#maybe its the year+ of isolation

[felsicveins]

Alrighty, another ex revealed! Meet Barley! I demanded that @persistenttenderness conjure up a bf for John Dory and this is who they came up with ❤️ 🐎

#ill reblog with added details later #have to consult #trolls #trolls 3 #trolls band together #trolls jd #jd trolls #john dory #john dory trolls #trolls john dory #brozone #man .. it really is just him huh #like okay i dont think its likely he spent all 20 years in isolation so maybe .. he was wandering across lonesome flats #and maybe there was a cowboy herding some of those wack buffalo #and maybe they got to chatting #the full story will come later ; ) #dw trolls #dreamworks trolls #concept and story by lilith design by me

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Not sure if this theory makes any sense at all but I'm starting to believe that there's no time skip between Wally's phone calls and what we see/hear in the show's Media/Merchandise. If we see the Toyland call being made before the Homewarming episode then it would make sense that Wally's expecting Barnaby to come over soon. As well as the Homewarming sketch from the prior update. (I don't know, still kind of brainstorming this perspective)

that theory Does make sense and i've been considering it! the "timeline" is such a nebulous thing right now because we still... don't really know! there are too many variables and too many Maybes for any solid answer.

maybe the reality that the neighbors live in exists outside of time like you say, and like half of me suspects. there's so much reality fuckery already present, but I'm also... unsure of how much merit this holds given what we know / can infer about how time passes in Home. i'm putting this theory on a low shelf to look at but not prioritize

maybe it really has been 50 years, and Barnaby is either still around / Wally is still in contact with him, or Barnaby... isn't there. who knows, maybe Wally was just verbalizing some Wishful Thinking. i mean, Wally is a bit of an unreliable narrator, isn't he? we can't assume that everything he says is entirely accurate or truthful. and i mean, if it's been 50 years it makes sense that Wally would be pushing for connection / to revive WH. who knows how long he's been trying.

hm... i mean. it could be a mix of that and the Outside Of Time theory. who knows, maybe W is receiving calls from different points in the timeline - Wally may have started out just calling, and has just graduated to invading the WH website / getting pushy with the envelopes and media that's been sent to the WHRP. maybe Wally got tired of waiting for W to respond before W was even born. who's to say!

#i mean. idk the emphasis wally puts on Its So Quiet makes my brain tilt its head #it feels like wally breaking composure before he pastes the Facade back on with '-during homewarming' #that and just the way he phrased 'everyones usually so busy so its just me and home for a long while' #Usually so busy. Usually. why not Always? or Is? #usually. #and then the 'its just me and home for a long while' #the phrasing here has Connotations i think! #homebogging #welcome home speculation #wh speculation #OF COURSE. I HAVE TO DEBUNK MYSELF! #what we hear / see from Wally is - ironically - more genuine than the WHRP's or W's recovered media (save the eddie excerpts) #the WH media shows us the ideal homewarming - where everyone is getting into the spirit and spending time together and the like #but then wally could be telling us what homewarming is Really like - lonely. quiet. #WHICH MAKES SENSE THEMATICALLY! and it mirrors how christmas time is. its marketed as this joyful thing that brings people together #when in reality its lonely and stressful. i know i certainly never feel more lonely than i do at that time of year! #so there's just. layers. right now im simultaneously believing in the time discrepancy And them existing outside of time #im leaning on the first one but you know! #BUT!!! IM CONFIDENT THAT THE HOMEWARMING WALLY WAS CALLING FROM WAS NOT THE ONE WE SAW IN THE UPDATE. #wally spoke with enough familiarity about the time of year to make me think 'hes lived through many of these hasnt he' #it could be that time Has passed for the neighbors and its been many homewarmings. #it could be that it Started as what the commercials/update showed us. #but as time passed maybe it became a time where everyone just... Isolates for one reason or another. so now it's just quiet and lonely #im still rolling it all around in my head! many factors and implications to consider w/ this update! #Take All Of This With A Grain Of Salt As Usual!

[tiny-breadcrumbs]

I think Nanyin royalty AU will be a wild power struggle. Full of cutthroat unhinged conspiracy and backstabbing left and right.

1. There is the mild mannered and quite sickly crown prince Li Xiangxian. But no, this is not about him, let that man enjoy his peace.

2. This is about the martial arts genius second prince, Li Xiangyi. That typical imperial brother who lead jurisdiction part of the palace, and basically the strongest fortress in front of the well-loved crown prince.

3. Rumor has said Li Xiangyi learn from the elusive master Qi Mushan since the very young age and inherited the famous yangzhouman.

4. The crown prince, true to his soft hearted nature, once saved a young kid and bring him back to be his little brother study partner. That kid will grown up as Shan Gudao

5. On the side, as a cousin part of the throne is the Jiao family who acted as a door keeper to Nanyin more mystical artefact. The daughter of that family is one who born with ambition to rule and eyes for the crown. She play so many tangled thread behind the palace wall.

6. Shan Gudao is someone that has been planted by that family to keep an eye about the inner court. Greed will blown his ego out of proportion and later he will joined Jiao Liqiao in her coup.

7. Qiao Wanmian is an administrative agent that work under Li Xiangyi. A capable woman that everyone think will marry in as a princess consort. But she know better than to step into court politic.

8. The palace actually in correspondence with Tianji Hall about their mechanism and exchanging knowledge about trap room blue print. The second prince find their young master a cute kid and take a liking to him but unable to get too close because He Xiaohui kept him in a polite (wary) distance.

9. The Jiao family regularly purchasing teenager from Di Fortress under the palace order to make a soldiers. Unbeknown to the inner court, only half the kid ended up in the military camp while the other half being used as a lab rat for the new technique they developed.

10. Di Feisheng is one of those that climb high enough to be stationed practically as a bodyguard for Li Xiangyi. But its not like Li Xiangyi need a bodyguard at first so he make Di Feisheng as his sparring partner more often than not.

11. Somewhere along that, the comfortable nickname of A-Fei begin to stick.

12. Sometimes when investigating near the border, where people doesn't really care of fear the court, Li Xiangyi will use the name Lianhua, a mere travelling merchant with his servant A-Fei (who always scare the shit out everyone with his glare).

13. Li Xiangyi with all his brilliance, once trust people so easily with naive innocence to see good. Thus unable to sniff the first step of rebellion brewing near the inner court.

14. The height of the conflict started when Yun Biqiu, one of Li Xiangyi men, fall for the sweet tongue of the Princess. From there on, poison and slander flying around here and there in a broad daylight. Creating chaos from the inside. A first step into the descend of the dynasty.

15. Fang Duobing left his wheelchair behind and grow stronger. He start to exchange a monthly secret letter with the second prince.

16. The flag of rebellion reach their highest when the fight occur in the inner palace. Many live lost that day and the second prince gone missing after poisoned by his own subordinate.

17. Di Feisheng got tangled up in the neatly orchestrated spot to make him look like he is on Jiao Liqiao side. A small mercy, said the princess, because I want him.

18. Li Xiangyi unfortunately believe that.

19. It is with a burning rage and thirst for revenge a letter came into Di Feisheng hand. And he know enough of his prince penmanship to rush as fast as a lightning to the east sea. He came to retrive and protect the prince. Not knowing the man will ask for his head. Nor expect the prince will not see where his loyalty has been placed long ago.

20. Only weeks later, Tianji Hall will receive the news and proceed to cut ties with the new court. Fang Duobing never receive that month reply from Li Xiangyi.

--

00. This maybe end in the east sea to close the chapter of power struggle and start a new book of quack doctor Li Lianhua from Jianghu. Who knows. Certainly not the people in Nanyin. Not Jiao Liqiao either.

#Maybe its years in the future when Li Lianhua will knock on the gate of Tianji Hall and asked (kidnapped) xiaobao to join his adventure #I will go into dfs whump where he will exhaust his inner energy to repel the effect of the poison from lxy body #then got captured by jiao liqiao #maybe she broke him or he isolated his mind willingly to escape the disgust #and thats why when llh stumble upon him once again he will not havr his memory #fang xiaobao will be so done with all the awkward silent and blank stare and takes matter into his own hand #I vote for him to shove those two into bed and told them to just talk or fuck #someone pls write this #mysterious lotus casebook #di feisheng #li lianhua #fang duobing #Nanyin AU

[needylittlegirl]

theres a 99% chance we’re gonna move so i have to start packing little things now cause it makes the transition easier but i hate it i dont want to

#i know i sound like am immature little kid just pouting and stomping my foot #but i’ve had to move every two years since i was like 14 for so many different reasons #each place ive moved to just got increasingly worse so i think i have the right to pout like a 14 yr old girl #but its just dumb #if i start taking stuff down now itll make it easier to leave cause it wont feel like my space by then #its what ive always done #if i pack weeks ahead of time it just feels like im leaving a hotel or something #but right nows the hard part #im not even over my childhood home/s #i cant talk about those without crying and its been 20 years #i’d just like to stay in one place for awhile #we wont be going far cause me and my sister both have jobs right here but #its still different #im tired of seeing my stuff in boxes im tired of not feeling safe in my own space #it all just makes me so unstable cause i cant plant my roots anywhere #idk maybe its stupid #if everything goes according to plan #we’ll probably be moving a little after memorial day #and all i want to do is lock my door and refuse to let anyone do anything #im still just that little girl that was leaving her childhood bedroom and moving hours away #tbd #i didnt even get to skate today cause its raining #whatever im gonna get in bed and watch movies til i can go to sleep #if ive been bad at responding to msgs or not posting as much . this is why 👍 #any sort of change like this makes me isolate myself like crazyy

[bunkernine]

society if hoo had them at uni age and the lost trio went to chb and chiron is like "how tf are ANY of u alive and unclaimed". wilderness was just community college.

#on a serious note this changes a lot actually. annabeth and percy would not be in chb anymore so when percy goes missing #its like. a genuine possibility and fear because demigods don't make it that old. there is also some added time between tlo and tlh as well #further adding to jasons isolation as being even WEIRDER than everyone else. he also would've been praetor for longer so maybe the romans #wouldve cared more. this also does away with the plot hole of ppl not giving a shit that jason piper and leo (and dylan) straight up #dipped. introducing piper especially to a summer camp makes chb less appealing because they're too old for that and thus makes their #departure from chb make more sense in toa. yet also it opens up the possibility of new rome uni.... which i cannot see any reason as to why #leo would not go there!!!!! outside of being banned cuz he bombed new rome lol. but pipers sexuality arc works for college too!!! ur never #too old to find urself. but also this is the question of if you are able to relatively function in society (this is more for piper leo fran #and i guess percy) then why would you even fight this prophecy??? anyway lol them being college aged is perfect cuz percy is literally #going to a new place and having a new transition with new ppl... like u do in college LOL. now the question is would hazel still be 13. nic #is a lot older at this point and perhaps has the same age gap as bianca and him did 🤔 cant remember. but also don't know why hazel was 13 #in the first place lol. idk. in my college hoo she is just a senior in hs about to graduate from spqr and thinking about staying there or #possibly going to newru after seeing frank make the decision the previous year! SAD! #anyway in hoo. percy and annabeth are sophomores. frank and the lost trio are freshman. #but then in toa. percy annie frank and the lost trio are all graduating cuz percy got held back and Annabeth failed after tartarus fr. #but then also know that piper never went to newru and is adamant about going to mortal uni. and leo kills in newru but is bored. nvm i #forgot he died 🧍‍♂️ ummmmmm ok. ignore leo. and jason actually. so um. ok that really threw me off but are u getting it. that's when apollo #is like 'heeyyyyy i need help pwease 🥺' and they're all like 'dude.' #OK! #but also i ackowedge that this is a children's book and i am not its demographic so god be with you.

[buttercupart]

why doesn't chara & asriel live with toriel at all?

everyone's gone on without you

#ok now to actually explain it and not just post no context imgs #it was a while from the time monsterkind was freed to when asriel and chara came back/came to the surface #and in that time life had continued going on without them. as it had the same way when they died #im thinking it was anywhere around a year before frisk in their infrequent trips to the underground #was able to convince flowey to take a piece of their soul so he could hold his goat form together somewhat #and bring him back to the surface #but for chara it took longer. two years maybe? from monster independence day to come back #because frisk had to first find out where chara's real original soul was being kept and then find it and stuff #i can talk about this another time its such a huge can of worms my god #BUT BASICALLY it was a few years and by the time both kids were integrating back into society #the lives of those they loved had changed so drastically #chara didnt know their parents split up. they didnt know asgore killed human children or that their mother went into isolation #not until the game events anyways #and when they cam to the surface and saw all of that stuff -in person- as well as how well/poorly one parent was doing over another #theyyyy didnt take it well. like their mother had a new partner (doesnt matter who take your pick) and was raising frisk #and their dad was super mega turbo divorced and depressed and had nothing but his garden #in their mind toriel didnt need them anymore. she had a new partner and a new human kid and chara had served their purpose #so they elected to stay with asgore so he would have Someone anyone in his life and asriel followed #iiittts a huge mess basically. huge emotional landmine mess of insane proportions #undertale #my art #ask

[narutomaki]

I hate that I hate doing things in my own dude but it's so fucking boring !!!

#i dont go out to eat and i dont go to the movie theater so like the two biggest Default Hang activities are completely non-options for me #i dont like seeing movies in theatre 1) the local one sucks and 2) i cant sit still for over a half hour in a chair that makes me want to #become an arsonist. #ive been to Fancy Good Fun movie theatres and seen Incredible Higjly Rated films and still been like #20 mins in. is it going to be over soon? can i leave? please? #i like going to the library and shopping and walking down by the river and in the woods #but i also Dont Like The Beach because sand makes me want to become a fucking terrorist and the water safety index thing #sent me on a spiral sooo bad ♡ also im too body conscious to enjoy myself #the public pools okay excepts its expensive and over crowded 100% of the time #rock beachs are good i like swimming i just eugh #i also. dont like going to the gyms indoor pool. #its so fucking echoy in there i get a migraine thinking about it #i do like their sauna tho but. again. priced out of that experience! wahoo! also the stairs there are designed to torture me #i like eating outside i like picnics in theory i just cant get comfortable sitting in like 98% of places for more than like 30 mins. #at some point some part of my body is going to start hurting so bad i want to throw up. #i like playing video games and board games but i dont have any consoles or board games so like. #man. idk! #i hate doing things alone bcus i Was Alone for 3 years with my only social contact being my abusive family #i would speak to them maybe 3 times a month and get out of the house maybe 2 times and #idk! idk its just like! okay! im done being socialy isolated!!! #>every activity that you can do to hang out with people is unappealing to me or causes me physical damage #😭 okay nvm!!!

[puzzlekinq]

cant sleep because im seething with anger

#been laying here for like 40 minutes fantasizing about finally snapping and telling my mom everything i really think and feel #if i ever came out to her she would end up cutting me off like she did to my aunts and uncles and cousins #basically im alone and my parents and siblings are the only family i can be in contact with right now and its isolating #off topic but yeah #i miss having a big family and people besides my parents that i could rely on. people i felt like i could actually breathe around #idk. whatever #why do i feel responsible for her actions all the time. its been my job to keep her stable and listen to her vent for years #but i never say anything about my own feelings. because she would make me feel stupid and ridicule me. lol #all she does is make me feel like shit most of the time. shes always in a bad mood and shes always whining and always pessimistic #and yeah i get along with her for the most part but lately her attitude has been weighing on me a lot. i cant criticize or disagree with her #because she'll just get mad. shes always been an angry person. thats why i hardly spoke to her from ages 10-15 #maybe i jsut wanted to give her another chance. maybe i felt sympathy for her. shes had it rough her whole life #but when shes still bitter no matter how many times i comfort her and let her vent and cry to me and when she chooses her husband over me #every single time he fucks up (which is like. constantly) and always takes his side when they inevitably make up after a huge fight #it feels like i'll never be able to make her happy. it feels like i should stop trying. if she wants to be full of hatred #and have a shitty husband then fine. i cant fix her like and i cant hold the weight of her mistakes #*life

[slugandthorn]

Putting my journal down realizing maybe I shouldn't make a written plan to socialize more efficiently

#.txt #Is efficiently the right word. Diary entry incoming. #Going back and forth in recent days with feeling okay with one sided social stimulation and that's just kind of how my brain works #And recognizing I will not look like a well rounded person because I'm not able to maintain other people's interest in an acquaintanceship #It is likely. At least some part due to like labor isolation and all I do is work I do not have life events to interest people #All I can talk about is video games but incredibly limits the social pool because I like bad games. #And also to some degree distrust and the assumption my presence is unwanted. Which I've been working on a lot! #Today in particular is probably just a bad day. #And I have been very focused on life plans for the past week or so which has become very daunting #Planning on starting a business this year. Which is probably why I'm stressing about being able to reach people. #As it will become financially relevant and not just a personal failing I have accepted. #Reasonably it is probably a therapy thing to address being so afraid of other people. But I do not want to go to therapyyyy I'll do it. #Myself. #Normally. #Not dipping into woe is me I have no one territory at least as bad as I did when I was younger. Recognizing a pattern that I am enacting. #My responsibility to improve. Yada yada. I just wish it was a bit easier to feel my like. Presence. #And the constant improvement mindset straying into never good enough is very difficult to avoid. #And it's not a matter of being a good enough person to have close relationships. But I think its easiest to ascribe personal failure #When you are unable to do something. Well the most likely culprit is probably never leaving the house and being undiagnosed. #Which I can arguably do things about. #Also I'm tired. But I'm going to work on my resume tonight anyway and hope tummy pain passes and maybe talking to people will be easier #Another day.

[manslutz]

gonna word vomit in these tags oops

#rambling to myself whatever #ik i just need to settle into this flat and get used to living by myself but im kinda like #hmm have i cursed myself w being lonely #i think also this flat is pretty dark bc the other buildings block out the sunlight so my seasonal depression is going crazy in advance #like its dumb but im not very approachable irl so i dont have many uni friends on my course and im just kinda #idk how i feel about it all #if my timetable stays the same i have tues and wed off and im getting in my head wo the distraction #like ik ill be fine in theory but im overthinking rn and its not even 3am lonely hours #and ik i can go out and do things by myself bc i often do but sometimes its nice to have the company #i made most of my friends at dorms but it was intercollegiate so they all go to diff unis to me so timetables clash double #and my closest uni friend is studying aboard in ny rn :( #idk i just feel like sometimes im not on the same path as everyone at uni rn #or maybe ur 20s are really just isolating idk #esp after the pandemic and many many lockdowns like i took a year out and all my old friends went straight to uni #and the diff in experience just meant they got closer and i got further #i only talk to one of them now and shes my ride or die but also she was kinda in a diff group of friends #and its funny (?) to think my main friendship group all still talk to each other #i just dont think im an easy person to be friends with #and idk why #its not for lack of trying or anything i just dont think im the type of person who has longlasting relationships #idk im not going into that rn #i also chose to go to a uni close to home so theres a lot that ive already done #its ok i can always do them again #but also im kinda like what if i just go home !! lmao #and itd be nice but i think itd make me feel worse when im back in the flat #hh whatever let me just get on with it and move on #its only 5 weeks until reading week and i only have this year left of uni #endure endure endure

[clementineskesh]

and its like i know everyone in every stage of life is dealing with a similar feeling of loss of time (except for antimaskers and covid denialists ig who basically just had a weird couple of months) and that the cult of youth is a harmful and serious thing and that that is by far not the worst part of covid by any measure. but i think i missed out on a lot of early adult milestones of myself and my friends because of it, and it impacted and in some ways arrested who i am in ways i dont like and am constantly struggling to rectify and its just sad? i think its okay to be sad about it. it sucks, i feel behind and lost and while i think i would anyway, i also think the effects of living in this pandemic has worsened it.

#vent #sorry #i keep seeing tweets dunking on someone expressing this and i get it but its also so annoying like. yes everyone feels it but maybe. #the global event. has impacted growth years of young people significantly. and its not the end of life or growth or whatever #but its still sad and isolating and hard

[elizabethospeaks]

Unpopular opinion but I think that we, as artists, writers etc, should make a concerted effort to support one another. Whilst social media numbers aren't supposed to be the focus of why we create art, there's no denying that it does matter to a lot of us, and it does affect our motivation to keep creating.

Whilst I understand The Misery around poor like-reblog ratios and feeling the need to make posts about it, if we don't make an effort to support each other by sharing the work of others, we're part of the problem

#Betho Speaks #idk taking part in artfight this year has made me super nostalgic for The Days we had good communities online for artists #maybe its just me but i struggle to get that sense of Artistic Community on social media and its very isolating and demotivating #and not just reblogging the work of established popular artists either. Support learning artists new artists and hobbyists :))))

[krispiecake]

My first dog, my childhood pet, Lupus passed yesterday. He was 16, or 112 in dog years. A very very old man, especially for a dalmatian! He was born to be a family pet, he’s been with us through all 6 of our childhoods and a total of 4 toddlers, plus his own 11 puppies for a few very stressful months. He wasn’t very smart, couldn’t walk on hard wood floor or he would slip like bambi, would drip slobber on the floor if you were making anything in the kitchen, once nearly gave us carbon monoxide poisoning in his quest to get the sunday dinner roast chicken left of the back of the hob (he and our other dog who passed did in fact pick that chicken clean and we had to get fish and chips on the way back from the hospital after blood tests), and ultimately, was the perfect dog.

I remember the way he would climb on the sofa, stepping on me several times before settling down and sitting with me every night I couldn’t sleep. He would always be so excited to greet me when I came back to visit after I moved out. He had happy tail for like two years straight. He never barked or growled or bit even when my sister played dot to dot on him with felt tips in the 5 minutes she spent unsupervised, or when my other sister practically hung off his neck in a somewhat violent hug before she was pried off. He was kind of a wimp and our other dog who passed a couple of years ago was definitely in charge, and once when we tried them in separate beds, she kicked him out into the small one and he just tried to fit with no argument (the middle picture in the top row). He was so sweet and so stupid and he was the perfect dog. I miss him so much already, I miss him and Skylo, our other dalmatian who passed, and honestly I’m a little mad that he decided to die right now bc I have exams and a million other things and its kind of inconvenient but he always was - sometimes, he would just stand in your way until you had to move him yourself bc he had no idea he was in your way.

#its alright hes not in any pain now #but i wish i had a little more time #maybe this sounds a little weird but when I moved out 5yrs ago i think i missed my dogs more than my family? #because I could call my family and talk to all of them and still hang out with them like that #but obviously its not like i could stroke my dogs through a phone screen #and we hung out so much especially once i was out of school and so isolated even from my family #for a while i was basically nocturnal so i would come down at night and spend all night with those two #sometimes one dog on each side with both their heads in my lap #so i would lay down in a sort of s shape and one would sit behind my legs and one against my chest #honestly there were so many nights i really dont think i would have survived if i hadnt been trapped on the sofa by two massive sleeping #dalmatians who refused to be woken up ever #i miss them #it feels so weird to think that i dont have any dogs at home now #we had him for 16years #skylo for 13 #moving out was what was best for me but i only get to go home a few times a year #and i didnt spend enough time with them #i regret that a lot. i wish id taken them out on longer walks and brought treats and snuck them onto the sofa again

[falled-over]

i got a ds as my christmas present a few years back with a copy of animal crossing (which is considered a bad version of the game btw) and something i keep coming back to is these little objectively somewhat pointless interactions like going for a coffee. you just go to the cafe, and buy a cup. you drink it, and you leave. i always say goodbye before i go. im trying to say thanks. i cant really see any practical reason for doing it, it is objectively just a money suck, but i love doing it. at first i thought the little bird who runs it might open up to me but he doesnt seem the type, but i still like him, so i go and visit him. it feels so real. like he remembers me but doesnt like talking about it. its such an incredibly special and intimate feeling. i wonder if other games at the time were able to cultivate this or if it was unique

#ive only really played modern games where everything has a reward. it was so nice to do something so close to reality #im sure there might be some in game reason to do it but i dont know. maybe you get energy or something #i dont really care. i felt like i was forming a connection emotionally. i wish we still valued that in games #its the only thing im really interested in. #if you have any game recommendations for the ds lmk actually. my sister got a 3ds this year #its funny. i wanted a gaming console so bad as a kid. specifically a ds or a wii #and we have them now! and i dont much care about them. and im kind of glad. im glad i was forced to do something else #i do not look down on gaming as a hobby at all but i am glad its a smaller one for me #i would also like to talk about a similar feeling i felt when i played subnautica (which they took off the gamepass before i could finish i #what the fuck man.) #they briefly put the sequel on so obvi i gave it a shot but i feel it was terrible in comparison #something uniquely insane about the first one is the feeling of isolation. the deep fear #you crash land on the planet and immediately all your communication off-planet is cut and it seems everyone perished in the crash #you spend a couple of hours getting situated and then the ships core explodes. a huge shock wave shakes the entire planet #standing on top of my pod and looking out at the mountain-sized wreck was an insane feeling of isolation. you have to experience it. #and then you start picking up signals on your little tablet. other escape pods. the signals from previous missions who came to do research #you travel out. find food. build things. the whole time working towards seeing if you can find the other pods #each one #empty #often containing a log of their last moments. usually eaten by something. you got lucky #you landed in the only area without a massive predator. #you find alien tech. learn about a disease that wiped out the planet. the entire time you are completely alone #its such a unique feeling. no npcs. no story you have to follow if you dont want to. but god is there not much else. you'll get around to i #discovering the alien species is horrifying and amazing #its an incredible game and i think its sense of loneliness is its greatest achievement. being truly alone on an uncaring planet #sitting there and watching the fish swim by #its unmatched. truly #i would actually love game recommendations if you have any. i love games with unique story lines or characters too #im much more into stories than gameplay #which totally goes against what i just said about subnautica in theory but not in practice

[foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland]

Ok ok final thing b4 i go back to what i was doing b4 and not being distracted. But 1 thing i hate abt omori is that like. I cant SAY anything abt it like everyone already KNOWS i cant be like "ogh the symbolism here " BC EVERYONES HEARD OF THE SYMBOLISM THERE likeeee . Its smth i rlly like abt jrwi bc like u basically always have New things to say bc theres accidental foreshadowing allll the time (and also purposeful but tbh most is like smth vaguely said in ep10 which predicts an entire arc or smt) and since its hundreds of hours long, ppl forget things n can be reminded and likeee since its dnd which is so imagination based, theres so much room for interpretation. But w omori its like. I could be like Damn Yea This Rlly IS Like Depression and veryones like Yea. Thats The Point.

#night thoughts #its mostly like. i rlly like how the pace of hs rlly does feel so accurate to what depression n escapism is LIKE #bc like. everythings seems to get sorta slower and longer and more convoluted as time goes on #to the point where being in headspace feels sorta mind numbing #BUT the thing is ik thats just me bc loads of ppl rlly like headspace n ik a lotta ppl have said #that the way the rw is almost more boring than hs and how they couosnt wait to get back to bed is also rlly like fitting #AND THATS TRUE #but for me hs always felt so slow and just. like trekking up a mountain #AND THATS WHAT DEPRESSION N ISOLATION FEEL LIKE #after spending so much time just as Nothing time just kinda stops existing #and the few chances u do go outside n see friends. seems like kickstarting ur brain #n suddenly ur not wallowing in numb lethargy but ur EXISTING #and sometimes it does feel like ud prefer to be in the Slow and Comfortable isolation #until u realise that just huge contrast in urself #idk maybe im tryna make it relate to myself too much #bc i first played it a bit under a year ago when i was in a massive rut and never went outside n never talked to anyone #til one day i decided to go on a walk just. on a whim #and i saw a cat on that walk and like. i see cats round town all the time #but just bein on a walk n feelin the air n seein the cat was the most id felt in months #and idk yea #ANYWAYS back to not being distracted.

[queerbuckleys]

i am feeling so weird about my birthday this year, idk -- like it doesn't feel real. I shouldn't be 24, i am both too old and not old enough. I want it to slow down. i want to skip the pain and get to the happy part.

#maybe its the hanging out with the 30 year olds and my best friend who is a year younger having a bf #but i am quite literally the only single person i know irl #and its so isolating i hate it