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#much up to the very end. went out on a high note without the burdon of knowing it was coming
opens-up-4-nobody · 2 months
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#i walked into a situation today where my mom was effectively already dead. effectively bc her body was and is still alive. still breathing#painful groaning purrs. but her mind was gone yesterday. my dad said he showed her a picture of the mountains i took that day and told her#i loved her and she smiled. thats what he said. maybe he was just being nice. or maybe thats the last time she thought of me. i dunno. but#the human body is an incredible thing. shes got a heart still powering a broken body. too full of tumors to function anymore. stomach#streched like a pregnant mother. it happed really fast and now its happening very slow#im somehow probably better off than the rest of them. i only got here for the aftermath of a downslide. my daily life will b least effected#i only really saw her twice a year living so far away and she didnt text much. didnt call often. so life wont change much ill just kno shes#not there. which is sad. but theres nothing to b done abt it. life goes on. it hasnt been all bad tho. its nice to talk to my family abt her#how incredible she was. bc she was. wish her mom wasnt here tho. she doesn't deserve to b here. my mom wouldnt want her here. she didnt want#her here. but anyway. i wish her body would just let her go now. so we can sleep. so this can be over. so she can rest#but even like this shes stubborn and resilient. they say it could go on for days but i hope not. may the universe let her rest shes gotta b#so tired after 10 years of this. but i have no regrets. she knew how i felt abt her. and i dont think she had regrets either. she did so#much up to the very end. went out on a high note without the burdon of knowing it was coming#i dunno. its just such a strange experience to watch the empty shell of your mother sleeping like a gurgling baby#unrelated
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skvaderarts · 4 years
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Soliloquy Chapter 1: Advent
You can check out the Masterlist here for more links to places to read!
Otherwise, you can read the new chapter below!
Chapter One: Advent
Stepping through the portal that Vergil had cut through the fabric of time and space was perhaps the most disorienting thing that Dante had experienced in his entire life. Well, maybe that was an understatement. Everything about being on Malet Island had been a massive trip into a new dimension of confusion and headaches. But this was a very close second. Everything seemed to go faster than it normally did but, at the same time, things were slow enough to take in and try to comprehend. It was a blur of bright light that fluctuated from blisteringly bright to suffocatingly dark that seemed to transcend time and space itself. And that was probably because it did transcend time and space itself.
Oh, and it was probably the most nauseating experience Dante had gone through in a long time.
As quickly as it had started, it ended. Although experience had taken less than a few seconds, it had felt more like a minute. Dante landed feet first on the cobblestone pavement, his head swaying slightly before he shook it to regain his senses. He stretched before looking around to gain a bearing on his location. Vergil was in the process of standing up and brushing himself off, as he hadn’t landed quite as gracefully as he normally did. Being kicked in the back spartan style through a tear in reality tended to do that to a person.
“Dang it,” Dante scoffed, trying and failing to repress a playful snicker,” I was hoping you’d land on your sword. You know, see what it feels like for yourself for once.”
Vergil straightened his coat and turned around to face Dante. He couldn’t have looked more unamused if he tried to. “Oh, I am very aware of what it feels like, brother.”
Dante shook his head and let out a short laugh. “How’d that happen? You stab yourself with your own sword?!”
Vergil didn’t answer his brother’s rhetorical question. Instead, he opted to just stare at him blankly, his silence saying everything that it needed to given the context of the situation. After a moment Dante slowly stopped laughing and stared back at him, a look somewhere disbelief and confusion crossing his face. “... Wow… um, yea... You need professional help, Vergil. That’s… that’s pretty messed up. You okay?”
In an unflinching display of unamused irritation, Vergil shook his head once. “Absolutely not.”
An uncomfortable silence settled between them. The alley they stood in was a veritable audio sink. Barely any ambient noise from the nearby road traveled far enough down this dead-end inlet to pierce the uncomfortable silence. Though neither of the twins would ever admit it, they were starting to notice how bad they were at basic conversation with one another. It was actually astounding how quickly almost every conversation they had turned to an unpleasant experience that dwelled on topics neither of them wanted to relive. Dante shifted in discomfort, switching his center of gravity back and forth between his left and right feet. He shook his head and sighed, looking down at the pavement for a moment before looking back up at this troubled brother again. What on earth went through his twin’s mind sometimes. “Seriously Vergil, you okay?”
The eldest Son of Sparda gave his brother a thoughtful look before turning to walk towards the end of the alley. Dante opted to follow him, coming to the conclusion that he had reached his tolerance for genuine progress with his brother today. Vergil didn’t seem to be equipped to deal with continuous emotional conversation, and Dante wasn’t going to try and force him. He’d made it a decent amount of time without finding Yamato embedded in his sternum, and his older twin had shown an unusually high amount of restraint in not putting it there.
The twins stepped out onto the main sidewalk and were greeted by the blinding light of the early morning sun peeking over the rooftops of the adjacent street. A stray car or two passed on either side of the road, contributing to what little noise there was to be heard. Rows of attached business lined the street, some with apartments above them. A few quaint townhouses were squeezed in between the shops; a few planters with thin birch trees sprouting from them lined the sidewalks providing a comfortable amount of shade to pedestrians. The smell of salty water permeated the air as a light breeze rustled the leaves of the nearby trees. It was almost picturesque.
They both stood there quietly for a moment, silently taking in the calm. It was the first time in a long time that they had experienced this kind of quiet serenity. The first time in an immeasurably long time that they had just enjoyed silence the presence of each other’s company. Vergil glanced around the street, taking in the area. Just as he did, the vintage brass streets lights flickered off, their automated timer taking note of the ambient light level. Something seemed to occur to him, causing him to stop and turn to his younger twin. “Where are we then?” He spoke plainly, seemingly trying to change the subject from their previous conversation. Dante decided to chalk it up as a loss for now and simply move on. There would be another time. They had plenty of time.
He glanced up and down the street, taking in their surroundings. This area seemed vaguely familiar to him. He could almost sware that he had been here before, but wasn’t sure how recently or for what purpose. This wasn’t a part of town he spent much time in, but at least he knew what town they were in. “Capulet. Pretty sure this is Capulet.”
Vergil nodded slowly, seeming considering this for a moment. “Which way then?” Dante shrugged obtusely. “Can’t say for sure. I don’t spend much time down by the waterfront. I live further inland from here. You know, where all the crime is.”
Vergil scoffed at the comment, shaking his head. His twin brother really was something else, wasn’t he? Before he could enquire as to possible context clues or landmarks they could use to regain their bearings, Dante stepped forward and looked down the long street towards the right, nodding in confirmation to himself as if he’d figured something out. He casually started to walk in the direction he was facing, gesturing over his shoulder for Vergil to follow him as he headed away from where they had just been. “It’s this way. Now I recognize this place. Had a run-in with an interesting demon on a foggy morning a while back around here. Tried to take my head off with two blades,” He kept a steady pace up the street as Vergil caught up with him in the blink of an eye,” There’s a park up this way. It’s basically the center of town. Once we get there, I can tell where we are.”
With that, the pair walked briskly towards the end of the block, crossing the oversized roundabout that surrounded the square into the park. The lush greenery of the hedges that surrounded the park was bordered by a tall wrought iron fence. Each of the four crosswalks that connected to this central park area was aligned with entry gates for ease of foot traffic flow, so they didn’t have any issues finding a way in. The twins entered the park and followed the path into the central plaza where they both came to a stop for a moment to figure out their current position.
“We need to go this way, Vergil. Vergil?”
Just as Dante was going to question his brother’s silence and explain that they should go north from here towards the upper part of the hillside to reach his office, he stopped. Something had seemingly drawn Vergil’s attention, as he was standing slightly off to the side, only half facing him. Dante allowed his gaze to follow his older brother’s and then stopped once his eyes landed at the object of Vergil’s fascination.
Fuck… How on earth had he forgotten about the statue?
Capulet City was well known in the region for a few unfortunate happenings over the years, a status that had now been totally dwarfed by the calamitous Redgrave City Disaster. While being the resting place of the once again slumbering Temen-ni-gru was nothing to scoff at, and Abigale’s fires had raged for several days after the gargantuan demon had lit the town ablaze during his attack, being a mecca for demonic activity was, while an unattractive trait for a city to possess, a totally different thing entirely from having an entire city literally turned inside out from the tectonic plates up. But, one of the few good things the city was known for was this park and its towering onyx statue of the Dark Knight Sparda astride his dark steed, a horse that, in retrospect, was almost certainly a Geryon. People came from far and wide to take pictures of the monument the city had erected to the dark knight over the now filled in hole where Temen-ni-gru had once emerged from the earth. And in the process of trying to find their way home, Dante had completely forgotten that the stature was here as he had grown so accustomed to seeing it over the years that he didn’t even register it as he passed by it today. To be succinct, there were several things about this park that he had put out of his day to day thoughts, this fine piece of craftsmanship included.
Vergil seemed to be taking a moment to consider it, having not set foot here during or since it’s construction over a decade ago. The art installation’s significance was not lost on the eldest Son of Sparda, nor was it’s geographic location. They could both sense the demonic tower below them, a powerful reminder of the underworld’s never-ending connection to the human world. But then again, nothing about their father was lost on him. Not his legend, not his legacy, and most certainly his bottomless grief at his sudden and unexplained disappearance. They were all things he still carried with him and would never shed; a forthright burdon anchoring him firmly in all things that he did. Vergil shifted his gaze downward and then away from the monolith, quietly dispelling the profound internal battle that he would never win for now.
It was a simple, immutable fact that he still mourned their father’s loss and always would. He just hadn’t dwelled on it in a long while now.
Dante didn’t need to say anything. Interrupting his brother’s train of thought to garner the answer to a question that he already knew the answer too would be utterly pointless and unkind, and this was one silence he was willing to wait out for the sake of its importance. After what felt like a decade, Vergil finally turned back to his brother and joined him at his side, eager to leave this place and his unbridled feelings of grief behind him. He drifted past Dante as he approached, not making eye contact. “... Which way is it then? Or are we still lost?”
The younger twin pointed towards the northwest, taking a mental note of Vergil’s understandably unaccommodating mood. “It’s up there, probably about a mile or so. If we’re lucky, we might make it before one of the girls burns it down in a fit of rage or something.”
Vergil didn’t speak. He simply nodded in silence and followed Dante in the correct direction. Despite the fact that they were just traversing normal human streets, he couldn’t have felt more out of his element if he’s tried. It was the first time in a long time that he’d simply walked somewhere and something hadn’t jumped out and tried to kill him. And he didn’t have the emotion reserves left to contemplate how that made him feel right now.
-~-
The front of the office was surprisingly just as Dante had left it. The doors were still attached for once and the front windows were still intact. The only notable difference was the lack of light coming from the sign out front. It was only then that something occurred to the younger twin: how long had they been gone? It had only felt like a day or two, but unless the sign had shorted out (again) then they had been gone a little longer than he’s originally thought.
“So um Vergil,” Dante started as they approached the front steps,” About how long do you think we were gone?”
Vergil stopped as if to consider the question for a moment. He’d been quiet for about fifteen minutes now, more than likely still lingering on his internal baggage. “That could be rather hard to tell. Much like the human world, time works in zones in the underworld. The time discrepancies are just a bit more… pronounced in some places than they are here. Some parts of the underworld are stagnant and don’t have time at all. Some don’t even have a day and night cycle. And they are all prone to shift under certain circumstances.”
Dante sighed. “So we could have been gone ten minutes or ten years for all we know. That’s what you’re saying, right?”
Vergil shook his head. “Let me clarify. At best, we’ve been gone a few days, at most a few weeks. Volatile as the underworld’s perception of time maybe, I can’t think of a region where time distorts quite that far in the timespan of fewer than three days.”
Dante shrugged as they started up the front steps. “Nothing I can do about it now. But I guess that explains why you kinda look younger than me now, at least.”
Before Vergil could retort, a faint male voice on the other side of the door could be heard. It was unfamiliar to him. The voice was accompanied by the sounds of two other female voices from what his keen sense of hearing could pick up, but he couldn’t discern any of the owners. From what he could make out, the man was saying something about the rent not being free and him having the deed to something. 
Dante smirked and shook his head, snickering under his breath. This was no mystery to him. “Good to see that they are still hanging around.”
Just as Vergil was going to ask what Dante was going on about, the doors to the front of the office burst open, and out came one of three people came out. Vergil was correct in his assumptions of their genders from what he could tell, but the man he didn’t recognize at all. The man stopped dead in his tracks and let out a loud, clearly overjoyed laugh. “Well, I’ll be damn! Where the hell have you been for so long, Dante!”
At the mention of Dante’s name, the two women who were just stepping through the doorway (presumably walking a short distance behind him) raced ahead and stopped dead in their tracks. In unison, both of them shouted Dante’s name, shock, concern, and disbelief heavy in their tone. The trio stepped forward and immediately set upon the youngest Son of Sparda, greeting him happily. The one with the black hair that Vergil now recognized as Arkham’s daughter (though he couldn’t remember her name) Immediately batted at him in frustration. “You crazy bastard! I was starting to think you weren’t coming back!” The well-dressed man in the hat reached up and removed it, clasping it in his hand as he laughed a the scene unfolding in front of him. Dante seemed to be about three seconds shy of catching a bullet from his younger friend. She was clearly less than amused with his leave of absence.
“You’ve been gone for six weeks, Dante,” A familiar voice spoke,” I was just starting to wonder I you were coming back myself...”
Vergil felt a barely contained barrage of complex emotions hit him at the sight of the blond devil. Her presence truly took him off guard in the worst way possible. He wasn’t sure if he was showing his seething rage, and he’s wasn’t entirely sure if he cared at this moment in time either. Though no one had seemingly noticed his presence quite yet as he was standing at the bottom of the stairs and slightly behind his brother. But he recognized her anywhere. How could he forget such an instrumental person from his time on Malet Island?
“What the girls are trying to say is that you have perfect timing because we were just having a little conversation about this,” The older gentleman produced a white envelope from his pocket and returned it to Dante in one elegant movement, still laughing to himself as he did so. 
Dante shook his head and allowed a smirk to cross his face. “You guys are just the worst, ya know that. I mean, I take a vacation for a few weeks and you figure I’m not coming back?” There was a tone of humor to his jest that was immediately lost when he glanced back over his shoulder and recalled the fact that Vergil was still with him. And that he looked undeniably pissed. It wasn’t something that anyone else but him would probably pick up on, but it didn’t slip past him for a second. “Um, Vergil?” Three additional sets of eyes followed Dante to his brother as he said his name, just noticing him for the first time in their excitement. Lady looked shocked, to say the least, Morrison was looking back and forth between the twins in obvious bewilderment and Trish… well, Trish and Vergil were making what was perhaps the most uncomfortable eye contact of their respective lives. Vergil seemed to be looking into her more than he was at her, obviously thinking rather intensely and Trish was returning his stare, albeit with a look of caution akin to the sort that you would give a big cat that looked ready to attack if you approached it in the wild.
It took Dante all of about three milliseconds to figure out what the issue was here and, although he didn’t understand the history behind it, he wasn’t stupid enough to be ignorant of the notion that Trish and Vergil had prior. And he also wasn’t stupid enough to not notice that Vergil was very clearly considering entering devil trigger and ripping her throat out with his bare hands. Dante carefully placed himself just close enough between them that it made further action on either of their ends unfeasible and he shot Vergil a look, clearly asking him what was going on. Trish took the opportunity to step towards the others and give the twins a parting look, silent trepidation evident in her gaze. “... We were just leaving. Let’s have this conversation later.”
Dante wasn’t sure which of them she was actually addressing, but he didn’t get much time to think about it as, as if from nowhere, a loud screech split through the air. Everyone stopped and turned their head in the direction of the van that had just pulled up, missing the stairs and the side of the building by mere centimeters. Dante would’ve laughed at the awful timing if it might not have been the spark that could set everything alight. He heard a car door open and then slam shut on the opposite side of the car and then a familiar face stepped around the front of the car. The white-haired young man stopped dead in his tracks as if he had just been slammed face-first into an invisible brick wall. He stared in evident shock, wide-eyed at the sight before him before taking a decided far left into instantaneous, unbridled rage, his casual demeanor shattering like glass. At that, Dante let out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding and chuckled to himself under his breath. Nero really was Vergil’s son, wasn’t he? “Hey, Nero…”
The younger white-haired man shot him a look of white-hot seething rage mixed with other emotions he couldn’t quite place, but he knew they were probably bad nonetheless. Oh shit.
“Dante,” Nero shouted at the top of his lungs,” What the fuck is this bullshit?!”
And then he triggered.
… Oh shit...
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