#like the shit he said about darker skinned women was fuckin’ gross

[dejwrites]

i hate the social media narrative that “everyone tweeted and posted racist/homophobic/colorist/ableist/etc stuff when we were teenagers/children so it’s weird to bring up people old posts” like not me. did not have no type of monitoring when i had access to the internet and it did not cross my mind to have a twitter account and tweet “dark skinned women look like burnt roaches” or anything vile that slanders and make fun of a marginalized group. i’m calling bullshit, you guys were and still are assholes that think what you post won’t have consequences.

#i’m glad that chef guy everybody talking about is getting put in a pack ! #like the shit he said about darker skinned women was fuckin’ gross

[gala0apples]

Okay, but I want a Am I Blue? AU. 

For those of you that don’t know it, it’s a short story written by Bruce Coville back when having queer content for teenagers was something you had to seek out from librarians who would whisper to you instead of at least one guaranteed character for each show/media. I actually just reread the editor’s note of the collection and it said (in 1994) that ten years ago having a book of queer stories for kids never would have happened, and hopefully ten years from now it’s not needed because queer characters will be everywhere and won’t need their own books. 

The story itself is short, a closeted questioning boy gets three wishes, and one of them is to turn everyone LGBT some shade of blue to normal skin tone based on just how homosexual they are. There’s really no nuance to the story, nor does it talk about any of the ramifications of the 24 hour event. But that’s the kind of shit fandom lives for, fleshing out the details, and that’s where my brain is.

I want to set it around season seven. The Gallagher family wake up and there they are, all tinted. At first they think it was something Frank did, he robbed a bank and somehow exploded dye packs all over them in his effort to clean the money. And then they turn on the news and it all starts making sense.

There’s Ian, deeply blackberry-blueberry blue. No one’s surprised. He’s had sex with women one and a half times his entire life, on threat to measure up with Caleb and that time Lip tried to get his crazy ex to blow him. Nothing pleasant about it, even if he does play up the vaguely misogynistic girls-are-yucky thing.

This when Debbie is still dating Neil, but has completely turned off from him as a sexual/romantic interest. Everyone’s pretty surprised by her being crest toothpaste blue, Ian the most so. We know from canon he’s pretty gatekeeper’y to Debbie, so I have to imagine here he talks a lot of shit about it not counting if you’ve never actually done anything. Not that Frank was worried about his ethical choices at any point, but now he’s self-righteous about pimping Debbie out to a woman dying of cancer “see, I just showed her something about herself, I helped her! None of my kids know the efforts I go to to help them!”

If Debbie is a surprise, Carl is a shock. He’s spring sky blue, plastic Easter egg blue. Carl declares this whole event bullshit, because he never DID anything, they never fucked or sucked or gave handies. Just because they were mutual protectors, just because they had each other’s backs and Carl had never felt that way before about anyone, never that safe, and all he wanted was to give the guy every single thing he wanted and deserved, just because when he got arrested and they were torn apart it devastated him and changed his entire life, doesn’t mean he’s fuckin’ gay like Ian. It takes a bit for the Gallaghers to figure out he’s ranting about Nick, his juvie buddy.

Fiona has a tint of it. Not much, like the blue glint ice gets around sunset walking home from the last train stop. Everyone guesses it’s because she fooled around with Ve some drunken club night. After all, Ve and Svetlana are both as Crest toothpaste blue as Debbie, Svetlana a bit darker lapis lazuli, when they drop in for coffee. That’s not it though. it’s that Fiona thinks about Jimmy-Steve’s partner sometimes, the woman that hit on her and gave her hundred dollar tips. She doesn’t regret not listening to the lies Jimmy-Steve tried to sell her, but maybe she could have gone home once with the good tipper, if she hadn’t been revealed to have an partnership with her ex.

Lip, too, is more blue than anyone would have guessed. He’s so busy constantly falling in love with women with families already built in, that it’s easy to forget one of those families wasn’t just kids, it was a husband too. Theo was easy relief for Lip’s daddy issues. Besides, there’s a canon foursome Lip gets into, in his alcoholic college days, no one can convince me there weren’t other orgies, mixed gender orgies.

Liam is six at the time. While I appreciate his conversation with Fiona a few seasons later where she tries to make him promise not to fuck over girls he loves and he’s like “...I don’t know if I’ll love girls or boys, I can’t promise anything”, I’m also not going to give a shaded sex drive to a six year old.

Frank is tinted too, a bit more than Fiona, a bit less than Lip. No one asks, they all know about the occasional blowjobs for cash, the drug fueled orgies, the several years of dating Sheila, who only offered pegging. The less gross detail they have, the better.

So yeah, I want an Am I Blue? AU. I don’t know what the plot would be, besides the fun of truths being told, slice of life style, Gallagher slice of life where everyone is screaming and drinking and being maladaptively supportive of each other, but I want it.

#shameless #spoilers #fic idea #notfic