#myra hart

[sirianasims]

I listened to Myra’s slow breathing. Her mom had taken us out to dinner at a fancy vegan restaurant to celebrate Myra’s birthday and then we’d watched a movie. It was tradition. It had been a nice day until we were in bed and Myra started another tirade against the popular kids in school.

I didn’t know what to say. She still didn’t know about the party last weekend, and I didn’t want to argue with her but I couldn’t quite bring myself to agree with her anymore. She ended up giving me the silent treatment until she fell asleep.

I quietly got up and went to the bathroom. It was dark, but Myra and I had been best friends since kindergarten when her parents moved to Copperdale so her dad could work with my dad. I knew their house like it was my own.

I washed my hands and looked at myself in the mirror. Was it really so bad to want more friends? To be a part of a group? Maybe I really was just a superficial person who wanted everyone to like me. I definitely wanted Oscar to like me. We hadn’t kissed since the party but we were messaging on Social Bunny every day, and yesterday we’d locked eyes across the hallway and I had to look away before Myra noticed.

The lights were still on downstairs. Myra’s mom never went to bed before her dad came home from the hospital. My own mom did the same.

I quietly walked down the stairs and Daria looked up from her laptop.

“Can’t sleep? Is Myra snoring again?”

“No, I’m just thinking a lot.”

“Want to talk about it?”

I told her about the Spooky Day party. Somehow it had always been much easier to talk to Myra’s parents than to my own.

I did leave out the part about Oscar though.

“So since then I’ve been posting a few pictures of other costumes I’ve made. And now some people are asking for tips and I thought it would be fun to maybe make a channel and stream the process or something. Or make tutorials and post them online.”

“That sounds like a great idea! I’ve always been impressed with the stuff you come up with.”

“But what if Myra sees it as me just trying to be popular?”

“And what exactly is wrong with being popular? She should be supporting you in whatever makes you happy. Myra has a lot of strong opinions, Griffin stubbornly insists she gets it from me. But don’t let her hold you back.”

“Myra says having people like you online is dumb because they’re not real friends anyway.”

“Sometimes I think my darling daughter forgets what I do.”

Daria gestured towards her computer.

“My podcast has a couple hundred thousand listeners. Are they all my friends? No. But some of them have actually become friends, because sharing what you love with a community that likes the same thing is a great way to meet people. You can even teach others and inspire them to share their own passions. I think you would do great, and I know you’re talented. But don’t take it from me, take if from those girls at school, because I’m probably too old and hopelessly uncool to listen to.”

I couldn’t help but smile. Daria was the coolest person I knew, second only to my grandpa Conrad. They didn’t care what people thought about them, but unlike Myra, they also didn’t spend hours talking about how little they supposedly cared.

Daria was telling me all about her podcasting gear when Myra’s father, Griffin, came home.

“Evening, my love. Oh, hey Julia, you’re up late.”

“Hey Griffin. You’re right, I should probably go to bed.”

“Alright, let us know if Myra’s snoring gets too bad, we still have spare earplugs.”

He winked at me.

“And remember, we love to see what you do, Julia. So you’re guaranteed at least two followers who are also real friends.”

She stood, but then leaned down and kissed my forehead, just like she used to do when Myra and I were little.

“Goodnight, kiddo. Don’t let anyone tell you how to live your life, OK? Not even my dear daughter. Always be yourself. And if you want more tips on getting a proper recording setup, just ask me.”

beginning / previous / next

#duchellilegacy #duchellichapters #duchelligen5 #julia duchelli #myra hart #daria moon #griffin hart

[thebranchesofshe]

For those like me who can't metric

Myra: 5'8"

Warren: 5'8"

Julius: 6'4" (but he has bad posture)

Josephat: 5'5"

Lyle: 5'5"

Bonnie: 5'9"

Liz: 5'2"

Abe: 6'2"

#visages #josephat dubois #bonnie bellows #myra mooney #warren hart #liz horne #lyle everett love #all of them are taller than me (: #julius flood

[magnificentmyra]

Myra was frowning over her martini glass as her eyes scanned the room. Everyone was here-- even Mr Borovosky, which she wasn't sure how to gauge. Yet, there was no sign of Ms Lorelai Hart. If Myra had known this was optional, she wouldn't have bothered. She scanned the room again, sure she'd caught glimpse of Mirage (and hoping to catch another) but alas. "These better be some fireworks."

@happieststarters

#myra #happiestevent12 #happieststarters #bitter bb having a bitter bb day <3

[thefearedsouls]

Hey! I’m Ash. This is a multi-muse for fairytale & fantasy based muses. It consists of a lot of OCs and some canon characters. I love to plot and explore all kinds of dynamics. I’ve cross over friendly and love interacting with ALL fandoms. Minors and personal blog please do NOT interact. I ask that you please be respectful to me and my fellow roleplay partners. We’re here to create and have fun! Welcome and happy roleplaying!

CARRD MEMES OPENS

Rules & Muse list under cut

MEET THE MUN

Hey there, I’m Ashlynn, please call me Ash. I’m 29 years old. I work as a CNA at a center for developmentally disable.

I love writing, it’s been something that I love to do since I was young. My muses & blogs mean so much to me as well as all of my rp partners.

I do have a discord so ask for it if you’d like it.

Blogroll ft, active, semi-active & currently inactive blogs : @thefearedsouls @theirhorrorstories , @newbrckenscene, @killersnatch, @thatdumblamb, @femininexrage, @ghostcdman, @forgottcnboy, @thedestinedheroes, @traumaoverlooked, @deathhustled, @intothemacabre, @orderhasfallen, @doesntlikesand, @managedxmischief, @scarrredboy, @mmm-corn-syrup, @needsfans, @finalcare, @leaveuswild, @puckcdup, @givezeropucks, @wolfkiiller,

RULES

No God-moding (pretty much a given)

I DO NOT accept any hate towards me or my fellow rpers

I’m always open for plotting and planing out threads so just drop me an ask if you want to rp

This blog will most likely have NSFW pics, gifsets and threads. they will be tagged

if i post something that triggers you please, feel free to ask me tag

i have trouble replying to messages and what not, because I’m easily distracted. I’m not ignoring you I promise

i am multi verse & multi ship please respect that

following ; I follow who I can see myself and muses interacting with. I’m not 100 mutuals only but I can be selective with who I follow. If you follow me and then unfollow and follow again you’ll earn a soft block and if you continue to do it I will hard block. That gives me anxiety please respect my choice not to follow back thank you

i can at times be selective but it doesn’t mean i’m ignoring our threads I just write what I have the most muse for

Please note that this blog will have dark themes, such as violence and horror at times. I try to tag anything I feel is triggering. Again please feel free to ask me to tag anything you feel needs to be tagged

Exclusive muses ; for these muses it doesn’t mean you cannot interact with them. It’s more so muses I don’t use too often. I would love to have more people interact with them though. Just shoot me a message and if you’d like to interact with them

MUSES

Eldarion Undómiel - elf / human, son of Arwen & Aragorn ( LOTR OC )

Gwyn Undómiel - elf / human, daughter of Arwen & Aragorn ( LOTR OC)

Legolas Greenleaf - ( LOTR canon )

River Sage - wood nymph ( fandomless oc )

Iris Rosemary - garden fairy ( pixie hollow oc )

Fleur Rosmary - daughter of iris, garden / dark fairy ( pixie hollow oc )

Lyaria Greenleaf - elf queen, mother of Legolas ( LOTR OC )

Myra Thorne - witch ( fandomless oc )

Samuel Larkin - knight ( fandomless oc )

Sebastian Larkin -knight in training, son of Samual Larkin ( fandomless oc )

Peter Pan - fairy, Leader of the Lost boys ( Neverland canon )

Rufio - lost boy ( Hook Canon )

Tinkerbell - fairy ( pixie hollow canon)

Beau Hook - pirate, son of Captain Hook ( neverland oc )

Kendra Kingsley - pirate ( fandomless oc )

Novalee Porter - witch ( tarzan / little red riding hood oc )

Janey Porter - werewolf ( tarzan / little red riding hood oc )

Lalla Hart - queen ( fandomless oc )

Eve Abrams - wife of the big bad wolf, werewolf ( Little Red Riding Hood OC )

Nadia Abrams - daughter of the big bad wolf, werewolf ( Little Red Riding Hood OC )

Roxanna Redd - daughter of little red riding hood, werewolf ( Little Red Riding Hood OC )

Padmé Amidala - Queen of Naboo ( fantasy / fairytale based )

Carden Greenbriar - fae prince ( the cruel prince canon )

Dorian Cross - human / demon prince ( fantasy OC )

Celeste Delvaux - Queen / Witch ( fantasy OC )

Hana Delvaux - Princess / Witch ( fantasy / sleeping beauty OC )

Damian Lark - fae Prince ( fantasy OC )

#{ pinned post }

[darklypse]

the supplies comes in waves. summer has been kind to them. must be the sun talking— the heat its rays provide being just enough to warm her insides where she's still frostbitten from winter— but she's counting the numbers, counting the days and by the end of fall.. they might just be back to square one. when winter comes they'll have the clothes on their back and the bordered up windows of their homes but what the hell is that going to do for rumbling bellies? ❝   a whole lot of nothing.   ❞ she mumbles into the campfire as it sparks away in front of her.

colette crumples the dried to bone paper in her hands. maybe she'll finally have to cave. they have more medicine than they've needed over the last three years let alone to survive another winter. she can bargain with the other half of flagstaff. beg and plead until she's red in the face. her heart beats heavy in her ears. flushes her face against the flames and the scorch of summer. is it okay to show weakness if it keeps the people who depend on her alive? she's all too willing to take the risk. she has to be, for them. it isn't their burden to bare. it's her burden.

❝   don't worry, the fire's still got a keeper.   ❞ can feel the presence of another behind her. even when she thinks the town's fast asleep in their beds after a summer night of camaraderie, unaware of the misery in seasons to come, she is reminded she's never truly alone. makes her remember why she's hung on this long. she turns her neck to crane a look at who joins her. ❝   shouldn't be surprised it's you.   ❞ a smile tugs northbound. ❝   myra and benji enjoy themselves tonight?   ❞

¹ @svnbleach / ² starter call .. from colette for lydia hart.

#svnbleach #svnbleach: lydia hart. #colette‚ you did not break me. i'm still fighting for peace. #soft.. so soft..

[basgiathfm]

omg i’m so excited!!! mwf?

i'm glad to hear it !! we'd love to see adeline rudolph, adria arjona, alisha boe, alva bratt, amita suman, ashley moore, ayca aysin turan, bae suzy, banita sandhu, charlize theron, chloe bridges, danai gurira, davika hoorne, deepika padukone, diana penty, dichen lachman, ella balinska, erin kellyman, greta onieogou, hunter schafer, im jin ah, india amarteifio, isabela merced, jessica alexander, jodie turner-smith, kaylee bryant, kiana lede, kiana madeira, levy tran, lisette olivera, logan browning, lulu antariska, maya hawke, milly alcock, moon ga young, myra malloy, natasha liu bordizzo, nathalie emmanuel, priscilla quintana, samantha logan, sarah shahi, sobhita dhulipala, tati gabrielle, aiysha hart, ana de armas, anna shaffer, aslihan malbora, ebonee noel, ella rae smith, freida pinto, guan xiao tong, hazal filiz kucukkose, imogen waterhouse, zoe robins, vanessa morgan, xuan lu !

#appless rp #mature rp #fantasy rp #period rp #new rp #wanted #most wanted

[starlitfunkster]

I made a Tier List that kept nearly crashing my browser.

Yes, you too can rank these characters. Read More basically tells you who's who. https://tiermaker.com/create/lrgs-ocs-15769502?presentationMode=true

Best OC's Made - Blue Belle, Copy, Dusk, Ghost Pepper, Gigi, Lost.FLA, Maize, Mr. Wobbles, Naxan, Sonic.WAV, Sora, Sylvia

Awesome OC's - Adne, Angi, Aria Apple, Baritone, Barren-Cuda, Bat Aries Not Included, Cherisy, Calmati, Chai Honey Cookie, Chai Teacup, Cherry Soda, Chili Oil, Cilantro, Cotton Candy, ???, Dark Mochi, Dhalia, Doughnut, Eclipse, Fuchsia Robot, Gelatin, Glasseon, Golden, Hypno, Ja-Ringer, Jessica, Juno, Konpeito, Laffy Laffington, Lava Cake, Lillie, Locke, Luna, Maxwell Ink, Melon Dragon, Milk Choco, Milo, Moonshine Cookie, Myra, Nori Umi, Orange Juice, Patches, PegaSoar, Pluggy, Powder Sugar, Princess Flora, Pudding, Quartz, Robot Boy X, Ruby, Seabon, Seave, Sir Adne, Soda Toppin Monster, Strum, Sugar, Sylvia.EXE, Syrus, Tapi-Bot, Tapi, The Dragon, The Frond, Tula, Twisty Teacup, Veradae, Yureibon

Okay OC's - Acrylia, Agent Angel, Amelia, Amelio/Art Man, Archer, Ari???? Cookie, Aria the Imp, Armstrong Dasher, Citrus Bum, Cleric, Celeste, Chick, Choco Chip, Crystal, Diamond/Cranberry, Dynasparky, Erasi, Fairessa, Flying Fennec Fox, Gumdrop, Hydro Bomber, Ice, Ink!Amy (Gluttonous Ink), Ink!Amy, Jelly Imp, Juniper, King Cobra, Lantern Woman, Lectrona, Mandy and Xero, Marshmallow, Masker Ray, Max Wickerson, Mechan, Melani, Mockerae, Mystic, Parka, Piko, Pop, Prince Foof III, Princess.EXE, Prose Bomber, Reina, Ruby Pomella, Salmon, Sammy, Sandstorm, Sine, Soy Sauce, Sparky, Starla.EXE, Starla, Stitches, Ronin, Sugarsnap, Talkie-Walkie, Tangerine, Tapioca Pearl, The Static, Topia, Valiance Man

Minor Redesigns - Ann (Eddsworld), Aria (Toontown), Berry, BonBon, Brione, Cado Saus, Catrina Cat, Cherrybon, Citrus C. Acetate (already did), Curry, Ebi Ura, Gladseed, Ika Ura, Mud Pie (already did), Muggy, Nightshade, Sister Bomber, Susumu.MP3, Teriyaki

Major Redesigns - Blueberry Tart, Parakeet, Sweet Hart

#faces of me ~ sonas #dear god ~ too many oc's #ranking.. stuff ~ tier list

[saturdaynightmatinee]

CALIFICACIÓN PERSONAL: 6.5 / 10

Título Original: See You Yesterday

Año: 2019

Duración: 86 min

País: Estados Unidos

Dirección: Stefon Bristol

Guion: Fredrica Bailey, Stefon Bristol

Música: Michael Abels

Fotografía: Felipe Vara de Rey

Reparto: Eden Duncan-Smith, Dante Crichlow, Astro, Marsha Stephanie Blake, Michael J. Fox, Myra Lucretia Taylor, Wavyy Jonez, Patrice Bell, Khail Bryant, Waliek Crandall, Damaris Lewis, Frank Harts, Manny Ureña, Carlos Arce Jr., Johnathan Nieves, Taliyah Whitaker, Brett G. Smith, Ian Unterman, Rayshawn Richardson, Hampton Clanton, Allen Holloway

Productora: 40 Acres & A Mule Filmworks. Productor: Spike Lee. Distribuidora: Netflix  

Género: Action; Adventure; Sci-Fi

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8743064/

TRAILER:

[dagboekliesa4d]

15/04/2020

- Ik durf van mezelf te houden/mezelf graag te zien 
Ik durf voor mezelf te kiezen
 Ik durf mezelf te accepteren (of toch grotendeels) 
Ik durf mezelf te zijn 
Ik durf mezelf te uiten en kwetsbaar op te stellen 
Ik durf mijn diepste emoties te delen/gevoelens te delen 
Ik durf op te komen voor mezelf indien nodig 
Ik durf mijn (en anderen hun) grenzen af te tasten 
Ik durf liefde te geven aan anderen zonder het terug te verwachten/mijn hart op tafel te leggen 
Ik durf werk te zoeken en dit vol te houden
 Ik durf mij open te stellen naar vreemden 
Ik durf smalltalk te voeren 
Ik durf vragen te stellen/om hulp te vragen 
Ik durf mijn grenzen aan te geven 
Ik durf te zeggen waar ik nood aan heb 
Ik durf “nee” zeggen 
Ik durf telefoongesprekken aan te gaan 
Ik durf ondanks schaamte weer contact te zoeken met oude vrienden 
Ik durf dankbaar te zijn voor anderen en dit te uiten 

> vorig jaar had ik nog echt schrik om af afgewezen te worden door mij voor het minste kwetsbaar en gevoelig op te stellen (vooral door de ruzie met Myra) 
Nu heb ik meer mensen rondom mij die mijn gevoeligheid waarderen, inclusief mezelf, waardoor ik me meer geliefd ga voelen en het gevoel krijg dat ik geaccepteerd word, waardoor ik ook een beter gevoel krijg over mezelf of ik me zelfzekerder voel omdat ik “erbij hoor” en niet verstoten word door “de groep”.
,Het geeft meer een “veilig gevoel”, en het is een wisselwerking van dit te durven en ervoor geaccepteerd (en gemotiveerd door Valerie) te worden. 
- Ik voel alleen dat ik nog altijd iets kan zeggen of doen wat iemand triggert en die niets meer met mij te maken wil hebben, waardoor ik me dan immens schaam en schuldig voel, terwijl ik wel de juiste intenties had. Ik geloof dat dit volledig met Myra te maken heeft, zij deed mij voelen als een slecht persoon door gevoelig te zijn voor mijn gedrag, waardoor ik zo lang zo weinig zelfwaarde had.. Ik was slecht omdat ik gevoelig was, terwijl zij net de gevoelige was die alles extreem persoonlijk nam. En ik nam haar reactie op mij ook persoonlijk.. Ik heb me zo lang zo inferieur gevoeld tegenover haar. Ik zag haar als de wijze persoon, terwijl ze er nog erger aan toe was dan mij. Het doet zoveel pijn dat de persoon waar ge zo lang zo hard naar opkijkt, nadien jarenlang op u neerkijkt en u onder de duim wilt houden en u beschimpt.. Het ging van ideale zus tot mijn 20e (?) Heel snel naar tyrannieke zus die handelde uit verlies van controle over mij tot mijn 25e en toen de bom barstte.
 En van Valerie krijg ik nu wel de steun en liefde die ik van een zus van die leeftijd zou moeten krijgen. 
Ik denk dat ik nog veel verdriet in mij heb dat ik een zus heb verloren die haar rug naar mij heeft toegekeerd, een zus die ik ooit zo graag had, en dat ik daar nooit echt om gerouwd heb. Ik vind het ook erg dat dat nooit meer zal terugkeren..


[sirianasims]

Chapter 39

Invisible String

Myra sighed.

“… but you know what my mom is like. There’s no mercy. So I had to apologise to my dumb teacher. Ugh, parents.”

I tried to mimic her tone.

“Yeah. Parents. Can’t live with them, can’t leave them yet. At least not for two more years. But then you’ll be off to Britechester.”

Myra laughed hoarsely. I liked the sound.

“Yes! Freedom! And I’ll scout out all the best hangout spots for when you join me.”

I turned my head, distracted. A couple of girls from my year, Sophia and Emma, were standing behind the hedge and whispering.

Myra saw them too.

“Stupid bimbos. Think they’re better than us just because they’re popular.”

“Look at them, Julia, not an intelligent thought in their head, spending their days gossiping and posting inane shit on Social Bunny about pillow fights. As if we don’t know what it really means. They seem to think the amount of likes they get somehow decide their worth as people. Why would anyone ever care about being popular?”

Her voice was dripping with venom, her thin lips curled in a sneer. I briefly wondered what it would be like to kiss her but pushed the thought away as so many times before. Myra wasn’t someone you kissed. Myra was something to be admired from a safe distance, all sharp edges and opinions.

“Maybe they just like having a lot of friends.”

“Friends? Julia, people liking you on social media are not real friends anyway. There’s a reason they call it followers. Like you were some sort of guru or something. It’s ridiculous.”

“I guess.”

Myra narrowed her eyes.

“Please don’t tell me you want to be popular.”

I hesitated. Myra was my best friend – my only friend, really. I should be honest with her.

“I don’t want to be popular, but sometimes… it would be nice to be… liked?”

I forced the words out, slowly withering under her glare.

“Seriously, Julia? You, the most unique and creative person I know, one of the only girls in this dumb town that doesn’t suck – you want to be just another clone?”

“No! I just feel alone sometimes, you know? Like, I’m already the fifth wheel in my family. My parents have each other, my sisters have always been really close and my brothers are twins. Sometimes I just think it would be nice to have friends.”

“And what am I, chopped liver?”

“You know what I mean, Myra. You don’t always have time for me and I’ll still have a whole year left after you graduate. All alone.”

The bell rang. Myra got up and brushed off her jeans, smiling at me. As quick as she was to anger, it never lasted long.

“Are you sure you can’t hang out after class? My dad is making Bhel Puri.”

“Sorry, not tonight. I’ve got to finish a project.”

It wasn’t really a lie.

beginning / previous / next

#duchellilegacy #duchellichapters #duchelligen5 #julia duchelli #myra hart

[thebranchesofshe]

Bonnie Bellows

"Phatch, forgive me. I don't know how to keep feeding you. I heard once that you were really a girl not much older than me. How do you handle it all? Do you have any mercy for a girl who would break the chain of your descendants?"

Three words: overwhelmed, terrified, resilient.

Name: Bonnie Jean Bellows

Date of birth: May 13th, 1952

Age as of Chapter I: 18

Height: 5'9"

Gender: girl.

Orientation: she doesn't know it, but she's a lesbian.

Occupation: the final Keeper of the Tree. She's also a waitress at Vick's.

Religion: the last true acolyte of Phatch.

Politics: what?

Favorite book: We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson. She simultaneously relates to it and finds it foreign.

Favorite treat: vanilla ice cream. There's no electricity in her house.

Background: Bonnie lives alone with her mother, her grandmother, and something she calls Daddy Long Legs who might be her father or grandfather but she isn't sure. She is solely responsible for feeding the Tree which houses the goddess she was born to worship. She is the only one who can. If the Tree starves, the world will end. Her grandmother is ailing, and her mother has moved to the basement. Daddy Long Legs can't do much of anything. The fate of the world rests on Bonnie's shoulders. At least, that's what she's been told. She has no doubt about the magic of the Tree, of Phatch, of herself, but she doubts the purpose that was assigned to her. She wants to live, but that's a hard thing to do when you need to reliably transform men into worms for the sake of salvation.

What was that about the worms?: don't worry about it.

She has magic?: yes. Somehow, despite everything, things end up going her way. The toys she made as a child came to life. Her house shifts and changes sometimes. She wonders how much of it is her and how much of it is Phatch, or even Daddy Long Legs.

Why is her mother in the basement?: to be fair, her mother frequently gets out of the basement. Unrelated, but have you ever heard of the wolf woman of Decaelo?

What is the unbroken chain?: the necessity for every Bellows woman to have a single daughter. It's always a daughter, no matter what. There must always be three Bellows witches. Grandmother, Mother, and Daughter. Grandmother is ailing, but...

Bonnie wants to break the chain?: she doesn't want to break it. She just wants to opt out of it.

Who are her friends?: for now, just Daddy Long Legs, really.

Who will be her friends?: Abe Kisro, Myra Mooney, Warren Hart, Bernice Raney, eventually, one day, Julius Flood.

Who are her enemies?: she keeps a low profile, but did get relentlessly picked on in high school.

What does she look like?: she's tall and lean, with brownn skin and straight dark hair. Her appearance changes a lot over the course of the story, but she has big brown hooded eyes and a long nose, prominent teeth. She is sort of lean and angular in a boyish way but she likes it. She isn't sure who she gets her looks from, as she has little memory of what her mother looked like back when she was still allowed to go around on two legs, and she never met her father.

I don't really have a particular real-life person in mind for her, to be honest.

#characters #visages #bonnie bellows

[dagboekliesa3d]

15/03/2019

- Ik voel me vandaag redelijk productief, ik heb al veel gedaan gekregen. Vanochtend stond ik wel nog op met veel vragen omtrent hoe te navigeren in het opbouwen van een connectie met E.: “Mag ik vragen hoe het met ‘r gaat, of moet ik afwachten?”, “Kan ik die tip geven over Topdokters?”, “Moet ik nu al een afspraak vastleggen?”, “Zou ik haar volgen op Instagram?”, “Zou ik haar vragen wat ze het liefst drinkt voor ze komt?”, “Heb ik me vorige keer te kwetsbaar opgesteld en overshared door mijn dromen te delen?”, “Toon ik desinteresse als ik geen contact opneem?”, etc. Het blijft me ook bezighouden tijdens fysieke taken omdat ik niets anders heb om veel over na te denken of te analyseren. 
Ik heb echt nood aan een handleiding met regels hoe ik hier mee moet omgaan. Het is alsof ik volledig opnieuw over relaties moet leren zonder ook maar iets van kennis. 
- Ik vind het wel vreemd dat mama echt zo weinig contact opneemt. Ik heb gisteren Myra unblocked (ga ze wel niet toevoegen als vriend) en net na 2 weken uitstellen mama een WhatsApp gestuurd.. Ook hoe het gaat met haar. Mama reageerde met “gaat wel” en ik moet mezelf nu echt inhouden niet de verantwoordelijkheid te voelen om dat op te lossen (Ze hielp mij ook niet als het minder met mij ging) Het komt nog steeds over alsof ze heel emotioneel afhankelijk is van mij, terwijl ik op een gezonde manier probeer te communiceren. Het voelt ergens wat verstikkend om dan aan die verwachtingen te moeten voldoen en terug meegesleurd te worden in die wederzijdse afhankelijkheid tussen 2 angstig gehechte mensen.. Het voelt zo beladen, alsof ik terug gevangen ben in de relatie. 
Ik voel wel dat ik er emotioneel afstand van kan doen en geen druk voel om te pleasen. Het heeft geen invloed op mijn gemoed.
 Het lijkt me ook ongezond om te worden meegezogen en weer in de onderdanige positie terecht te komen. Ze moet andere middelen zoeken om haar noden te vervullen dan afhankelijk te zijn van mij. Ik weet ook niet of het mijn taak is haar dat duidelijk te maken.
 Nu ik zelf uit die rol ben en emotioneel gezonder ben geworden, zie ik wel in hoe diep mijn omgeving zat en ik daar mee naar gevormd was en zelfs het ergste aan toe was.
 Ik ga ze niet meer helpen, ze moeten zelf de skills leren om voor zichzelf te zorgen 
> ik wil er niet emotioneel voor iemand zijn als die er emotioneel niet voor mij is
 - Ik heb niet veel gezonde connecties maar ik kan er wel alles aan doen om zelf emotioneel volwassen te worden en mijn noden en grenzen aan te geven, en bovenal uit te komen voor wat ik wil en wat ik leuk vind ipv geen persoonlijkheid te hebben zodat ik meer kans heb dat iemand me leuk vindt (maar zo wek ik ook geen interesse) 
- Als mensen iets van me willen, moeten ze voortaan open communiceren ipv laten gissen. Ik merk alsmaar meer mensen die daar van uit gaan terwijl rechtuit om hulp vragen veel effectiever is? (En het is een kwestie van om die noden te vragen bij de juiste personen, waar er al een emotionele connectie is)
 - Ik mag ook niet uit het oog verliezen dat ik van nature zorgend en empathisch ben, maar in het geval van mama daar tegenin moet gaan: ik krijg er toch niets voor terug, tenzij me minder ongemakkelijk voelen.. Maar ik moet helemaal geen mensen “redden”. Mama heeft mij alleen maar nodig om haar noden te vervullen, maar mijn noden kan ze nooit vervullen > onevenwichtige relatie
 - Vind ik dan E. tof omdat zij wel emotioneel responsief is? Omdat ze niet emotioneel afhankelijk van mij is? Omdat ze mij niet wil controleren of manipuleren? Omdat ze mijn keuzes respecteert en accepteert? Omdat ze empathisch is en een goed hart heeft? Omdat ik voel dat we op hetzelfde niveau zitten? Omdat ze voelt als iemand die altijd met mij begaan zal zijn?


[20yearsofmovies]

Time 16-Feb-2020 10:40 Day Sunday Where Cineworld - Northampton Screen 7 Seat H12 Price £4.60

#emma #anya taylor-joy #johnny flynn #bill nighy #mia goth #myra mcfadyen #josh o'connor #callum turner #rupert graves #gemma whelan #amber anderson #miranda hart #tanya reynolds #suzy bloom #Vanessa M. Owen #isis hainsworth

[whatsnextmovies]

See You Yesterday

May 17, 2019

#See You Yesterday #movies #movie trailers #action #adventure #crime #time travel #Netflix #Stefon Bristol #Eden Duncan-Smith #Dante Crichlow #Astro #Marsha Stephanie Blake #Myra Lucretia Taylor #Wavyy Jonez #Carlos Arce Jr. #Patrice Bell #Khail Bryant #Waliek Crandall #Frank Harts #.

[static-teevee]

so... glowing fish, huh?

(aka i colored a drivers ed doodle while running on 3.5 hours of sleep and It Shows)

#dooby doodles #love me some miles tbh im not sure why #his hair usually isnt all emo but sometimes i like to be dramatic #this is a character from mischief which is a series my bestest bud kobey and i put together #its probabky the biggest universe ive been involved in creating and i love every character thats a part of it #i know theres a picutre of hart myra and banks on here though im not sure about anyone else #love these kids

[azspot]

Even if the received Christian view of hell were that of an exclusive preserve for only the very worst of souls — Adolf Hitler, Ian Brady and Myra Hindley, Pol Pot — the sheer brutal banality of the idea of everlasting torment would still be morally unintelligible. As it happens, of course, the received view throughout most of Christian history has actually been that hell is the final destination not merely of the monsters among us, but of all sorts of lesser miscreants: the profligate, the wanton, the unbaptised, the unbelieving, the unelect ... the unlucky. But this hardly matters. No matter how exclusive we imagine the criteria for membership in the society of the damned to be, nothing can make the idea morally coherent. Choose just one soul, the most depraved you can conceive, and imagine him or her alone subjected to truly eternal suffering, and then try also to make yourself believe that this wretch’s unabating misery, age upon age, is an acceptable price to pay for the existence of the world, for the great drama of creation and redemption, and for the ultimate felicity and glory of God’s Kingdom. If your conscience is a healthy one, you will find it impossible to do so. Or so I would have thought.

The obscenity of belief in an eternal hell

#hell