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#my bestie is already beaming flags for each one into my mind
monstertsunami · 11 months
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gay scugs
random alts bc im indecisive/almost forgot to put a flag on artis tail
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saifa-ao3 · 4 years
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Writing prompt: Undyne & Alphys are preparing for a date, but not really knowing how this works Undyne asks Papyrus for advice, while Alphys gets her advice from Mettaton. The end result is about what you'd expect.
Late again, but I did it!
Ao3 version here!Rating: General AudiencesTitle: You gotta dress to impress!Summary: For their upcoming date, Alphys and Undyne seek out advice from their best friends. Unfortunately, Papyrus and Mettaton aren't the best advice givers.Relationships: Alphys/Undyne
Tumblr version under the cut.
            Undyne shifted in her seat on Papyrus’ bed, causing the springs in the mattress to creak. Tilting her head curiously, she watched him scan his bookshelf for the fabled dating manual he insisted on lending her. “Papyrus, I don’t think that’s necessary,” Undyne said. She gave him a quizzical look while rubbing the back of her neck. 
            “Nonsense, Undyne!” Papyrus declared, snatching the book from its spot. “You have come to me for help, and it would be absolutely negligent of me to not bestow this upon my best friend! Besides, this dating book was imperative in helping me figure out my lack of romantic feelings on my most recent date. I’m sure it could help you too.” Papyrus thrusted the book out to her while posturing heroically, his grin wide and beaming with excitement.
            “I mean, if you really think so,” Undyne laughed with a crooked grin, unwilling to turn him down. Papyrus was a complete dork, but he was her favorite dork and number one bestie. He was the one person she could confide in about this predicament she had. Hell, why not give this a shot? She had been driving herself nuts over what to do for her date with Alphys, and she did come to him for a creative perspective after all.
            “Wonderful!” Papyrus cheered.
            Undyne flipped through the book and squinted as she skimmed the chapters. “Papyrus, I already confessed my feelings to her. Where does the dating section start?”
            “Seeing as I have memorized the entirety of this manual, I can tell you with confidence that chapter three is the first date, chapter four is the second date, chapter five is the third, and chapter six is—”
            “Okay, okay, I get it!” Undyne grimaced, looking a little overwhelmed. The thought of a potential second date hadn’t even crossed her mind yet since preparing for the first was so daunting. She had never gone on one before, and the only person she knew that had was Papyrus. For better or worse, he was her only hope in getting through this.
            “I assure you it is very thorough!”
            “I don’t doubt you.”
            “But if it helps you with your current goal, it is there to provide the support you need, although not as great as my support since I am the greatest at encouraging my friends! Just let me know how I can be of assistance, and I will not fail you. And remember, I believe in you!”
            “Yeah, you’re right! I can’t go wrong with you having my back!” She turned her attention back to the book and concentrated. “Let’s see… Since this is going to be our first proper date, I’ll go with chapter three.” After a few minutes of reading, her brow furrowed. Special occasion dates? The merits of lunch versus dinner outings? Not to mention the proper attire for each scenario! There was simply too much to consider, it was dizzying!
            “What’s wrong? You look a little frustrated.”
            “How many pages is this chapter?” she exclaimed impatiently.
            “Precisely forty—”
            “Papyrus! My date is in a couple hours! I don’t have time to sit here and read.”
            “How about I summarize it for you then?”
            “Please,” Undyne said, setting aside the book and rubbing her temples.
            “Very well then! First, have you decided on a romantic destination for this date?” he asked, leaning towards her and wiggling his brow.
            Looking flustered, Undyne leaned away from him and directed her sight to the Jolly Roger flag hanging behind him, “U-uh, I just figured we’d go to the dump or something. Maybe hang out in her lab? Really, whatever she wants to do.”
            “Hmmm…” Papyrus tapped his chin and squinted as he looked her over before accepting her answer. “That’s why there can always be a second date! To go on even more daring adventures with that love of yours!”
            “R-right!”
            “Now, let’s skip ahead to your date clothes.”
            Undyne grimaced and rubbed the back of her neck. “Yeah, uh, about that. My house burned down, remember? I’m a little short on dating attire.”
            “And this is where my greatness and heroism come in! For you see! I have just the thing for you!” Defying physics and the carpet’s coefficients of friction, Papyrus slid backwards to his closet. It was a peculiar sight considering he wasn’t moving his legs and it looked like he was skating backwards. By now Undyne had grown used to such oddities that it had become a normal thing where she no longer questioned it. “Behold! Behind closet number—! Well, my only closet!” Papyrus opened the door dramatically and bowed.
            Undyne knew Papyrus had an unusual fashion sense at times, but nothing prepared her for what hung in his closet. Nothing matched, though she couldn’t pinpoint what style of fashion her best friend was going for to begin with. Her crooked smile remained frozen as she took in the amazing disaster of Papyrus’ dating outfit. She wasn’t sure whether she was struck with admiration by Papyrus’ sheer confidence, or horror at the suggestion that this was the outfit he would lend her.
            But she came to Papyrus for his creativity, and she had to trust that. “Well, here goes nothing,” she said. “Bring it on!”
            “O-oh my god, w-what am I g-going to do?” Alphys spoke quickly, voice rising in panic as she paced her lab. When her hands weren’t fidgeting together nervously, she would adjust her glasses in an effort to keep herself busy. Sometimes it helped her think, or at least that’s what she told herself, but her anxiety riddled thoughts rendered that action useless. “W-what do I-I even wear? D-Do I have anything to wear? If I can’t find the perfect thing, what’s she going to think? Oh god, she’s going to realize how uncool and insecure I am.”
            “Darling, you have got to calm down,” Mettaton said, wheeling around to her in his box form. He held her gently by the shoulders and sighed. “Take a deep breath in, and out. Now, you are going to be just fine. Undyne likes you just the way you are. After all, there is so much to adore about you.”
            “Y-you really think so?”
            “Oh, darling, I know so.”
            Alphys still had doubts, but Mettaton always found a way to comfort her. If anyone could help boost her confidence in this dire time, it was him. She took in a shuddering breath to calm herself and folded her hands. “D-do you think you c-can help me? I-I’ve never gone on an actual date myself. I-I mean, I’ve written fanfiction before, and I-I’ve watched enough c-content about it from anime. B-but this is U-Undyne we’re talking about! I g-gotta impress her!”
            “Leave it to me, darling. I am going to put you through the most glamorous and exclusive MTT-brand makeover.”
            “O-oh, gosh…” Alphys shifted uncertainly in place. She never felt confident in her own skin, so she had doubts a makeover would be the remedy to boost her confidence. But Mettaton was always so confident and sure of himself, especially when he switched to his preferred body. Perhaps there was some magic to all that glitter and perfection after all. Oh, how did it go in Mew Mew Kissy Cutie again? The heroine would magically transform, surrounded by pastel lights and glitter, into a glamourous and stellar form for battle. Even the shyest of her friends gained the confidence they needed when they transformed too. If Alphys’ heroes could do it, then certainly she could too!
            “You are going to look absolutely fabulous, Alphys dear!” Mettaton announced. He flipped the switch in his back, causing his box form to open up and separate into pieces. Pink fog billowed out from inside the shifting box as his form tessellated into the humanoid shape he preferred. Through the pastel clouds, a rave of colorful lights illuminated Mettaton’s silhouette to accompany the blaring music that was his signature soundtrack. Glitter exploded and showered the lab and equipment, no doubt working into the delicate circuitry of priceless computers. 
            Deep down Alphys knew it would take months to clean every miniscule speck of it, but she couldn’t bring herself to be mad by the show. It was pretty glamorous and the lab was in desperate need of a deep clean anyways. All she could do was stare in awe at the show. No matter how many times she had seen him transform, she could never tear her eyes away. Of course, she took pride in her inventions, but seeing something she designed represent a real life anime scene was a dream come true.
            “O-oh, wow…!” Alphys gasped.
            “Ohhh, yesssss!” Mettaton said in a sultry voice. “Let there be drama! Let there be suspense! Bring out that fire in you, darling, because you are a star!”
            Surrounded by the lights and sounds, Alphys knew the kind of show she had to put on.
            Both of them were in stunned silence as they stared at each other. The constant dripping of water from stalactites in the garbage dump’s damp cavern marked the seconds until suddenly their laughter flooded the space and bounced off the walls. Undyne bent over while clutching her stomach and pointed at Alphys. Her poor girlfriend had makeup caked on her face with pink lipstick layered heavily on her lips and glitter covering her scales and clothes. Not to mention the fake eyelashes Alphys wore were thick with little hearts on the ends. “Oh my god, what happened to you?”
            Alphys snorted uncontrollably and covered her mouth. “O-oh gosh, I-I could say the same to you. A-are th-those basketballs on your shoulders?!”
            “They are!” Undyne cackled. “Alphys, come here. You didn’t have to put on all this makeup for me.”
            “I-it was Mettaton’s idea. I was a-afraid you w-wouldn’t like me after all.” Alphys said sheepishly. She stared at Undyne’s shirt and smirked. “Cool dude, huh?”
            “Yeah, it was Papyrus’ idea. He’s the cool one, honestly.”
            “I-I guess our friends give r-really bad advice.”
            “No kidding,” Undyne grinned. “Now, hang on. Let me help ya out with that.” She picked Alphys up and dunked her in the water, scrubbing away the makeup and glitter.
            When Alphys came up to gasp for air, she looked briefly at her reflection before turning to Undyne. “You really like me just the way I am?”
            “Of course!” Undyne beamed at her.
            “O-oh, wow…”
            Suddenly, a thunderous boom resounded through the cavern, causing Alphys to jump into Undyne’s arms. They held each other tightly as flaming confetti rained down across the dump. Together, they craned their heads up with eyes wide to watch the magnificent disaster that was Alphys’ planned welcome show to kick off their date. 
            “Eeep! S-something must have short circuited and triggered the confetti cannons!” Alphys squeaked.
            “The what?!” Undyne exclaimed.
            Another confetti cannon erupted, this time scattering both flaming debris and glitter. Lights flickered and strobed, making the crystals in the cavern throw a kaleidoscope of blues and greens. From the ceiling a disco ball descended and reflected light to paint the walls with diamond shapes.
            “Here comes the music,” Alphys said ominously.
            Somewhere a boombox played music that soon sped up in increments and increased to a deafening volume. Eventually, the beat skipped and stuttered on the same line until the static grew louder in volume. In turn, the lightbulbs in their fixtures hummed brightly until they were on the edge of burning out.
            Then the cavern plunged into darkness, or so it looked. The brightness of the bursting lights contrasted so harshly to the usual dimness of the garbage dump that they might as well have been blind. After a brief pause of silence, Alphys laughed nervously as she held onto Undyne, her arms wrapped around her girlfriend’s neck.
            “That was—” Undyne began.
            Several flaming towers erupted to surround them while several signs in the shape of letters lowered from the ceiling. One of the canons below belched up a massive fireball to set the letters alight, revealing Undyne’s name. Unfortunately, the ropes holding up the letters caught fire as well, and the letters came crashing down in front of them.
            Alphys, mortified with what her show had devolved into, squeaked and stuttered. She buried her face in her hands and mumbled out apologies. “I-I’m so sorry! I t-tried to make this memorable, and I-I thought a show would make this memorable. It’s like in the animes I watch, the p-protagonist tries to i-impress the one they like. Like in this one episode of ‘Doki Doki I Love You’ the p-protagonist takes this girl he likes to a fireworks show, but w-we don’t have any fireworks down here, at least not on h-hand. A-and I didn’t have a whole lot of time, but I still managed to scrounge this up. A-and, oh g-gosh, this was a complete disaster!”
            “ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THIS WAS AWESOME!” Undyne shouted.
            Alphys turned to Undyne and blushed. “R-really?”
            “HELL YEAH!”
            Alphys broke out into a shy smile and giggled.
            “You’re telling me you did this on short notice? You’re amazing! This has been the best date ever!” 
            Alphys’ scales flushed a deep red and she moaned in disorientation and disbelief. “I-I’m amazing?”
            Undyne, flashing a grin, planted a kiss on Alphys cheek. She cackled when Alphys grew limp in her arms and passed out with a smile.
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