#like i understood that birthdays was a good reason to gather family and see eachother after a long time

[straykats]

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#kats personal #man like #i dont want to celebratr my birthday #esp not w family and styff #and yet he ends up planning it #and then i didnt want a cake bc at the bery least then can we just make it a normal dinner #buy he dtill did it #anf yes i told him i dont wsnt either #and its for my brother too but my brother idnt even gonna be home that night #and idk like i just #i dojt feel good again and idk if its bc of that or bc of the course change and uncertainty or bc of both #i just want to sleep #like i understood that birthdays was a good reason to gather family and see eachother after a long time #which i yeah i understabd so i said okay fine whatever just do the dinner then #but the cake too??? the whole celebration aspect??? #girl okay maybe i really dont wanna di this anymore bruh #and why is it that its always me telling jim 'i understand your pov' #i feel like he doesnt even understand or like care for what i think/want #which in a way has become rather evident with this whole course change thing #like yes he wants me to be happy but he still wants me to do what he wants ??? #god frick all this is making my head hurt even more #i feel like im being really selfish #but at the same time #i feel like im always giving in to what he/they want because i just jate the conflict so much #and this course change thing is the first thing that uve really stoof my ground about and fought for #man i just #idk i want everything to just stop right now