#its hard to tell if i dont really thiknig abt kissing for myself bc of gender dysphoria/perception or bc i just genuinely dont like it

[captainshyguy]

orientation thoughts...

#mani just.... #i have a few fictional crushes #but those are like. fictional #i got crushes easily in school. but like #do i care about dating??? at all???? #huh #its hard to tell if its like 'i hate the het dating/wedding scene and how they all do romance' #and im much more private #or if perphapsim arospec #idk man just...a qpr sounds...better??? or even just living with a friend #its hard to tell if i dont really thiknig abt kissing for myself bc of gender dysphoria/perception or bc i just genuinely dont like it #like i like thinknig abt kissing quirrel i gues but thats it KJVNDFKJGDNHD #many thoughts.... #i guess it doesnt matter for now #i have absolutely no intentions to date atm #i have friends that im like 'i wish i could live with you in the future or just exist near' #and maybe hug or just lean head on shoulder when they're talking abt stuff #which is its own kind of love #but romantic???? #idk!!! #this is why i like just calling myself gay. nice umbrella term #imjust a gayass #whatever i feel and however im perfomring it is not how cishet people tend to and thats goodenough for me #as long as im doing it in my own way #luke rambles