#ocd and driving

[waitingforthesunrise]

Moment of appreciation for all drivers out there with OCD. The intrusive thoughts. The way the steering wheel isn’t straight. The uneven muscle use. Whatever it hits you with — I am giving you a little bouquet of flowers. You are loved <333

#ocdawareness #ocd tag #living with ocd #ocd and driving #ocd awareness #actually ocd

[samdeancrimespree]

very small detail in mystery spot… but the very first tuesday sam goes to brush his teeth and there’s toothpaste like all over the tube and it’s mostly empty. and he looks at dean like “seriously?” and dean shrugs. then after dean dies, during the montage of sam living alone on his revenge mission, there’s a shot of him brushing his teeth and the toothpaste tube is clean. the trunk is organized, the photos on the wall are lined up, the guns are spotless, the bed is made. the toothpaste tube is clean. dean was always the one who made the motel room a home, made it messy, made it lived in. there’s no mess. there’s no dean. sam doesn’t know how to do that. he’s never needed to. maybe never even noticed that’s what dean was doing; he was too busy complaining about his dirty clothes being everywhere.

it is so extremely codependent how sam’s ocd behaviours spike when dean is gone. like dean is his emotional support animal. “we keep each other human” in a very non-supernatural way. sam can only function on a normal level if he knows dean is ok. no one and nothing can drag sam out of that spiral other than dean, because there’s no reason to get out of the spiral if dean isn’t there. sam calls dean selfish for making the deal not because sam wouldn’t do the same thing, but because the prospect of living without dean is hell to him.

#UAGH and then at the end he looks at the two unmade beds #he is so mentally unwell #the codependency brothers <3 #that isn’t rlly how ocd works but go with it #it drives me so crazy how it seems like sam doesn’t even tell him… #he doesn’t want to have dean worry about him #when he just needs to focus on making sure dean doesn’t die #samdean #obsessive sam #mars.txt #liveblogging from mars #s3 #psychotically irrationally erotically

[rivertigo]

i got skin picking ocd instead of keeping a clean and tidy room ocd

#on a serious note the pop psychology view of ocd is what made me completely rule it out when trying to figure out what my problem was #on an unserious note my room is so horribly messy and dusty and terrible it’s ruining me #can’t bring myself to clean but the filth still drives me insane. whatever

[gravecats]

Fucking hate it when people on tiktok are like “Omg haha dyed my hair blue! I let my intrusive thoughts win”

If my intrusive thoughts won I’d turn into the unabomber but. Yknow. I’m glad the worst yours get is “dye your hair blue”

#ocd #actually ocd #fucking drives me nuts #that’s an IMPULSIVE THOUGHT #not an INTRUSIVE THOUGHT #AAGGGHHHH #kat’s meow #also mine are usually more tame but every now and then I get one that’s so bad I basically want to rip my hair out

[gremlinwithakeyboard]

Stuff I use regularly that's technically not a mobility aid but sure help me get places I otherwise wouldn't be able to

Bicycle - Fairly obvious one. Gets me to the shops fast without killing my legs like walking or driving would. I can even lean on it when I'm walking with it to still take weight off my questionable knees!

Noise cancelling headphones - Going out used to be a pain for the whole family because you can only spend so long out when you don't know where the next "safe" toilet is. The world opened up so much more to me when I no longer had to worry about extractor fans and hand dryers.

Long sleeved shirt/jacket - Contamination OCD freaking sucks but fortunately I've got it mild enough that if I cover my hand while touching stuff like buttons and door handles my brain doesn't go too crazy. So it's useful to have something with nice long sleeves I can retreat my hands into. I'd use gloves but they make my hands feel uncomfortable.

Bottle of hand sanitizer - Similar to the above one. Sometimes I'm having a bit of An Episode™ and everything is extra dirty or I dropped something on The Ground and can't just leave it somewhere until my brain forgets it's supposed to be toxic. Squirting a ton of gel onto the offending hand/object is a lot quicker and easier than retreating to the nearest bathroom to go clean it, and most of the time it's enough to keep The Thoughts at bay.

A solid pair of walking/military/safety boots - Combined with my arch supports, I can manage a bit more walking without totally killing my legs. I think it's the ankle support? With black leather military ones I can even wear them with formal wear under a long enough pair of trousers. They're not so fun when it's hot, but while I can function on a pair of trainers, walking boots are my usual everyday shoe. My latest pair even have hooks at the top instead of lace holes so I can either have them as slipon trainers with extra ankle if I'm going cycling or for a long car ride, or I can quickly lace them up all the way if I'm going walking. I was absolutely spoiled by a pair of leather safety boots I got a year or so ago. When they were new, I could walk to the morrisons on the other side of town and back and the only pain I had was from tying the laces too tight. Unfortunately the leather stretched and the boots got too big.

Not sure why I made this post, just wanted to ramble about it for a while. Feel free to add stuff!

#random thoughts with gremlin #ocd #chronic pain #contamination ocd #not gonna tag ADHD on this one since aside from the ear defenders thing none of these really apply to that? #I mean riding a bike is a lot less taxing on my brain than driving a car too #unitypunk

[okkennymay]

Speaking of said dad, he went on a lil mini 10 day holiday across the country to Perth to sight see nature and go on a boat ride to see some Orcas (he's retired, it's his way of getting out the house and not turning into an old man potato, and comes back with hundreds of photos of landscapes, plants and flowers and points of historical interests to show my Mum and I, with cool facts and stories in a slideshow~)

Unfortunately i was still sick at the time and didn't get the chance to join my mum in dropping him off at the airport, let alone the chance to give him a big 'ol hug before he left- so I drew him this 💖

You can't escape the 'Ken hugs.

#fun fact I actually have mild OCD when it comes to hugs especially with family members #sometimes they have to deal with me hugging them many times over until its right #and if I don't hug them before they leave I get anxious as hell #it used to be to the point of panic attacks- my brain would tell me because I didn't hug them they will die before I see them again #and they would never know how much I love them #Family gatherings are a hug fest- my family and their partners know the moment I bust through the door I must run the circuit #everyone gets hugged and neither of us have a choice in the matter #at least it's hugs and not something else like turning on and off the lights a number or times or closing and opening doors or some such #sure hug OCD sounds nice but when it's been like 5 minutes and 15 hugs it's not fun for either party-it's better these days but it took wor #or running out the door to your sisters car because the hug wasn't right and they're about to drive off and if I don't catch them in time- #-I'd cry for hours feeling dread and anxiety down to my bones until i end up sick and in bed- that's not so nice #the brains a bitch

[ven-of-the-valley]

Okay… so maybe this is a neurodivergence thing, but I genuinely do not understand how people can go places without headphones.

Like, I’m a college student, and when I’m walking from class to class there are so many people just… not listening to anything…

Or, like, when I see fellow students walking to the bus. Walking in silence. When I’m on the bus. Nothing.

My headphones died once before school, so I was charging them on the way to class, but I couldn’t have them on the bus and it was miserable. You’re telling me people just prefer silence to their own music? Or a podcast? Or anything?

#neurodivergent #neurodiversity #neurodivergence #neurospicy #autism #actually autistic #ocd #neurotypicals are weird #like you’re telling me you can actually stand the million noises around you at once? #and you actually prefer that to your music??? #you WANT to walk without music??? #it’s like people who drive in silence #red flag my guy

[aphroditestummyrolls]

Moodboard for the Engagement Series because I’m trying to distract myself from My Thoughts™️

#six of crows #shadow and bone #grishaverse #wesper #wylan van eck #jesper fahey #the engagement series #my ocd is driving me insane today

[theresistanceneverquits]

Hi I was having a relationship ocd episode so I decided to project onto some characters to cope and ended up with this exchange that is lowkey rewriting my brain patterns:

“I don’t feel…deserving of love.”

“I’m sorry. But that’s not up to you, is it.”

“No, I guess not.”

#rocd #relationship ocd #ocd #rsd #rejection sensitive dysphoria #personal #us thinking that there’s no way people can love us #or seeing no reason why anyone SHOULD #but people do anyway #and it drives us crazy #because why whY WHY DO YOU FEEL THIS ABOUT ME #it’s irrational #but just realizing #it isn’t up to us to decide whether we’re worth loving #we can only accept that love when it is given to us

[famewolf]

speaking of ocd, I think I'm realizing that I truly don't have anxiety and it's literally just my ocd. im not anxious about anything until it involves me and suddenly I'm spiraling

#[static] #it's hard to describe succinctly but the anxiety I deal with nowadays is directly related to my ocd and autism #some anxiety is so easy to brush off but the ones stemming from my ocd are extremely difficult to get out from under #i'll spiral for weeks about one specific thing and ruminate on it and mentally worry and pick at it forever #it's utterly exhausting jfkdghdf some days are easier than others #and often that one thing I ruminate on becomes multiple things all stemming from the first thing #like recently it's been my car ... the thing is totally fine ... runs fine drives fine but ive been freaked out by it for the last 3 weeks #every time i go into the shop theyre like ... everything is good in fact its in good condition for its age and they'll mention like #one thing that will need to be replaced to keep it in tip top condition and then my brain will fixate on it and imagine all the ways #something horrific will happen if that doesnt get changed and then that leads to all the other things in the car suddenly freaking me out #i defs used to have general anxiety and depression but those went away literally the day i got top surgery #poof instantly gone it was wild and i kept waiting for the other shoe to drop #never did but now my ocd has been really bad the last 6 months cuz of all the extra horrifying things going on #so i thought it was just my anxiety coming back but this week i realized it was my ocd and have been treating it accordingly #and ive seen some relief but i definitely need to go back to therapy once i get my insurance again #its the only way to get a hold on it and my last therapist ended up moving states so we didnt get to work on tools for it very much #im yapping at this point i just needed to vent for a second about how truly yucky ocd makes me feel

[thehellsystem]

People will be like “Being ableist is real. REBLOG REBLOG NOW IMMEDIATELY REBLOG OR YOU SUCK WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU UF YOU DON’T REBLOG???” And think they’ve made a great post

#ableism #I have ocd so these posts drive me crazy

[akashicrecord]

Y'all ever been so stressed you just start cooking ground beef with no end goal

#every time my bf makes the drive to georgia I feel like someones going to fatally rear end him i love OCD

[starredforlife]

why are you philosophically opposed to time travel?

oh it’s not for other people it’s just for me . I’m philosophically opposed to quite a few strange things due to the moral ocd it causes me sometimes to even consider it lmfao

But uhhh it’s like. I’ve made my choices. If I go back in time, esp with the knowledge of what happens in the future, there’s no way I could keep it a secret. I would feel weird talking to people who aren’t at my level of age n maturity. I would feel weird having relationships again with people that have found and terminated their course. It would be unfair to others but also to myself? I feel like it nulls the lessons I’ve learned to choose to go back. Makes them meaningless. I don’t think I could handle the responsibility of the knowledge of the future I honest to god think it would drive me clinically insane. There’s too much choice in the matter. And I don’t want to fix things because I think it’ll lead to another different problem, most likely. But if I was forced to go back I know at least I’d try to be kinder. At the end of the day that’s the most important thing. If I survive the mindfuck of it all

#star’s asks #silvermarmoset #I cannot emphasize enough that I have rules in my head for myself that I don’t really expect anyone else to abide by and it already does #drive me a little to the edge. not in the fun way. #and sometimes when the moral OCD is really bad I do start trying to ask other people to reinforce it which is bad that’s The Mental Illness #but not with time travel I would have to be in a really weird place to chide someone abt that

[trans-cuchulainn]

hi! we dont know each other but ive stumbled upon your posts in which you describe your anxiety brain and borrowing trouble from the future and i can totally relate to that. and it sounds a lot like ocd, which i know i have... idk if this would be helpful

sometimes i do see things about ocd that i relate to. i think a lot of the underlying thought patterns and fears are probably similar. i don't think i respond to them in the way that somebody with ocd does, though -- i don't experience compulsions and don't find any relief from behaving in certain ways or performing certain rituals, i just experience profound dread and physical discomfort until i'm able to forget about the thing that triggered the anxiety or i move on to something else

my sister has ocd, which i only learned recently (we don't live together and aren't super close), but again, although i see overlap between our experiences, i think we respond to those triggers differently and find different things helpful/harmful. obviously everyone is different so that doesn't rule out the possibility that i'd also have it, but i think it makes it less likely

generally i think my issues are largely attributable to generalised anxiety disorder, some kind of brainweirds (not sure if autistic or have adhd or both), and a solid dose of complex trauma that contributes a fair amount of hypervigilance and fear to the proceedings which make standard anxiety tactics less helpful

i think all mental health diagnoses are labels we give to certain groups of symptoms rather than like. firmly grouped Conditions between which there can be no overlap, though. some aspects of anxiety and ocd are very similar, and some are different -- the same stars in different constellations. i think i score more points in the anxiety chart, so that's where i am for now, but doesn't mean i'm not experiencing some of the same things, if that makes sense (and it also doesn't mean that some coping mechanisms designed for one condition won't work just because i don't think i fit under that label -- sometimes they do)

#in this current situation i think i'm experiencing a heady dose of needing (and failing) to mask neurodivergence #AND pretend to be cis AND the overwhelming drive to Be Helpful and Be A Good Neighbour which feels existentially important #especially amidst the horrors of the world since i can help with so few large-scale things so the small ones start feeling like proxies #plus the christian upbringing. can't forget that. it's definitely a factor. good samaritan sleeper agent activated at cost to myself #while also being too chronically ill AND too anxious to be capable of handling any of those things on their own let alone all of them #and while logic brain tells me i can just say no. other logic brain tells me that doing so would be leaving a vulnerable person isolated #and compassion brain won't let me do that. but compassion brain needs to apply to me as well and mostly... doesn't #and that's the part i need therapy about lol #sometimes it's not so much religious/moral OCD as having grown up actually extremely religious #they look very similar but the underlying mechanisms and brain patterns are subtly different. #brainweasel hotel