#like god. maybe those people need to try not being a condescending bench (to quote Eleanor) and maybe they’ll feel better and be able to ac

[hopecomesbacktolife]

I’m not going to reblog the post itself because I don’t want that behavior on my blog, but oh my god I just saw a post about “looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3” and good lord the amount of bad takes both in that post and in the notes?? I have to just ramble about this for a moment because oh my god. it was ludicrous.

people were complaining that, and get this, unfinished fics exist. and that if you read an unfinished fic you’ll have to, get this, wait to read more until it’s published next. they were allll up in arms that there’s fics for a character that don’t cater to their specific interests. that they involve other characters and either do/don’t put them in a romantic relationship when they want the opposite for the character.

like at this point, most of you people in the notes on that post are 1) just being mean and condescending about FREE WORKS you can, may I remind you, READ FOR FREE and EXIT at ANY time! if you don’t like it!, don’t read it!, it’s so simple!, and 2) straight up do not know how ao3 works lmao

like I saw soooo many people in the notes complaining about a certain ship, dynamic, tag, etc, and like… y’all know you can filter by romantic vs platonic pairings, by ratings, by excluding certain tags or other qualifiers, etc etc etc… you know about ao3’s actually incredibly usable filtering and searching system… right… right??

at this point I’m just convinced a lot of these people are spoiled by large fandoms with 100k+ works for their characters and have decided to just be mean and condescending for no reason on main, about literally free fan works you can read for free any time that people spend hours and hours pouring their free time into out of sheer love for their craft. cuckoo bananas behavior if you ask me 🫠

I was legit so close to commenting that maybe they should try shipping two characters with <10 fics, with 0 fics, try liking a rare pair, try hyperfocusing on a character or niche type of fandom with a tiny but lovely circle of fans, and stop treating fan works and fic as Content TM that they deserve to have handed to them that caters to exactly what they want for free and maybe they’ll calm down lmao

like y’all aren’t cool you’re just being mean. we fundamentally approach fic in wildly different ways and honestly the way you do sounds exhausting. literally could not be me, I’m to busy finding joy in shared love for characters and not flipping the table in a rage because there’s one (1) element of the fic that isn’t specifically catered to me, maybe try that and you’ll feel better, hmm?

and yeah I’m aware that last sentence is me being condescending towards them, but frankly it’s warranted when so many people are being that mean and haughty for no reason lmao but truly those takes were horrific. fellow fic writers and even fellow fic readers I interact with, am mutuals with, authors whose works I read, readers who comment and interact with my works, fans of niche fandom subsets that run in the same circles as me— I hope you know this is so wildly not how I approach fics, I love just finding fics for my characters and forming these lil communities where we share our interests and love for them and hype each other up. I love what we have in these fandom niches and I hope you know I would never dream of being so mean and condescending towards y’all. fic writers and readers and fan communities are so special and I cherish it even if clearly there’s people in the notes on that other post who don’t know how to do that lmao. I love your unfinished WIPs, I love your fics that may only partially be what I’m looking for, I love when you write characters in a way I wouldn’t expect but shows your love for your particular headcanon, I love the variety and diversity and variance in fic. I love us. genuinely. fic writer moots I am hugging all of you and I frequently reread your works, even the unfinished ones. ♡

#personal #god this turned into a rant but sometimes I’m just shocked by how.. mean and condescending and holier-than-thou some people can be about fic #about works people write FOR FREE because they LOVE a character/ dynamic/ etc so much they can’t NOT let that love pour out into a fic tjat #once again you can READ FOR FREE HELLO #like god. maybe those people need to try not being a condescending bench (to quote Eleanor) and maybe they’ll feel better and be able to ac #tually participate in the wonder and joy and delight that is fan communities and fic communities idk man #I’m convinced some of it is people being spoiled by large fandoms and also not knowing how ao3 works at all #but like. this is not a streaming service this is an ARCHIVE it is a LIBRARY do you know how to use a LIBRARY #hello??? if you don’t like a book you can return it and borrow another???? not scribble in the margins about how you don’t like it??? #like literally w h a t. #unhinged behavior and not in a cute way. #being mean isn’t cute it’s just being mean. condescension won’t magically make your dream fic scenarios appear. sorry (not sorry tho) #anyways. there was no way in hellllll! I was going to reblog that post and bring that whole mess to my blog. so instead. making my own post #(somewhat like people who can’t find fic they want could also just make their own but yknow 🤭💋) #anyways fellow fic writers and readers I interact with and am friends with ily ily and pls know I never think of your works like that in a #million years ok ❤️❣️❤️ I’m sorry some people are Mean I’m so glad the people I know who are fic writers + readers aren’t like that ty ty

[dailyaudiobible]

09/09/2019 DAB Transcript

Isaiah 3:1-5:30, 2 Corinthians 11:1-15, Psalms 53:1-6, Proverbs 22:28-29

Today is the 9th day of September. Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I am Brian. It is a pleasure, it is an honor, it is a joy, and it is a calling to be here with you today as we take the next step forward into our week, get things all going and the next step forward in our year and the next step forward in the Scriptures. So, we began the book of Isaiah yesterday and we’re gonna be camping out in Isaiah for a little bit. So, let's take that next step by reading Isaiah chapters 3 through 5 today. And we’re reading from the English Standard Version this week.

Commentary:

Okay, so we are obviously working our way through the letter that we know as second Corinthians, a letter that Paul wrote to the church in Corinth. And, so we’re starting to get an opportunity here to revisit and review and re-see some of the tensions that were happening in the early church. And as we observed while we were navigating through the book of Acts, and then some in the book of Romans, you know, it's really easy to put these rose-colored glasses on and look back at the formation of the church and go, “what a blissful amazing time, tongues of fire are falling from heaven, people are coming to Christ, it's a beautiful time of unity, but that’s actually not story, it’s not even the biblical story. And so many of the things that were challenging early on are the very things that are still challenging us today. So, we get just a little bit of a glimpse of that in today's reading when Paul starts talking about “super apostles”. And he’s not talking about super apostles like, you know, these are the Avengers for Jesus, like their superheroes. He was using that term in a negative way, kind of condescending way. And scholars have been debating about who these super apostles are for a very, very long time, but probably this is the deal. People who probably came out of Judaism who were Hebrew people and who understood Jesus as a Hebrew in a Hebrew context, they just were not on board with this kind of nonexclusive thing that was happening in the world where Gentiles, like anyone who calls upon the name of the Lord, like anyone who believes that God raised Jesus from the dead and believes that Jesus was the son of God, like anyone who believes that Jew or Gentile, so anyone could be saved. Very, very different from the way Hebrews had grown up in Judaism. So, as we’ve talked about in the past, these people, even though they had come to Christ and were following Jesus teachings, they would expect anyone else who wanted to do that to convert to Judaism. Like, they were not changing religions. At least that was their understanding. On the other hand, there were those including the apostle Paul who were like, “no…this is very, very inclusive. God is saving the world now. Like has gone from an exclusive chosen people to now through that chosen people God has sent His Son to save all the people.” So, like that's a pretty…pretty big paradigm shift, and we still do indeed struggle today with who gets to be in. So, you can see in the stew that we just kind of made for ourselves, a lot of people thought a lot of different things. So, people who had different convictions about Jesus had started to visit these new churches that were being planted all over the Roman Empire on Paul's missionary journeys and other people's missionary journeys. And Paul had established these churches, right, through great persecution, with a lot of suffering, with incredible marginalization, right? It was a difficult job. He was getting stoned and left for dead. Like, all kinds of things have happened to Paul and he has suffered to plant these churches and then there are people who are going in behind him with different convictions about Jesus. And the way that they were teaching had nuances that Paul's teaching didn't, and it seems as if some of these people were finding traction, like they were being validated because they were associated with people who had actually walked with Jesus during His ministry. And those are probably the “super apostles”. And Paul couldn't claim to be a super apostle. He never met Jesus during like His earthly ministry. While he was on earth in the flesh Paul never met Jesus. So, you know, tough time for Paul to say, “well…I have met the cosmic Christ…I have met the resurrected Christ. He came to me on the road to Damascus. I met him and he told me these things, and this is what I'm teaching.” Tough for Paul to make an argument against the people who were actually the disciples of Jesus Christ walking with him in his earthly ministry. So, like, I mean you think about it. Think about it. Your sitting in church one day or you’re just sitting on a park bench and there are a couple of people trying to share the gospel and one person’s saying, “I know Jesus personally, like walked with Him, I heard His voice. Like, I literally watched Him heal people. I heard what He taught.” And then you have another person who's like, “I also know Jesus. I may know Him even better because He came to me after His resurrection and taught me what He taught me and sent me to who He sent me too.” So, you’re like…you’re sitting there and if that's the decision you gotta make, think about…think about it. So, these people, whoever these people are, are, you know, kind of bringing their allegiance back to the living disciples who are probably leaders in Jerusalem. And even though there was a church council making decisions about Gentiles and Jews, it was a contentious thing. So, anyway, these people are visiting the churches and Paul considered like that…that they were using their association with these, quote unquote, “super apostles” as a way to validate themselves and he looked at that as boastful and self-serving. And, so, he's in this position where he needs to respond, but in order to respond he has to kind of come to their level and start boasting himself, right? Bragging and boasting and like self-validation and drawing attention to yourself, that…that's like not considered a good thing. Like, that's not healthy behavior, but he's like backed into a corner, as if he doesn't have a choice. He didn't want the Corinthians to be confused. He didn’t want them to be swept away into all kinds of nuanced things that…that he wasn't teaching from the beginning. And, so, he was concerned. So, in yesterday's reading and even today's reading, we’re kind of  watching Paul dance around this and squirm around this because like this is like a no-win situation when you have one group of people saying, “while I'm so great because of this”, and then you have another group of people going, “well, I'm even greater than that because of this and this and this and this.” It’s like, you can't be validated by comparison. But the Corinthians are being influenced negatively so…so Paul has to start to talk about how he has struggled to bring the gospel to them in the first place. And this is the boasting that we’re gonna hear for the next little bit. So, I mean, we just talked about this, but what's in it for…like what's in it for us? Like, what can we do with all that? Was Paul just super insecure? I mean, maybe so. Maybe he was. He’s a human being. He's moving forward just like the rest of us are. So, maybe so. But Paul actually said why he was doing what he was doing and why he was going to do this boasting and explain how it was that he was absolutely as valid if not more valid than the “super apostles.” He said, “I am jealous for you with the jealousy of God himself. I promised you as a pure bride to one husband and that's Christ.” So…so as we go forward and into tomorrow, we’ll hear this boasting that Paul's setting up, but even before we start hearing this boasting, we should consider how it is that we are trying to validate ourselves in our faith. Are we legitimate because we can drop names or outmaneuver someone with Bible verses or, you know, win a theological debate or is our validation in the complete knowledge that we are nothing and have nothing to boast in other than Jesus?

Prayer:

father, we invite You into that because it brings up a bunch of stuff. It brings up how it is we attempt to create an identity. And so often this identity is…is created by comparison to other people when we are truly nothing…like there's nothing to compare to. There's nothing outside of You. And, so, come Holy Spirit, and once again remind us of our true identity, that we are Your sons and daughters. Come Holy Spirit we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

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And that's it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

[not-close-to-straight]

Lost Boy (Chapter 2)

MASTERLIST

TW: Drug use

-------------------------------------------

The first time Tony met him inside the library at his usual table, Steve looked him over quickly, checking his eyes and his hands for any trembling or dilation, before finally smiling and sitting down.  Tony just rolled those dark eyes and pulled an equally thick textbook from the shelves and slouched in a seat to read. “Am I going to have to do a pee test before you let me sit with you each time?”

“Are you planning on sitting with me often?” Steve asked, reaching for his glasses and glancing up in time to see Tony’s smirk.

“Oh as often as I can, lawyer man. Not gonna get tired of those baby blues anytime soon.”

Steve smiled and shook his head, trying to concentrate on his reading. But Tony was shifting in his seat, rubbing his hands down his thighs, clicking that tongue ring and Steve couldn’t handle it after a few minutes and finally asked, “Really? ‘Special Relativity and It’s Experimental Foundations’? That’s what you’re reading?”

Tony grinned at finally having gotten Steve’s attention, but then frowned a little. “What, you’ve never re-read a book?”

“Re-read.” Steve pulled his glasses off and rubbed at his eyes. “You’re telling me you’ve already read this.”

“A few times.” Tony flipped a page casually. “My thesis for my masters pulled quite a few ideas from this.”

Steve just stared. “Thesis. You’re twenty.”

“I didn’t say it was finished.” Tony flipped another page. “I went to college at sixteen. Well started college. Tested out of most of the first few years. Got my bachelors basically online. But I’ve slowed down these last several months. Life has kind of…” his voice trailed off, and he leaned back in his chair, balancing a scuffed show on the library table.

His bony knee was showing through his torn black jeans, and the hand not holding the book moved restlessly against his thigh. Steve was having a hard time not staring, watching Tony’s hand, even in those ridiculous black gloves, stroke up and down, over his thigh.

“Honestly? Sixteen?” He dragged himself back to the conversation, kicking himself for letting his mind wander.

“Yeah.”

“So why are you–” Steve flicked a hand over Tony’s outfit.

“What, living with my Aunt, dressing like I’m homeless and hanging out with kids who just get high all the time?”

“Sure. I didn’t know about the Aunt part, but sure.”

“Why not?” Tony shrugged and Steve didn’t have an answer that wouldn’t sound condescending, so he just went back to reading.

Tony did as well, and for a long time the only sound was the turning of pages. “You don’t like how I dress?” He asked quietly and Steve forced himself not to look up.

“No, I like it. I mean, I don’t mind it. Not my usual style but-”

“But you’re willing to walk on the wild side?” Tony’s voice dropped into something low and dark and Steve nearly snapped his pencil.

“Oh my god.” The boy laughed soft and slow. “You are fucking adorable.” ************************ Steve didn’t know when or why it became a ‘thing’, but suddenly Tony was at the library all the time, slouching in his chair and speed reading his way through  different physics textbook every few days.

He started ordering lunch in, after licking his lips and declaring that a big boy like Steve needed to keep his strength up for more fun activities. Steve always paid for the food, and Tony always made a comment about ‘making it up’ in one way or another.

Then he’d laugh quietly when Steve rolled his eyes and go right back to reading. 

Sometimes they would talk through lunch, Tony wanting to hear about law school and the upcoming exam, Steve just wanting to hear Tony talk about his life. He had a way of speaking that made him seem so much bigger than his average size, his voice rising and falling with every sentence, his dark eyes so earnest sometimes that Steve wanted to sit and watch all day.

He learned Tony lived with his Aunt Peggy, and had since he was seventeen. Tony’s mom had died several years before, and his dad wasn’t in the picture.  He had been interested in physics since he was in junior high, and liked to tinker in his garage when he had free time because engines and cars fascinated him.

Steve told him of getting the scholarship to play football, and how he’d never been able to afford college otherwise. How living this far from his family was kind of a relief after so many years in a crowded house in a shitty side of town. How law school had always been a dream of his, and that he had a job waiting for him once he passed the bar, and he couldn’t wait.

Steve was fascinated by Tony, there really was no other way to say it. 

Tony was hilarious in a dry sarcastic way, a change from Steve’s straightforward sense of humour. He was into old rock bands and the detective show genre, quoting from his favorite shows constantly, until Steve started watching them when he got home, just to understand the references. And every time Tony said something funny, he would lean forward in his chair, eyes sparkling, like hearing Steve laugh was the best part of his day. 

Tony never even made a point of being discreet with his glances, in fact he was purposefully obvious, often staring at Steve while clicking his tongue ring, until the blonde blushed and looked away. Or running whatever pen was in his hand over his lips slowly, while glancing up through his dark lashes.

Several times Tony would ask an innocent question, maybe about Steve’s childhood, then yawn and stretch and run his foot up Steve’s leg until the blonde couldn’t ignore it and jumped, stuttering through whatever he was trying to say. He had started texting Steve more often too, sometimes just random observations about people he saw, other times it was in depth reasoning about morality or politics.

And then there were the flirty texts, that made Steve stammer and put his phone down, trying to focus on his reading, but entirely unable to when Tony was saying things like “you should wear less jeans and more fitted slacks. I didn’t take my eyes off your ass once today.”

Finally, after a couple weeks of this… whatever it was, Tony stood to leave, and leaned over the table and cleared his throat, waiting for Steve to look up.

“What’s up Tony?”

“Oh just–” he reached out and stroked his finger over Steve’s jaw, leaning closer and sighing softly before sliding their lips, tongue flicking out to tease against his mouth, then slip inside when Steve opened in surprise.  “Mmm.” Tony made a satisfied noise deep in his throat when he pulled away. “I’ve been trying to seduce you for weeks, and the flirting wasn’t working so I figured I’d try something a little more straightforward.”

“Seduce me?” Steve knew his jaw was hanging open, but couldn’t quite manage to wipe the shocked look from his face. “Is that what you were doing?” 

“Did you really think I sat here all this time to brush up on my physics? I finished my paper weeks ago.” Tony winked at him, and gathered his things nonchalantly.

Steve stared until the boy disappeared out the front door, then reached for his phone when it buzzed.

<From: Tony> –your move pretty boy. ***************** 

Steve shook his head to clear his eyes and gripped the steering wheel harder.  It was three am. Three fucking am and Tony had texted him asking for a ride.  Steve wanted to be pissed, but he couldn’t be. He was mostly glad the kid knew he could text him for help, but another piece of him was excited to see the brunette. He hadn’t seen Tony since that mind blowing kiss the previous day, and thinking about anything else was proving impossible.  So instead of getting mad, Steve just rolled out of bed, threw on some jeans and stumbled out the door.

“There he is.” Steve muttered, rolling to a stop next to a bus bench, where the teenager was sprawled out, head tipped back and eyes closed. “Tony! Hey! Are you alright?”

“Hey. Oh my god you came.” Tony blinked at him slowly, then smiled. “I didn’t think you’d actually–” he stood and nearly fell off the bench, struggling to right himself just long enough to slide into the passenger seat.

“You’re high.” Steve said, stunned at how far gone the kid actually was. “I mean high as hell. Tony what the fuck?”  Tony laughed breathlessly. “I am high!! You’re so smart. You’re gonna pass the bar no problem. So smart. And gorgeous too. Love that blonde.”  He was rambling, barely coherent and Steve sent him an anxious look. “What’d you take?” he turned the car around, heading towards Tony’s place on the other side of town.

“Doesn’t matter.” Tony slurred. “Didn’t take enough of it to OD. Should come down in a few hours. Don’t take me to Auntie’s though. Pretty please, Pretty boy?”

“I have to, Tony. Where else could I take you?” Steve was trying not to shout, trying not to be irritated but he was so angry Tony was doing this again. Especially after finding out how smart the kid was.

Steve had looked him up after that first day at the library and Tony hadn’t been lying. He’d graduated with a bachelors at nineteen, and that was after he’d invented some hybrid fuel system for aircraft that allowed them to double the distance they could fly before needing to refuel.

It could literally change the way the military operated, and commercial planes traveled and Tony had figured it out on paper, patented it, and was pulling in royalties so large the number had made Steve’s head hurt. No wonder he always argued about who was paying for lunch. No wonder he had casually mentioned that engines were fascinating to him.

Steve didn’t understand it. Tony was gorgeous, smarter than anyone else he’d ever known, and rich as hell, and he chose to spend his days hanging out in the library and his nights getting high.

“You’re angry with me.” Tony pouted, biting his bottom lip. “Why are you angry?” 

“I’m furious.” Steve admitted. “I read up on you Tony. You are just…wasting yourself like this, and maybe it shouldn’t piss me off, but it does.”

Tony laughed softly, his head lolling back against the headrest. “Everybody fucking says that. Everyone says I’m wasting myself and that they’re angry about it, as if they have any right to care what I do with my life. But… but do you know the worst thing about being brilliant?”

“Brilliant? Tony you’re a genius. I feel like brilliant isn’t even the right word for you.”

“Okay then.” Tony replied sarcastically. “You know the worst thing about being a genius? My mind never stops. Not ever. I can tell you right now how fast you should be going to get optimal gas mileage from your car. I know that your left foot is the slightest bit bigger than your right, which is why you walk with a little swagger like that. I also know the other reason you walk like that. I can figure out how much alcohol someone can consume before being legally drunk based on their height and weight in my head.” He took a deep breath and rubbed his hands down his thighs.

“You know the best thing about drugs, Steve?” Tony tapped his head. “It slows me down here. My mind moves maybe at average speed. It’s the only time I get some peace. The only time I feel something like normal. Problem is, it takes so much to slow me down it’s always dangerous. Always always always. Good thing I know how much I can handle right? It’s math. It’s all math. It’s just numbers and equations and dots and shaped in my head. Just math, just math, just--”

“Hey easy, easy.” Steve placed a hand on Tony’s thigh, stopping the frantic up and down motion. “Just slow down, Tony, breathe through it.”

“That’s exactly it! I can’t fucking slow it down!!” Tony’s laugh sounded a little manic and Steve flinched at the sound. “Nothing ever slows down and all you people angry with me? You have no idea what it’s like.” 

“I’m sorry Tony. I can’t say I understand, but…I’m sorry.” Steve finally said, and Tony sighed, seeming to deflate, slouching further down in the seat.

“Don’t take me home to Aunt Peggy’s. She cries every time I come home high, and I can’t do that to her tonight. It kills me when she cries. I’ve made her cry a lot. Seems like she’s always disappointed in me.”

“Alright.” Steve made a quick decision, switched lanes and turned the opposite direction. He didn’t say anything else until he pulled into the driveway of his duplex, walking around to help Tony out of the car. “Come on, then.”

His house wasn’t anything like the brownstone Tony lived in, but it was enough for just him, and Tony looked around the space with a curious smile on his face as Steve helped him lay down on the couch, grabbing a trash can in case he needed to vomit, and several bottles of water.

“Why didn’t you put me in your bed?” Tony leaned up on his elbow, a wicked smile curling around his lips. “You know, I see how you look at me. You think you’re sly, but you’re completely not.”

Steve sighed and rubbed his face.  “I-I  don’t look at you any particular way.”

Tony just smiled a little more and stretched out, his shirt pulling tight over his chest, and Steve made himself look away. “You look at me like you want me. Don’t you want me? Don’t you want to walk on the wild side? Come on and show me why blondes have more fun.”

Jesus Christ. Steve was so angry he could barely see straight. It was bad enough the boy was high, but to be talking like that, especially after kissing him like that was just too much.

“Whether that’s true or not,” he bit out through clenched teeth. “Not gonna touch you till you’re sober, Tony.”

The brunette giggled, a sound that would have made Steve’s knees weak if the situation had been different. “So when I’m sober you’ll bend me over and fuck me?” Tony clicked the “k” sound, “like over our study table in the library? Or up against the wall in that back corner? That could be fun.” 

Steve just shook his head in disbelief. “No. Tony, what the hell?”

Steve’s answer seemed to upset him, and Tony sat up farther, his grin disappearing. “What? Well why not? Why wouldn’t you fuck me? I’m gorgeous and you’re gorgeous. What’s the problem?” 

“Because I’m not that type of guy.” Steve insisted, tugging at his hair. This night was going so badly he could scarcely believe it. “I’m not-- I don’t do that sort of thing.” 

“You’re not gay?” Tony flopped back into the couch. “Did I read things that badly? Jesus H on a stick I can’t believe–”

“Tony, Tony hush.” Steve held up his hands to stop the rambling. “I meant I’m not the type of guy to just… fuck you like that. Not our first time together, and certainly not while you’re high.”

“Oh.” Tony thought for a few seconds. “That’s the only type of guy I know. Guys who would take me up on that offer.” Tony looked away and the truth-  the implications- of his quiet statement washed all the anger from Steve’s body.

“You need to know better people.” He said quietly, and Tony turned away, rolling over and hiding his face in the couch cushions.

“Better people like you? Cos I’d like to know you, Steve.” The words were muffled, but Steve still caught them and swallowed hard.

“I’d like to know you too Tony.”

#stony #stony fic #steve rogers #tony stark #college au #marvel #marvel fanfiction #piercings #glasses #drug use #falling in love #lost boy