#my friend isnt very delicate in her way to say it but she's right. i'm not cut out for being normal like that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

irish-urn · 2 years

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I had thoughts on your thoughts and now I'm leaving an embarrassingly long ask

I know I shouldn't like this episode as much as I do (bc Casey is being treated as if she's in the wrong here) but it's soooooo good for understanding the house dynamics and relationships and characterization that UGH I just love it.

This episode is a prime example of how George and Nora aren't great parents. (Good people, I'm not hating on them for that) but they can do better. You're right, WHY DOESN'T Nora scold Derek with the laundry or for the pool? WHY does Nora tell Casey she's out of line for expecting Nora to, oh I don't know, PARENT? (That one in particular got to me. (I'm the anon from the blended family) and I've had this exact conversation with my mom. Myself and my older brothers definitely raised our younger siblings. And I've been in that situation where I was in the middle of disciplining my little sister when my mom got all offended because I wasn't my little sisters mom and I shouldn't have been disciplining her (make that make sense) then proceeded to get mad at me when I told her she needed to step it up as a mom (again, not trying to trauma dump, just trying to say how realistic LWD is 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂) all the while my step dad was just??? Not around??? Or if he was around, he didn't discipline either)

And I get it. They're human, and they're busy, and shit happens. But Jesus. Forgetting your children at school? Really? There is being human then there's negligence.

Don't even get me started on the muddling along comment 🙄

And yes, isn't Casey SUCH a control freak for suggesting a very basic laundry separating system 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Maybe its just my shipper brain, but I honestly don't think Derek was trying to antagonize her when he was essentially telling her to calm down. (Besides that "you are your delicates go take a cold water rinse" 😂) but he patted her on the shoulder and told her everything was fine. Because to him, compared to what we find out later in the episode about how they lived pre McDonald invasion, everything IS fine. The house is clean, sure the clothes are pink but it's not that deep compared to the trash piles that used to cover the dining room table and the kitchen island.

I just think with the "everything's fine" he just doesn't know how to talk to Casey yet and he doesn't really understand the full extent of her anxiety. And he said "boo hoo" only after she shoved him off of her. Maybe I'm reading into it too much 😂

When you said "she" doesn't have any other friends, do you mean Emily or Casey? Either way, it kind of answers your question. I think they're friends with each other out of convince more than anything. I don't think there is a lot tying them together and I think through the first season at the very least, Emily is using Casey 😬

Yes, I also think Casey is a big girly girl and I love that and I think Derek hates that 😂 there's this episode in season 3 (Ugh season 3, my beloved) when he goes off about how there is girly stuff all around... which would be a valid thing to complain about... if he was 10, not a 16 year old boy. I think Derek hates being around and reminded of Casey's femininity because he actually really likes what a princess she can be (see, NWF and the nail polish 😏) because think about it! He doesn't have an issue with Marti being a girly girl (anyone who says she isnt at least a little bit, please go watch the next episode Marti the Monster. Derek literally lets Marti put make up on him) maybe I'm reading into it too much again 😅 I just think she's cute and girly but not in a little sister way, and Derek hates that

Paul is one of the few voices of reason in this show and I LOVE him. And that "Oh my watch must be late" just for Casey to burst in literally one second later and start profusely apologizing foe being late– its one of my favorite scenes lmao.

George's parenting style is so... no.. yep. That's it. It's just like last episode. He thinks of his children more as friends than anything. Like when he's on the phone with the Davises, and he looks at Derek and scowls and goes, "don't worry, I will TALK. To. Him." And Derek literally just goes 👌🏼 Derek doesn't take his threat seriously. And why should he? George is more of a friend than a father.

Also, isn't it interesting that Derek makes dinner and gets praised for helping out whereas Casey does something for the family at least once and episode and it barely gets recognized 😒

Also, Derek earlier in the episode to Casey’s "I'm a team player!" "No, you're a big freak." God, he's such an asshole but I love him so much 😂

Derek DOES think of Casey when he's thinking about how to fix things. I mean, at the end of the day, I think it was out of laziness more than anything. A "I don't want to deal with this dumpster fire so someone else can" BUT it's interesting that he's starting to *KNOW* her. He knows she can do it.

*claps hands at your thoughts responding to my thoughts*

So, like, what I see with George and Nora (and you're right, this episode was SUCH an insight into them and their relationship and their parenting 'skills', and I really enjoyed it), is that Nora is adapting to George — she moved her family into his place, she's "muddling along" because he's asked her to, she's not disciplining the Venturi children because they're not hers — and I think to myself, this is where Casey learned this behaviour. She adapts to her boyfriends like her mom does.

And while I get that it's important to compromise in a relationship and consider the other person, there comes a point where it's gone too far? And, like... They've gone too far here.

And while the McDonald and the Venturi houses were very different with the single parents, they've gone super far towards the Venturi way — like, I would argue they've done 80% Venturi, 20% McDonald, and that's only because Casey has screamed for equality. So...

I also don't think Derek was trying to antagonize Casey very much in this episode, mostly because of your points about his improved living environment, but also because... Casey was already upset and frazzled without him doing anything extra. No need to actively antagonize someone who's already antagonized! And he only starts fighting Casey over the vacuum when she takes over (I bet'cha that was a pride thing; Jeeze, Casey, I can figure out how to work a damn vacuum!)

Annnnd we're on the same page with Casey the princess/girly-girl; and this pleases me. It also tortures Derek, and that pleases me too (mwahaha).

I AM SO TORN ABOUT GEORGE because he's NICE and SWEET and HOPELESS and FORGETFUL and OVERWHELMED and kinda a bit of a dumbass? Like, this would work IF Nora had approached him and said, "Hey, we need to get our act together because we have five kids now. I've noticed you're a little overwhelmed and kind of let your children run wild, and because I love you, I want to help you. Can we talk about ways to make this new family work?" But instead, she just goes along with George's way, and I... I dunno. Seeing George's parenting style this episode explained so much to be about Derek and Marti in particular. Edwin too, but not as much because he's adjusting to Derek's larger than life presence.

AND ISN'T IT ALWAYS THE WAY that when someone does something nice OOC, they get rewarded and praised, as opposed to the person who regularly does good things? *sighs* Ah, humans.

#asks #life with derek #honestly this re-watch is mostly just making me feel better about my portrayal of the characters #which sounds really vain/proud; but this is my tumblr and my blog so there

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