#like obviously that's not the only reason people act this way but i think it's a big and often overlooked one

[crimeronan]

Camila horror thoughts. In the horrifically fraught family horrors sense of the term.

What if Vee has specifically warned Camila about Hunter, told her all about what he specifically has done in order to give her a heads up, in a way naturally coloured by the views she has (not unreasonably) built up around Hunter because of all the stuff she's done.

So naturally she's got this wariness of Hunter that does not compute when she sees how genuinely caring he is with Luz even if logically she knows people can act remarkably differently in different contexts and none of it negates all the stuff he did with The Basilisks for Belos. But Camila is still pretty sure that Luz doesn't know, and is terrified that if she knew it might destroy something that she is desperately reliant on, her relationship with Hunter. It probably wouldn't, Luz could probably live with that since well horrible nightmare trauma soulmates and by Luz's standards she's done just as bad in a similar context but Camila and Luz keeping secrets for almost the exact same reason (to protect the people they love from horrors they are too insane to be affected by) appeals to me.

But the problem now arises, Camila's told Luz that she has adopted another kid, and Luz in the spirit of trying her best to reach out does want to see Vee or have her visit with Camila next time she comes or something like that since like, thats a normal thing to do on reconnecting with your estranged mother and finding out you have an adopted sister you've never met.

Vee, bless is not going along with that "don't tell Luz how horrible Hunter is since she is hopelessly codependent on him" bullshit at all. Camila knows that, Vee knows that. Camila knows she cannot ethically or reasonably expect Vee to not spill all of Hunter's darkest secrets to Luz in an attempt to ruin his life since, y'know all the stuff he did to her specifically.

For Vee the nicest most compromise-y thing she can do, is just never meet Luz face to face, and thats only because of her respect for Camila. But there's no way Luz isn't going to to notice or be concerned about this so there's this constant ticking time bomb of "when am i gonna meet Vee' since "oh she's off at college" isn't gonna work forever.

god this is all so good. i've been thinking about it since you sent this ask a few hours ago now. bc like. god. there's So Much....

i think you're 100% right that vee would try to stay out of things. she's like mama respectfully i'm ready to meet her IF i'm allowed to scream a lot of pent-up utterly unhinged bullshit but otherwise i think it's best for me not to be involved.

and camila is SUCH a bad liar. if she tried to say that things were fine with vee, luz would clock that something was wrong immediately. she obviously wouldn't jump to "she's from the isles" when there are so many more obvious conclusions -- maybe vee is jealous of luz for being the first daughter camila loved, maybe she's angry at luz for running away, maybe she's sick of luz monopolizing camila's time now when vee is used to having their mom all to herself....

regardless of what luz thinks is most likely, she's definitely like. Ah. I Am Driving A Wedge Between Them. This Is My Fault. On A Personal Level. Somehow.

and then on camila's end, that's even true to a point.... bc vee is getting increasingly more upset by the idea of protecting luz's feelings. i can absolutely see a very tired vee finally having the stress get to her & snapping, "why do you think she'll CARE?? she isn't going to care. even if she's as nice a person as you think she is, it's not like i'm a human or a witch. i'm nothing. she doesn't know how to care about people like me"

...there is, of course, a delicious and vicious irony in that. like. luz Very Much Does Know how to care about someone who isn't a witch or a human.

Oh God.

and then whenever luz meets vee, when it all finally Does come out.... i feel like it would sort of be worse for vee than anything she'd actually braced for. because luz DOES immediately care, she does act like it matters, she immediately wants to know everything and fix everything and make it all better, she immediately takes on all of the responsibility for everything the empire's ever done, she's so sorry, she didn't know, she would have done something, she can do something now--

--and vee is like well. HE knew. and he sure didn't want to help me!! even though i asked him to!! even though he KNEW WHAT THEY WERE DOING TO ME THE ENTIRE TIME

hunter has wisely remained quiet because he doesn't think he can really defend himself here. and luz has this moment of uncertainty and confusion, and then she looks at hunter's face, and for a second vee thinks that he's just going to straight-up deny it, but he doesn't. and luz seems to understand that it's all true.

and she doesn't look angry. or even betrayed.

and then she's trying to tell vee that hunter was always in danger when they were growing up, that there must have been extenuating circumstances that made rescue impossible, that he would have helped her if he could, that luz KNOWS he would have because he wouldn't just leave vee to suffer for no reason, that's not the kind of person he is,

and hunter is the one to be like luz. stop. she doesn't need to hear that right now. she can hate me. it's fine.

so vee's opinions on luz are like. 1) i hate that you're so nice that i look insane for being angry with you 2) you're a spineless coward who can't hold anyone accountable 3) you've fooled camila into thinking you're some helpless delicate flower by pretending to be sad when you DON'T care 4) if hunter is going to agree with me about anything then i should legally get to shoot him. just like once. i've never touched a gun or had any inclination to do so before today But I Should Get To Shoot Him .

camila's role in mediating this has mainly been to gently steer the conversation into more productive territory when it looks like it might devolve into panic attacks or violence from anyone involved. she's so fucking stressed by trying to keep things from coming to blows that there's like. no Way that she could do a professional-level job of Family Therapy Mediator.

god.

much 2 consider.

#MESSYYYY. #havent reread this but hopefully it is coherent. vibes. #replies #toh #princess luz au #camila noceda #vee noceda #luz noceda #hunter toh #horrible mindscape trauma pals #long post

[butterballinn]

‼️ REPOST IF YOU AGREE ‼️

Important please read all the way if you can!

Southpark has very dark undertones, considering it is an ADULT show, but even so it does not mean you should sexualize minors in art, animation, stories, and more.

I have seen so many artists draw the main 4 (Stan/Kyle/cartman/Kenny) in sexual ways, including art, and writing.

Not only them but other characters in the show Including Butters, Clyde, Tolkien, Craig, tweek, the goths, and even ike!!

All these characters are 12 and younger. ike is 5!

most of the characters do have adult versions who are canon, which is ok to use in explicit art because they are of age.

But a lot of the art I have seen is of them around the ages of 10-12 years, sexualizing minor characters is not ok, INCLUDING in adult shows.

The most I have seen as well is with the shipping, shipping is ok with minor characters as long as you are not sexualizing the idea of having a crush. Being in a relationship especially at their age does not mean they involve themselves in sexual acts.

On my timeline I have seen people writing fan fiction with names like :

" Teen Top Kyle " or " Teen Kyle does...." It's disgusting.

They will write the boys in different obvious sexual undertones with Y/N. This is not ok! Teen or not it's weird, and gross!

MORE REASONS WHY IT'S WRONG IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME ⬇︎

- ageing up a 12 year old to a 18 year old just to sexualize is not ok, if you feel the need to sexualize a character so bad you need to age up the character just to Condemn your actions and make it seem ok, it won't.

- Just because a show that is obviously used for dark jokes, adult humor, rage bait and more does not mean you should do the same. I love South Park as much as the next person, but that does not mean I condemn the things they do in the show, nor would I do the things they do in the show in real life.

- kids will want to be in relationships, gay, straight or not. That does not make it right to sexualize the idea of the child's relationship. It's not ok to sexualize ANY relationship including a minors. Not only that but sexualizing a queer relationship is gross, attraction to gender does NOT equal sex. So sexualizing Tweek and Craig for being gay just makes you a weirdo and also a fujoshi

( a fujoshi is someone who likes the idea of two gay men in a relationship, sometimes to a point of sexualizing the characters based on their attraction to that gender)

‼️ IF YOU THINK SEXUALIZING MINORS IS OK, DO NOT INTERACT WITH ME, IF YOU FOLLOW ME AND SUPPORT ACTIONS LIKE THIS PLEASE UNFOLLOW‼️

#south park #art #digital art #important #stop sexualizing #south #park

[apple-orchards-writings]

so, im a hugeeee pokemon fan, and i couldn't resist giving some LI's full teams, i'm posting them for peer review (and also i have no idea what nicknames they would give their pokemon, so uhhh help ?)

I tried to take pokemon solely from the Galarian pokedex, cause it's the UK equivalent and I thought it'd be fun :

Kylar's team:

Chandelure was a Litwick he found in his house a few days after his parents had "the accident", and it brought him some much needed warmth. The things about Litwicks, is that they leech off of people's life force, but is also said to guide lost children to the spirit world, but Kylar was too stubborn to die, so the Litwick stayed and grew up into his Chandelure.

The Absol he found when he was in middle school, he was fleeing from bullies and ducked into an alleyway, where he found an injured Absol staring intently at him. Absols are seen as doombringers because of their ability to foresee imminent disasters, so this one had been chased off and thrown rocks at, meaning it was in bad shape. Kylar took it home and nursed it back to health, and it has since refused to leave his side.

Decidueye was the offspring of his parents' pokemon, and has been his since the egg hatched, so it's very attached to its master, willing to do everything for him, it was here for the accident and remains highly protective of its master. (also owl motif hehe)

The Alolan Ninetales I have less of a reason for, but it is said to act as a guide to people when they come to its mountain, and I had this idea of Kylar coming up the snowy mountain for some reason, and the Ninetales growing fond of this tiny shivering kid, and just following him and cuddling him until he caught it. (idk i just want good things for Kylar ig sue me)

The shiny Galvantula was for me a result of Kylar trying his hand at breeding Joltiks for fun, and this one being in the first few eggs he finds. He decides to keep it, at first for bragging rights, but he really does take good care of it, so another pokemon is added to his ever growing cuddle pile.

Finally, the Crobat was probably found in the rafters of the mansion as a small Zubat, around the time Kylar only had the Litwick and Rowlet. Kylar, having leftover pokemon food, decides to just feed the little fella, and a good friendship blooms. Crobats are said to be extremely stealthy, and can drain people of their blood, so Kylar has gained himself a convenient way of scaring off rivals.

Whitney's team:

Cinderace probably came up to Whitney when he was a child as a Scorbunny, seeing him play football with his friends and wanting to play too. A fast friendship, I'd say, I think Whitney would have been a super energetic kid, and a Scorbunny is perfect for him.

The shiny Togekiss was probably a Togepi gifted by his uncle, and technically a Togekiss, which usually avoid strife, should never stay in Rapeshire, this one likes Whitney too much to leave, it wants to bring him as much joy as possible.

I mean come on, Obstagoon is THE deliquent pokemon, of course Whitney has one. Maybe gifted to him by one of his gang's members ? I think that'd be cute.

Drednaws are seen as highly aggressive so I'm thinking one might have been rampaging through "Whitney's territory", and he wrestled it into "submission", gaining its respect, not before he gets bit through a little tho. He still has the scar from the incident, and the Drednaw sometimes licks at it in apology, now that its been caught.

Alright so I have the headcanon (or maybe it was canon and I forgot) that Whitney has had a garden since he was a kid, and maybe the Roserade came from there as a little Budew ? As in, it was interested and just started staying around, and Whitney couldn't get rid of it, so he just caught it.

Lastly, Sylveon. Sylveons evolve when they have high enough friendship with their trainer (and a fairy move), and obviously Whitney has been pampering it, but I'm thinking it probably doesn't come out of the ball in public much, it's kind of his secret ? But yeah, it's still very much loved.

Robin's team:

Dubwool was found as a Wooloo by the PC when they were going around the moors, it probably escaped from a farm and PC just brought it back for Robin to take care of as a gift. Its wool is said to be bouncy, but I think it can also be a way for Robin to ground themselves if they ever panic, as in they can bury their face in the wool and just shut the world out, I think that'd be sweet.

Goodra has been with Robin since it was a little Goomy, which are considered the weakest dragon type (the pokedex says it not me). Goomys are very good at detecting danger, and can hide very easily, so, sensing little Robin's good intentions, it probably helped hide him from Bailey. Apparently, Goodras give amazing good hugs, even if they do cover their trainer in slime, but I don't think Robin would mind.

Quagsire, similarly knew Robin as a Wooper. Woopers, when walking on land to find food, develop a toxic membrane on their bodies, but this one couldn't quite manage it, and was attacked by predators when Robin was passing through. Robin chased off the predators and gave the Wooper some fruits to help it recuperate, and its been attached to them ever since. Quagsires are very carefree pokemon, and they make great pillows. Basically I'm just giving Robin a perfect team for a cuddle nest.

Victini is the only legendary on this list, and I felt it was only right to give Robin the ever cheerful Victory Pokemon. Victini probably found Robin either after they were taken to the docks, or if that hasn't happened, after they confess to PC. Robin keeps Victini secret at all costs, as it would be hunted for its ability. Having Victini around probably helps Robin regain some self-esteem, and they make a great duo.

Boltund is a dog Robin found in the park one winter day as they were selling hot chocolate, a poor cold mutt with no identifiable traits proving it was owned. Robin secretly took it home and made the split second decision to keep it, now they've got a very excitable dog that's unflinchingly loyal. Boltund acts a sort of guard dog as well, reassuring Robin when they're walking past the docks.

Whimsicott had infiltrated the orphanage, and pulled a prank on Bailey, as Whimsicotts are wont to do, covering his office in its excess cotton. Bailey was furious and looking everywhere for the mischief maker, but the little ball of trouble had hidden itself in Robin's room, and the latter decided to keep it out of trouble and continue hiding it. Ever since then it's felt indebted and stays with Robin. It also quite likes to play pranks on Bailey, and that brings a smile to Robin, so why not continue to do it?

Sydney's team

Inteleon was actually gifted to Sydney as a Sobble by Sirris, reasoning his child should have a partner pokemon, so Sydney is the only one of this list with an actual starter pokemon (in the sense that he was supposed to go on a pokemon journey but ultimately stayed home). Inteleon loves its trainer very much, even if it has to force them to take breaks every now and then. A laid back pokemon and a hardworking trainer is a good duo, they influence each other a lot.

Audino was actually the temple's pokemon at first, acting as an aide to the temple's nurse, but it liked Sydney a lot and always fussed over them much more than any other initiate, so the temple relented and allowed Sydney to keep the Audino. Audino is actually the first one to pick up on Sydney's crushes, since it can use its feelers to sense its trainer's emotions. It subtly pushes Sydney to confess every time.

Dragapult was a lonely Dreepy haunting the temple's cemetery, having been left behind by its pack, it was letting out little mourning cries, which naturally attracted the curious little Sydney, who started leaving some food out for it, since it was too flighty to be approached at first. A few more weeks of getting it used to their presence, and it let itself be caught and taken care of.

Lilligant to me, was originally Sydney's other parent's pokemon, and acted as a sort of mother to them from the start. Lilligants release a soothing aroma, and I think in a time of mourning, or when Sydney lost Kylar, it would act as an aid and smother Sydney in the fragrance to help him feel better.

Okay so work with me for Volcarona here, because in multiple pokedexes, Volcarona is said to have been revered as a sun deity, and while that isn't the case today anymore, it still is a very significant part of Volcarona's history, so finding one in the woods while on a walk someday and being followed by it to the temple, all the while acolytes and initiates are falling to their knees around you is not the thing Sydney was expecting, but still, Volcarona has chosen them, so might as well roll with it.

Finally, Dedenne was a living in the school library before Sydney found it chewing through books and decided to give it a better home, and now it lives with them. It likes to take care of the books as well, and has become the library's unofficial mascot.

so uhh yeah those were my thoughts, tell me what you think ?

#pokemon dol #kylar the loner #dol kylar #sydney the faithful #sydney the fallen #dol sydney #whitney the bully #dol whitney #robin the orphan #dol robin #apple's writings #cult leader kylar #apple's writing

[jihyoruri]

what’s the timeline for rich girl? if they’re in the first few months after debut it’s easy to understand why they would make mean comments about richgirl!yn since the group was formed rather quickly and the members didn’t have much time to bond but if they already been together for 1/2 years then wtf???? richgirl!yn is super unserious but they live and work together 24/7 it’s impossible they haven’t learned her tells or seen her upset once, bffr even if she doesn’t cry she can’t pretend she’s fine for this long it’s humanly impossible

the girls are so funny thinking richgirl!yn is the most stanned member bc she’s the daughter of some rich dude, we’re living in a eat the rich era people have 0 empathy towards rich people, her being the daughter of a businessman would make people hate her and say she bought her spot in the group no one would be stanning her just bc she’s rich (just like when people found out that the heir to samsung was going to debut and people were already hating that girl)

also like the members thinking she’s were she is today bc of her dad money is so laughable, they are a group they’ve seen her during practice, live performances and heard her feats how can they look at her and don’t realize how extremely talented she is??? (again if they just debuted it’s understandable but if they’ve been together for a while wtffff???) and let’s be serious she an ex sm trainee girly pop was supposed to debut with aespa we all know she sings live and she eats it all the time

does the public know that she was supposed to debut with aespa? is it something they’ve publicly talked about before? you said she’s always at their dorm so people would wonder how they are so close, and we really need a richgirl!yn x aespa collab to see what ot5 would be like and they performing their song together at awards shows would be a dream

I would say it’s placed during this timeline rn and it is very much humanly possible for her to act like she’s okay since it’s been installed in her to act like that since birth, she raised on not showing vulnerability so ofc it would be easy for her to act like she’s okay, she’s been doing it for over a decade. the’ve seen her upset about an ignorant interviewer or some hate comments but it wasn’t to extent that it was taken seriously because it’s yn she’s always fine in their eyes, they’ve never seen her get rlly worked up before because she’s just that good at repressing her emotions.

they think she’s the most stanned because her father is not only just a rich businessman but a businessman that’s loved in korea, he’s a very known person and does “good.” for the people (which he rlly doesn’t but lets not get into that.) which obviously isn’t the reason why yn is the most stanned she’s just rlly loved for her talents and visuals. there is an undertone of envy when it comes to yn and her members and you’ll see it more very soon in the next couple of small things I’ll put out in between the chapters but because of that they immediately resort to her money being the reason for all of her achievements outside the group. they love her but also have some sort of secret animosity over her that never rlly let them build their relationship with yn like they have with each other. (that’s excluding kazuha ofc) like yeah they’ll talk to her but that doesn’t stop their thoughts getting to their head (again excluding kazuha.)

one thing about them it doesn’t matter how talented yn is they can’t help but think she got where she is with her dad’s money and the fact that she was under sm but as soon as her dad started doing business with hybe she got immediately transferred to hybe rlly fuels it for them, they think her dad has to be helping her sometimes and it’s funny because they don’t even think that in a hating way it’s just what makes the most sense to them because for some reason ofc the most privileged in the group is the one who has the most brand deals and popularity but in reality yns dad doesn’t give two shits about her popularity in the industry, he only made her transfer to hybe because he didn’t want to her to work with competition.

and you’re so right she does eat 24/7 but to people if you’re rich that automatically means you can’t be talented.

the public knows that she’s an ex sm trainee because of sm rookies and that she was apart of the lineup for aespa but they don’t know the reason why she left the lineup but they do know how close she is with the girls especially ningning

I will definitely do some yn + aespa stuff if that’s what you guys are into because they’re rlly important to yn she sometimes wishes she fought her dad harder to stay in the lineup

#richgirl!yn

[thegracefulknight]

O!Ciel, Lizzy, and Sterling Silver Roses

One of my favorite extra chapters in Kuro is the Book of Murder side story, where each of the characters turn into characters from fairy tales. My most favorite part there is obviously Ciel and Lizzy's, which represented The Snow Queen (also my favorite fairy tale). It just fits them so much!

So I was rereading this chapter and noticed the panels below:

In the first one, we see Ciel seemingly giving someone a rose. At the present, we haven't seen any scene similar to this between O!Ciel and Lizzy, but since this is Lizzy's POV and she is talking about the protagonist, I'm assuming this is indeed a memory shared between them (or at least parallel of actual events that happened in their past).

O!Ciel's favorite flower, is coincidentally, sterling silver roses, as mentioned by Sebastian in Ch. 1.

Sterling silver roses are these lovely lavender or lilac-silver roses that represent nobility, elegance, and regality. Since I wanted to see if there would be any relation I could make between this flower and my favorite ship (the way I overthink about these two, really 😭 lol), I tried to look more into what these types of roses represent in a romantic sense.

And well— lavender-colored roses like the sterling silver rose represent love at first sight. They also "signify enchantment, adoration, wonder, and fascination. If you have a secret love, lavender roses can maintain a sense of mystery. The tone is also ideal for the first time you give your love interest flowers."

Giving lilac roses to your special someone, on the other hand, symbolizes your "subtle intentions for them in the future."

Going along with these concepts, and since we were never told of the reason yet why this type of rose was our earl's favorite, my assumption is that the silver sterling rose probably holds a special memory for him in the past. And as the only time we see him with a rose in the manga so far would be that panel from the special chapter (correct me if I'm wrong though), it could be assumed that this memory is something he shares with Lizzy from when they were little—O!Ciel giving her a sterling silver rose. It could be a hint that O!Ciel has liked our sweet Lizzy from the start, and possibly, has wished before that it was he would be betrothed to her instead of R!Ciel (who doesn't really seem that interested in her anyway, he's just happy and relieved she at least is cute and 'not scary'). He doesn't act on it however, as he knows she is never meant to be his.

One thing to note is that, while we have seen from his actions many times that he cares a lot about Lizzy, we are still yet to see O!Ciel actually talk about his true feelings for her. And I believe it's about time l we see just how he thinks of her, from his own POV. I expect that this is something we will finally get to see soon in this arc as one of the layers it touches are the conflicts between O!Ciel and Lizzy, and their relationship.

It's been shown at an earlier part of this arc that O!Ciel distances himself from people he cares about to protect them, and that he is afraid to accept the idea that he deserves love and happiness. I think bringing up this memory with her, and his sterling silver roses would be an emotional way for him to finally face these feelings, and give it a name. To acknowledge that Lizzy is someone that he loves, ever since, and someone he doesn't want to lose.

All of this for now are just my assumptions on what we may see once we finally get the focus back to O!Ciel and Lizzy, but it would be truly interesting to see it unfold, and also a beautiful way to see them acknowledge their feelings for each other when the time comes.

#kuroshitsuji #black butler #ciel phantomhive #elizabeth midford #cielizzy #o!ciel #ciel x elizabeth #ciel x lizzy #lizzy x ciel #this also had me thinking of writing a fanfic about them involving sterling silver roses but when will i even have the time aaa #so yes i tried to write something lol #our!ciel #black butler lizzy #lizzy midford #black butler ciel

[dr-futbol-blog]

The Defiant One, Pt. 2

They contact Atlantis. The fact that Sheppard and McKay are suddenly on the same page, suddenly of one mind, is underlined by the fact that they keep using the pronoun "we". Just a moment ago, they both were using the passive voice and "I" and "you", and suddenly it's "we". It's a noticeable, tangible change. And other characters notice it too.

"We figure the Ancient satellite shot the Wraith ship down in the final battle for Atlantis."

"The wealth of scientific and military knowledge we could acquire is invaluable."

"We have to go down and take a look."

"All the more reason we should have a look. We're already here."

I want to highlight the fact that they are both doing this, and they are taking turns doing it. They are speaking with one voice and one mind, here. And not only that, but Weir is treating them the same. As an item. She definitely noticed something going on between them in the previous episode, first in Rodney's lab watching them get just a little too excited, get a little bit too close to each other discussing... theories, and then definitely during the siege, watching McKay, hearing Sheppard. There, she wasn't a barrier between them, she was their go-between.

And they are not just using words to communicate. The whole call to Atlantis, they are talking to the city but they are having a conversation with each other using facial expressions, exchanging looks, nodding at each other, moving their bodies. It's a whole conversation that's happening outside of the words used.

I mentioned in connection with Home (S01E08) that we see several times that Rodney has managed to talk Sheppard into doing something he might not have originally intended or wanted to do. Usually, we only see the result, we see them on some mission on a random planet or station that McKay wanted to check out. Here, we actually see him do it:

He mouths the words "Help me!" to Sheppard. That's all Sheppard needs. He does it... automatically, like he doesn't even think about it, it's just his natural response. Sheppard looks helpless, like he would probably do anything for this man if he thought to ask (and, um, in the second season we see how far Rodney can push that, but let's get to that later).

The "our interest is purely professional" is not only extremely suggestive. He's obviously referring to the planet and the distress call, but he could just as well be saying that about himself and Sheppard in general and he would be lying. But also, he's speaking for the both of them here. He is. speaking. for the both. of them.

They both also look really miffed when Dr. Gaul tries to get in the way of their budding adventure, and the poor guy really did end up paying the ultimate price just for having been in the vicinity of fire and powder, which as they kiss consume.

It should also be pointed out that while McKay is clearly doing the instigating, Sheppard is the one who goes so far as to lie to Elizabeth. That is, he goes above and beyond for McKay. Also, Elizabeth clearly did not believe for one second that their interest was purely professional, whether regarding the planet or their interpersonal relationship. She has clearly given up trying to reign them in.

Once they're on the planet, we see McKay apply a chapstick to his lips and act like a real bitchy queen toward Dr. Gaul (and as he stands with his hands folded across his chest behind the title card, we're not left wondering who the 'Defiant One' of the episode is supposed to be; McKay is the defiant one in that he refuses to go by Sheppard's plan to keep him at arm's length). They start bickering, with very little gusto. Sheppard interjects with: "Alright, knock it off, guys. I've spent the last fifteen hours listening to you two."

First of all, Dr. Abrams might have a whole different characterization of what the past fifteen hours in the jumper had been like:

Second, Sheppard is both jealous of people Rodney gives attention to and uses projection as a psychological self-defense mechanism pretty much constantly.

There's a scene in First Strike (S03E20), where Sheppard seeks McKay out for no other purpose than to spend time with him (he was just out discussing comics with Ronan and Teyla, being completely useless) and he walks in on McKay and Zelenka arguing. He quips with "Why don't you guys just make out and get it over with?" (which just tells us that he a) wanted to make out with Rodney or b) had done so in the past, but we'll circle back to that later and c) he thinks that the best and possibly the only way to get McKay to stop bickering is to make out with him).

He wants to be the one bickering with Rodney. He does not like it when he gives that much attention to someone else, no sir. By what we saw of their interaction earlier, it doesn't seem like McKay had been talking to Dr. Gaul very much if at all on the jumper, having been engaged in learning how to steer it and focusing on trying to trying to find that straight line.

Sheppard manages to do two things, here: he stakes a claim on Rodney and he attempts to reclaim some modicum of distance between them because back in the jumper, he had just completely forgotten why he had started doing that in the first place. Now, in his fatigues and with his hand on his weapon, he remembers again.

He cloaks the jumper and tells the others to remember where they "parked it". It's a very fatherly thing to do. Like they're a family on a vacation. But are we to understand him as a dad with three toddlers he has to watch out for, or..?

The other scientists certainly act like toddlers. They're basically doing the "Are we there yet?" routine, wondering why they had to park so far. They have clearly never been out on a mission before, so Sheppard explains mission protocol to them; that there's a reason that he does things the way he does. By this time, McKay already understand this. Sure, he also whines about having to walk such a long way, but it's more to connect with Sheppard and to show the others that the two of them are on the same team: "Don't worry, Brendan. We weren't all built for fieldwork. Seriously, we're almost there, right?"

Yes, he's kind of tired because he isn't built for fieldwork (and Sheppard knew this perfectly well when he chose him for his team; and we have seen McKay try to learn how to work on the field). But he's also kidding, again trying to get close to Sheppard by pointing out that he has a special connection to the Major where Sheppard tries to keep a distance (emotionally, but he's also walking real close to Sheppard).

They happen across the planet's indigenous life, the shiny space bugs (and tell me Rodney's first instinct here isn't to grab Sheppard's arm), and have the following exchange:

McKay: Oh, what's that? Gaul: Is it a bug? Sheppard: A space bug. Abrams: It's giving off a pretty strong life-signs reading. McKay: OK, did I mention how allergic I was to bee stings? Sheppard: Maybe he smells the food. Gaul: Maybe he's just smelling the girlish fear.

Dude. Dude.

What Dr. Gaul says is not just offensive but a really stupid thing to say on an alien planet in a whole other galaxy. You have no idea what that thing is or what it's capable of. Dr. Gaul clearly never left the lab before. Not only is Rodney McKay braver than he could ever fathom, this man was just afraid of knowing the jumper was moving. Of motion.

Note also that where previously we have seen Sheppard exhibiting many classic signs of attraction, here we get one from McKay: wanting to share personal things, personal information. Over the seasons, we learn mostly through Sheppard bringing these factoids up that he has done this quite a lot. In Spoils of War (S04E12), we witness how Sheppard has both received and retained a lot of this kind of personal information about McKay (remembering details pertaining to someone? Also a sign of attraction), how he feels comfortable sharing what amount to rather embarrassing stories with the Major:

McKay: Don't worry, I've got an excellent sense of direction. Sheppard: Didn't you say you got lost in a garden maze once? McKay: I was ten. Plus, I was running from a bee.

This is really rather important, because this is juxtaposed to what takes place between McKay and Keller in Brain Storm (S05E16), when we are to understand that their relationship is starting to bud. McKay tells Keller: "When I was ten I ate a bowlful of strawberries and threw up. Haven't been able to stomach them since." We are explicitly shown that this is something he does when he is intending to bond with someone romantically. We've seen McKay overshare things about his childhood, as with Sam Carter in SG-1, with him literally telling us that he's doing it to bond with her. Only, he does this with Sheppard a lot. And unlike other characters, Sheppard not only remembers these things later but also returns to them, brings them up again and again to reinforce the bond between them.

It's really quite beautiful how here, Sheppard not only doesn't react to Dr. Gaul's words at all (which probably had the intended purpose of masculine bonding with the Major by picking on Rodney), but he actually soothes McKay's concern. Twice. First, he suggests that the bugs aren't out to get them but just smell the food, and then he uses a really gentle voice, smiles at Rodney and (seemingly punning) says "Well, let's leave it be(e) and it'll leave us be."

Not only is he not ridiculing McKay, he's showing that he's genuinely there for him, both against the space bugs and ignorant lab-rats who clearly don't realize what a hero Rodney really is for him (or what fear is. He knows what fear is).

(Also, returning to Hide and Seek, S01E03, where Sheppard himself calls fear unmanly; we later learn that that's his father talking; the part of his father he has internalized and that Rodney has actually unwittingly helped him combat from the start by showing him that fear and bravery aren't mutually exclusive).

Sheppard and McKay are a team. We see it later in the episode, but already here: they make each other stronger, and help each other overcome their weaknesses.

And Sheppard was never going to join in on mocking McKay.

In the jumper, it was he that actually sought out Rodney to mock Dr. Gaul and his unsuitability for fieldwork, reinforcing the bond between them. And I have to emphasize again how gentle he sounds here. He cares about Rodney and has no reason to pretend otherwise here because he neither cares nor values the opinion of these people. If anything, being able to stand strong for Rodney (for a change!) just makes him feel a sense of pride, being able to be useful to him brings him closer to Rodney.

Continued in Pt. 3

#stargate atlantis #sga #sga meta #john sheppard #sheppard is bi #rodney mckay #rodney is gay #ep. the defiant one #ep. first strike #ep. hide and seek #ep. home

[sonknuxadow]

it's so wild to me that people talk like sonic and knuckles just now started acting gay in frontiers or that the sonknux ship only exists because of frontiers theyve been gay this whole TIME you just refused to admit it until now

#where were you when knuckles was caught staring at the moon thinking about sonic HMMMMM #ok actually. and id like to preface what im about to say with the fact that #while my feelings on it and the way the fandom acts about it are complicated i DO like sonadow #and im not trying to argue over which ship is better here thats not the point im trying to make #but anyways now that im thinking about it i think people only acknowledging how gay sonic and knuckles are in 2022 #has something to do with shadow not being in frontiers #because. its a fact that sonic and shadow are like the default gay pairing for sonic and they tend to overshadow sonic and knuckles #moments between sonic and shadow always get a much bigger reaction than ones between sonic and knuckles #and a lot of the other media with sonknux moments also had shadow in them #so no matter how gay sonic and knuckles are people Always choose to focus on sonic and shadow instead #sonic could do the exact same things with both of them and people would only care when its shadow #i know because its happened before #people also tend to take certain themes and dynamics from sonic and knuckles relationship and apply them to sonic and shadow instead #even if it doesnt make sense and theyre just making stuff up #or they make shadow act like knuckles to make the dynamic appeal to them more instead of just. liking sonknux instead #sometimes people even go as far as taking onscreen moments that are obviously about sonic and knuckles #and try to make them about sonic and shadow instead (example: the i love captains scene in sonic prime) #sonic and knuckles still go ignored even if whatever media that's being talked about has sonic interact with knuckles MORE than shadow #and none of sonics interactions with shadow could reasonably be interpreted in a romantic way #(again like season 1 of sonic prime . there were like 500 sonadow posts when they barely even interacted) #basically where im going with this is that shadow not being in frontiers #possibly forced people to actually think about sonic and knuckles because shadow wasnt there to distract them #AGAIN not trying to argue about which pairing is better this is just a pattern of behavior i have noticed

[rowenabean]

.

#just saw a post that was like 'if you have religious or moral objections that stop you from providing certain types of medical care maybe #you shouldn't work in healthcare' (paraphrased) and... #what a way to look at the world tbh #like. they're talking about me i think - i am a conscientious objector when it comes to euthanasia #(which granted has come up exactly twice and both cases in a theoretical capacity only this is not a frequent request to me) #and... i am also a good doctor #last week i told someone that her weight doesn't matter to her health with receipts to prove it and she cried #no one had ever told her that before #and that was something that came from me specifically. that was something i would not trust all of the GPs in my practice - a practice of #excellent and compassionate GPs! - to say #i am verifiably doing good in my job that is coming from specifically who i am as a person #i cannot put that down when it comes to issues i care deeply about #fundamentally the fact that i cannot put it down is what makes me a good doctor #i think that's what i'm trying to get at #the reason that i do well by my patients is that i practice out of my values and my ethics #if i did not stand on that core i would not stand at all #so you can't have it both ways. you can't have engaged and active and compassionate healthcare providers without sometimes those engaged an #active providers having things they do not feel comfortable doing #and it is to everyone's service if they are up front about it and do not try to hide (i am suspicious of people who try to hide this) #i am literally figuring this all out as i type hence the v long tag ramble and also being nowhere near the post that started this train #(honestly in med school we talked so much about ethics as like. abortion! euthanasia! trans rights! and the ethics in practice is the littl #things. do you apologise when you mess up. how do you manage a consult with your patient with paranoid dementia and her child in the same #room at one time - or one by one bc that's fraught too. (that one's on top i had one of those today.) how do you act with grace when #you're a bit stressed and your patient is a bit stressed and the nurse wants to add five more things to your book. the day to day ethics is #SUCH a bigger thing when you come to actual practice.) #this is obviously entirely about me and leans on the fact that i largely do think i am doing a good job i am really feeling my own way #to a Thought. but i think to a certain extent it is generalisable

[rez-urrection]

hey a post about transmisogyny !! I sure hope the poster doesn't deliberately say trans and cis men can not be the victim of genital sexualization, sexual or verbal harrasment, fetishization or violence !

*reads*

oh :(

#guys you can talk about transmisogeny without saying trans men arent over sexualized #we are. acknowledging transmisogeny or any type of transphobia for that matter should never include denial of another trans person's - #experience with transphobia. #if at any point your argument goes into “well this doesnt happen to x group” stop #and think ! #“does this not happen at all #or have i just never seen it?“ #“have i done enough research on this topic to say without reasonable doubt that this does not happen to x group #and only happens to y group?“ #“have i talked to members of x group about their experience with this issue to verify if its something that does or does not happen?” #if at any point your answers are lackluster #stop ! #and do your research ! talk to people apart of these communities which you are saying do not suffer ! #obviously this isnt saying transmisogeny isnt real #but if your only way to talk about transmisogeny is to put down other trans people and act like they do not experience any transphobia or #sexualization/fetishization of their bodies #then i hate to break it to you #but not only are you not an ally to trans women #you are not an ally to any trans person #divided we collapse. do not act like other trans people do not suffer. #also #because i forgot to add this on any of the other tags #stop acting like cis men cant be sexualized either #its extremely isolating and upsetting as a trans person to read post after post about how trans men dont suffer at all and nonbinary people #dont suffer enough and how trans men and nonbinary people arent sexualized at all #you forget the entire world sees us as ditzy confused girls that need fixing or amab nonbinary people as just boy lite #in conclusion #trans women can suffer at the same time and for similar reasons as trans men #and it will still be important #there is zero reason to say trans men do not suffer to annunciate an issue in transmisogyny

[caffeinatedopossum]

I think many people who refer to intrusive thoughts incorrectly as being like "oo I dyed my hair! My intrusive thoughts won today teehee" are actually thinking of *impulsive thoughts* which, while not always normal, are still distinct from intrusive thoughts

#i think of impulsive thoughts as being much more action leaning #like when you have an impulsive thought youre more likely to act quickly and think on it less #perhaps even regretting it later #and obviously this can be dangerous and harmful too just in a different way #and the only reason i make this distinction is because people with intrusive thoughts dont want to act on them #often they will think about it for hours because of how distressing the mere concept of them maybe wanting to act on it is to them #intrusive thoughts dont 'win'. you either obsess over them or forget about about them. theres no winning it just is #anyway maybe this is pedantic and seems unimportant #but as someone with often very distressing and obsessive intrusive thoughts #i can say that nothing scares me more than the idea that those thoughts will 'win' #impulsive thoughts also come from a place of desire/actually wanting to act on the thing at least a little bit #even if you havent stopped to consider that it might be a bad idea or you might regret it #its like if you think 'i want to eat a second piece of cake' and then you do even though you know this will give you a stomach ache #versus thinking 'what if i ate thumbtacks' and then being very worried that theres something wrong with you #you probably didnt *want* to eat thumbtacks. it was just a passing thought that couldn't be dismissed #i hope this makes sense at least a little bit and im not invalidating of confusing anyone

[hannibalismos-jaaneman]

is it just the cogs of my brain whirring wildly or was bedelia kinda sorta in love with hannibal too?

#raj shitposting #i mean there must be a more concrete reason than just purely the fact that she got to live with hannibal that will hates her so much right? #idk sometimes it seems like she deliberately does what hannibal tells her to and deliberately lies to save him some amount of trouble. #her accompanying him rather than just killing him on the spot in antipasto is tantamount to her being acquiescent. #or as she put it for will... cooperative. her choosing to spare him in that moment was not wisdom it was foolishness. #and we've only seen two people being that foolish besides her. alana and will. jack was ignorant for a long time but he came to his senses. #and to be honest alana only got the threat of death because she dared to take away hannibal's dignity. ONLY because she was rude to him. #she really didn't have to “obfuscate” for him. she could have simply told jack that hannibal was fucked up when he asked her the first time #i think i realised that bedelia probably had some latent feelings about hannibal when will asked her why she lied for hannibal so much. #it was because of will that i realised that she perhaps along the way lost a “professional” perspective towards her relationship with him. #they were obviously friends before that but when she corrected hannibal once by telling him that they were not friends but colleagues... #my brain had already started working up on that she was trying not to fall for him and maybe that was the only way she thought she wouldn't #but she did anyway. and maybe that's the reason why will hates her. i mean he would know if she were in love with hannibal right? #it sometimes does feel like she wants to save him. she was kinda salty that will let hannibal surrender like that in their sessions. #i mean she was probably jealous of will which was why she was such an asshole to him. i don't find any other reason for her to act that way #i mean she is a psychiatrist you wouldn't expect her to lose her shit like that at someone. but she does. that too at will. like- #-it's too much of a coincidence to let it go. she could have ratted hannibal out any time but she doesn't. even though she had leverage. #i'm thinking too much about this man... sighs anyway #bedelia du maurier #miss will graham #hannibal #hannigram

[sushisocks]

i wish i was as good as you in being feral in tags. i truly try, but it just doesn't come. you, on the other hand, make growling and barking in the notes seem so effortless, i'm in awe

HELLPP IM FUCKING CRYING THIS MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD

the fact that this could have been spurred by SO many posts ive reblogged the past 24 hrs. or like, ever 😭

but see

that's my secret, lissu

im always feral (lol)

and i just live in the tags so that's where it comes out more often than not LMAOO thank u for the compliment im glad my brand of mental illness is enjoyable HAHAHAH

#HAR DE HAR MARVEL REFERENCE sorry i couldnt help myself but ITS TRUE #the way i am in the tags is LITERALLY JUST HOW I ACT ALL THE TIME ONLINE THATS JUST WHAT IM LIKE #also being like very autistic and severely mentally ill and having very little dignity to speak of on this platform helps #AND i convinced myself like years ago that i can say whatever in the tags and maybe 2 other people will see it. this is my safe space #(obviously i know thats not true theres too many ppl here 4 only 2 a time to see me b crazy in the tags but we dont need to talk abt that) #also also if youre wondering how i think of the words i say in the tags. the answer is i dont!! #thank u again bcz i am STILL laughing over this #i went and looked bcz i was like 'what the fuck did i say in the tags that couldve spurred this ask' #now I scrolled like back a days worth but i really didnt need to. i definitely see your point LMAOO #DONT ASK ME ABOUT THAT JOSH HUTCHERSON POST I WILL NOT STAND RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT TEKI OF YESTERDAY SAID #NOR THAT ARTHUR MORGAN ART THAT WAS A VERY REASONABLE RESPONSE IMHO #ALSO NOT THAT WOLFSTAR ART THAT WAS ABSOLUTELY WITHIN THE PARAMATERS FOR THAT POST!!!!! #jesus christ. im doing it again #im--- #teki talks #asks

[magikant]

the idea that thinking alignment is a bad game mechanic = “not being able to handle conversations about morality” is a fucking wild take

#i dont hate alignment #but i do think trying to apply it to anything besides dnd #is doomed to fail #because the only reason it makes any sense in dnd is as a basis for a fantasy cosmology #and at the end of the day it doesnt do a very good job at that #because while functioning as the base understanding of reality within this universe #it also fails to acknowledge itself as a humano/euro-centric realization of morality #the centerpoint of alignment is not flexible or considered in relation to different cultures #alignment (as conceived) says bad is XYZ and good is getting rid of XYZ #ABC races do XYZ so are bad #you are therefore only good if you oppose ABC #alignment does not ask 'what does goodness or lawfulness look like in a goblin society?' #it says 'goblins are chaotic evil. if you are good you are obliged to kill goblins' #obviously you dont have to play your game that way #and there has been enough pushback against that mindset that the text is finally starting to reflect a new attitude #but it still remains the core of the concept #honestly i dont think there is any choice wotc could make moving into 5.5 regarding alignment that i would be totally happy with #leaving it as is or getting rid of it both feel like bad options #changing the way it is implemented is the obvious answer but there is no way to do that that will make everyone happy (duh) #anyway just bugs when people act like their (probably better) more socially conscious definitions of alignments are like #them /figuring out/ the real meaning of it and what they are supposed to be #rather than admitting this is how they like to homebrew alignment to better fit with their own sense of ethics #that is not really what the people i am responding to in this moment were doing #but something i see often enough

[fingertipsmp3]

I really do think I need to work on the fact that whenever I don’t get enough sleep and/or am prematurely awoken by something I act like a fucking banshee

#it’s the real reason i can never have kids. sleep deprivation turns me into those screaming women in midsommar #my mom used to send the family dog to wake me up for school because she knew i’d never yell at him #literally animals are the only exception to this i have found. i have never been mad at kim OR mabel for waking me #(or cali when she slept on my bed sometimes and would prod me to make sure i was still alive #OR boris when he’d run on his wheel at 3am <3) #oh i do want to harm the seagulls when THEY wake me up. but i don’t do it obviously #i’m just ridiculously cranky and emotional when i’m tired. it’s like the floodgates open #i just cease to care what i say or do anymore it’s very bad #me and my friend were comparing our sleep times for last night according to fitbit and mine was 8hrs 5mins #hers was ONE HOUR AND SIXTEEN MINUTES i was like.. how did you even make it here #i would’ve gotten in a fistfight with a grown man on the way. or had to stay home and cry in my kitchen #i’m at a point i think the people in my life warn each other if i slept bad because i’m not going to be acting normal #i’m either manic or PISSED OFF or crying #it’s upsetting. i should work on it! #OR make sure i sleep great all the time and the problem never comes up. 🧐 #personal #*just remembered a kinda funny example of me acting crazy when something woke me up #i’d just gotten to sleep and my flatmate got in and immediately started blasting mariah carey #(it was like 2am mind you) #i crashed out of my bedroom; down the stairs and started hammering on his door #he went ‘yeah?’ all casual and i yelled ‘I HAVE CLASS IN THE MORNING TURN THAT DOWN’ he said ‘oh shit sorry’ #what was funny about this was that our other flatmate who lived in the basement apparently couldn’t hear the music #but he heard me hammering on the door and screeching #not sure how to feel about that

[mxdotpng]

the soremik in my head is so vastly different from anyone elses idea of them that i fear if i ever speak out on the subject i'll have rocks thrown at me. but once again they are allowed to look but never touch. you have to expect this from me by now.

#.text #its for an actual reason this time outside of general preference though! #to sorey the best time to have told mikleo he loves him was before he met alisha. and then after. well. thats his secret now #i near constantly think about how sorey views his duty as shepherd. it is not just a title -- it is like chains. #he knows he is going to die some day. and its clear that after he becomes shepherd he knows its going to be soon. #i think a lot of the optimism sorey has is true. to an extent -- he believes the things he says to others. #but he knows some of them are lies. #its a kind of 'if i say it enough times and if i try hard enough then i can will it to be true' kind of mentality #which more often than not writes him off as naive and ignorant. and in some cases that is true. but in others he is often right. which is #why that optimism sounds like pure optimism rather than him trying to force things to turn out well #which is in turn connects to how he knows being the shepherd isnt something that comes without cost. it isnt just the weight that hurts him #and you know he knows this because the realization that he must become maotelus' vessel is not one that comes suddenly #to him. it has always been there. he knew this was going to happen. he does not fear it -- not entirely. it isnt the act of #sleeping or dying that scares him. its what comes after. but not for him. for the people around him. #he is never scared for what may happen to him. only of what may happen to others and how it affects them. #honestly the fact that this mentality came naturally to him is so startling... it came out of nowhere. only was this born #from the way that he loves and protects others. nothing else. #which turns right back around to mikleo. the shepherd is chained down by fate. he will not do the same to mikleo #i think he would do it because he believes hes protecting mikleo of the heart break. because more than anything sorey wants him #to live. after hes gone he wants mikleo to live. and i genuinely cannot think of their relationship as otherwise #because i know full well that the moment mikleo and sorey found out that sorey is human and he is going to die. it changed everything #even if it changed nothing it changed everything. #im going to love you for all of my life and youre going to miss me for the rest of yours. type of relationship. #not to mention sorey has this really large savior complex -- he knows he is hurting himself by doing this (by doing everything #really. the first thing that comes to mind is allowing alisha to become his sublord. if he dies because of their pact #but saves at least one life because of it. then so be it) #but is saving mikleo. which obviously isnt the case. thats never been the case. #but that is how it is and how it must always be. #sorry for the sorey essay. it will happen again

[genspiel]

sometimes i read negative reviews of books i enjoyed, just for fun, and i can't get over this one person who read The Stone Sky and said it was confusing because.......... second person is used for multiple characters. like??? no???? it's still just essun

#tre reads #broken earth #the stone sky #nk jemisin #essun #like i understand that this series does some odd things with POV and it can take some time to get used to it #but this particular comment is just. literally incorrect lmao #also the review right under this one says that they only recommend TSS to “people who liked twilight or harry potter” which like...... #i've read neither of those and don't particularly want to #but i loved broken earth so fuck you i guess dhfjskdf... #imagine comparing sci-fantasy that realistically addresses abuse and oppression to... sparkly vampire romance and wizard school #but you do you i guess #like obviously not everybody is gonna enjoy every book and that's fine #and hell even “i don't understand x” is valid. i've dnf'd books for reasons like that before #and sometimes negative reviews genuinely do have good insights that get me to think more deeply about stuff and that's cool #but a lot of the time i feel like people have just. fundamentally misunderstood what the book is going for. and that's frustrating ahaha #i started reading another review and this person is calling nassun a narcissist #like that is an abused oppressed child my guy she 100000% has valid reasons for acting the way she does and “narcissism” isn't part of it #but it's getting me really worked up so i think i'm gonna stop now and go do something else shfjkdsf