#my explanation isnt enough

[silverskye13]

Will enby Helsknight/trans Tanguish/top surgery scars/stubborn avoidant Welsknight in a gender crisis make it into the main story of RnS? Like, a full acknowledgment of it? Because yes, us on tumblr are aware (and happily bully RnS Wels for it) but I’m curious to how it may be brought up in the main storyline instead of rambles and drabbles. (Don’t get me wrong, those rambles and drabbles are what get me through the day. But my best friend, who isn’t in the MCYT fandom whatsoever, just caught up with RnS and doesn’t use tumblr, and besides spamming her with tumblr posts I wanna know how much I can revel in the glory of the skrunkles with her!)

That is a great question, actually. And the answer is I don't really know.

So this is one of the downsides to writing things chapter by chapter. If I had gone into this going "oh heck yeah they're trans", this would've come up in the plot way sooner. It's nice information 1) for all the trans folks reading and 2) because it has the potential to inform the themes in the narrative. This whole story is about two chief things I think: death [the inevitability of] and identity [what defines you and why]. Why should you care if literally no one else (including the universe) does? That would be so cool to speak about in terms of a trans allegory! Why do you care about gender when it's just one thing in a world of crazy things? Or at the very least, how does it inform your identity? But this is a change I made on a whim suddenly, and I know Exactly Where I Want This Plot To Go, so trans topics and allegories as Plot Points probably won't happen.

On the more technical side of introducing trans characters -- how do you do that without just dropping "oh btw they're trans" in? Like, how do you make it a relevant thing to talk about, that doesn't feel forced or shoehorned in, especially this late in the story? Probably me overthinking, but I read it done wrong so often. It gets tired. And if I ever work on my original stories, there are trans characters in there! If I can figure out how to Do It Well in a fanfic, then I can figure out how to do it in original fiction someday maybe. So I kinda wanna take the introduction seriously? I've actually been thinking about it so much I've thought about rewriting the intro to the next chapter ahaha [it already needs rewritten in general, there's a lot going on, but the intro was going to be Helsknight waking up from something, and he sleeps shirtless, and not addressing top surgery scars then would be kinda silly I think.]

I can say at the very least, Gender Avoidant Wels probably won't factor in the story much. He is a character, but I don't think he'll become Enough of a character to faithfully address something like a trans self discovery arc. At best his issues with gender might be mentioned in passing.

Sorry! I know you probably want a better answer! My answer is basically: I don't know I'm still working on it. I want it to be there, but the capacity it's there is undecided.

That being said, I've been sitting on this glorious ask since the shenanigans started and the temptation to just Do That grows every time I read it:

#rns asks #trans tanguish #nonbinary helsknight #anonymous #no one asked but i think to date #the best intro to a trans character ive seen #is from the book 'what moves the dead' #where the mc explained they were a soldier and when you join the army you get assigned pronouns that only soldiers get #and they explain some people join the army to fight and some join because their old pronouns dont fit #and i dont think the mc ever defined why exactly they chose to be a soldier #but hey thats their pronouns now take it or leave it #them being a soldier has impact on the plot which means #even if the story isnt a trans story [about being trans] their pronouns still have weight and importance #the long pronoun explanation has a very compelling reason and never feels odd or forced #and it gets even more interesting in the second book 'what feasts at night' #where the soldier's PTSD has a direct effect on the ending of the story #[sighs dreamily] goddamn it T Kingfisher how do you always write so good #anyway enough about my writer crush on Kingfisher

[box-dwelling]

I know that how much Phoenix suspected Kristoph is very vague and I like the idea he had very little clue but honestly the thing that makes me think he did is Trucy. Because I think there is absolutely no way Kristoph didn't want her dead. He tried to kill vera, child murder isn't above him. And Trucy was a far far bigger weak chain in his scheme than she was but she escapes him basically unscathed other than minus one parent, who lets be real was canonically a POS who tried to kill a woman over a poker game. She saw him give her the diary page. She has psychic lie defecting abilities and he is constantly lying. She's absolutely the biggest direct threat to his scheme.

I feel like if Phoenix genuinely trusted Kristoph he would have absolutely had the opportunity to kill her and tie up that loose end. Trucy's savvy and able to protect herself but she's also a child. It is a miracle she's still alive by AA4 and I think that has to be because Phoenix was protecting her because he knew he couldn't trust Kristoph around her.

#ace attorney #phoenix wright #kristoph gavin #trucy wright #aa4 #Apollo Justice ace attorney #7yg #also i do just kind of prefer the idea of that this was a battle Phoenix knew he was fighting every day and knew he would probably lose #thats a more enjoyable angst for me #and it kind of makes a bit more sense for why he cut everyone off and isolated himself #like he knew that he was in the lions den and didn't want anyone else in there with him woth the exception of trucy who was inndanger anyway #and he knew he was the only one who understood this battle enough to protect her #but alternative explanations can include a krisnix one where kristoph genuinely didn't want to hurt Phoenix's daughter #but honestly my krisnix take is that he would because that man is possessive as fuck and wouldn't want Phoenix giving his attention to her #or it could be that Phoenix is clueless and trucy isnt and shes the one actually fighting the battle and protecting him #but thats also very very sad and i don't want to do that to her #maybe theyre both protecting the other but refusing to tell each other because they dont want to put the other in danger #that would be in character as fuck for the wrights #trucy fully in a ya adventure we cant tell our parents about the unspeakable horrors because then they'll get hurt #while Phoenix is trying desperately to just keep them both alive but doesn't want to put that burden on a literal child #idk i do genuinely just think its way way sadder if Kristoph is a known threat through most of the 7yg #but they know they cants pull away from him even as he poses a direct threat to them because that makes him even more dangerous #beanix

[puhpandas]

What's a FNAF theory you have (any piece of media) that has you like this?

🔪🔪🔪🙂🔫🔫🔫

that fnaf 4 is literally just a dream for Evan and is very straightforward and not hard to understand. evan is in a coma throughout nights 1-5 and relives the week up to his birthday but scarier before he dies (flatline in black void + medicine and iv line and flowers appearing on the table next to his bed during gameplay) and goes on to possess golden Freddy, which cassidy possesses later as well

apparently it's very hard to believe that fnaf 4 is as straightforward as it is and it makes no sense and is confusing and how are the animatronics called the nightmare animatronics real. guys let's make this game as confusing as possible with outlandish theories and then complain it's too hard to understand and doesnt fit into the story (it fully does.) this is why dittophobia ruined my life

#this might not seem that bad but ive seen sooo many people complain about fnaf 4 #and ENJOY dittophobia as an explanation #and also fully erase evan in saying that Michael is the player in fnaf 4 #pandas.txt #pandas talks #pandas asks #discourse #thoughts #me when people erase evan from the story as much as possible because michael being the protag of 4 games + bonus nights in some others #isnt enough apparently #its kinda disrespectful to my fave character so thats why i dont like it #i think these people remember when fnaf 4 first came out and flipped everything on its head #and still remember it that way #without thinking about how it fully makes sense now #but theyre still complaining about it

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

.

#just saw someone suggesting that ''everything being a disorder today'' stems from wanting a scientific explanation as to why theyre #different from everyone else and that desire itself stems at least partly from neoliberalism and individualism and wanting to be special #and buying into the facades of neoliberalism #and i get what theyre trying to say #but #my guy #your explanation was in context of things like chronic pain disorders and d/Deafness and autism and allergies #which most definitely do not stem from that. like i would still be autistic and still have chronic pain if i was not in a neoliberal society #neoliberal ideals are not the cause of my functional neurological disorder #neoliberalism isnt causing my peripheral nervous system to not work properly #i understand the argument youre trying to make and it definitely applies in some cases #but do not come into disabled spaces sprouting that shite #you know why i seeked a diagnosis for my chronic pain issues? because different chronic pain disorders can be treated differently #theres no point giving ne anti inflammatory meds for my fibromyalgia #and actually i do need the meds i take for my fnd because they reduce my nerve pain enough for me to function as a person #i didnt want a name for it so i could certify that i was an individual and not like everyone else #i wanted a name for it because i was in pain and i was suffering and i wanted medical treatment for it and i wanted an explanation as to why #i was in pain all the damn time

[gibbearish]

are we really back to "oh you support (blank)? name ten people who (do/are) that right now or else youre lying for allyship points and everything you have to say should be disregarded". i thought we left that back in like. 2012 misogynist nerdbro culture

#i have seen it on two entirely separate topics lately and its like. hello????? #'if you cant name 10 trans authors off the top of your head you shouldnt be talking about trans issues full stop. #i dont think thats an unreasonable expectation for anyone wanting to engage in rational discourse' how about we all go outside #because like yeah i couldnt name you too many trans authors but given my transgenderismness i think i do in #fact still deserve a seat at the table. and i dont think there should be a prerequisite academic education level to be allowed to talk. #'but you could find them for free-' yes‚ you can‚ but people should still be allowed to a) choose what they read based #off of what interests them and not mildly-to-extremely dense nonfiction writing and still Talk About Their Own Lives And Have #Opinions #shockingly not reading a lot of one specific type of author doesnt prevent a person from having reasonable and valuable opinions #if youre not capable of parsing someones argument because theyre not well-read enough then that just imo means you dont actually understand #the things youve read to be able to give them a synopsis #this isnt school. we're not being graded. there is no required reading and you are perfectly capable of giving people an #explanation on your stances if theyre unfamiliar with them #i had a b) but i dont remember what it was‚ i think it probably was part of what i covered there that i thought was a separate thought #but yeah just like. idk you can just say 'hey i would really recommend reading xyz but to summarize‚ (thing that disproves them)' #it is not . difficult to either Explain yourself or‚ if that is not possible‚ Not be condescending to the person youre not willing to teach #for not knowing #ill stop there bc ive already done that ramble before but. yes #origibberish #edit: ok upon reread i got turned around and switched from addressing the less educated one conveying their arguments #to the more well read one #bc that was the b is i was gonna talk about both #yall get what i mean though just like. split it in half and flip it turnways

[beegswaz]

back on My bullshit

#HOW DO I. AM I A GUY. HELLO. #this isnt Even a oh no i Dont think im trans beclaws i dont Experience dysphoria thing this is a AM I A DUDE. HELLO. I DONT #FEEL ANY STRONG EMOTIONS TOWARDS IT. #EVERYTIME SOMEONE ASKS ME WHAT IM COMFORTABLE WITH IM LIKE dawg i dont care. hello. im me. is That enough of An explanation. #idk it SHOULD BE ONE #fuck it. i Know im not a woman At least yk. #fuck it ill Just use genderqueer and trans. i Am not paid enough to figure it out my Gender is whatever is funniest at the Moment. #im trans but Not in a specific way im Just not a girl #does that Make sense. yeah. i Think it does.

[faggling]

realized that as far as I know my abuse primarily started after 9/11...much to think about

#kind of joking but kind of not #like. do you think the situation created a feeling of lost control and hopelessness and fear that they just used me to alleviate?? #its probably not that deep but its an interesting thing to me #idk idk idk #theres a lot of other reasons why it all happened so im not like grasping for explanations. just a curiousness #i just wonder how much their hate got solidified by the post 9/11 culture #especially since my mom may have been pregnant at the time #...i really love my brother but i do wonder if things would have been different if he wasnt born. it almost certainly would not be #but when im that sad my brain isnt exactly rational #also there's nothing saying i wasnt being abused before then #or that maybe it only started then because i was old enough to hate #old enough to push back and try developing autonomy and independence #which i know is a trigger for my moms abuse #hrm

[cowboy-robooty]

Love your HCs <3!!! And your art!!!!!!!! Le Question: is Romano 99.99999% straight like Veneziano? What's his sexuality journey like? If you don't mind sharing your thoughts. Is it as weird as Veneziano's pre school BF then pussy for a millennium. Thank youu

FIRST) THANK YOUU MANAJW i always feel surprised when i remember it isnt just me and my 3 friends on da world wide web that like my stuff <:') ARIGATO! FROM ME! *points at me* TO YOU! *points at you*

Anyways now SECOND) i think romano knows he likes girls and actually is nice to them and tries to rizz them its just hes cringe fail so i actually think hes a total virgin whos never dated anyone ever bc hes so aids. i think he doesnt really see guys as an option not because of sexuality but more because hes too busy trying to catch a girl he aint even got TIME to think about other fish types we go one type at a time. like when he goes i would never date anyone in the g8 its not because theyre boys its because "theyre stupid and annoying and ugly and should kill themselves and one of them is my fucking brother" romano is a boy kisser its just that never gets addressed because he hates all the men around him too much. i also think he kinda likes the idea of a girl more than actually dating a girl because 1) he doesnt take into account that girls actually can fart (60% why he thinks theyre so angelic and wunderbar) and 2) he desperately wants to be popular asf like italy so hes like ITALY BANGS CHICKS EVERYDAY SO OBVIOUSLY THERES GOTTA BE SOME SECRET SAUCE IN THERE. but i think he never in his life ends up dating a girl because they all reject his ass bc he fumbles so hard and then prussia activates his yandere gene and he gets loyal asf (but still demented and terrible. basically nothing changes other than him no longer hitting on girls) so woooooo I THINK THE LABLE HE USES IS "normal" (he is anything except normal)

*read tags if u wanna see why i changed my mind. actually romano uses da lable

**drumrolllllll**

BISEXUAL! **judge gavel slams down**

SENTENCE: 10 THOUSAND HOT POCKETS!

#me thinks hes too preoccupied scheming and getting restraining orders put against him to really think about a lable #see hetalia characters all have aids like me so i think a handful of them dont really use lables #or if they do then they dont really follow them its more like they use it cuz they need something to say when someone asks them for it #i think theyre smart enough to use lables only as theyre meant to be used. as something that acts as a positive for them #either in makes them feel secure or gives them an answer to tell people when they ask #cuz like for example germany is the Only Boy italy likes and italys like well ill use bisexual cuz why not lol #but i think some other characters could have that same situation and stick with the lable straight #cuz its like saying wether or not you like chips #if you only like one specific flavor and brand and hate everything else then its arguable if you can say you '*like* chips or not #i dont think the way people feel love and attraction is something that can be fit into neat little lables because its always different #so i say lables shouldnt be treated as an end all be all when choosing one. its just whatever you like #after all. having a lable doesnt make you any better or worse than someone with another lable #sorry for the long tangent but yeah thats my explanation for why i dont think romano has a #solid lable #THIS ISNT ME SAYING I THINK PEOPLE SHOULD STAY IN THE CLOSET AND REPRESSED AND SHIT #its me saying that people should just be themselves and sometimes a lable just isnt apart of that and it shouldnt be required #also i take it all back actually romano identifies as bisexual so he can call germany the f slur #ask #SWAG

[s0urte3th]

mental eelness

#idk! #ig the point is that it’s always going to be there #and idk if youre a science or reasoning guy like i am #but sometimes you need to remember that everything has an explanation but not always a reasoning! #i know you want to help me #i know you want to put a stop to my bad thoughts #but you need to remember that my bad thoughts arent because people arent enough. or because people are bad #another way to explain it is maybe like #you cant fix something that isnt your own fault! if you see someone crash their car you cant fuckin fix that- #maybe give them camera footage to help with their insurance or something! but you cannot fix their problem for them #urgh idk im bad at explaining #anyhow #it isnt your fault that my mind quite literally is BUILT DIFFERENT

[bf-xml]

🎤 Look he’s pogging lol

🎤 I wonder what he’s missed...maybe the tags will give a hint or two.

(That means read the tags teehee thank you)

#ooc: salutations everyone! I guess I owe everyone an explanation #i apologize for my absence again. i promise im okay and i have been safe and sound #my excuse isnt exactly...valid id say but #work has been kicking my ass since i got the job #not to mention my days off are constantly filled up with tasks to catch up on Adulting and such #and when im not doing Adulting things.......ive been playing splatoon 3 tbh lmao #hopefully ill get the muse to play bf again soon. but as far as an expected time for that goes i unfortunately have nothing to offer #i hope everyone here has been doing okay in the meantime and i hope to see you soon #with that being said...what do you think of the new icon? its not much of a difference but im still kinda proud of it. even if its old now #anyway. i love you guys and i look forward to any threads in the future when i get the time and motivation to start them up again #on that note. please be aware that i am officially dropping any threads i had started or participated in before now #i apologize for this...but its hard to get back into old threads when i dont remember where i was going with them yknow? #if anyone is interested in my writing in general ive been working on a strangled red fic on ao3 #ive been falling back into my old pokepasta hyperfixation after lullaby v2 dropped and was reminded of my favorite little fucked up guy #its called faulty if anyone else here is a based steven enjoyer. and mike too ig #but enough out of me...ive been talking too much lol #until next time! catch ya later!

[life1tself]

realizing everything is going to be different forever now and youre not even home so you cant fucking lose your bananas in peace

#autism resistance to change vs everything in your life changing forever #yayyyyyy #i cant do the things i usdd to anymofe #my body has deteriorated! no explanation why #and it isnt bad enough to justify mobility aids #so instead i just have to sit here snd realize well! its all ruined forever! #vent

[extinctfowl]

shoutout to tubbo having irl xray vision ig

#my vision isnt good enough and my brain isnt big enough to understand his explanation on how hes seeing diamonds

[mashpotatoe]

im a white jew, i was born in israel,

ive lived there all my life and was brought up in an environment that fosters racism driven by nationalism, nationalism driven by racism.

in israel, they teach you jews and muslims (though usually, they just say arabs) have always been enemies, the same way the US deems the entire middle east as a inherent war zone, ridding them of the responsibility for perpetuating war in thst region.

they tell you "were the fair and humane side who strives for peace! its the arabs who never accept the offer!"

i remember the first time i began doubting that sentiment was in fourth grade, when we were having a discussion in class about the character of Saul from the Torah. the teacher was talking about how Saul, the first monarch of the Kingdom of Israel, used to fight the Philistines, and when she added that the Philistines were the natural enemy of the Israelites, she asked the class what group of people is their modern equivalent to which everyone very eagerly replied "Arabs!" and nevermind that there in that same class sat two arab boys, one of whom sat next to me, who i looked at and thought "but he isnt my enemy? hes just a boy in my class."

they teach you to hate arabs. sometimes they say it outright. sometimes they say it more carefully, or make a distinction between good and bad arabs, those who are with us and those who are against us.

in a state based on the idea of (white) jewish supremacy, they teach you jews are naturally superior. they use the conspiratorial narrative of "jews controlling the world" to their favor, giving their own watered down explanation for why antisemitism exists, saying that it must be driven by jealousy.

the zionist movement always used antisemitism to its advantage, either for reinforcing the notion of jewish supremacy or appealing to the real pain and trauma of generations, people who survived the holocaust, connecting them to stolen land where they are "guaranteed" safety ergo granting "justification" for the suffering of others.

its using peoples real pain that makes fear mongering so effective, and when the israeli population grows up being told all of their neighboring countries want to kill them, they quickly get defensive of the "only land where they can feel safe", but the only explanation ever provided for Why these neighboring countries are considered enemies is because theyre arabs.

and when it comes to palestine, it isnt even recognized as a country, nor identity. just a threat. ive talked to many people who are genuinely unaware of the occupation, and they arent willing to believe it either, because the media narrative has successfully shifted the blame on hamas. because "how could it be us? we want peace! its the terrorists who make us look bad! and their children, they grow up to be antisemites*, might as well get rid of them too!" they never stop to think what environment these children must grow up in to develop these "radical" ideas.

* what they mean by antisemite is really just antizionist, but the term anti/zionist isnt practiced in local dialect, being a zionist is treated as a given

any jew who stands against israels oppression is dubbed a self hating jew, but the biggest contributors to antisemitism is the people in charge of an ethnostate, because at any moment they could decide who is not white enough to be jewish, who is too jewish to be white, who stood against the current coalition government and who is an obedient dog.

israelis arent a monolith, but many of them have been won over, convinced its an "us v them" situation, when in reality it could never be the "us" that "loses"

the israeli government was waiting for an event like the massacre on the seventh of october to declare war, to have the so called "right to defend itself", so they could initiate the final steps of an ethnic genocide and displace, if not kill, all remaining palestinians. under the guise of bringing peace.

it isnt too late to call for a permanent ceasefire, to end the occupation.

please contact your representatives, attend protests and rallies if you are able. palestine will be free, and the flowers will rise again.

[silverislander]

holy fuck. google docs ate my entire character/planning/worldbuilding document for neri. it's all gone

#i clicked on an old link to it and it said it had been DELETED which i know i didnt do #i checked the trash too. its completely gone #thats months if not years worth of work down the drain #thats their entire first character draft. thats all of my notes on their family city and culture #thats everything i had on their TWELVE FUCKING SIBLINGS. full names ages jobs and family. all of it #thats my timeline of their life and explanation for the backstory playlist i made last year #that took so long to make. im not even sad yet i just think im in shock #levi.txt #thats also so much important info i gave the dm :( this will affect him too #im going to have to scrounge through other documents + discord for crumbs to build this back from the ground up #like i cannot stress enough how much work i put into them and how proud i was of it #im kind of devastated rn. ik this isnt a big deal in the grand scheme of life but man. that meant a lot to me #i had lists of things they believed about humans and so much info on triton culture that I MADE UP #THEY HAD 12 FULLY FLESHED OUT SIBLINGS I DID THE MATH FOR THEIR FUCKING AGES

[floorpancakes]

if i want to be a watanuki kinnie (/j) im allowed to be cringefail but if im cringefail at baking that has the reverse effect and makes me less watanukicore.....life is cruel

#trying desperately to make myself laugh rn #i followed this recipe to the letter but it exploded all over the oven without warning while proving #not while being cooked even #and i have to scrape it off the sides of the fucking oven and put my hard work in the trash #apparently i can salvage it but i feel so shitty right now im almost put off my food #I probably sound overdramatic but failure never feels good even if ur used to it #im used to failing at things other people can do just fine even with no explanation #but it always surprises me and bites me in the ass #cant be allowed to have this one thing without feeling like shit #the being alive as myself tax #theres always something that has to go wrong #im sorry you guys all came here for funnies this isnt funny enough #let me workshop it

[mrfoox]

i wish i trusted my own feelings more but here i am?

#me: i feel this way (: someone i like: um... are you sure? i think you feel more that way #me: oh shit... maybe i do? binch i gotta think this one through now.......... #i dont think my answer will change but its uh... worth another look #oliver said a while ago he thinks i'm in love with fabian.. and immidetly i said very confidently apperantly that i dont #and now ive been thinking about it and im like....... ok but am i? #told oliver again and he was like 'what i thought you said you werent? you sounded very sure about it' #yeah i mean...... at one hand i am but also...... i think my brain can do a lot of shit to keep me away from things that will probably end #badly. and genuinly i do not think me and fabian would have any chanse even if somehow he would be into me too #i'd never feel good enough for him. so i may just have gone into the whole thought of #its never going to happen so you obviously just like him in a friendly way. the end. idk #as usual romantic feelings for me is a mess. i dont divide love in that way naturally. for me love is love. if i love you i love you #i'd do anything for you and anything you'd want with me i'd be down for unless we are very unlike character wise #i just can see myself liking almost #all my friends in a romantic way? i can imagine it from my pov but its theirs i cant #not something i actively think about tho its just.... something i have and i know? #maybe this actually isnt how i think but theres another explanation (like oliver said 'being afraid of others leaving so youre willing to do #anything they want to keep them aorund) but until i learn otherwise this is what i keep thinking. i feel like a freak tho bc i dont think #anyone can really... understand it unless they feel soething similar ? or are super open or such. the friends ive told i think got a bit #scared. makes sense... but i cant make it sound better or more normal like yeah. everyone is safe from me romantically but also #almost everyone is welcome to hmu if they wanna try dating i guess. i speak big but i do have some exceptions #mainly bc of character meshing :')) #miranda talking shit