for that is the way i love to learn deep in my soul. (It also leads to some good ass stories, stories are something i believe to be at the foundation of humanity, both on a personal and communal level). I didn't however feel the freedom to make these mistakes at home. I don't want them to negatively impact those around me. And also in a more egotistical sense, the people at home have quite a good image of who Iris is, and i didn't wnat to destroy that, pure arrogance that is. But here in this hippie town i got lost in i can be who i want, even if i want to be a grumpy bastard, a hopeless romantic, a gangsters wife, a poet, an artist, an intellectual, a singer, a lover, a friend, a rebel, a small time criminal, a powerhungry bitch or a tired sad cunt with a bellyache. I can try out all these faces, and maybe at some point i will find one, or a combination of ones that suit me. Or maybe i am all of these. I don't feel static, to quote one of my favorite poems “My mother always told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing to north.” So for now i'll wonder about this earth, that is where I am happiest for now, and that for me has been the most important thing for a long time. The moving, and the change nurtures my growth. And If i return at some point i hope to inspire, not for people to follow my path, for everyone needs to find their own, but to inspire being unafraid. Unafraid of the future, which I can at this point say I mostly am. But also unafraid of the past, to not be haunted by the things that have occured, to practice forgiveness of the self and through this forgiveness of others. But babysteps, first i will turn inward, hide away in my cocoon, in hopes that one day i'll birthed a beautiful butterfly.

1 note · View note

malandi · 4 years

Text

VENT school tw abuse tw justtt about teache4s being abusive to kids

honestly now. is it the helplessness of these kids that have authority figures going crazy like that? in college none of the profs do that throwing tantrums shit likely because the students know their rights or are willing to throw some punches. if a professor threw a blackboard eraser at my head the way my elementary teachers used to i wouldve leapt over their desk and snapped their head clean off their neck. i just wish they'd fucking try that! but when i was a kid that happened so regularly it barely even registered.

so what, does a person have to be threat for authority figures to treat them with respect? but am i surprised that powerhungry people end up in positions of authority over vulnerable people? i really think there should be a higher priority on character instead of skills when giving power to people. idgaf if this bitch is albert einstein reincarnated, if theyre shitty and egotistic i am not letting them in my little sisters classroom, much less a principal or a dean.

anyway im thinking about this again because of onlime classes, i could see just how fucking insane my little sisters teachers are. they cant even look around. one of her classmates got scolded for 30 fucking minutes for looking around, and another kid because someone passed behind him.

they cant EAT. they are in their fucking houses and they cant EAT? "because its a distraction" dont give me that bullshit, no ooooneeee is distracted by other people eating. we eat with each other every fucking day! and their mics are muted by default so they cant even hear the eating noises? and it makes even less sense because they have to ask permission to go to the bathroom. THATS what counts as a distraction, kids have to interrupt the lecture to ask permission! but the teachers require it?!?!?!?! so what, are distractions allowed or not? the obsession with controlling these kids is driving me fuvking nuts!

my little sister hasnt gotten scolded yet but if she is, i am cussing these teacher bitches out so bad theyre going to hear my voice in their head when they go to sleep at night. i want them to call for backup. i want the principal's ugly abusive fucking face showing up on that zoom screen so i can see her when she starts crying. these kids are 16 they know their swears so i dont feel the need to hold back lmfaoo

#vent

0 notes

dianaatrevor · 7 years

Note

Wow...what do you think of Cersei then?

lol, Cersei is the villain I love to hate.

She's THE Mad Queen. She's powerhungry, paranoid, obsessed with control and there is no doubt in my mind that she is a villain (the narrative treats her a such imo).

What I find interesting about Cersei is that she's the author of her own misery. The prophecy that has been haunting her since she was a child is basically a self fulfilling one, as her children have been lost to her due to her own actions and she will ultimately be killed by one of her brothers, either because she's hated them and nearly got them killed ( Tyrion ) or because her madness will drive them to stop her once and for all ( Jaime ).

I'm one of those who do not believe that the prophecy has been completely fulfilled yet. She still has two things she cares about that haven't been taken from her by "the younger Queen" : power and Jaime.

Cersei has always been obsessed by power, that is incontestable. Even her own children ( whom she loved very much ) were more considered as an extension of herself that she could use as a tool through which she could have access to power ( as opposed to considering her children as their own individuals with their own desires ). Look at what happened to Tomen. There was absolutely no need for Cersei to try to get rid of Margery. But she couldn't stand the fact that didn't have any control over her son anymore and so his new wife had to go. Which led to Tomen's suicide. And even then Cersei sees this act as a betrayal and not as something that she caused herself.

Honestly her storyline is one of the things I look foward the most. I was afraid that she wasn't going to last long after Dany's arrival ( what with her impressive army and her even more impressive dragons ) but she's proven that she's still a major pawn of the game and should not be underestimated. And I can't wait to see what line she's going to cross that will have Jaime turn his back on her.

The thing about Cersei is that she's played by a fabulous actress who manages to infuse some humanity in the character ( as opposed to book Cersei whose paranoia knows no bounds ) so even tho I know she's a crazy bitch who needs to be put down, I can't help but feel sorry for her sometimes.

#anti cersei

4 notes · View notes