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#kymans get behind me
akechi-if-he-slayed · 10 months
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liking south park (and having a BLOG or other account for it thereby engaging in fan art and fanfic) and then acting like you’re on a moral high ground for openly proclaiming your hatred of kyman and its shippers is like being in hell and saying well im better than that guy because he did something worse than me to get here!! like. who gives a shit we’re all in the same hellscape can we please play NICE with each other??? good god i know our favs are fourth graders but that doesn’t mean we have to act like literal children too
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victimized-martyr · 2 months
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Sorry I never gave a proper update on tumblr——
here’s some brainstorming doodles from Keo and me on the white board and some examples Keo made in my notebook. I won’t forget it, one of my harshest note was “NEVER draw Kenny in 3/4!! Trey hates that!” 🤣 The story leads stressed that Trey is very particular with acting decisions and poses, most of which don’t translate into the animation. It’s for him at the editing stage, to “make his voice sing”. Getting into Trey’s head, funnily enough, requires FEELING. Feeling what he’s going for in terms of delivery, to learn what not to take literally in his script (when trey says “kathleen kennedy is like terminator” it’s not what you initially think it means), what emotion or gesture to put in to elevate a joke, to get the message through. It’s so fascinating!
In short, I didn’t make the cut. I was “too fresh”, and needed more experience with the technical aspect of storyboarding…. but I was complimented by Keo for my intuition, something that can’t be taught. I was over the moon when I was told I got the style of the show, whereas other trainees with 10+ experience couldn’t. Some of them tested but don’t even watch the show!! That’s crazy, but I guess that’s to be expected. My knowledge of the show and deep love for the characters got me this far, but I need to work on my actual story boarding skills (keo said my struggles are in composition and scaling) to stay!! 💪🏼 I’m taking this… as a not yet, not a no. I’m already on their radar, in their database, I’m incredibly lucky I got to make my THIRD connection in the studio, I just need to work on myself until I can arrive. I’m so grateful for all the support from friends family and industry moots to get me this far, it’s only the beginning of the year but I don’t think anything could top what happened to me this March!!!!!
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north-park · 9 months
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The best Kyle characterization is never in style or Kyle-centric fanfics it's always in bunny fanfics where he is tangled in a side plot and he is biggest idiot on earth who can't see the most obvious shit before him and needs Kenny to explain the everything for him
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jelifishi · 1 month
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hai guys i dont really care if you like kyman or not but PLEASE don’t harass me or anyone else who likes it over it. the back button is right there and hell you could even block me. if you want to honestly debate id be cool w that but like dude yea i know its toxic as hell, I’d definitely say the tumblr community is MUCH calmer than the tt/twitter community on this topic but honestly i feel like a lot of people just pull out reasons from their ass to hate on it and refuse to have an open mind and actually listen to people. I would know because I used to be a kyman hater myself who refused to listen to reason, additionally I was really scared of openly being a kymannie because of the hatred around it in the community. Most of us here are adults or at the very least older teenagers from what I’ve seen and I think that’s the key difference as to why this place is a lot calmer than other places.
I honestly think that if antis actually like, weren’t so scared of being a kymannie they might actually listen to reason. now please note that this post is NOT to try and convince you to like kyman but its instead to try and convince you to not be a little bitch about it online if you dislike it. a lot of people forget that there is someone behind the screen and do you really need to make someone’s day worse over ship preferences ffs?? I honestly don’t get the big deal around shipping in communities and how much it’s hated on, sure I have ships i like and dislike but honestly i dont care what you like. Shipping drama is way too huge in communities and maybe this is just because im aroace but really it’s about how interesting of a story it is for me. I dont care if it’s healthy or not I just want it to be interesting. The only ships i really dislike are for trauma reasons. I’m not a proshipper nor do I support proshipping online, and I am a firm believer that kyman is not proship, but I do think that severe harrassment over ships EVEN proships isn’t a good thing. the block button is right there, just because you dont like something or support it doesnt mean you have to tell someone to off themselves. getting into petty internet arguments over which construction paper kids you think should be in a relationship is just immature.
also yes ) i know im being a little hater about people that are being haters but im sick of it and it affects people. also i dont harass people if they hate on kyman because its not worth my time
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zankagi · 4 months
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hey!! i've been thinking about a specific kyman scenario that i wanted to share here. i lowkey suck at speaking english so sorry if there are terrible grammar mistakes teehe. also, it's not really organized because i literally thought of this at 3 am last night, this is just me vomiting words.
⚠️ WARNING ⚠️: it has a little of nsfw. nothing explicit really because it isn't even important, but if you're uncomfortable with please be mindful of that. also, if you don't like or hate kyman, please don't read. just scroll past this.
ok so !! a highschool au where the boys are in the last year of highschool, and they start thinking about college and their adult lives. it's cartman's last year in south park bc he already decided to move out to another place (far away, i don't really know abt us states but you go imagine some place far from colorado). he applied to a prestigious college and he actually got accepted, so it's a huge opportunity for him. although there is another reason for him to leave south park apart from the fact that he doesn't like the town; and that is kyle. he's been in love with him for years now and he knows kyle would never like him back, so he wants to leave all his feelings behind and have a fresh start. he wants to forget kyle, or at least all the years he spent yearning for him.
the guys know, not about his massive crush on kyle of course, but about him moving out. at fist kyle thought that he would finally be free from cartman for good, and he didn't even have to do anything at all! but, the more the year progresses, the nature of their relationship changes. maybe it's because eric wants kyle to at least have a few good memories of him before he leaves, or maybe it's because deep down kyle can't imagine what his life without cartman would be. he isn't accustomed to not have cartman around, and he doesn't know what future holds for him (i imagine kyle would go to a college near south park, let's say it exists because i need it for the plot), so he's actually a little scared to lose his friends... even cartman. whatever the reason is, they start to grow closer. they start going out more (as friends, of course), they hang at each other's houses, they start laughing a lot more, and even though they can't stop fighting for absolutely everything, they find they start enjoying the fighting too (more like kyle finds out, eric has always enjoyed them in his own way).
kyle knew there was good in eric after all. he had lost hope at some point on trying to fix him, but he found that they could actually get along and they had a lot more in common than he realized. he remembered that there were some rare occasions in his childhood when cartman wasn't antagonizing him and they were actually on the same team. he remembered how fun it was back then, and he actually missed it. it was really fun. though weird, eric understood him in a way that kenny and even stan couldn't. it really was weird, but he was sure it was the same for eric too.
at some point in the year, this change in their relationship got kyle doing a lot of thinking. some random night, after a day spent laughing, arguing and playing videogames with eric, kyle came to the conclusion that he actually liked eric. he freaked out and was weird for a week or so, being especially weird with cartman. after a lot more of thinking, he got his head around the idea that he liked cartman, and wasn't as freaked out and weird anymore. he realized that this wasn't really news to him, he'd been obsessed with eric since they were kids, always trying to make him change for the better or trying to stop his schemes when he didn't really had to. he just never though much about it because it was "the right thing to do", but it all made so much more sense now. he wasn't telling anybody, though. not even stan. never.
so, the year goes by and he doesn't say a word and never acts on it. it would be stupid since eric's moving out in a week so whatever. the four boys decide to spend that last week together in a sort of farewell to eric. they have a really good time together laughing, having sleepovers and doing dumb and dangerous things together like when they were kids. everything is like the old times and there are no worries, no pressure, no uncertainty, no anxiety... just them being kids all over again.
the night before eric's trip arrives. he's leaving early in the morning and kenny, stan and kyle had already said their goodbyes to him. kyle is having dinner, but he can't stop thinking about eric leaving. he's leaving for who-knows how long to a really far distance from colorado... and, hell, he'd probably not come back anymore because, who would want to come back to fucking south park? the little, boring and stupid town that caused trouble to anyone living there? eric would probably start a new life, meet new people, far from anyone he knew before, he'll probably fall in love with someone else and make a good life away from everything and everyone. all of it while kyle is still in colorado and being miserable, probably.
that's when kyle can't take it anymore and when his family is asleep, he sneaks out from his house and goes to eric's. he climbs up to his window (just like eric did a lot of times when they were younger, entering to kyle's bedroom unannounced) and knocks lightly. eric was already in bed and was really confused when he saw kyle outside but opened the window for him anyway and helped him into his bedroom. they sit in eric's bed and the brunette looks at kyle for a few seconds before speaking.
"what are you doing here?" he asks.
kyle doesn't answer immediately, but looks around the room that was only illuminated by the rays of the moon entering from the same window kyle climbed. he sees eric's suitcase and various boxes with almost every decoration of the room inside them. he notices how the bedroom he knew for practically all his life and that was witness of so much memories was now cold, lifeless and felt strange and unknown. he feels his stomach sink uncomfortably and it's all he needs to muster up the courage to look eric in the eye and say "i wanted to see you." with the most sincere expression in his face.
eric tries (and fails) to suppress the blush that spread through his cheeks, and coughs to cover it up.
"you saw me yesterday." he replies, and kyle rolls his eyes. he doesn't appreciate being questioned because he feels exposed.
"yes, but you leave tomorrow morning and i don't know if i will be awake to see you go."
eric shrugs it off and they start chatting, laying on his bed, looking at the ceiling. they talk about everything, but mostly about memories together. they laugh together at some of them, and fight about other ones because they really can't stop arguing and antagonizing each other. the only difference is that now fighting seems more fun and friendly than before, and they both enjoy teasing the other and rile each other up. at some point they stop talking and enjoy the silence for a little bit and maybe it's the fact that it's kind of late and he's nostalgic, but kyle breaks the comfortable silence, whispering;
"even though i hate you with all my heart.." that was a lie. this year they grew closer and kyle realized not only that he liked eric, but that he actually never really hated him. "... i'm gonna miss you, man."
eric huffs a laugh. if kyle could be sincere with him, he could too.
"i hate you too." he lies. "but i'll miss you." they fall in silence again, and now is eric's turn to break it, feeling specially sincere that night. "hey," he starts. "remember that time when you moved to san fransisco?" he doesn't wait for an answer before speaking again. "that made me realize that nothing was the same without you... it wasn't as fun as before." he moved his head to look at kyle, who was already looking at him. fuck he thought. he looks beautiful. before embarrassing himself, he continued speaking, looking at kyle. "i can't believe i'm telling you this because i thought i would take this secret to my grave but... i did a plan to bring you back here. with butters, i mean. we did a plan to bring you back."
"really?" he asked, his green eyes gleaming.
eric explained him everything they (he) did and didn't miss any crazy detail. he told him everything they went through just to bring him back, and added that trying to replace him with butters ended up being more boring than originally planned. soon, he had kyle laughing at the anecdote. he couldn't believe eric did that for him, the ridiculousness of the situation and the fact that eric tried to replace him with butters of all people. and okay, fuck, kyle was beautiful laughing like that, eric couldn't hide his own smile.
kyle stops laughing and looks at eric, smiling at him. every coherent thought left his brain instantly, so he simply exhales and closes the distance between them, giving eric a short peck on the lips.
he immediately flinches and almost falls out of the bed with how quick he distanced himself. he blushes and starts frantically apologizing to eric, saying that it was an accident, that it was inappropriate and blah blah blah.
"shut up." says eric, grabbing kyle's cheeks with one hand, managing to make the ginger stop taking. he copies kyle's action, and gives him another chaste and short kiss. he stops squeezing kyle's cheeks and they separate again. they lock eyes for a few seconds before leaning in again and now kissing properly.
they make out for a while, one thing leading to another and well... they are boy. hormonal boys. i don't imagine that they fuck, i think they just masturbate together or maybe give the other a bj but you know what? i'll leave it up to you. you can even pretend this didn't happen. when they finish cleaning up (lazily, because eric doesn't want to be apart from kyle) they fall asleep together.
a few hours after, lianne knocks on eric's door and tells him that breakfast is ready. kyle and eric wake up and eric tells lianne that he would be downstairs in a minute. they look at each other in silence for a few minutes, kyle looking pensive and eric too sleepy to say anything.
that's when kyle has an idea, and he starts stripping eric off his shirt. eric starts panicking and tries to keep his shirt on. "wait, kahl." he says. "last night was great but i really need to go now."
kyle rolls his eyes and shuts him up with a kiss. one kiss becomes two, and three and four. kyle presses their foreheads together, eric looking confused but willing.
"i'm not going to do anything, dumbass." he explains, putting some distance between them. "i just want to keep your shirt."
"no." eric declines. "no way, this is one of my favorite shirts."
"i know." kyle replies, matter-of-factly. "that's the point. i will keep your favorite shirt so you have a reason to come back."
eric smiles at him, and concedes. "don't get too comfortable with it jew." he says, tossing the shirt at him, and searching in his suitcase for another shirt. "i will come back to get it."
they share a last kiss before lianne yells from the kitchen that the breakfast was getting cold. eric helps kyle get out from the same window and watches him go back to his house.
a few minutes later, eric and lianne are carrying the boxes and the suitcase in lianne's car. kyle couldn't go back to sleep, so he's watching them from his own bedroom. he watches as they get inside the car and how lianne starts driving, the car becoming smaller in the distance. he looks down at the shirt in his hands and clutches it. he wanted to put it on, but it had eric's smell on it and he didn't want it to disappear so soon. that shirt represented the promise that, some day, eric and kyle would see each other again.
AND THAT'S ALL!!!! well not all all. in my original idea they see each other again but many years later. eric comes back to south park and kyle has the old shirt forgotten in the back of his closet. he has a girlfriend now and they've been going out for a few years now. after eric left, stan kenny and kyle's friendship wasn't the same, they stopped seeing each other frequently and became good acquittanances (i hate that word) but do not fear because when eric comes back they start rebuilding their broship. the only thing that doesn't go back to normal is that now kyle has to fight his demons (bisexuality) and realize all over again that he's still in love with eric. he has a whole conflict with himself because he made a life without eric and now he has feelings for him again but he feels abandoned !! and also he is in a long-term relationship and he's happy !! but he hasn't talked to eric in years (let's say he changed his number or stopped reaching out at some point or whatever) and even if they spent YEARS apart, kyle had always had eric present in the back of his mind in some way or another (in the form of a shirt that has been forgotten) and now eric is back and his whole world and everything he constructed without him is upside down !!! but don't worry they figure it out and they end up together. this is not the official ending because this might as well end when eric leaves and have an open ending or it can end with eric not leaving, or him coming back as soon as possible, there's so many options... i'll leave it up to you, i like a little bit of drama and angst so i thought really quick about that last part that's why it is not as developed as the rest of the idea but !!!! who knows who knows everything is possible.
i just wanted to share my thoughts here because it's been DAYS and i can't get them off my head, it has been a while since i had kyman brainrot and now it came back at full force. blame the not suitable for children special for that (ik it didn't have kyman but it had eric and i love that little bastard so it all started with the eric cartman worms for brain and now here we are)
ANYWAYS I'M RAMBLING SORRY I LOVE TALKING hope you liked this any suggestions thoughts and or comments you may have are totally welcome !! have a nice day / night depending on when you are reading this hehe 🫶🫶
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hatsunevitu · 11 months
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man i LOVE kenman brotp (that goes along with kyman otp) so here’s an au
ok cw death
i was randomly thinking about an au where cartman got immortality too.
(idk how exactly tho, i think it had something to do with satan or jesus who wanted to teach cartman empathy and sympathy so he can understand how does it feel to live a life of less fortunate who suffer every day or smth like that)
so he got immortal and that’d be the funniest thing on earth because he definitely thought about it as a blessing, not a curse. because now he can do stupid things and not worry about it because he’ll just get back to life. and it’d save him a lot of time, he’d be like uhhhh going from school is sooooo long i guess i’ll just kill myself to respawn at home.
and that kinda helps kenny because for the first time he starts seeing his immortality as something remooootely positive?
and kenman are a partners in crimes brotp in this au because you can’t tell me cartman wouldn’t use their powers to rob banks and punish those he dislikes. and kenny just has to keep looking after cartman so he doesn’t kill himself too often.
(btw cartman TOTALLY would get killed in front of the guys on purpose once and recorded it on a video because he wanted to know their reaction and then he saw kyle literally almost CRYING and it made him feel kind of guilty… but he expected everyone to forget his death, like they forgot kenny’s, and so did happen, with one minor exception – kyle remembered… heheheh i’ll definitely write something about kyman in this au later)
anyway cartman convinces kenny that they can make BIIIG money if they use their superpower to rob a bank. kenny didn’t want to tempt the fate at first, but then cartman told him how he could save his family with the money and kenny finally agreed.
they’d be like:
kenny: (Now we divide the money we stole in half, equally, right?)
cartman: Actually, I think I deserve 60%, Kenny.
kenny: (What?! How come?)
cartman: I died twice during the mission!
kenny: (THAT’S BECAUSE YOU SHOT YOURSELF FOR FUN AND I HAD TO WASTE TWO HOURS TO WAIT FOR YOUR RETURN.)
cartman: I suffered more!
kenny: (Give me the money, asshole! We had a deal!)
cartman: Ugh, fine, fine. Take it, Poor Kid. Buy your sister a fucking doll, for all I care☹️
kenny would waste more time on calming cartman down than on actually doing crimes on the missions come on, ‘cause mf risks his life constantly due to his immortality.
he would come to a bank employee and start insulting and teasing him, and kenny would have to pull cartman away until this stupid ass got shot again.
cartman to the security guard: Ha! Try and stab me! Stab me, you pussy!!!
kenny, standing behind him with a threatening look: Do not.
AND ALSO KYMAN IN THIS AU because kyle does not remember kenny’s deaths but he DOES remember cartman’s so drama drama drama
and if cartman was immortal and kyle found out about it he’d get like super overprotective, because he doesn’t want to lose cartman forever just because this stupid asshole doesn’t take anything seriously and thinks that dying is fun.
so yep it’s basically brotp!kenman and kyman crime au and it’s been rotting my brain for like hours and now i want to write a fucking slowburn fanfic for 100k words.
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h-harleybaby · 11 months
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Cartman soft fucking Kyle's virgin gf and inviting him over to watch (and be horrified 🤗) after he found out kyle cheated on reader 🤭
Guess what’s going on my Cartman birthday special EHEHE 🤭🤭🤭 also you should totally listen to She’s So Nice by Pink Guy with this
Btw it’s not Kyman!!! Just letting y’all know
NSFW CONTENT
Cartman x Kyle’s gf!reader
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• Honestly, Cartman had his eye on you for a long time before Kyle did. Ofc he would keep pussying out of asking you out because he would keep convincing himself he was too good for you he was not
• So when you and Kyle got together, he started playing devils advocate. He was the person you went crying to when Kyle fucked up
• So ofc the day you came to Cartman, crying your pretty eyes out (that made him hard but we don’t talk about it) about how Kyle cheating on you, he welcomed you with open arms and told you about an absolutely NASTY completely filthy plan he came up with as a somewhat joke
• To his surprise you were down with it???
• Omg when you told Cartman you were inexperienced because you and Kyle had never done anything?? Instant boner, I shit you not
• He has a bit of a corruption kink so him taking Kyles pretty lil gfs virginity??? HEAVEN TO HIM
• So that’s how he found himself on a Saturday night, almost like any other, except he was trying not to laugh as you left Kyle a voice message of you crying saying how you wanted to talk with him and work it out
• Cartman wasted practically no time to start, already working on your clit with his fingers barely before you ended the voice message
• It was a surprising soft moment, it made you wonder if any of these sweet kisses had any meaning behind them? Spoiler alert, they did
• He felt a little bad so he was a lot easier on you than he normally would’ve ever been, taking his time to make sure you were ready for him
• Of course it didn’t last too long, because by the time Kyle had come over to your house you were already riding Cartman with his hands on your waist to guide you
• Understandably, Kyle was completely horrified by the sight of one of his frenemies soft fucking his pretty gf
• You thought it would end there but nope! Y’all ended up fucking well after Kyle left, almost like it didn’t matter that he saw in the first place BECAUSE IT DIDN’T AND CARTMAN REALLY WANTED TO FUCK YOU IN GENERAL
• Who knows where your relationship with Cartman stands now after he helped you get revenge on your ex bf?
• It’s me, I know. You guys start dating and he forever shoves it in Kyles face that he fucked his ex gf and got together with her
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alyeecoffee · 6 months
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I have an idea for a kyman AU again where Cartman always gives hints on Kyle and sometimes flirting at him. But sadly enough, Kyle didn't realize or even thought that Cartman was being annoying as usual or trying to piss him off.
Cartman will always come to Kyle and say something like, "you're looking good today Kyle" or any compliments he gives to the redhead, but Kyle's response always annoyed
One time Cartman stopped doing it and at the point Kyle rarely sees Cartman anywhere which made Kyle a bit worried and confused at Cartman's sudden disappearance, at first he tries to ignore it and thought he will eventually come back which is very wrong because the next thing he knows, the very next day, Cartman is seen to hold another guy's hand which Cartman found on the dating online app. Kyle was shocked to see this and started to wonder how tf Cartman got a boyfriend without his realization?
Long story short, Kyle started to question it directly to Cartman, asking him about how and why he dated this guy that he barely knew each other. And Cartman answers, "because he's the only person that will love me fully and treated me better!" Even though Cartman knows that this guy he found is a big RED flag. But he didn't care, at least there's someone who wants to stay beside him. Kyle was in disbelief to know all of this, he said, "Cartman, can't you see that this guy is dangerous?! You two barely know each other!" The reason why Kyle said the guy is dangerous is because, one time he eyed the guy when Cartman wasn't there and he saw the guy walk with a girl, they even kissed!! Kyle couldn't believe his eyes after that.
Actually Cartman knows it but, he pretended to be deaf and blind by the situation because he is hiding behind "he's the one who will love him" it hurts actually to know that the truth is no one likes him at all, he knows it.
That night he cried, suddenly. He started to reflect on himself and started to pity himself more. "Of course, no one likes me... why would I think there is?" He thought. After that, he fell asleep.
...
Kyle tries everything to stop Cartman and the guy from being in a relationship because Cartman was in an unhealthy relationship.
After a while, Kyle managed to break them off but in the end Cartman started to get furious at Kyle and said about why Kyle always has to ruin his relationship with anyone. And here it is, Kyle's mind started to click. He realized too, why did he do all of this in the first place?
Anyway, that night, Kyle started overthinking even through the 5 stages of grief and finally he's at the acceptance stage, he realized that he was jealous all the time and decided to make a move this time
And yeah, happy ending lol, dude, I wrote this at 11 PM, my eyes are tired 🥱🥱 so if there's any grammatical error, I'm sorry 🥹 gtg to sleep guys, bye~~✌️
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1moreoffkeyanthem · 2 months
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I'm starving. Please, tell me your faves SP long fics 🙇🏻‍♀️. Your recommendations are always the best.
Good morning here’s some breakfast! I’ve read a lottttt and I’ve definitely recommended a good chunk of these before, but there’s some more recent ones on this list too! Multiple pairings, some dark subjects, some fluffier stories, all fairly long and most of these are complete! Here we go!!!
The Thief Trilogy by Wintergrew! C’mon we know I’m gonna rec that one every chance I get lmao the lore and world building is absolutely phenomenal!!!
This House of Mine by OrcaTimes another one I’ve recommended a lot BECAUSE IT EATS OK?!? One of the first sp fics I read and it’s so incredibly well written and the character dynamics slay so hard and we know I’m a Kyle girlie I LOVE him in this! Creek centric too!
Ship In A Bottle by FayOfTheForest COMFORT FIC FRFR it got me hooked on style and it’s WONDERFUL
Painted in Shrouds by courtanie THE best kysterion out there I said what I said AINT NOBODY DOIN K2 LIKE COURTANIE the plot is so incredible dude holy shit I was on the edge of my seat
The Stag Prince by SynapticFirefly dude ok y’all know I’ll read anything w my beloved elf Kyle and I KID U NOT THIS IS THE BEST KYMAN IVE EVER READ!!! The characterization is PERFECT like THIS is kyman to me, plus sot au so ofc I’m down it is WONDERFUL the adults are iconic in it too and it’s really a The Gangs All Here story
Hunger Pains by bellwether I KNOW I DONT SHUT UP ABT THIS ONE BUT I DO NOT CARE it truly altered my brain chemistry god chapter 16(?) I believe in particular fuck dude kenny in the whole thing but there’s this moment… and STAN I love my son so much and this is EASILY one of my favorite Stans ever plus I LIVE for Cartman caring about the guys in his own way this fic dude I could write an essay on it
The Illegitimate Opportunity Structure by espyonz STENNY OH MY FUCK this one is PHENOMENAL so far
Behind The Wall by Jwink85 look man ngl this one has been on my rec lists before and that’s because it’s INCREDIBLE also we know I fuck w jwink for the most part. Such an incredible portrayal of abusive relationships and so, so good. The style girlies gettin fed too FUCK I love them. Also dude jwink in general has some incredible stuff just be prepared for some dead dove action in some
speaking of consuming super dead doves, BRUH fuckin To Have And To Hold by courtanie JESUS CHRIST I KNOW IVE RECED THIS ONE BEFORE TOO BUT THATS BECAUSE ITS OBJECTIVELY ONE OF THE BEST STORIES IVE EVER READ YALL want k2? Dark Cryle? Kenny and Stan teamup? The gang forming a plan? Kyle never losing his fire despite everything? Mannnn look no further! I wanna make this a movie so bad
Knives by SparrowGrim dudeeeeeee this is such a cool premise and it feels VERY southparkian in a dystopian kind of way!
South Park Confidential by FayOfTheForest Dude I love this one we got the holy trinity of sp ships with style bunny and creek! It’s such a thrilling crime story SO cool to see characters develop and overcome their own shit, like dude!!!
You know I ain’t doin a rec list without shouting out to the homies!!! Song Of Broflovski by asteria7, pep and rm by boxwinebaddie, Entries From The Past by ViviBaby69420, A Ballad Of True Hearts by luckypoppies, ALL OF THESE KICK SO MUCH ASS!!!
Ok man that’s what I can think of as of rn, THANK U SO MUCH FOR ASKIN
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sprinklez-sparklez · 11 months
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♥️ Kyman Week | Day 5 💚
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⏱️ First Day + Adulthood ⏱️
Couldn’t think of any creative kid scenarios so I decided to mash the two prompts together for this! Today is the first day of Kyle leaving the house for longer than usual for his job while Cartman wants to continue to sleep and cuddle with his baby 💕
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It was 6:00 AM. Kyle was putting on his best suit and tie for his office job interview. Granted the interview isn’t until 8:00 AM and the office building is really close by (about an hour or so) but nonetheless, Kyle still wants to be prepared for anything important that might happen before the interview.
As he walked out of the door he heard a noise behind them. It sounded like footsteps. “Kahl?” A sleepy voice was heard. Kyle turned around. “Cartman? What are you doing up early?” He said softly as walked towards his droopy eyed boyfriend. “Why the hell are YOU up so early?” Cartman asked back as he rubbed his eyes.
“Don’t you remember? I have a job interview today. They want me at 8 so I’m preparing myself to leave.” Kyle said as he adjusted his tie.
Cartman’s eyes then shot open and his mouth let out a surprised yet deadpan “What?”
“Yep.” Kyle said as he gave his shocked boyfriend a kiss on the forehead. “In the meantime you can treat yourself to all the food you want and do whatever you want until I come back.” He smiled and started to walk away. “See you in five hour-” Kyle suddenly felt a tight hug.
“No.”
Kyle looked at Cartman in shock. They’ve been separated before, why is Cartman suddenly forbidding him from leaving the house? “Uhh, babe I gotta go.”
“No you don’t. You’re staying with me and you’re going back to bed with me.” Cartman said stubbornly.
“Cartman I’m leaving and you can’t stop me from going.”
That’s when his face started to turn red and he fell to the floor. He still had a good tight grip on Kyle’s arm.
“KAAAHHL! PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME ALOOONE! I DONT WANT TO BE BY MYSELF! PLEEEASEEEE” The curly haired man cried in a high pitched whiny voice.
“I’ll only be gone for five hours. You’ll survive, babe” Kyle said as he looked down to his sobbing boyfriend with an annoyed expression. He really didn’t have time for his whining. Especially now.
“NOOOO!” Cartman weeped. “I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOUU!”
As Cartman cried, Kyle sighed. Kyle kneeled down and looked at his boyfriend who had tears coming out of his eyes and snot coming out of his nose. He hugged Cartman and wiped away his tears. He even gave the guy gentle kisses on his soft left cheek. As much as Kyle wanted to stay and continue their cuddle session, he had to go out and get this job for the sake of the two of them.
As Kyle continued to comfort Cartman, he thought to himself, What am I going to do with this guy?
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bloogers-boogers · 7 months
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dude, ur thoughts on kyttersman? (kyle/butters/catman) >:]]
Ohhh that’s a new one, I’ve never heard of it before 👀👀 personally I see Butters hating Kyle for being a “im always right” type of guy and Kyle just disliking him for being a “pushover”. So it’s hard to picture them liking each other but I wouldn’t criticize it either, seems interesting 😗 however it’s funny cause I like both cartters and kyman so maybe if it’s them fighting over who’s turn to have cartman for themselves (tho I think kyle would not be fond of sharing) but in this specific scenario I could definitely see them acting okay with sharing cartman when he’s around but behind his back they’re both trying to get rid of the other just to have him, eventually falling in love with the other over that “small” rivalry for Cartman’s whole heart. That would definitely be a funny dynamic for me to get into hahshshs
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11x13kyle · 11 months
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So I am a Jewish multishipper and I do like kyman because I guess I enjoy torturing myself, but I completely understand why you hate it. Everyone always likes to act shocked whenever a Jewish person in the fandom says they don’t like kyman, even though to this day shippers will post insanely antisemitic content in the tag on ao3 and also out in the wild without it ever being addressed. They also really enjoy hiding behind Jewish shippers whenever anyone calls them out on their bullshit. Everyone bothering you right now is giving very much a hit dog will holler.
thank you SO much for talking to me normally, it’s a total breath of fresh air lol. and yeah exactly it’s VERYYY much a hit dog will holler situation!! if someone comes into my inbox with an accusatory tone and is acting confrontational, it’s so odd to expect me to be nice back! i match the energy and get called aggressive and unreasonable lmao
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victimized-martyr · 2 years
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20 & 28? i love all ur takes on kyman so so much!!!
These questions are a blast! I'm just happy y'all give me the chance to ramble abt them ghfs so thankssss
20. Do Stan and Kenny (and Butters) approve of this relationship?
Kenny canonically keeps most of his opinions to himself, and likes to watch from a distance. He’d approach Kyman in the same way, watching them unfold with a morbid curiosity, dishing his legendary advice only when he feels he absolutely must. Does that make him a dick? Probably. But, what else would you expect from Eric Cartman’s best friend?  
Butters on the other hand, is super vocal in his approval. The moment Cartman announces he’s with Kyle, its streams of "Congratulations, Eric!” and “Shoot, anyone could see this comin’ a mile away!" and “Don’t go breakin’ Kyle’s heart, Eric. He’ll fuck you up nine ways to Sunday if you do :D” 
And then there’s Stan. 
Kyle. and Cartman. Cartman and Kyle. Together….Would he approve? Well, he wouldn’t know. This indecision isn't the result of slow observation; he sensed something between Cartman and Kyle before they realized they had feelings for one another. It’s that Stan hates change, and he's anxious to think how the relationship will permanently affect the group, the one thing in Stan's life that’s endured all of South Park’s shittiness. Would things change for the better? Or worse? There’s so many ways Cartman and Kyle could fail and make things awkward in the group. Or, what if they get so engrossed with each other that they left him behind? That he disintegrates into white noise, losing his best friend? Cartman’s the only person capable of bringing out emotions no one else could with Kyle, so will he become the best or worst version of himself? It’s all too much. He needs a lot of time to process it. 
 More than anyone else, Kyle seeks Stan’s approval in his decisions, and has often come to him to rant about Cartman. Usually, he’d get a blunt response that refocuses him, if he ever gets a response at all. This time, he needs a prompt response, and Kyle’s patience is infamously thin. Kyle is already wracked with anxiety about whether being with Cartman is the “right” thing to do. Seeing Stan close in on himself once hearing the news sends Kyle’s paranoia thru the roof lmao. 
This is a whole ass fic askin to be written (am i not writing one already HILKDJGHLI), but essentially, Stan and Kyle would have a fallout before Stan reaches a conclusion on Kyman. Stan would probably say something he’d regret and be all moody and emotional for a while. Then he’ll get bitch slapped some sense into him by Wendy, or Kenny, or hell, maybe Cartman (because “Darsh, I can’t properly make out with mah boo cause he’s too busy PMS’ing over his butfucking-boyfriend. So cut the shit out already. "). He’s forced to realize that he should still be there for his best friend, whether he ends up approving of the relationship or not. Yes, Kyle wants his approval, but he also wants his super best friend more. (stg this is Kenny Dies all over again. Hoe runs away to deal with his own emotions before being there for others. When will he learn lol)
Stan’s wary for a majority of the relationship. But he’s there for Kyle. He’ll always be there. 
28. controversial opinion on kyman?
It has less to do with Kyman and more to do with tropes. I'm so SO tired of Party at Tolkien's House as the catalyst for Kyman. ;-; it's just, too easy to write, and it's even easier to fall into the trappings of "kiss as the only romantic awakening" and teen angst. Honestly? The kids probably wouldn't be able to enjoy themselves, bc the adults suck, and it's south park, so they end up crashing the party. And then aliens get involved, bc shit like that happens. Kyle and Cartman are feelin each other up and wanna seal the deal in the closet~? Well they can't. Randy's in there playin 7 minutes in heaven with a monkey and lo and behold, is the reason we have monkeypox declared as a health emergency.
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souloftheintrovert · 2 years
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on the first day of watching the entirety south park to find all the kyman content i can find and put it in a list the show gave to me: cartman gets an anal probe, volcano, weight gain 4000, big gay al’s gay boat ride, an elephant makes love to a pig, death, pinkeye, starvin’ marvin’, mr. hankey the christmas poo, damien, tom’s rhinoplasty, mecha-streisand, and cartman’s mom is a dirty sIut. holy fuck!
on the second day of watching the entirety south park to find all the kyman content i can find and put it in a list the show gave to me: terrance and philip in not without my anus, cartman’s mom is still a dirty sIut, ike’s wee wee, chickenlover, conjoined fetus lady, the mexican staring frog of southern sri lanka, city on the edge of forever, summer sucks, chef’s chocolate salty balls, chickenpox, roger ebert should lay off the fatty foods, clubhouses, cow days, chef aid, spookyfish, merry christmas charlie manson, gnomes, and prehistoric ice man. holy fuck!
on the third day of watching the entirety south park to find all the kyman content i can find and put it in a list the show gave to me: rainforest shmainforest, spontaneous combustion, succubus, jakovasaurs, tweek vs. craig, sexuaI harassment panda, cat orgy, two guys naked in a hot tub, jewbilee, korn’s groovy pirate ghost mystery, chinpokomob, hooked on monkey fonics, starvin’ marvin in space, the red badge of gayness, mr. hankey’s christmas classics, are you there god? it’s me jesus, world wide recorder concert, and bigger longer & uncut. holy fuck!
on the fourth day of watching the entirety south park to find all the kyman content i can find and put it in a list the show gave to me: tooth fairy’s tats 2000, cartman’s silly hate crime 2000, timmy 2000, quintuplets 2000, cartman joins nambla, cherokee hair tampons, chef goes nanners, something you can do with your finger, do the handicapped go to hell, probably, fourth grade, trapper keeper, helen keller! the musical, pip, fat camp, the wacky moIestation adventure, and a very crappy christmas. holy fuck!
on the fifth day of watching the entirety south park to find all the kyman content i can find and put it in a list the show gave to me: it hits the fan, cripple fight, super best friends, scott tenorman must die, terrance and philip: behind the blow, cartmanland, proper condom use, towelie, osama bin laden has farty pants, how to eat with your butt, the entity, here comes the neighborhood, kenny dies, and butters’ very own episode. holy fuck!
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amporella · 2 years
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I do wonder, what do you think it is about Kyle in particular that gets fans so riled up? It always seems like so much of the fighting is centered around him.
Ahh, what a question... if this kind of discourse were directed towards literally ANY other character, this might be a more difficult question, but as is, the answer is relatively simple; he's Jewish, and he has the audacity to defend himself. His relationship with Cartman certainly plays a role too, but I think that's more of a subpoint to the previous point rather than a totally new point.
You're absolutely right, though; so much of the fighting IS centered around Kyle, and NO other character gets this much flak - especially not personally. A large portion of this fandom often makes the jump between 'Kyle did something dickish' (which, of course, he does, he is ten) and 'Kyle himself IS a dick'. This is treatment that not even CARTMAN gets; I feel comfortable saying that I have seen more posts saying Kyle is pathetic/any relevant synonym (even in jest, which is often hard to distinguish from genuine vitriol) than I have of people saying Cartman is pathetic. Before Post-Covid, people would scavenge for crumbs to justify Cartman's behavior; I can't count the number of times I've seen 'okay, well, he saved those cats in Major Boobage, so he can't be all bad?' which, great, but it's quite obvious that a) Cartman also frequently abuses his own cat and b) Cartman saving cats and hiding them in his attack was a quite obvious metaphor for hiding Jewish people around the Holocaust and WWII; it wasn't meant to be taken seriously. Normally, Cartman doesn't seem to give a single fuck about cats, let alone his own cat. His behavior wasn't evidence that he has a heart, or that he's not all bad; it was, as always, a Cartman-related joke at the expense of Jewish people - a joke at the expense of Kyle, specifically, as most of the jokes boil down to. Post-Covid gave even more ammo towards Cartman being utterly irredeemable, but he's obviously still being defended vigorously by specific people, some out of ignorance and others out of genuine malice.
I mention Cartman and these events as an example because I think it's very relevant; the venn diagram between rabid Cartman (and kyman, sometimes) fans and Kyle haters is very close to a circle. It's not that Kyle himself has done anything wrong by existing as a Jewish character; it's that the same people who desperately want to believe Cartman can change come to resent Kyle for his existence, because he serves as a stark reminder that Cartman CAN'T change. They'll come up with as many logical loopholes as possible to TRY and pretend that he can (recent examples I've seen being 'Kyle is fictional, and his abuse doesn't matter', 'Cartman isn't a nazi, he just hates Kyle in particular' and 'Cartman was the one who tried to bring the main four back together, he changed while Kyle didn't), and when that inevitably doesn't work, they turn their anger onto Kyle. This is antisemitic - the justifying of a Jewish character's abuse from a nazi (and Cartman IS a nazi, I would be happy to elaborate if anyone wants me to) is always antisemitic, regardless of whether he's fictional or whether he was a little too uppity for you in one specific episode. I have seen posts from these same Kyle haters on Twitter that essentially admit to what they're doing; they want Kyle dead because, in their eyes, he reverses Cartman's progress - in Post-Covid, he 'ruins' Cartman's chance at having a family by existing. This is obviously not true - Cartman is responsible for his own actions, and Kyle existing as a Jewish man and being unwilling to forgive his abuser is not a crime - but it's the general reasoning behind it.
This is one of the reasons that those derogatory jokes agitate me; because there are people who legitimately think this way about the characters, and who are so delusional that to them, Kyle IS pathetic and DOES deserve to die alone, because he is Jewish and has the audacity to exist, which upsets Cartman. The repetition of these phrases in a 'loving' way towards Kyle legitimizes them - it makes the people who genuinely believe them go 'okay, well, if these Kyle likers think he's pathetic, surely it's less antisemitic if I think so', but it isn't. In this way, calling Kyle a loser/pathetic/etc legitimizes the antisemitism directed towards him; it gives Kyle haters something to point to to claim that their hatred of him ISN'T based in his Jewish identity and that he doesn't lay down and take abuse. This is regardless of the intentions of the people who make these jokes; I'm sure they don't mean harm, but it's actively harmful at worst and not helpful in the slightest at best.
Anyway, this was long, so TL;DR: Cartman fans are Kyle's biggest group of haters, and Kyle's existence serves as evidence that Cartman is incapable of reform, causing them a) believe Cartman's hatred of him is justified and b) join in on that hatred.
Thanks for the ask!
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hatsunevitu · 1 year
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SO i’ve been thinking about this plot when cartman dies. or rather, particularly about kyle’s reaction to cartman’s death ‘cause yk. kyman is rotting my brain.
first of all i strongly believe that everyone who thinks kyle would be happy or indifferent about cartman’s death are mischaracterising him so badly. like. come on. you don’t have to ship kyman to understand this would be a major shock for him and he would possibly even blame himself. think whatever you want, but they’re still best friends no matter what.
then, um, i think that only three people would actually react to cartman’s death properly, and it’s stan, butters and kyle. but stan’s reaction would be something similar to s5e13 “kenny dies”, because he would freak out about one of his friends dying, not because it’s exactly cartman. then goes butters who doesn’t really understand the concept of dying but is still pretty confused and scared. they’re very close so it would hurt butters. kenny doesn’t show any strong emotions, but that is because he’s used to death and anyway he’ll definitely meet cartman in hell.
what about kyle, though, i’m pretty sure that he won’t believe this news for a single second for, like, several days. he would convince everyone it’s “One of these stupid pranks, come on, dude, don’t tell me he managed to fool you”. and although most of the people didn’t believe cartman’s death the first second, kyle would be stubborn enough to deny reality for almost a week. he would look at cartman’s dead body and be like “Wow, that’s almost convincing, you really outdid yourself, Fatass. This fake corpse must’ve really cost you a fortune” and everyone else around him has no idea how to tell him it’s true.
he would stand at cartman’s funeral with the most bored and irritated face saying loudly: “Okay, Fatass, we get it, you tricked us all, bravo, now cut this shit off already, it’s not even funny anymore”, making liane cry even more desperately.
but then there went five days, then a week, and kyle finally started to realise the truth because cartman is too hyperactive to do this kind of prank for so long, he would definitely get bored and show up after, like, two days of disappearance.
and kyle really understood that while everyone else was mourning he was being a dick not even letting himself think for a single minute that this all might be real. like. he couldn’t even imagine a thought of the world without cartman, it just seemed so wrong so he really preferred acting like it’s all fake. and it made him feel so, so guilty. i’m pretty sure at that moment he almost forgot every horrible thing cartman had done to kyle, he just kept thinking about positive moments and he started missing cartman so badly. he wouldn’t admit it to anyone, even to himself, probably, but his life without cartman was somehow incomplete.
and then the rage came. we know how kyle tends to overreact and do something massive when he feels negative emotions, right? like, he tried to burn down the school because of the girls’ list, he freaking nuked canada after seeing cartman and heidi dating and being left behind, and i’m pretty sure there are plenty of examples.
so no matter how cartman died he would try to compensate it somehow. he didn’t know how to deal with this grief and shock so he tried to fight with the reason. did cartman die ‘cause of doctors incompetence? then kyle will sue the goddamn hospital cartman died at. car accident? he will organise a picket about drivers’ carelessness and send the person who hit cartman to jail. and so on, so on.
and everyone would be surprised and he would make excuses like “I’m not doing it because of Cartman, it’s just… it’s a big problem in our country, I want justice, that’s all”.
but he would blame himself. for his constant fights with cartman, for his disbelief the first days, for letting cartman die like this and not being around. and he started to think about their friendship when cartman was alive and–
kyle: It’s been two weeks, and I still can’t believe it, Stan. In my mind he’s still here and I expect to see him at the bus stop every morning. Is it normal?..
stan: I know how you feel. It’s hard for all of us, dude.
kyle: I mean, why did it take me so long to understand he wasn’t joking?
stan: Well, you guys were sort of archrivals, so I guess it’s not surprising...
kyle: Huh… we were, weren’t we?…
and it’s so heartbreaking.
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